Archive of Our Own

She didn't know if she liked Driftmark. The view was stunning and the castle was nice, but Aemma hadn't really been able to take any of the island's beauty in, too upset about their reason for being here. Lady Laena had been given back to the sea after her death in Pentos and Aemma had been terribly sad during the funeral, doing her best to hold back tears, something she failed at miserably now, in the privacy of her chambers. Laena had promised to come back, she had promised to fly beside her and to introduce her to her daughters so they would be friends. She had lied, the Stranger had made her a liar by taking her away.

If only they had been in King's Landing! Surely those pentoshi healers hadn't known what they were doing and killed her! No, no, Laena had killed herself, had told Vaghar to burn her in order to escape the agony of childbirth. A flash of memory assaulted the girl at that moment, the trail of blood that had led her to Rhaenyra's chambers, how drawn and exhausted she had looked and hers had been a birth that had gone well. Her own mother had labored for almost a full day with Aemma, she had heard the story many times, how the birth had been complicated and had almost cost the queen her life, how she had fought for weeks after, childbed fever having set in almost immediately.

And there was of course her namesake, Queen Aemma Targaryen who had been cut open to free the infant inside her and left to bleed to death, terrified and in pain.

Was this her fate? Her duty as a princess of the realm, as a woman, to fight a bloody battle in the birthing chamber and pray to every god that would listen that they would be kind enough to let her live? If so then she'd rather take up the blade and die in battle as a knight, there at least she would get to choose her own death and not be beholden to the whims of whatever lord she was married to, forced to push out his heirs until it killed her.

Aemma had played with the thought of being a warrior-princess before, though no one would ever train her in the art of the blade, her having asked Ser Christon if he would show her and been denied, even earning a scolding from her mother and the septa over her unladylike behavior when the knight brought her continued inquiries to the queen's attention.

She had been upset about this denial, though Lucerys had taken to showing her what he learned in the privacy of the Godswood, the two children playfighting with sticks, their laughter dancing through the trees. Until he left, that is, it had been almost six moons since the crown princess left court with her children, Aemma was sure her nephews had learned much and more about swordplay since then. She should go ask them, perhaps even strike up a conversation with Rhaena and Baela, their mother had wanted them to be friends and Daemon struck her as the type of man who would much rather see his daughters hold a sword in their hands then a needle, maybe they could show her some things, too.

Mind made up, the girl sat up in bed, wiping her tears from her face and getting hurriedly dressed in her riding leathers. She checked the hallway outside her chambers, relieved when she saw no guards, and snuck out, closing the door quietly behind her. Rhaenyra and her family had been placed on the other side of the castle, probably to keep tensions between her and the queen to a minimum, so Aemma would have to sneak through the entire keep to get to her nephews' chambers. Difficult, but not impossible, she only needed to be careful not to get lost in the unfamiliar castle.

The girl stuck to the shadows as she made her way to the main hall, hoping to find her way towards the chambers Jace and Luke had been assigned from there. She needn't have bothered, running into her nephews and cousins as soon as she entered the hall.

“Aemma! What are you doing here?”, Luke asked, scampering over with a smile.

The girl couldn't help but smile back, she had always enjoyed Luke's company, the two children having made quick friends, despite the tensions between their mothers.

“I was hoping to find you, actually. I wanted to ask if you could show me some of what you've learned in the yard, like you used to.”

The boy brightened and nodded eagerly, opening his mouth to answer when he was interrupted by his brother.

“This is all fine and good, but we have to move, or we'll be found.”

Aemma nodded and followed the other children outside, curious as to where they were going.

“Rhaena is going to claim Vaghar. We went with her to watch.”, Baela explained as they walked, eyeing her curiously.

Aemma smiled shyly at her, unsure how to act around this girl she had last seen as a babe.

“Make sure she is strapped in tight, Vaghar shakes like an earthquake when she takes off.”

Those words had all four children looking at her in varying degrees of awe and curiosity.

“You've flown with Vaghar before?”, Rhaena asked, sidling up to her, her sister shoving Luke out of the way to walk on Aemma's other side, something the boy grumbled about.

Aemma snorted at their antics, then softened her smile, remembering her first and last flight with her aunt.

“Yes, your lady mother took me for a flight when she came to King's Landing to present you to court. I was no more than five years old at the time, but I remember it so vividly... Lady Laena was a wonderful person, I wish I could have met her again...”

There was a contemplative expression on Rhaena's face, when her twin spoke up.

“She said she wanted us to be friends... I didn't know she had met you, though, I just thought she had said that because we are cousins.”

The young princess' gaze hit the ground, which had turned from hewn stone steps leading down to the beach, to pebbles, to sand.

“I would like us to be friends... if you wish to, as well?”

She was surprised when Rhaena took her hand in hers, giving her fingers a squeeze, Baela following her sister's lead and taking Aemma's other hand.

“Friends it is.”

The older girl looked between the twins and grinned, her heart swelling with joy even in her grief.

A low rumble took her attention away from the other girls and all five children came to a stop on the crest of a small hill, looking down at the dragon that took up almost the entire beach with her size.

“Whoah... she's huge!”, Jacaerys gasped behind them, peeking around the girls with wide eyes.

“Are you sure she isn't going to eat you, Rhaena?”, Luke asked, stepping closer to his brother, seeming unsure of their little adventure all of a sudden.

Said girl let go of Aemma's hand and straightened her spine.

“I am not afraid.”

Aemma held her breath as the younger girl strode down the hill and towards the massive dragon, Baela having a death-grip on her hand as she watched her twin approach the enormous beast. When Vaghar lifted her head, she expected her to bellow a greeting and lower her side so Rhaena could climb on, like she had done for Laena so many years ago, but that is not what happened. Instead the giant beast opened her maw, orange glowing at the back of her throat and Aemma was running before she even knew it, dragging Baela along since the younger girl had not let go of her hand even as she shrieked at the top of her lungs.

“Rhaena, run!”

Rhaena dove out of the way of the blast of flame that was blown at her, but she didn't escape it entirely, her skirt catching fire and the girl screaming in a panic. Aemma hauled the shorter girl over her shoulder and threw her into the shallows of the nearby ocean, Baela crying and hugging her sister as Rhaena sputtered and coughed.

“Rhaena! Rhaena, are you okay?!”, Luke cried out, the boys having followed them in their hasty sprint.

The younger girl nodded, looking for the first time like the tiny eight-year old she really was with her dress clinging to her and fat tears spilling down her face, her silver curls a wet mess. The twins were clinging tightly together and Aemma had to drag the both of them out of the water, lest they catch their death there, all three girls spilling onto the sand, as the boys fretted over them.

“My legs...”, Rhaena gasped, glancing down at the burnt mess of her calves, her skirt having almost completely burnt away, something that prompted Jace to throw his cloak around her to preserve her modesty.

“We should head back inside and let the maester take a look at that.”, Aemma said gently, trying to ease the sting of the clear rejection that Vaghar had dealt the younger girl.

“Wait!”, Luke said, holding up both hands to keep them from rising from the sands, “Maybe Aemma should try claiming Vaghar. She has ridden her before and if she doesn't want Rhaena as her rider then maybe she will accept Aemma.”

Said girl gaped, then rapidly shook her head.

“Do you want me to be incinerated? There is no way Vaghar would ever choose me as her rider. We should go.”, she made to help Rhaena up, but the younger girl shook her head, catching both her hands and taking them between hers.

“Try it.”

Aemma stared at her, her cousin looking at her beseechingly.

“Maybe she is meant to be yours. At least try it, Aemma.”

Baela snorted next to her sister, giving the older girl a mischievous grin.

“The worst she can do is burn you to a crisp. So, go and say hello to the giant dragon, princess.”

Aemma felt oddly bolstered by that and nodded, taking a deep breath before turning around to face the Old Queen, who had been watching them the entire time, her earlier attack having clearly been nothing more than a warning shot. She swallowed, hoping that the dragon would afford her the same courtesy and not just gobble her up in one bite.

“You can do it, Aemma.”, Jace said, his younger brother nodding enthusiastically beside him.

“Okay...”, she wasn't so sure, but it couldn't hurt to try... well, it could hurt a lot to try, but she was willing to pay that price.

Slowly, with a pounding heart and weak knees, she approached the dragon, who watched her through beady eyes. Aemma felt the awe settle in her bones, just as it had when she was five, as she came closer to the beast. Vaghar was truly magnificent.

Raising a shaky hand even as Vaghar opened her gigantic snout, she shouted, her words almost getting lost in the low growl the dragon was emitting.

“Dohaeris, Vaghar! Likirī!”

The glow at the back of the old dragon's throat brightened, but strangely enough Aemma wasn't afraid. There was an odd calm overtaking her heart, a warm touch at the back of her mind, something old and mighty brushing against her young, small soul.

“Be careful, Aemma!”, someone shouted, but she stepped forward further, the menacing light extinguishing and Vaghar closing her snout, letting out that familiar bellow of greeting and lowering her shoulder so she would be able to climb onto her back. Aemma touched the dragon's muzzle, like she had done eight years ago, her scales being just like she remembered, smooth and hot to the touch.

A shriek behind her startled her out of her reverie, Baela having jumped to her feet, her arms thrown into the air.

“You did it! Go take your first flight! You did it!”

The boys were running around like headless chickens, shouting over each other and calling encouragements, but her gaze was on Rhanea, who still sat on the ground, a mixture of disappointment and joy pulling her features into a strange grimace. She nodded to her, signifying her approval and Aemma took a hold of the ladder that swung from the dragon's back, climbing up into the saddle and securing herself in with the chains, nostalgia flooding her as she looked out over Vaghar's back, the view familiar and bringing back bittersweet memory of her aunt.

Aemma closed her eyes and took a deep breath, then spoke the same word Laena had back then.

“Sōvēs!”

Vaghar shook, Aemma's stomach lurching as the dragon took to the air, heaving her massive frame into the nightsky, the ocean glittering beneath them as the Old Queen soared above it, Driftmark stretching out to the right of her. For a moment she could almost convince herself that it was daytime and that it was Blackwater Bay beneath them, King's Landing stretching out to their right, instead. Tears beaded in her eyes, her companion the wind wiping them away as he caressed her skin, a gentle reunion between old friends. She could almost feel her aunt sitting behind her, like she had when she was five, her warmth flooding her veins and her arm secure around her middle. For a moment, she believed she could hear her voice amongst the crashing of the waves and the beat of Vaghar's wings.

“You've done well, sweet girl. At last, we fly together...”

The girl shook her head, chasing the phantom voice away. She was tired and sad and exhilarated, she was hearing things. Her aunt was dead, she could not be hearing her voice.

Vaghar landed back where the others where, Aemma almost lurching out of the saddle at the slightly clumsy set down. Flying with the old dragon would take some practice. Mentally apologizing to that ancient fire that now resided in the back of her mind, the girl undid the chains holding her in the saddle and climbed down, where she was almost bowled over by her... friends? Could she call them her friends? Her family they were, but that did not make them friends automatically, Rhaneyra and Alicent were a prime example of that, but perhaps Aemma would be able to count her cousins and nephews as her friends as well. Their enthusiastic shouting and hugging in celebration seemed to confirm this, at least.

“Aemma, Aemma you have a dragon! You have Vaghar!”, Luke squealed, dancing around them as she dragged the boys and Baela over to where poor Rhaena was still sitting in the sand, her legs too burnt for her to stand on her own. Aemma fell to her knees in front of her and the younger girl hugged her tightly.

“I'm sorry.”, she breathed, not knowing why she was apologizing, Vaghar's rejection not being her fault, but she still felt like she had to.

“It's okay... I will find my dragon one day.”, Rhaena pulled back and gave her a watery smile, “You've found yours in Vaghar, this is a happy moment.”

Aemma smiled shakily and got up, helping the shorter girl stand, Jace going to her other side to sling her arm around his shoulders, so the both of them could help her limp along. Their journey back to the castle was rather slow because of this, Rhaena having to stop every now and then to catch her breath, meaning it was quite late by the time they came back, way past their bedtime, something that Aegon noted when he came across them all in a hallway, the children having decided to go to Daemon first, since Rhaena was his daughter and he was the least likely adult to make a fuss about her injuries.

“What are all of you doing out of bed... and together?”, the teen asked suspiciously looking between the four younger kids and Aemma, who gently untangled herself from Rhaena and stepped forward. She was the eldest of their little group and she was Aegon's sister, it was her responsibility to make sure he didn't do anything stupid.

“Rhaena tried to claim Vaghar and was injured. Now let us through, brother.”

Aegon tilted his head at them, his sharp eyes raking over them and then boring into hers.

“You're lying. I heard you make a racket earlier, you were celebrating and I doubt it was the little brat getting burnt that had you in such high spirits, sister.”

Aemma pursed her lips, then threw her head back and squared her shoulders. She was a dragonrider now. She would convince her father to let her train in the yard and let her be a knight. If he could make a woman heir to the throne, then he could make a woman a knight, as well, and she rode Vaghar now, he had to teach her to fight, she would be far more useful as a warrior then a bargaining chip. But for her to be a knight she couldn't be a shrinking daisy. She was sick of cowering before Aegon anyway.

“I claimed Vaghar. I ride the largest dragon in the known world, now. No more pigs for me, brother.”

Ageon threw his head back and laughed. It stung more than it should, considering she knew the kind of arse her brother could be.

“You really want me to believe that a little cunt like you claimed Vaghar?”

Baring her teeth in a snarl, the fire at the back of her mind flaring with righteous anger, she stepped up to her brother until she was chest to chest with him.

“I may have a cunt, but my balls are still bigger than yours.”

She should have seen the blow coming, but the fist that smashed into her face still knocked the breath out of her, throwing her to the ground, where she choked in shock. Aegon had been mean to her, cruel even, but he had never hit her before.

“Aemma!”, came a shout from behind her and she scrambled to her feet just in time to see Baela rush the teen and yank on his hair as Luke barreled into his front, slamming balled fists into his chest and belly, some of which even seemed to hurt, judging by the snarl with which Aegon flung the younger boy away, kicking Baela into the stomach and making her crumple to the floor and gag, trying to keep her dinner down.

Aemma saw red and threw herself at her brother, slapping him in the face while kicking at his knee, something that made him crash to the ground when Jace joined in, throwing himself onto the gangly teen's back and looping an arm around his neck, trying to choke him. A rock soared over Aemma's shoulder, Rhaena, who sat on the ground a bit away, having thrown it, hitting Aegon in the head with it, causing blood to spill down his temple and mat his hair. Aemma kicked at him as he struggled to get Jacaerys off him, but her brother threw the shorter boy over his shoulder and smashed him in the face, coming up to snag Aemma and fling her away like a ragdoll, the girl gasping as she hit the ground again, rolling to a stop and struggling back to her feet as she heard Lucerys cry out, the boy clutching his bleeding nose as he stumbled away, Baela having been caught by the hair by Aegon, causing Jace to draw a knife on him.

“Let her go!”, he shouted and Aegon smirked nastily at the boy.

“Or what? You're going to cut me? I'd like to see you try!”

With that he kicked Baela at the boy, causing him to drop the knife in order to catch her. Aemma locked gazes with her brother, knowing immediately that he was going to go for the dagger. She could not allow Aegon to have a blade! The siblings dove for the knife at the same time, Aemma barely touching the handle, before her brother was on her, trying to snag it. They rolled around the floor, each trying to get a hold of the blade, Aegon swearing up a storm, when she managed to get it. He didn't let Aemma up, though, straddling her thighs and trying to pry the dagger from her grip. Aemma kicked and screamed, not letting go for the life of her, yanking backwards when Jace came back, tearing at the older boy's back and trying to heave him off of her. She managed to scoot out from under her brother, who elbowed their eldest nephew in the face and lunged for her, snatching the wrist of the hand that held the dagger as the both of them stumbled backwards, trying to remain standing while hitting and scratching at each other.

Her brother twisted her hand forcing her to drop the blade, lest he break her wrist, and the teen caught the dagger as it was falling. In a panic, the girl grabbed a handful of Aegon's hair and tore his head backwards, causing him to slash out in an uncoordinated fashion, the blade a streak of silver as it flailed through the air, finding it's unintended mark.

Aemma's world exploded into red, white-hot pain lancing into her skull as an earth-shattering scream tore from her throat. The girl crashed to her knees, clutching her left eye, trying in vain to quell the flow of warm blood that kept bubbling between her fingers. She was choking on her own sobs, almost animalistic sounds of pain leaving her as she tried to cope with the agony that she was currently experiencing. It was unlike anything she had ever dealt with and the vision of her uninjured eye kept swimming in and out of focus, black dots crowding in, threatening to blot out her sight completely.

Familiar calloused hands were holding her arms, cupping her face, fluttering around uselessly, the knife they had previously held long gone, thrown away in a panic.

“Aemma! Aemma, your eye! Your eye! Oh gods, Aemma!”, her brother babbled uselessly, just as the guards finally noticed what was going on. She didn't know what exactly happened after, fainting into her brother's arms, the darkness finally stealing her away into sweet oblivion.

Aemma woke to shouting. A lot of shouting. It was terribly loud, her pounding head not liking the noise at all. The girl blinked blearily, not understanding why she could only open one eye until memory came back to her. Aegon had cut her. He had attacked her and her friends and he had cut her!

She snapped her head around, taking in the chaos that was happening around her, her mother furiously shouting at Rhaenyra about retribution while Viserys tried to keep the peace and , of course, failing miserably at it. Daemon was a dark shadow behind his daughter, eyes flickering to the happenings of the room, only to go back to watching the maester treat Rhaena's injuries, squeezing the girl's shoulder in comfort every time she flinched. Baela was standing next to her sister, only adding to the shouting, as where Lucerys, Jacaerys and Aegon.

“What in the seven hells is going on?”, she choked, confused and in pain and just wishing for everybody to shut up.

“He said it was Luke that cut you.”

Aemma startled badly at Helaena's sudden appearance, her sister sitting next to her and looking at her with worried eyes.

“But we both know it was Aegon who did it.”

She stared in confusion until comprehension dawned. Sunfyre. The sun will blind me. She meant Aegon.

The princess was torn from her muddled thoughts when the shrieking reached a fever pitch, Aemma staring in abject horror as her mother pulled a knife on Rhaenyra, the two women struggling for control of the blade not unlike her and Aegon had done earlier. Not wanting a repeat of what had happened there, Aemma stumbled to her feet, the room lurching sideways dangerously, but she didn't stop, tumbling in between the two women and shoving them apart, facing her mother and barely recognizing the distraught woman in front of her as such.

“Aemma-!”

“It was Aegon! Aegon cut me, not Luke!”

Alicent dropped the blade in horror, whirling around to her eldest, who stammered an excuse, but never got to finish it as the queen slapped him hard across the face.

“Your sister! How could you?!”

“It was an accident!”

It was there Daemon decided to pipe up, his voice silky smooth and full of derision.

“And yet you felt the need to lie about it, accusing your nephews of attacking you and your sister, sewing more discord than already exists... I wonder why?”

Aemma sagged as her brother looked away in shame, her strength leaving her as quickly as it had come. She stumbled to the side, swaying, and was caught by Baela, the girl having lurched forward as soon as she had seen her falter.

“Are you alright?”, she asked softly, leading her over to sit next to Rhanea.

“I'm okay... How are you, Rhanea?”

Said girl had tears gathering in her eyes as she reached for her hand, lacing their fingers together tightly.

“These burns are nothing compared to you. I'm so sorry, Aemma.”

She hummed, laying her aching head on her friend's shoulder.

“Not your fault.”

She watched as Viserys stepped forward, eyes lingering for a moment on her, where she was squeezed in between the twins, before sweeping over the room at large.

“This conflict between you must end. I will not have children harmed for the sake of their mother's squabbles.”

“My king-”, Rhaenyra began but was interrupted by their father.

“Do not try to justify this, daughter, this is the end result of what we all have wrought with our mistakes, myself included. We must not poison the next generation with our petty grievances, our jealousies and inherent biases. We shall be one family, allies. When they are of age, Aemma will be wed to Lucerys, may that be the end of this damnable infighting.”

That made her snap out of the light doze she had fallen into, her remaining eye widening and looking around frantically, meeting Luke's surprised gaze. The boy blinked at her, then flushed bright red as he realized that they were betrothed now.

While his reaction was funny, it did nothing to quell the cold dread that had taken root in her heart. She had thought- With Vaghar as her dragon, surely she would be allowed to remain a spinster? But, it seemed she wouldn't be safe from the childbed, after all. Not even Vaghar's ancient flames could protect her from her duty as a highborn lady, it seemed. She buried her face back in Rhaena's neck, ignoring the protest that her mother flung out. There would be no saving her from her fate.

…

“Aemma.”, she blinked sleepily, Rhaena and Baela lifting their heads as well, where all three girls had apparently fallen asleep. Looking around the room, she could tell that the last arguments had dispersed, the angry mood from earlier having dissipated into general exhaustion, as well as some amusement at the three girls who had ended up in a complicated tangle of limbs.

Her mother did not look amused as she looked down at them, just sad and forlorn and a little lost.

“Come, sweetling, it is time for bed.”, Alicent held out her hand for her and Aemma took it, surprised when her mother pulled her into a brief hug, smoothing her messy hair back from her face and kissing the crown of her head like she hadn't done since she was little. Before Aemma could properly melt into the hug, soaking up the little bits of affection that her mother allowed herself to give them under the heavy scrutiny of court, it was over already and the girl was held at arms-length, worried brown eyes roving over her face, Alicent's face pulling briefly into a grimace as her eyes hung on the scar, before smoothing out into neutrality. That brief second of disgust was all it took to shatter the last bits of Aemma's self-esteem into pieces. She had never thought of herself as especially pretty, but now she had a big ugly scar on her face. She must look horrendous. If anything, then she was lucky she had been betrothed tonight, for no one would want a bride as ugly as she was now.

In pain, both physically and emotionally, Aemma stepped out of her mother's hold and strode past her eldest sister and her sons, intending to make it towards the exit of the chamber, where Viserys was already waiting with Helaena, but a soft hand on her shoulder stopped her. Aemma blinked up at Rhaenyra in confusion, flinching slightly when the woman cupped her cheek, a gentle thumb tracing the stitches that held her wound together, regret flowing from her violet eyes.

“You can still come by and help me with Joffrey, if you want. I have not forgotten.”

For some reason that brought her almost to tears and Aemma nodded, swallowing the lump that had formed in her throat.

“Thank you... mandia.”

Rhaenyra's lips curled into a soft smile and she let her go.

“Sȳz bantis, Aemma.”

…