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The whole reason why the friend group intervenes in Chan and Mingyu when they fight is, because, they’re housemates too.
“Chan-ah” Mingyu pleads, “I don’t want to bring back the past or talk about what happens between our walls- I mean - our home’s walls” Mingyu’s skin displays a bright red, clearly very embarrassed and Chan can’t keep up.
Chan has his particular rotting phase that happens every three to four months, where he feels like he doesn’t deserve his friends or that his friends are too much for him even though nothing went out of the ordinary. And during this time, he loathes talking to Mingyu. He simply would not want to talk about insecure he is because insecurity is the only answer to feeling like he doesn’t deserve his friends. And admitting you’re insecure and causing a scene is the most embarrassing thing after keeping everything bottled up nice and good for the said three to four months.
This pushes him into a cycle of doing everything Mingyu does in the morning just ten minutes later so that their morning routine doesn’t coincide and Chan can avoid Mingyu as a whole or have a spot excuse that is, “I’m running late, I slept in a little” even though he’s never running late. Sure, his rotting phase can suck but Chan would never let it get in the way of his career. In fact, his rotting phase is when he’s more productive than any other day.
But again, Mingyu is good, too good to be true. So he waits for Chan to sit for breakfast, for ten minutes he just sits and stares at Chan hurriedly covering his bread with peanut butter and jelly. Probably Mingyu felt the need to do so because Chan simply ran away after Mingyu embarrassed himself with a bad sex joke the previous night.
Chan makes a quick decision, goes ‘fuck it, we ball’ and puts the toast in a box and shoves it in his bag before walking to get his keys and shoes until-
“I can’t keep up with you, Chanie” Mingyu, holding his wrist. “Talk to me, please”
“Huh, talk about what, hyung?” Chan mutters as he tries to smile which worsens it because Mingyu’s pout is very much visible now and Chan feels like he’s crumbling inside.
“You’re in your upset phase, and every time I would just let it go but this time it’s a little-” Mingyu clears his throat, “personal”
Chan almost forgot his spot excuse! “I’m sorry hyung, can we talk later? I’m running late. I have my presentation in two days and my crew-”
“I asked Yeonjun and he said your practice starts at 10 am and it’s only 8.45 am, so you can very well talk to me since it won’t take anything more than 20 mins to reach your studio” Oh, now, Mingyu is planning this so Chan wouldn’t even have a sliver of an escape. Oh, he hates his Mingyu hyung because he’s too good.
And if things weren’t already hard enough, his Mingyu hyung is too good in bed too! Sure, Seokmin is always ready to bite his ass for getting it on with Mingyu right after they ended but who can resist Mingyu and his whole thing with being a good boy?
Chan could guess that by ‘personal’ Mingyu meant how his rotting phase started right after he spent a night with Mingyu and his boyfriend Jihoon. But again, talking about insecurities is so embarrassing and he cannot even start talking about how he feels insecure when he’s in bed with the two hottest people known to the friend group. And of course, the cherry on top is they are dating, and are in a healthy relationship which is heaven when Chan’s life is in the middle section of the seventh circle in hell.
“Please, talk to me” and by now, Chan physically can’t utter a word that starts with a n and ends with an o and is not nacho. He felt his throat starting to constrict, a fucking weakling he is.
Mingyu after taking Chan’s silence for a yes, directed them to the couch and got Chan a glass of water when a teardrop actually slipped down his eyelid. Soon, Mingyu’s weight leaned on him, big hands hugging his waist in an ‘oh so poor and innocent’ way.
“I just, I’m exhausted and the practice is getting out of hand” Chan muttered, if Mingyu thought even with these nice gestures he could get Chan to talk about his problem, he was terribly wrong. Chan already feels like an unwanted pot of flowers with ugly colored petals in a florist shop, and he can’t go on about how all his friends are the most picked ones and even the ones who thought would probably remain unpicked and stay with him for a while getting picked triggered a very new sense of fear in Chan that he’d never have the life he wants and would always remain in his ugly pot and will never move to a bouquet with other flowers and remain useless and forgettable.
And he can never imagine telling Mingyu he thought of another flower being as unpickable as him, which is so big-headed of himself.
“You can always take a break, do you want me to talk to Yeonjun so we can reschedule your practice a little bit so you have some time for yourself both mentally and physically?” Mingyu’s palm soothingly rubbed along Chan’s side, but the voice in his head was very objectifying and he could only think of himself as a pot that couldn’t feel a touch.
“It’s fine, hyung. It’s just a slump, I’ll get over it in a day or so.” Chan moved, trying to put even a two-centimeter gap between himself and Mingyu but it seemed too impossible with how tight Mingyu’s big biceps were holding him.
“If it’s a slump, I’ll make you talk to Jihoonie. Not a slump another artist who can’t understand” Mingyu smiled a little and Chan wanted to melt into a puddle and get absorbed by the couch leather. “Also that makes up for you avoiding us in general, I’ll call Jihoon home tonight.” Mingyu then proceeds to press a kiss to his temple and walk away with his model smile. Chan’s collar feels wet, and so does the back of his knees.
Chan’s escape plan #2 included actually hitting himself on his shower head and fainting so he’d be asleep when Jihoon gets home and the injury would speak for himself, ending up in him being left alone which is still better than two hot guys who are also his friends doing their best to bring out the cringe parts of himself. But again, he didn’t lie when he said he had a presentation in two days, and going to the presentation with a band-aid on his forehead was worse.
Escape Plan #1 was obviously to say he has plans with some non-existent being just to go and rot in the practice room until it’s covered with his stench, which got ruined quickly when Mingyu sat down in the living room to watch a disgustingly straight matchmaking show. Mingyu is such an oxymoron for being gay and watching stereotypical straight stuff. But Mingyu in the living room means he can’t easily make fake plans and pass through at least ten very Asian-mom questions.
As he was thinking of plan #3, the doorbell rang and Chan had already regretted desiring anything and everything in his whole life.
“Chanie, Jihoon is here” Mingyu’s voice rang through the house, along with the TV being switched off and Jihoon’s chortle sounds.
Chan was already in bed, if the least escape he could pretend to be asleep, he would pretend to be asleep. He pulled the comforter over his head and faced away from the door to his room.
“Chan-ah?” it was Jihoon’s voice now, he was probably standing at the doorway which is fine. Jihoon isn’t someone who’s too pushing like Mingyu is. He’d probably just go back and have some fun with his boyfriend.
But that’s obviously not what happened, and Jihoon chose to slide in the comforter and wrap an arm around Chan’s middle as his black baby hair tickled Chan’s nape, making it harder for him to pretend to be asleep.
“Mingyu told me you’re not feeling good, lied about being in a slump and stuff.” oh, so, now they know that’s also a lie. What one thing Chan can execute correctly? “I don’t know if you’re sleeping or not but I want to tell you a few things, even if you’re asleep now I’ll repeat these words when you’re awake. But I just want you to listen, not talk. I’m not going to force you to talk”
Chan breathed out a little harshly, and if at all it gives Jihoon a clue about how he’s not asleep, it doesn’t matter because he knows Jihoon won’t point it out. “You remember the time when you were so pissed at Seungcheol hyung for babying you even when you were not at a babying age? Uff, that was too cute of you. But I also see that, when everyone saw you as a baby your very normal teenage desire of wanting to become an adult soon only increased. And I take the blame, we probably pushed it too much to the point that you only know to act like an adult now.” Jihoon’s hand climbed up his back, from his waist to the back of his shoulders, caressing his skin. “It’s okay to act like a child, Chan-ah, especially if it involves something like being sulky about things your friends do, it’s okay. Sometimes it’s better when you don’t always search for reasons”
Chan felt himself tear up for the second time the same day, and when Jihoon’s caressing got softer and softer, he felt the wetness of his pillow where a puddle of his tears sat. His breathing was definitely a lot more ragged and by now no way Jihoon doesn’t know he’s already awake. But he doesn’t care and lets himself sob harder, the puddle growing larger, the caressing comes along with kisses along his nape.
Silence followed until his breathing became a little better and his nose could not be more runny. Jihoon had his lips pressed to his nape, slow kisses felt the best especially when they were from Jihoon.
And because the moment was too perfect, something had to ruin it, and it was Jihoon’s phone dinging at Mingyu’s text saying the drinks were ready. Jihoon cleared his throat as he showed Chan the text, and Chan knows he took a total of at least two minutes until his swollen eyes worked better for him to read the text, but it was fine because it was Jihoon.
“If you don’t want to, you can say no. But the drinks are just to bring the child out in you, you can rant about everything else just like how you ranted about Wonwoo to us months ago. I think that’s the most child Lee Chan we’ll ever get.” Jihoon’s voice was unbearably soft and Chan had to try hard to not tear up again, at least not until there was alcohol in his system.
“Hyungie” he called out, and the hoarsity of his voice showed how drained he felt on the inside. “I love you” he managed to say, though the small voice never stopped talking about how unworthy he and his stupid love is, he knows even if it was like a exhale in a windstorm, Jihoon had to know that Chan had exhaled it out.
“Love you too, Chan-ah”
The next morning, Chan woke up with a big headache and two big hands around him, one belonging to his housemate and the other to his housemate’s boyfriend.
Chan vaguely remembered the nonsense he yelled when alcohol was in his system, he didn’t even leave the ugly flower pot nonsense out for which Mingyu kissed him on the lips.
“Hm, Chanie, get back to sleep. It’s Saturday and your practice starts late in the afternoon.” Mingyu’s hands moved from his shoulders to his eyes, trying to close them clumsily.
“Shh, shut up” Jihoon, who’s very sensitive to sounds when he’s asleep, moved his hands from Chan’s waist to close Mingyu’s mouth which was on the spot with zero clumsiness.
But now, Chan really wanted the arms around him and whatever spell Jihoon and Mingyu put him under, he was bold enough to pull the hands back to himself because he needed it. And he could care a little less about the small voice in the back of his head, the two hot men’s spell was really that strong.
“Aw, look at you” Mingyu, voice so full of love, breath a tad bit stinky, proceeded to place a kiss on his cheek. Chan had no intentions of pushing him away.
“Aw, you two” Jihoon, also full of love, breath a tad bit stinky but definitely stronger at the moment pulled Chan in and kissed him on his lips and Chan could only smile into it.
Nothing more needed to be said, not even the three miserable words that were itching Chan’s lips. Maybe later, they have all the time in the world.