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It’s a good life.
It’s not perfect.
But it’s good.
Alec doesn’t believe in perfection. People who do are not only unrealistic and idiotic but are maybe even intentionally setting themselves up to be disappointed.
Nothing can be perfect.
No person or thing or place.
Not even Magnus is perfect – a difficult thing for his brain to comprehend and for his heart to admit.
But he’s gotta be honest about this kind of shit.
Magnus is not perfect.
Maybe thinking that he is – or expecting him to be – might have caused some trouble in the past.
But no.
Magnus Bane is not perfect.
No one is.
No one can be.
What people can do instead though is come close.
They can come really close to being perfect.
Minerva Jude Lightwood-Bane, the apple of his eye and sunshine of his heart, is one of those people.
She really does enjoy messing up Alec’s reasonable and rational ideologies for the world and people.
He learns so much from her every single day and he never really wants to stop.
But a small part of his brain, the stupid part, is kinda waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Nothing is perfect. So, neither is she.
There has to be something wrong with her. Something that will make him want to walk out to the balcony and smoke through an entire pack of cigarettes.
She is his daughter, yes.
But she is also Max and Rafael’s sister. She can’t be that different from her brothers.
So, Alec waits.
He waits patiently – year after year – for Minerva’s fatal flaw to slap him in the face.
But nothing.
Alec waits for something to show as she grows older. People do become more hateful and annoying as they grow older.
But nothing.
“Maybe she will become a Republican,” Rafael had equipped – which Alec had not found funny.
“Maybe she will get bullied for speaking Indonesian and then will develop an internalized sense of racism and become embarrassed of her identity,” Magnus had said.
Which was like a whole other thing and Alec needs to dive deep into that later – because that seems like a Magnus problem than a Minnie problem.
“Maybe she is straight,” Max had made a face. “No offense, Rafael.”
Alec doesn’t know.
But he waits to find out. Nervously. Eagerly.
Minerva started middle school just a year ago. She is 11 now.
Kids always turn into little cunts during middle school – as if they are preparing for puberty and the inevitable traumas that await them in high school.
Maybe he is close to discovering her flaw.
So. When Magnus walks into their bedroom in the Brooklyn apartment with that face, Alec’s worst fears come true.
Alec knows Magnus’ face better than he knows the state map of New York.
He knows all the ridges and planes and smooth lines and the nonexistent wrinkles.
He knows this face too.
This is the “I have some difficult news to share with you about one of the heathens we unleashed into the world” face.
But this face is usually followed by something about Max or Rafael – and very rarely, both.
This is the same face Magnus had on when he informed Alec that Rafael wanted to contest Valentine’s problematic abortion bill. He wanted to contest Valentine out of all people. Stupid boy.
This is the same face Magnus had on when he told Alec that Max got secretly married and told no one. This fucking kid.
Alec honestly doesn’t know how he is alive after all of this.
And yet.
“We need to talk about Minerva,” Magnus tells him, and Alec’s heart almost stops.
Oh god. It’s happening. It’s happening.
“What’s wrong?” Alec asks as he pushes his iPad from his lap, where an email from the current governor waits for his advice on a healthcare bill.
Something has happened for sure.
Maybe she is doing drugs.
Wait. No. That’s not a flaw.
Maybe she is selling drugs.
How an 11 year is selling drugs in middle school is not something he will understand. But he wouldn’t put it past a Lightwood-Bane.
“Okay so,” Magnus exhales. “I was doing laundry.”
“Okay.”
“And, like, there wasn’t enough items, so I went into Minerva’s room to grab some from her basket-”
“Magnus!” Alec is already annoyed. “I thought you wanted her to do her own laundry.”
“And I stand by that,” Magnus huffs. “Learning how to do laundry is a life skill, Alexander.”
A skill he never really learned if he is being completely honest with himself.
“Then why are you doing her laundry?” Alec demands.
“I can’t do a laundry cycle when it’s only half full,” Magnus protests. “What a waste of water!”
“Then wait until you have more clothes!”
“But I needed to wash that blue Hermes shirt,” Magnus pouts.
“The wash only that one. With your hands,” Alec points out.
“Hand wash a Hermes shirt?” Magnus looks scandalized. “Darling, you really do say the most ridiculous things.”
Alec doesn’t have time for this right now. “So, you went into her room and?”
“And I looked inside her laundry basket.”
Oh god.
“Did you find a thong?” Alec asks in a horrified whisper. “Is she wearing thongs?”
“She is 11!” Magnus yells.
“Baby, I don’t know what 11-year-olds are doing these days but they are definitely not having tea parties and climbing tree houses,” Alec rolls his eyes.
Minerva is growing up in an entirely different generation.
It’s not…It’s not different.
Kids who come out as transgender when they are eight and little girls who protest the patriarchy and middle schoolers leading the conversation on climate change.
It’s not different or new.
These people have always existed. These feelings have always existed.
But Minerva’s generation is louder than the ones before.
They are loud and fearless, and they have zero fucks to give.
Alec supposes growing up in a world that’s fucked up more than it has ever been before can do that to you.
“She is not wearing thongs,” Magnus rolls his eyes right back at him. “But…But this is indeed concerning, um, underwear.”
Alec blinks. “I’m not following.”
Magnus edges closer to the bed as if to whisper a secret. “There was blood on her underwear.”
“Is she hurt?” Alec sits up properly. “Oh god. Is she sick? Is she dying?”
“Alexander,” Magnus hisses. “I think she got her period.”
Oh.
Oh.
“Okay,” Alec blinks again. “Um. Okay. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Cool. Okay.”
“Can you say anything other than okay?” Magnus asks dryly.
“What the fuck do you want me to say?” Alec demands.
Magnus sits down on the edge of the bed. “This is big. She needs a talk.”
“The sex talk?” Alec gapes.
Surely not yet.
She is a baby. She is his baby.
“No, not the sex talk, although yes now that we’re here, we should do that soon too,” Magnus says practically and Alec kinda wants to throw up. “But she needs a talk about this. Periods and stuff.”
“Okay,” Alec says – because, yeah, okay, that makes sense. “When are you going to talk to her?”
“Excuse me?” Magnus looks offended. “Why am I the one who is talking to her?”
“Because!” Alec argues. “Because you like this stuff. You’re the one who is always giving them talks about stuff!”
It’s true.
Alec is oh so grateful. And fucking relieved.
He is good at yelling at the kids – both with love and in anger.
He is good at talking to them after they make a mistake to help them realize what went wrong and how to do better.
He is definitely good at giving advice when they need some.
But this? Talks?
The kind of shit he has to research about and prepare for? Yeah. Not his thing at all.
“Not about this,” Magnus grumbles.
“Why not?” Alec frowns in surprise. “Because you’re a man?”
“Of course not,” Magnus says indignantly and then mutters something under his breath, his cheeks going a little pink.
“What was that?” Alec asks, a little fond now.
Magnus looks embarrassed.
He likes it when Magnus is shy and embarrassed. It doesn’t happen very often.
“I don’t know anything about this,” Magnus exhales – embarrassed – and a little guilty too. “Sorry.”
“Baby, you don’t have to apologize for this,” Alec says immediately, taking his hand. “It’s okay not to know stuff. Especially stuff like this.”
“Because I’m a man?” Magnus smiles a little.
“Because the education system is flawed,” Alec replies and squeezes his husband’s hand. “Can you…Can’t you do some research though?”
“Of course I can! You know I love researching things I don’t know about,” Magnus pouts again. “But I need time for that, Alec. I think we need to talk to her today. What if…What if she needs something?”
“Emotional support?” Alec asks.
“Yes, but also like, other things,” Magnus replies. “Feminine hygiene products.”
“The fuck is a feminine hygiene product?” Alec makes a face. “Sounds like a scam.”
“Oh my god. How do you know less than me?” Magnus groans. “You grew up with a sister.”
“A very independent and self-sufficient sister who didn’t let us into her room,” Alec informs and then gasps suddenly. “Magnus. We should tell Izzy. She’ll talk to Minerva.”
“We can’t ask someone else to talk to her for us,” Magnus immediately shakes his head. “Then she’ll think she can’t talk to us about girl stuff.”
“Okay, you’re right,” Alec says in frustration. “Right. Um. Then what do we do?”
“We just need some guidance,” Magnus tells him. “We need someone to tell us what to tell her and then we’ll just tell her that.”
“I like this approach,” Alec nods. “I’ll call Izzy?”
“I’ll put the kettle on,” Magnus smiles.
When Magnus returns to the bedroom with a cup of tea and a mug of coffee, Alec is already fuming in frustration.
“Izzy is not home,” Alec grumbles. “She is in Michigan for a mission, but I can try to call her and-”
“No need to bother her,” Magnus tuts. “Besides, I have a feeling if we call her in the middle of a mission to ask questions about the female reproductive system, she might not take it well.”
He has a point there.
“No worries. I’ll just ring Shinyun,” Magnus shrugs and punches the number on his phone before Alec can protest. “Hello, love. You have a moment to talk?”
He hears Shinyun murmur something in response and Magnus puts the phone on speaker. “So, Alec and I were wondering if we could talk to you about something.”
“Is Max okay?” is her first response.
Alec finds that both annoying and endearing. But he keeps that to himself.
“Max is fine,” Magnus chuckles. “This is, um, actually about Minerva.”
“What’s wrong?” the woman demands immediately, papers rustling on the other end of the call. “Who do I need to kill?”
No one.
Not yet anyway.
“Nothing of the sort,” Magnus chuckles again – more nervously this time. “It’s just that she, er, she got her period.”
“Oh,” Shinyun says and pauses for a moment. “It’s a bit early. But not unusual, I guess.”
“What?” Alec says out loud. “Early? What does that mean? Is something wrong? Is she dying?”
“She is not dying,” Shinyun replies incredulously.
Alec is already googling on his phone when the normal age is to get your period and it says the average is 12 but apparently, some kids get it when they’re 8 and Jesus Christ Alec is not ready for this.
He puts his phone down immediately.
“Have you talked to her about it?” Shinyun inquires now. “Wait. Do you want me to talk to her about it?”
“What? Of course not. Alec and I are completely capable of handling this conversation on our own,” Magnus informs seriously and Alec nods. “We were just wondering if you could tell us what we should tell her.”
“Ah, so I do all the work and you take the credit,” Shinyun hums. “Doesn’t sound very fair.”
“Look,” Alec pinches the bridge of his nose. “We don’t have time for this. Our daughter is bleeding out as we speak, and she needs help.”
“She is not bleeding out,” Shinyun laughs. She laughs at him. “Honestly, if this is how you’re reacting when she got her period, I can’t wait to see how you’ll react when she is giving birth.”
Alec looks at Magnus in horror. Magnus looks like he is going to throw up.
“Where is Minerva anyway?” Shinyun asks.
“She went to school,” Magnus winces. “We didn’t know.”
“And if you had known?” Shinyun asks carefully. “Are you saying she shouldn’t go to school if she is on her period?”
“No one is saying that,” Alec growls. “Are you going to help us or not?”
“Why me?” Shinyun sounds curious.
“Because we trust you with our daughter,” Magnus says fondly the same time Alec says, “Because you’re available.”
Shinyun laughs at that.
Honestly, she has only gotten more insufferable since she and Max started working together. Alec should’ve never let that happen.
“Let me guess,” Shinyun hums. “Isabelle was unavailable?”
“Uh,” Magnus says.
“And if I was busy, you probably would’ve called Clarissa next,” Shinyun notes.
Haha. Jokes on her.
They were going to call Alec’s mom – or Leslie.
“I don’t like what you’re insinuating, Shinyun,” Alec tells her with a frown.
“I’m not insinuating anything, Alex,” Shinyun replies. “I simply find it interesting the two of you are calling every woman in your contact list to learn about menstruation.”
“Oh my god, Alec,” Magnus grabs his arm. “Are we part of the problem?”
“What problem?” Alec groans. “Shinyun. Can you help us or not?”
She hums for a long time like she is thinking about it. Alec wants to fly to London and stick out his tongue at her or something.
“I think you should figure this out yourselves,” she tells him cheerily. “Tata!”
And then she ends the call.
Just like that.
“I honestly don’t know what you see in her,” Alec shakes his head.
“Yes, you do,” Magnus smiles and frowns at his phone. “Okay. Who do we call now?”
“Magnus, we’re calling my mom,” Alec huffs. “Do not let her get into your head!”
“But what if she is right?” Magnus asks with a frown. “Are we simply going to assume only a woman can educate us on this?”
Alec groans. “Baby, I genuinely don’t give a fuck who is going to educate us as long as we get to talk to Minnie about this before she bleeds out to death.”
“She is not going to bleed out to death,” Magnus rolls his eyes and taps something on his phone. “Okay, so NHS says girls bleed about 20-50 milliliters every month.”
“Stop trying to impose the metric system on this family, Magnus, it’s never going to work,” Alec chuckles.
Magnus rolls his eyes a little. “I reckon that’s around 2-5 tablespoons.”
Alec frowns. “That sounds like a lot.”
He immediately goes to the kitchen and grabs a glass and fills it with 5 tablespoons of water.
He blinks.
“Jesus fucking Christ,” Alec says loudly. “She loses this much? Every month? How are women even alive? Are they not going through enough, like, with the patriarchy and shit?”
Magnus chuckles softly. “What now?”
“We need to talk to her,” Alec says decisively.
“We should,” Magnus agrees. “If she is losing so much blood, then it’s possible that she might be iron deficient during her period days and that’s not good, Alec. We should make her eat more greens when she is on her period. You know how that minx is when it comes to leafy greens.”
Alec rolls his eyes fondly.
Their daughter hates any vegetable that is green. Even though Magnus has been trying to trick her into eating them since she was born.
“I can’t believe she hates vegetables but has no problem eating that wretched devil’s fruit,” Magnus grumbles.
Alec has no idea how she could love the damn thing so much when Magnus and Alec physically can’t stand its sight.
God really does work in mysterious ways.
“We’ll talk to her when she gets home from school,” Magnus says now. “But we need to do our research before.”
Alec has already cleared his schedule for the day. He nods. “So, we are calling my mom?”
“Nope,” Magnus replies, and Alec wants to throttle Shinyun. “I’m calling Blueberry.”
“Max?” Alec gapes. “What the fuck does he know about periods?”
“Maybe he’ll surprise us. We shouldn’t assume these things,” Magnus says sagely. “Also, what if she already spoke to him about it?”
Okay. Yeah.
That’s a good point.
Magnus and Alec love their daughter more than anything else. But she does have a bond with Max and Rafael that they can’t quite penetrate with their love.
The three of them are always huddling together and trading secrets and plotting world domination and god knows what else.
Magnus decides to FaceTime Max, as he always does.
They don’t get to see him a lot. Not much at all.
Not just because Max is eternally busy – Magnus blames Alec for it and Alec blames Shinyun – or because Max lives across the Pacific in fucking France of all places. It’s because Max has his own family now and family can consume you.
Not just in terms of your time and money or whatever.
But in terms of…you.
It consumes you.
It becomes your everything and if you are not willing to let it be your everything, then you shouldn’t be doing it.
People can and should be allowed to prioritize themselves and take a break and all that.
But that doesn’t apply when you’re a parent.
Parents don’t get to half-ass shit.
You can make mistakes, yeah. You can want to focus on your own dreams instead of running after your children forever, sure.
But you don’t get to stop caring. You don’t get to stop being a parent.
It doesn’t work like that.
At least that’s how Alec has always seen it.
He had told Max as much when he told them about starting a family a few years ago.
Max didn’t seem to mind all of Alec’s scary foreshadowing. He has always been a sucker for a challenge.
“Blueberry,” Magnus chuckles when the call connects. “Your phone is upside down.”
“No,” Max replies. “I’m upside down.”
Then he jumps down from wherever the fuck he is hanging upside down from – a tree? – and grins at them. “What’s up?”
“Minnie got her period and we’re freaking the fuck out,” Alec informs succinctly.
“Oh shit,” Max says, indicating that he does in fact not know about this development. “Why y’all call me though?”
“Because we trust you with your sister,” Magnus says the same time Alec replies, “Because you’ve seen more vaginas than the rest of this family combined.”
There is some soft swearing in French in the background and a giggle that is followed by ‘papa said a bad word!’.
“Is that my little fruit loop?” Magnus coos immediately. “Let me see! Let me see!”
Max turns his phone and Alec finds David lying down on a blanket with Lance sitting on his chest.
“Are you guys having a picnic?” Magnus asks fondly, resting his head on Alec’s shoulder.
“It’s Lance’s mandatory outdoor hour,” Max informs seriously. “Because he is turning into a little hermit.”
“It was my idea!” David informs.
“I’m sorry, who bought him the PlayStation again?” Max demands and turns back to the phone. “I’d love to help y’all with the period crisis, but I honestly don’t know shit.”
“You are part of the fucking problem, Max,” Alec tuts.
“Stop swearing in front of the child,” Magnus chastises. “Both of you.”
“We are bigger problems than Lance saying fuck,” Max informs. “Arthur has been kidnapped.”
“What?” Magnus clutches his chest.
“And,” Max goes on casually. “The kidnapper wants us to return Lance’s confiscated PlayStation.”
“Before sundown!” Lance yells from somewhere.
“I told you not to let him watch those FBI movies,” David grumbles.
Alec chuckles. “Sounds very serious.”
“Have you checked the laundry basket?” Magnus asks. “I heard, um, kidnappers keep children there.”
“Elyaas is already on it,” Max chuckles.
“You’re not taking this seriously!” Lance complains. “Just give me the PlayStation. What if the kidnappers hurt AJ?”
“Then I guess you’ll have to get used to being an only child,” Max replies. “Right, dad?”
“Right,” Alec says very seriously, putting on his papi voice. “Lance, what if AJ can’t breathe in the laundry basket or something, hm? You have to tell your parents where he is, buddy.”
“Besides,” David hums. “If you’re nice, we’ll buy you a new PlayStation for Christmas.”
“You are not helping!” Max and Magnus both scold the blonde man.
“New PlayStation!” Lance screams and runs away. “I’m coming, AJ!”
Max chuckles and shakes his head. “Sorry, guys. Anyway, tell me if you need help with Minnie?”
“We’re handling it just fine,” Magnus informs. “Alec was, er, just buying tampons on the internet.”
Alec makes a face at that.
“Tampons?” David frowns. “If this is her first period, she might be more comfortable with sanitary napkins. But then again, it depends on her body. She might even want a diva cup. It should be Minerva’s preference of course.”
Alec blinks. Magnus does too.
“Of course,” Magnus says slowly. “There are options for these things. We knew that.”
“Totally,” Alec says. “Okay. Gotta go. Bye.”
They are both quiet for a moment.
“What in god’s name is a diva cup?” Magnus asks in shock.
Alec takes out his phone and starts typing. He stops. “Oh my fucking god.”
“What?” Magnus asks.
“It’s a cup,” Alec groans. “That you put inside the thing.”
“Inside the what?”
“Please don’t make me say it.”
“Why are they putting cups inside their vaginas?” Magnus asks incredulously. “What is going on?”
“I’m more confused than before,” Alec informs.
“Same,” Magnus nods and starts swiping on his phone again.
“Who are you calling now?” Alec asks.
Rafael picks up on the fifth ring, with a mouthful of food. “Hey, bapak.”
“Minerva got her period,” Magnus breaks the news immediately.
“Oh my god,” Rafael almost spits out his food. “When? How? I mean, I know how but like, where is she? Did y’all already talk to her? Did you guys get her what she needs? I read an article yesterday that people actually don’t use real blood when they’re testing sanitary napkins and let me tell you that is some bullshit. Not only does it contribute to the myth that period blood is dirty, but it makes women more ashamed of themselves and their bodies!”
Magnus and Alec are both quiet for a moment.
They have to do it sometimes. Let Rafael get it out of his system. He is used to keeping things on the inside a lot.
“Anyway,” Rafael goes on. “How is she? Does she have cramps or anything?”
“Oh my god,” Magnus says. “Cramps!”
Alec knows about cramps too. He is not completely clueless, thank you very much.
“Does she have them?” Rafael asks again.
“No,” Alec replies. “We have to go though. Bye.”
“Okay so,” Magnus says just as his phone starts to ping with a dozen messages from Rafael, no doubt asking more questions. “Cramps. They’re like these bad tummy aches-”
“I know what cramps are,” Alec rolls his eyes.
“Perhaps we should start there,” Magnus suggests.
Alec grabs his iPad again and Magnus opens YouTube on his phone. Alec reads about exercises and some medication that helps with cramps while Magnus watches a video where a bunch of dudes in a mall are using some stimulator thing to experience period pain.
“That does not look like fun,” Alec winces. “Do you think she is alright in school?”
“I hope so,” Magnus says quietly. “Why do you think she didn’t tell us about it?”
“I dunno,” Alec looks at his hands. “Maybe she was embarrassed?”
“There is nothing embarrassing about this,” Magnus shakes his head and then sighs. “Maybe I should tell her that.”
“We,” Alec corrects with a smile. “We should tell her that.”
Magnus smiles back and presses a kiss to his jaw.
They somehow ended up reading about premenstrual symptoms which makes Alec want to throw his iPad at the wall or something.
“Mood swings? Bloating? Headaches? Acne?” Magnus reads out loud, his voice going higher with every new symptom. “She gets acne? Every month? What sins has our child committed to go through all of this?”
“Well, technically, it goes back to Eve in the Garden of Eden-”
“I will push you off the couch if you bring religion into this,” Magnus warns.
“I don’t get it,” Alec frowns at the dozen tabs open on his iPad. “So, she has premenstrual symptoms, and then there is actual period, which is like four fucking days and sometimes more, and then before she can recover from all that shit, it starts all over again?”
“I want to say I’m so glad I’m not a girl but that sounds very unkind,” Magnus mumbles.
Alec can only agree.
He doesn’t want to imagine men getting their periods.
Of course there were some men who got their periods. But imagine a world where cis men got periods? It would be chaos every month.
Or maybe the world would be perfect, and they’d have free health care.
It could go either way really.
They are both reading an article about early periods – and apparently how normal that is when the front door to the apartment opens.
“Hey.”
The two of them sit up straight on the couch immediately and drop their hands to the sides as if they’ve been caught making out or something.
She walks past them into her room, her backpack slung over her shoulder. She doesn’t look irritated or bloated or anxious.
She just looks like herself. Maybe a little tired.
Wait. No. Those are pre-menstrual symptoms.
She is actually menstruating.
What are the symptoms of that? Other than those horrifying cramps Alec just read about.
“We should say something,” Magnus whispers when she disappears into her bedroom and closes the door behind her.
“Yeah,” Alec sighs as he gets off the couch and pulls Magnus with him.
They walk to the door and knock on it gently, just below the hand-painted sign that says, ‘MJ’s Room’.
“Hey, sweetling,” Magnus says gently as he peeps inside. “Can we come in?”
Minerva, who is already scrolling through her phone – which had been her birthday gift earlier this year, looks up and nods. “Sure.”
“Alec and I wanted to talk to you about something,” Magnus says carefully. “Is now a good time?”
“Yeah,” she replies and puts her phone away. “What’s up?”
Good.
She might have got the secret keeping from her brothers, but at least she has manners.
“Are you sure?” Magnus asks. “Because if you’re feeling unwell, we can talk later-”
“Baby, we know you got your period, we want to talk to you about it,” Alec gets to the point.
She blinks at that and sits up in bed. “Do we have to talk about it?”
“Only to confirm you have access to everything you need,” Magnus interjects.
“I mean, we learned everything in school,” Minerva shrugs. “And I’ve already got my tampons and stuff.”
“And you’re okay with those?” Magnus asks. “Because there are other options, you know.”
“Yep,” Alec nods. “We know all about those.”
Minerva looks amused. She chuckles. “Tampons are fine. I tried using napkins a couple of months ago and it felt kinda weird. Also, I don’t think they’re eco-friendly anyway.”
“Well, there are actually cloth-based reusable napkins you can use,” Magnus says because he did do a lot of research since this morning. “But if you don’t like them-”
“Wait a minute,” Alec frowns. “A couple of months ago?”
Minerva giggles at that. “Daddy, you know I get my period every month, right?”
“Minerva,” Magnus says very seriously then. “When exactly did you get your first period?”
“Just before Christmas,” she replies, her cheeks a little pink.
“Darling, that was months ago!” Magnus gasps. “Why didn’t you tell us?”
“Because if I had told you then, then you’d made a big deal about it, and we wouldn’t have gone on the ski holiday-”
“We wouldn’t have made a big deal,” Alec tells her carefully. “And we definitely wouldn’t have canceled the ski trip. Not when we knew you were really excited about it.”
“Oh,” she says a little dumbly. “Now I feel stupid.”
“It’s not stupid,” Magnus shakes his head and sits down on the edge of the bed. “Are you okay? Do you have cramps?”
She chuckles at that. “Yes, I have cramps.”
“You can tell us about it, you know,” Magnus pushes her hair back from her face.
“It usually doesn’t hurt much,” she shrugs. “I promise I’ll tell you if it hurts really bad.”
“Minnie,” Alec whispers and sits down too. “It doesn’t have to hurt really bad for you to tell someone. Sometimes, it’s okay to tell people if you’re hurting. Even if it’s just a little bit.”
She bites her lip at that. “It hurts a little bit right now.”
“Okay,” Alec says. “What do you want to do?”
“Ice cream?” she grins slowly. “With raisins on top?”
Magnus and Alec groan at the same time. She apparently finds it hilarious.
They get her the ice cream and cuddle up on the couch to watch a K-drama since those are her favorites.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you,” she tells him quietly putting her empty ice cream cup away.
“Is it because you thought we wouldn’t understand?” Magnus asks carefully. “Because you can talk to us about girl stuff.”
“If you don’t wanna talk about it and prefer to talk to a woman, that’s okay too,” Alec notes. “Just keep us in the loop so we don’t get a heart attack next time.”
She frowns at that a little bit and then glares at Magnus. “Did you go through my laundry again?”
“No!” Magnus puts up his hands. Minerva groans and rolls her eyes. “Okay. I’m sorry. I won’t do it again.”
She huffs and lies down on the couch, her head on Magnus’ lap and feet on Alec’s. “I didn’t say anything because it’s not a big deal.”
“Getting your period is not a big deal?” Alec raises an eyebrow.
“Not to me,” she hums. “If I had told y’all, then you would’ve told everyone, and it’d be a whole thing.”
“We didn’t tell anyone,” Alec says quickly, and she narrows her eyes at him.
“Also, this is not about whether it’s big news or not, my love,” Magnus tells her gently. “I don’t tell you every time I get an episode, but I still told you I have depression and how that impacts my life, right? It’s something like that. If it concerns your health, then it’s important to tell the people you care about.”
“Oh,” she says then, like she gets it now.
Alec squeezes her leg a little. She gives him a tiny smile.
They have an understanding between the two of them. They always have.
He sometimes thinks she is the only person who gets Magnus’ depression as much as Magnus does.
Not because she loves him more than others do.
But that’s just Minerva.
She sometimes sees his episodes coming before Magnus can. She knows exactly what to do – and what not to do – when Magnus is going through an episode.
Alec had been a little worried about how to explain it all to her and how she might deal with it.
But she seems to be fine.
In fact, he has been learning a lot from her. All the time.
The best part is that she is never really trying to teach him. And yet, there is so much to learn.
The doorbell rings and Minerva jumps off the couch immediately. “I’ll get it.”
“Baby, be careful!” Alec calls after her, but she is already gone.
Magnus chuckles and shakes his head fondly.
Alec had never meant to call her that.
Baby is for Magnus.
Magnus is baby.
Always.
But it had been inevitable if he is being completely honest with himself.
There is no way he could look at her and not let that word slip off his tongue. There is no way.
He had asked Magnus if it was okay after the first couple of times he had done it.
Magnus had simply chuckled.
“Being your baby is my favorite thing to be. Why wouldn’t I want to share that joy with my Minerva?” Magnus had asked him.
“I love you,” Alec says now, planting a kiss on his head.
“Nice,” Magnus grins.
Alec chuckles at that. “I do though. A lot. I love you so much it gives me cramps in my heart.”
Magnus stares at him for a moment and then buries his face in Alec’s neck. “You are a silly man, Alexander.”
Alec hums at that and presses another kiss on his head, close to his temple.
“We still have work to do though,” Magnus tells him. “We need to read up on this more and familiarize ourselves with the subject.”
“Hm-hm,” Alec agrees. “And we need to go shopping.”
“Tampons?”
“And leafy greens,” Alec notes. “Iron deficiency is not a joke.”
Magnus looks up at that. He groans a little. “You are so hot.”
Alec laughs at that and presses another kiss, on the lips this time.
“You sure you guys didn’t tell anyone?” Minerva asks in an amused tone as she comes back into the living room, carrying a suitcase and what looks like a couple of binders.
She passes them the gigantic binder which is titled ‘Everything You Know Need to Know About Minnie’s Period: A Guide for Dad and Bapak” and puts down the other which is titled “They are Totally Natural and Not Taboo, 21 Things You Need to Know About Your Period: A Guide For Minnie.”
“How Rafe has the time to put these together in one afternoon only the lord knows,” Alec says with an amused eye roll as his daughter opens the suitcase.
“You must be joking if you didn’t think he has been working on this for years,” Magnus chuckles as he already skips through the binder, stopping at a section labeled as ‘Menstrual Hygiene’.
“Oh my God,” Minerva all but screams. “You guys told Max too?”
Alec stares incredulously at the suitcase that is full of period products on one side – napkins, tampons, diva cups and heating pads, and what not. The other side is full of chocolates and cheese from France. And some other gifts too.
“Why is this family so extra?” Minerva demands, all the while putting on what looks like a very comfortable cashmere hoodie that says, ‘Not All People Who Menstruate Are Women’.
“Comes with the last name, baby, we can’t help it,” Alec blows her a kiss.
“I’m going to give up my last name,” Minerva informs them, shoving a big piece of white chocolate into her mouth. Shit looks like it has raisins on it. Ugh.
“Okay,” Magnus grins. “But then you’re gonna have to give up the things that come with the last name too. Like the chocolate you’re munching on right now.”
“But I am in pain,” she pouts and clutches the chocolate to her chest. “It’s my comfort food. This is a coping mechanism.”
Magnus rolls his eyes fondly. “Speaking of pain and food, you need to keep me updated on your menstrual cycle so I can pack more leafy greens for your lunch.”
“Gross, bapak!” their daughter groans loudly. “Daddy, tell him not to be gross!”
“So, that’s a no to spinach sandwiches for breakfast tomorrow?” Alec asks.
Minerva screeches at that and climbs into the couch and tries to shove the raisin chocolate into their mouths as punishment.
He manages to protect his mouth, but his heart though is a little bruised from all the laughter and love.
Alec had always known loving someone too much can hurt.
He had learned that with his little brother. His parents. His siblings. His Magnus. His boys.
But he hadn’t known sometimes – just sometimes – too much love can hurt in a good way too.
Like the burn you feel after a good workout. Like stretch you feel during a good fuck. Like the tears running down your face after a good laugh.
Minerva taught him that.
She had taught him love can hurt and still feel good. That it’s a little magical and inexplicable like that.
That love is an oxymoron and sometimes we should try to live it and feel it instead of trying to make sense of it.
So, Alec feels now. He feels freely.
He feels and he lives, and he doesn’t always force himself to make sense of everything.
It’s one of the lessons he wished he had learned when he was younger.
But, just as with Minerva, it’s never too late to have good things in your life.
“It’s a little weird, isn’t it?” Magnus asks much later that night.
He is sitting in front of the vanity table and putting his hand cream on while Alec reads chapter 2 of the binder - Period Stigma and How Not to Make it Worse.
“Periods?” Alec asks.
“Watching them grow up,” Magnus says, his back to Alec. “You’d think we’d be used to it by now.”
He never thought so.
It’s not something you can ever get used to. He could do it a thousand times and his children still find ways to surprise him.
They still make his heart swell with pride and his stomach fill with laughter. Every passing year comes with a new discovery and Alec is so eternally grateful.
Because he can’t imagine spending his life in any way but this.
Loving his family. Learning new things about them. Then loving them even more.
He wonders if it’s the same for Magnus.
“Weird in a good way?” Alec asks carefully.
Magnus turns around and chuckles. “Of course in a good way. It makes you feel grateful for being alive, doesn’t it? Getting to see someone grow old.”
“It does,” Alec agrees. “You know what else makes me feel grateful?”
Magnus smiles coyly. “You’re going to say something silly.”
“What? Me? Never!” Alec says in mock offense.
Magnus laughs as he climbs into bed and takes the binder from Alec. “What else makes you feel grateful then?”
“You,” Alec replies, because it’s a simple answer. “Your love. Your laughter. Your support.”
“Keep going,” Magnus hums.
“Your lips,” Alec whispers and leans closer.
Magnus smiles against his mouth and closes the gap, kissing him gentle and soft. He pulls back and rests his forehead against Alec’s. “You sound very grateful.”
“I am,” Alec replies, his hand moving to the cross on his chest, praying he’d get to be grateful for longer. “Don’t you forget it, baby.”
The next morning, he finds Minerva up early in the living room, eating her breakfast, while Magnus packs all the chocolates and treats and hygiene products into small bags.
“What are you two doing?” Alec asks as he walks to the kitchen to get his cup of morning coffee.
“Minerva is taking some of it for her friends,” Magnus tells him.
"Friends?" Alec asks.
“I’m not the only who gets cramps,” she replies, as if it's a simple answer.
He watches Magnus and Minerva continue to put the little items into the bags while humming a song together.
Alec smiles.
No one is perfect.
But some people can get really fucking close.