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The baby monitor came to life with a slight crackle, waking Dean from his sleep. He groaned and buried his face in his pillow. He loved Emma with all his heart, he really did, but he wished that she would sleep through the night, even just once. He had become all too familiar with these midnight wake-up calls in the few months he’d had Emma.
Honestly, he wouldn’t trade these past few months for anything in the world, he thought as he rubbed the vestiges of sleep from his eyes. Emma may have been a surprise, but the minute he met her, he fell in love. And when Lydia offered him full custody of their daughter, he gladly accepted without a second thought.
It was just a little tiring, that was all. Being a single dad was no easy feat. He was lucky enough to have a good support system, but even then he wished he just had someone to help him raise Emma, someone to share the responsibilities of parenthood with. Someone that he could force out of bed on a night like tonight with his incessant grumbling about how he did it last time. And as he swung his feet over the side of the bed, he thought about who, exactly, he would want to fill that gap.
It was impossible, of course. For all he knew, Cas was straight. But that didn’t stop him from daydreaming about what life would be like if they were together. Probably similar to how it was now, actually, just with the added bonus of sex on a semi-regular basis, maybe. Cas was already staying with them while his house was being renovated, so barely anything would have to change at all. He would go from sleeping on the pull-out couch to in bed with Dean, but that was it. Not a hard transition at all, really.
Dean continued to plod down the hall, half-asleep and lost in his thoughts. It wasn’t until he was outside Emma’s nursery that he noticed she was no longer crying. He peeked inside the room and felt his heart skip a beat. There was Cas, cradling a tiny Emma in his arms and rocking her slowly. Emma’s eyes drooped as Cas began to sing a soft lullaby to her, coaxing her to sleep with what Dean immediately recognized as Hey, Jude.
Fuck. Dean never meant to fall this hard for his best friend, but it was hard not to. He looked so perfect in there with Emma, the pinnacle of domesticity. Dean would give practically anything to see that scene every night. He stared for a while longer at the scene before him before heading back down the hall to his room. While he loved Cas, he didn’t want to risk losing his best friend with any spur-of-the-moment confessions. Those could wait for another day.
But if Dean had just stayed a little bit longer, or perhaps if Cas had stood a little closer to the baby monitor, he would have heard Cas confiding in Emma, telling her how much he desperately wished he could be a part of her family. But as it was, all Dean heard through the baby monitor was Cas whispering a gentle I love you as he lowered Emma into her crib and kissed her goodnight. He fell asleep imagining Cas saying the same to him.