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Evan and Barty were sitting on a ledge in the courtyard, passing a cigarette between each other. They were on the other side of the yard, across from James and Regulus, who were sitting on the grass. They didn’t have any classes that day, and had been sitting there for quite some time, just smoking and watching Regulus try to study as James tried to get his attention.
“Hey Ev,” Barty nudged him. “Look.” He then pointed at James and Regulus, who were now kissing very openly. Though there weren’t many people around. Evan just laughed lightly, and shook his head, before passing the cigarette back to Barty.
Barty took the cigarette, but immediately screamed “Fags!” before putting it between his lips.
“Barty!” Evan scolded, hitting him in the shoulder, but he was still smiling.
James and Regulus didn’t even pull away when Barty did this, they just simultaneously put up their middle fingers, and aimed them in Barty’s direction.
Barty shot him a proud smile and Evan rolled his eyes. Evan was about to take the cigarette from Barty again, but he then noticed a very angry Mrs. McGonagall marching towards them.
“Uh-oh.”
“What?” Barty asked, looking around.
“McGonagall.”
“Mr. Crouch!” They heard her yell from behind. Barty immediately got off the ledge, and turned to face McGonagall. “Was that you shouting that filth?” She questioned in her same shrill voice. Barty let out a small laugh, and Evan kicked him.
“Yes ma’am.” Barty admitted and he had his head down, though it was only to hide the smile on his face.
“You do understand only certain people have permission to use that word?’ Mrs. McGonagall started again. “This is completely unacceptable.” She scolded.
Evan was the one trying to keep Barty in line, but not even he could. He began laughing hysterically. Barty shot him a look of ‘Shut up.’ He couldn’t look at Barty in times like these. He held his stomach and put up a hand as he got down on his knees. It was taking everything in Barty to take this seriously, though he was only trying because he didn’t want detention again.
“Do you mind explaining what is so funny, Mr. rosier?” Evan began laughing harder at the question. He was now laying on the ground. Barty was still trying to keep it together, but when he caught sight of Evan lying on the ground, he just couldn’t. He covered his mouth in an attempt to suppress his laughter.
“Mr. Crouch!” McGonagall yelled. “This is no laughing matter, and I assure you it will be taken seriously.” Barty held his breath before replying, and just barely managed the words, “I’m sorry.” Before breaking out into laughter once more.
“Detention.” She declared, sounding very unimpressed. “And to make sure this doesn’t happen again, 50 points will be taken from Slytherin.” Barty would swear Evan started rolling on the ground when she said this. But even if he wasn’t rolling, he was now practically wheezing. “Follow me, Mr. Crouch.” Her voice was calmer, but still stern. She waved her hand as a signal for Barty to follow. But he didn’t.
Barty walked over to Evan’s side and got down on his knees. He leaned over and grabbed Evan’s face, kissing him. Evan laughed softly against his lips, and placed a hand on the back of Barty’s neck. The kiss was short-lived, and Barty smiled at him sweetly before saying, “Don’t wait for me, beautiful.”
He got up off the ground and faced McGonagall once more, who had her mouth hung open. She looked like she was about to say something, but she just put her hands up, surrendering.
“Punishment rescinded.” She sighed. “But please, no more shouting curse words across the school.” She said, before walking away and shaking her head.
“Huh,” Barty shrugged. “Guess that worked.” He turned around and stretched out a hand to help Evan up off the ground.
He put his hands on Evan’s waist, and placed their foreheads together.
“You know if you kept laughing like that, you were going to get me in even more trouble.” Barty smiled, and Evan threw his head back in laughter, obviously very pleased with himself.
Barty shook his head and Evan just grabbed his face and kissed him, which James and Regulus must have seen, because they heard Regulus shout at them.
“Fags!”
“Yeah!” James agreed, though he would agree with pretty much anything Regulus said. Barty called James, Regulus’ lap dog. Never to his face, but loud enough so he could hear.
Barty scoffed at them, but if he was being honest, he found it funny. He looked at them, and then back at Evan, before going back in to kiss him harder. If they were going to use his own joke against him, he was going to live up to it. Though, he would look for any excuse to kiss Evan.
After that, the whole ordeal became an inside joke between them. If any of them spotted the other two kissing, they would shout it loud enough for everyone to hear. The only person who didn’t enjoy this joke was McGonagall.
But Barty especially appreciated this joke, and would partake in it no matter how many people were around, even if he received some less-than-kind looks. Marlene quickly got her and Dorcas in on the fun, and then Remus and Lupin, Mary and Lily. Though Lily wasn’t too happy about this joke, and openly expressed her disappointment whenever Mary would shout it at any of them, she thought it was mean.
“Barty, do you see what you’ve started?” Evan asked. They were laying in Barty’s bed in the Slytherin dorms. Their legs were intertwined, and Evan’s shirt was pulled up slightly, Barty’s hand resting on his bare waist.
“It’s funny, isn’t it?” Barty asked.
“Funny to an extent.” Evan rolled his eyes. “You’ve gotten us detention so many times because McGonagall has asked you repeatedly to stop.”
“Oh come on, you know it’s funny.” Barty smiled proudly.
“Sure.” Evan said sarcastically.
“It’s not like we weren’t getting detention before the joke started.” Barty started. “In case I recall, you got us detention for pushing first years down the stairs.”
“Okay but-”
“And for skating down the halls, and for sneaking out, spray-painting the walls.-”
“OK, you’ve made your point.” Evan laughed, and Barty just smiled at him. They stayed like that for a moment, just sitting in silence, staring at one another. They never really told each other that they loved the other. Of course they had said it, but it really went without saying, they knew they loved each other. But for some reason Barty felt like he needed to say it.
“Hey Ev?”
“Yeah Bee?”
“I love you.”
“I know you do.” Evan smiled at him, and Barty smiled back. “But I love you too.” Evan grabbed Barty’s cheek and stared at him for a moment before leaning in to kiss him softly.
“Good.” Barty said when they pulled away. But the moment only lasted until they heard someone running around in the common room, and then heard as they ran up the stairs. Whoever it was they were about to pass Barty’s dorm, and his door was open.
He heard Marlene and James laughing, as they ran by, but then they stopped and took a few steps back just to scream “Fags!” at them very loudly, before continuing to run. Barty and Evan then heard as they called for Regulus and Dorcas, and then they knew why they were both running.
“I hope you are happy.” Evan looked at him. “It’s worse now that they’re doing it.” He rolled his eyes.
“I am happy.” Barty pulled one of Evan’s hands to his lips and kissed it. “Very happy.”