Chapter Text
Blade, throughout his life, has perpetually fought fire with fire.
Or rather, it just seems Blade has an insatiable desire to embrace the searing flames.
As much as it pains Blade to acknowledge, the first person he gazes upon awakening is the sole entity that ignites the fervent emotions within him. And without a doubt, the most exquisite being he has ever encountered.
He encounters a familiar man adorned with lustrous, flowing black hair, two beautiful horns gracing his head, and eyes of such vivid emerald hue that one might question why they’ve not been fashioned into a precious necklace yet.
As Blade's eyes fixate on the man in front of him, his gaze shifts towards the windows for a moment. It reflects his own face and body. However, what he sees is both familiar and unfamiliar, a mortal version of himself. With a silver hair. It's undeniably him, yet somehow not quite him.
In that very moment, Blade realizes that he has been transported to a different time, no longer in his own era, occupying his own physical body, or existing within his familiar world.
It's at this exact point that he finally comes face to face with the person he has relentlessly pursued. His sole purpose back then was to terminate, to extract retribution, and to ensure that this person pays the price for their transgressions. However, Blade knows deep down that this person is not exactly who he has been searching for, yet somehow, they are connected.
"Yingxing? Are you awake?" a voice, not belonging to the man who is still staring at him, asks from somewhere nearby. There are other voices inquiring about his well-being and whether he is experiencing any pain or discomfort, but Blade is unable to fully grasp their meaning.
However, amidst the cacophony, the only voice that resonates with Blade is the one stating, "You were on the brink of death."
"I'm fine," Blade manages to utter, though the sound of his own voice causes him to wince. His voice is hoarse, his throat is sore, and even his arms ache as if they have been bruised.
"See? I told you, Dan Feng, you should stop worrying about your lover. He's stronger than you know," comments a familiar man, someone who eerily resembles Jing Yuan. However, he appears younger than the one Blade has encountered before.
"Lieutenant Jing Yuan," a knight calls out to him. "Apologies for the interruption. They’ve been searching for you."
Blade's observation prompts the realization that Jing Yuan holds the rank of lieutenant, rather than a general.
This Dan Feng reluctantly extends his hand towards Blade's hand.
"Yingxing?" Dan Feng calls as if trying to confirm his name.
And for a fleeting moment, the name strikes a chord of familiarity within Blade. It ignites a sense of connection, evoking a feeling of belonging.
Blade hesitates for a moment before responding, "Yes?"
"Thank you for saving my life."
Blade requires no explanation for the fact that the body he currently inhabits is intricately entwined in a profoundly affectionate and intimate relationship with Dan Feng, a revered High Elder.
Dan Feng is a figure of admiration, someone who carries the weight of responsibility towards those around him.
The intensity of their connection must be so tangible that it gets the attention of all who cross their path. Even from a mere ten feet away, people cannot help but smile in their presence, eagerly anticipating their next move.
Blade is left feeling a little confused by how Dan Feng keeps avoiding him all the time, ever since Blade woke up. He doesn’t even know him. And it's not like Blade wants Dan Feng to be by his side constantly, but it feels awkward when his supposed lover in this world doesn't even acknowledge him.
Blade doesn't have any reason to stay here. He also doesn't have any solution on how to get out of here. So there's that.
"Don't worry, we think Dan Feng's just a little upset with you. He’ll come around soon," Jing Yuan remarks out of the blue. "He's never been great with expressing himself, you know?"
"Why's he mad at me?" Blade questions, completely clueless. He's desperately trying to convince himself that this is all just a bad dream, but he doesn't even know where to begin.
"Mhm, the mountains incident? When you tried to save him?" Jing Yuan says as if it should be obvious. He lets out a sigh when he notices Blade's continued confusion. "He just doesn't appreciate being rescued from situations that pose no real threat to him. Especially not by you."
Blade's chest tightens upon hearing that. "And why is that?"
"Because he values your life more than you realize," Jing Yuan explains, his voice filled with sincerity.
Blade responds without hesitation, "And I value his life just as much."
Jing Yuan chuckles heartily, his laughter echoing through the area. "We're all aware of that, but remember, he's immortal and you're not, Yingxing. It's important to consider his perspective as well. You can't always be stubborn and arrogant."
Blade's peaceful pretense of being Yingxing abruptly ends when he finds himself truly annoyed with Dan Feng over something as simple as a jade pendant.
"That's mine," Dan Feng declares, crossing his arms over his chest.
"Oh yeah? Too bad it's mine, Princess," Blade retorts, not even sure why he's bothering with this.
Blade doesn't even know if this is really Yingxing’s.
Moreover, Blade can't remember how it all happened. Out of nowhere, Dan Feng snatches the pendant from Blade's hand while he's staring at it.
Blade remembers seeing it on the table in Yingxing's room. And Blade's kind of sure that it looks similar to the one he has in his possession in his real body. However, only the color is exactly the same.
But still, it was in Yingxing's room. So it must be his, right? It kind of makes sense.
"Princess?" He scoffs. "Whatever, it's mine," Dan Feng emphasizes the word 'mine' as if he's ready to fight for it.
Blade can't help but laugh at the ridiculousness of the situation. "Then why is it in my room?" Blade taunts him.
"Oh, I don't know," Dan Feng whispers, looking around before getting close to Blade's ear. "Maybe because we're lovers, you took off my clothes, along with that jade, and now I left it in your room? Ever thought about that?"
Blade is speechless. He can't come up with a response. He doesn't even want to come up with anything.
"A-Alright, it's yours," Blade gives in, just wanting to get out of there.
That’s not the only time Blade finds himself wanting to strangle Dan Feng figuratively.
There's this one moment when Dan Feng suddenly puts him in a headlock.
"Your arm is quite heavy, Dan Feng," Blade complains.
"So, you want to break up with me, is that it, Yingxing?"
"What? You're the one strangling me?"
Unexpectedly, Dan Feng bursts into laughter and playfully pecks Blade's ear. "Sorry for strangling you, sweetheart. By the way, have I ever told you that you have a charming mole behind your ear?" Dan Feng asks. "I feel tempted to bite it."
"Dan Feng, my deepest apologies for asking, but are you quite right in the head?"
"Yes, I am," Dan Feng answers with a nod. "By the way, Yingxing, are you the one who ties up your hair?"
"Yes..."
"Ah! That makes sense as to why it looks hideous. Have a good day!"
With that, Dan Feng abruptly walks away, leaving Blade feeling frustrated and on the verge of punching himself.
Alright. This has got to be the ultimate payment for every single one of Blade’s past and present sins combined.
"Yingxing, would you be able to construct a house for me?" Dan Feng inquires of Blade, as they sit together in front of their meals, locked within a carriage starskiff. "Specifically, I'm seeking a small house that would comfortably accommodate the two of us. My vision for this dwelling includes a roofed area where we can enjoy each other's company, savoring the pleasure of shared drinks while gazing at the enchanting moon."
This marks some of the final desperate attempts and ultimate endeavors of their close friends here. It's to encourage them to communicate and rekindle, as they say, their affectionate bond.
Blade diverts his gaze from the food to Dan Feng, utterly perplexed and unable to comprehend the situation at hand.
"Excuse me?" Blade isn't even sure if he's heard that right.
"I said, make us a house." Dan Feng clicks his tongue like he shouldn't even be explaining this. "You possess a renowned reputation as a skilled craftsman in this area."
"Of weaponry."
"Huh? Are you implying that you're incapable of constructing a simple abode for me?" Dan Feng questions, his tone suggesting an accusation. "Is it possible that you no longer hold any affection for me?"
Blade lets out a sigh. Relationships certainly prove to be challenging, even when one is not in their own body.
The irony of Blade’s situation becomes more astounding, as every single day passes by.
There is also something truly intriguing about being in a relationship with an individual who bears an uncanny resemblance to the very person you have relentlessly sought to eliminate for countless years.
Somewhere in the depths of Blade's mind, he acknowledges the stark contrast between his current existence and the memories of his past life. It's like two completely different worlds colliding within his thoughts.
Being in a small and joyful gathering, surrounded by familiar yet distinct faces from his current reality, Blade finds himself somewhat disoriented.
Suddenly, a charming lady with a foxy appearance approaches him, greeting him with a warm smile. Blade remembers overhearing the others calling her Baiheng.
Baiheng playfully remarks, "You've been courting Dan Feng for months, and then you suddenly bump your arrogant little head, and you've done nothing but fight with the love of your life for the past few days. And now, you're not even speaking to him? That's quite perplexing, young man."
"I courted him... for months?" Blade asks in disbelief.
"Yes! Did the rocks that strike your head cause this memory loss?" she exclaims. "You've been seeking my advice for months, constantly asking, 'Baiheng, Baiheng! Should I give him flowers? Should I ask him out on a date? Should I confess my feelings?' and so on."
Blade murmurs quietly, almost to himself, "So we're truly together."
Baiheng chuckles heartily. "You still can't believe it, huh?" she asks. "A reliable source informed me that you pursued him relentlessly. But honestly, it was only a matter of time."
"Pursued him?" Blade questions, his voice filled with surprise. "So he was forced—"
"No," Baiheng interrupts, knowing what Blade is thinking. "Dan Feng was head over heels for you. And he still is. He's just... trained to be strict and unfeeling. It's all he's ever known as the High Elder."
"You make it sound like that's a bad thing," Blade comments.
Baiheng smiles serenely. "You allow him to experience a range of emotions. Anger, fear, dissatisfaction, happiness, and even love."
"I don't know how to do that." He's not even Yingxing.
"Don't worry, just be yourself. And I understand that we asked you both to refrain from public displays of affection, but there's no need to display your other forms of tension in front of us."
Blade gazes at her intently.
"Very well, Yingxing. Smile a little. No need to be so serious."
"Baiheng," Blade starts, his voice filled with uncertainty.
Blade knows absolutely nothing about this mysterious lady standing before him. However, there's an inexplicable feeling deep within him that compels him to trust her.
"Yes?"
A hint of vulnerability lingers in his voice as he asks, "Would you actually believe me if I told you that I've genuinely lost my memory?"
Baiheng blinks, his eyes reflecting a mix of surprise and concern. Slowly, he reaches out and gently clasps Yingxing's hand.
"Of course, my dear. I always believe you. Tell me more."
"I can't remember Dan Feng. Or this life, or anything that's happened to me. To us," Blade admits, his words a mix of truth and deception. "But there's this indescribable feeling inside me, you know? It's like I would give up my very soul if it meant I could grant him life."
"So, your heart still holds onto him anyway," Baiheng says softly. "Never mind what your mind says. It'll all work out. I can guide you through this, but I suggest you have a conversation with Dan Feng—"
"I can't—"
Baiheng tightens her grip on his hand. "It's okay, only when you're ready. He's the one you made a promise to, the one who will stand by your side. Trust him."
During that same party, there’s a moment of tranquility as a slow dance commences. Everyone gracefully moves towards their partners, creating an enchanting atmosphere.
Amidst this dreamlike ambiance, Blade's gaze consistently falls upon Dan Feng’s captivating figure. He’s always surrounded by people, engaging in conversations, and has never been seen alone.
However, Blade still experiences a profound sense of emptiness lurking within Dan Feng's gaze. It is as though he stands before everyone, yet remains an intangible shadow that eludes anyone's grasp.
Perhaps it’s the exhaustion from lack of sleep, the frustration of being clueless, or the yearning to escape from this place, but Blade finds himself yearning to be next to him.
Blade just can’t help but think that if he were Yingxing, what actions would he take right now? Would he gather the courage to approach Dan Feng and request his hand for a dance? Would he be by his side? Would he be truly his?
Blade doesn't need to think much as Dan Feng comes towards him with a serious expression. It's a face that Blade desires to caress softly, even if just for a brief moment. It gives off a feeling like whispers from a distant star, touching Blade's soul deeply, even from this far away.
There's a part of Blade that silently pleads to comprehend and be in the company of Dan Feng for as long as he can. However, Blade understands that it's not his place to do so.
"Would you care to dance with me?" Dan Feng whispers softly.
"I'm afraid I don't know how to dance," Blade declines, not wanting to be in close proximity to him.
A smile graces Dan Feng's lips, a rare sight that seems to stretch on for an eternity in Blade's perception. "It's not a competition, silver hair. Or perhaps you're simply apprehensive?" Dan Feng suggests.
Blade feels a spark ignite within him. "I'm not afraid of dancing, you... with the long black hair... and horns," he returns, unsure what the declaration of their respective hair color even means.
With determination, Blade approaches Dan Feng, guiding him toward the center.
They find themselves standing on the uneven pavement, surrounded by a melodic hum. Blade tries to ignore the effect of Dan Feng's touch on his hand, though it secretly unsettles him. The music fades into the background as if the world around them ceases to exist.
Blade’s finger brushes against Dan Feng's, feigning ignorance of the inexplicable enchantment that has befallen him.
They sway together, their steps out of sync, and Dan Feng nearly stumbles on the hem of his coat.
"You can step on my feet," Blade teases. "Everyone's watching, and they shouldn't witness the High Elder falling flat on his face."
"You're exaggerating. It's embarrassing enough that I'm dancing with you," Dan Feng retorts.
"Oh, is that because you've been avoiding me for days?" Blade questions with a slight grin.
Dan Feng sighs. "No, it's because everyone has been telling me that you've been staring at me as if you wanted to devour me all this time."
And maybe, they’re not wrong.
Blade's worst nightmare has come true. Their friends have begun teasing them while they all gather around a bonfire, with the chilly wind adding to the atmosphere.
And Blade finds himself questioning his purpose. What drives him to immerse himself in the chaos of this world? There's no script dictating his actions, nor has Elio commanded him to do anything. Why does Blade's soul constantly pull him towards Dan Feng, a stranger he has never truly known?
Although he recognizes the resemblance between Dan Heng and Dan Feng, Blade understands that he cannot simply assume they are one and the same.
In the depths of Blade's contemplation, a profound sense of uncertainty engulfs him. The weight of his choices and the enigmatic connection he feels towards Dan Feng bear down upon his weary soul.
It is also as if the universe itself conspires to intertwine their fates, leaving Blade grappling with the inexplicable forces that bind them together.
As Blade gazes into the abyss of his own existence, he wishes for answers that elude him. The allure of Dan Feng's enigmatic presence tugs at his very core, beckoning him towards a destiny yet to be unveiled.
Yet, amidst the turmoil, Blade remains resolute. He refuses to succumb to the easy path of assumptions and conjecture. Instead, he wants to unravel the truth, to discern the intricate threads that weave their lives together.
"Please cease your quarrel, you two lovebirds," a woman named Jingliu, who was seated next to Baiheng, interjects, diverting Blade's attention. "The sight of you both not gazing at each other's eyes all the time is rather uncomfortable. It's causing us distress.”
"Allow them their space," Baiheng cautions her. "They're aware of their actions."
"What? I'm just saying they simply need to kiss and make up," Jingliu suggests, chuckling. "No one died. Everything's fine."
Jing Yuan joins in her laughter. "We're all aware that Dan Feng dislikes public displays of affection."
"Oh, he’ll change his tune once he consumes some alcohol," Jingliu remarks knowingly.
It turns out that Jingliu was right.
Apparently, Dan Feng has a tendency to excessively indulge in drinking at parties before midnight, or so Blade heard from others.
This apparently has become a familiar routine for those around Dan Feng. Whether he's burdened by stress or overwhelmed with happiness, this seems to be his coping mechanism.
Recognizing the need to intervene, Blade is called upon to escort Dan Feng back to his room.
Blade thinks he should just shadow Yingxing's past actions according to their friends, to not jeopardize Yingxing's relationship with Dan Feng.
With utmost care and consideration, Blade fulfills his lover's duty by gently cradling Dan Feng in his arms, employing a carry technique that ensures his safety.
As they make their way, Dan Feng repeatedly murmurs, "I'mnothim," expressing remorse for something.
Unfortunately, Blade is unable to comprehend what Dan Feng is mumbling repeatedly. And at that point, he's too tired to care.
Moreover, Blade finds himself in a familiar building, yet he realizes he is uncertain about the location of Dan Feng's room. Consequently, he just decides to take a leisurely detour and head towards Yingxing's room—where he’s currently staying.
"I don't even enjoy drinking," Dan Feng complains, his eyes still closed, as he tightens his grip around Blade's neck. He even starts murmuring random things on his neck, so Blade can't hear anything he's saying. "And these clothes are not to my liking. And you, you're cute, I'll give you that. But when your hair's down and you have all of the bandages wrapped around you, that's just... perfect."
Puzzled, Blade whispers, "What, Dan Feng? I can't hear you."
Dan Feng shakes his head vigorously, disagreeing. "No... No," he protests. "I don't want to be here."
Apologetically, Blade responds, "I apologize, but I'm unaware of where your room is."
Dan Feng grumbles something else under his breath, finally releasing his grip around Blade's neck. This allows Blade to carefully lay his body on the bed.
Blade is taken aback by the unexpected sensation of Dan Feng's lips lightly grazing his own. It feels incredibly gentle, akin to a soft breeze, but there's a hint of alcohol on his lips. Blade's cheeks flush with surprise as he struggles to catch one breath.
"S-Sorry," Dan Feng mutters. "You don't want—"
Blade doesn't even know what came over him. His mind becomes consumed with the desire for Dan Feng's lips on his again.
"No need to apologize. Do it again," Blade interrupts.
And Dan Feng does. Again. His lips crash down on Blade's in a hard, almost bruising manner. It's messy, the kiss of a drunk man.
Dan Feng curls his arms around Blade's neck, finally stealing all of his breath away. Suddenly, Blade feels his hairpin being pulled away from his hair. It appears that Dan Feng strongly dislikes it when Yingxing ties up his hair.
Blade traces his hands around Dan Feng's back, feeling a bit frustrated by the layers of clothing that separate him from Dan Feng's skin. So he settles on his hands sliding down to Dan Feng's waist as he pins him down on the bed.
Dan Feng lets out a shaky breath, releasing Blade for a moment. Blade goes for his neck, kissing every inch of it slowly. He moves downward until his lips return to Dan Feng's jaw.
Blade kisses his way up to Dan Feng's ear and whispers, "You're beautiful, Dan Feng."
Dan Feng suddenly freezes at that. There's a long, unbearable pause where Blade can't even breathe. Dan Feng slowly lowers his head, pulling away from Blade.
"I think you should go," Dan Feng tells him, lying down and pretending to sleep.
Moments pass before Blade feels like a splash of cold water has awakened him. He realizes what he has done. Another part of him wants to complain that it's his room, so why should he be the one to go?
When Blade becomes sure that Dan Feng has fallen asleep, he can't help but mutter, "And... I'm sorry that I'm not your dear Yingxing," before he begins to go out of the room for air.
But before Blade has the opportunity to take more than a few steps, a hand abruptly seizes his own.
Startled, Blade turns around to find Dan Feng, visibly laughing. At first, it's just air. Then it becomes a full-out belly laugh even while his eyes are closed.
"I know... You fool. I know you're Blade. Stupid, stupid Blade."
Blade isn't sure if he heard that correctly. It's as if his organs just did a somersault. Even though he hasn't taken a sip of alcohol earlier, he feels nauseous and has the urge to vomit.
Blade responds, "What's that, Dan Feng?"
Dan Feng forcefully strikes his chest with his hand. "I'm not Dan Feng! I’m not him!"
“Huh?” Blade's eyes widen in astonishment. "Wait. Is that you... Dan Heng?"
"You know what, this is all your fault in the first place—" Dan Feng, who is now apparently Dan Heng exclaims before suddenly wincing. He clutches his abdomen tightly as he struggles to contain something. Unfortunately, his efforts look like they're in vain.
Blade kneels to look at Dan Heng in concern. "Are you okay?"
And with a gut-wrenching heave, the contents of Dan Heng’s stomach forcefully expel themselves.