Work Text:
but it feels good
to be known so well
i can’t hide from you
like i hide from myself
Lyney was not a very violent person, but right now, he felt like he could be. These days, the people of Fontaine still give him a wide berth whenever he walks in the streets. They will attend his shows, watch him perform, but they wouldn’t dare directly speak to him, lest they unintentionally provoke him and are killed by his Fatui fighting skills. No, Lyney steers clear of violence, unless the person truly deserves it. The man who tried to take his sister from him, he deserved the end the Knave gave him, bloody, sacrilegious in its gore. Lorenzo deserved the way the Traveler roughed him up before sending him off to jail, after he had stolen the life and legacy of a good, honest man. Father would tell him that blood is a necessary evil, as is war. But Lyney disagrees. He believes that words are far sharper than any blade could be. War, in all its forms, should not be a required part of saving the world. Maybe the world would not agree with him, but Lyney didn’t particularly care. So, he stayed away from violence, focusing on his manipulative skills rather than his skills with a weapon. Still, at this moment, Lyney wished that public acts of violence were not frowned upon by Fontaine’s laws.
“Ah, my warrior! How I have missed you!”
Maybe if he framed it as a duel, he could get away with killing this guy? No, Aether would be upset with him. Apparently the man in front of him, the one currently wrapping his arms around Aether’s waist, a place reserved for Lyney’s arms, is one of Aether’s oldest friends. Mondstadt’s very own Venti the Bard. When Aether had told him that a friend of his was visiting Fontaine, he was quite excited about the idea of getting to see more of Aether’s life, more of the people he had met along his journey. However, now, he wished that he had never looked so damn happy about the idea. He wished that he had convinced Aether to not meet up with this friend of his, despite how upset he might have been with him for it. No, actually, Lyney could not handle Aether being angry with him, not again. Still, he really hated this Venti guy right now.
“Yes, Venti, I know. You missed me, now get off,” Aether says, laughing brightly as he weakly attempts to push the bard off of him. Another coil of bitterness wraps around Lyney’s gut. It took ages for Aether to smile like that around him, and here he was now, doing it so easily in the middle of the Court. He was talking,. Anyone who knew the Traveler knew that he didn't talk much, and only did it around those he was comfortable with. Something about Venti being one of those people rubbed Lyney the wrong way. The more sensible part of Lyney is yelling at the magician, telling him how repulsive it is to be angry that Aether is happy. He is fully aware of that. Lyney loves seeing Aether smile, but the fact that it’s someone other than Lyney making him smile is clouding the man’s vision, making him see red. Aether’s eyes pull away from Venti, catching on Lyney’s frame instead. Lyney’s poker face must have slipped, because whatever Aether sees makes his smile falter for a moment. Way to go, Lyney, he thinks to himself. He attempts to pull himself back together, but the damage is done. Aether worriedly drags the bard over to the magician, before pulling away and standing in between the two of them. “Venti, this is Lyney, the best magician in Fontaine. Lyney, this is Venti, the best bard in Mondstadt.”
What kind of name even is Venti? Lyney thinks.
“Nice to meet you, my friend. Welcome to Fontaine,” he says instead. “Is this your first time in the City of Justice?”
“Feels like it! I haven’t been here in centuries, I think,” the bard replies, his braids flowing lightly in the easy breeze. Lyney laughs awkwardly at what he assumes is Venti’s attempt at humor, but stops when no one else does. Aether coughs into his fist, giving Venti a harsh side-eye. All he does is give the Traveler a smug grin in response, and Lyney can’t help but feel like he’s missing out on some inside joke.
Lyney has felt self-conscious before, like he didn’t fit in. It was a common occurrence back when he lived with that wretched noble, who would take him to parties to parade Lyney around like some circus animal. Lyney would be wearing all the right clothes, dressed to the nines in Fontanian garb, but everyone could take one look at him and know he didn’t belong. He was a pet, not an equal to any of the people at those parties. He had to fight to be acknowledged, to get a seat at the table with powerful people. Even now, he is not among their ranks, not truly. Sometimes, Lyney feels like he was passed from one owner to the next, with Father only making him feel like he belonged when she wanted something from him. Still, Lyney is nothing if not loyal, so if Arlecchino said jump, he would always ask how high.
Now, Lyney worries that the small taste of freedom he got whenever he was with Aether was going to be stripped away from him by some random bard. Assumedly, Aether had met Venti almost three years ago, when the Traveler made his debut as the Honorary Knight in Teyvat. These two had history. They knew each other well. If Lyney really thought about it, perhaps Aether and him had moved a little fast with their relationship, seeing as they only met almost two months ago. But Lyney had been clinging on to that last shred of romanticism in his heart, the one that told him Aether and him were meant to be together. The two of them were written in the stars, he thought. He isn’t sure of it now, thinking that maybe he simply latched on to the bare amount of kindness Aether showed him when they first met. Everything they had was nothing in comparison to what Venti and Aether shared.
Hm, perhaps Lynette wasn’t wrong about his tendency to catastrophize.
“Well, are you going to show me around, or what?” A high-pitched, lyrical voice brings Lyney’s attention back to the current moment. He sucks in a breath. Aether and him had planned to spend the day together, with the adventurer not taking any commissions and Lyney canceling rehearsals with Lynette. Still, Lyney knows it would be rude to not take the foreigner on a tour of the city, and Aether is much too polite to ever deny one of his closest friends. That does not mean that Lyney can handle being around the two of them for much longer. Aether winces, casting Lyney an apologetic glance. Lyney was an actor at heart, so he swallowed his grief and smiled, pretending that he didn’t feel like he was dying.
“I’ll see you another time, then, Aether,” Lyney said, his smile so strained he felt as if it might tear his skin.
“Lyney, wait–” Aether started, but Lyney was already gone. Still, out of the corner of his eye he caught Venti giving him a curious look. In only a second, a quiet look of realization passed over the bard's face, before he gave Lyney a mischievous grin. It was the face of a schemer, someone who had realized Lyney’s weakness and now planned to use it against him. Lyney felt sick, as he practically ran away from Café Lucerne and tripped up the stairs back to the hotel. The cafe was still visible from his window, so he watched as Venti dragged a nervous-looking Aether down the street, toward the waterways.
“What happened?” A monotone voice spoke from behind Lyney, spooking him as he pulled the curtains closed. Lynette stood in the center of the room, out of her usual costume and dressed in normal, relaxed clothing. Lyney’s sister looked particularly suspicious, knowing that the magician would never pass up on a chance to spend more time with a certain Traveler.
“Ah, Lynette! Nothing, just some scheduling conflicts,” Lyney replied, hastily taking off his gloves and top hat. As Lyney attempted to escape up the stairs to his room, a firm hand grabbed onto his arm. He would always be taken aback by how strong his feeble-looking sister really was. She packed muscle underneath all the frills and bows. Lynette fixed him with a stern look, dragging him into one of the chairs and shoving a half-drunken tea into his hands. “Wait, isn’t this yours?”
“Hush. Tell me what happened,” she said, curling up into the chair opposite him like the cat she was. Lyney hesitated. All of his worries made him sound a bit like an idiot, when he really thought about it. Aether was allowed to have friends, especially friends who expressed their love for him. The Traveler deserved to be loved, but something about the way Venti did it unnerved Lyney. Aether had told him, once, that he was a much different person when he first came to Mondstadt, more carefree and affectionate. An Aether who must have been easy to fall in love with, with his angelic looks and sweet smile. There was a reason Lyney called Aether mon ange, the man truly seemed like an angel sent from Celestia sometimes. Lynette held out a hand to her older brother. Physical touch never failed to relax the magician. He took her hand, breathing out before beginning to speak.
“Do you remember when I told you one of Aether’s old friends was visiting?” Lynette nodded. Lyney went on hour-long rants from time to time, telling her about what had been happening lately, in both Fontaine and in his personal life. She never failed to remember everything her brother had told her, sometimes passing the information along to Freminet, when relevant. “Well, he came a day early and crashed our date. The thing is, well, they’re friendly. Really friendly, with each other. Especially the bard. Venti, his name is.
“I know it’s stupid of me, but I’m just nervous. They seem quite close, and Venti has known Aether much longer than I have… Aether’s too good for me, and I’m scared that he’s going to look at Venti and realize he could do much better than me.”
Lynette gave her brother a long, cold look, as her mind worked to formulate a response. Finally, she spoke, “Hm, you’re right. You are being stupid.”
Lyney curled into himself, hunching his shoulders to make himself small. He had hoped, foolishly, that Lynette would have worded it a bit nicer. Still, his sister was nothing but blunt and straight to the point. He was taken out of his thoughts by Lynette squeezing his hand firmly, taking the tea out of his grasp while staring deep into his eyes.
“But not for the reasons you think you are. How do you think Aether would feel if he heard what you were saying right now? He would throw up, I think. The two of you both think that the other deserves someone better, but you’re wrong. You deserve each other. Aether is obsessed with you. It is obvious to anyone who has eyes,” Lynette sighed, her eyes floating over to the side. Whatever decision she made at that moment, she quickly came to a conclusion. “Do you remember when you asked me how I knew Aether would forgive you, and I said ‘because I just know?’ I lied. I knew because of the way Aether looks at you. The way he has always looked at you. Whenever he looks at you, it’s as if he would rather die than look anywhere else. It’s a little disgusting, how crazy he is about you. Maybe this Venti guy likes Aether, but that will never matter to him. He will never matter to Aether the way you do.”
The feline girl shuddered out a large breath, clearly overwhelmed from talking so much. Lyney, meanwhile, was barely holding back tears. His grip on his sister’s hand had become almost deadly, as if she was the only thing keeping him from falling into the Abyss. He hated showing weakness around his siblings, used to being the strong one in the family. But if Aether had taught him anything, it was that vulnerability was not always a bad thing. Lyney opened his arms, saying, “Please come here.”
Lynette wrapped around her brother like a blanket, taking him into a hug. They sat there for what must have been a few hours, as Lyney slowly recollected himself and his thoughts. Their warm silence was stopped by a soft voice, “Um, can I interrupt?”
“Of course, my dear Freminet, what troubles you?” Lyney said, wiping the unshed tears from his eyes. Freminet presented a letter, wrapped in a small golden twine. He could only think of one person that would have sent such a thing, especially with the subtle scent of Cecelias and morning rain emanating from the paper. Lyney opened it, pretending he didn’t see both of his siblings peering over his shoulders to read the letter along with him.
Lyney,
I want to apologize for cutting our date short. You can pretend
that you weren’t upset about it, but I know you. To make up for it,
I want to invite you to a do-over date at the Opera Epiclese tomorrow.
Lady Furina has invited Venti to perform, and I want to see it with you.
Venti has promised us free front row seats for interrupting us earlier.
Sincerely,
Aether
“Lady Furina invited him?” Lyney nearly shrieked, grasping the paper tightly in his hands. He would have torn it in half if he did not treasure everything Aether gave him. Even then, he could not help but notice the simpleness of Aether’s writing. Once again, that dark, self-deprecating part of his brain was whispering to him, telling him that if Aether truly cared for him he would at least say love instead of sincerely. However, Lyney had more important things to worry about at the moment.
“Well that’s odd,” Lynette added unhelpfully. To be fair, she was truly at a loss for what to say. Focalors herself inviting someone to perform at the Opera Epiclese was unprecedented. Whoever Venti was, he had to be a good bard. Or he had some sort of blackmail against Lady Furina, which was highly unlikely.
“Oh, so he’s actually talented, too,” Lyney groaned, as he shoved his face into his hands.
“Well, we don’t know that.”
“Ehh…” Freminet murmured, his gaze shifting away from his older siblings.
“Freminet? What do you know?” The magician jumped up out of his seat, as Lynette flailed in the air before gracefully falling onto the floor. Lyney, however, did not spare her a second glance, grasping his little brother by the shoulders and barely resisting the urge to shake the answers out of him.
“I mean, I’ve just heard rumors that, well, he’s quite good. Venti the Bard, he’s famous for his songs about… um, I don’t know what they’re about.” The sidelong glance Freminet gave Lynette told the girl that he very much did know what those songs were about, but that he would rather not say in front of Lyney. Thankfully, Lyney was too caught up in his own thoughts to notice anything amiss.
“How about this, why don’t you go to bed for now, shut off your brain for a few hours, go to the performance tomorrow and show Venti that Aether is yours?” Lynette offered, placing a gentle hand on her older brother's shoulder after getting up off the floor. Lyney heaved out a sigh in an attempt to forcibly relax himself, which did nothing at all to help soothe his nerves. Still, he looked at his siblings, who, despite how they would deny it, looked sick with worry. They hardly ever see Lyney this distressed, as he usually preferred to hide it from them. The fact that he let them see him this nervous was a testament to how important Aether was, and how important it was that Aether stayed in his life.
Slowly, Lyney shuffled up the stairs and into his bedroom. Even though Lyney lived the rest of his life quite ostentatiously, his bedroom was homely and small. In the nobleman’s house, the man had liked to keep up the facade that the twins were not just trophies to be showcased, so he had given them both large bedrooms of their own. Most nights, though, they would sneak into the other’s room after dark. Since then, Lyney has preferred smaller spaces, which is why he chose one of the smallest bedrooms as his own. He liked the coziness, with string lights adorning the ceilings and pictures of him and Lynette over the years across the walls. His most prized possession was a Grim-Malkin cat plush that Freminet had made for him, an item that Lyney secretly slept with every night. He curled up into his bed, which was covered with pillows and blankets of all shapes and sizes, trying not to think about the day's events.
It didn’t work, of course.
—————
Lyney would deny it later, but he was dressing to impress tonight. The magician shed his usual top hat and traded it out for two braids tied in the back of his head, threaded with the golden twine from Aether’s letter. His form was perfectly fitted by a sleek, black suit with red accents. Finally, he finished his ensemble with heeled boots, which accentuated his height over Aether. Perhaps he was being a little foolish, but he wanted all the attention tonight, even though he was not the one performing.
Outside of Hotel Deboard, glimmering like an angel, was Aether. Once, during their many conversations over the past few weeks, Aether had mentioned how uncomfortable he was wearing clothes other than his usual outfit. Something about it felt like a betrayal to who he was, to his sister. However, over time, Aether confessed he had begun to feel differently. The Traveler had planted roots in Teyvat, roots that would, one day, be as endless and encompassing as the roots of Irminsul. Changing his clothes felt like a commitment, Aether said. Still, Lyney had reassured Aether, even though part of him desperately wanted him to be committed to this world. It was this fact, Aether’s aversion to a costume change, that made Lyney’s jaw drop when he saw the Outlander. Well, that, and also because Aether was gorgeous.
Aether’s hair was pulled up into a high ponytail, wavy golden hair spilling from the top of his head and curling around his waist. He must have gotten help from a local tailor, as Aether’s clothes were incredibly Fontanian, yet perfectly suited Aether’s color scheme. Aether wore a white, frilled suit with the buttons undone, showcasing the puffy pirate shirt underneath. Of course, each corner of the outfit was accented with the Traveler’s signature gold. Lyney’s favorite part, however, was the cape that hung off one of Aether’s shoulders, which flared out in an imitation of wings at the bottom. Mon ange, mon soleil, mon cher, Lyney thought, I am stupidly in love with this man.
Wait, what the fuck?
The way Aether lit up when he caught sight of Lyney’s approaching form should have been illegal. All of the magician’s thoughts, worrying thoughts, were immediately cast aside in favor of taking one of Aether’s hands, bowing, and placing a gentle kiss on it. The Traveler smiled, in a way that, Lyney had recently learned, he hardly did for anyone else. In a way that stole the breath from his chest. At that moment, Lyney was reminded of the dilemma of the doves he used to keep. In the past, he would let the doves fly freely, allowed to roam Fontaine as they wished as long as they returned to him. However, some didn’t. Some didn’t make it back, caught by hunters before they could. Lyney had wondered, since then, how can you give someone freedom and safety? Looking at Aether now, he was struck by the same thought. How could he keep Aether safe, while still letting him travel the land in search of answers? How could he hold him close, without his grip being too tight? How could Aether still manage to trust Lyney, despite everything?
“Are you ready to go?” Aether asked, the setting sun a halo behind him.
“I’d go anywhere with you, Aether,” he replied.
Aether and Lyney arrived at the Opera Epiclese at the perfect time. Most people had begun to take their seats, but their attention was not yet on the stage. So, they had a perfect view of the perfect pair walking down the aisle to the front row. Aether, in white, and Lyney, in black. Murmuring began to fill the auditorium, and Lyney gave a little victorious grin to himself. While the conversation tomorrow would likely be about Venti’s performance, there would also be talk of the gorgeous it-couple who made a stunning debut together. Slowly, the lights in the house dimmed, as Venti appeared on stage in a burst of Anemo power.
“Hello, my friends! Thank you for coming to my show, and thank you for your warm welcome to Fontaine! Tonight, I will be regaling you with the tales of the Almighty Traveler from afar. Of course, all of the music was composed by yours truly, however, the stories belong to the golden-haired Outlander himself,” Venti announced dramatically. Aether could not help but smile to himself. He had heard Venti’s songs about him before, and he always found the bard’s slightly spiteful remarks about the many Archons Aether had met amusing. However, when he spared a glance to his partner beside him, Lyney did not look too happy about the fact that Venti was singing about him, even though his most popular songs were all about Aether. Still, he pushed down his concern, unconsciously straightening his back and dropping his warm smile. If Venti was singing about the Traveler tonight, then the Traveler should be in attendance, not Aether.
Venti’s music was beautiful, of course. His singing spanned the Traveler’s entire life in Teyvat, from saving Dvalin in Mondstadt to overthrowing the corrupt sages in Sumeru. Aether could not help but feel entirely disconnected from the treacherous epics of his life, as if someone else, someone braver and kinder, had lived through it all. At the end of the day, however, Aether had the scars to prove that he was the one who defeated the Raiden Shogun in combat, not anyone else. Despite Aether’s discomfort, and his worry for Lyney, he always enjoyed Venti’s songs. So he sat, listening for hours until the bard was done. The auditorium exploded in thunderous applause, as people burst out of their seats in a standing ovation.
“Ah, you flatter me! Really, you have all been a wonderful audience. I am sure that we will meet again!” Venti declared, before strutting off stage with the lightness of the wind in his movements. Finally, Aether turned to look at Lyney beside him, but when he did, part of him wished he hadn’t. Lyney’s expression was nothing short of thunderous, looking enraged at some unseen threat. Aether grabbed his partner's hand and pulled them through the sea of people exiting the theater, not caring when they looked at him oddly for his erratic behavior. He took him to a quiet corner off the side of the Opera, finally looking back at the magician once they reached their destination.
“Okay, what is up with you? You’ve been in a bad mood ever since we got here. Is something wrong?” Aether asked. Well, demanded, really. He probably could have phrased his question a bit better, but he was already slightly upset after having to sit through the rose-colored glasses version of his life story. Immediately, something defensive welled up inside of Lyney. He did not want to explain his childish jealousy to Aether. He did not want to divulge the secrets of his insecurities, that Aether would find someone else and realize he could do better than Lyney. He did not want to lose Aether, but he was still so terrified of Aether getting too close to him.
“Nothing is wrong, Aether. You’re being delusional,” Lyney spat out, his eyes turning away from Aether’s own. The magician could not bear to see Aether’s reaction to his words, seeing as he could hardly believe what was coming out of his mouth himself.
“Delusional? I am here, trying to have a nice night with you, and you say I’m being delusional about the fact that you are clearly upset about something.”
“I have nothing to be upset about!” Lyney exclaimed, looking back at Aether. He was clearly frustrated, his golden hair falling loose from his ponytail, strands curling around his perfect, enraged face.
“Exactly! Which is why I don’t understand what the fucking problem is. Why can’t you just tell me? Why don’t you trust me?” Aether never swore, which should have been an indicator to Lyney that he should stop now. That something terrible was about to happen, something he might not be able to fix.
“Oh, that’s rich coming from you, Aether. You don’t trust me, even now. You don’t even know who I am,” Lyney snapped, worries still plaguing his mind.
“Do you know who you are?” The Traveler yelled back, his voice steadily rising in volume before he was basically shouting at the magician. Lyney sucked in a breath, his anger faltering for a single second. It was just as he feared. Aether knew him too well. He knew Lyney well enough to know that the magician had no real sense of who he was underneath the facade of the Great Magician Lyney. Still, Lyney did not know Aether well enough to see that he shared the sentiment about the Traveler. Maybe if he did, he wouldn’t have said anything.
“Look, Traveler. This is not something that you can fix, alright? I know you want to try and fix everything, since you’re hell-bent on being everyone’s hero, but you can spare me from your savior complex,” stop stop stop stop, Lyney thought to himself, please stop. But there was no stopping, not now. “You couldn’t even save your own sister.”
In under a second, the walls that Aether built for himself, the ones that Lyney had tried so carefully to lower, were back up. A cold and apathetic expression overtook the Traveler’s face, as the man pulled away from Lyney with a tight jaw. He was silent. Silent as he was for everyone else. Once, Lyney had felt honored to be one of the chosen few that Aether talked a lot around, but now that privilege had been taken from him. Lyney had never felt so disgusted with himself. It was a quiet, rainy night when Aether told him about what had happened to his sister. How the Unknown God, the Heavenly Principles, stole her away from him. How he was unable to protect her as he had sworn to do. How he blamed himself for it, even now. Lyney had held Aether close that night, cradling him in his arms and telling him, “You would be a fool to think any of it was your fault. If your sister has any sense, which I know she does, she will never blame you for it.”
Lyney had taken that knowledge, which Aether told him in confidence, and thrown it back in his face, used it as a weapon to hurt him. Moments like these reminded Lyney why he was Arlecchino’s successor. No one with a good heart could ever be capable of cruelty like this.
“I see. Well then, goodbye Lyney,” Aether said, turning away and walking into the night. The second the man was fully out of sight, Lyney began to heave out sobs. He curled into himself, dropping down to the floor and wrapping his arms around his knees. The magician stayed there for what felt like hours, his tears never-ending their attack. Until a chime-like voice interrupted him.
“Why, hello there friend! Might I ask what troubles you?” Venti. The bard was one of the last people Lyney wanted to see right now. Still, some part of him thought that it might do him some good to confess to Venti how jealous he had been feeling because of him. He told the bard as such, saying that his affectionate behavior with Aether had made him unbearably bitter, until he lashed out against Aether and said something truly unforgivable. Venti’s only response was to laugh uncontrollably, of course.
“Me? And the Traveler? No, no, never in a million years! Aether is more like a brother to me, if anything. You have nothing to be worried about, I assure you. In fact, you should have seen him while he was giving me that tour. Every second he would go on about how Lyney once performed here, or how Lyney and I once got dinner here. Honestly, if it wasn’t so endearing, I might have puked!” Venti’s statements, although sweet and soothing, did nothing to calm the guilt building in his chest. The bard noticed Lyney’s inner turmoil, coming to crouch beside him. “But you said something terrible, huh? Well, if there’s one thing I know about Aether, it’s that he is too forgiving for his own good, especially when it comes to the people he loves.
“Go after him. He’s waiting for you. In fact, I think he’ll always wait for you,” Venti said, springing back up onto his feet and prancing away without saying anything more. Lyney shot up after him.
“Hey, wait! How did you get Lady Furina to ask you to perform?” He shouted.
“Well, let’s just say that the Hydro Archon and I go way back,” the bard replied with a wink, before turning and vanishing in a puff of Anemo. Lyney was suddenly struck by the feeling that Venti was much more powerful than he let others believe. Perhaps even incredibly powerful, he thought, suddenly picturing his sister’s Anemo Vision.
Still, with a renewed sense of confidence, Lyney ran into the night in search of his angel, his Aether.
—————
“Aether?”
Aether was standing in the cemetery, the cool midnight air blowing through his loose hair. If Lyney had more time, he could have waxed poetic about the way Aether’s golden hair sparkled in the night for hours. However, he had done irreversible damage to their relationship and was now daring to face Aether again after what he had done. Aether had gone to the cemetery after their argument, the usual haunt, as Lyney said. Some desperate part of Lyney’s brain screamed that it was a sign Aether wanted to fix them, but the rational part of him shunned those thoughts for the time being. The Traveler did not look back at Lyney, merely staring off into the lakes of Fontaine. He would need to work to regain Aether’s trust, it seemed, but Lyney would be happy to do that for the rest of time, as long as he could stay by his side.
“Aether, please look at me,” Lyney said again, fists clenching around nothing. He hated Aether’s back. Not for the scar it held, but for the memories it never failed to remind Lyney of. Memories of Aether turning away and never looking back to say goodbye. Aether let out a heavy sigh, probably remembering when Lyney had told him about this specific fear of his. He turned around and leaned on the tree beside him. The movement would have been almost casual if it had not been for Aether’s red-rimmed eyes and tense posture. Lyney felt the floor go out under him, his stomach dropping at the sight of Aether so miserable. He began to speak again, without thinking, something he often did around the golden-haired man. “Aether, I’m so sorry. So so sorry. I wasn’t thinking. I've just been stupidly jealous with Venti here, because I'm needy and he was taking your attention away. I was worried that you would like him better than me, and that you would leave me so I freaked out. I just felt defensive when you said that thing about me not knowing who I am, so I lashed out. Because you’re right, Aether, I don’t know who I am. I never really have. I’ve spent my whole life being what people wanted me to be, but you have never wanted anything from me except my honesty. And time and time again I have failed to give you that.”
Lyney paused, taking in a shuddering breath as he looked at the wonderful man in front of him. The man who had fought dragons and Harbingers and Archons, the man who helped Arouet make drinks at the café when he had time, the man who forgave people for sins they could never repent for. Aether had relaxed ever so slightly, and Lyney continued to speak. “What I said about your sister was just me attacking you in the only way I knew how. I have never been a physical fighter, so I had to be an emotional one. Father… Arlecchino trained me to attack people where it hurts the most, their heart. So I took the horrible thing you and your sister went through and I hurt you with it. Archons, I’m so fucking sorry Aether. I’m a horrible person, a shell of a man who hurts those around him because it’s the only way he knows how to survive. But I want to be a man you can trust, Aether, a man you could… A man you could love. I, I do not deserve your forgiveness… But I just wanted you to know.”
The small flicker of light in Aether’s eyes told Lyney that he remembered those words. Aether had said the same thing to him almost a month ago, in the same cemetery, in the same true-blue night. Aether’s arms fell to his sides, his eyes still matching Lyney’s desperate stare. Whenever he looks at you, it’s as if he would rather die than look anywhere else.
“I know who you are, Lyney,” Aether finally spoke, voice louder than it usually was.
“What?” Lyney gasped out, unconsciously moving towards the other. Aether only gave a tiny smile in response, and Lyney suppressed the urge to grab Aether’s face and keep the smile there, burning it into his memory.
“I know who you are, I said. You’re a magician, one who maybe doesn’t love his craft like he used to, but still lives for making the audience happy. You’re a soldier, even though you aren’t the strongest. Still, you would die for your homeland, because you love it, even if it doesn’t love you back. You’re a horrific flirt, too. Maybe you put on a front so that the person doesn’t think you’re being truly genuine, but all of your compliments come from an honest place. On top of that, you’re scared of honesty, and you hate being sincere with other people because you’re terrified that they’ll pity what they find once you open up. They don’t, by the way. You’re a liar, but you lie to protect people. Sometimes you fuck it up a little, but you do everything to fix it, like you’re doing now. You’re an older brother. You would die for your siblings, and you care for them so deeply that you do everything for them, even if they don’t know it. Especially because they don’t know it. Most of all, Lyney, you’re the best man I have ever met, and I’ve been in love with you since you first said hello.”
If Lyney had thought the floor went out under him before, then by now, he was practically in the Abyss. A long time ago, Lyney would have scoffed at the concept of romantic love. The only love he needed back then was the love he had for his sister. To him, that was enough to get him through life. Now, though, Lyney realized that his younger self was an idiot. How could he have ever lived without the love he had for Aether? It was so big that it had made a home in his body, taking up space in his chest, surrounding his heart in a golden light. To live without his love would be like living without his lungs, impossible and unimaginable. Lyney walked towards Aether, his steps picking up in speed as he made his way across the cemetery. Within moments, the golden Traveler, Aether, was encased in Lyney’s arms, exactly as he should be. Someone as pure and wonderful as Aether needed to be protected, and in turn, Aether would protect that golden light in Lyney’s chest. They would protect each other’s love, making sure that it never goes away.
“I love you, oh Aether, I’m so in love with you. Mon cher, you’re the most wonderful man in all the worlds in the universe. I can’t… The love I have for you doesn’t even fit in my body. That's how in love with you I am, how in love with you I have always been. Please, Aether, stay with me. And once you have to go, let me come with you. Just please, let me keep loving you. Let me keep being the man I am, the man who is, most of all, in love with you.” Aether smiled brightly, looking up at the taller man with those glowing, topaz eyes of his. Aether had never been more beautiful, in pure white clothing with his hair down, smiling up at the man he loved.
Quickly, Lyney captured Aether’s lips in a kiss. He wrapped his arms around Aether, one hand grabbing at his waist and the other holding his torso closer to Lyney’s own. Aether put one hand to the side of Lyney’s face, while the other gently placed itself over the magician’s heart, the one he owned. The kiss was fast and desperate, as if they wanted to assure themselves that the other was still there. However, slowly it dissolved into something softer. Something sweeter. The pressure built between them quietly, as they traced the inside of each other’s mouths with their tongues, memorizing each corner. Lyney’s hands began to shake subtly, which he tried to hide by gripping Aether’s impossibly perfect waist tighter. Still, it seemed as though he didn’t need to, as Aether started to frantically move his hands over Lyney’s body. Aether let out a quiet whine, to which Lyney responded with a heated groan. The golden-haired man pawed at Lyney, wanting to push the man away and say something, but not wanting to end their kiss. Finally, they broke for air, and Aether gasped out, “Let’s go home, Lyney. Please?”
Lyney chuckled quietly, taking in the sight of Aether before him. Aether, angelic and honest, a sight that no one in the world got to see besides Lyney. A sight no one but Lyney would ever get to see. “Whatever do you mean, Aether? I’m always home with you.”
i remember who i am
when i’m with you
your love is tough,
your love is tried and true-blue