Chapter Text
Kris is lonely.
Loneliness has plagued them all their life. Even in the earliest years of their existence, the loneliness is something their memory can grasp onto. The resentment and detachment from their birth parents had been their first taste of this bitter feeling.
They said their eyes were too red, too much like blood, too unnatural...too demonic. It didn't matter how hard they tried to appease them, there was no convincing their twisted human minds. It wouldn't be long before they found themself abandoned on the side of a mountain..... the loneliness creeps in like the shadows lurking in the forest shrub.
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Kris is lonely.
They thought their new life in Hometown with a wonderful new adopted family and friends would be the end of the empty ache in their heart. Yet here they are again. And it did, for a bit. No amount of family lunches at the diner or the numerous pranks pulled on their neighbors could overtake the devastation about to hit them.
The disappearance of their friend Noelle's older sister, December "Dess" Holiday, sent a ripple wave affect through the town, in turn, their lovely family.
Their father, Asgore, as chief of police and in charge of the search for December, was fired for his supposed inadequate leadership during the case. Their happily married mother and father, torn apart by financial ruin and grief. They watched their father with his packed bags exit the house in the dark of night, a sad smile adorned on his face as he waved goodbye for now. They spent the rest of the night under their bed sheets as the sun rose.
They can here their mother crying through her cracked bedroom door.
Their relationship with their once best friend Noelle could never be the way it was before. They didn't mean to, they really tried, but it was just easier to let things drift apart. Whenever they went over to Noelle's house after the fact, their emotions would run so high they would flee to her piano room and express it through that instead. It never got better, but it never quite got worse. Friends grow apart sometimes, right? That's just life.
Coward
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Kris lives in the shadow of their own brother
As they've gotten older, they've come to find, this town... really loves Asriel. He's a bit of the town's golden boy, singing in the choir at church, the star of the track team, a town darling. The monsters of this town tend to love comparing them to their older brother.
Kris can't fault them entirely, they can hear their whispers and the strain in their voice as they try to persuade them to just act a bit more like Asriel. They can't help it though, it's just the way they are. Just a little bit creepy and mischievous is just how they tend to be. They don't feel like doing all these extra activities. They'd much rather spend time eating their mother's delicious pies and playing the piano.
Kris could never fault Asriel for the townsfolks thoughts though, not when they know the truth. Not when they've seen him break down after Dess's disappearance. Not with how quick he was out doing even more after school activities, volunteering and college prep. But Kris could see the truth. See their older brother throwing himself at as much as he could do to keep the emotions at bay. Kris couldn't help but wonder if in that moment, Asriel felt lonely too
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Even with his busy schedule, Asriel always made time for them. But now they're watching him step on a bus, bags in hand and a warm smile on his face. He's off for college and there's a small farewell party cheering him on as he waves a temporary goodbye. Their mother, Toriel, stands proud with a handkerchief to dab the tears streaming down her face. Kris stands blank faced, body ever so slightly shaking. Their brother was their rock, a warm light in the dark. They're afraid to let go, but they finish off their hug and watch as the bus shrinks as it drives down the mountain taking their best friend away.
Kris feels alone
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Kris' house is lonely
Don't get them wrong, they love their mother, but the house just doesn't feel right as it does now. It isn't too hard for them to see the emptier house weighs on the mind of their mother. A pang of regret rushes through their aching heart whenever they hear her crying behind her closed bedroom door. Or whenever they have to help her get back to her bed after a night of drinking her sorrows away. They can never seem to fault their mother in the moment, afterall. She's lonely too.
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Their choices don't matter. Does anybody's choices matter? Or is it just theirs that don't?
They've stopped putting the all their effort in, stopped trying to change a thing in their life when it just drags them around despite whatever actions they put forth. In the end it won't matter they'll just let the world continue on around them
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School can be lonely at times They wouldn't say they have a bad relationship with any of their classmates. Things just aren't what they used to be and it's easier to just go home and sleep the rest of the day away, after munching on some (or all) of their mom's pie of course.
Lately things have changed though. A new girl named Susie has recently moved to Hometown and has decided to make Kris her target for bullying. Kris knows it's cause of their silent demeanor and lack of will to really fight back. Yet, Kris doesn't mind her all that much, they can see there's something more in there than just a mean girl. So they can't help but be amused whenever she tries to get under their skin. They can't help but wonder is she's projecting her own wounds onto another.
Maybe she's just lonely too.