Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Four young monsters stood outside of the King’s house in the capital city. Three stood back in a tight group, and one close to the door.

“Undyne. Don’t do it!” Aaron hissed under his breath. Shyren and Woshua were peeking out from behind him. A young, slim monster, still a child, glared back at them.

“What happened, Aaron?” Undyne barked at them. “Is the ‘little girl with noodle arms’ braver than you? You said you won’t fight little girls, but I’ll show you who’s stronger and tougher, you meat-head.” Undyne turned towards the door and pounded it with her fist. “Open up, Asgore Dreemuur! Open this door and face me!”

“Oh no. Oh no oh no oh no” Woshua burbled.

“He’s...killed humans...Undyne. Humans are...strong.” Shyren said quietly.

“Hah!” Undyne laughed. “Humans are strong because they’re mostly water! I’m mostly water too!” She pointed to her chest with her thumb. She looked thoughtful for a second “Well, at least half. Probably. I think? I know water magic, anyway!”

“Undyne, look. I’m sorry I called you a little girl with noo-” Aaron started, but Undyne had already turned back towards the door and started hitting it again. The door rattled in its frame.

“I’m calling you out, King Asgore! Get out here, you old goat!” Undyne took two steps back. She started forward again, and swung her foot at the door as hard as she could. The door swung open, Undyne’s foot hit nothing but air, and she lost her balance and fell backwards onto her rear end.

“Ooooowww.” Undyne whined with her eyes squinted shut in pain.

“Oh my. Are you alright?” A deep voice said above her. Undyne steeled herself, opened her eyes, and looked King Asgore square in the...knees. She went a bit pale as she tilted her head way back and saw two big, brown looking down at her in concern. Dang, he was bigger than she was expecting. Still, she couldn’t back down now. Undyne hopped to her feet, put her hands on her hips, got on her tip-toes to give herself a couple extra inches, and put on her meanest face.

“King Asgore Dreemuur, I, Undyne...of...the Waterfall, challenge you to a duel to the de...to uh...to first wound!” she said, pointing at Asgore

“Why in the world would you want to do that?” Asgore frowned.

“To prove to these bozos,” She pointed behind her. “that I’m the toughest, strongest, and bravest monster under the mountain!”

Asgore looked over her head with a puzzled look on her face. Undyne turned around to see that the street behind her was completely empty. Her jaw dropped.

“Ah. I see. I had a friend that...uh...no one could see when I was younger as well. His name was Mister Fuzzy and he liked to get into all kind of trouble when my parents weren’t around.” Asgore said, kindly.

“They’re not imaginary! They’re just cowards!” Undyne yelled and stamped her feet.

“Well then, you certainly proved who the bravest is, didn’t you?” Asgore smiled. Undyne narrowed her eyes and growled. How dare they! How dare they tease her! How dare they belittle her! How dare they just abandon her! And how dare this big...wimpy...loser patronize her like that! Undyne clenched her fist and her growl turned into a roar as she spun around and swung at Asgore as hard as she could. Asgore took one step back and Undyne’s fist only just grazed the folds of his shirt.

“Is that really necessary, now?”

“Shut up!” Undyne stepped forward and threw another punch. Asgore gently nudged her hand to the side, causing her to swing wide. She tried to hit him with an uppercut. He tilted his head back and she missed. She feinted a blow to his right side, and when he sidestepped, she jumped into the house behind him. She kicked backwards to try and hit the back of his leg. Asgore simple lifted his leg up, let her foot shoot under it, and then he stepped out into the street. He didn’t want to fight inside the house. He had just vacuumed the carpet. Undyne growled again. She couldn’t lay a finger on him, and he wasn’t even fighting back! She charged him, tried to hit him again and again. Each time he either side-stepped her punch or batted her hand out of the way.

“You’re not even fighting me! Why won’t you hit back!” Undyne yelled.

“Why would I?” Asgore shrugged.

“Because I’m going to beat you up!” Undyne pressed her attack harder, punching, kicking, trying to grapple, but she couldn’t seem to get more than the edge of his clothes.

Undyne didn’t know how long this went on. All she knew was that soon she was breathing heavily and sweat was pouring down her face. She couldn’t touch him, and he hadn’t lifted his hand to do more than parry her blows. All he did was look at her with a concerned expression. It was absolutely infuriating.

“Why!” She swung and missed

“Won’t!” She swung again, and was parried.

“You!” She tried to sweep at his leg. He stepped over it.

“Fight!” She stood up and actually dove at him, trying to knock him to the ground. Asgore twisted to the side. By the time Undyne even registered what happened, her chin struck the pavement with a crack. She yelped, grabbed her chin, and curled her body up into a ball

“Aaaahh! Ow! Ow ow ow ow!” Undyne cried out, rocking gently on the ground. She pulled her hand away from her chin for a second. There was a grey streak on her palm. First wound. She had lost, just like that. Undyne felt a shadow envelop her. She tried to get back to her feet, but she only got as far as her hands and knees. She felt completely spent.

“You won. You won, okay?! Leave me alone.” She croaked

“Don’t fuss.” Asgore said. He kneeled down and put a finger under her chin. He lifted her head up so he could see her face. Undyne looked at him, and all she saw was concern on his face. Asgore saw a mixture of pain, frustration, and humiliation on hers. Tears were starting drip down her cheeks. He also saw a nasty scrape on her chin.

“Tsk. Let’s get that cleaned.” He rumbled. He stood back up, put a hand under her arm, and lifted her back to her feet like she weighed nothing. She was wobbly for a second, but she managed to stay up. She didn’t say anything. She didn’t even look at Asgore. She just nodded and followed him into the house.

“This may sting a little.” Asgore brought a bowl of steaming water to Undyne, who was sitting at his living room table. Undyne smelled something medicinal in it. He pulled a cloth out of the water, squeezed it out as best as he could with one hand, and dabbed her chin with it. Undyne’s face curled up into a wince, but she held her head firm and still.

“Very good.” He said, and dropped the dirty cloth back in the bowl and set it on the table. He pulled a wide, self-adhesive bandage out of his pocket, and a small tube of...something. Asgore partially unwrapped the bandage and squeezed a squiggle of thick, cloudy gel onto the cotton pad. He placed the pad against her chin, pulling the wrapping away and sticking the bandage to her skin in one, smooth motion.

“There were go. Hopefully it won’t scar now.” Asgore stood up. Undyne rubbed her chin to smooth down the edges of the bandage, and then seemingly became very interest in the tabletop. There was a few seconds of silence. Before Asgore cleared his throat.

“Would...um...would you like some tea?”

“...Uh...yeah, sure.” Undyne shrugged, still not looking at him. Asgore picked the bowl off the table and went into the kitchen, leaving Undyne to her thoughts.

Asgore seemed like such a big softy. Obviously he was very fast, very strong, and skilled, but he didn’t act like a fighter. Just by the way Asgore moved, Undyne knew that he could have laid her flat by the time she went in for the second swing. Then why didn’t he? Well, on second thought, why would he? He didn’t have to try to harm her even once and Undyne still lost the battle.

Huh.

A few minutes later, Asgore stepped into the living room with a tray. On it was a steaming teapot, two cups with saucers, and a little bowl of sugar cubes.

“Here.” He placed it on the table. “This is yellow flower tea, my favorite. I grow them myself.” He filled both cups and placed one in front of Undyne. Yellow flower tea, huh? Well, she wasn’t going to be afraid of trying new things. She picked it up by the handle, put it to her lips and drained half of it in one go.

“Careful! It’s still very hot.”

Undyne shook her head “Nah. It’s perfect.” She gave a snaggle toothed grin, but she was pretty sure there was steam coming out of her ears. She decided to let the rest cool for a bit. Asgore took the tiny teacup in his massive hands, held it by the handle with his pinky out, smelled the tea, and then took a sip.

“Ahhh, perfect.” He smiled and placed it back on the table. “Now, would you like to tell me why you wanted to fight me?”

“Because my friends are jerks!” She scowled. After a few seconds, her expression softened. “Well...only one is. I guess. Shyren is too shy to say anything like that, and Woshua is too...occupied with cleaning. But Aaron was making fun of me because he’s got great big muscles and I don’t!”

“Muscles don’t mean everything.” Asgore said.

“That’s what I tried to tell him!” Undyne threw her hands up. “He’s all ‘Hur dur, I got arms like a royal guard and you got little noodles with hands attached to them’ and I’m telling him that I’m still stronger and tougher than him and I could kick his butt any day of the week and twice on thursdays and he’s all ‘well I don’t fight little girls, doy’ and I said I would prove it by fighting the toughest monster under the mountain and so…here I am. Hi.” She gave a small wave.

Asgore chuckled. “Well, you did fight me. And you tired me out quite a bit.”

“Yeah...but…” Undyne slumped in the chair. “I fought as hard as I could and you didn’t even fight at all and I still couldn’t beat you. I mean, I couldn’t even land one hit on you. Maybe I'm not really good at fighting.”

Asgore saw how dejected she looked, and felt a stab of guilt. In a sense, he admired the child. She stood up to a monster that was much bigger and stronger than she was. She didn’t back down and she didn't give up, even when it was obvious she couldn't win. She fought and fought until she couldn’t fight anymore. She had a lot of spirit, a lot of fire. She had determination, and he still needed human souls. Maybe...

“Well...would you like me to teach you how?”

She looked at him suspiciously, “How to what?”

“How to fight. How to beat me. You have a lot of potential, child. I think you can, with time and practice.”

Undyne’s eyes went wide. “Really?!”

Asgore nodded firmly.  

“Yes! Yes yes yes! Thank you!” She bounced in her chair. She probably would have hugged the huge monster if there wasn’t a table in the way. Asgore laughed.

“Very well. Come back the same time next week and we’ll start. For now, you should finish your tea before it gets cold.”

“Oh, right.”

God, Undyne hated traveling through Hotlands. Even with the elevator system cutting most of the travel time down, any time she was outside, she felt like she was walking in an oven. By the time she got to the boat person, she was covered in sweat and her fins felt like they were about to crack.

“Tra-la-la. Care for a ride?” The boat person sang.

“Yeah. One second.” Undyne wheezed. She dropped her bag in the boat, stepped off the bank and plunged into the river, still wearing her clothes. The boat person looked over the edge into the water. After a few seconds, Undyne’s head popped back to the surface. She spat a stream of water out of her mouth.

“Ahh! That’s much better.” She grabbed the edge of the boat, leaned over, and tumbled head over heels onto boat’s deck, landing on her back.

“Where will we go today?” The boat person asked, leaning over and looking down at her.

Undyne pointed to the air. “The waterfall, please!”

“Then we’re off.” The boat person picked up a long staff and used it to push away from the riverbank. Once they were a few feet out, the boat caught the current and started to travel down the river.

“The water is calm. It’s a lucky day today.” The boat person said in a sing-song voice.

“Sure is.” Undyne smiled, as she lay on her back and watched the sparkling gems at the top of the cavern go by.

***

As the years went by, Undyne traveled to Asgore’s house once a week for training. Some weeks it was sparring with wooden staves, wooden swords, and wooden shields. Some weeks it was exercising and endurance training. Some weeks she would practice using her water magic to hit straw targets. She was especially good at that. After each and every training session, they had a cup of tea together. Although she never really seemed to “bulk up” very much like she first intended to, Asgore was proud to see her growing into a tall, strong, young lady.

One week, they were sparring with wooden staves. The house basement echoed with the rhythmic, furious clacking of wood hitting wood. Asgore tried not to look it, but he was barely keeping up with her. Each blow he blocked rattled his arms, and she nearly slipped through his defenses multiple times already. Soon, they locked their staves and stared each other down. Asgore with his gentle smile, and Undyne with her rusty-saw grin. Asgore had once told her to train make sure she had no weaknesses, but when the battle really counted, to make sure to focus on her strengths. Well, she was really good at target practice, wasn’t she? She probably wasn’t going to win this, but it was worth a try. Even if she messed it up, she was going to go out in style. Asgore hooked his staff behind her leg and tried to pull forward and trip her up. Undyne nimbly vaulted backwards, several feet away from Asgore. She landed on one knee, raised her staff, cocked her arm back, and let it fly with all her might. Asgore only had time to look surprised as the end of the staff hit him square between the eyes. He tumbled over backwards, and Undyne’s staff landed next to him.

Undyne felt shock. She actually hit him! Then she felt regret. Did she hurt him? Oh no. She shouldn’t have thrown it so hard. She ran over to him.

“Aw, dang! I’m sorry. I’m sorry! Are you okay?”

Asgore groaned and opened his eyes. He was seeing double for a few seconds, but he managed to focus on Undyne’s concerned face looking down at him. Then he did something Undyne wasn’t expecting. He started laughing, loudly.

“Huh? Did I knock you silly?” Undyne look puzzled.

“Ah ha ha ha! You did it! You beat me! Very good!”

“Oh…I...guess I did, didn’t I?” Her face slowly started to shift into a wide smile. “Yeah! I did!” she pumped her fist in the air.

“Help me up, please.”

“Oh, yeah. Sorry.” Undyne grabbed Asgore under the arm and hauled him back to his feet. Asgore brushed the dust off of his pants. He turned to Undyne and placed two heavy hands on her shoulders.

“Undyne, I’m very proud of you. You’ve grown into a strong, capable warrior. You’ve traveled a long way and worked very hard to get here.”

Undyne’s face turned a bit red. “Aw...thanks, Asgore.” She looked a bit concerned. “So, is that it? Is my training over?”

“Oh ho! Not by a long shot. You beat me once. That does not mean I don’t have more to teach you. And you never really stop learning. Remember that. You will still come to me for training on your days off, but I think we can call it a day this time, at least.”

Undyne looked relieved. “Oh! Okay. That’s good. I actually kind of look forward to...wait, days off?”

“Ah! Yes. I almost forgot to make it official. Come with me.”

They both put their staves back on the rack, and Undyne followed Asgore upstairs. She was still trying to figure out what he meant when he made his way to the living room. He flipped through some of the books on the shelf, and after a minute, pulled out a dusty piece of paper. It was folded over, and a wax blob bearing the royal seal was barely keeping it shut. It was obvious that this letter was a couple years old. He turned towards Undyne stood straight and formally, and presented her with the letter. Undyne looked at Asgore curiously. She took the letter and ran her finger under the fold, breaking the seal. She opened the letter and read.

“I, Asgore Dreemuur, in my capacity as king of all monsters under the mountain, hereby formally offer Undyne of the Waterfall the position of Knight of the Royal Guard, along with all benefits, equipment, and compensation formally entitled to the position, effective immediately as of the presentation of this letter to the Knight Captain of the Royal Guard.”

The King’s flowing signature covered the bottom of the letter.

Undyne first felt a pang of embarrassment. The “Undyne of the Waterfall” was just to make the whole “Challenge the King to a Duel” thing more dramatic when she was a kid. But her expression slowly shifted to shock and then to glee as the rest of the letter sank in.

“The Royal Guard? Really?!”

“Yes. I am offering the position to you. Do you accept?”

“You bet I do! Thank you! I’m gonna be the best Royal guard you ever had.” She lept in the air and then wrapped her arms around Asgore, giving him a crushing hug. Asgore looked surprised for a second, before smiling and patted her on the back.

“No need to thank me. You more than earned it.” Asgore said as Undyne stepped back and tried to stealthy wipe her eyes. “Now. Why don’t you get cleaned up and make yourself look presentable before you go meet the captain."

"Will do!"

Chapter Text

Undyne took to her new job like...well...a fish to water, but it turned out that being a Royal Guard was actually pretty uneventful. Monsters were, for the most part, kindhearted and nonviolent. She mainly patrolled different parts of the underground in her official armor, looking for any signs of humans.

She still trained with Asgore at least once a week, honing her skills as well as she possibly could. When she was at home, she trained on a dummy in front of her house. She needed to stay sharp and be constantly vigilant. You never know when something might happen. You never know when another human might show up.

Undyne occasionally wandered around the garbage dump south of her home. She found some interesting things there, sometimes. One day, she was looking for some new weapons to try out when she wandered over to the abyss, a huge hole in the ground where water from the surface flowed. A lot of the garbage from the surface actually came in through here, so this is where she like to look for new things.

She actually did find something new. A short, yellow monster in a dingy lab coat was standing on a platform near the edge of the waterfall. She was carefully leaning over the edge of the platform, staring into the abyss and looking thoughtful. Curious, Undyne waded through the water towards them. On closer inspection, Undyne thought she was actually kind of pretty in a bookish sort of way. Whoever it was must have been deep in thought, because Undyne managed to get right up next to them without them noticing.

“Where do you think it goes?” Undyne asked her. The monster yelped, spun around, and had to lean her head back to look Undyne in the face. Undyne gave her a toothy grin, and the monster got a funny expression and went red in the face. Undyne thought she looked nervous. She realized she was flashing her chompers at the poor thing, so she closed her mouth and tried to look non-threatening.

“I-I-I…” Alphys felt her chest tighten up. She wasn’t expecting anyone to be out here, let alone someone so tall and strong and good looking. Faced with a question and excess sensory input, her brain immediately defaulted into scientist mode. “...I...it’s hard t-to say. My b-b-best theory is that it follows a...a trail eroded through the softer rock. From the general makeup of the rock under the mountain there’s a good chance that…” And the words started to tumble from her mouth. She talked about geological makeup and tectonic activities and...much to Alphys’ surprise, this tall, beautiful warrior women actually listened. She wasn’t just being polite either. She prodded her along with questions and asked for clarification and...it felt nice. It made Alphys feel more like a scientist again, and less like a complete and miserable failure. Soon they were both sitting on the platform, dangling their feet in the water.

“...there’s also a theory that the cave system was here first, and that the water simply made its way to the lowest possible elevation here by chance. I don’t really subscribe to that theory, since if you look at the weathering on the rocks overhead…”

Alphys pushed on as long as she could. She figured if she could keep talking, this lady would stay and listen and keep her company. In time though, Alphys simply ran out of things to say.

“...It c-could also be a result of volcanic activity. And this...this could be an old magma vent. That’s unlikely, though. I don’t...don’t think this area has every been very active in th-that sense. Uh...that’s...that’s all I have.” Alphys shrugged helplessly as she sputtered to a stop.

Undyne smiled. “Hey, you’re smart! How did you come up with all that just by looking at a big hole?”

Alphys shrugged. “I...I’m the royal scientist. It’s my job to look at things...and...and...” Alphys slowly went quiet when she realized what she just said. She braced herself and waited for the questions, and the accusations, and the anger.

“Really? I didn’t even know we had a royal scientist.” Undyne said.

Alphys felt relief wash over her. This was too good to be true.

“What kind of stuff do you do?” Undyne asked.

And there it was. If sounded too good to be true, it probably was.

“N...n...nothing very in-interesting. Heh! Mainly stud-studying...things like...specific types of grasses at the waterfall...and…uh...studying...human...uh...culture...It depends on...on what the k-k-king wants me to work on.”

“Oh.” Undyne looked down into the abyss. “Does Asgore want you to study something about this big hole? Kind of dangerous, don’t you think?”

Alphys shook her head. “No. I was just...thinking.”

“About what?”

Alphys went quiet for a long time. What was she supposed to say? That she was thinking about how she failed Asgore, and who knows how many others monsters? That she was here at the garbage dump because that’s where trash belonged? That she wished she could just...disappear forever?

“I was thinking about how...garbage...flows down here, and into the abyss. It falls deep, deep down to...who knows where. And then it’s gone, and forgotten.” Alphys said quietly.

Undyne looked at Alphys for a few seconds, and then down into the pit. “Yeah. It kinda sucks. I’ll bet there’s some great stuff down there no one even knows about."

"R-really?"

"Yeah! I mean, you can find some really cool things out here if dig around enough. It kinda makes you wonder what you missed out on.”

Alphys was strangely quiet now. Undyne felt a bit embarrassed. How long had she been bothering her for now? Must have been hours. She kept on prodding her with questions about the rocks and stuff, and probably made her go on a lot longer than she had to.

“Hey, I should get going.” Undyne said, standing up. “Sorry I kept you here so long.”

“N-no! It’s fine! Really. I...enjoyed talking about...you know...things.” Alphys smiled nervously.

“Well, hey. I’m around here a lot. Maybe we’ll run into each other again, right?” Undyne said. She really hoped so. This little nerd was actually really freakin’ adorable.

“Y...yeah. Maybe.”

“Awesome! See you around.” Undyne gave her a little wave and started to walk away.

Alphys watched Undyne as she made her way across the stream to and back to dry land. She was really pretty, with her red hair, and strong arms, and those teeth that made Alphys' spine tingle in ways she would never admit to anyone. Someone like that was obviously way out of her league, but...she really seemed to like to listen to Alphys. Maybe...

It felt like the sound of the water falling and flowing into the abyss was trying to drown out her thoughts.

Maybe we’ll run into each other again.

Alphys pulled herself up and started to run after Undyne.

“W-Wait!” Alphys shouted. Undyne turned around and looked at her quizzically.

“I...I never got your...I...my name is...Alphys.” She panted.

Undyne gave a little smile. “I’m Undyne. Nice to meet you, Alphys.”

“Y-yeah. Likewise.”

***

“Ow!”

The next day, Undyne was training with Asgore and it wasn’t going very well. That was the third time in as many minutes that Asgore landed a blow on her. Asgore sighed and put down his sword and shield, while Undyne rubbed her arm where the wooden sword smacked her.

“If that was a real battle, your arm would be gone.” Asgore chided gently.

“I know! I know. I’m a little out of it today.” Undyne said defensively.

“You’re distracted. Would you like to tell me what’s wrong?”

“Uh...you have a royal scientist, right? Um...Alphys?”

Asgore looked concerned. “Yes. Why do you ask?”

“I ran into her yesterday. We chatted a bit.”

“About what?”

Undyne shrugged. “Rocks and stuff. She’s really smart. I dunno. I’d like to talk to her more, but she’s kind of jumpy and I’m...well...kind of scary looking.”

Asgore sighed. “Yes, well, I am concerned about Dr. Alphys. I believe that something troubles her, but she will not tell me about it. It may be that she could use a friend.”

Undyne looked thoughtful. Alphys seemed so nervous and jumpy, but when she got to talking about science stuff, she suddenly got focused and passionate and Undyne found it really endearing. she found herself wondering how else Alphys could be passionate. Well, maybe it was better to take this one step at a time. Undyne hardly knew anything about her, let alone if what her romantic preferences were.

“Is there something else you wanted to talk about?” Asgore said after a long silence.

“Do you happen to know if Alphys prefers…”

Oh my God are you seriously about to ask this person who is technically your boss if another one of his employees is gay? You don't even know how many rules that would break.

“...uh...spaghetti or pizza? I figured we could, you know, grab something to eat. Hang out. Chat about...whatever. Friend stuff.” Undyne smiled nervously.

“Well, I do recall seeing her eating noodles a few times.” Asgore said thoughtfully.

“Great! Spaghetti it is then.”

***

Undyne wandered the garbage dump more often, and it seemed like every time she was there, she would run into Alphys. They usually met near the abyss. It sort of became a thing. Then they walked together, looking for swords, books, clothes, dvds, whatever might be neat or useful. Whenever they were together, they talked. Sometimes they talked about whatever they would find. Sometimes Alphys talked about whatever Undyne could get her to start talking about for hours at a time. Sometimes they talked about each other.

Undyne was poking around a rather tall pile of trash, and Alphys was sorting through some dvds she had found.

“So...what’s it like being a royal guard?” Alphys asked.

“Eh. Pretty boring actually. Mainly a lot of patrolling in hot, stuffy armor, looking scary so people won’t try anything. We’re supposed to keep an eye out for humans, too, but there hasn’t been one down here in years. Haven’t fought any bad guys. Haven’t heroically saved anyone’s life. It's super lame.”

“M-maybe you have...and just don’t know it.” Alphys shuffled her feet.

“That’s a nice thought.” Undyne said, barreling right through the hint without noticing. “Still, if it weren’t for the training sessions with Asgore, I’d probably go nuts.”

“You...you train with King Asgore?” Alphys tried to push down the terror that was welling up in her gut.

“Yeah! I never told you?” Undyne turned around and slid down to the bottom of the garbage pile. She stood in front of Alphys and gave her best and most official Royal Guard pose, with capital letters and everything. “I mean, I don’t like to brag, but he trained me every since I was a kid! I’m probably almost as strong as he is!”

Alphys didn’t doubt it. She once saw Undyne effortlessly pick up a fridge and toss it a good twenty feet. Alphys needed to pour cold water over her head to calm down after that.

“D-d-did...did he ever m-mention...you know...stuff I’ve been...working on?” Alphys asked, not able to look at Undyne.

Undyne looked a bit embarrassed. She didn’t want Alphys to know that she was asking about her. She needed to play this cool.

“Oh...uh...I never really thought to ask. Sorry about that.”

Alphys started breathing again.

“Oh! Th-that’s okay. It’s...it’s p-probably for the best.” She said.

“Why’s that?”

“Ah! I...uh...that is to say...it’s...t-top secret!” Alphys blurted out. “Yeah! I-I could get in big trouble for talking about it. Even...even with a member of the Royal Guard.”

Undyne looked genuinely impressed. “Woah. So like, high tech weapons? Super strong armor?”

“Something like that.” Alphys shoved the DVDs she wanted to keep in her coat. “I uh...think that’s all for me. Are you ready to go?”

“Just a minute, I think there’s something big under here.” Undyne turned her attention back to the pile of garbage she was digging around in earlier. Undyne started tossing pieces of garbage over to the side.

“Let’s see...bottle, another bottle, old phone, some kind of purple, wobbly thing, 101 skeleton jokes, ah-ha!”

Alphys raised an eyebrow when she heard a musical note.

“Awesome! A piano!” Undyne brushed some more garbage off of the top, revealing a shiny, black, wood surface. “Looks like a baby grand. Man, how did this get down here in one piece?”

“You...can you play?” Alphys asked.

“Yeah! I used to play all the time. I bet you I can…just...pull here and...” Undyne found a handhold somewhere under the keyboard and pulled. The piano slid out from under the pile of garbage, and the mound collapsed in on itself. She ducked under the piano, grunted, and stood up, lifting the whole thing over her head.

“Okay! Now, I’m ready. Let’s go.”

Alphys’ eyes looked like saucers. “Y…y...you’re going to c-carry that...all the way back to your house? How m-much does that weigh?”

“Dunno. Feels like about six-fifty?” Undyne gently rocked the piano over her head, testing the weight. “Eh, probably closer to six hundred.”

“I want you.” Alphys gasped, turning red. “To...uh...play me...something...sometime.”

“Sure.” Undyne shrugged, which was fairly impressive by itself, considering the circumstances “Probably won’t be tonight, though. I still have to tune it.”

“Oh. Th-that’s fine.”

“Great! Let’s...whoa!” Undyne wobbled a bit, but regained her balanced. “Let’s roll. Follow me.” She started off in the direction of her house. Alphys grabbed a paper bag off of the closest trash pile, put it to her mouth, took several deep breaths , and then set off after Undyne.

They arrived at Undyne’s house fairly quickly. Undyne grunted as she lowered the piano onto the ground outside of her house, and then she groaned and arched her back to crack it. Alphys made a funny noise.

“Ug...I’m getting out of shape” Undyne said. Then realized that Alphys was right here, at her house. This would be a good time to make her move. She turned to Alphys and clapped her hands. “Hey! You should stay for dinner! I’m making spaghetti with my special hand-made sauce.”

“I-I-uh...I mean…” Alphys stammered.

“It’s cool. I’ll wash my hands first.”

“It’s not...that...I...oh...okay. Sure! I’m actually pretty hungry.” Alphys nodded quickly.

“Awesome. Come in! Me fish casa es su fish casa or whatever.”

Undyne's house wasn’t what Alphys was expecting, although she wasn’t sure what she was expecting. Maybe something like a barracks with swords and armor everywhere, or at least a bearskin rug that Undyne made herself after suplexing the bear to death. This was actually pretty bright and clean and open. There was a table with chairs, a tile floor, and some pretty high end kitchen utensils. As Alphys sat down at the table, she noticed that there was a little fish doily in the middle, and she definitely wasn’t expecting that. Alphys set the stack of DVDs on the table to look through.

Alphys jumped and looked up when she heard a wet thud. She really, really wasn’t expecting Undyne to smash the vegetables for the sauce with her fists. It looks like she wasn’t kidding when she said hand made. It was a bit alarming, but she did wash her hands earlier, so Alphys didn’t feel like she had a reason to complain. Undyne put a pot of water on the stove, dumped a box of spaghetti in, stirred it like she had a grudge against all things pasta, and turned the burner way, way up.

Undyne didn’t do anything halfway, it seemed. Alphys didn’t know watching someone make spaghetti could be so hot. Figuratively and literally.

“Uh...don’t you think that flame is a bit...high?”

“Nah, go big or go home, I say.” Undyne said dismissively. She walked to the table, pulled out a chair and fell into it. To Alphys’ horror, Undyne picked up one of her dvd cases to look at it.

“What’s this? Looks like a cartoon or something.”

“It’s-It’s...uh...how...I...study...uh...human c-culture and...interactions.” Alphys said, mind racing.

“So, what? It’s like human history? But as a cartoon?”

“Y-yeah! Exactly! It’s called Anime because it’s uh...animated re-enactments of historical events.” Alphys said stiffly. She felt bad for lying, but Undyne couldn’t know that she just liked silly cartoons and comics.

“Hmp. Humans are lame. Why would you want…” Undyne took a closer look at the case she was holding “Woah! Humans had giant robots? Okay, that’s actually kind of cool.”

“Hahaha! Yeah! Uh...it’s a lesser known...fact about...humans. They...uh...they also had...uh…” Alphys flipped through some of the disks she had stacked up “...uh...let’s see...oh! Here’s some depictions of ancient human weapons.” Alphys handed the case to Undyne, who snatched it eagerly out of her hands. Undyne’s eyes lit up like it was Christmas morning.

“Dang! This guy’s sword is bigger than he is!”

“Yeah! I’ve heard of this one.” Alphys trotted around to the other side of the table so she could look at the case along with Undyne. “So, it’s about a human mercenary who lived a long time ago. Now the mercenary is searching for his sister who was kidnapped by a powerful human that could turn into a giant bird and…”

Undyne wasn’t focusing on the conversation. She was only really thinking about how cute Alphys was when she was really into something. She talked a million miles a minute and just became so...animated and happy. Undyne lost track of time

“...and so the mercenary came to this tower with no door. He ended up using this scroll he got from a wandering merchant to cast a spell...do you smell something burning?” Alphys sniffed

“Hmm?” Undyne said with a lazy grin on her face. It shifted to a look of horror like someone flipped a switch.

“The spaghetti!” Undyne turned around to see smoke coming out of the pot. She ran over to the stove, leaving behind a trail of cursing that made Alphys turn red. Undyne grabbed the handles of the pot, jerked her hands back, picked a hand towel out of the sink, and then used that to take the pot off the burner.

“Okay. Maybe...maybe this isn’t a total loss!" Undyne said desperately. "Next we drain the water. There’s...there’s no water left. So, uh, let’s plate it!” Undyne pulled a plate out of the cupboard and set it on the kitchen counter. She held the pot over the plate and tipped it over. Nothing came out. She turned it upside down. Still nothing. Undyne shook the pot vigorously. With a sad popping sound, a black, tangled lump fell onto the plate.

Alphys had a look of blank horror on her face. She was pretty sure the plate cracked. Was she going to hurt Undyne’s feelings if she didn’t want to eat it? Was that tomato sauce on the ceiling? What was happening with her life?

Undyne set the pot in the wet sink, where it hissed and sent out a little wisp of steam. She turned towards Alphys with a embarrassed smile.

“So...uh...I actually don’t feel like spaghetti for some, weird reason, but I know this place in Snowdin does amazing cheese fries!”

Chapter Text

A few months later, Undyne and Alphys were sitting at the MTT-Brand Burger Emporium. They had just come back from New Home, where Alphys had shown Undyne the wonders of the manga section of the bookstore. On their way back to Alphys’ lab in the hotlands with a stack of “historical narratives”, Undyne insisted they stop here for lunch when she saw a sign for the Legendary Hero sandwich.

“I can’t believe that have a sandwich shaped like a sword!” Undyne said, unwrapping her meal.

“You don’t even know what’s in it.” Alphys said, picking the sequins off of her burger. This is what happens when a robot who’s never eaten before tries to market food.

“I don’t even care, I’m starving. Hey, Alphys, check it out. I’m a sword-swallower!” Undyne took a big bite out of her sandwich. Alphys giggled.

“Well, I appreciate you coming with me. I’m sorry you got kicked out of the bookstore.” Alphys said.

“Wasn’t your fault. If that guy wasn’t calling you names, I wouldn’t have had to toss him through the Self-Help section.” Undyne said. She didn’t even know what a “weeaboo” was, but she didn’t like the way he said it.

“It’s okay, Undyne. I’m used it it.” Alphys said calmly.

“No way! You deserve better than that, Alphys.” Undyne pointed at her. “If anyone starts giving you grief for liking anime or comics or whatever, you call me and I’ll be there faster than you can say ‘flying elbow drop’.”

“Heh. I’ll...I’ll keep that in mind.” Alphys had to look away as she started blushing again.

After they finished their meal, they left the resort and headed south. As soon as she stepped into the Hotlands, Undyne felt the oppressive heat bearing down on her again. By the time they even made it to the elevators, Undyne felt like she needed a drink.

“Ug, I hate this place.” Undyne said as she smacked the button to call the elevator. She realized that Alphys was getting red in the face again.

“What?” Undyne looked down. She was pretty sweaty, and her black shirt was getting soaked. “Oh, yeah. Sorry.” She pulled the wet fabric away from her skin. “Kind of gross, I know, but-”

“It’s-It’s okay!” Alphys said. “I w-was just, uh, thinking that-”

She was cut off as the elevator door opened. A royal guard tumbled out, almost knocking the both of them over.

“Woah! Hey! Where’s the fire?” Undyne said in an annoyed tone.

“Un...huff...Undyne! What are you doing here?!” the guard said, out of breath.

Undyne look puzzled. “I’m off the clock, dude. What’s wrong?”

“A human got underground! It’s almost here!”

Alphys squeaked. Undyne’s eyes went wide.

“A human?! Has anyone told the captain?”

“Captain's been dusted. The human got him when he tried to capture it.” The guard said.

Undyne looked grim. She heard that humans were dangerous. It looks like they weren’t kidding.

“Undyne, we have to get the king!” The guard said.

Undyne’s mind raced. The faster they got Asgore to deal with the human, the better, but it was almost here, and the resort was packed with monsters. The human already killed the guard captain. If it made it to the resort, who knows how many monsters it could kill before the king showed up.

Undyne looked at the guard. “You, go get Asgore.” The guard nodded and then ran off towards the resort. Undyne didn’t outrank him or anything, but she sounded like she knew what she was doing.

Undyne turned towards Alphys and put a hand on her shoulder. “Alphys, I need you to go to the resort and get them to tell everyone to get to a hotel room and lock the doors, then get yourself to a safe place. I’ll take care of the human.”

“But-but-but, Undyne!”

“Go, Alphys!” Undyne jabbed her finger at the retreating guard.

Alphys hesitated, swallowed loudly, and then started off as fast as she could. Undyne summoned her spear, turned, and smashed the control panel next to the elevator door. Now that the human couldn’t run away after it showed up, she fell back to open ground. She found a convenient rock, sat down, and waited.

She didn’t have to wait for long for the human to come around the corner. It had a large, cast iron frying pan and an apron that was dirty with food stains and gray dust. It looked surprised, but didn’t say anything to Undyne. She stood up and pointed her spear at the human.

“Stop right there!” Undyne yelled, and then she hesitated. What was she supposed to say? I’m Undyne, you killed my captain, prepare to die? We need your soul, sorry friend, nothing personal? She should have prepared something bad-ass sounding.

Whatever. Actions spoke louder than words. Undyne flipped the grip on her spear and hurled it at the human. To Undyne’s surprise, it didn’t even try to dodge. Instead, the human pointed the bottom of the frying pan at Undyne. The spear hit the pan with a loud, sharp sound, and dissipated.  Undyne growled and summoned another spear. And then another. And then another. She threw them one after the other, but the human stood its ground and deflected each throw with old, burnt pan.

This was going to require a little more strategy. Undyne decided to go mobile. She took off running to her left, trying to flank it. She summoned spears as fast as she could and threw them as they appeared. The human turned to face her as she ran, and deftly caught each spear with the pan.

This wasn’t working, and Undyne was getting tired. The heat and the exertion was getting to her. Facing it head on wasn’t working. What if…

Undyne stopped and summoned two more spears, one in each hand. She threw them one after the other. The human raised it’s frying pan, but the spears went wide and missed its head by a couple inches. Undyne reached out with her mind, made a gesture with her hand, turned the spears around and pulled them back in her direction. The human realized what was happening just a second too late. It turned around just in time to have both spears land right in its chest. The human tumbled onto its back, and the frying pan fell out of its hand and bounced away.

Now was her chance. Undyne knew that humans were tough, and she wanted to make sure it stayed down. She summoned another spear and sprinted towards the prone human. She lept in the air, grabbed her spear with both hands, plunged it deep into the human’s chest as she landed. Her spear went right through the human and buried itself in the earth.

It screamed, loudly. It grabbed Undyne’s spear and tried to pull it out, but she leaned on it to keep it down. She felt bad, despite herself. It was obviously in a lot of pain, and it looked terrified. She heard all the horror stories about how cruel humans were, but now that there was one in front of her, she felt a pang of sympathy. She leaned over.

“Sorry, buddy. Nothing personal.” she said quietly

It looked up at her, gasping, and choking on blood. It looked suprised. Then it looked angry.

The human reached up, grabbed the side of Undyne’s face, and plunged its thumb into her eye. It clamped onto her head, and twisted, and pulled. Undyne screamed and grabbed its wrist with one hand, keeping the spear in place with another.

Undyne knew that humans had incredibly powerful souls. That’s why she was doing this in the first place. She also knew that monsters, being mostly made up of their souls and magic, were vulnerable to negative emotions. Because of these two facts, a human with a butter knife and a grudge could cut through a monster easier than any sword.

This human was very, very mad. She was pretty sure that if she let go, it would tear her head clean off. Every square inch of her body was screaming at her to get this thing off of her and out of her eye, but if she pulled its hand away while it was still gripping her, she would just be helping it. She had to think fast.

Undyne used her free hand to grip her spear with all of her might and pulled, but between being buried into the dry earth and the human, the spear wasn’t moving. She wiggled the spear a bit. The human yelled and squeezed harder, and drove its thumb in deeper, and Undyne thought she was going to be sick from the pain.

Finally, she pulled the spear free, raised it up, and plunged it down into its chest again. The human still held on.

“Let!” She pulled it out again.

“Go!” She drove it down as hard as she could. The spear went through the human and sank deep into the hard earth.

Finally, the human loosed its grip. She pulled its hand off of her head, stumbled away, and put her hands on her face. She could feel the ash trickle down her cheek.

"That’s what I get for feeling sorry for a human." she thought, head swimming. "I try to be nice, and get an eye gouged out for my trouble."

Holding one hand over her injured eye, Undyne sat down heavily on the dirt. Between the blisteringly hot air and the pain in her head, she couldn’t focus. She felt so tired, and fell the rest of the way onto her back.

“I’m just...I’m just going to rest until Asgore gets here.” She said to...she wasn’t sure. Was the human still alive? Where was Alphys? Why was her mouth so dry?

“Would...someone...get some...water? Thanks…” She mumbled and darkness overtook her.

***

In her mind, Undyne saw herself and the human lying near each other dirt. She saw golden blossoms miraculously bloom from the barren, bloodstained dirt around the human. She heard cackling laughter, and then the blossoms withered, and died, and were gone.

***

Undyne opened her good eye, and felt that the other side of her face was covered in bandages. Instead of the cavern ceiling, she saw tiles and fluorescent lights. She grunted and started to sit up. Almost instantly she heard a clatter to her side and a yellow hand holding a glass of water popped into view. A bit of the water spilled onto Undyne from the rapid motion.

“Sorry! Sorry! I just…”

“Thanks, Alphys.” Undyne grabbed the glass and took a drink. She sat up the rest of the way and looked around. She was in a single hospital room, on a bed. Undyne only knew of a few small hospitals in the city. She also noticed that she was wearing one of those stupid paper gown things. Alphys was standing next to the bed, and behind her was a small end-table and an overturned chair. She had bags under her eyes.

“Uh...how long was I out?” Undyne asked.

“Oh...uh...a few hours.” Alphys said.

“How many’s a few?” Undyne asked suspiciously.

“Uh...twelve...ish?” Alphys smiled nervously. “It’s early morning.”

Undyne looked shocked. “What?! What happened? You weren’t here the whole time, were you?!”

“I...I slept!” Alphys said, panicked. It was technically true. Alphys nodded off for about an hour at one point. She nearly emptied the hospital vending machine of Undermountain Dew to prevent it from happening again. She really wanted to be there when Undyne woke up.

“I...uh...heard that King Asgore and some guards found you next to...the dead human. He, uh collected the human’s soul and then they carried you up here. I got here right after you did. They...they they cleaned you up and put you in a tub of cold water.” Alphys said. “You were really dehydrated.”

“Oh. Good.” Undyne said simply. At least they got a human soul out of this mess. “Well, that explains what happened to my clothes, at least. I hate these things. I feel naked” She said tugging at the paper gown.

Alphys turned red. Undyne pointed at the bandages on her face.

“Did they say anything about…”

Alphys cringed. “Th-they said that...m-m-most of it would heal...but...uh…”

“My eye’s gone.” Undyne said flatly.

“I’m sorry, Undyne.” Alphys said quietly “The...uh...there just wasn’t enough left to...”

Undyne sighed and shrugged. “Well, it is what it is. Just have to make sure it doesn’t happen again, right?” She grinned. “Besides, I bet I’ll look badass in an eyepatch, and it’s not like my face could get much scarier looking.”

“You’re not scary looking!” Alphys shot back sourly. “You look...I think you...look nice.” She faltered.

This time they both turned red. “Uh...thanks, Alphys. You’re not so bad yourself.”

“Heh...uh...th-thank you.”

***

The next day, Undyne was still at the hospital, but had recovered enough to be up and about again. Alphys had returned with a fresh change of clothes for Undyne. She didn’t want to leave in the first place, but Undyne insisted that she go get some proper sleep. By the time Alphys had walked in, Undyne had already taken off her bandages and was looking at herself in a mirror.

“Should you...uh...be taking those off already?”

“It was getting itchy.” Undyne said. She poked the skin around the empty eye socket gingerly. The skin on the side of her face and ear, where the human grabbed her was still gray and stiff.

“Jeeze. Looks like someone attacked me with a melon baller.” Undyne said.

“Oh my God don’t say stuff like that.” Alphys said, making a face.

“Sorry.” Undyne laughed. She turned and looked at Alphys. “Hey, what’s in the bag?”

“It’s...uh...just some clean clothes. I-I figured that...you’ve been...uh…”

“Aw, thanks Alphys.” Undyne cut her off, smiling. They were dragging their feet on getting her her clothes back, and the paper gown was getting on her nerves.

Alphys smiled back. They looked at eachother for a few seconds before Undyne gave her a teasing look.

“So, are you going to turn around or are you just gonna sit there and watch me get dressed?” She smirked.

“Oh! I didn’t...I-I wasn’t...I didn’t mean-” Alphys squeaked, spun around and screwed her eyes shut.

“Relax, I’m just teasing you. It’s cute when you get embarrased.” Undyne said.

Alphys grumbled. Platonic friends teased each other like this all the time, right? And called each other cute. There wasn’t any way someone as strong and cool and good looking as Undyne was interested in her, so there wasn’t really anything worth thinking about.

“Alright, you can turn around now.” Undyne said, now wearing an anime t-shirt and jeans.

“Oh!” Alphys said, remembering something. “Uh...I got...got this for you too.” She reached into her lab coat pocket, pulled out a small plastic bag, and handed it to Undyne. She turned it upside down and something black and square dropped into her hand. She turned it over and smiled when she realized what it was. Alphys went and picked up an eyepatch for her. She unwrapped the elastic band, slipped it over her head, and looked at herself in the mirror.

“I knew it. I look hardcore.” She said, admiring herself

“Yeah.” Alphys said, smiling.

***

Undyne walked out of the hospital with Alphys close behind her. The head of the hospital didn’t want to let Undyne go, and started to chastise her for taking off her bandages too early. Undyne made it clear that she was leaving now and that if he tried to stop her, it would be a good thing that he was already at the hospital. He changed his tune pretty quickly after that.

While Alphys went to look for the ‘historical comics’ they had bought before, Undyne went to see King Asgore. She had to travel to the throne room before she could find him.

The King sat on the throne in his official armor and cloak. Several royal guards stood in front of him, and they seemed to be discussing something. Asgore looked up in surprise when he noticed Undyne.

“Undyne! You should still be resting.” Asgore said. The other guards stopped their conversation and turned to look at her.

Undyne threw up her hands in frustration “I’ve been resting for, like, two days! I’m bored! Can we talk about what happened?”

Asgore sighed. He wished she would just sit still for a while. “Well, since you are already here…” Asgore motioned here to join the rest of the guards. Most of them were still watching her. She turned to the closest one.

“What? Have I got something on my face?” She said sharply.

“Uh...I...uh...like your shirt.” The guard stammered. Undyne looked down and realized that she was among a bunch of uniformed royal guard in an anime t-shirt.

“Oh. Thanks. A friend gave it to me.” Undyne stepped forward to join the crowd.

“So...what happened between you and the human?” Another guard asked.

Undyne smiled wickedly. She was looking forward to this.

Undyne told them the whole story, from running into the guard at the elevator, to sending Alphys to warn the resort, to actually fighting the human.

“...So I was running and throwing spears. Wham! Bam! Couldn’t get past that stupid frying pan. So then I got this awesome idea…”

She told about getting the human from behind, and jumping in to finish the job.

“...It was so cool. Spear went right through it, like, crunch! But, like, the human wasn’t all the way dead. So it gets super pissed that I just ran it through so he reaches up and…”

She went into detail about her life and death struggle with the human.

“...So I’m wiggling the spear to try and get it out, right? The human just squeezes harder and I can feel his thumb just, like, digging deeper in my-”

“Oh my god please stop.” Another guard gagged. Asgore nodded politely, but was looking rather pale.

“Pft. Wuss. Alright, fine. Anyway, I get the spear out stab it again and again and I’m yelling ‘Let go!’ and it finally loosens its grip enough where I could pull its hand off, and...well...I blacked out and…woke up in the hospital. Look, it was heat exhaustion. I was dehydrated, okay?!”

Asgore put his hand up. “Undyne, no one doubts your endurance. Such a wound would have killed many monsters outright. I am truly sorry about your injuries.” he said sadly.

Undyne shrugged. “Yeah, well, I got a spare. What I want to know is how the human got that far. How many monsters did it get to before I stopped it? What happened?”

“We do not know how many monsters we have lost. So far it seems that it was, thankfully, not many, but it is unfortunate that our esteemed Captain was among them.”

“It kept a low profile.” Another guard said. “Passed through Snowdin with hardly any trouble. It got a couple monsters at the waterfall and almost made it to the hotlands before the captain caught up to it. That’s where he got dusted.”

“Well why didn’t we catch it sooner?!” Undyne threw her hands up. “There’s the entire Snowdin forest and the town itself and no caught wind of it?

The guards looked at each other uncomfortably.

“Well...uh...that is…”

Asgore raised his hand. “These are fair questions. Do you have any ideas for how to prevent this from happening again?”

“Well...yeah, I got a few. Some checkpoints, cameras, you know? I figured I would talk to the new captain about it, when we got one.”

“Ah, yes.” Asgore folded his hands in front of him. “We were just discussing possible candidates for a new captain of the royal guard.”

Asgore stood up and addressed all the guards in the room.

“Esteemed guardsmen, in light of her dedication to protecting her fellow monsters, bravery in the face of a deadly and cruel enemy, and initiative to prevent a tragedy like this from happening again, I officially nominate Undyne as Knight Captain of the Royal Guard. All in favor?”

“Wait, wh-” Undyne started.

“Aye!” All the guards in the room yelled at once.

“All opposed?”

Silence fell over the room and Undye could only hear the blood pounding in her ears. Was this really happening? Most of the monsters in this room have been guards longer than she has, and they wanted her to lead them! Well, why not her? She was strong. She knew humans better than anyone else thanks to Alphys and her anime. She could yell at people. She was pretty sure that covered all the basics . Yeah! She could do this!

“It is unanimous, then.” Asgore said after a short silence. “Undyne, do you accept this nomination?”

Undyne stood at attention and nodded. “I won’t let you down, sir.”

“I have no doubt of this. It is settled. You will assume your new responsibilities in two weeks time, after which we will discuss your plans for human countermeasures in greater detail.”

“Thank you, King Asgore, but why two weeks? Is there, like, paperwork or something?”

“No, simply the matter that you still need time to rest and recover from your previous battle.”

Undyne started to protest, but Asgore cut her off.

“Two weeks, Undyne. If you attempt to enter the barracks before that, the royal guard are hereby under orders to eject you if necessary.”

Undyne looked around at the crowd in the throne room. They all stood silently. A few shifted their weight uncomfortably.

“...I think I could take ‘em.” Undyne put her hands up. “Alright, alright. Fine. Two weeks. I’ll be good.”

***

Undyne caught up with Alphys near the king’s house. As soon as Alphys noticed her, she held up a shopping bag triumphantly.

“I found them! I...uh...I left them at the hotel. How did the meeting with...uh...King Asgore go?”

“Well, good news and bad news. Good news is that I’m the new captain of the guard.”

“Whaaat?!” Alphys looked at her in shock. “Undyne, that’s amazing!”

“Yeah, I know, right?” Undyne grinned, then she looked uncomfortable. “Bad news is that they’re making me take two weeks of medical leave. What am I going to do for two weeks? I’m fine!”

Alphys didn’t want to point out that a good sized patch of the side of Undyne’s head was still gray. “Well, uh...w-w-we c-could, you know, stay at my place for a c-c-couple days...and...and watch anime or...or even read these!” Alphys held up her bag. “It could...you know...almost be like...like a sleepover. You know, if...if you want to.”

“Hm...yeah. Yeah! Why not?” Undyne like anime, but she wasn’t sure she could handle that much in one sitting. Spending some quality time with Alphys was a no-brainer, though.

“R-realy?! Great! I...uh...have this one anime that I really like. It’s called ‘Mew Mew Kissy Cutie’ and it’s about this human who really isn’t totally human because of her ears and she has these magic powers to…” Alphys rambled on as they walked towards the elevators out of New Home, and Undyne followed, nodding and smiling.

Chapter Text

A couple days after she had returned to her home at the waterfall (with a few disks from Alphys and a mental note to scrounge up a TV), she was training on the practice dummy outside of her house. It turned out that throwing spears with one eye was a bit different than with two. The dummy wasn’t helping.

“Useless. Useless! USELESS!” The dummy yelled as another spear sailed over its head.

“Shut up!” Undyne snapped back. She didn’t know who has possessed this stupid sack of fluff, Napstablook’s drunk uncle or something, but it got on her nerves. Oh well, at least she didn’t feel bad about hitting it.

“Ha! You couldn’t hit the broadside of a barn! You couldn’t hit the barn side of a broa-ARG!” The dummy was cut off after a spear smacked into its face and knocked it over.

“Ha, yourself, you mouthy pile of burlap!” Undyne said smugly. Undyne arched an eyebrow as she heard clapping over to her side. She turned to see Alphys standing there along with someone she didn’t recognize. He was tall, handsome in a very anime way, and...shiny?  He looked almost like he was made of plastic.

“Good throw, Darling!” He said, with a somewhat tinny voice. “Right in the kisser! It’s nice to see that old codger get put in his place.”

“Dramatic. Dramatic! DRAMA-”

“Quiet!” Undyne cut the dummy off again. She turned back to the tall stranger. “Sorry, don’t believe we’ve met.”

“Oh! Sorry, Undyne.” Alphys said. “This is a...friend of mine, Mettaton.”

“What, like that robot TV star?”

“The one and the same!” Mettaton said, taking a sweeping bow. “And you must be Undyne, esteemed Captain of the Guard. I’ve heard so much about you! Read quite a bit, as well.”

Alphys made a strangled noise and looked panicked.

“After all, you did make the newspaper.” Mettaton winked at Alphys. Alphys made a sour face back at Mettaton. Undyne wasn’t sure what kind of exchange just took place

“Well, I haven’t actually done any ‘captaining’ yet, since I’m still on forced medical leave.” Undyne said slowly.

“In any case, I’m not surprised you didn’t recognize me. You’re probably used to seeing me in my more utilitarian outfit.” Mettaton said

“I actually don’t watch TV.” Undyne said. “I’ve heard about you, but that’s about it.”

“You don’t?” Mettaton looked surprised and crestfallen all at once. “But, you’re missing out on so much! Me, on my hit cooking show! Me, giving you the latest news! Me, starring in classic broadway performances!”

Undyne noticed a pattern there, but she decided to play nice for Alphys’ sake. “Look, why don’t you guys come on in and take a load off for a bit?”

Alphys looked hesitant. “Well, uh…”

“Marvelous! We accept.” Mettaton said, beaming.

As the door shut behind them, Mettaton gasped and shot straight over to Undyne’s piano.

“Well, well, Captain, I didn’t take you for the musical type. Do you play?” He said, running his hand over the shiny, black wood.

Undyne looked exasperated. “No, I just keep it around because it goes with my shirt. Yes, I play! I’ve played ever since...I...was…” Undyne trailed off as Mettaton nimbly hopped up and lay across the top of the piano. He propped himself up on one elbow and ran his other hand seductively down his side.

“What do you think? Does this pose capture my good side? Oh, who am I kidding? All of my sides are good.” He said, winking.

Undyne pointed at Mettaton and gave Alphys a puzzled look.

“We...ah...we were just taking his new chassis out for a...a test run.”  Alphys just shrugged helplessly.

“New chassis?” Undyne asked.

“Of course!” Mettaton said. “Dr Alphys’ talented hands have been hard at work on my body.”

Undyne looked at Mettaton with a wide-eyed, slightly hostile expression. 

“P-p-please...don’t...say it l-like that.” Alphys said, turning red.

Mettaton looked at Alphys, and then Undyne, and then back at Alphys.

“Oh! Right.” Mettaton winked at Alphys. “Don’t mind me, darlings. I’ll just sit here and...look pretty.” Mettaton leaned back and pulled a bunch of grapes out of a hatch in his chassis. Alphys hid her face and groaned.

“You built this guy a new body?” Undyne said, looking impressed.

Alphys nodded. “I built the old one too, but that was more of a...proof of concept.”

“Sturdy, yes, but so hard to tailor for.” Mettaton said. He held the bunch of grapes over his head and lowered it until he could pick the bottom grape off with his teeth.

“Huh.” Undyne rubbed her chin, looking thoughtful. Alphys was smart, and she obviously knew her way around electronics. “Say, Alphys. Do you think you could help me set up some cameras around Snowdin forest?”

“Uh...well...sure. What for?”

“For surveillance!” Undyne said. “If another human comes down here, I want to know about it as soon as possible and I want to know what it’s doing. Then we can cut it off before it can hurt anyone.”

“Well, yeah, that should be easy enough.” Alphys said. “I can connect them to the monitors in my lab. That way, if another human comes down here, I can keep you up to date in real time.”

“Great! You’re a genius, Alphys.” Undyne grinned.

“Ahaha...Uh...well...I...I’m not...all...” Alphys stammered bashfully.

“Oh, don’t be so modest, Doctor.” Mettaton said. “You built me, after all.”

“Well, um...yeah. I guess I did.” Alphys nodded, breaking into a small smile.

“Uh...right.” Undyne said. She really didn’t know what to make of Mettaton. She felt like he could flirt with someone just by sitting still very still in the same room as them. It made her scales itch.

Alphys suddenly looked at Undyne with concern. “Should you really be worrying on this now? Didn’t Asgore say you weren’t allowed to work?”

“No. He said that I wasn’t allowed in the barracks.” Undyne said as-a-matter-of-factly. “He didn’t say what I could or couldn’t do on my time off. And what I’m doing is putting together a surveillance plan.”

“Well, I’d be happy to help.” Alphys smiled.

“Awesome! Thanks, Alphys. You’re the best.” Undyne said, making Alphys smile even wider. “That just leaves me with recruiting more guards for checkpoints. Do you think I should put an add out? Maybe a fancy poster? ‘Undyne wants you to join the royal guard’ or something like that? Didn’t humans used to do posters with pinup girls?”

“Oooh, I can help with that!” Mettaton said, throwing the empty bundle of grape stems away. He slid off the top of the piano with inhuman grace.

“What, being a pinup?” Undyne said.

“Good idea, but no. I was thinking that you could-”

“I'm not going to be the pin up." Undyne cut him off.

“Why not?" Alphys asked before she realized it. She clamped her hands over her mouth.

Mettaton held a finger up. “Let me finish, darlings. I was thinking that you could write a recruitment message, and I’ll read it during the six o’clock news.”

“Hmm…” Undyne rubbed her chin. “Yeah, I think that’ll work.”

“Great!” Mettaton smiled. “Now if you’ll just write down what you-” Mettaton was cut off by a loud beeping sound. He looked at a screen on his wrist. “Oh dear, I hate to cut this short, but my battery is getting low.” Mettaton sighed.  “Alphys, darling, we really need to do something about this battery. It’s not nearly enough time.”

“I’m...I’m looking into what’s causing the excess drain. I’ll figure it out soon. I promise.” Alphys turned to Undyne. “Sorry, Undyne. I need to head back to the lab.”

“Hmp, well, okay. But...uh...call me when you get there, alright?” Undyne said.

Alphys nodded and walked to the door. Mettaton winked at Undyne.

“I bet she quite enjoys you looking out for her like that.” He said, and then followed Alphys out the door, leaving a bemused Undyne to mull over what just happened.

***

“Are you sure that’s the same guy?” Undyne said. They were at Alphys’ place a few days later, watching the news on her over-sized monitor. “I mean, I know they say the camera adds 10 pounds, but this is ridiculous!”

“That body was built with...ah...function over form in mind.” Alphys shrugged. The truth was that it was built nice and sturdy to fight humans. Alphys had wanted to impress King Asgore. 

“Hmm.” Undyne watched the screen. The old, boxy Mettaton was standing behind a desk, holding some papers in his hands and wearing a necktie somehow wrapped around it’s body in a sad attempt to make him look more professional.

“And now, the weather.” Mettaton said, harsh, beeping voice “We are underground. There is no weather.” He threw one of the pieces of paper in his hand off-screen. “Next up, you may have seen last week’s story about Undyne, the heroic guardsfish turned Captain."

"Guardsfish?" Undyne arched her eyebrow.

"Well, now Undyne wants you,” Mettaton pointed to the camera. “to join the royal guard! Now you too can uphold the law, have access to top-notch equipment, take part in heroic battle against the scourge that is humanity!”

“Scourge that is humanity?” Alphys looked at Undyne with a puzzled expression. Undyne looked even more bewildered.

“Heroic? Scourge? Top notch equipment?” Undyne turned to Alphys and pointed accusingly at the screen. “I didn’t tell that stupid, prima-donna washing machine to say any of that! I just want some sentries!”

“If you think you have what it takes,” Mettaton continued. “Come down to Undyne’s residence at the Waterfall, just west of the Blook snail farm. Up next, a feel good story about a monster child born without any arms.”

Alphys turned the screen off and Undyne dragged her hand down her face.

“Uh...w-w-well...he just p-probably wanted to make it sound, you know, more exciting. Punchy.” Alphys said

“I’ll show him ‘punchy’. Next time I see that guy, we’re going to find out just how sturdy he is.” Undyne grumbled through her hand.

“Oh dear…”

***

The next day, Undyne had a number of applicants. She was sitting at her living room table with the first one.

“Okay, Doggo, why should I hire you for the sentry position?” Undyne asked, trying to keep an air of professionalism. 

“I’m good at seeing moving things, and hitting them!” Doggo said excitedly.

“Any weaknesses?”

“Not so good at seeing things that aren’t moving.”

“Seriously?” Undyne said. She crumpled a piece of paper into a ball. “Hit this.” She said, and threw it at him. Doggo deftly swatted it out of the air. Undyne did this a few more times, throwing high and low, and Doggo hit each one.

“Well, alright then.” Undyne said. She had a lot of positions to fill, and he came with his own weapons. If humans could get by a checkpoint without moving, they had bigger problems on their hands. Undyne put a form on the table in front of Doggo and held out a pen.

“Sign here.”

Doggo grabbed the pen and looked at the table with a puzzled expression. He turned his head, trying to see it from different angles. Undyne sighed, reached across the table and jiggled the paper with her hand, making Doggo jump in surprise. He put his hand down on the form and signed his name, nowhere near the signature line. Undyne took the form, stamped it, and threw it in a box.

“You’ll be stationed at checkpoint Epsilon. Keep an eye out for humans and stop them if you see any. Any questions?” Undyne said.

“Is smoking on duty allowed?”

“No.”

***

“Dogamy and Dogaressa, right? Usually, I only talk to one applicant at a time.” Undyne said to the pair of dogs sitting across from her. They were holding eachother’s hands.

“We go everywhere together.” Dogaressa said.

“That’s right.” Dogamy said.

“Well, fine. I have a couple sentry stations right next to eachother. Why should I hire you two?”

“We work well together.” Dogamy said

“We have our own axes.” Dogaressa said.

“We have an excellent sense of smell.” Dogamy said

Undyne looked suspicious. “Excellent, huh? Can’t just take your word for that.”

“You had bacon, eggs, and yellow flower tea for breakfast.” Dogaressa said.

“You haven’t washed your jeans in days.” Dogamy said.

“You use lavender-scented, color-depositing shampoo for red hair and extra-strength de-”

“Okay, okay! Fine! You convinced me. Shut up.” Undyne waved her hands to stop them. She grabbed two forms and put them in front of the pair. “Sign here, and keep your noses out of my business.”

***

“Name, please.”

“Woof.”

Undyne looked up from the form in front of her to see a short, white dog standing across the table from her. She sighed and leaned her head on her hand.

“Look, buddy. I need to fill out this form.” Undyne tapped on the piece of paper in front of her. “So if you’re serious about this, stop fooling...around...and…” Undyne trailed off as the dog craned its head to get a better look at the form. It stretched it’s neck. And stretched. And stretched further. Undyne leaned away from the table in mild horror as its head slowly made its way across the table. Around the time the dog’s head was directly above the form, Undyne yelped as her chair tipped over backwards. The dog peered over the edge of the table at her and made a concerned, whining noise.

“Just...just...fill it out yourself!” Undyne said from the floor.

***

Undyne heard the next one coming before she saw it. The rhythmic thudding of footsteps made ripples in the mug of tea she had made for herself. Finally, the door opened, and a huge dog, clad in armor, ducked down to get through her doorway. It stomped over to the table and sat down, making the chair creak under the weight. It gave Undyne a friendly smile.

“Uh...name please?” She said, still staring at the huge dog.

“WOOF.”

Undyne straightened her hair back out and re-adjusted her eyepatch. She started frantically filling out the form, and when she was finished, slid it over in front of the dog and held the pen out.

“You’re in. Sign at the bottom.”

The dog, much smaller than Undyne realized, hopped out of the massive suit of armor, presses its paw into the ink pad next to Undyne’s stamp, and pressed the paw onto the signature line. The dog hopped back into the armor, and the whole ensemble stood up, saluted, and walked back out the door.

Undyne, mouth still hanging open, dropped the pen she was holding. She fumbled for the stamp, smacked it onto the form, and threw the form in the box. Then she gently set her head down on the table, thanking a number of deities that was the last applicant.

***

It was late at night, and Undyne was fast asleep in her bed. It had been a tiring day, and she was currently having a very pleasant dream about saving Alphys from some evil, but familiar looking, anime robot. She had sheathed her magic metal cutting sword and was leaning in for her reward smooch.

She jerked awake at a loud banging sound.

Undyne groaned and rubbed her eyes, trying to figure out what was happening. The banging sound started up again, and she realized that someone was at her front door. She dragged herself to her feet and, still clad in just a t-shirt and fishbone-print boxers, and zombie walked to the front door. She pulled it open and saw a tall skeleton stood in the door frame with a big smile on his face. Was he smiling? It’s hard to tell with skeletons.

“Hi!” He said chipperly. “I, the great Papyrus, have heard your summons and wish to join the Royal Guard!

“Wh-wha?” Undyne said sleepily.

“I would be a great addition to the Royal Guard! I can do everything that those dogs you already hired can do.”

Undyne stared at Papyrus blankly.

“I can prove it to you! I can fetch something for you! Or shake your hand! Want to see me roll over?” Papyrus said eagerly.

“Buddy, do you even know what ti-” Undyne started

“I can lick your face!”

Papyrus was almost knocked backwards as Undyne slammed the door shut. Undyne locked and bolted the door, stomped back to her bedroom, flopped back down on the bed, and buried her head under a pillow.

***

The next day, Undyne’s medical leave was finally up, to her relief. Even after being woken up in the middle of the night, she was up and ready to greet the day. She carefully put on her polished armor, put her helmet under her arm, opened the front door, and nearly walked right into Papyrus.

“Hi!” Papyrus waved cheerfully. “It sure takes you a long time to put your armor on. Can you sign me up now that you’re in uniform?”

Undyne looked gobsmacked when she realized it was the same skeleton from last night, except now there was another, shorter one standing next to him. The shorter one had blue hoodie and bedroom slippers. He had his hands in his pockets.

“What-what are you doing back here?! Who’s this guy?” Undyne sputtered, pointing at the shorter skeleton.

“Oh, this is my brother, Sans. He just woke up from a really long nap. Lazybones.” Papyrus said with a bit of a sour tone.

“Hey.” Sans waved. “Just here for moral support. My brother's always wanted...tibia royal guard” Sans grinned.  

“Stop helping!” Papyrus snapped at Sans. He turned back to Undyne. “And, I didn’t come back. I can’t come back if I never left!”

Undyne looked at him suspiciously. “You mean to tell me that you stood out here all night? Why?”

“Because I really, really, really want to join the Royal Guard!” Papyus said with a pleading look on his face.

Undyne’s expression softened and she sighed. “Well, you're determined. I’ll give you that. What did you say your name was again?”

“The great Papyrus! ‘The great’ is optional, but encouraged. Oooh! Is this my official guard helmet?” Papyrus plucked the helmet out from under Undyne’s arm before she even realized what was happening.

“Hey!” She protested, but Papyrus had already slipped the helmet over his head.

“Kind of heavy, but that’s how you can tell it’s quality!” He said in a muffled voice. He turned towards Sans “How do I look?”

"Lookin' good, Bro!" Sans gave Papyrus a thumbs up.

“Papyrus, if you don’t give that back to me right now, I’m taking it back along with everything that’s in it!” Undyne growled. Papyrus sheepishly pulled the helmet back off and held it out to Undyne, who yanked it out of his hands.

“It’s probably for the best.” Papyrus said. “That one smells like sushi and lavender.”

“I don't...how do you...You’re a skeleton!” Undyne said, frustrated. “You don’t even have a nose! How do you smell?!”

“Terrible.” Sans grinned. Undyne sighed and her shoulders sagged, but she didn’t say anything. She practically set that one up for him.

“I do not! I took a shower yesterday!” Papyrus yelled.

“Aw, come on bro. I’m just...ribbing you.” Sans winked. “You have to be a little more...humerus you know? Don't let it get under your skin.”

“Cut that out!” Papyus stomped his foot. Undyne pinched the bridge of her nose. She couldn’t deal with this now.

“Okay, okay, both of you shut up a minute.” Undyne said. She pointed to Papyrus. “You. Papyrus. You waited out here all night for another chance to talk to me, and I admire that. Come back tonight and we’ll talk more. Maybe go through some training to see if you have what it takes.”

Papyrus gasped and grinned madly. “Really?!”

“And by ‘tonight’, I mean tonight at eight o’clock!” Undyne said sternly. “No more banging on my door at midnight, got it?”

“Yes, ma’am!” Papyrus clicked his heels together and saluted.

Undyne pointed to Sans. “You, Sans, right? You need anything?”

Sans shrugged. “Not unless you want me...patella few more skeleton jokes.”

Undyne blinked a few times, put her helmet on, and turned and walked away without a word.

“Sheesh. Tough crowd.” Sans said.

Chapter Text

Alphys was still shivering and rubbing her arms when the boat arrived at the waterfall. She was used to the toasty Hotlands climate, and Snowdin was brutally cold by comparison. The lab coat just wasn’t cutting it, but at least she got the cameras mostly set up in some good locations. Now it was just a matter of running some wires to power them, but that could wait until tomorrow. Today however, Alphys thanked the boat person, hopped to shore, and went to update Undyne.

She made it over to Undyne’s house at a quick pace, hoping to get inside and maybe beg Undyne for a hot cup of tea.

Alphys rapped on the door and waited. And she waited. Alphys rapped on the door again, a little louder this time.

Alphys thought it was odd. Undyne was usually home around this time. She walked over to one of the windows and tried to peer inside. As she was standing on her toes to get a good look, she heard voices coming from around the corner. To Alphys’ relief, she heard Undyne. And another person? They were singing? No, it was more like chanting. Undyne was saying something and whoever else was there was repeating it.

“I don’t know, but I’ve been told!”

“I don’t know, *huff* but I’ve been told!”

“Royal Guard is mighty bold!”

“Royal Guard is *puff* is mighty bold!”

“I don’t know, but it’s been said!”

“I don’t *pant* don’t know, but it’s been said.”

“Royal Guard stops humans dead!”

“Royal Guard stops…*wheeze*...stops humans dead.”

“Sound off!”

“...”

“I can’t hear you, Papyrus!”

“I thought that’s what you wanted!”

Undyne rounded the corner with Papyrus, who wearing a "Jog Boy" shirt and a sweatband on his shiny white skull, close behind her. They both stopped at Undyne’s front door, and Undyne lit up when she noticed her guest.

“Oh, hey Alphys! What’s up?”

“Uh...not...not much? Who’s…” Alphys gestured at Papyrus, who was leaning on his knees and panting.

Undyne looked behind her. “Oh, right. This is Papyrus. He’s looking to join the Royal Guard, so I thought I’d put him through the paces a bit. Right, Papyrus?”

“Ma’am, yes ma’am!” Papyrus straightened up and saluted.

“Woah, stand down, recruit.” Undyne turned back to Alphys just in time to hear a clatter behind her. “I said stand down, not fall down.” Undyne sighed without bothering to turn around. Papyrus just groaned and wondered if his legs would ever stop feeling like jelly again.

“Anyway.” Undyne looked at Alphys.

“Uh…c-can I come in for a bit? I just got back from Snowdin and I need to warm up!” Alphys hopped from foot to foot, rubbing her arms.

“Yeah, sure thing! One sec.” Undyne said and walked over to Papyrus. She gently nudged him with her foot. "Tsk, tsk. Getting winded by a little jog like that?” Undyne said.

“I...I just have a cramp!” Papyrus said desperately. “I can make it!”

“Well, alright. I have to talk to Alphys, so you get off light today. Come back tomorrow and we’ll give you a real workout”

Papyrus groaned and pulled himself to his feet. After a second he straightened his back and nodded.

“It’s not going to be easy. Think you can do it?” Undyne said

“I...I can! If that’s what it takes to join the Royal Guard, then I’ll do it!” Papyrus said firmly.

“...Good. Glad to hear it. Rest up, and I’ll see you tomorrow.” Undyne said.

As Papyrus turned and made his way, shakily, down to the boat person, Undyne unlocked her door and motioned Alphys inside. Alphys quickly trotted in, and Undyne followed. To Alphys surprise, as soon as Undyne closed the door, she leaned her back against it and slid to the floor with a groan.

“Undyne! Are...are you okay?” Alphys ran over to her.

“I’m fine. I'm fine." Undyne waved her away. "I just need a minute. I think I ran a marathon.”

“What? I thought you said it was just a little jog.” Alphys look puzzled.

“I just said that because...okay, look. I honestly didn’t think this guy, Papyrus, was cut out to be a Royal Guard. I figured I would put him through the wringer and scare him off, you know? But he kept up with me! I thought the poor guy was gonna fall to pieces, but he kept going. Somehow.” Undyne reached and pulled her hairband out, shaking her hair out and letting it fall over her face.

“We’ll see if he shows up tomorrow.” Undyne said, looking up at Alphys. Alphys saw her tired face framed with long, loose, bright red hair. Undyne looked like she just got out of bed. Alphys wanted to see that face more. A lot more.

“I’ll...I’ll...g-go make us some t-t-tea. I know...I know where you keep it.” she said, trying to turn away before her face started turning red again.

“Thanks, Alphys.” Undyne said, leaning her head back against the door.

As Alphys went to work filling the kettle and putting it on the stove, Undyne hauled herself to her feet and sat at the table, watching her work.

This is stupid. She thought to herself. She’s smart, she’s passionate, and she’s cute. You don’t have to be the tough, stoic hero all the time. You’re allowed to be a bit mushy. Just, ask her out on a date! Be honest, for once.

Alphys brought over two teacups full of steaming hot tea, and placed one in front of Undyne, who mumbled a thanks. As Alphys sat down on the other side of the table, Undyne decided to give it a shot.

“Hey, Alphys?” Undyne started.

“Hmm?” Alphys looked up.

“Uh...I…” Undyne faltered. She tried, she really did, but words seemed to cling to the inside of her chest and refused to come out.

“...uh...do you need any help setting up the cameras?” Undyne finished lamely.

Alphys looked like she had just remembered something.

“That’s...that’s why I came here in the first place! I wanted to tell you that I got the cameras set up. I just need to run the wires. I set one up right at the door to the old ruins and...here, let me show you.” Alphys reached into her lab coat and pulled out a folded piece of paper. She unfolded it on the table to show a map of Snowdin and the forest. There were X’s scattered on the map. Alphys pointed to each one, explaining her reasoning for placing a camera there. Undyne nodded along politely, but her mind was elsewhere.

“...so I figured we could run the wires to a control box here in Snowdin, and we could hook that up to the internet to send...Undyne, are you alright?” Alphys looked at her with concern.

“Uh...yeah. Yeah! Of course I am!” Undyne said.

“Oh, sorry. I didn’t mean to...you just looked...kinda sad?” Alphys said carefully.

“I’m just kind of worn out from before. Honest.” Undyne said. She didn’t even like to admit something like that, but it was better than admitting she was lovesick.  

Alphys looked sympathetic. “Well, we can go over this later. Why don't you go get some rest?

“You don’t have to go now. I mean...yeah, okay, maybe you're right. Just...call me when you're going to run those wires, okay?” Undyne said.

Alphys smiled and nodded.

***

Later that night, Undyne was soaking in a hot bath, trying to loosen up her muscles a bit. She had her feet crossed and leaning on the end of the tub, and the rest of her was laying on the bottom, staring up at the ceiling through the wobbling water.

Why was this so hard? Was she afraid of rejection? Was she afraid of losing a friend? No, it wasn’t that. Whenever she wanted to talk about her feelings she just felt so...off. Maybe it was just hard for her to expose herself like that. Something in Undyne just would not let her do that. She felt like she needed to be on guard all the time.

So what if she didn’t expose her emotions to a monster who was right in front of her? What if she exposed them on a piece of paper, and she didn’t have to be there when Alphys read it? She felt like a bit of a coward, but she figured it would be the easiest way to do it.

Undyne sat up out of the water. She took a big gulp of air, clamped her mouth shut, pinched her nose, and pushed the water out of her gills to get her lungs working again.

That was it, then. She would write a...well, let’s be honest here, a love letter. She had to do this one way or another, after all.

With that out of the way, she got in her pajamas, fell into bed, and slept like three out of four rocks.

***

It was the next day, and Undyne was sitting at her table, leaning her chin on her hands and staring a piece of paper in front of her. There were at least a dozen crumpled up balls of paper scattered across the house.

“Why did I think this was the easy way out?” she grumbled to herself. She put pen to paper and tried again. She kept on talking out loud as she wrote.

“Let’s see. Smart...funny...passionate...cute...enjoy spending time with you...like to go on a date...” She dropped the pen and read it over. Well, it was a good start. She could at least keep this around when she wrote her next try.

Undyne jumped when she heard a knock at the door. She threw her herself over the paper to cover it.

“Who...who is it?” She called out in a strained voice.

“It is I, the great Papyrus!” came a voice from the other side of the door. “And I have returned for training!”

Huh, he came back after all. Undyne was impressed. She got up, straightened her shirt out, and walked to the door. Undyne stepped outside and closed the door behind her, giving Papyrus an appraising look.

“Wasn’t sure you would be back.” Undyne said.

“What?! Why wouldn’t I be? I said I would do whatever it takes to be a Royal Guard!” Papyrus put his hands on his hipbone and stood up straight.

“That you did.” Undyne couldn’t help but smile. “Alright, smiley, what’s your weapon of choice?”

“Er...weapon?” He looked unsure.

“Uh, yes? Weapon.” Undyne said. “I need to see how well you can handle a human.”

“Nyeh heh heh! The great Papyrus needs no weapons to handle a human!” Papyrus said, confidence returning.

Undyne arched an eyebrow and then shrugged. “Your funeral.”

They both walked a short distance from her house. Undyne pointed to a spot for Papyrus to stand, and she stood about ten paces away. She held out her hand and summoned a blue energy spear. This one was mainly a light show, and the worst it would do is knock Papyrus over. She didn’t tell him that, though.

“Alrighty, Papyrus. Pretend I’m a human. I’m underground and I have a weapon. What do you do?”

“Oh! Oh!” Papyrus took a very Official Stance(c) and held out his hand, palm facing Undyne. “Halt, human! Surrender now or face the wrath of the great - yikes!” Papyrus ducked, dodging Undyne’s thrown spear by a fraction of an inch. “What are you doing?!” Papyrus flailed his hands.

“Not surrendering.” Undyne said sternly. She summoned another spear and ran towards Papyrus as fast as she could. Undyne figured this would be over quickly, and then she could send Papyrus packing. However, Papyrus regained his composure and waved his hand. There was a blue flash, and Undyne fell flat on her face.

“Nyeh heh heh!” Papyrus laughed. “You are defeated, human! Now surrender at let yourself be captured!”

Undyne tried to figure out what just happened. She felt heavy and sluggish, like her bones were made of lead. The shift in weight caught her off guard, but she was one of the strongest monsters under the mountain. She could manage this. Undyne pulled herself to her feet.

“Neat trick, but you’re going to have to do better than that. Come on, you haven’t even tried to hit me once!” Undyne said. She lifted her spear and started towards Papyrus again.

“Eep!” Papyrus waved both of his hands this time. Large bones, taller than Undyne, sprouted from the earth flew towards her. Undyne smiled. Finally, he was fighting back, and with some really interesting magic. Maybe he would work out after all.

Undyne deftly sidestepped the first wave of bones that Papyrus threw at her. Papyrus waved his hands again, sprouting another row of bones between the two of them and forcing Undyne to skid to a stop.

“Once again, the great Papyrus has captured you, human!” Papyrus grinned.

“What are you talking...about?” Undyne looked around her. She was completely boxed in by bones. The first wave he summoned had wrapped around behind her, forming a little jail cell of overgrown femurs. She turned back towards Papyrus and scowled. Why did he keep on trying to capture her? Why wasn’t he fighting? Didn’t he know how dangerous humans were?

“Nyeh heh heh! See? I have outwitted you! Now do you su-”

Papyrus was cut off with a loud crack as Undyne punched the bone in front of her.

“Wait, what are you doing?” Papyrus asked in a panicked tone.

Undyne grunted and punched again. The bone started to splinter.

“But...I...just...be captured!” Papyrus yelled.

Undyne grabbed a makeshift bar in each hand. She leaned back, and smashed her forehead into the weakened bone. It shattered, and Undyne stepped through the gap. She opened her mouth to start scolding Papyrus for not fighting back, but she was interrupted.

“Jeeze, Undyne. Didn’t know you were such a...bonehead.” said a third voice.

The both turned to see Sans standing there with a lazy grin and his hands in his pockets.

“Sans!” Papyrus stamped his feet. “You’re late! I had to start without you.”

Sans shrugged. “Sorry, bro. I couldn’t find my other sock.” He scratched his chin. “Well, uh, since you already started, I don’t want to interrupt your training, so I’ll just…”

“You promised, Sans.” Papyrus looked at Sans pleadingly. Sans just sighed and nodded.

“Promised what? What’s going on?” Undyne said in an irritated tone. It bothered her that she never noticed Sans approaching. He must have been really quiet.

“Uh, hey, Undyne, can we chat for a minute?” Sans asked, rubbing the back of his neck.

Undyne’s gaze shifted between Sans and Papyrus.

“I...uh...actually I’m really thirsty. Can I go inside and get a glass of water?” Papyrus asked nervously.

“But you’re a...you don’t have...how can...Ug. Fine. Go ahead. I’ll meet you inside. Glasses are in the cupboard.” Undyne said, defeated. Papyrus cackled and ran inside at top speed, and Undyne turned back to Sans.

“So, what did you want to talk about?” Undyne crossed her arms in front of her.

“Do, uh, do you have any more of those sentry positions open?” Sans asked, smiling weakly.

“Sure, a few. Why?”

“I promised my brother I would get out of the house more. Stop being so lazy, you know?” Sans shrugged.

“Lazy? You’re not exactly selling yourself here, Sans.” Undyne said.

“Eh, I’m not really as lazy as Papyrus thinks I am, but he’s always pushing me to be better than I am. It's something I appreciate, you know?”

“Really? Because sometimes it sounds like he’s just being nasty to you.”

Sans shook his head sternly. “No. Papyrus is never nasty. He doesn’t...heh...doesn’t have a mean bone in his body. He’s the coolest guy I know and I really don’t want to let him down again.”

Undyne carefully looked Sans over. He looked like a lazy slob at first glance, but the more she looked, the more she saw a kind of weariness and sadness.

“Again?” Undyne asked quietly.

“I...uh...gave up on something, a long time ago. Something important that turned out to be kind of pointless.” Sans went on.

“I don’t understand.” Undyne said, shrugging.

Sans shook his head. “I don’t really want to go into it. It’s ancient history anyway. Uh...I think? Technically not, probably. It’s complicated.” Sans shrugged. “So, uh...what do you say? I know I don’t sound like much, but I’m real good at sitting still and watching stuff.”

Undyne sighed. Keeping the underground safe was her responsibility now, and this wasn’t a charity. Then again, it was a tough job to screw up, and she wasn’t going to stop a monster from trying to better themselves.

“I'm gonna regret this, but, fine. I'll give you a chance.”

***

Few minutes later Undyne had settled the terms of Sans’ employment and sent him on his way. With that out of the way, she only had one other skeleton to deal with. She walked back to her house, took a deep breath, and opened the door.

“Captian! I had no idea!” Papyrus standing in her living room, grinning like a maniac.

“What are you talking about?” Undyne asked with her brow furrowed. Then she realized he was holding a white sheet of paper. Oh no, she left the love letter on the table, didn’t she?

“I wasn’t sure who it was for!” Papyrus said joyously. “But when I read that it was for someone smart and funny and passionate and cute, who else could it be but me?!”

“You?! Wait a second!” Undyne protested, but Papyrus was on a roll.

“It was pretty smart of you to leave it on your table where I could just...happen to find it. You don’t have to be intimidated by me, you know!”

“Papyrus, I am not in-”

“And I’m sure you’re really, really...uh...nice...ish, Undnye, but I think we might be better off as just friends. I mean, I wouldn’t be right for the Captain to be dating a-”

“That’s for Alphys, you idiot!” Undyne finally yelled at the top of her voice.

There was a long silence, and panic slowly wormed its way onto Undyne’s face as she realized what she had just said. Papyrus was the one that spoke first.

“That scientist lady who was at your house yesterday, right? You’re in love with her?” He asked.

“Well, I don’t...I mean...ah-ha-ha…’in love’ is kind of a strong way of…putting it. Not that there’s anything wrong with her and...that...I mean…” Undyne slumped. What was she even saying? “Yes. Yes I am! What of it?” She finally said, folding her arms in front of her and scowling.

“That’s great!” Papyrus was smiling just as wide as before. “I mean, I only just met her, but she seems like a nice lady. You looked really happy to see her yesterday.”

Undyne looked confused at let her arms drop to her sides. She didn’t even know what she was expecting. For him to make fun of her? Blackmail? The more she thought about it, the more ridiculous it sounded. She walked over to the table and sat down. Well, there was nothing stopping her now.

“I’ve been trying to figure out how to tell her.” Undyne said.

“Oh, that’s easy!” Papyrus said. “You just go up to her and say, ‘Alphys, want to go on a date with me’. This letter is a good start but it’s kind of wordy.”

Undyne frowned at Papyrus. “It’s not that easy.”

“Sure it is! Here, where’s a pencil? Or a crayon. I’ll help you-”

“It’s not that easy for me!” Undyne snapped.

Papyrus went quiet. He looked at the letter, and looked at Undyne. Undyne couldn’t even look at Papyrus. She suddenly seemed very interested in the piano across the room. Papyrus quietly folded the letter in half and walked over to Undyne. He placed the letter on the table in front of her.

“I guess there are things that are harder for some monsters than others.” Papyrus said, a bit more reserved. “For some monsters it’s love letters, for some monsters it’s the crossword, for some it’s the junior jumble!”

“...what?”

“But if anyone can do something that’s hard, it’s you, Undyne! You’re the strongest, toughest monster I’ve ever met! You went right through my blue attack and my super cool magic bone trap.”

“You think so?" Undyne asked.

"Yep! And if you ever need any help, you can just asked me. If anyone knows how to woo the ladies, it's Papyrus"

"Heh, thanks Papyrus." Undyne said, despite not really wanting to know what Papyrus considered wooing the ladies.

“Sure thing! That’s what friends are for, right?” Papyrus headed towards the door. “Well, I’ll see you later for more training. I won’t hold back next time, Nyeh heh heh!”

"Yeah, yeah." Undyne watched Papyrus leave, walking straight and proud like he always did. She thought about how nice he was, and how much he seemed to care for someone he just met. She thought about how good it felt to have someone believe in her without reservation.

And then she thought about the fact that, because of that, and despite how powerful and tough Undyne was finding out he was, there was no way she could let him actually join the Royal Guard.

Chapter Text

The sudden shift in climate from the dry, cold Snowdin to the damp air of the Waterfall caused a thick, icy mist to frequently gather at the outskirts of the town. It was very difficult to see where you were going, and it was sometimes dangerous.

It was here that Undyne carefully stalked her prey. A lone humanoid figure was walking through the mist, and Undyne was doing her best to keep tabs on where it was going. She crouched low and moved as silently as possible, using her ears more than her eyes to track the figure. They weren’t being careful, and Undyne was able to follow the crunching of the frosted over snow. At one point she got careless, and stepped in a snow pile with a grinding sound. It wasn’t particularly loud, but it raked across Undyne’s ears. The other set of footprints stopped. Undyne stood perfectly still and held her breath. After what seemed like an eternity, she heard the figure walking away again.

They were getting closer to town, and if she didn’t act soon, it would be too late. She crouched low again, using all her training to move quickly and quietly, until she saw a shadow of a figure in the mist. It was now or never. Undyne dug her toes into the dirt, wound up the muscles in her legs, and, like a tiger, pounced on her prey.

“Snow Wrestling!” Undyne yelled, grabbing the figure around the waist and pulling the both to the ground.

“Waaaaugh!” Papyrus yelled. Both of them went rolling in the snow, kicking up a cloud of ice crystals. When everything had settled, Papyrus was face down in the snow with Undyne sitting on his back, hold his leg under her arm.

“And, one, two, three! Ding, ding, ding! We have a winner!” Undyne hopped off of Papyrus and held her hands in the air in victory. “The Blue Barracuda has successfully defended her title as the heavyweight champion of the world! The crowd goes wild! Aaaaahhhhh, woooo!”

Papyrus pulled his head out of the snow and spat the slush out of his mouth. “Uh-Undyne! I thought we were under attack!”

“Just keeping you on your toes, Papyrus.” Undyne grabbed his hand and hauled him to his feet. “You have to be on guard at all times, if you’re going to be a Royal Guard.”

“Wow, being a Royal Guard is tough!” Papyrus said. “All this training is hard work, and tough on the lumbar.” He pushed on his lower back until there was a popping sound.

This was the part Undyne was dreading. “Yeah, well, I wanted to talk to you about that, but it’s freezing out here. Can we go to Grillby’s or something? I’ll treat you to a burger.”

“Why would I want that? I don’t have a stomach!” Papyrus said.

“Hah, yeah, I guess…” Undyne trailed off as an idea struck her. Maybe she wouldn’t have to break his little doofus heart after all. Or at least she could buy herself some time.

“So...if you don’t eat, do you know anything about cooking?”

Papyrus shook his head. “No. Should I?”

“Well, how do you expect to capture a human without bait?!” Undyne put her arm over Papyrus’ shoulder and leaned close, like she was letting him in on a secret. “Now, let me tell you something. There’s nothing a human likes better than a nice, hot, home cooked meal. You use that to lure the human in, and then strike while it’s distracted!”

“Wow! It sounds so obvious when you say it like that. But how do I learn how to cook?”

“Well, I’ll tell you what, Papyrus. I like you. You’ve got potential! So I’ll give you some super special one-on-one cooking training.”

Papyrus gasped. “You will?!”

“Yep! It’s not gonna be easy, and it might take a while. Think you’re going to be up to it?”

“You can count on me, Undyne! I’ll be the best meal maker Underground!”

“Great!” Undyne slapped Papyrus on the back hard enough to send him face down into the snow. “We’ll start your cooking training tomorrow...oh...sorry, dude.”

“S’okay” Paprus gave her a thumbs up from the snowbank.

***

“I hate puzzles!” Undyne snapped. Alphys and her were in the waterfall, trying to set up a puzzle using the unique flowers that grew there. Alphys thought it would be a good idea to have more puzzles set up, in case a human managed to make it this far. Undyne, reluctantly, went along.

Alphys stood up after planting the last bridge flower seed.

“Really? I don’t think they’re so bad.” She said, wiping her hands off on her coat.

“Yeah, well, I had to work on them constantly for like a month. Stupid community service gig.” She mumbled.

“Community service? What did you do?”

“Nothing! I was framed! They can’t prove anything! I want a lawyer! He was like that when I got there!”

“Okay, okay. Forget I asked.” Alphys winced.

“Ug. Sorry, Alphys. I didn’t mean to yell. I’m just…” Undyne waved her hand vaguely.

“Well, uh...you know what makes me feel better?” Alphys asked.

“What?” Undyne looked puzzled as Alphys got up and walked to the shore. Alphys kneeled down in the damp, sandy soil and started shaping it.

“Making something. With...uh...with my hands.” Alphys gathered more wet sand and shaped it into an impressively even cylinder, almost as tall as she was. Undyne folded her arms and watched as Alphys drew brick lines in the wet sand with her claws, and dug out a couple of narrow windows. When she was done, she brushed her hands off and turned to Undyne.

“See?” Alphys said, gesturing at the sand-castle.

“Wow, that’s pretty good!” Undyne said, genuinely impressed.

“Hehe...uh...thanks.” Alphys said bashfully. “I’ve always been...uh...good at making things.”

“You know what I’m good at?” Undyne said, grinning like a bear-trap.

“Uh...what?”

“Breaking things!” Undyne yelled and lept forward. She landed on top of the sand-castle, flat on her stomach, and smooshed it into the ground. Alphys tumbled over backwards trying to get away from the carnage.

“Hey!” She yelped. She sat up and looked at Undyne, who was laying flat in the sand. Undyne pushed herself up and looked at Alphys. Then she shifted to her side, propped one knee up, and leaned her head on her hand, striking what she thought was a cool pose.

“Sup.” Undyne said lazily, covered in grit and sand.

Alphys stared at her for a few seconds before breaking the silence. 

“...snrk...hehehe...you...you should see yourself right now. Eh-hehehe!” Alphys rolled on her back, laughing loudly.

Undyne looked down at herself and her muddy clothes. Despite herself, she started sniggering too. She rolled on her back and held her stomach and broke out into full, barking laughter. Soon, the room echoed with the pair of them laughing hysterically for a long time.

“Ahahaha! Ehehe. Ah.” Alphys, still laying on her back, wiped the tears from her eyes. “That was fun.”

“Hehe. Yeah, it was. I feel better now.” Undyne said, staring up at the ceiling. She watched the twinkling, luminescent crystals embedded in the ceiling of the cave.

“Those are really something else, huh?” Undyne asked

“Mhm.” Alphys nodded. “You know, they say that the stars you can see above ground are even prettier. There’s...millions of them. I’d...I’d like to see that, someday.”

Undyne lay there, deep in thought. Sometimes she forgot what they all wanted. To get out from the cave and breath fresh air. To feel the warm sun on their faces. All their lives were spent in the damp, dark underground, with the rest of the world just out of reach. And it was all thanks to the humans. Stupid, rotten, violent humans. Well, she would show them. She would get Asgore another soul, and then they could leave this place. Then they could watch the sunset and stand under the stars...together.

“You will, Alphys. I promise.” Undyne said quietly.

***

Undyne lost track of how long they were laying there, but they eventually decided to get up, brush themselves off, and head to the boat person. Alphys had to head to Snowdin to work on a puzzle she had built there.

When they got to the path leading to the river, Undyne heard a sound coming from the cave near the intersection. Undyne held up her hand to stop Alphys.

“Did you hear that?” Undyne asked quietly

“Er...hear what?” Alphys said. She jumped as she heard a thud coming from the cave. “That one I heard!” She said.

“Weird, I thought that cave was abandoned.” Undyne said. She slowly walked into the cave, with Alphys following nervously behind. When her eyes adjusted to the darkness, Undyne saw stacks of boxes and some empty shelves. There was a counter at the far end.

“Looks...uh... like someone is setting up shop here.” Alphys said.

“That’s cool. It’d be nice to have a shop close to home.” Undyne started poking through one of the nearby boxes to see what was going to go on sale. Alphys looked up when she heard a shuffling noise behind the counter.

“Hello?” Alphys said. “Are you okay back there?”

“Eh?” The voice behind the counter sounded very old. “We’re not open yet! You’ll have to come back tomorrow if you want to buy anything. Unless you want to stay and help me unpack! Wa ha ha!”

Undyne’s head snapped up straight. “Wait. I know that laugh anywhere. Gerson? Is that you?” She turned towards the counter.

“What? Ow!” The counter bounced gently. A couple seconds later, a very old monster that looked somewhat like a turtle stood up, rubbing his head. As soon as he saw who was in the shop, he broke into a huge grin. “Undyne? I hardly recognized you!”

Undyne practically lept over the counter and scooped up the old turtle in a massive hug, smiling and laughing the whole time.

“Ah ha ha! It is you! Gerson, you decrepit, old fart, where’ve you been?! I haven’t seen you in years!” Undyne said, spinning the turtle around

“Woah! Wa ha ha! Okay, okay, put me down, you little shin-biter.” Gerson laughed. Undyne set Gerson back down, and he brushed off his shirt.

“Shin-biter?” Alphys asked, cocking an eyebrow.

“Oh!” Undyne looked a bit embarrassed. “Gerson, this is my friend, Alphys. Alphys, Gerson. I’ve known Gerson for...gosh, as long as I can remember.”

Gerson nodded at Alphys. “I’ve known Undyne since she was a minnow.” Gerson held his hand a couple feet of the ground. “Even back then, she was a vicious little rugrat. Followed me around when I was adventuring! Tried to help a couple times too. Key word is ‘tried’. Wa ha ha!”

Undyne looked even more embarrassed. “You’re never going to let me live that down, are you?”

“Nope! The old mailman still has the scar, you know!” Gerson grinned.

“I know.” Undyne huffed.

“Wait, wait, wait.” Alphys shook her head. “Adventuring? You’re that Gerson? Gerson, the Hammer of Justice?” She said, wide eyed.

Gerson nodded. “Yup! Seems like so long ago, now.” He turned to Undyne. “And look at you. Grown into a fine, strong, young woman, you did! I heard you made Captain of the Guard! One of the youngest ever!”

Undyne blushed and laughed nervously. “Aha. Yeah, well, it wasn’t easy.”

“So I see.” Gerson pointed to Undyne’s eye-patch. “The human give you that?”

“Technically, Alphys gave me the patch.” Undyne said with a grin. She flipped the patch to show Gerson the empty eye socket. “The human was the one that gouged my eye out.”

“Oooh. That’s rough. I got my fair share of scars from humans myself, but I never lost any pieces.” Gerson said sympathetically. “Well, you seem to be managing alright, and it’s a good look on you! Wa ha ha!”

“That’s what I said!” Undyne turned to Alphys. “Hey, Alphys, you alright over there? You’ve been quiet.”

“Well...I...just...Gerson, you’re a hero! Why are you running a shop?”

Gerson waved his hand. “Eh, I’m not a hero. Never was. And I just wanted to live my last few years in peace.”

“Not a hero? But..but…” Alphys looked confused.

“Nope!” Gerson smiled. “I was never brave enough to be a hero!”

‘What are you talking about, dude?” Undyne looked at him. “You were fearless!”

“That I was!” Gerson laughed.

Undyne shook her head. “I think you’re going senile, old timer.” She smiled wearily. “Anyway, we have to get going. Alphys has to catch the boat to Snowdin.”

“Ah. Alright. It was good to see you again, Undyne. Pleasure to meet you, Alphys. Don’t be a stranger!”

“We won’t! C’mon, Alphys.” Undyne turned and walked out of the cave. Alphys turned to follow her.

“Pst! Alphys.”

Alphys turned around to see Gerson motioning her to come closer. Alphys looked out the cave to see Undyne walking down the path, then she turned and trotted over to Gerson.

“Uh...y...yes?”

“Being fearless ain’t the same thing as being brave, young lady.” Gerson said. “Being brave is when you’re afraid, but you keep going anyway! And personally, I think being brave is what it really takes to be a hero.”

“Oh...I...uh…” Alphys wasn’t sure what to say.

“That piece of advice is free. Now you better double-time if you want to catch up to that fire-cracker. She’s got longer legs than you, as I’m sure you noticed! Wa ha ha!”

***

A few minutes later, Undyne was helping Alphys into the boat person’s boat. Alphys had to head to Snowdin to work on a puzzle she had built there.

“Do...uh...you want to come with?” Alphys asked.

“Nah, not this time. I need to get cleaned up.” Undyne gestured at her dirty clothes.

“Oh...okay then! I’ll see you later.” Alphys said, and then turned to the boat person. “Snowdin, please.”

The boat person nodded and gently started to push away from the shore.

“Waaaaaait!”

Undyne turned around to see a little yellow monster in a striped shirt running down the path. She winced as he tripped and fell, but he seemed to get back up without any problems and continued running. When he finally reached the edge of the boat, he shuffled his feet uneasily. Undyne realized that he didn’t have any arms, and the edge of the boat was a bit higher than he could manage. Undyne reached down and picked him up by the back of the shirt.

“Hey!” He said indignantly. “I can do it!”

“Sure, kid. Don’t mind me.” Undyne smiled and she dropped him into the boat. The kid regained his balance and turned around to look at Undyne indignantly. The expression turned into surprise.

“Wait, I know you! You’re the new captain of the Royal Guard...uh...Un...Undies?”

“Undyne.” She said. Alphys covered her mouth and started sniggering.

“Yeah! My sister wrote a story about you for the paper! You fought a human! That’s so cool!” The kid bounced up and down excitedly. “Was it tough? Did it have a sword? Do they really eat kids that are being bad?” The boat started wobbling.

“Please be seated.” The boat person said. The kid plopped into a seat.

“Yes, no, and maybe.” Undyne said, counting on her fingers with a wicked grin.

“We’re off.” The boat person said and gently nudged the boat away from the shore. “The water is wild today. That’s bad luck.” they said softly. They had to go upstream to get to Snowdin. Luckily, they were equipped for this. They tapped the boat with the long staff they held. A face formed on the bow and the boat slowly rose out of the water a bit.

“See you soon, Undyne!” Alphys waved. Undyne waved back from the shore.

“Bye, Undyne!” The kid couldn’t wave, so he jumped up on the edge of the boat, to Alphys’ horror.

“Woah, kid.” Undyne waved her hand. “You should probably sit-”

The boat suddenly started forward. Alphys tried to tug the kid back into the boat, but it was too late. He lost his balance and tumbled into the choppy river. Alphys leapt forward, grabbing the edge of the boat and looking over the edge, but all she could see was rushing water.

“Undyne!” She yelled, turning to the only person she could think of who could help. By the time she got the word out however, Undyne was already in the water.

***

The current was vicious, but Undyne was among the best swimmers under or over the mountain. It was her element, after all. She pulled herself towards the center of the river where the current was the strongest, and began searching frantically underwater for the kid. He had no arms, so he was probably at the mercy of the river.

Follow the current. Follow the current. Where is he? Where is...There! Undyne spotted a small figure near the surface of the water. She kicked and pulled herself upwards frantically, trying to get to the helpless monster. After what seemed like far too long, she reached out and grabbed his shirt, pulling them both to the surface.

She was relieved to hear him gasping and coughing when they broke surface. At least his was still conscious. They were still in trouble though. The water was getting faster and rougher, and Undyne had no idea how long it would be before they hit the core. If that happened, it probably wouldn’t be long until they started cooking.

“Hang on!” Undyne said, and immediately she felt like an idiot. What was he going to hang on with? She pulled him against her chest with one arm, and used the other to try and get the both to shore.

It wasn’t working. Undyne was good, but with the extra weight, one arm occupied, and the rapid current, they weren’t going to make it in time.

“Hey kid!” She yelled over the choppy water. “Tuck and roll!”

“Wha-woooah!” Undyne grabbed the kid’s shirt again and physically threw him to the shore, trying to at least aim for some soft sand. The kid quickly lost track of how many times he flipped head over heels through the air. He grunted as he landed face down in the dirt. He pulled his face off the ground and started coughing and trying to catch his breath. He frantically looked around for Undyne. He didn’t see here on the shore, and didn’t see here in the water. Did she get pulled under? Were they going to fish her out of the core cooling system like a poached fish? He didn’t even want to think about it. Suddenly, the river in front of him erupted like a geyser. He watched, wide eyed and opened mouthed, as Undyne sailed through the air, flipped once, and landed deftly on her feet on the bank next to him. Undyne spat some water out of her mouth and started to wring her hair out. She looked down at the monster kid.

“Sorry about the rough landing. You okay, kid?” She said, catching her breath

The kid stared for a few more seconds before nodding gently.

“Alright.” Undyne grabbed a handful of her shirt and wrung as much water out as she could. “Let’s get you back home.”

He stared at her. Undyne wondered what was wrong with him.

“Uh...kid?”

“...that was...so cool!” He lept to his feet. “I thought I was gonna die and then you just came out of nowhere and threw me through the air and then you just shot of out the water like pshoo!” He hopped straight up. “And that flip was so awesome and I wish you were my big sister instead.”

“Heh.” Undyne grinned. She briefly wondered if this was how Gerson felt when she followed him around. “Well, next time, sit your butt down when the boat person tells you to, alright?”

“Okay.” The kid nodded.

“Good.”

“Can we do it again?”

“No!”

***

“So, who are you, anyway?” Undyne asked the kid. They were both wandering through the waterfall, trying to make their way back to the main road. Undyne wasn’t familiar with this area, but she didn’t want to admit that she was lost.

“Kid!” He said.

“Yeah, but what’s your name?” Undyne said, thinking he misunderstood.

“My name is Kid!” He said again, sounding a bit frustrated.

“Really? Jeeze, did Asgore name you?”

“It’s kind of a long story.” he said, right before running into the back of Undyne’s legs. “Sorry!” He said.

“It’s fine. Hang on a second.” Undyne said. The had come to a steep incline down to a little-used road. Undyne stepped forward and carefully slid down the pebbly slope. She almost fell forward when she hit the bottom, but she managed to keep her balance. Undyne looked around. She didn’t recognize it right away, but it was more promising looking than where they had been walking.

“Okay, Kid. Looks good!” She called back up. “I’ll come back up and give you a-”

“Woooah!” Kid bounced down the slope and landed flat on his face at the bottom. Undyne winced hard. He peeled himself off of the ground and bounced back to his feet.

“I’m fine!” he said quickly.

“Heh. You bounce like a ball, Kiddo.” Undyne said. “Okay, now where are we?”

Undyne tried to make out something familiar looking in the darkness. There was a big rock over there that kind of looked like a statue. Was that a carving of some kind in the wall there? It looked pretty familiar.

Oh no. She was pretty sure she knew where they were now.

“Oh boy. Kid, let’s get a move on. We don’t want to hang around here.” Undyne said stiffly.

“What? What’s wrong?” He asked, worried.

“Nothing! Nothing.” Undyne said in a very obvious trying-to-be-the-adult voice. “There’s...just some monsters around here we really don’t want to run into. Just...just stick close to me, alright? We’ll be fine.”

Kid nodded, worried looking, and practically attached himself to Undyne’s leg. They both started making their way down the path. Undyne maintained a quick pace, keeping her hand on Kid’s head. Kid jogged to keep up. He saw something out of the corner of his eye, off of the path.

“Who’s that?” He whispered. Undyne looked over to the side. She hissed a word that Kid didn’t recognize, but it sure sounded like a swear word to him. She actually grabbed his head and turned it so he was looking straight ahead.

“Don’t make eye contact!” She whispered. “Maybe they’ll leave us alone. C’mon, Kid. Stick close and hurry up. We’re almost-”

“Hoi!”

“Run, Kid.”

***

They were past the mushroom valley before Undyne signaled for them to stop running. They both leaned over and panted heavily, catching their breath.

“What...what was that?” Kid asked.

“A Temmie.” Undyne puffed. “Weird little monster.”

“Are they dangerous?”

Undyne shook her head. “Nah. Not really. I’m just allergic to them. They make me break out in hoi...I mean, hives.”

“Oh.”

“I mean, most monsters are allergic to Temmies. Even some of the Temmies are allergic to Temmies!”

“What? How does that even work?” Kid arched an eyebrow.

“I don’t know! Isn’t that the stupidest thing you’ve ever heard?” Undyne asked desperately.

“Captain!”

Undyne looked up to see Doggo making his way down the path towards them.

“Hey, Doggo!” Undyne waved, mainly so that Doggo could keep track of where she was. He stopped in front of the two of them.

“Alphys told us what happened.” Doggo said. “The whole canine unit has be scouring the riverbank for you. Are you two alright?”

“Yeah, we’re fine.” Undyne nodded. That was smart of Alphys. Instead of trying to look for them herself, she went and got some monsters who were much better at tracking. “Hey, Doggo, do me a solid and take this kid back to Snowdin, would you?” She nudged Kid forward.

“Aw, you’re not coming?” Kid looked up at Undyne sadly.

“Nah, I got stuff to do, Kiddo.” Undyne said. Like sleep for twelve hours. She added to herself.

“Okay.” Kid said morosly. “You’ll be in Snowdin again soon though, right?”

“Sure thing.” Undyne grinned.

“C’mon, Kid.” Doggo put his hand on Kid’s head and they started to make their way back to Snowdin.

As soon as they both turned the corner, Undyne made her way back home.

As soon as she got inside, she changed into some warm pajamas and made her way to bed. She stopped when she saw the light on her phone blinking. There were a lot of messages, all from Alphys. Undyne couldn’t help but grin as she dialed her number. Alphys picked up almost before the first ring was finished.

“H-hello!?” Alphys voice cracked on the other side of the line.

“Hey, Alphys!”

“Undyne! Are you okay? What happened? I was so worried that-”

“Shhh. Relax, Alphys, I’m fine. It’s kind of a long story…”

***

A few days passed, and Undyne was making her way through Snowdin forest while dressed in her armor. She was checking up on the guard stations and making sure the cameras were all still hidden. The canine unit knew well enough that when Undyne was wearing her armor, she was on duty and it was all business. They saluted her and gave their usual reports, that all was quiet. She saluted them back and told them to keep up the good work. When she got to San’s station, she sighed. It was empty.

“Where is that lazy sack of bones?” She grumbled, looking around. She made her way further down the path, and eventually spotted him standing next to the door leading to the old ruins. Well, at least he could still keep an eye on the path there.

“Hey, Sans!” She called out. Sans jumped, startled. He whipped around and looked at Undyne. Undyne was sure she was imagining things, but she was sure she saw a blue flash when he looked at her. It was gone as soon as it came, though.

“Oh, it’s you, Undyne. What’s shakin’?” Sans said.

“Sans, when I’m in uniform…”

“Right, sorry, Captain.” Sans nodded.

“It’s fine. What are you doing over here?”

“Oh...uh…” Sans looked at the door. “Just practicing knock knock jokes. Figured a door would be a great place for it, you know?”

“Well, can you practice some different jokes back at your station?”

“Sure thing.”

They both started back down the path towards the first guard station. Undyne noticed that Sans was quietly looking at the ground as they walked. It concerned her a bit.

“Hey, Sans.”

“Hm?” Sans looked up.

“Tell me a joke.” Undyne grinned.

“Okay. Uh...what instrument does a skeleton play?”

“Dunno. What instrument does a skeleton play?”

“A trombone.” Sans smiled.

“Hah!” Undyne laughed. “I can’t play a trombone, but I can tuna piano.”

“...”

“Tuna? Get it? Oh come on, that was funny!”

“Heh. Sorry about that, Captain.” Sans smiled weakly.

“What’s eating you, Sans?” Undyne stopped and turned around, looking at Sans with concern. Sans looked back at the door and looked at Undyne.

“Hey...uh...have you ever made a promise to someone? Even though you weren’t sure if you can keep it?”

Undyne thought back to her conversation with Alphys after playing in the sand. You will Alphys, I promise. “Yeah, I have.”

“So...what are you going to do?”

“I’m going to keep it.” Undyne shrugged.

“But if you’re not sure if you can…”

“No. You can’t think that you might not be able to keep it. That’s just giving yourself an excuse. You made a promise, so keep it. Especially...especially if it’s someone important to you.”

Sans stood quietly for a short time, and then nodded. “Yeah, you’re right.”

“Good. So, anything to report, Sentry?”

“All quiet, Captain.” Sans grinned, back to is old self.

“Good. Now I need to check up on your brother. Know where he is?”

“I think he went to go buy more spaghetti.”

“Oh God.” Undyne rubbed her eyes. What did she get herself into?

Chapter Text

Soon after Undyne got back home, there was a heavy thudding at the door.

“Be there in a second, Papyrus!” Undyne called back, finishing putting her armor back on the stand in her room. In the kitchen, she grabbed a new pot out of the cupboard and put it on the stove. Then she went to answer the door.

“Hey Pap…” She swung the door open and trailed off when she was faced with a massive stack of spaghetti boxes. She leaned to the side and saw Papyrus standing on the other side, holding the pile.

“Hi! I hope this is enough.” Papyrus smiled. “The turtle at the shop said that this was all he had.”

“Enough? Yeah, enough for a year, probably!” Undyne exclaimed. “Papyrus, one box is plenty to feed two people.”

“Oh. Well, can I come in? These are getting kind of heavy.” he grinned sheepishly.

“Yeah, sure.” Undyne stepped aside. Papyrus stumbled in and dropped the stack of boxes over to the side. “How did you pay for all of this?” she asked

“Oh! When I told the shop owner what it was for, he said he knew who you were and would put it on your tab.” Papyrus said.

“Gerson…” Undyne sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. “I’m going to kill that man.” She muttered under her breath.

“Er...come again?”

“I said ‘go fill the pan’. Here.” Undyne picked a box of the stack and handed it to Papyrus.

“Mission accepted!” Papyrus snached the box out of her hands. While Papyrus was trying to fiddle with the box to get it open, Undyne was rummaging through her cupboard to find vegetables for the sauce.

“Tomatoes...onions...a pepper for some kick…” She talked as she was stacking veggies in her arm.

“Spaghetti is ready, Undyne!” She heard Papyrus say.

“Great, turn the heat on high and come over here.” Undyne replied, setting the vegetables on the counter. After a couple of tries to find the right knob, Papyrus set the burner as high as he could before going over and standing next to Undyne.

“Okay.” Undyne said. “Now, spagetti is nothing without a good sauce. We're going to pretend these vegetables are the enemy. Let’s say they’re dangerous humans and they’re attacking monsters. Let ‘em have it!” Undyne stepped to the side.

“My time to shine!” Papyrus took Undyne’s place. He stood with his feet apart, put one hand on his hip and held the other one out. “Halt, humans! Cease this senseless violence! What would your poor tomato...I mean, human mothers say if they saw you acting like this?”

Undyne rolled her eye. “Papyrus, what are you doing? Are you seriously going to just try and ask a human to stop being violent?”

“Well, what else would I do?” Papyrus shrugged.

“You fight! Humans are powerful and dangerous!”

“But they might not be!” Papyrus replied. “You have to give them a chance, first.”

“Yeah, well, excuse me if I’m not willing to take another risk with a human. I only have one more eye.” Undyne pointed to her eye-patch.

Papyrus looked crestfallen. “Did...did a human really do that to you?”

“Yeah.” Undyne said. She felt bad putting a hole in his innocent worldview, but it was better that he learn now. “And it hurt, a lot. It put me in the hospital.”

“But...but why would they do that?”

“Why do you think? Because…” Undyne stopped as she remembered the battle. Because it was in pain. Because it was dying. Because you put a spear through its chest.

“...because I was defending myself and my friends!” Undyne said firmly.

“Oh! So...so it attacked you?” Papyrus asked carefully.

Undyne faltered again. She remembered her spears bouncing off of the pan it was holding. She tried to remember when it when it actually attacked her, but all she could remember was its thumb in her eye, and the pained expression, and the gray dust on its clothes.

“It attacked the previous captain of the guard.” Undyne said quietly.

“Wow...I wonder what made it do that?” Papyrus rubbed the back of his head.

Because the captain was trying to capture it.

“It attacked monsters at the waterfall!” Undyne said, more to herself than Papyrus.

They were probably trying to capture it too. It got through all of Snowdin without laying a finger on other monsters. Why would it leave them alone?

“We need their souls to free all the monsters underground. So many monsters have been trapped here for so long...” Undyne said, although she wasn’t sure who she was trying to convince anymore. “...and there’s no telling what could have happened if it got to the core, or to Asgore. Some humans that came through here before were nasty! They hurt a lot of monsters.”

“Wow, they sound kind of scary.” Papyrus said.

“Yeah, that’s why only the best get in the Royal Guard. I need to make sure you can ki...I mean, capture a human.” Undyne said. She winced a little. Her throat was starting to get itchy and there was a harsh smell in the room.

“So if I prove I can capture a human, you’ll let me into the Royal Guard?” Papyrus asked eagerly.

“I mean, I guess I c-” Undyne started coughing violently. She leaned over and looked behind Papyrus. Flames were jumping out of the pot on the stove.

“Papyrus!” Undyne yelled. “The spaghetti!”

“What? Aaaah! But, but, I did what you said! I put it in the pot!”

“You were supposed to put water in the pot first!”

“You didn’t say that!”

“Get it out of here!”

Papyrus grabbed the handles of the pot and held it at arm’s length and raced to the door. Unfortunately, the door was closed and he had his hands full. He looked around in a panic and finally, he ran to the window and jumped right through the glass. Undyne carefully leaned out the shattered window and watched Papyrus make his way, screaming, down the path. Undyne was impressed. He hit the ground running and didn’t even slow down. It was a perfect landing. Her good mood vanished when she realized that she needed to find something to tape over the window

***

“That’s more or less what happened.” Undyne said, putting her tea on the table. Asgore, sitting on the other side of the table, nodded politely.

It was the next day when Asgore came to visit Undyne’s house at the waterfall. It was more a social call than anything else. Asgore still thought of himself as somewhat of a father figure to Undyne, and wanted to check up on her outside of work. Undyne made some tea, and related the whole tale of Papyrus’ special training.

“Well, that explains why your window is taped over, and why it smells a bit smokey in here. What did you do with the rest of the noodles?” Asgore asked. Undyne walked over to a cupboard and opened it. It was packed tight with boxes of spaghetti. Asgore wasn’t sure how the door stayed shut.

“I see.” Asgore nodded. “I will settle the bill with Gerson. I think we can technically expense them as training materials.

“Thanks, Asgore.” Undyne closed the cupboard door and sat back down. She noisily sipped her tea. There was an uneasy silence between the two for a short while.

“Was he right?” Undyne finally asked.

“Right about what?” Asgore looked up.

“About...not knowing if the humans that come down here are actually bad.”

Asgore sighed. He was afraid of this happening. He put his tea down. “Undyne, humans have very powerful souls. They are capable of unimaginable kindness or indescribable cruelty. Time and time again, I see the latter. Even before the war, they would kill each other, rob each other, and cause pain and grief. Do you know how they created the barrier that sealed us underground?” Asgore asked. Undyne shook her head.

“Humans can not perform magic, so they slew seven of their own and trapped their souls. They captured, killed, and bound their own people to trap us here. The ones that have fallen down here...they fear us, they hurt us, and they kill us. The very human that took your eye was the kindest human that had fallen down here. It had only killed a few monsters before you stopped it. However, even one is too many. They have taken so much from us. From me.”

Asgore slowly got up and turned. He folded his hands behind his back, and looked out the window. Undyne got up and stood behind him.

“Six. We have six human souls. We need seven. We only need one more to be free and take back our place on the surface. Do you wish to see the surface, Undyne?”

“Well, yeah. Of course.” Undyne shrugged.

“Of course.” Asgore nodded. “That is what all the monsters want, I know. I feel all of their hearts beating with that same desire. The desire to live our lives peacefully on the surface, under the stars and sun and moon. We can not hesitate now, not when we are so close. We can’t afford to let any chances slip by, since we do not know how long it will be before we get another.”

Asgore sighed heavily.

“I need your help, Undyne. I need your help to see that we can secure the last soul we need without innocent monsters being harmed in the process. Violence and killing are the easy way out for a human. They will always choose it sooner or later. We can’t give them that chance.”

He turned and put his hands on Undyne’s shoulder.

“I know I am asking you to do something very difficult, and I would not think any less of you for not being willing to take on such a burden. However, you are strong, and you are brave, and you are determined to do the right thing. I would not ask this of you if I did not think you could do it. Will you help me?”

Undyne thought back to her fight with Asgore. How even though she was violently attacking him, he didn’t lift a finger to harm her since he didn’t feel that he needed to. She thought of how he trained her every day until no other monster underground could match her. He thought of how he guided her through her troubles.

She remembered how she felt when she saw the look of pride on his face.

Undyne gave a short laugh. “What a stupid question. Of course I’ll help you, you old goat.” Undyne leaned forward and wrapped her arms around her mentor. Asgore smiled and embraced her in return.

“Thank you.” He said quietly, before pulling away. “And now, I must head back to New Home. I have many things that I need to take care of.”

“Sure. I’ll walk with you a bit.” Undyne said. Maybe she could drop in and see Alphys.

As they walked down the path, Asgore made sure to stay a few steps ahead so that Undyne did not see the crushing guilt and sadness on his face.

***

It turned out Alphys wasn’t home, although Undyne was puzzled when she noticed the water cooler set up halfway between the border of to the Waterfall and Alphys’ lab. She pulled a sticky note off of the tank and red it.

Undyne,

I know the heat bothers you, so I put this here for you. I hope it lets you visit more often.

-Alphys

Undyne smiled, grabbed a paper cup out of the dispenser, and took a drink. It was nice and cold. Undyne would have to remember to thank Alphys next time she saw her. She decided to take the long way back to her home at the waterfall. Undyne thought best when she was walking, and she had a lot to think about.

For instance, she felt better about her job after her talk with Asgore. It seems that all the humans that have fallen down here caused some amount of trouble or another. Even the kindest one had killed a few monsters before it gouged her eye out. That was...very unpleasant. It didn’t attack her first, but it had killed other monsters. She couldn’t be sure what the situation was, could she? She had to do the right thing, right? She had to play it safe. It was her job to protect the other monsters underground.

“It was going to attack defenseless monsters!” She said out loud, as if hearing it made it more true

“It was going to attack it was going defenseless monsters it was it attack…” Undyne winced. Echo flowers. They creeped her out, and having a bunch together made them even worse. They babbled on, bouncing her exclamation back and forth between them.

“...attack was monsters defenseless monsters attack it was it was monsters attack it was defenseless...”

Undyne held her head in her hands. “It didn’t act defenseless! It was blocking my spears with that frying pan!”

“It didn’t act defenseless It was didn’t blocking my spears it defenseless frying pan it was attack defenceless going monsters spears it was blocking frying pan it didn’t attack it was blocking...”

“That isn't fair!” She screamed into the darkness.

“That isn’t fair monsters spears attack defenseless was didn't act defenseless frying pan blocking attack spears isn't fair...”

Undyne growled and clenched her fists until her knuckles turned white. She took some deep breaths. This was crazy. She was arguing with echos. It was just babble. It didn’t mean anything.

It was just her own stupid words reflected back at her.

She walked the rest of the way to her home in frustrated silence, though she couldn’t get words out of her head.

Fine, next time, I’ll make it fair.

***

Later that day, Undyne was making her rounds in Snowdin in her guard armor. It turned out that’s where Alphys was. She couldn’t help but notice how cute Alphys looked with a scarf and earmuffs. She had mittens too, but those were currently stuffed in her pocket to keep her hands free. Alphys had her head inside the control computer and was putting the finishing touches on the Snowdin puzzle she had designed, while Papyrus and Undyne stood around and eagerly awaited the results of all of her hard work. Undyne noted that the computer looked a lot like Mettaton’s boxy body. She must have had gotten those cases on sale, or something.

“There!” Alphys popped the panel back into place and quickly put her mittens back on. “Okay, the moment of truth.” She reached out and smacked a button on the front panel. The squares on the grid next to the machine started to light up. They blinked, flashing in different colors. Undyne watched, hypnotized as they flashed faster and faster, like some kind of disco light show. Finally, they stopped in a scrambled pattern of different colors. Alphy walked over to the panel and looked at it carefully.

“So...what did it do?” Undyne asked.

“Each one of these squares does a different thing, depending on the color.” Alphys said. “The, uh...red ones can’t be moved through. See?” She gently kicked at a red square with her booted foot. Even though the square was flat, there as a thunk and Alphys’ foot stopped as if she had kicked something solid.

“The green ones make a sound that alert nearby monsters.” She stepped on a green square. There was a loud honking sound.

“Nifty!” Papyrus said. “You must be really smart! What does this one do?” Papyrus’ hand hovered over a yellow square.

“Oh! Be carefull that one is…”

“Nyagagag-g-g-g-g!” Papyrus vibrated violently and then fell back into the snow. A faint wisp of steam wafted up from the snow.

“...electrified.” Alphys finished meekly. Undyne leaned over to check on Papyrus, but he hopped back to his feet.

“I’m okay!” He said brightly. “I was just startled! Shocked, you might say.”

“You sound like your brother.” Undyne groaned. Alphys just sniggered and started gathering up her tools.

“Base slander!” Papyrus yelled, outraged.

Undyne sighed and jammed her helmet back on her head. “I should get back to work. I need to clear out some of the tall grass on the path in Waterfall.

“Oh!” Alphys looked up from her toolbox. “Actually...uh...can...can you leave that grass alone? Please?”

“What? Why?” Undyne’s asked, voice muffled by her helmet.

“It’s...uh...it-it’s important to some...experiments...I’m doing.” Alphys said, looking at her boots.

“Well, alright. If you say so.” Undyne said after a pause. Alphys breathed a sigh of relief. “Still, I should get back to my rounds. C’mon Alphys, I’ll walk you to the boat person.”

“O-okay!” Alphys said brightly. She picked up her toolbox and waded through the snow over to Undyne.

“Papyrus. Do me a favor and check the puzzles around here, would you? Just make sure everything is working alright. A human could come through here at any time.”

“Yes ma’am!” Papyrus saluted.

***

The days came and went. The Snowdin canine squad, along with Sans and Papyrus, kept an eye out for humans. Undyne kept the order underground, and “trained” Papyrus in her spare time. Alphys spent a lot of her free time either watching Anime or working on puzzles. Sans slept a lot and told bad jokes.

Today, Sans walked down the path with his hands in his pockets. The air was still here, and it was cold and quiet. It was starting to get to him, so he decided to walk over to the door and practice his knock knock jokes again. He was close enough to his station, right? And it’s not like a human could walk past his station without walking through the door first, right? He...really felt like he could use someone to talk to right now. Maybe the lady on the other side of the door would be there.

He stopped and stood in front of the old, stone door. He took a deep breath, tried to recall his best joke. He reached up, balled up his fist and...stopped. The door clicked and the knob began to turn. Sans jumped away from the door and into the trees. He stood silently and watched.

The door slowly swung open, and a small human stepped out into the snow.

Chapter Text

It had been a tiring day. A human did come underground and set them free, but not in the way Undyne was expecting. They were just a child named Frisk, although Undyne didn’t know where she heard the name, but they changed everything. They changed how Undyne and the whole underground viewed humans. They changed the long routine of many monsters that lived underground. They changed the relationship between Undyne and Alphys.

It was the first time Undyne had seen a sunset. The moment was tainted a bit by having to drag Papyrus back to the group before he went off and introduced himself to the nearest human. They elected to let Frisk and Asgore go first, but in the morning. They needed to rest. The group of them build a warm fire, set up camp, and spent their first night on the surface.  

Late in the night, someone gently shook her shoulder.

“Undyne…”

“Mmmph.” Undyne tried to ball herself up and go back to sleep, but she was gently shaken awake again. She turned her head and saw Alphy’s face in the dying firelight.

“Mmm?” Undyne intoned.

“S-sorry.” Alphys whispered. “But I wanted to show you something.”

“What?”

“It’s...uh...it’s a surprise. I think you’ll like it.”

Undyne shrugged and slowly got to her feet. Alphys took Undyne’s hand, making her smile a bit.

“Alright, close your eyes and...uh...follow me.”

“Uh...okay?” Undyne closed her eyes and let Alphys gently lead her by the hand. Alphys carefully lead her through the woods, making sure to mention roots or rocks that might trip Undyne up.

“Where are we going?” Undyne asked, after a few minutes.

“Uh...away from the fire. Where it’s dark.”

“Oooh, dark and private, huh?” Undyne grinned mischievously.

“W-what? N-n-no! Not that! Not that...uh...I wouldn’t like to...um...it’s...just trust me, okay?”

“If you say so.” Undyne said, still grinning. Alphys grumbled. Undyne figured that they must have been wandering for a while, at least ten or fifteen minutes, before Alphys finally stopped.

“Okay, open your eyes.” Alphys said. Undyne didn't bother to correct Alphys on her pluralization, but she had to blink a few times to make sure that her eye was open. It was pitch black.

“I can’t see a thing, Alphys.” Undyne said, slightly annoyed.

“Look up.” Alphys whispered. Undyne sighed and leaned her head back, looked at the sky and…she gasped.

Stars. They must have come to a clearing in the forest, because Undyne’s entire field of view was taken up by sparkling, twinkling stars. There had to be millions of them, scattered across the sky. Undyne could make out a faint, white trail cutting through the sky like an old, faded scar.

“It’s called the Milky Way.” Alphys said quietly, as if she knew what Undyne was looking at. “A cloud of a hundred billion stars that we’re sitting on the edge of.”

A hundred billion. Undyne didn’t even know how to process a number like that. It slowly dawned on her what she was staring at. Undyne had spent her whole life in a cave that you could walk across in less than a day. Even with all the crystals in the cavern ceiling she knew that the roof was never more than a mile or so away. That was all she ever knew.  And here she stood on the surface, with the ceiling ripped away and exposing her to hundreds of millions of square miles of an entirely new world and a hundred billion stars beyond it. Underground, she was one of the strongest, toughest monsters around, and now she felt so very small. Undyne's stomach lurched, and she felt like she was going to fall into the sky.

“Undyne? Are you okay?” Alphys asked.

“Wha…” Undyne couldn’t tear herself away from the view.

“You’re shaking…” She said, concerned.

“...It’s too big.” Undyne whispered. Alphys squeezed her hand and, somehow, it helped. It made her feel grounded. Undyne closed her eye and took several deep breaths, and she calmed down.

“I…uh...I’m sorry.” Alphys said, sounding embarrassed. “I didn’t mean to…”

“It’s fine, Alphys. I’m fine.” Undyne said quickly. “It’s beautiful. You don’t have to apologize.”

In truth, even though Undyne would never admit it, she was still a little scared. Undyne thought about how brave Alphys was. It took her a while, but Alphys faced her demons and accepted the consequences for what she did. She opened herself up to everyone, even though she was sure it was going to be painful.

Well, it was time for Undyne to face what scared her too. She glanced at it earlier, but now it was time to confront it head on

“I love you, Alphys.” Undyne said quietly.

“...I...I love you too, Undyne.” Alphys whispered

And just like that, Undyne didn’t know what she was so scared of this whole time. She sat on the grass, put her arm around Alphys, and they looked at the stars together. Whatever was out there, Undyne knew she wouldn’t have to face it alone.