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“When can you order Noah’s school pictures?” Elliot asked from his spot on her office couch, reclined back with his feet up on the table, phone in hand and readers perched on the tip of his nose like he owned the place.
This had been his “thing” the past few weeks since he’d returned from his latest undercover job—dropping by her office whenever he had a free moment and just hanging out. He initially thought he’d be gone until at least January, but then two rival gang leaders killed each other in an honest-to-God duel. And while it made for a huge pile of paperwork, it did bring him home a lot faster.
“Uh, I don’t know,” Olivia said. “Whenever he brings the form home. I usually only get one or two as keepsakes. Why?”
“Can you get me a wallet size?” Elliot asked, squinting down at his phone.
“Why?” Olivia asked.
“For my wallet,” Elliot said, looking up at her over the phone and the rims of his glasses like it was the most obvious thing in the world.
Olivia couldn’t help but look at him like he’d lost his mind.
“Nobody keeps pictures in their wallets anymore, Grandpa,” Olivia said.
“Well call me old fashioned then, but I still do,” Elliot said, sliding his phone back into his pocket.
“And you want a picture of my kid because…?” Olivia asked.
“I have pictures of all the kids and the grandkids in there,” Elliot said. “Maureen gets me new ones of Kieran and Seamus every year.”
“Noah isn’t your kid,” Olivia said.
“No, he’s yours,” Elliot said. “Don’t try to act like you don’t still have that picture of you and Eli from his baptism somewhere. You had that in your desk drawer for years.”
Olivia’s cheeks flamed.
“Fine, fine,” she said. “I’ll get you one when the form comes in.”
True to her word, when the prints came back she’d gotten a sheet of wallet sizes and clipped one out for Elliot. She figured she could send the rest in a few select Christmas cards at the end of the year to Nick and the Carisis. Maybe even to Barba if she felt like trying to make up.
“Thanks, Liv,” Elliot said, sliding his wallet out to put the picture inside. “Hey, you gonna be here a while? Want to order in Woo Hop?”
Olivia looked down at the pile of paperwork she still had to do and knew it was going to take two hours at least.
“Woo Hop sounds great,” Olivia said.
“Here,” Elliot said, tossing her his wallet. “I’m going to run to the bathroom. Food’s on me. Go ahead and order. I can go pick it up if delivery’s going to take too long.”
Olivia pulled up the DoorDash app and ordered their usual from last time. What Elliot didn’t know was she already had his credit card saved along with hers in the app.
It only took a few seconds to confirm delivery to the 1-6. Rather than turning back to the paperwork she didn’t want to do, Olivia opened Elliot’s wallet instead and pulled out the photo sleeve. True to his word, he had each of his kids’ senior photos in there, the latest ones of Kieran and Seamus, and then Noah’s that she’d just handed him. After the school photos, there was his parents’ wedding photo followed by his and Kathy’s wedding photo.
Despite everything that Olivia knew about Kathy and even Joe Stabler now, the photos still made her smile. She liked that he felt the need to keep them close to him.
But what she saw in the very last slot in the photo sleeve made her heart beat rapidly in her chest. It was a picture John had taken of them in the squad room in 2006 or 2007. El was sitting in his desk chair and she was behind him, arms thrown over his shoulders, chin resting on the top of his head. His hands had come up to meet hers where they were clasped in the middle of his chest. Both of them had huge smiles on their faces.
She should have been listening for his footsteps to come back. She should have shoved the photo sleeve back in his wallet, put it on the corner of her desk, and acted like she didn’t see anything. But her brain couldn’t make the rest of her body cooperate.
“Delivery time’s going to be that long, huh?” Elliot asked, striding back into the room.
Then he clocked what was in her hand.
“How long… When did you… There’s a picture of us in your wallet,” Olivia said.
“Yeah?” Elliot said like she shouldn’t sound so confused.
“Why?” Olivia asked.
“I think it has something to do with my military days,” Olivia said. “We kept pictures of the people we loved in our vests so they’d always be with us, even in combat. And then when I got out of the force it just sort of stuck.”
“No, not why do you have pictures,” Olivia said. “But why do you have a picture of us?”
“Why wouldn’t I?” Elliot asked.
“We’re not… It’s not the same thing as…” Olivia said, searching for the words.
“I’ve told you more than once, Liv,” he said. “You’re family.”
“When did you put this in there?” she asked.
“I don’t know,” Elliot said. “I think the date’s on the back.”
He reached to take the sleeve from her and pulled the picture out.
“Yeah, 2007,” he said, looking at his chicken scratch scrawled on the back. “I put it in there when Munch gave it to me.
“And it’s just been in there this whole time?” Olivia asked. “Even when you were in Italy?”
“Especially when I was in Italy,” he said. “But it’s not like you didn’t used to have a picture of us in your living room.”
She did. She even left it up after he was gone until William Lewis smashed the frame.
“And I see I’ve made your blotter collage now,” Elliot said, jutting his chin toward her desk. “If you have pictures of us why wouldn’t I?”
“You were married,” Olivia said.
“Being married didn’t mean you didn’t matter to me, Liv,” Elliot said. “You have to know that.”
“It wasn’t right,” she said.
“Maybe not,” he said. “But it didn’t change how I felt. It didn’t change that you were my partner, and my best friend, and I wanted to keep you close to me, just like my family.”
Olivia felt her cheeks flush as she absentmindedly reached up to touch her compass necklace.
“You know, Elliot,” she said. “I don’t think I told you that I missed you when you were gone.”
“I missed you too,” he said. “But I’m not going anywhere. Not again. And if I do, I’m taking you with me.”
“Is that a promise, Detective?” she asked.
“You can count on it, Captain,” he said.