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Chapter Text

“Want me to sell you to him to clear our debt?” Porsche teases and Chay groans.

“That was a private conversation, hia. You were not supposed to hear that!”

He cackles but also reassuringly squeezes his little brother’s shoulder. They’ve just made it into the big hall, they can see the stage where newest pop sensation Wik is about to give his first big concert. Getting the tickets for this thing has cost Porsche an arm and a leg (also several sleepless nights and two cracked ribs in more risky underground fights) but seeing Chay so excited that he’s practically vibrating, makes it all worth it. The ribs have almost healed and Chay will probably remember this day for the rest of his teenage years.

All.

Worth it.

“It’s fine. You have a little crush. It’s cute.”

“I’m not cute!” Chay says with vehemence, looking very cute while doing it. Porsche still holds up his hands in surrender, then quickly puts one arm around him as a swarm of university students pushes past them, almost knocking his little brother off his feet. See, this is why Porsche needed to be here. Because Chay is fifteen and all gangly limbs and no mass. There was no way in hell Porsche would have let him go alone, even if spending the extra ticket money on an idol he personally has very little interest in made his eyes water. But it’s fine. On a day to day basis, he can give Chay so little that this feels great.

Out of the corner of his eye, he sees someone in a dark red suit walk past the line of waiting fans. The man is about Porsche’s height, but broader. The buttons of his black shirt are undone almost to his stomach, showing a lot of skin. And Porsche… looks. Well, of course he looks. On a woman, he would have looked too. A lot. And though there’s nothing particularly soft about that guy’s chest, Porsche can still admire a nice pair of pecs, right? That’s normal. It’s just an objectively nice chest.

To his horror, the man catches him staring. Porsche snaps his eyes back up to his face and tries to smile in a way that looks apologetic. His ears and cheeks feel uncomfortably hot. The guy winks at him and then vanishes into the VIP section.

He quickly turns back to his brother who is looking up at him with unsaid questions in his eyes. “Okay, okay, you’re not cute”, Porsche continues his teasing from earlier. This is familiar, this is safe. This is his baby brother with a giant crush on the latest idol, not some stranger with dark eyes and way too much skin on display. “I’m just saying, if Wik thought you were cute I bet you’d agree.”

“Well”, Chay gives that more thought than it really deserves. He’s adorable in his earnestness. “That is obviously different. Now please shut up, I think they’re starting.”

~°~°~°~

According to Porsche, the show is fine. According to Chay this is the best thing anyone has ever seen anywhere ever. He knows all of Wik’s lyrics by heart, screams his lungs out when the idol teasingly pulls up his shirt to show a sliver of skin and abs and generally has the time of his young life. Whenever Porsche looks at him, his chest feels too small for the amount of gratitude filling it up at seeing Chay this happy and carefree.

Otherwise, Porsche is busy keeping his little brother upright and away from any elbows or drinks. When he’s not doing that, he’s having a decently good time with the show. While the music is not his style, he can admit that Wik has a nice, soothing voice; surprisingly deep for someone so delicate.

After ninety minutes of dancing, teasing and singing, Wik thanks his fans for coming and announces that he will be signing posters for a limited time after the concert. The cheering is deafening and Porsche, of course, gets dragged towards another rapidly filling line.

When they arrive, there are at least fifty people in front of them. Porsche sighs. It’s been close to two hours now that he has had his last cigarette. He’s itching for a smoke.

“Go, hia”, Chay says. “It won’t be our turn for at least thirty minutes. I’ll be right here.”

Porsche is conflicted. Realistically speaking, they will stand in this line and shuffle forwards one fan at a time. But potentially, there could be a fire. A bomb. A kidnapping. Some bigger fans could push Chay aside and make him lose his spot. If he tried to fight them - because he is just about obsessed enough with Wik to throw common sense to the wind - he could get hurt.

“Hii~aaa”, Chay interrupts his internal monologue of doom. “Go! I’ll be fine.” His eyes turn glossy and he wiggles a little with happiness. “I’ll be practising what I’ll say to him once it’s my turn.”

Porsche is so, so fond of him. “Fine. But you stay right here, hear me? Right here. I’ll be back in ten minutes. If you’re not here when I come back, I’ll pull the fire alarm and ruin everybody’s evening.”

Chay looks horrified and promises to not move an inch (Unless the line is moving, hia, I am obviously going to move an inch then.). He shoves him towards one of the exits.

Porsche had not realized how loud it was inside the hall until he’s no longer in it. The air outside is fresh and saturated with the last remnants of rain. The sun is slowly settling, making the puddles gleam orange and golden. It’s beautiful. And inside is his little brother, about to exchange ten words or less with his favourite sensation. Porsche already knows he’ll spend all evening helping Chay overanalyse every last one of them. Today’s good. Today is a good, good day.

Porsche lights his cigarette and takes in that blessed, first drag, feeling his nerves settle.

“May I?” he hears someone ask next to him. Porsche almost swallows his smoke when he sees chest-guy again. Still in the red suit, still with the wide open shit. Only now he’s also carrying a frankly massive bouquet of flowers. There are so many that his hand barely wraps around the stems and those are big hands… Porsche’s brains goes a little static-y. He shakes himself out of it to notice the cigarette dangling from the stranger’s free hand. “I seem to have forgotten my lighter”, the man says.

Porsche nods dumbly and goes to retrieve his but before he can pull it out and offer it to the other man, the stranger has put the cigarette between his lips and leans in, touching the tip of it again Porsche's burning one.

And holy shit. Porsche knows that move. He’s pulled that move before. On girls! Now he’s blinking owlishly at chest-guy whose face is so close Porsche has to go a little cross-eyed. The man’s not looking at him, his dark eyes lowered, his lashes fanning out against his pale skin. Porsche can feel the warmth radiating off of him. And though he smells mostly smoke, he does detect a hint of cologne, something deep and rich that makes heat bloom in his belly.

He hears the stranger take a big inhale, just to light his cigarette, Porsche tells himself, surely not to smell him in return. The other man pulls back but he stays much closer than he was before, his dark eyes tracking over Porsche’s face with a mild kind of amusement.

“Thanks”, he says, his voice softer than Porsche would have expected from such a big guy. “What’s your name?”

“Porsche”, Porsche manages, but just about. He feels… off kilter.

“Like the car”, the stranger smiles, “are you fast and expensive as well?”

Right now, Porsche feels rather slow, like his thoughts are moving through molasses, and his ratty trainers don’t exactly scream luxury either. “Sometimes”, he responds though it comes out more like a question.

“And other times you’re slow and accessible?” the stranger says and now Porsche knows he’s being teased. Even if something wiggly and hot awakens in his stomach (why did he have to say it like that).

“You know it’s rude to ask for someone’s name and then not introduce yourself, right?”

That startles a laugh out of the other man. “You’re precious. And it’s Kinn.”

“Well, nice to meet you, Kinn.”

“Very nice to meet you, Porsche.”

Porsche points to the bouquet. The thing looks heavy. And like it could do some damage. “That’s a lot of flowers, Kinn.”

The other man grins. “It’s an inside joke.”

Porsche gives him a bemused smile before he finishes his cigarette, snuffs the bud out against the wall and puts it back in the package.

“Well, I have to go.”

Kinn’s expression turns wistful. “Do you have to?”

Porsche looks at him and his heart does a weird little tremble-y thing. But Chay’s inside and he is waiting. “Yeah, sorry”, he actually means it. He pulls open the door but stops to looks back at the other man for a second. “Hey Kinn?” One of those thick eyebrows lifts. “Did you really forget your lighter?”

The grin Porsche receives tells him everything.

~°~°~°~

Back in line, Chay squints at him. “Is everything okay, hia? Your face is all red.”

Porsche coughs. “Never mind. Have you figured out what you’re going to say to him?”

“I have”, Chay whispers with the most besotted little smile.

Then it’s finally their turn. Wik greets them with a downright beatific smile. They must have touched up his make-up and clothes because while his hair is artfully tussled, he doesn’t look like someone who just spent ninety minutes jumping up and down on stage.

“Hi, thank you so much for coming. Who am I making this out to?” the idol asks, his speaking voice just as rich as his singing voice, one of his posters and a marker in hand.

Chay opens his mouth but all that comes out is a breathless little squeak. Wik smiles and patiently waits for Chay to gather his bearings. But Porsche’s little brother isn’t gathering anything. All that’s flashing behind his huge eyes is the 404 error message.

“Chay”, Porsche finally helps him out, “his name is Chay.”

Wik, apparently used to this kind of behaviour from his fans, simply nods and smiles. “What a cute name.” He writes it on the poster, draws a little heart next to it and then signs. When Chay takes it from him, his hands are shaking so hard Porsche is worried he’ll crumble it. His brother would be desolate if he did that.

And then all the words that were stuck behind Chay’s teeth tumble out at once. But not in the correct order. Or in anything resembling an appropriate conversation with a stranger.

“I love you, P’Wik”, Chay says, breathless, “I love you so much, you’re the most talented person on earth. I want to get into a good music program because of you. I listen to your songs every day. I watch your videos every night. You’re the most inspiring, beautiful, amazing person I have ever met.” (Porsche tries and fails not to be a tiny bit insulted by that.) “And if my brother wanted to sell me to you to cover our debts, I wouldn’t even mind. You wouldn’t even have to pay. I’d be yours for free.”

Chay’s brain finally catches up with his mouth. He makes a horrified little gasping sound. Wik blinks twice but then composes himself admirably quickly.

“Well, Chay, that is certainly good to know.”

His little brother slaps both hands in front of his face, trying to hide, only to immediately draw one back. “Oh no, my poster.”

Wik opens his mouth while his hand reaches up and Porsche is almost sure he’s about to offer him a new one but Chay has already turned around around and he’s fleeing.

“Shit”, Porsche says. He gives the idol a quick little wave. “Thanks for being cool about this, man. Great show, by the way.” And then he’s booking it after his little brother.

Chapter Text

Porsche finds his little brother huddled against a wall, as far away from the main entrance and the bustling crowd of fans as he could get. He has crouched down and has both arms wrapped around his knees, head tugged between them. Chay’s curled himself into the smallest little ball he could manage and despite the whole situation being a little funny, it still tugs at Porsche’s heartstrings. Seeing his baby brother upset, even through an embarrassment of his own making, will never leave him unaffected.

He squats down next to the boy and wraps an arm around him. Chay lets himself be pulled against Porsche’s side but refuses to emerge from his cocoon of arms and knees.

“I want to die”, he sniffles, dramatic as he has become prone to be ever since he turned fourteen.

“Come on, squirt, it’s not that bad.” He gently squeezes him.

“Don’t lie to make me feel better, hia. This was the most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to me in my life.”

“That’s just because you don’t remember being two years old and drinking out of the toilet”, Porsche tries to lighten the mood, but Chay won’t be consoled.

“I can never go to any of his concerts ever again.” He sounds absolutely distraught at the thought. “I can’t even breathe the same air as he does.” With a sudden jerk, Chay emerges from his tangle of limbs to glare at Porsche. “Hia, we have to leave the country!”

Porsche laughs and fondly ruffles his hair. “Sorry, kiddo, but we don’t have the funds to move to the next city, let alone a whole other country.”

All of a sudden, there’s movement behind them. A door Porsche has previously missed gets opened and they both have to scramble to get out of the way to avoid being hit by it.

“Oh”, says Wik.

“Oh no”, squeaks Chay and immediately darts behind Porsche.

“Oh”, says Porsche because the person pushing through just behind Wik is none other than Kinn, still carrying his oversized bouquet. His dark eyes light up when he recognises him.

“Porsche”, he says and his voice is as warm as his smile. “What a pleasant surprise. What are you doing here?”

“I’m just”, he gestures behind himself, where Chay is still pretending he doesn’t exist.

“Wait”, Wik says, squinting between Kinn and Porsche, “you know each other?”

“Barely”, Porsche answers as Kinn says: “Not well”, then he looks Porsche dead in the eyes and adds “not yet.”

Heat erupts in his chest and belly, making Porsche swallow against the sudden dryness of his mouth. He barely notices the idol rolling his eyes at Kinn.

“Didn’t peg you for a pop fan”, Porsche says, his eyes tracking from Kinn to the idol and back. They seem close. Kinn obviously is some sort of VIP guest with the way he was able to skip past the line earlier and is leaving with the idol know.

"Oh, I wouldn’t miss Wik’s concerts for the world”, Kinn says with the brightest smile. Surprisingly, the smaller man seems more annoyed than touched by that statement. “For you", Kinn carries on, his grin big enough to show the dimples in his cheeks (The man has dimples. This information is not good for Porsche’s heart!), then he tries to hand the weapons-grade bouquet of flowers to Wik.

"Oh, fuck off", the idol says. Porsche didn't think idols were allowed to swear like that and immediately likes Wik a little bit more.

Kinn is not phased at all by the insult, it seems a familiar song and dance.

"Khun picked them out for you”, he says innocently but there is something sly about his smile.

A myriad of conflicting emotions flit over Wik's pretty face at that. Then he reaches out and takes the flowers with careful hands.

"Tell him I said thank you and if he ever... there will always be a spot reserved for him."

Kinn smiles at him. It’s a lot softer this time. "He knows. One of those days, nong."

Wik shakes himself out of whatever melancholy has overcome him and makes a gagging noise. “Stop calling me that.”

Kinn seems to take that as a challenge. “Make me.”

“You know I will.”

There’s the slightest hint of worry in Kinn’s gaze now. “You wouldn’t.”

“Do not test me.”

The older man gives an exasperated sigh and then looks over at Porsche for back-up. “Little brothers, am I right? So ungrateful.”

“He’s your… oh, you’re his brother. Of course.” Porsche does not want to examine the intense relief that is flooding his chest at this clarification. After all, he barely knows Kinn. It is still a very high possibility that a man like him has a boyfriend at home.

For some reason, it doesn’t occur to Porsche to consider a potential girlfriend. Which, he belatedly realizes, is an oversight. Just because Kinn flirted with him (he did flirt, that was flirting 101, the thing with the cigarette; Porsche would know, because Porsche flirts on a professional level most nights he’s at Hum Bar) does not mean he is solely into men.

“And who is this?” Kinn pulls him from his musings, craning his neck a little to get a glimpse of Chay. Porsche (again) unsuccessfully (again!) tries to pry his baby brother out of his hiding spot. Chay only makes a distraught little noise and clings harder to Porsche’s back, refusing to be moved.

Porsche sighs. “That is Chay. My little brother.”

“He doesn’t like strangers?” Kinn guesses.

“Errrm”, Porsche stalls and his eyes meet Wik’s. Right. Kinn has no way of knowing what went down twenty minutes ago to put Porsche’s little brother in a state of fatal embarrassment.

The idol takes a step closer. “Actually, Porsche was just hanging around to deliver my newest possession to me. Thank you for taking such good care of him, I’ll take it from here.”

“Huh?” makes Porsche.

“I don’t follow”, says Kinn.

Chay lifts his head to shoot a one-eyed peek over Porsche’s shoulder at the idol.

“You see, Porsche sold little Chay here to me to clear the family debt. Being the smart business man I am, I accepted, naturally. I think his hair-colour will go very nicely with my furniture”, Wik explains to Kinn before turning back to Porsche. “So, how much for him?”

Porsche looks down at his baby brother who has eyes for nothing and no one but the singer.

“I’m pretty sure he said he’d be yours for free.”

The idols clicks his tongue. “Precious things should never be given away for free.”

Next to him, his brother emerges further, eyes wide as saucers and lured by the other boy’s charm.

“Ten million baht then”, Porsche says.

“Deal”, Wik accepts immediately. Damn, for a supposedly new idol he must be making bank already. He pulls his wallet from his trouser’s back pocket. “Cash or credit?”

Porsche finally manages to sling one arm around Chay and pull him out from behind himself and into his side. He gives him a long look, as if he seriously needs to consider this.

“On second thought, I’m afraid I’m going to keep him.”

Wik sighs like this is a huge disappointment to him, but when he looks at Chay, his smile is soft. “Understandable. He surely is one of a kind.”

Chay stares back at the singer like he’s the only person in the world. Porsche is fairly sure that he’s forgotten about the two other people standing right next to him, one of those being his brother.

“I’m sorry if I crossed a line”, Chay finally says, shyly glancing at the other boy. Privately, Porsche thinks that there was no if about it but his little brother has just about regained his courage to speak to the idol, so he won’t shut him down by correcting him.

Wik, once again, is gracious. “At least you didn’t ask if you could drink my bath water.”

Porsche can’t stop the snort that comes out of him. “No! People don’t actually ask that, do they?” He’s both amused and horrified – and a little bit disgusted by the idea of drinking anyone’s bath water, even if you’ve formed the most intense para-social relationship with the person.

A pained expression crosses over Wik’s pretty face. “I assure you, they do. Unfortunately.”

Chay gives the idol a shy little smile at that before his eyes trail over to the man standing next to Wik. Porsche would bet money that this is the first time that he’s noticed him.

“Oh”, his little brother says, perking up. “You’re P’Kinn!”

Porsche frowns at him. So does Kinn.

“Come again?” he says.

“Kinn Anakinn Theerapanyakun”, Chay says with an innocent smile. “The head of the Theerapanyakun family.”

“And you know this man how?” Porsche would be very interested in hearing about how his baby brother got to know this full grown adult he himself has only met less than an hour ago.

“Yes”, Kinn agrees, “how do you know me?” There’s something odd happening to his face. The smile is still there, but it barely reaches the corners of his mouth, let alone his eyes. He no longer looks soft or charming. His dark eyes are narrowed and they are looking at Porsche’s little brother like he is a threat. Something to take care of. It makes the hairs on Porsche’s neck stand up.

Chay’s still smiling at him, oblivious as ever, though he seems a little embarrassed. “We, uhm, that is, the club. For him”, he points at the idol, “the fan club. We saw photos of you with P’Wik.” From there, it apparently took a whole lot of collective sleuthing and the help of some online backwards picture searches and they’d found Kinn. “We didn’t know you were his brother though”, Chay ends his tale and has the decency to go a little pink around the edges.

Next to Kinn, Wik makes a gagging sound. “Gross!”

His brothers gives him a very unimpressed look. The darkness that seemed to roll off of him in waves just a minute ago has vanished. “Don’t worry, you’re not exactly my type either.”

Wik looks him dead in the eyes and says: “We both know that’s a lie.”

And that is… that is not something Porsche or his little brother needed to hear. He valiantly ignores the little pang in his chest at that bit of information. So what if Kinn is into small, pretty men with delicate features? That’s none of Porsche’s business. Until five minutes ago, he was sure he’d never see Kinn again.

“Let’s go celebrate your first big concert”, Kinn changes the subject and though it’s not a smooth transition and the awkwardness of Wik’s previous statement still lingers, the idol allows it.

“Fine”, he says, “I am starving. You should come.”

It takes both Porsche and Chay a moment to realize that the last bit was addressed at them. Or really, Porsche’s baby brother, the superfan. Porsche is fairly sure he is just being invited out of courtesy. And maybe because Wik can make the educated guess that Porsche would never let his underage baby brother climb into spotless sleek cars, like the one that just pulled up, with people Porsche barely knows.

“Yes”, Kinn agrees and he’s looking at Porsche in that way again that makes Porsche’s insides feel like they are made out of gummy string and heat. Like he is hungry too. Just not necessarily for food (though Porsche is not one to turn down a free meal). “You should.”

“Yes, we should. Please, hia, can we?” Chay chimes in and that is the nail in the already flimsy coffin of Porsche’s social graces. It would probably be more polite to turn the offer down and let the brothers enjoy their evening in peace.

But it was Wik who offered in the first place. Besides, having dinner with his idol will sustain Chay’s crush for weeks. Porsche does not have the heart to deny him that.

Wik is moving towards the vehicle and like he's being pulled by a magnet, Chay is moving with him. Which leaves Porsche no other choice but to move too. Kinn holds the door for him and his smile makes Porsche completely ignore the fact that they are about to climb into the backseat of an obviously expensive car with two men who, for all intents and purposes, are still strangers.

But Wik is an idol and Kinn is just some businessman. What’s the worst that could happen?

Chapter Text

Porsche is not punished for trusting strangers by finding himself and his little brother in a nondescript warehouse, being sold organ for organ (a thought that only occurred to him once the doors were firmly closed behind them). Chay, apparently, has no such worries because after a couple of moments of star-struck staring, he manages to strike up a conversation with the idol. It starts out as one-sided adoration that Wik gracefully though monosyllabicly accepts, but it quickly morphs into a discussion about his music videos.

Chay wants to know everything. Where Wik got the inspiration. Who designed the costumes.

Was the leather-lace combination Wik’s idea or his manager’s (Wik’s)?

What was the name of the cat he held in another video (there were actually two cats and their names are Mickey and Minnie)?

Chay soaks it all up like a sponge. Every new bit of information triggers at least three additional questions.

By the time they have reached the restaurant, the idol and his baby brother are deep in conversation about the symbolism of cats in all of Wik’s music videos. A subject that obviously warrants extensive analysis.

Porsche and Kinn trail after them. Porsche is pretty sure that at least his baby brother has already forgotten there were people other than Wik in that car with him.

“Are you a fan too?” Kinn wants to know, watching the younger boys with an almost vulnerable fondness.

“No offence to your little brother”, Porsche says diplomatically, “but I don’t think I am his target audience.”

Kinn laughs at that. “And what do you think his target audience is?”

Porsche wordlessly points at his little brother. Chay almost kept walking in circles in the revolving door because he was so focused on the other boy. Wik has to physically pull him out and into the restaurant.

“Much younger. More impressionable. Much more susceptible to a pretty face.”

“I’m susceptible to a pretty face as well”, Kinn hums and looks him directly in the eyes. It’s Porsche’s time to almost get stuck in the door, but he saves himself the embarrassment just in time. Kinn’s eyes are still bright with amusement.

“Oh wow”, Porsche says upon taking in the luxury of the interior. Everything is marble and gold. Also, Porsche is severely, horribly, hopelessly underdressed. Any moment know, someone will come up to them and ask them to please go home and return only once they fit in at a place as fine as this.

Instead, one of the servers almost falls over himself to greet Kinn and Wik. And then Porsche in his ratty trainers and his little brother in his Wik-shirt like they are long awaited celebrities too.

“Khun Kinn, what a pleasure to see you”, the server says. Porsche notices the server noticing hi scuffed up shoes and baggy pants, but the man doesn’t utter a word. Instead, they are lead through the restaurant and into a separate area where the tables are spaced further apart and they have a perfect view into an opulent garden. Porsche wasn’t aware there was this much green and so many blossoms in the middle of the city.

Kinn pulls out his chair for him. For a moment, Porsche does not know what to do with that. The gesture is so novel and so completely unnecessary. Porsche beats up people in showy fights for the entertainment of a bloodthirsty crowd. No one has ever pulled out a chair for him.

He sits down gingerly and catches Wik shooting his older brother a look. Is this common behaviour for Kinn? Does he do this with all the ‘pretty faces’ he meets? Is that where Wik’s annoyance stems from?

“Anything you want”, Kinn says as the server brings the cards, “though I am partial to the steak.”

Porsche tries and fails to suppress a minor freak out upon noticing that there are no prices listed on the menu. Not that he’d have the money to pay for a place like this if there were, but it adds that extra bit of anxiety.

Across the table, Chay eyes the rows of unfamiliar cutlery with trepidation.

“Your treat”, the idol says and pulls his little brother from his silent worry. Chay goes pale, looking around the grand restaurant, the gold plated chandeliers at the ceiling.

“W-what? I…”, he fumbles for his wallet. Wik laughs and puts his hand over his, gently forcing it back down.

“I’m kidding, Chay. You are obviously my guest.”

Porsche’s little brother is only slightly reassured. “But this place looks so expensive.”

“It’s fine, really. Besides, I know the owner.”

Porsche does not miss the way Kinn’s mouth turns up at one corner. He leans in so he won’t disturb Chay’s bubble. “It’s you, isn’t it? This place is yours.”

Kinn’s smile grows bigger. “Who knows”, he says conspiratorially. Then he leans back and asks more loudly: “Champagne?”

“Yes please”, Chay pipes up and Porsche lunges over the table to smack him on the arm. A move that Chay both expected and is very good at evading by now. He’s grinning from ear to ear.

“In your dreams, you little brat. You can have juice or some tea.”

Chay pretends to pout but immediately lights up when Wik mentions the latte art they apparently make here. “Anything I want?” he makes sure. “Even a picture of you?”

The other boy’s eyes go wide, the way they do when Porsche’s little brother says something particularly unhinged. But his smile seems genuinely amused.

“Only one way to find out.”

Dinner is amazing. Porsche is sure he’s never had food as nice as this – even if he is not convinced about the champagne. There were some other bottles on the menu that he would have been more interested in trying, but given that they are already invited to all this opulence, he does not have the nerve to ask.

Chay, despite having been denied alcohol, thoroughly enjoys himself all evening. Though Porsche is convinced that his little brother barely tasted anything and would have had just as grand a time, if he’d talked to his idol crush in a fast food chain instead.

Halfway through dinner, Wik introduces himself as Kim. Meaning that his alias is just his real name spelled backwards. Porsche thinks it’s a little on the nose. Chay acts as if he’s never seen anything more clever. Then again, Wik could fall flat on his ass tripping over nothing and Porsche’s little brother would still think that’s the most amazing thing he got to witness all day. Porsche’s little brother might be a bit biased.

“What about you?” Porsche wants to know. “Do you have another name too, to hide your secret second identity?”

Kinn laughs like Porsche just made a great joke. When in all honesty, that was a mediocre joke at best.

“No”, he replies, “no secret second identity for me. I’m afraid what you see is what you get.”

“Eh, you’re not so bad”, Porsche says and manages to hold his gaze despite going warm and pink around the ears. Kinn seems genuinely delighted to hear him admit that.

Like the gentleman he is, Kinn insists upon taking them home. At this point, Porsche has been fed, pilfered with expensive alcohol and his little brother is beaming with happiness, there is simply no cell left in his body to worry about letting these strangers know where they live.

“This is us”, Chay says as he pushes open the gate. Kinn and Wik – Kim share a look.

“Anyone can just wander in?” the idol asks.

Chay does not know what to say to that and casts searching eyes towards Porsche.

“I’ve been meaning to fix the lock”, Porsche lies. The truth is, the gate as been broken for years and there’s simply never been lock-repairing money in the budget. Besides, the only people Porsche wishes he could keep out won’t be deterred by a simple gate.

“I’ll walk you to your door”, Kim decides and both boys go ahead. Kinn hangs back and so does Porsche.

“Thank you for the meal”, Porsche says, scuffing at the dirty driveway with his trainers.

“My pleasure”, Kinn replies like it’s as simple as that. Maybe in his world is it. “Good night, Porsche.”

Porsche does not acknowledge the pang of disappointment shooting through his gut. He does not. This was a lovely evening, a nice thing of Kinn to do for the big brother of his own little brother’s fan, but that is it. They clearly come from different worlds and people like Kinn do not mingle with people like Porsche. Not outside of romances and maybe fairy tales. Porsche lives in the real world and in the real world, rich people do not swoop in to make your life easier. They’re just not a part of your life.

“Good night, Kinn”, he says with the brightest smile he can fake, then he walks over to where Chay and the idol are still chatting.

“It’s a school night, tomorrow”, Porsche says and Chay gives him his saddest puppy dog eyes.

“Five more minutes, hia.”

Like the push-over he is, Porsche caves. “Five minutes.”

Seven minutes later, his little brother joins him in the kitchen.

“Happy with your day?” Porsche asks though he is fairly certain he knows the answer. Instead of replying, his little brother comes over to give him the biggest hug his scrawny body is capable of.

“Thank you for the tickets, hia”, Chay mumbles into his shoulder. Porsche wraps both arms around him and holds him against his chest, wishing once again he could keep him in there to protect him from everything bad in the world forever.

“Happy you had fun, squirt.”

Porsche wakes to the creaking of their front gate. He is not expecting guests and that thought wakes him up more effectively than being doused with cold water would. A quick glance towards his phone tells him that it’s eight thirty in the morning. Quite frankly, an ungodly hour, given that he is coming out of a night shift.

Still, adrenaline pumping through his veins, he stumbles out of his bed and over to Chay’s room.

“Wake up”, he shakes his little brother, who blearily blinks at him. “There’s someone at the front gate. Go hide. Do not come out until I personally get you.”

Just like him, Chay is immediately awake. He’s also pale and his eyes are saucer-wide. Porsche would love to comfort him but there is no time. “Go!” he says harshly and Chay finally tumbles out of his bed and into the little hiding space between his desk and the closet. It’s not great. But it will hide him from a superficial search.

“When do you come out?” Porsche asks.

“When you tell me to, hia”, Chay answers obediently, his voice still scratchy from sleep. Porsche's heart wants to ache with the injustice of this being the best he can do for his boy, but he shoves the sentiment down. There is no time. Porsche kisses him on the forehead and then pushes the chair in front of him for that little bit of extra hiding.

Then he makes his way to the ground level.

He’s just in shorts and his night shirt, barefoot. Fighting like this is not ideal. He’d like the help of heavy boots. He does not have time to put them on. Someone’s already at their front door. Porsche can see an arm and a pant leg from the top of the stairs.

He takes a deep breath, tries not to think about his still healing rips. Instead, he thinks about his little brother, huddled underneath his desk upstairs. It imbues him with the bravery he might not have felt without Chay. Fighting for himself is hard some days; fighting for his baby brother is the easiest thing in the world.

Porsche draws back his shoulders and pulls himself up to all six feet of him before he comes down the stairs with his jaw set and his fists ready.

Kinn’s entire face brightens once he spots him through the glass. He gives Porsche a little wave and then holds up his left hand from which a white take-out bag is dangling. Porsche is so thrown by the image of Kinn on his front door step, already dressed in a suit and a blood red shirt that’s most of the way undone, that he has to stop for a moment to switch gears.

Instead of a beating, it seems he’s going to be served breakfast. Not that this development isn’t vastly preferable, it just takes Porsche a moment to get with the programme.

“Morning, sleepyhead”, Kinn greets him cheerfully when Porsche slides open the glass door, his dark gaze trailing from Porsche’s ruffled hair down to his worn thin shirt and then his naked legs. His eyes linger on his thighs before Kinn drags them back up to his face. Heat zings through Porsche’s stomach, even if he’s a little annoyed at the unannounced, early visit. It’s only been four hours since Porsche fell into bed and he is tired. Also jittery with adrenaline that now has nowhere to go.

“I rang, but nobody came.”

“Yeah, the bell is broken. I’ve been meaning to fix that.” That, too, is a lie. Porsche’s friends text him before they pop over and the people he would like a warning about don’t bother ringing bells or respecting locks. “What are you doing here?”

“I wanted to see you.” Porsche cannot help the quite frankly goofy smile that over-takes his face upon hearing that. “Can I come in?”

He steps aside and Kinn enters their living room. In his pristine suit and spit shined shoes he looks very out of place among Porsche’s ratty old couch and ancient TV, which was not state of the art when Porsche was a boy and could now probably rouse the interest of museums.

Kinn walks over to the kitchen with all the confidence of a man who knows he is allowed to be wherever he wants and sets his bag down. Porsche trails after him, feeling like a guest in his own kitchen.

“You look adorable”, Kinn says and reaches out to brush his fingers through his hair. “Did I wake you?”

“Hm, just got back from a night-shift.” Porsche turns his face into the other man’s touch and enjoys the simple comfort of a warm hand against his cheek.

“Ah, sorry”, but he doesn’t seem very sorry with the way he smiles at him. His fingers trail down to Porsche’s neck. Leaning in comes as naturally as breathing.

There’s a bumping sound from upstairs. Porsche jerks back. Kinn’s fingers twitch against his neck, trying to keep him from getting away.

“I guess your little brother is up.”

“Shit, Chay! I gotta go free Chay.”

“Free Chay?” Kinn echoes.

“Yeah, uhm, I told him to hide in case… well, I didn’t know it was you.”

Kinn’s impressive brows draw together. “Who did you expect?”

Porsche stalls. Does he want Kinn to know about the shitshow that is his life? No. Definitely not.

“Nobody”, Porsche lies and then bounces up the stairs before Kinn can ask any more questions.

He catches Chay in front of his closet, which has spilled half its contents over his bedroom floor. Alright, that solves the mystery of the bumping sound. Upon spotting Porsche, his little brother lowers the broken baseball bat he was holding.

Porsche puts both his hands on his hips and his best disappointed big brother expression on his face.

“What did I say about you being a hero?”

Chay has the decency to look apologetic. “Not to be.”

“And what were you about to do with that?”

“Look, it was just in case.”

“In case of what?”

“In case you needed help, hia.”

“If I need help, there’s not a whole lot you’re going to do about it with a broken piece of wood.” He goes over to him and takes his head in both hands, shaking it a little. “We talked about this, Chay.”

“Who was downstairs?” his little brother changes the subject and because he does not want to waste their whole morning lecturing him, Porsche allows it.

“Kinn.”

“Oh”, Chay looks relieved, then hopeful. “Is P’Kim with him?”

“No.” Chay’s face falls. “But he did bring breakfast. Get dressed.”

Porsche leaves him to take his own advice, namely put on something a little bit more decent and brush his teeth. He’s a little sorry he didn’t get to kiss Kinn but it was probably for the best, given his morning breath.

By the time Porsche returns, dressed in his nicest button down and minty fresh, Kinn has managed to locate plates and cutlery.
“Where is your coffee maker?” he wants to know.

Porsche shakes his head. “Sorry, don’t have one. Not a big coffee fan.”

Kinn looks at him like Porsche just admitted to not owning a toothbrush. “No coffee maker?” he asks, just to make really sure.

Porsche can’t help but laugh. “No, sorry. But there’s a little shop around the corner. I could go get you some. Addict.”

Kinn gives that some serious thought before shaking his head. “I’ll come better prepared next time then.”

“Next time”, Porsche agrees and squirms a little with the knowledge that this will be a repeat performance, Kinn bringing him breakfast and needing his fix of caffeine.

Breakfast is delicious and plentiful. Kinn has brought enough for Chay, Porsche and six additional people. Porsche is very happy with the knowledge that he won’t have to worry about lunch. Or dinner. Chay’s tugging in with the hearty appetite of a growing boy. Porsche makes sure he has seconds and then thirds. This is definitely a step up from stolen chips and instant ramen. He could get used to this - no. No absolutely not. Those are dangerous thoughts to have. Kinn’s presence in his life is not a sure thing and so aren’t his offerings of food or his easy reassurance.

Porsche tries to remind himself of that and to not get used to this. He fails desperately and when Kinn has to leave, way too soon, he catches himself walking him all the way to the front gate, where another sleek black car is waiting for him.

“P’Kinn! P’Kinn, wait! Please!” Chay comes running out the house, carrying an envelope. He hands it over to Kinn. “Can you give that to P’Kim, please?”

Kinn takes the envelope and puts it in the inside pocket of his suit jacket. “I’ll make sure it gets to him”, he promises with the severity of someone swearing an oath. It’s only when he’s looking over at Porsche that there’s a sprinkle of amusement in his eyes.

“See you soon?” Porsche asks, hating a little how hopeful he sounds. He’d like to kiss him goodbye. But they’re having too much of an audience for Porsche’s taste.

“Very soon”, Kinn promises. Then he climbs into the car and vanishes behind mirrored windows.

“What did you give him?” Porsche wants to know as he and Chay watch the car take off.

“My number”, Chay says and Porsche cannot help but admire his baby brother’s bravery.

There’s a familiar broad back already at the bar when Porsche comes in for his shift. He shakes his head, but the butterflies in his stomach are happy to see Kinn again so soon. Very happy.
“Why are you here?” Porsche wants to know once he’s taken his spot behind the counter.

“Good evening, Porsche”, Kinn says in that soft voice of his. “Can’t I just enjoy the view?” His eyes are bright with mirth. Porsche can feel his heart squeezing almost painfully he’s so flustered. And happy. And stupid. This man will give him a heart-attack at the tender age of twenty-one. This man he barely knows, Porsche tries to remind himself, but his body wants to hear none of it. His body wants to get close, closer, climb over the counter and into Kinn’s lap.

“Shameless”, he accuses, trying to bite away the loopy smile that is threatening to split his face. Kinn laughs.

“Oh sweetheart, you have no idea.”

Porsche swallows against the dryness in his throat. To distract himself and also to not get completely unprofessional during work hours, he starts preparing a drink.

Kinn watches him with a heavy gaze. “Aren’t you going to ask me what my poison is?”

“Let me surprise you”, Porsche responds and then puts a dark red drink in front of him.

Kinn seems very pleased with him and takes a sip. “Bitter”, he observes.

“Well, you don’t strike me as a man who likes overly sweet things.”

“On occasion”, Kinn says and the look he gives Porsche makes it obvious he talking about neither food nor drink. Porsche can only hope that the pink light from the bar masks the violent blush that is spreading down his neck.

“Give me your arm?” he asks and holds out a hand. Kinn raises a questioning eyebrow but obliges him.

Porsche folds back the expensive shirt with care and then gets a pen to write his number across Kinn’s skin in bold black ink.

Once he has caught on to what Porsche intends to do, the other man lets out a bright laugh. He does hold very still though.
“Call me”, Porsche says when he is finished.

“God, you are adorable”, Kinn chuckles and then gabs him by the collar to drag him halfway across the counter-top and kiss the breath right out of him.

Chapter Text

Wik is doing a promotional shoot for some sort of skin-care brand and Chay got VIP backstage passes for it because that is, apparently, a thing. That people want. Watching glorified ads and paying for the pleasure. Well, the other fans paid. Chay, and by extension Porsche, are here as special guests.

Kinn is not. Probably too busy running his many successful businesses and Porsche is bored out of his mind. Like the dutiful guardian he is, he insisted on accompanying his little brother, but Porsche is regretting it more and more with every minute. Apart from watching Kim smile beatifically into a camera, there is nothing happening. No unruly fans to protect Chay from. They don’t even serve alcohol at this gig, only bottled water with a fancy label. Porsche was not needed here.

He yawns.

“Hia!” Chay hisses from his right and gives him a look like Porsche just let one loose. “Please don’t embarrass me in front of P’Kim.”

“Sorry, sorry”, Porsche mumbles and Chay turns back to taking another million photos of his idol.

For over an hour, they watch Wik sell a skin-care routine that costs more than what Porsche spends on food each month. By the time it’s finally, finally over, Porsche has completely zoned out.

“Thank you for coming”, Kim says in that melodic voice of his. Someone has put glitter in his dark hair and the studio lights hit him just right, making him iridescent and sparkling.

Next to him, Chay makes a sound like he’s dying.

“You were wonderful, P’Kim”, he says, completely out of breath just from looking at Kim. “This was the most amazing thing I have ever watched.”

Really, Porsche wants to say. Watching some millionaire sell overpriced skin-care is the best thing his little brother has ever watched. Really?!

But he knows better than to take jabs at Chay’s beloved idol; if the teasing wouldn’t go right over Chay’s head anyway. Because in that moment, Chay is one hundred percent serious.

Kim ducks his head and smiles. “Like always, you are being too kind”, he says modestly, but he does seem pleased.

“I am speaking the truth and nothing but the truth!” Chay objects. “Right, hia?”

“Huh?” Porsche hasn’t really been paying attention. He looks up at the idol. “Uh, sure. The thing with the hair, it looks nice.”

“It looks amazing!” Chay immediately corrects him. “You look amazing, P’Kim. I mean, you always do. But you look especially amazing today. Can I touch?”

“Chay”, Porsche tries to get him to calm down a little.

“The hair?” Kim asks, a little unsure and points at his glittery head.

“Yes!”

“Chay”, Porsche tries again, faintly, but his little brother has already stepped up and ran his hands full on through Kim’s produce-laden hair. Porsche can see the traces his fingers have left in it.

“Careful, that glitter is going to get everywhere”, Kim says. Chay looks at his sparkling hands and slightly tilts them left and right to make the little particles catch the light.

“I don’t mind. There’s a little bit of you on me now.” He sounds enamoured with the concept.
“Chay.” It’s Kim who says it this time and he is slightly pink around the edges, but his tone is both fond and helpless. Porsche knows the feeling. The things that come out of his little brother’s mouth sometimes. But he’s being so genuine about it that it’s impossible to be mad at him.

The idol visibly pulls himself together. “Just let me take all of this off and then we can go eat something?”

At the mention of food, Porsche perks up. “Let’s go.”

“Do you have to?” Chay pouts.

“I’m not going to dinner with all of this”, Kim gestures towards his make-up and hair.

The pout intensifies.

Kim goes to dinner with a full face of make-up and glitter in his hair.

"You hang up first."

Pause.

"No you."

Porsche's little brother is walking circles around their couch, his phone cradled against his ear like it's his first born. 

"I'm not going to. Nuh uh."

Porsche doesn't even have to ask who's on the other end. He's also this close to just taking the mobile away from Chay and doing it for him. It was sweet the first five minutes. Now it's ventured into annoying.

If he was worried about Wik – Kim not accepting Chay’s number, he didn’t have to be. The two of them have been talking every day for a week straight.

Wik is doing something in Korea and despite Chay’s begging, Porsche had decided that school was more important than leaving the country to go watch his favourite idol and new friend.

So, phone calls it is for these two. Secretly, Porsche wonders if he did himself such a favour by denying his little brother. Chay’s a good student. How bad would missing one week really have been? And then he didn’t have to listen to all of this.

"No, you go first – oh." Chay pulls the phone away from his ear and looks at it like it killed his kitten. "He hung up." He glances towards Porsche, a glimmer of utter betrayal in his eyes.

"Like you told him to twenty times?"

"I didn't think he would do it", Chay whines. Then worry creases his forehead. "Do you think he's angry at me? Oh God, what if he's angry with me and that's why he hung up! I'm going to call him!"

"You", Porsche says with determination as he steps to his baby brother and takes the phone away, "need to sit down and eat your dinner. And then study for that maths test I didn't forget you have next week."

"Hi~aaaah", Chay whines and makes grabby hands towards the phone. He gives Porsche his best puppy eyes, but fifteen years of this have imbued Porsche with at least some immunity.

"Dinner. Studying. Then you can call him again to say good night."

Chay pouts and grumbles, but he does sit down with Porsche to enjoy their three course meal of instant ramen, last evening's left overs and some chips Porsche pilfered from Hum bar.

"Are you going to call P'Kinn to say good night too?" Chay asks innocently around a mouthful of noodles. Porsche can feel his ears heat up.

"Of course not, we're not... that's not the kind of relationship we have."

Chay hums and swallows. The look he gives Porsche is sly.

"I bet P'Kinn would love to hear your voice before he goes to bed."

Porsche tries to stop the furious blush spreading from his ears over his cheeks down to his neck. "Eat your dinner, you little pest."

Porsche, obviously, does not call Kinn. That'd be ridiculous. The man is busy running a business. Multiple businesses. He doesn't have time to waste on inane calls with guys he had dinner with once (and breakfast, but Porsche does not think about that).

Kinn calls him. Porsche, who was in the middle of doing the dishes, almost drops his phone into the suds when he sees the caller ID.

"Hey", he says, feeling breathless all of a sudden.

"Hey", Kinn says and his voice sounds so soft and warm it makes Porsche feel all soft and warm in the head. "Am I interrupting something?"

"No!" Porsche says, way too hastily. He clears his throat and tries to sound less like his fifteen-years-old brother getting a call from his crush. Porsche doesn't have a crush. And most certainly not on someone he barely knows. "No, just cleaning up dinner."

Kinn hums. "What did you have?"

Is this happening? Does this man really want to chat with Porsche about his very uneventful evening and the even more boring dinner? Apparently so.

"Just whatever was in the house", he says evasively. He doubts that someone like Kinn knows what instant ramen or last night's leftovers taste like.

"I'm sure it was delicious", Kinn says, completely unfounded in his trust in Porsche's cooking abilities. "Maybe I can join you next time?"

"God no", Porsche says with a lot of panic and zero forethought. It gets quite on the other end of the line. "I just mean...", he starts and doesn't know how to convey the terror at the thought of serving his makeshift, cobbled together dinners to someone with Kinn's tastes.

"Look, Porsche", the other man says, his tone is a lot less warm and way more professional. "I don't mean to make you uncomfortable. I can lose your number."

"No!" Porsche almost shouts into the phone. There's silence, then a quiet laugh.

"No?" Kinn repeats and sounds very amused. Which is better, because at least he's no longer suggesting getting out of Porsche's life, and worse, because Porsche is very sure that the amusement is at his expense. "Why won't you have dinner with me then?"

Porsche is fighting the urge to hang up. This is mortifying. But it's either being brave or letting Kinn believe that he doesn't want to spend time with him. Presented like that, it’s not so difficult to make a choice.

"My cooking is not great", he explains. "I'm sure you're used to... better."

"I can't cook at all", Kinn says. That's because he has people who do it for him. And a lot better than what Porsche could manage, even if his resources weren't so limited. "Not even rice."

Porsche scoffs. "Now you're just trying to make me feel better."

Kinn laughs. "I am. But it's also true. I never tried. Though I am sure I could figure it out. With a manual. And video instructions. Surely there’s a tutorial somewhere."

"Stop", Porsche laughs. "You are playing it up now."

"Only a very little bit", Kinn says kindly. "We could solve our cooking problem if you'd just let me take you out to dinner.”

"Damn, that was smooth", Porsche laughs and leans against the sink, phone cradled against his ear and dirty dishes all but forgotten.

"I do try. Thank you for noticing."

It's a good thing Porsche can't see himself right now or he might be embarrassed by the besotted smile on his face. "Dinner sounds lovely", he says quietly, feeling shy about admitting it out loud. To Kinn.

There's a pleased hum on the other end of the line. "I'll pick you up at seven."

Porsche's heart falls. "I can't tomorrow", he says and is genuinely upset about it. "Chay has this big test coming up. I have to be here and make sure he prepares for it."

Kinn goes quiet for a moment and Porsche is certain that he has pushed it too far now. Surely there are dozens of people whose lives are less complicated. Who can meet up for dinner with him at the drop of a hat and make time for him. Who fit into his elegant lifestyle of bespoke suits and fancy restaurants far better than Porsche does with his scuffed up trainers and cobbled together dinners.

"What's the test in?" Kinn asks.

"Maths", Porsche answers, taken aback and not sure why this matters.

"I'm pretty good with numbers", Kinn says.

"Of course you are", Porsche retorts and can't help rolling his eyes. He's fond though.

"I could help Porchay with the bits he's having trouble with."

"You want to help my baby brother study for his maths test?" The disbelief must be very evident in his voice because Kinn chuckles.

"Porchay's a cute kid. But more importantly, I want to see you."

Now, that makes Porsche feel warm not just in the face but all over.

And because Kinn is so open about his interest, it emboldens him to be a little more honest as well. "I want to see you too."

"Tomorrow then. I'll bring food."

"Thank you. Also, since Chay is here...", Porsche doesn't know how to ask this. It's not Kinn's job to feed his little brother, but...

"Porsche", Kinn says, sounding stern for the first time. "I wouldn't come to your home and then not bring enough food to feed your brother as well."

"Ah, okay", Porsche mumbles and feels at once chastised and giddy.

Once again, Kinn brings enough food to feed him, Chay and ten additional people that do not live in Porsche’s household. They will have left-overs for days. Fancy leftovers even. Porsche texts Jom and Tem to come over tomorrow to share the spoils. Kinn can’t know how much this means to Porsche, but Porsche is determined to show him later.

For now, he gets out the good china, meaning: the plates and cups that are the least chipped, while Kinn pours over equations with Chay. Porsche hasn't been able to help his brother with maths ever since they replaced the numbers with letters. He has no idea how to subtract a B from an A and between two jobs, debt collectors and trying to keep his baby brother in school, fed and housed, he has absolutely no time or capacity to learn. You don't need fancy maths to pour drinks and flirt more generous tips out of people.

"Did you understand that?" Kinn asks as he puts his pen down after scribbling half a page's worth of equations. Porsche catches Chay shoot him a devastated glance, clearly lost, but too intimidated to tell Kinn so.

"Uh huh", his little brother says in the same tone he used when Porsche asked if the class trip to the expensive amusement park had really been cancelled.

It hurt far worse than any debt collector's fist ever had but after the concert, there was absolutely no extra money left.

“Great”, Kinn exclaims, completely oblivious to Chay’s peril. “See, it’s easy once you get the hang of it.”

“Totally. Is it time for dinner yet?” his little brother asks and shoots beseeching glances towards him. Porsche sighs but then takes mercy on him.

“Sure. Go wash your hands.”

Before Chay can do that, his phone lights up. With an eye-searing array of emojis and one of Wik’s more popular tunes that Porsche is absolutely sick of by this point. Not because it’s a bad song, but because he was forced to listen to it for months.

Every day.

All day.

“P’Kim!” Chay squeals, hitting a register that is more comfortable for dogs than humans. He takes the call and is out of his chair and up the stairs before Porsche can even think about reminding him that they have a guest.

Porsche sighs, then he shoots a rueful smile towards Kinn. “Sorry about that.”

The other man seems wholly amused. “Don’t be. He’s got his priorities straight. I am well aware that I cannot compete with Wik.”

“Honestly, most days, neither can I.”

Kinn shakes his head, his eyes are creased with fondness. “Don’t say that. Your little brother loves you.”

“I know”, Porsche admits and acts like it’s nothing when actually, having it acknowledged by an external party means the world. He pulls himself out of it and back to the lovely dinner Kinn brought. “We can still enjoy this”, he says and pulls Kinn’s plate towards him to pile food onto it. Only once he’s pushing it back towards him does he notice the odd look the other man is shooting him.

“What?” Porsche wants to know, suddenly self-conscious.

Kinn shakes his head and then the smile is back on his face. “Nothing. Thank you. Enjoy your meal.”

Dinner is lovely and, Porsche has to admit it, more intimate without his little brother sitting there.

“We should do this again”, he says as he’s putting the leftovers away.

“I can come by the day after tomorrow”, Kinn suggests.

“No. Yes. I meant, just us.”

“Oh?” Kinn sounds amused. Porsche can hear the scraping of a chair being pushed back and then there’s Kinn’s warmth in his back, effectively trapping him against the fridge. Not that Porsche minds. “And what are we doing that is not fit for the eyes of a younger brother?” Kinn’s breath ghosts across his neck, making Porsche shiver and draw up his shoulders instinctively.

There’s a hand against his throat, broad and gentle, tipping him back until his head is resting against Kinn’s shoulder, then lips pressing butterfly kisses into the side of his temple. The position makes him vulnerable, his throat bared and Kinn’s hand lightly resting against it, but his trust in the other man is absolute. And so Porsche feels held rather than threatened.

“Maybe more of this”, Porsche suggests as he turns his head to nose along the tendons of Kinn’s neck, taking a deep breath of his cologne and warm skin. He smells so good, it makes Porsche a little stupid.

Kinn makes a noise like he’s been hurt and then there are hands on Porsche’s hips, turning him around so Kinn can kiss him properly, crowding him against the fridge.

Porsche is immediately on board with all of it, with Kinn’s mouth over his, kissing the breath right out of him, with Kinn’s body pressed into his, grounding and secure. He wraps his arms around the other man’s neck to draw him in closer, closer still.

Kinn’s hands are all over his body, grabbing at his arms, his back, his torso.

The pain that shoots through Porsche’s side makes him gasps and recoil on instinct. Kinn freezes, fingers drawing back from where they’d been pressed against Porsche’s ribcage.

Kinn stops kissing him to give him a concerned once-over. “You’re hurt”, he says.

“It’s nothing”, Porsche tries to salvage what is left of the mood. “Just don’t touch my ribs. Now, get back here.” He pulls at Kinn’s shoulders to come closer again, please, but Kinn doesn’t budge and without his cooperation, it’s more like pulling on a mountain than a man. He grabs the hem of Porsche’s shirt and yanks it up, his dark eyes trailing over Porsche’s side, where the bruises are fading into shades of blue and sickly yellow

“What happened?” Kinn asks and Porsche squirms, embarrassed. He grapples with Kinn’s hand to pull his t-shirt back down.

“Nothing. It’s nothing. Kiss me again?”

“Porsche.”

Porsche looks at him, silently begging him to let it go. It’s bad enough that Kinn knows about the broken lock and gate, about their old, ratty furniture that he looks so out of place on, the debt. He does not need to know anything more about the shit-show that Porsche’s life has turned into.

“I fell”, Porsche lies.
“Right”, Kinn says dryly. He lets go of Porsche’s shirt but his fingers are still hovering close to his ribs.

“What, that happens. People fall.”

“Uh huh. Old people. Not twenty-one-year old guys who are mostly muscle.” He pokes him in the stomach. Hard. Porsche squirms and pushes his hand away. They stare at each other, Kinn clearly excepting an explanation and Porsche completely unwilling to provide one.

Eventually, the other man lets out a deep sigh. “Fine”, he says, “keep your secrets. For now.” Porsche makes an outraged little noise. For now. The nerve of this guy! “Have you seen a doctor about this?”

Porsche probably should have bitten back the joyless snort that leaves him at that and lied. As if he’s going to waste money on a doctor to tell him to take it easy (something that is not possible in Porsche’s life anyway) and get rest (equally unlikely). Porsche does not have the luxury of recuperating on his sofa and not take fights for several weeks until his body deems itself healed. The bills don’t take several weeks off and neither do the loan sharks.

Kinn’s dark eyes are boring into him, then he gets out his phone and types something on it. “Someone will pick you up tomorrow around noon.”

“Kinn, no.”
“Does the morning work better for you?”

“No.”

“Afternoon then.”

“Kinn”, Porsche reaches out to place his hand over the screen of Kinn’s sleek new phone. “I’m fine.”

“You’re hurt”, the other man points out, “and you haven’t been to a professional to get this looked at. I am trying to fix that.”

“I don’t want you to fix anything. I just want you to spend time with me. Okay?”

Kinn’s face does something complicated at that, then it goes slack and soft. He takes a step back into Porsche’s personal space, which is a good start! His forehead bumps into Porsche’s.

“Just this once, alright?”

Porsche huffs. “You drive a hard bargain.” Kinn hums and brushes his nose over Porsche’s at which Porsche’s insides go all fluttery and soft. “Okay”, he relents. “Just this once.”

Kinn draws back, though barely. Just enough to look at him. “Promise me. I won’t be able to pick you up myself tomorrow. Promise me you’ll get into the car and go see the doctor.”

“Yes, Mother”, Porsche agrees with a bit of an eye-roll. Kinn pulls at face. “Father?”
“God no!”

Porsche cackles. “No? You don’t want to be my dad. My daddy?”

Kinn flicks him on the forehead. “You are such a brat.”

Porsche does not argue and instead sticks his tongue out at him. He does not get to find out what Kinn was going to do next because his phone lights up and Kinn’s face goes withdrawn and pinched. He turns away from Porsche and takes the call.

“Make it quick”, he barks, harsh in a way Porsche has never heard him before. Whoever is at the other line takes those words to heart because the entire calls lasts twenty seconds or less. When he turns back to him, Kinn looks frustrated. “I need to handle this personally. I’m sorry, but I’ve got to go.”

Porsche doesn’t even try to hide his disappointment. “Your work really does not let you rest, huh.”

“No rest for the wicked”, Kinn jokes and then goes stiff all over. Porsche rolls his eyes at him.

“Yeah, you’re real wicked. With your food and your doctor’s appointments. The evilest.”

The other man visibly relaxes at that.

Porsche accompanies him all the way to the gate. It takes them a lot longer than such a short distance should.

“Remember, you promised. Go to the doctor’s tomorrow.”

Porsche huffs. “Yes, daddy. Will do, daddy. Now go, daddy.”

Kinn takes his face between his hands and pinches both his cheeks. It hurts a little, but Porsche is smiling too hard to care.

“You are such a menace.”

“And yet, you like me. What does that say about your taste in men?”

Kinn looks at him overly serious. “I will let you know that I have great taste in men.” Porsche feels his cheeks heat up and not only because Kinn is still pinching them. He shoves him out of the gate and towards the fancy back car that is parked outside.

“Leave! Take care of your work emergency. Someone will have to pay the doctor tomorrow and we both know it won’t be me.”

Chapter Text

The next day, Porsche gets into the sleek, black car waiting outside for him. Just like he promised. Inside, there’s a sourly looking guy with a pony-tail.

“Hi”, Porsche greets him with a smile. “I’m Porsche.”

The man grunts and pulls them out of Porsche’s driveway. Not a big talker then.

“What’s your name?” Porsche still asks.

“Big”, Big mutters and that’s the end of their conversation for the duration of the ride.

At the hospital, Porsche goes up to the reception, unsure what to say. Big trails after him like an ill-tempered shadow.

“I think I have an appointment here”, Porsche says. The nurse behind the counter gives him an odd look.

“You think?”

“Right. Eh, someone else arranged it for me, so… it’s about my ribs. They are -“

“Name?” the woman interrupts him, looking at her screen.

“Porsche.”

“We’re not expecting any Porsches today.”

“Oh. Maybe it’s under Kinn.”

“No one under that name either. Now, if you’d like to make an appointment, I can pencil you in in four weeks.”

“Four weeks?” Porsche echoes. His ribs will have healed on their own by then. “No, thank you. That won’t be necessary. I’ll, uhm, just go then.”

Before he can turn away, Big steps up to the counter with the most put-upon frown on his face. He shoots Porsche a look like he considers him the biggest nuisance, then he mutters: “Theerapanyakun. It’s under Theerapanyakun.”

Right, stupid. He should have said Kinn’s family name.

The nurse types it in and then sits up straighter. “Oh”, she says and then looks up at Porsche with a smile that he recognises from his own work. It’s the customer service smile he gives annoying but well-paying assholes. “I had no idea. Right this way.”

She gets up and leaves the reception, making all the people waiting in line behind Porsche glare at him.

“Follow her”, Big says with the most exhausted groan as he gives Porsche’s shoulder a shove. Porsche feels like he’s an obstinate toddler and Big has just been put in charge of him against his wishes. Big probably feels that way too.

He is led away from the main reception area and right into one of the corridors. The nurse takes them straight to a room, knocks and then disappears inside. Porsche hears Kinn’s family name again before the door closes.

His ass has barely touched the chair when it swings open again and a doctor only a couple of years older than him walks out.

“What mess did you get yourself into n- oh.” She stops in front of Porsche, who hastily gets up and gives her a polite wai. “You’re not Kinn.”

“I am … not”, he agrees, unsure what that means for him. Will he be sent away again. Honestly, at this point, all of this does not feel worth it. He’ll just go home and let his body do its thing, like it usually does.

“But Kinn sent you?”

“He said he’d make an appointment for me”, Porsche agrees.

The doctor hums and then gives him a quick once-over. “So, where have you been shot?”

“Shot?!” Porsche repeats, his voice rising a little. “I am here about my ribs.”They look at each other, both obviously confused. The doctor recovers first and then holds her door open. “Why don’t you come inside and then we can take it from the top.”

Porsche does. Big stays outside, positioning himself right in front of the door. The doctor does not seem weirded out by that in the slightest.

“What’s your name?”

“Porsche. Kinn said you’d know I’d be coming?”

“You’d think that, wouldn’t you, if he sends his new hires to me. But alas, here we are.”

“I don’t work for Kinn”, he clarifies.

“You don’t?” Porsche shakes his head. “Then, if you don’t mind me asking, what is your relationship with Kinn?”

“I… we… uhm”, before he can stutter himself through some type of explanation, she takes mercy on him.

“It’s fine, none of my business. You mentioned your ribs. What’s wrong with them?”

Porsche pulls his shirt over his head and turns his bad side towards her. “I fell”, he says before she can ask any more questions. The look she gives him says it all, but she does not call him out on it. Instead, she gets her stethoscope and some gloves.

Fifteen minutes later, Porsche’s torso is properly bandaged and, as he expected, he’s given some painkillers. Along with the (useless) instruction to take it easy and not strain himself. He’s still polite and thanks her.

“Hey Porsche”, the doctor calls him back before he can leave, “was Kinn involved in your ribs – in you falling?”

Porsche frowns at her. “I didn’t even know Kinn when I was scheduled to… fall.”

She seems relieved to hear that. “Well, if you ever fall again, come see me. And be careful.”

He pats his bandaged up side. “Will be, doc, thanks.”

“That is not what I meant. But you’re welcome.”

Just as Porsche is about to reach for the handle, the door swings open on it’s own.

“Kinn!” he would be embarrassed about how excited he sounds but Kinn’s smile is just as bright as his. “I thought you didn’t have time today.”

“I told them to hurry up. How are you?”

“Good, I’m good. The nice doc patched me up, I am all back to normal now.”

“No, you’re not, you still need to take it slow”, the doctor interjects. “Very slow”, she says and her eyes are trained on Kinn, who just gives her a wide smile.

“What’s the diagnosis?” he wants to know.

“The diagnosis is that I do not discuss my patients with third parties. If Porsche wants to tell you, ask him.”

“P’Mai”, Kinn says, beseechingly.

“N’Kinn”, the doc replies dryly, “now, unless you are bleeding out, please take your boy and leave my office. I have some catching up to do, since someone scheduled an extra appointment for me today.”

Porsche should probably protest being called Kinn’s boy. It is a little insulting. But he’s just happy to see him and his ribs do feel better, thanks to the doc, so he decides not to be bothered about it.

Outside, Kinn wraps his arm around his middle and steers him towards one of those nondescript black cars that despite their best efforts stick out like a sore thumb. It’s probably not the one Porsche came in since Big does not get in with them.

“Well done”, Kinn says once they are inside and the praise makes something hot and wiggly bloom in Porsche’s chest. “Let me take you to lunch.” Porsche, never one to turn down free food, specially not the kind that is probably served at wherever Kinn goes to lunch, immediately agrees.

“I’ve got to be home by four when Chay gets out of school, though”, Porsche says and Kinn nods agreeable. “Also, I am not allowed to drink alcohol with these”, he shakes the little pill bottle the doc gave him. “But you can buy me a bubble tea.”

Kinn looks at him, unreadable for a moment. Then he takes Porsche's face between both hands and squishes it. “God, you need to stop being so adorable, it is not good for my blood sugar.”

Porsche grins through being squished. He feels light and happy.

~°~°~°~

His little brother bustles through the door, Kim in tow. Chay is carrying a quiet frankly massive guitar case and cradles it like his first born. Porsche might object to Kim treating his little brother like a packing mule, but knowing Chay, he probably wrestled it from him.

Porsche is not sure when it became an every day occurrence to have an up-and-coming idol in his home, but somehow, Chay has managed to pull it off.

Ever since their disastrous start, Porsche's baby brother has tried his utmost best to play perfect host and given the frequency with which Kim can be found here, he's apparently doing a great job.

"Hia, look!" Chay says and holds up the guitar case while beaming from ear to ear. "I have a new guitar. A proper one. P'Kim said it's going to compliment my voice."

"Wait", Porsche says, "this is yours?"

Chay's smile instantly falls. "Hia, pleeeeeease!"

"Chay", is all Porsche says, in that tone of voice that means he's not going to be swayed. Porsche has no idea what these things cost, but he is pretty damn sure it's more than they could afford. He doesn't want his little brother accepting expensive gifts from people they do not know all that well. Those things have the potential to turn incredibly ugly incredibly fast. When their parents died, protecting Chay from the world's ugliness became Porsche's job and he's taking it very seriously.

Kim is looking back and forth between them before taking a step towards Porsche. "It's not new", he says, "really, it’s one of the guitars I barely use anyway. It's just collecting dust in my apartment and Chay needs a proper instrument to learn on."

As if Porsche doesn’t know that. Chay is still using his childhood guitar, which is rapidly becoming too small for his ever extending arms. But the thing is, there is no guitar buying money left in the budget this month. Much like there was no guitar buying money left in the budget last month and there probably won't be any next month either.

Porsche would love to get his baby brother a new guitar. Along with everything else that could ever strike his fancy. But that's just not their life.

This whole situation reminds Porsche of those assholes on the market who would shove treats and useless, flashing trinkets into a much younger Chay's pudgy little hands, making him cry when more important, but less fun expenses like food and clothes forced Porsche to take them away again. They taught Chay that, despite Porsche's best efforts, his big brother could not give him everything he wanted.

He gives Kim a long, hard look, assessing whether he can trust this boy with his precious baby brother.

Kim meets his gaze unblinkingly.

"It's really a used guitar?"

"So used", Kim says. "Practically ancient. All scratched up too."

"And you really, really do not want it any more?" He knows that this one will hurt if he has to make Chay give it back.

"Never want to see it in my apartment again."

Porsche takes a deep breath. For his own peace of mind, he vows not to sneak into Chay’s room later to look at the model and then search online how much that thing cost. "Okay, fine."

Chay let's out the most high pitched little squeal and then throws both arms around the idol, almost crushing Kim in his enthusiasm. The other boy looks shell shocked for a moment before an almost wounded smile plays over his lips. He gently pads Chay on the back.

~°~°~°~

It’s another early breakfast. Porsche should be a lot more grumpy, he thinks. He’s running on only five hours of sleep after all. But seeing Kinn stand in front of their slide-doors makes him so happy, all tiredness is forgotten. He’ll just drink an extra energy shot or ten at work.

Kinn didn’t just bring breakfast, he also brought a coffee machine. It’s huge, chrome and gleaming and would look more at home in a spaceship than in Porsche’s ratty old kitchen. It single-handedly doubles the worth of all the furniture in the room.

Porsche watches with interest as Kinn sets it up.

“I had no idea you were this dedicated to caffeine”, Porsche teases, “how did you mange the last time?”

“Good company and perseverance”, Kinn says and presses a button. The machine sputters to life with a lot of noise. It sounds a little like it’s dying but judging from Kinn’s completely relaxed expression, this is what is supposed to happen. “Coffee?” he offers, like this is not Porsche’s kitchen and he’s not a guest in it.

Porsche pulls a face. “No thank you.”

“You don’t like coffee?”

“Why would anyone? It’s so bitter.”

Kinn smiles. “Only a fan of sweet things, huh? Fitting.”

Heat spreads in Porsche’s chest and he leans against Kinn’s side as he watches him make the machine work its magic. Kinn is solid and warm, pressed against Porsche from shoulder so hip. He likes that he can put most of his weight on him and Kinn barely sways.

The other man is busy making his drug of choice and Porsche tries to commit the steps to memory. Next time Kinn is here, Porsche wants to be the one to offer coffee to him. Like a good host. And also because he can do so little for Kinn while Kinn is helping so much. It makes Porsche feel some type of way but he’d be insane to turn it down. Also, he just makes stuff easier and it’s so nice to have this one easy, constant, stable thing in his life that’s only comfort and joy and no pain.

Porsche looks at him and with a jolt realises that he’s fallen in love. Just like that. Within the blink of an eye, given how new everything still is between them. When did that happen? Was it when Kinn lit his cigarette against Porsche’s? When he took him to a fancy restaurant? When he laughed at his jokes? When he reached across the bar and called him adorable?

It was probably all of those.

Kinn catches him staring and lifts one of his impressive eyebrows at him. “And what were you thinking about just now, hm?” he teases.

Normally, Porsche would get a little embarrassed about being found out like this but he’s still shell shocked by his latest realisation. So he defaults to honesty. “You.”

“Oh?” the second eyebrow goes up. “Only good things, I hope.” He turns away from the coffee machine to put his hands on Porsche’s hips, draw him in. Porsche sways into him and it feels as natural as breathing.

“Yeah”, he admits quietly. Kinn must pick up on his overwhelmed feelings because his eyes go soft and he rubs his nose against Porsche’s forehead, pressing a kiss and then two against his temple.

“I’m glad to hear that”, he whispers in the minimal space between them. “Because I am constantly thinking about you too.”

“Even when I am right there?”

“When you’re right there. When you’re half a city away. When I come home at night and it’s too late to come here and wake you up.”

“Wake me up”, Porsche says immediately, no matter how impractical that might actually be.

Kinn draws back a little so he can better look at him and laughs, his eyes creasing at the corners with happiness. “No. But I might be persuaded to spend a night.”

Porsche thinks about Kinn in his fancy suits and probably equally fancy pyjamas in Porsche’s creaky bed that has been the same ever since he turned fifteen. He should be embarrassed. But Kinn is not. He seems so comfortable amongst Porsche’s lack of luxury.

~°~°~°~

Kim’s car is outside and Chay’s running around their house like a headless chicken. Porsche is standing at the door, his little brother’s backpack in hand and getting antsy just watching him. Or maybe the shivers crawling up and down his neck have something to do with Kinn standing in his kitchen, cup of coffee in hand, already in a suit at ten thirty in the morning and looking at Porsche like he’s never seen anything he’d like to have more. It’s heady, being wanted like this. It’s also highly distracting.

His official explanation as to why he is here so early is that he was just accompanying his little brother. How that translates into standing in Porsche’s kitchen, looking ready to grow roots here remains Kinn’s secret. Porsche could probably ask him to leave but… they both know he’s not going to do that.

“How do I look?” Chay says, hair ruffled from how often he’s pulled a new shirt over his head by now.

“It’s fine, Chay. Come on, he’s waiting. You look cute…”, Porsche bites his tongue but it’s already too late. The bad word is out.

“I don’t want to look cute!” Secretly, Porsche thinks that that is a doomed effort, given the baby face and floppy hair. “I need to look good!” Chay’s stomping back up the stairs.

“Porchay, I promise Kim won’t care about your t-shirt”, Kinn shouts after him but his only answer is a door slamming shut. They share a look, Kinn amused, Porsche exhausted. It’s been a long night last night and this is a lot before breakfast.

Chay finally emerges in a baby blue button down that Porsche is pretty sure was amongst the first outfits he tried and dismissed as too childish, but he knows better than to utter a word about that.

“Is this better?” Chay asks as he’s undoing about three buttons too many for Porsche’s liking.

“Very handsome”, he says with so much earnestness it almost tilts back into sarcasm.

“That’s a very nice shirt”, Kinn helps out and Chay gives a shy little smile.

“Okay”, he says, taking his backpack from Porsche, who steps up to fix his hair and, while he’s at it, close two of the buttons. He can’t do anything about it if Chay decides to undo them once he’s out of sight, but he’ll feel better knowing his little brother did not leave with half his chest exposed.

“Do you have your phone?”

“Yes, hia.”

“Is it charged?”

“Yes, hia.”

“If anything happens, anything at all, you call me.”

“Of course, hia.”

“You’re back at nine, not a minute later or this was the last festival you went to until you’re eighteen, got it?”

Chay looks appropriately intimidated and nods. “Good”, Porsche pulls him for a hug and almost doesn’t let go. His baby. In a crowd of strangers. And he won’t be there to make sure nobody pushes him or spills their drink on him or worse, offers a drink to him. The only thing that reassures him a little bit is the knowledge that Kim won’t leave his side. Over the last few weeks, he’s proved himself to take pretty good care of Chay. Nobody will ever care as much as Porsche does, obviously. But Kim’s a not too shoddy second. “Love you.”

Chay beams up at him, vibrating with excitement. “Love you too, hia!” And then he’s out of the house, running towards the car. Porsche watches Kim get out to open the door for him. He spots Porsche and waves before climbing back inside.

Once they’ve vanished from sight, Porsche lets out the biggest breath and slides down the wall, just sitting on the floor and recuperating for a second. Somewhere to his right, he can hear Kinn chuckle. Then there’s a warm hand on his shoulder and a cup of coffee appearing in his line of vision. Porsche looks up and Kinn nods at him encouragingly before he sits down next to Porsche. On their dirty kitchen floor. In his fancy suit. Porsche has the urge to go get the vacuum and the mop but it’s already too late and he’s too drained anyway.

“You look like you need it more than me.”

“Thanks, you wanna have him?”

Kinn laughs. “As cute as your little brother is, I’m pretty sure Kim would stage a riot. Besides”, his smile turns smaller and somewhat more private. “I’d rather have you.”

Porsche takes a sip of Kinn’s lukewarm coffee, pulls a face at the bitter taste and then sniffs haughtily at the other man. “You can’t afford me.”

His guest looks thoroughly amused by now. “You sure about that? My pockets are deep.”

“Must be nice”, Porsche grumbles.

“It is. It means I can afford a lot of pretty things.” From the way he looks at him, it doesn’t take a genius to know what he is thinking of right now. Porsche can feel the blush creeping from his cheeks all the way down to his collar bone.

“And if you had me? What would you do with me?”

“Everything”, Kinn hisses, his eyes impossibly deep, his smile a little sharper around the edges. He’s so close Porsche can feel the heat rolling off of him. “Twice.”

Chapter Text

It’s a slow night. True to his word, Kinn did call him even though it was technically too late and now he’s here, kissing Porsche goodnight and just making sure they see each other at least once throughout the day.

It’s sweet and wonderful and hugging Kinn feels like Porsche is recharging. There’s just… a thought he has not been able to get rid off.

“You’re here a lot”, Porsche observes as he’s bringing popcorn over to the couch. Kinn is already out of his suit jacket and he looks perfectly comfortable.

“I like your home. It contains you”, he says with a wink, the incorrigible flirt. Porsche sits down next to him, closer than strictly necessary. Not that Kinn complaints. He puts his arm around Porsche and pulls him in before he snags a handful of popcorn.

“I like having you here”, Porsche agrees and he does, but… “I just thought… we don’t have to meet here all the time.”

“Oh?” Kinn’s smile is bright and he seems elated. “You want to go somewhere else? Let me take you to a nice spa maybe? You’ll like it.”

Porsche wouldn’t know about nice spas but they are probably, well, nice. Also, not what he meant.

“I mean, sure. That sounds fun. But I was talking about… your home?”

Kinn goes quiet and the arm around Porsche tenses.

“That’s not a good idea”, he says eventually. “My home’s… not a good place for you to be. Trust me, you’re not missing much.”

It’s difficult to hide his disappointment. The sad thing is that Porsche was already kind of expecting an answer like this. Surely there’s a reason they always meet here. Surely there’s a reason Kinn always comes to him while never inviting Porsche over to his place.

It’s hard not to jump to the obvious conclusion, namely, that there is someone at Kinn’s home who should not meet Porsche. Because Porsche… is the side piece.

That thought should not be all that surprising. A man like Kinn, it would be weird if he did not have someone at home. Porsche tries to soothe himself with the thought that maybe it was an arranged marriage with a woman from an equally powerful background and Kinn’s proclivities towards men were not taken into account. That wouldn’t be too far fetched. And it would still mean that his feelings towards Porsche are genuine.

Porsche desperately wants to believe that.

He also knows that it’s a little naive to hope so. The much more likely scenario is that Kinn is just having fun with him while it lasts and then he will drop Porsche for the next affair.

Kinn pulls him in and kisses him on the forehead. “Don’t think about it any more.”

It’s impossible not to.

~°~°~°~

Porsche is playing dead on his couch with last night’s dinner and some inane singing competition in the background while he’s trying to find the strength for yet another fight. His ribs are wrapped up and the painkiller hasn’t fully worn off. So physically, he’s okay. It’s just, it’s been so nice not to hurt when breathing in too deeply. Or making an ill advised move. Porsche is not looking forward to giving that up. Again.

But Chay’s tuition is just around the corner and his uniform shirts have become dangerously tight across his shoulders. Porsche knows his brother would never say anything, but he does not want him to be singled out and mocked.

Remembering that, it’s easier to hype himself up for tonight’s fight. If he does a good enough job, that’s half the tuition in one go.

There is a commotion outside on the street. At first, Porsche does not pay it any attention, but when the noise is not moving on and seems to stop right outside his gate, he does heave himself off the couch and goes to check it out.

There are two large vans parked outside his house. The writing on them announces a locksmith and a metal working business. Odd.

Porsche slides the door open and steps outside. When one of the workers starts fiddling with Porsche’s gate, he picks up his pace.

“Hey, what are you doing? Stop that!” Yes, the gate might be broken and the lock not functioning any more, but having some sort of barrier there, even if it’s just a visual one, is still better than having none.

The worker gives him a quick once over. “And you are?”

“The guy who owns the gate you’re currently messing with”, Porsche says, slightly pissed off now. “And I just told you to stop.”

The other man shoots him a strange lock. “Dude, you called to have this fixed. Why are you being weird about this now?”

“I assure you, I did no such thing. Now back off and whatever you have already done, I am not paying for it.”

That gets him a reaction. The man squares up. He’s shorter than Porsche, most people are, but wider and he’s holding a wrench. “Now listen here, you weird little asshole”, he takes one step into Porsche’s personal space.

“Leave him alone”, a melodic voice says.

“Kim? What are you doing here?”

His brother’s little crush steps out between the vans, looking like he just came from a photo shoot in his tight leather pants and the styled hair. Heck, was does Porsche know about a celebrity’s schedule, maybe he did.

“We’re fixing the gate, obviously”, Kim says and gives Porsche a look like he thinks he’s a little slow but is too polite to voice this out loud.

“Come again?”

“Your gate”, Kim repeats, enunciating his words now, “it’s broken. We’re making it un-broken.”

Porsche gives him an annoyed glare. “Can we talk? In private?”

Kim shrugs, but follows him into the house.

“So let me get this right, you called someone to fix my gate.”

“Duh”, Kim says like that should be obvious and he is such a little shit, Porsche wants to strangle him.

“Why?”

The boy looks at him like he does not understand the question. “Because it’s broken?” His tone makes is very obvious that he considers this the stupidest conversation he has had to endure in a while. Porsche suspects that he is only putting up with it and Porsche because Porsche happens to be his little friend’s older brother.

“It’s my gate. My house. My responsibility.”

“Well, Chay lives here too and I think Chay deserves a fixed gate that will give whomever wants to come in here half a second of pause.”

Porsche glares at him.

This.

Little.

Shit.

Is insinuating Porsche isn’t creating a safe environment for his baby brother when that is the only thing Porsche is doing every day all day.

“Out”, he growls between clenched teeth.

“You just told me to come in here with you.”

Porsche grabs him by the arm and Kim goes stiff all over for a second, one of his hands coming up towards Porsche’s throat, but he drops it and then lets himself be manhandled outside. “And take your work crew with you, I don’t want them on my property!”

Kim huffs and puffs but Porsche pays him no mind. This boy!

~°~°~°~

Later, when Porsche is at his night job, Kinn comes into the bar. He looks elegant and out of place, as always, though there is a little bit of tension around his eyes.

“Rough day?” Porsche smiles and pushes one of his special drinks in his direction. Kinn takes a seat at the bar and then a sip of his drink.

“This is good”, he says and Porsche preens. “I heard Kim came by earlier today.”

“Ah”, Porsche hums and busies himself wiping the counter. “Did he complain about me to you?”

“No, nothing like that. He did complain though.”

Porsche sighs and then puts down his towel. “Okay, look, I know he’s your little brother and maybe I could have been a bit nicer about it, but he was overstepping.”

Kinn watches him, then frowns. “Wait, are you expecting me to scold you about being mean to my little brother?”

Porsche squares up and tries to shield himself from any critique. He is not sorry about telling Kim no. But he of all people knows how tricky younger brothers can be. “Well, if you are, I will apologise for my delivery, not the message itself.”

Kinn stares. “I’m not mad at you.”

“Oh”, Porsche lets go a little of the breath he was holding. “You’re not?”

“No! Why would I be mad at you?”

“Because you feel protective over your little brother. Obviously.”

Kinn gives that more thought than he really should. Finally, he nods. “I suppose I do feel protective. But I never considered you a threat.”

“Well, good. I’m not. Wait, why do you still look so tense then?”

Kinn takes another sip. Another. It takes Porsche a moment to realise that the other man is stalling. What for though?

“I wanted to come talk to you because Kim is not wrong, you know? Your security is severely lacking. Your windows - “

“What is wrong with my windows now?” Porsche interrupts him, feeling snappy and put on the spot. Not Kinn too! Doesn’t he know that Porsche would love to turn their home, Chay’s home, into Fort Knox if he could afford to? He hates this.

“They are easy to see through.”

“They are windows.”

“From the outside, Porsche. You don’t even cover them at night. When you’ve got the lights on in there, everybody can see everything you and Chay are doing. Where you are, where you are going, whether you are armed or not.”

Porsche feels a twinge of embarrassment. Not that he is really doing anything embarrassing in the kitchen and living room but he might have, oh, Porsche doesn’t know, scratched his ass or picked up something off the floor and then put it in his mouth. Porsche never considered anyone standing outside and watching. It feels creepy. And invasive.

“Why would anyone watch us? We’re not that interesting.”

Kinn’s eyes go a little softer. “You vastly underestimate yourself. As always.” Then he sits up a straight. “But that is not the point. The point is that your home is not safe. And Kim cannot-“

“Oh”, Porsche breathes as it finally dawns on him, “it’s about Kim’s safety.”

“What?”

“He’s spending more time at my place. Since he and Chay, well, they’re becoming fast friends. And you’re worried about your idol brother being attacked by some unruly fan. That’s it, right? That’s why you are so concerned about the security at my place all of a sudden.”

Kinn just stares at him. Then he slowly nods his head. “Right”, he says. “This is about Kim. It’s always been about Kim. Because Kim cannot handle himself.”

“Oh, give him some credit”, Porsche laughs. “I think he’s doing just fine. For an idol. I mean, his job is to sing and to look pretty. And sell ridiculously overpriced skin care. Doesn’t he have people who can do the fighting for him?”

“He has bodyguards, of course”, Kinn agrees, “I would still feel so much better if Kim had better security while staying at yours.” He leans in as if he’s about to tell Porsche a secret, his gaze earnest and imploring. “It’s just, little brothers, you understand, right?”

Porsche goes all soft and mellow inside and the smile he shoots Kinn reflects as much. “Of course I understand. Do whatever you think needs doing to make Kim’s stay at ours safer.”

“Whatever I deem necessary?”

Porsche considers that. Then he considers the look on Kinn’s face. “Well, I am drawing the line at any moats.”

That startles a laugh out of the other man. “No moats”, he agrees and then taps his glass. “Fill me up?”

“Always.”

“And join me.” It’s not a question. And Porsche would love to fulfil that demand, but alas, he’s got a fight to be at tonight and he only made the mistake of fighting tipsy once. Not a good time for him or his opponent, though the crowd loved the throwing up after he got punched in the stomach a couple of times. All very dramatic. Also disgusting.

“I’d love to. But I can’t tonight.”

“Oh?” Kinn’s eyebrows go up. “Hot date?”

Porsche looks him straight in the eyes. “You’re already sitting here”, he says with a confidence he might not usually feel, but Kinn is so blatant with his advances that it in turn emboldens Porsche.

Kinn seems delighted to be flirted with. “Then you are staying sober for me? Anything in particular you want to remember about tonight?”

Porsche can feel his face heat up. “I am sure you’d be impossible to forget.” Kinn hums in agreement. “But not tonight.”

“Crestfallen. This is me looking utterly crestfallen”, Kinn says with way too much mirth. “The least you can do is give me a kiss.”

“You are terrible for business, you know that?” Porsche chides. He cannot be seen making out with one patron, it will ruin his tips from everybody else. But the thing it, he does want to kiss Kinn. Very much. So he leans over the counter and presses his lips against Kinn’s. He’ll consider it a kiss for good luck. It tingles warm and pleasant against his lips.

An hour later, Kinn is nursing his third drink and Porsche needs to get going. He wipes down his section and then hands the rest of the shift over to his colleague.

“Let me drop you off”, Kinn says and gets up from his chair when Porsche rounds the bar. Porsche thinks about him at the fight. Tipsy, soft, warm Kinn with his sweet smiles, protective of his baby brother and so accommodating to Porsche. Amongst a rowdy crowd that is gunning for blood and easy money.

Absolutely not!

“That is not a good idea”, Porsche says kindly and tries to urge him back into his seat. “Also, you should finish your drink. I made it specifically for you. Don’t waste good alcohol.”

“This is not good alcohol”, Kinn points out and… well, touché. Also, not the point.

“I still made it for you, so you should appreciate it.”

That Kinn does consider. Then he takes the glass. “The drink shall come with me then. And I with you.”

“No”, Porsche says again, with a little more determination. “That is not a place for a guy like you.”

Kinn’s forehead crinkles and he seems a lot more sober all of a sudden. “Where the fuck are you going, Porsche?”

“Somewhere where people like you shouldn’t. I’ll see you tomorrow?” He leans in to give him a quick kiss on the cheek and then pulls away before Kinn has any time to object.

“How’s the crowd?” Porsche asks while he takes off his shirt.

“Drunk. A little disappointed the last fight ended too quickly. If you can draw this one out, the promoter will love it. Might give you a better spot next time. Energy drink?” Jom offers him a brightly-coloured can with an English slogan.

“Thanks”, Porsche says and downs half of it. The sugar and caffeine are rushing through him, making his heartbeat pick up. Or maybe that’s just the anxiety. Truth is, Porsche is not looking forward to this. Maybe he’s going soft. Kinn’s dinners and his easy company have ruined him for the rougher side of life.

He shakes himself out of it. Charming rich boys are not a reliable source of income. Beating people up for entertainment is.

He yanks this shirt over his head and stands. Jom sucks in his breath through his teeth. “Fuck, Porsche. Is this still from last time?”

“Huh? Oh. Yeah, no, this looks worse than it is.” It’s the bandage, making him look like an invalid when really all it is is a few cracked ribs. He undoes it, only feeling a little bad about it. Kinn had paid for that and in a minute, Porsche will make all his efforts go to waste. But he’ll also make half of Chay’s tuition. He gives Jom a bright smile. “Let’s get this show on the road!”

Porsche’s opponent is young and big. Both not good. Porsche can works with big and old or young and slender. He’ll either have youth or mass on his side. This guy looks like he has thirty pounds on him and he still has a baby face. At this point, Porsche can only hope that he is inexperienced.

Still, even if he looses, he’ll get paid. Only half, but half is better than nothing. The host introduces them with a slew of adjectives that make them both seem more dangerous than they truly are. The crowd is roaring. They are ready for a good fight. Porsche is not, but he will still give them one.

The host lifts the (real) gun into the air to give the starting shot when someone grabs his hand.

“Hey, what the fuck?” the man says as Porsche says: “Kinn?! What the hell are you doing here?”

“The question should be, what the fuck do you think you’re doing here?” Porsche’s new maybe-more-than-a-friend shoots back, not looking tipsy or soft at all.

“Man, you need to get out of the ring”, the host tells Kinn and wrenches his hand away, clearly pissed. So is the crowd.

“Gladly”, Kinn says, “we were leaving anyway.” And then he makes a grab for Porsche. Who steps back and out of his reach.

“I’m not going anywhere. I am fighting.”

“Not with those ribs you’re not”, Kinn responds matter-of-factly. The arrogance with which he thinks he gets to make decisions about Porsche’s life starts to seriously annoy him.

“My ribs are none of your business. And neither am I!” Porsche knows he’s being mean. That last bit, that was being mean. And unnecessary. He knows Kinn cares about him as much as Porsche cares about Kinn. The difference is that Porsche would never dare to trample over Kinn’s life like that, not when they barely know each other. A small, bitter part points out that even if he wanted to, he couldn’t, because Kinn keeps his private life out of Porsche’s reach.

Kinn glares at him and for a moment, Porsche thinks he’ll just try to drag him out the ring. At which point they’ll get to find out whether Porsche can fight him. But Kinn visibly takes a deep breath to calm himself. “You want to finish this fight? Fine.” He turns to the host. “Declare him the winner.”

The host just scoffs. “Man, if you have trouble in paradise, take your boy and go.”

“I said”, Kinn repeats himself, more slowly and he’s twisting his hand in an odd way that makes the light of the floodlights catch on his ring, “declare him the winner.”

The host squints at him, then he takes a step back all of a sudden and raises his right arm. Porsche’s side.

“And the winner is The Phoenix”, he declares loudly. The crowd responds with stunned silence before erupting into loud hollers and protests. What is Kinn doing? What is he doing! He’s jerking around a couple hundred drunk, armed, blood thirsty people. At this point, he’ll get them both hurt!

“Unbelievable!” Porsche rants as he grabs him by the arm to march him off the ring and off to the side. Kinn follows along quietly for two seconds, then he takes charge and steers them towards the right. Porsche can spot Big in the crowd and a couple of similarly dressed black-suited men that he does not recognise. In their professional attire, they stand out against the rowdy crowd. As does the suspiciously unsuspicious black vehicle.

Porsche still gets in. He does not really want an audience for the kind of conversation he is about to have with Kinn.

“Look, you cannot-”, he starts but Kinn cuts him off with a gesture that is so commanding that Porsche loses all his word from sheer outrage.

“I know you want to argue with me, but I am not in an arguing mood. I will drive you home and then we’ll talk about this tomorrow.”

Porsche is honestly breathless from the audacity of this man. Who does Kinn think he is? Who does he think Porsche is? His little brother? One of his underlings?

In one thing Porsche does agree with him though, there is no use in arguing. So he tries the door. Kinn does not stop him. Turns out, he doesn’t need to since the doors are locked. And the engine is coming to life.

“Kinn”, Porsche says, his tone a clear warning now. “Let me out.”

“I will”, the other man promises, “at your house.”

“Let me out now!”

The car is already pulling out of the parking lot and within a minute, they are on the road, back towards the city outskirts, where his home is. Where his little brother is sleeping (or staying up late to watch the hundredth rerun of a Wik concert) and counting on Porsche to have the money ready so he can continue going to school next semester.

“This is not funny”, Porsche says, beyond furious now. He yanks harder at the door handle. To no avail. He didn’t think the door would budge but it’s better to enact some useless violence against the car than do nothing. “I need the fight money. You have no idea what you are messing with here.” Kinn doesn’t. This is Porsche’s life. Porsche’s little brother. Kinn cannot waltz in and declare Porsche should no longer pursue his most profitable line of income because Kinn cannot stand to see him hurt. Where does he get off?

“Your ribs need time to heal”, Kinn says as if Porsche is not very aware of that himself.

“My ribs don’t have time because the new semester starts soon, with or without my rib’s agreement.”

“Is this about money?” Kinn asks, completely oblivious. Porsche wants to smack him.

“No, I just enjoy getting beaten up. It’s my pastime.”

Kinn gives him a considering looks before he says: “You’re a real comedian.” Then he reaches into the breast pocket of his jacket and pulls out a wallet. He takes out several notes without counting or even really looking at them and holds them out to Porsche. Who just stares. “Take it”, Kinn says.

“Do you even know how much money you’re offering me right now?” Porsche asks, incredulous.

Kinn looks at the paper and then shrugs. “Couple of thousand, I would guess.”

“You would guess”, he repeats faintly and makes no move to the money from him. Kinn tries to put the notes in Porsche’s hand but he pulls it away.

“What?” the other man wants to know, his brows twitching a little with annoyance. But he keeps it under control.

“I don’t want your money”, Porsche says.

Kinn takes a deep breath in, a long exhale out. “And why, pray tell, not?”

“Because it’s your money.” It’s difficult to explain, but until five minutes ago, Porsche liked him. Really liked him. And he does not want money to interfere with that like it interferes with everything. Porsche would know. It ruined his relationship with his uncle, at time, and Porsche hates himself for it, it even puts a strain on his love for his brother. When Chay needs yet another thing, for school, for life, just in general. He’s a good kid. Porsche knows he is. He’s also so god damn expensive and some days, Porsche does not know where he’s going to get all this money from to pay just for… for Chay being a kid and existing. “I don’t want your money and also, don’t do this again.”

Kinn gets a stubborn look on his face so Porsche takes it between his hands until Kinn can look at nothing and nobody but him. “I mean it. Don’t do this again. You don’t know these places, these people. They’re dangerous.”

Kinn frowns, then his eyes go very, very soft. “You’re worried about me?”

Porsche hisses and then gives his head a little shove. “Idiot. I am mostly mad at you. Ninety percent mad. But yes, maybe ten percent worried. You don’t belong in places like those, with your fancy suits and expensive watches. Trust me.”

Kinn, oddly enough, looks like Porsche just said the sweetest thing ever when really, all he is doing is giving him a warning. He doesn’t know how to make him understand. “There are some bad people there, Kinn.”

The other man reaches out and then puts his hand in Porsche’s neck, his fingers gently squeezing the tendons there, massaging the tension out of them. “I’m not so fragile, don’t worry. I can handle bad people.”

Porsche scoffs but he does lean into his touch. He can be pissed and getting a neck massage, okay? Porsche is smart. He can multitask.

Turns out, it’s really fucking hard to hold onto your anger when someone is digging into your muscles like that, making pain and relief shoot down your spine. Porsche is dimly aware that he might be making noises. Mostly though, he is floating. He doesn’t remember scooting closer but he must have, because Kinn is right behind him, warmth radiating off of him and into Porsche. Which is good, since the AC in the car is blasting and Porsche did not think to collect his shirt before marching Kinn out of danger.

His skin is slightly pebbled with goose-flesh. Which is ridiculous. It’s way over thirty degrees outside, even at night. The moment he’s stepping out of this car, Porsche will be sweating again. In there though, it is a little chilly to go naked on top.

“I’m sorry”, Kinn says, his arms coming up to wrap around Porsche. Who gladly leans into his warmth.

“Are you though?” Somehow, he has his doubts. Porsche would like to believe Kinn. It’s just, Porsche feels Kinn is one hundred percent the kind of person that will tell you sorry to your face and then continue exhibiting the exact behaviour that forced them to apologise in the first place.

“I am sorry for making you mad”, Kinn relents, “I still maintain that I was right overall.” Porsche sighs. Of course he fucking does.

“Right to interfere with my life, huh? Who gave you that right?”

“Right to keep you safe. And I took that right for myself.”

It really hard to be mad at that, even if Porsche still isn’t thrilled with the audacity. “I know what you are trying to do here is sweet. But also not okay, okay?”

Kinn hooks his chin over Porsche’s shoulder and nuzzles against his throat.

They reach Porsche’s home. Before Porsche can open the door, Kinn drapes his jacket over his shoulders. “For making you leave your shirt behind”, he explains. Porsche feels his heart seize. This man makes him furious. He also makes him stupid in the head and giddy with emotion. So he accepts the suit jacket and buttons it up until it’s barely noticeable that he’s not wearing anything underneath.

“I’ll see you soon”, he says.

“Big will pick you up tomorrow to get your bandages redone.”

Porsche opens his mouth but then closes it without argument. Mostly because he suspects that it would be pointless anyway. And also because maybe it was nice getting his injuries tended to and if Kinn is offering, well, Porsche would be stupid to turn that down.

It’s not until he puts Kinn’s designer jacket on a hanger that he notices the wad of cash shoved into one of the pockets.

Chapter Text

He does not want to take the money Kinn more or less forced onto him. He is determined not to.

But then the guy who arranges the fights is pissed at him for bringing all that commotion to his event. There is talk about Porsche attracting the wrong kind of people and Porsche has to agree on that. Kinn is the exact kind of wrong people to bring to an underground fight.

It’s still unfair because it’s not like Porsche invited him. Quite the opposite, really. He wants Kinn among that crowd even less then the hosts wants him there.

Problem is, Kinn has probably never been told ‘no’ in his life so it’s very difficult to get him to understand the concept of it. Porsche is not sure he’s the man for the job.

He tries to make up for the loss of income by picking up extra shifts and flirting with absolutely everyone and everything that moves, but the simple truth is that people pay a lot better to watch him get the shit beaten out of him than making cocktails.

The deadline for Chay’s tuition rolls around and with a heavy heart, Porsche reaches for the forbidden money. In the end, it’s his little brother’s education or Porsche’s pride and for Chay, he could put a whole lot more aside.

Chay, bless him, does not know anything about any of this and rolls into his new semester with a fresh uniform and new textbooks. He’s excited and diligent and Porsche loves him more than life itself. Porsche might bit a little bit biased, okay, extremely biased, he’s just a good kid and the best little brother anyone could ask for. Far better than Porsche deserves.

Porsche is up early to sent him off to school with a warm breakfast. He is in the middle of reheating last meal’s noodles when he spots Chay’s wallet under the table. It must have fallen out when his little brother threw his backpack there yesterday.

Porsche picks it up, surprised by how heavy it feels.

He wastes half a moment thinking about privacy and then opens it. Inside is a cute photo of them when they were both a little younger and, not surprisingly, all the Wik pictures Chay could fit into his little wallet.

There is also So. Much. Money.

Porsche stares at it. Where did this come from? What is his little brother, his baby brother, up to these days that he’s got a small fortune just casually tugged away next to his pop idol pics?

Porsche knew it. He should not have gotten involved with Kinn as much as he did. Because between Humbar, the fights and now Kinn, he has not been paying enough attention to Chay and now his baby brother has gotten himself into some serious trouble.

As if summoned, Chay uses that very moment to bumble down the stairs, loud and carefree as ever. He does not look like a boy who sells drugs or worse when he skips over to Porsche with a bright smile. The smile falters once he sees the look on Porsche’s face.

“Hia?”

“Why do you have a butt-load of cash?” Porsche cuts straight to the point.

“Huh? Oh. That.”

“Yes, that!” He takes the money out. More than a dozen banknotes of high and higher value. “Chay, what the hell? Where did you get this? What did you do?”

Porsche is two seconds away from losing it and he never loses it on Chay. But the mere though of his brother being out there, doing whatever illicit thing that pays like this, because in no way is a school kid making this kind of cash on a normal job, makes his blood run cold. This is everything Porsche worked so hard to avoid. He thought he did a decent job at it too. Sure, the debt collectors are a nightmare and Chay has to go without more often than Porsche would like to (the ideal amount of times would be zero, in fact) but at least Porsche kept him fed, in school and out of trouble.

Or so he thought!

“Nothing!” his baby brother argues back, sounding a little bit offended. “I didn’t do anything!”

“Chay, come on. Do you think I’m stupid? How did you make this much money?”

“I am telling you, I didn’t do anything. P’Kim-“

“Kim?!” Porsche interrupts and sees red. Maybe that sweet little idol gig was not so sweet after all. “What the hell did Kim pay you this much for? What did he want you to do?”

Logically, there are only two things Porsche can think of that people, men, would pay this kind of money for and both make him want to vomit and then tear off Kim’s face.

“Get home”, Chay answers, snatching his wallet out of a distracted Porsche’s hands. “He asked me to get home safely, hia.” He looks upset. “What did you think? What do you think of P’Kim? And of me!”

He looks seriously hurt. The thing is, Porsche knows that his brother is the sweetest kid alive. He’s kind, humble and talented. He’s also way too caring for his own good. If anyone suggested that he could be helping Porsche, there is nothing Chay would not agree to. Much like Porsche would do anything for him. The difference is, Porsche is used to it and Chay is fifteen and Porsche’s every waking moment has been spent trying to ensure that his baby brother never has to get used to anything.

“Fine”, Porsche says and takes a deep breaths. He is willing to give him the benefit of the doubt. Hell, he wants to be wrong. Desperately wants to be wrong and to know that he did not completely fail as an older brother. “Talk.”

“There is not much to talk to. We were at the studio. P’Kim got a call. He was upset about it but it seemed important, so he had to leave and couldn’t drive me home. He called a taxi and gave me the fare.” He points at the banknotes on the table between them.

“This is not taxi fare money though.”

Chay has the nerve to grin. “No, it’s not, right? But I don’t think P’Kim knows how much a taxi actually costs.”

“Do you think I am dumb?” Porsche asks, but then quickly continues talking before his cheeky little brother can get any ideas. “You’re telling me Kim gave you thousands of Baths, expecting that to be necessary to pay for a one way ride?”

Chay shrugs. “I don’t think he has a very good understanding of, like, normal people stuff. Then again, he is not normal”, his eyes get that starry quality that they get whenever Wik is being brought up.

Porsche collects the money and hands it back to Chay. He’s not sure he believes any of this. Then he remembers Kinn just holding out a wad of cash to him, no idea how much exactly he was offering, and suddenly, it doesn’t seem that unlikely any more.

Still, Porsche has to ask: “If he ever does anything or asks anything of you that makes you feel uncomfortable, you tell me, right? Chay? You’ll tell me and I will kick in his pretty straight teeth.”

“Hia, don’t!” Chay immediately protests the theoretical violation of his favourite idol. “Also, P’Kim never asks anything of me.” He sounds rather upset about it. “I wish he’d ask me to do stuff for him. I could be so helpful at…”, he has to think for a moment, “well, I am sure I could be helpful in some way. If only he’d let me!”

Okay, maybe Porsche does buy it after all. Maybe Kim really is just a weird but overall pretty stand-up guy, careful about the years between them and the limitless adoration Chay holds for him.

His little brother stuffs the money back inside the wallet. Porsche thinks about telling him to return the rest, that it’s not right to take advantage of Kim just because he is an out-of-touch idol, but then doesn’t. If Chay has a bit of cash for an emergency, that’s a good thing and Kim probably already forgot about the money.

Chay rounds the table to give him a quick hug. Porsche returns the gesture on autopilot before asking: “What was that for?”

“You looked like you needed some reassurance”, his little brother says and Porsche barely resists the urge to pull him in, close to his chest, and never let him go again. He wants to pry open his ribs and hide Chay inside.

But Chay is fifteen, he has his own life, his friends and, as of now, a crush that is no longer just a fantasy. Porsche almost but not quite regrets taking him to that concert.

Chay, unaware of his brother’s inner struggle, gives Porsche a bright smile. “I’m off to Ohm’s, see you later.”

Porsche watches him bustle through the door, already texting his little friend, and feels a little overwhelmed.

~°~°~°

“If you could be anything. Anything you want. What would you like to do?”

Porsche has halfway disappeared into the fridge, hunting for tonight’s dinner and Kinn’s words are muffled in here.

“Huh?” he says and pulls out a chunk of broccoli. It’s a little wilted around the edges, but if he fries that hot enough, nobody will notice. Chay will douse the whole thing in sauce anyway. It’ll do. “I don’t know, why?”

“I’m just curious. If money wasn’t an issue, what would you like to do?”

Porsche carries his find over to the sink and starts washing and cutting. He shrugs. “I never really thought about that. Go back to uni, I guess.”

“You went to university?” Kinn says and he sounds a lot closer now. He’s been lounging on Porsche’s couch, but he must have gotten up to join him in the kitchen. Porsche shoots him an affronted look over his shoulder.

“Sound less surprised, please and thank you. I had a full scholarship and everything.”

“Really?” Kinn says again, failing miserably at sounding less surprised. When he’s close enough, Porsche stomps on his foot as punishment. Since he’s just in socks, the damage he does is minimal.

Kinn laughs and wraps his arms around his waist, hooking his chin over Porsche’s shoulder. He gives him a little kiss on the cheek and Porsche feels the outrage drain from him. “So smart”, Kinn praises and Porsche’s face gets a little warmer.

“It was a sport’s scholarship”, he admits after a moment. Kinn chuckles softly and kisses him again.

“Okay. So capable then. For taekwondo? You won some national championships, didn’t you?”

“I did”, Porsche says, still proud of it, then he pauses. “Wait, did I tell you about that?”

Kinn’s face freezes for a second. Then, like curtains being drawn, his soft, pleasant smile is back in place. He nuzzles against Porsche’s temple while one hand rubs little circles low into Porsche’s belly. Very low. “Yeah, you did.”

“Okay”, Porsche says and can’t really remember, but also half of his blood has just abandoned his head and it’s not really that important anyway. “I… need to make dinner”, he tries to discourage Kinn, though Porsche will be the first to admit that it’s not very heart-felt.

“Let me order in”, Kinn suggests as he’s turning him around and crowding him in against the sink.

There’s probably a reason why Porsche shouldn’t let him. Decorum or something about accepting too many gifts from people you technically don’t know that well, but Porsche has little desire for days-old broccoli and a lot of desire for Kinn, so fuck it.

“Okay.” He lets the knife clutter back onto the board to wrap both arms around the other man and pull him closer.

Kinn kisses him like he’s going to war even if Porsche isn’t putting up a single defence, it’s almost impossible to keep up. So he holds on and lets himself be swept away by Kinn’s intensity.

Kinn’s hands are on his hips, the next moment, they’re under his thighs and then Porsche is being lifted up onto the counter with Kinn pressing in between his legs.

Porsche is not blind. He knows that Kinn is welt built, he has eyes. It’s not a surprise that he’s strong enough to lift him and it shouldn’t do things for Porsche.

It does things for Porsche.

~°~°~°

It’s early in the the morning. Porsche didn’t even have breakfast yet, what he has instead is a full house already. The moment they woke up, Kim stood outside their door, patiently waiting to be let inside, which Chay did with a high pitched gurgle of joy.

Shortly after, Kinn shows up and while Porsche can contain the high-pitched noises, the smile splitting his face is no less enthusiastic than Chay’s was. Only Kim seems wholly unamused to see his older brother.

“What are you doing here?” he grumbles.

“Ah, Nong, don’t be like that. Can’t I want to see my little brother?” He moves to ruffle Kim’s artfully styled hair, but thinks better of it when the younger man glares at him hard enough to do harm.

“I will cut you”, he threatens. Apparently it’s not an idle threat either because Kinn does lower his hand.

“I also wanted to see Porsche”, Kinn admits in that casual way of his that has Porsche’s heart squeezing in his chest. Kinn’s so open with his affection, like it’s nothing, like wanting to see Porsche is the most natural thing in the world for him. It makes it incredibly easy for Porsche to be honest about his feeling too.

“Is that breakfast?” Chay interrupts their moment.

“Chay”, Porsche admonishes him but Kinn just laughs and holds out the bag he’s carrying to him.

“I wouldn’t dare show up empty handed.”

Funnily enough, that makes Kim take pause. “Do you want coffee?” he asks Chay. “I could tell Big to get you something.”

“Nah, I’m good”, Porsche’s little brother says and then drags Kim with him towards the kitchen to set the table. Porsche and Kinn are left to stare at each other.

“How did you sleep?” Kinn asks softly as he comes over to kiss Porsche on the cheek. His familiar warmth and his smell envelop him and Porsche leans in to get more of both. He wraps his arms around Kinn’s middle and the other man does the same. Hugging Kinn drains all the tension from Porsche and Kinn must feel similarly because he doesn’t let him go for a long time.

“Well enough. Before you ask, I did not dream of you.”

“Shame”, Kinn laughs. “The fact that I do not consume your every waking or sleeping moment clearly needs to be rectified.”

Porsche hides his laugh against the other man’s shoulder.

“You are insane, you know that? Nobody just admits to stuff like that.”

“Nobody you knew so far”, Kinn corrects him and then with one more kiss to the crown of his head, lets him go. Because Porsche is a grown-up and also their little brothers are right there, he does not whine at the loss of contact.

Once breakfast is devoured and the dishes cleared away, Chay and Kim take a seat on each side of Porsche, who immediately knows he is being ambushed.

“So, there is something-“, Kim starts bluntly but Chay cuts in.

He makes his eyes go as big as they can, which is pretty big, actually, and looks up at Porsche through his lashes like he’s still much smaller than he actually is.

“You know I love you very much, hia, right?”

“What do you want?”

“You’ve always taken such good care of me and taught me how to be responsible.”

“Chay. Out with it.”

“So, you know how we never quite see stars because of all the lights? And how it’s such a shame that there’s only, like, the same three constellations all the time and-“
“Chay!”

“Chay wants to see the stars. We have a vacation home up north. We want to go there”, Kim jumps in, listing everything in that blunt, no nonsense way he has whenever he is not in front of a camera and paid for his charm.

“Absolutely not”, Porsche says immediately. Let his little brother drive off to somewhere ‘up north’. With an older boy that Porsche would technically consider harmless, he’s an idol, for crying out loud, but in the end not harmless enough to entrust his baby brother with for an impromptu unsupervised get-away. What if something happens to him? Kim is only 19 himself. He won’t know what to do. This sounds terrible.

“But hia!”

“No.”

“Pleeeeeeeease!”

“I said no. You’re not going on some star-gazing trip alone.”

“I’d be there!” Kim interjects. Porsche tries to think of a way that conveys ‘you don’t count, you’re practically still a child yourself’ without sounding quite so insulting. Before he can think of one, Kinn says: “It’s been ages since I saw a proper night sky.”

Kim whips his head around to glare at him. “You are not invited.”

Kinn places a hand over his heart and feigns being deeply wounded. “So cold, Nong.” He shoots him a smile. “I was just thinking out loud anyway. Surely Porsche doesn’t have the time to go on an extended weekend-trip.”

Chay’s the first who catches on. He grabs Porsche’s hand and clutches is between his. “Yes, hia? If we all go, I can go? You can be right there. Well… maybe not right there. But in the vicinity.”

“Too generous of you”, Porsche remarks.

“It’s very beautiful though”, Kinn says and Porsche does not know why he’s helping his little brother with this. “It’s also very private”, Kinn adds with a wink. Next to him, Kim rolls his eyes so hard Porsche is worried he’ll strain something. But at least Kinn’s intention is a little clearer now. This is less about helping Chay spend some quality time with his favourite person and more about ensuring Kinn gets to spend some quality time with… Porsche.

It’s three to one and secretly, Porsche has to admit that a little weekend-trip to see the stars does sound nice. Romantic even. And just like a break from the constant stream of fires he has to put out here.

It doesn’t take much longer before he caves and asks: “When?”

~°~°~°

“I’m off. See you tonight.”

“Hold on. Wait. Where are you going? When will you be back?”

“Hi~a”, Chay whines. “I am just at P’Kim’s. He promised to show me his guitar collection.”

It’s a testament to Porsche’s trust in the idol that he believes that Kim actually means to show his brother some instruments and not something more, well, personal.

“I’ll take you.”

“Hia no, you’ll just embarrass me. I can take a taxi.”

“You can stay here and do your homework. Or you can let me drive you to this place you’ve never been to so I know where to look first if you don’t come home.”

Chay does not have a come-back for that. They leave the house and Porsche puts the helmet on his little brother’s head before climbing onto the motorbike.

“You need to stop treating P’Kim like a criminal and me like a baby.”

“I will do that once you’re 40 and have a black-belt in taekwondo. Now, give me the address.”

Kim’s home is nice. As in nice nice. It’s a sky rise in the middle of the city and, of course, Kim lives at the top. The rent must be insane.

Then Porsche remembers that people living in places like these probably do not rent.

“Hey Chay”, the idol greets his little brother with a warm smile. He’s in a white, oversized hoodie and he looks very soft and approachable. His face turns significantly colder and more reserved when he spots Porsche though. “Oh. You’re here too.”

“Hey Nong”, Porsche says, mostly because he’s fairly certain that it’ll piss off Kim. Given the way his expression becomes even more pinched, it works. “You don’t mind, right? I dropped Chay off, gotta know where my litter brothers spends his time, don’t I?”

“Hia!” Chay complains and sounds mortified. “Please.” He rams his skinny, pointy elbow into Porsche’s side.

Kim steps aside to let them in. Well, he steps aside to let Chay in and Porsche just follows him. He considers ruffling Kim’s artfully tousled hair but he’s afraid he’ll get bit if he tries.

Once inside, Chay makes a beeline for the bathroom. Without having to ask for direction. Which means just one thing: He’s been here before.

All those times practising with Kim apparently did not all take part at the studio. Porsche could be pissed, but he tries not to cry over spilled milk. Kim has established himself as a more permanent fixture in hit little brother’s life, so Porsche will have to lay down some ground rules.

“Do you have a moment to talk?” Porsche asks politely. Kim gives him an odd look.

“I’m standing right in front of you. If you want to talk, talk.”

Asshole.

“You know that Chay is fifteen, yes?”

“Born September fourth at eight fifty-five in the evening”, Kim agrees.

Porsche is a little thrown by that answer. “What?” Where did Kim even get that information? Porsche doesn’t know when exactly his little brother was born though the time is probably written on some document somewhere. “What I am trying to get at is, he’s my little brother and I beat the crap out of people for a living.”

Kim just continues giving him that blank look. When it becomes clear that Porsche expects some sort of verbal acknowledgment, he says: “That is both correct.” He says it in the same tone Porsche employs with especially dim-witted customers.

“Look, if anybody was to hurt my little brother, I would mess them up.”

At that, Kim is finally standing up a little taller. He even pulls his hands out of his pockets and looks Porsche straight in the eyes. “Well, I would hope so!” he says with more passion and indignation than Porsche has heard him employ… well… ever. There’s something dark crossing over his picture perfect face. “Is anybody trying to hurt Chay?”

“No, of course not, I would never allow that.”

“Ah”, the idol relaxes a little. Then he pats Porsche on the shoulder. “Well, see that is stays that way. I’ll drop him off at ten. Or better, nine, it’s a school night tomorrow.”

And with that, Porsche finds himself dismissed. He would protest, but he actually has a shift to get to and Chay seems to be in weirdly socially inept, but safe hands.

~°~°~°

It’s a slow Tuesday and Porsche is not needed at the bar. And there are no fights during the weeks, the onlookers trapped in their day-jobs and obligations. Nobody has time or the need for bloody distractions.

Chay’s having a sleepover with Ohm and Porsche has one of those rare evenings where he has the house all to himself and nobody needs him. So naturally, he called Kinn and asked him if he’d like to come over.

Kinn liked to come over. And he brought food. And some more of the good champagne that Porsche is actually not that fond of but did not have the heart to turn down. Not when Kinn looked at him like that when he offered him the glass.

There’s something mundane playing on the TV that they are not paying attention to.

Kinn has lost his suit jacket, haphazardly thrown over the back of the sofa and he looks so good in his unbuttoned deep red shirt and pale skin. It’s only natural for Porsche to climb into his lap to better make out with him.

Time flies by between heady kisses and warm touches. They only stop to enjoy some of the food Kinn brought, otherwise completely wrapped up in each other’s company.

Porsche likes him. He likes him so much. His warmth, his steady adoration, the way Kinn touches Porsche like he can never get enough of him. It’s novel and intoxicating to be wanted this much. The most people have wanted out of Porsche is a shag behind the bar. Not that those aren’t fantastic, but this, this is so much better.

At some point, Kinn excuses himself to go to the bathroom and Porsche has melted into the sofa, more hanging off of it than sitting.

His upper thigh starts to vibrate and when he shifts, he finds Kinn's phone there. His fancy, new phone, lit up with the letter “K”.

Porsche doesn’t think about it. If he had, he probably would have realised that it’s a little invasive, that they don’t know each other that well yet. But he’s full of good food and happy and a little bit tipsy, so he swipes up.

“Sorry, your brother isn’t here right now”, he says, fully expecting to hear Kim’s melodic voice at the other end.

“And who might this be?” a man says. Porsche immediately sits up straighter, mortified.

“Sorry”, he mumbles, “I thought…”

“What are you doing?”

Porsche lowers the phone to turn around, apology ready on his tongue, but dying when he sees how furious Kinn is.

“I didn’t… I wasn’t…”

Kinn does not let him finish, instead stalking over to him and yanking the phone out of his hand. He looks so pissed. Like, seriously mad.

“Hello?” he barks into the phone. Then he goes stiff all over, his eyes fixed on Porsche with an almost manic glint. “Father”, he says, his voice a lot more controlled. “Nobody. Just some waiter, who doesn’t know his place.” He listens. “No, that won’t be necessary. Of course, Father.”

His father must hang up because Kinn slides the phone into the back pocket of his slacks. Then he looks back up at Porsche, who feels like he’s back in the eyes of something large and dangerous.

“Look, Kinn, I just… I wasn’t thinking… I didn’t mean…”

Kinn interrupts his ramblings by grabbing his chin and shaking him. Hard. Like an unruly dog. “Never do that again. You hear me? Never.”

Chapter Text

Porsche gets hurt on a regular basis, one might even say professionally. The grip on his face it still too tight and uncomfortable. And it’s personal. It’s roughness at the hands of someone who until two minutes ago, Porsche would have sworn is personally invested in his well-being.

He shoves Kinn away. Then he gets up from the sofa, because he does not like how small and trapped it makes him feel to have the other man loom over him like that.

“I’m sorry”, he repeats, more composed now and starting to get angry himself. Kinn is too much. He’s reacting like Porsche was about to steal his phone. “I shouldn’t have answered the call. I wasn’t thinking – I thought it was your brother and I just wanted to let Kim know you’re fine.”

He walks away to put some distance between them, but Kinn does not let him, coming after.

“You know I have a”, he stops himself, “demanding job.” Porsche just knows that that was not what he initially wanted to say. “Don’t take my phone, don’t talk to the people involved in my work.”

“That was your father”, Porsche points out because he feels like he’s being accused of something he did not do. He only answered Kinn’s phone to say that he couldn’t pick up right now.

It’s not like Porsche divulged company secrets!

Porsche doesn’t know any company secrets. He’s not even sure what company exactly Kinn is running (something about importing luxury vehicles and… bread? But Porsche might be wrong on that one.).

“You especially do not talk to my father”, Kinn says with finality. Porsche is not sure whether this speaks of a rocky father-son relationship or if this is due to Porsche status as… Kinn’s secret. “It’s best for everyone if my father doesn’t know you exist”, he rubs at his temple, “though that ship has sailed now.”

Porsche is hurt. His family knows about Kinn. Granted, he only has Chay, but if Porsche had a father, he would have told him about Kinn. At last a little bit.

“Is it because I’m a man?” he wants to know. That would make sense, right? Oldest son, heir to the family, all that. Kinn’s probably expected to find a nice woman and have a bunch of mini-Kinns to continue the family line. Not mess around with Porsche who has nothing and can’t even get pregnant.

Porsche doesn’t like what that spells for their future.

“What?” Kinn blinks at him like Porsche just completely caught him off guard. “No. No, everyone knows I like men.” He lifts one hand as if to touch, but Porsche sways out of reach. “Come here”, Kinn says, his tone more soothing now. Porsche still gives him the stink-eye. “Porsche”, it is probably supposed to be a growl but Kinn is smiling a little bit and so it loses a lot of its threat.

Porsche doesn’t come, but he also does not protest when Kinn bridges the distance between them and wraps his arms around him to pull him in. His warmth is familiar and makes it very fucking difficult to cling to his anger. Porsche still doesn’t think what he did was that bad or warranted that level of outrage, but he can acknowledge that he was in the wrong.

“I won’t touch your phone again”, he promises.

Kinn hums and it ruffles the little hairs in Porsche’s neck. “You better not.”

*~*~*

It's a lazy Monday evening. Hum Bar won't be busy tonight, so Porsche is not scheduled for a shift. Kinn had another one of his top secret businesses meetings – not that Porsche asked him repeatedly if he wanted to hang out; it's chill, they are so chill, Porsche is very chill about getting to spend time with Kinn, okay? And Kinn in general. – and Kim is WIKing on some promo-tour.

For the first time in a while, it's just him and Chay lazing around on their couch. It's... nice. Things have been so hectic, they barely got a chance to hang out as just them.

One of Chay's beloved singing competitions is playing on the TV, but neither of them is really watching, both messing around on their phones.

Chay's feet are tucked under Porsche's thighs and things are cosy until all of a sudden, his little brother jerks upright with a gasp.

"This is the best thing that has ever happened to me!" Chay squeals.

"What?" Porsche wants to know, eager to share in his little brother's good news. "What happened?"

Instead of an answer, Chay turns his phone so Porsche can see the screen. Unsurprisingly, it's a photo of WIK. Personally, he doesn't think it's his best one, but Porsche is not the expert here. 

"Hia, look! Look!"

"I am looking! What am I looking at?"

Chay sighs, clearly fed up with explaining the obvious to a painfully clueless brother.

"That's a picture of the skin-care promotion we were allowed to witness."

Right. Two hours that Porsche will never get back spent watching Kim sell overpriced lotion .

"I remember."

Chay taps the edge of the screen. "And that", he says with the gravitas of a scientist just having watched the birth of a star. "Is my shoulder."

Porsche squints at the screen. It could be. Or it's the shoulder of any of the other dozens of fans floored by the opportunity to sit in the same room as their idol and watch Wik do a sales pitch. The whole thing was supremely bizarre to Porsche, but Chay loved it, which is all that matters

"Are you sure?"

His little brother gives him a look as if Porsche has just greatly insulted him. "I have never been more sure of anything in my life. See this thread? It started coming apart and I fixed it." He points to a line on the shoulder that is admittedly a little bit crooked. "It did not come together quite as neatly as it had been", Chay continues, "but if you don't know it's there, you barely see it."

Porsche has to agree with him on that. It also breaks his heart thinking about his little brother fixing one of his few "good" shirts because even the good shirts are not all that good any more. Maybe he can pick up an extra shift at Hum Bar this week. One of the not so busy ones that Porsche avoids in favour of getting to spend time with Chay and take care of the household. But surely Chay would understand, appreciate it even, if he had to miss one brother's night to buy him something nice. Something really nice. 

"This is definitely my shoulder." Chay beams at him. "And do you know what that means?"

I have failed as a guardian, Porsche does not say because that would upset Chay and he never wants to upset Chay. So just shrugs. 

"That, hia", Chay explains with the patience of the truly tried and tested, "means that I am on Wik's social media!" He lets out a high pitched giggled and proceeds to flood the comment box with a barrage of emojis. 

Porsche would think it's a bit much. But it's barely been a second and Chay's phone lights up with Wik's photo. A prettier, more styled one that Porsche thinks he has seen Chay gushing over before.

"You saw", he hears Kim's voice on the other end. He sounds tinny and far away. Porsche cannot believe that Kim has been checking his own social media account to wait for the moment Chay spotted part of his shoulder on a picture. 

What if Chay had not... well, okay, that is a futile thought. Obviously, Chay is stalking Wik's profile relentlessly and obviously, he remembers every event any photo has ever been taken at. Especially one he got to attend himself. 

"Of course I saw", Chay says, completely breathless even though all he has done is stand up. He is a ball of nervous energy and Porsche is slightly insulted, but not at all surprised, when he gets abandoned for Chay to pace around their kitchen while he tells Kim everything he thought about the new photo and then makes Kim tell him all about his day. 

It sounds fairly boring from this side of the conversation, just a bunch of photo shoots. Chay still finds it riveting and asks a hundred follow up questions. Some of them downright insane. "What kind of marmalade?" "Yes, that's important." "Well, could you check tomorrow when you have breakfast there again?" "Okay. Yes. Please do."

That night, Porsche's phone lights up. Porsche fishes it off his night-stand and answers with a grunt. He was half asleep and he's not in the greatest moods at being interrupted. "Yeah?" he mumbles into the plastic. 

"I woke you up", Kinn says. He sounds … sombre. Strange. Porsche's brain wants to stutter awake but he is so bone tired and his bed is soft and Kinn's voice, despite it all, is warm. 

Porsche makes a sound that might have been agreement, might have been a yawn. "I don't mind", he forces his heavy tongue to say. "What's up?"

"Can I come over?"

"Now?" Porsche has no idea what time it is but it's late. Middle of the night late. All decent, hard working business men should be asleep kind of late. 

"Sure", he says before he can think about it. He always wants to see Kinn, even if he's so tired his eyes are drooping close again. 

"I'll be right over."

Porsche must have fallen back asleep because the next time he wakes up, it's to a heavy body crawling over him. Blearily, Porsche thinks that it was a good thing Kinn called him, otherwise he might freak out. Like this, he recognises the other man's shape and scent. Porsche reaches for him sleepily and makes a little 'oomph' sound when Kinn all but collapses onto him. He's heavy. Something that, Porsche finds, he sort of likes. It makes him feel grounded. 

"Are you okay?" he mumbles and opens one eye. Something is ... off about Kinn. Surely he's not hurt, right? Surely he'd know to go to a hospital instead of Porsche's home, where the best medical equipment to be found is an out of date emergency kit Chay got for when the fights were less for show and more serious. 

Still, just to be safe, Porsche sleepily pats at Kinn's broad back. He seems whole. No blood or open flesh wounds.

"Just let me hold you", the other man says. Which should be alarming since it is very much not the 'I am fine' Porsche had been hoping for. 

Kinn's arms sneak around his torso and underneath his back, forcing Porsche away from the mattress in an angle that is not entirely comfortable. Kinn's head falls onto his chest and he spends long moments just... lying there. 

"Kinn?" Porsche says into the darkness. "Are you okay? You're starting to worry me."

"I’m okay", he finally says. Since Porsche cannot see his face in the darkness, it is difficult to tell how truthful that statement is. "I'm great now, actually. Just let me", he takes a deep breath, inhaling Porsche's scent. "Just let me stay with you for the night, okay?"

Porsche will be honest, he has thought a lot about the first time Kinn would sleep in his bed. He might have been a little nervous about it too. Mainly because Porsche's bed, like everything else in his house, must be so far below what Kinn is used to. And also because when Porsche imagined him here, sleeping was not necessarily the first thought on his mind. And that's... not exactly a problem, but it puts him on edge. Porsche has no experience with men. Which is fine. It was never a problem. Until now. Now he wishes he had been a little more experimental when he was still in uni, just so he'd know about the deeds to be done with different plumbing. 

"Okay", he says gently and cards his fingers through Kinn's hair. It's laden down with product which now sticks to Porsche's palms. Porsche doesn't mind. Kinn moves until his nose bumps against Porsche's neck and then he goes slack. 

It's too warm. He's too heavy. His arms are forcing Porsche's spine to bend in a way it does not like to bend and there simply is no way Porsche will be able to comfortably sleep like this.

He wraps his arms around the other man and falls back asleep almost instantly. 

Even if he goes to bed at a somewhat reasonable hour, Porsche rarely wakes up before ten out of his own free will. When he finally opens his eyes, the sun is high in the sky and Kinn is still plastered to his back.

Porsche slowly, as to not wake the other man, turns around. He sucks in a breath. Kinn's left eye is almost swollen shut and his lips are busted. Porsche has seen these injuries in a mirror often enough to know that Kinn got beaten up. Badly. What the fuck kind of business deals does he do where his clients attack him? Porsche always thought that people who have businesses and go to meetings do not deal with the gruff realities of life. 

A glance down at least reveals that Kinn's knuckles are bloodied and bruised as well. So whoever did this to him is probably not looking too good either. For a brief moment, Porsche imagines Kinn, controlled, styled, in his immaculate suits, going at someone equally coiffed. Two business guys fighting it out over percentages. Or whatever it is that office people would brawl over. 

Still, seeing him hurt tugs at Porsche's heartstrings. He hates seeing him in pain and it's not just the physical injuries, it's how hollow and off he sounded last night. How he clutched Porsche to his chest and buried into his neck. 

"I can feel you staring at me", Kinn mumbles, eyes still closed. Nothing about his appearance gives away that he has woken up. He looks just as peaceful as he did a moment ago. 

"And what are you going to do about it?" Porsche quips back and brushes Kinn's hair out of his forehead. The other man sighs. It sounds content and like the weight of the world is lifted off his shoulders for the moment.

"Any other morning, I would do so much about it." 

Porsche goes a little hot and giddy about it. Curiosity slithers down his spine. He knows Kinn is too beat up to do much about anything and maybe Porsche prefers it like that right now, but the thought is still interesting.

Kinn nuzzles close and Porsche lets him, burying his face in the other man's dark hair. "Will you tell me what happened to you?"

Kinn makes a displeased sound but to Porsche's surprise, he does answer. "Business deal went sour."

"You don't say."

"Don't get cute."

"Can't help that. I always am."

Kinn takes a pit of skin between his fingers and pinches. "Ow!" Porsche slaps his hand away and is not even sorry when he touches the bloody knuckles. 

Kinn hisses and draws his hand back. 

"I am not sorry", Porsche says before the other man can complain. 

"Of course you're not." He does not sound pissed though. If Porsche didn't know any better, he'd say he sounds almost fond. "You're lucky I like you anyway."

That makes something sharp and happy curl low in Porsche's stomach. 

"You do, don't you?" he says, in awe of the idea. "You really do like me." He does not dare think about more, because ‘like’ is already fantastic. To be liked by a guy like Kinn is more than Porsche ever had. Ever.

Kinn goes very still for a moment and Porsche is worried he's pushed it too far. But then the other man impossibly scoots closer until his forehead is pressed against Porsche's.

"Of course I do." He says it like it's the easiest thing in the world. "How could I not? How could anyone not? The fact that you don't have...", he trails off.

"That I don't have what?" Porsche wants to know.

"Doesn't matter", Kinn says and wraps both arms around him. He squeezes Porsche until breathing becomes just a little difficult and that, too, feels surprisingly grounding. "You've got me now and I am not giving you up again."

"Okay", Porsche agrees and feels way too vulnerable admitting it, but Kinn deserves some truth of his own, "I don't want to be let go anyway."

They detangle eventually. Nature calls and Porsche feels sticky from the night's sweat. Kinn follows him like he's glued to him and fully intents to go into the shower with him as well, but Porsche has had enough vulnerability for one morning and he closes the door in Kinn's face. The other man is a good sport about it and only complaints a little bit through the door. 

They make their way down to the kitchen after that. Kinn beelines for the ridiculous coffee monstrosity and Porsche fries them some left over rice with eggs. It's nothing fancy, but it's very difficult to mess up and, with enough sauce, will always taste at least decent. 

Kinn watches him like Porsche is solving the most interesting problem in the world. It could make Porsche feel self-conscious, but the truth is, it feels good. Porsche feels seen in a way he rarely does. He gets a lot of attention for his looks and he's not saying that Kinn is not also paying him that kind of attention. But there is also something else. There is a glint in Kinn's eyes, a kind of appreciation that makes Porsche feel ten feet tall. 

Chay bundles into the kitchen. He seems way more awake than Porsche feels. He's probably been up for a moment by now and Porsche is a little glad that they didn't do anything more than cuddle. Having a little brother next door does put a damper on things a bit. It's a more organisational challenge. If, no, when they get to cross that line, they should probably not be here. Maybe they can rent a hotel? Kinn surely would pay for that. 

Maybe they can go to Kinn's place for once. ... Porsche shoves that thought aside. He's not ready to have that discussion again. At least, not now. The morning is so lovely, Kinn looks beat up, but a lot more alive than he sounded last night and Porsche's little brother is standing next to him, looking bewildered but unharmed. 

"P'Kinn, you're hurt." It almost sounds like an accusation. Kinn looks at his hands and subtly puts them behind his back. He can't do a whole lot about his face though. 

"It's nothing", he says with a reassuring but entirely unconvincing smile. Chay squints at him, so he adds: "I fell."

Hearing someone else say it in the face of such blatant evidence makes Porsche realise how ridiculous he must have sounded to Doctor Mai. It seems very unbelievable. 

Chay does not appear to be convinced either, but he's not a hardened medical professional who has seen a lot, he is Porsche's kid brother and the only reason he knows what it looks like when someone has been beaten up is... Porsche does not want to think about this any longer and feels like a failure at the same time. 

"You must be hungry", he interrupts to pull Chay's thoughts away from the conversation. 

"I am!" Chay agrees whole-heartedly. If there is one thing Porsche can still count on ever since Chay has turned thirteen, it's that he will be ravenous. 

Unfortunately for Porsche though, Chay is no longer so distracted by food that he forgets everything else. He gets himself a plate and then sprints upstrais. Kinn's gaze follows him, clearly amused but also questioning. 

A minute later, Chay returns with their old, trusty emergency kit. Kinn gives him a look like he cannot believe Chay is serious, but Porsche knows from experience that his little brother is not to be trifled with when it comes to tending to injuries. 

"Your hands first", he says with so much determination, that even Kinn does not dare to refuse. Or maybe he is just humouring Porsche's baby brother. That might be it as well. 

Chay goes to work, diligent as he has ever been for Porsche, cleaning up the area and then wrapping the gauze around it in practised moves. Kinn looks at his bandages and flexes his fingers to test the hold. It holds. Of course it does. 

"You're pretty good at this", Kinn points out and Chay beams. 

"Of course I am, I got to practice on...", he stops himself and then his words falter altogether. He shoots Porsche a small look. Porsche just shrugs. There's no use in pretending like Chay did not gain all of his experience from patching Porsche up and patching him up often.

"I am the luckiest guy in this city", Porsche says and ruffles his little brother's hair. "I got the best doctor right here. Doctor Mai can suck it."

"Hia", Chay moans and seems embarrassed. Kinn is not, but he's also not laughing. His eyes are dark and impassive on Porsche who squirms away from their gaze. Damn Kinn and being too blunt. Can he not let Porsche hide an uncomfortable truth behind humour for once? Would that kill him? 

Probably. 

To get them back to safer grounds, Porsche plates their food and gestures for Chay to get on with the wound treatment. 

The bruises on Kinn's face are all closed and other than an ice pack wrapped in a towel, there is really not much to be done for them. So Chay hands Kinn that with strict instructions to change it after twenty minutes and also make sure that the packet never touches his skin directly. 

Kinn nods solemnly and way too serious again and Porsche is almost, almost sure that he is taking the piss out of his little brother now, but as always, it's so hard to tell with Kinn. 

"Thank you, Porchay", he says when Chay cleans up his supplies. "You'd make a fine doctor one day. We couldn't have anyone better at the compound."

Porsche wonders what he means by that: the compound. Maybe that's what Kinn calls his company. Rich people have ridiculous names for all kinds of things, don't they? 

"Absolutely not", his little brother says with vehemence, as if Kinn just greatly insulted him. "I am not going to be a doctor." He says the title like it's an affront. "I want to be a musician, just like P'Kim!"

Porsche, like any good guardian, cringes at those life plans. But he comforts himself with the knowledge, that Chay is still so young and there is still so much time for this pipe dream to die. He does not have to be a spoil-sport about it just yet. Once Chay is a little bit more grown up, he will understand that money is needed to pay for most everything in life and not just the things Chay is aware of now.

Then he will stop considering music a viable career and pursue something more realistic. Not necessarily becoming a doctor, though Porsche will admit that the thought does fill him with pride.

But he is a realist. He could never afford to put Chay through medical school. The tutoring alone would drive him out of of hearth and home. No, Chay, like many low-middle class children, will have to content with something a little less glamorous and more tedious.

Porsche hopes that at least, his little brother will be happy, whatever he ends up doing. If Chay does not have to risk his safety to pay the rent, if he gets to work in a quiet, boring office, Porsche will consider it a job well done. 

He can feel Kinn's eyes slip over to him and he just shrugs. So Kinn smiles and says: "Of course you will. Just talk to Kim if you need some connections."

The crazy thing is, Kinn is probably serious about this and Kim might even do it: Help a budding musician out. Because he is just nice like that.

Well.

Sometimes.

Porsche can admit that Kim, who seems lukewarm at best about most people, is very nice to Chay.

Still, that’s his baby brother and Porsche does feel some type of way about that. But it could be far, far worse than a dainty singing idol, so he won't complain too much and count his blessings.

Chapter Text

It's after school and Porsche expects Chay to be home. Who he does not expect sitting at his kitchen table is the country's biggest up and coming idol. On second thought, maybe he should start though. Kim has been nothing but nice to Chay and Porsche's little brother has taken advantage of it by inviting him over constantly. 

What surprises Porsche is that the older boy keeps taking him up on it. 

By now, Porsche has been at Kim's, or rather, Wik's place, several times and it's a lot nicer than their run down little house. So much nicer, in fact. It has all the amenities anyone could ever want and then some Porsche did not even know existed. Yet, Kim prefers to hang out here. 

He's like his brother in that regard. 

Kinn's home probably has all the nicest things too. That thought is followed up by the bitter realisation that Porsche wouldn't know because Porsche has not been. 

Unlike his brother, Kim has been more than happy to have Chay in his place, whereas Kinn still freaks out every time Porsche even glances in the direction of his private life. It's... hard not to take that personally. Porsche wishes he'd get an explanation because all the ones he is coming up with on his own are pretty terrible. 

"Hey Porsche", the idol greets him and pulls him out of his musing. 

"Hey Kim", Porsche says and goes into the kitchen to put away the groceries he bought for their dinner – luckily, enough to make three meals. "Where's Chay?"

"Upstairs, he's just getting some stuff."

"What stuff?"

The idol shrugs and Porsche puts away his food. The silence between them is not exactly uncomfortable, this is Porsche's home, after all, he refuses to be made to feel like a guest in his own kitchen, but they don't have a lot to talk about.

Kim has always been very clear on who he is here for. Other people might get offended, but honestly, Porsche cannot stay mad at anyone being enamoured with his baby brother. He gets it. Chay is the politest, sweetest, nicest kid anyone has ever met and Porsche is not just saying that because he is massively biased. Everybody likes Chay. So it would be hypocrisy to be mad at Kim for preferring him to Porsche, who is not everybody's cup of tea. Which is fine! Porsche has two lives to run, he can’t be likeable all the time or he’d never get anything done.

Also, a small part of him murmurs, Kinn likes him enough for the whole country. It's a heady realisation and it's a constant source of warmth, knowing that there is someone out there who is always, always happy to see him. No matter what time of day or night. Whether Porsche has something interesting to tell or if his day has been the most mundane, Kinn listens to him as if Porsche is telling him the secrets of the universe. 

He likes Porsche. 

Really, genuinely likes him. 

Which makes his shifty behaviour so much harder to understand. 

"Hia!" Chay calls from the stairs, his tone happy and bright as always.

"Don't fall!" Porsche immediately responds as he sees his little brother descend with his arms full of, well, stuff. Kim was right on that front. Chay carries what looks like all his school supplies plus a random assortment of books and folders he managed to find. It's all piled into a precariously into his arms, forcing him to awkwardly peak around it as he takes one step at a time.

"Please don't fall, that's your laptop", Porsche says as he spots the black little rectangle. He cannot afford to buy Chay a new one and Chay needs a laptop for school. That much became clear to him when his baby brother would spend hours in the library, not because he loved books so much, but because he needed the equipment to write his papers. 

Porsche felt very bad and called Jom right that very evening. 

Chay, the laptop and all the other things reach the end of the stairs in one piece and he sets it down in front of Kim. 

"Here you go", he says with the brightest smile. 

Kim eyes his things. Porsche eyes Kim. What on earth does an idol want with his little brother's rickety laptop and his, Porsche tilts his head, yep, that is Chay's tenth grade maths book.

"All of this?" Kim asks sceptically.

"Please!" Chay responds with vehemence and looks expectantly at the idol. Kim nod, gets a big silvery marker out and starts signing things. 

"Chay", Porsche says and it's meant to be admonishing, but honestly, he's incapable of being angry with his little brother. Even if he pulls antics like these.

"What?" Chay wants to know, obviously fully on board with what he is doing and considering it all very normal. "It's not hurting anyone – bigger, please, P'Kim, thank you – and that way, I have something nice to look at in class."

Porsche shakes his head and leaves them to it. 

"Would you like some coffee, Kim?"

"No", the idol says, almost on autopilot, then reconsiders. "From that machine Kinn bought?"

"If you want."

"I'll take some then."

Chay immediately springs into action. "I'll do it! You keep signing." He taps a folder and Kim dutifully scrawls his, or rather Wik's, signature all over it in a messy, loopy sprawl. Chay coos at the signature. 

With great effort, he manages to turn away from his favourite person and towards his big brother. "Hia, show me how to?"

And so Porsche shows him how to operate Kinn's starship style coffee maker so he can impress the boy he likes.

Kim stays until Porsche has hinted at the clock three times. Even then, he does not fully catch on.

"I know what time it is." Kim shoots him a confused and slightly annoyed look.

"Oh, do you", Porsche says with his friendliest customer-service smile. "I wasn't sure. You know, since it's a school night and all that."

"Do you want me to leave?" Kim hazards a guess.

"No!" Porsche's little brother interjects immediately. "Of course not, P'Kim. You can stay the night!"

Porsche shoots him an incredulous look before turning back to the idol. "Yes, I think it would be good if we called it a night now. Chay has school and I have a shift."

Kim narrows his eyes at him. 

"You're leaving?"

"That is usually how jobs work, yes."

"And Chay will be all alone here?"

Porsche sits up a little big straighter. "Chay will be in bed, sleeping. Like you should too, you know."

Kim looks deeply upset by something but he does get up and ready to leave. Of course, it still takes another twenty minutes for the boys to say goodbye. 

When Chay finally steps away from the front door and Kim has left the house, the sun is setting. Porsche can't even be mad about it though. It's his baby brother's first crush and it's cute. Porsche has no desire to ruin that for him. 

"What all did you get him to sign?" Porsche wants to know.

Chay's whole face lights up. "Oh, my laptop and all of my work books for school. I had all of his CDs signed already but I asked him if he could add a personal note and he did!"

Of course he did. Porsche guesses that there is fairly little that Kim would not indulge Chay in. That's no necessarily a good thing, but as his big brother, who is also terrible at telling Chay no, Porsche does not really have a leg to stand on. 

Porsche reaches out and wraps an arm around him, squeezes him close. That's when he spots a bit of silver paint on Chay's wrist. He takes it in his hand and pulls it up.

To his surprise, Chay immediately tries to snatch it back. Which is an odd reaction since Chay has not yet reached his I am too cool for affection stage of teenage-hood (and Porsche's heart will break when he is no longer allowed to cuddle his little brother as much as he wants to). 

"Chay. You did not", Porsche says while knowing with painful certainty that his baby brother very much did.

"I didn’t", Chay lies, terribly, as always. "I did not ask P'Kim to sign my arm. What? Why would you even think that? I think I want some more dinner."

Porsche gives him a flat look for his terrible attempt at distraction, but he does let him wriggle out of his grip.

"Well, I suppose the one good thing is that you just increased the worth of all your junk, should we need a bit of cash in a pinch."

Chay makes an absolutely outraged little noise.

"Never!"

It's late, or rather early morning after his shift and Porsche almost does not spot the shadow, hunched down just outside their gate, half hidden behind a suspiciously unsuspicious black car.

Porsche walks over, half expecting one of Kinn's bodyguards there. Maybe even Kinn. Porsche is dead on his feet, but he would like to see him. There will never be a time when Porsche will not be happy to see Kinn. 

It's not Kinn.

"Kim, why the hell are you outside my house at ass o'clock in the morning?" Porsche is not usually this rude to Chay's friends, not even the rich, famous kind, but he is very tired and he does not have time for any more of the idol's ridiculousness. 

"I was just around", the idol says and Porsche does not even deem that ridiculous lie worthy of an answer. 

"Kim."

The boy looks to the side, his mouth set in a stubborn line. There is something very young and very entitled about him that makes Porsche's big brother heckles rise. Maybe he is spoiled because Chay is literally the best little brother ever, but Kim is giving him migraines. 

"Go. Home." He says, stern. "Get some sleep, you are behaving ridiculously."

"I was just making sure nothing happened."

Porsche doesn't quite get it. 

"What do you think is going to happen."

Kim gives him one of those looks, the ones that Porsche wants to smack right off his smug face. Like he thinks Porsche is shy of a few marbles. 

"To Chay. He is all alone in there. Which, by the way, he should not be."

"Oh not this again." Porsche is tired, but trust Kim to find a way to get his blood pressure rising and the adrenaline pumping. "If you are going to insinuate that I cannot protect my own baby brother again, I will-"

"But you don't", the idol interrupts him. "He's all alone in there. Anyone could have wandered in and stabbed him."

"Stabbed him?!" Porsche echoes, alarmed. "Why would anyone stab Chay?"

"Because there are bad people in this world, Porsche", Kim says like he is not several years younger and almost a head shorter.

"Thank you for that valuable insight", Porsche snaps through gritted teeth.

"I think I should be allowed to stay over when you are gone on night shifts", the idol says like that is a completely normal thing to suggest. "Or Chay could come stay at mine. That would be preferable anyway, my place is bigger and also, the AC-"

Porsche turns around and leaves him standing on the street before he does something his baby brother will not forgive him for. Like punch his favourite pop sensation in his smug little mouth.

~°~°~°~

"You're here often", Porsche remarks. They are standing in the kitchen and he's showing Kinn how to slice onions. It's obvious that Kinn has never done this before, but he does know his way around a knife at least, so he's not completely hopeless.

Kinn looks up from his work, his eyes a little red and teary, but his smile is bright. "I like being here. It's easy. You're easy."

"Oi!" 

"I did not mean it like that", he corrects himself, then his smile turns sly. "Though I wouldn't mind if you were."

Porsche swats at him with the towel. Kinn laughs and lets it happen.

"Go chop your onions, onion boy", Porsche says. "You said you're hungry, so we're trying to make dinner here." Porsche has a shift later tonight and he already knows he’d rather not go.

"I wouldn't mind having desert first", Kinn hums and moves towards him. Porsche swats at him again but he does not protest when the other man pulls him in with a warm hand against his neck. Kinn kisses him on the base of his neck and Porsche shivers, tilting his head forward to make room for him. 

Kinn hums in appreciation. The knife clatters to the cutting board, dinner preparations forgotten as Kinn steps closer to nose along Porsche's neck and leave kisses and little bites there. It feels incredibly good. 

"No hickeys, please", Porsche manages with some difficulty. 

"Why not?" Kinn wants to know. He sucks at the spot where Porsche's neck flows into the curve of his shoulder. 

"Bad for business", Porsche answers honestly and then yelps when Kinn bites down. "Ow, what the fuck!" This time, it's not a playful swat. He pushes Kinn back and rubs at the spot. It's still tingly, sensitive from Kinn's sharp teeth. This will definitely bruise. Porsche glares at him. 

"You possessive fucker."

Kinn just shrugs. "Sorry", he says, not sounding sorry at all.

"There is not a single sorry fibre in your body", Porsche accuses him. Kinn flashes him a bright smile full of teeth.

~°~°~°~

Porsche is doing some much needed home clean up. He doesn't know how it happens, but shit just keeps getting dirty. He can't remember how often he has scrubbed the kitchen counter in his life. Thousands of times, probably. And today, he is scrubbing it again. 

Chay is sitting at the kitchen table, taking a little break from vacuuming the entire lower floor. He's scrolling on his phone when he suddenly makes a choked off little noise. It sounds like he can't breathe properly and Porsche is immediately concerned.

"Are you okay?"

"Fine!" Chay squeaks, his voice pitching up in ways it hasn't since he hit puberty. Porsche frowns at him. Then he frowns at the phone.

"What are you watching?"

"Nothing!"

Porsche puts down the sponge and his hands on his hips.

"I know you are lying", he says flat out and then marches over. Chay hastily flips his phone upside down so Porsche cannot see the screen. He couldn't be more suspicious if he tried.

Porsche has seen enough. He takes the phone and punches in Wik's birthday. Chay goggles at him.

"How did you...?"

"Who else would it be? Your loving brother who raised you lovingly for the last fifteen years?"

The remark falls flat. Chay just blinks up at him.

Porsche looks at what Chay looked at last. It's a little video clip of Wik. Porsche can't say he's surprised. Someone has put suggestive music over Wik walking from one end of the stage to the other. The video is in slowmo and seems to be focussing on Wik's hips.

Chay snatches the phone away and cradles it to his chest. He's very red around the ears and he glares at Porsche.

"You wouldn't understand."

Porsche does not. When he was Chay's age, Porsche reserved that kind of reaction for videos of pretty people with decidedly less clothes on. But trust his little brother to get flustered over what Porsche couldn't even describe as the softest of soft porn. It's barely a thirst trap, if he is honest.

But watching Wik walk across a stage to slow music surely makes his brother feel some type of way. Honestly, Porsche would almost prefer Chay to just watch regular porn. That, at least, he'd understand.

He doesn't know what kind of warning talk to give about Wik on stages. He'd like to say that it's all fake, but unfortunately, Kim actually does look like that. And apparently, those looks keep his little brother up at night.

"Go vacuum upstairs", Porsche says since he doesn't know how to address... well, any of this.

Chay does not need to be told twice. He jumps out of his chair and runs upstairs. Though there is no vacuum starting up since that is still standing on the kitchen floor next to Porsche.

Porsche sighs and goes back to his never ending battle against housework.

~°~°~°~

“Happy Birthday, favourite baby brother!” Porsche shouts and jumps on the bed. For once in his teenage years, Chay does not moan and groan and try to wiggle back under the covers. He blinks up at Porsche, still bleary eyed but already smiling.

“Morning, hia. Thank you, hia.”

Porsche hugs him, tightly. Chay is sleep-warm and limp in his arms. He’s also grown a whole year over night, it seems. Just yesterday, he fit comfortably under Porsche’s arm and now Porsche has to use both to wrap around him. What happened to his perfect little brother?

Chay hugs him back and buries his face against Porsche’s shoulder and that, at least, has not changed.

After a long, good birthday hug, Porsche finally lets him go and gives him the sunniest smile.

“Get ready, there’s cake downstairs.”

“Did you make it yourself?” Chay asks wearily.

Porsche clicks his tongue. “Not this time. I love you too much for that.”

He climbs out of the bed and makes his way to the door. “But I’ll start without you, so you better get going.”

Chay makes an outraged, raspy gurgle. “You wouldn’t!”

“Thank you, they’re great!” Chay exclaims as he’s putting down his new uniform shirts. They are fresh off the press and crispy clean. He’ll look just like the other kids and Porsche is so pleased.

“There’s one more”, Porsche says and pushes a small box towards him.

“Hia, you shouldn’t have. These are more than enough.”

“Give me some credit, I am not going to get you only sensible gifts. Where’s the fun in that?”

“I like sensible gifts”, Chay reassures him, but the way his eyes light up when he picks up the necklace with the little guitar pendant tells Porsche that he made the right call when he decided to get him something a bit more extravagant. It’s not real silver, but it looks close enough. Made from some sort of special steel that supposedly does not rust.

“I love it!” Chay squeaks and then hurries around the table to hug Porsche and also make him put the necklace on Chay, which he more than gladly does.

Chay fiddles with the pendant and grins from ear to ear.

“You’ll look so cool for the new semester”, Porsche says and his little brother nods eagerly.

Chay graciously shares his birthday cake with Porsche and they squabble over who will do the dishes after (“Not me, it’s my birthday. That’s against the law!” “The law, eh? Fine, birthday boy. Consider it an additional gift.”).

Porsche clears the table while Chay diligently smooths out the wrapping paper and bands to be used again. Outside, the birds are chirping and someone’s honking in the early morning traffic.

Honking rather insistently. Insistently enough for both Chay and Porsche to stop what they are doing and go to the door to see what’s going on.

There’s a familiar black car outside. And a baby blue BMW out of which Kim is currently climbing, waving towards them, or rather, Chay.

Meanwhile, Kinn has gotten out of his car, a giant bouquet of flowers and two big bags in hand.

Chay shoots Porsche a questioning look, but he can only shrug.

Kinn is the first to reach them. “Happy birthday, Porchay”, he says and claps a broad hand on Chay’s shoulder.

“Thank you, P’Kinn”, Chay answers dutifully, but it’s clear he’s only half paying attention because Kim is coming towards them and like always when the singers is around, everybody else becomes background noise to Porsche’s little brother.

“Happy Birthday, Chay”, Kim says. He opens his arms a little bit and starts to move towards Chay, only to pull back. He remains unnaturally rigid. Chay watches him with big eyes and Porsche notices that he’s holding his breath.

Kim looks torn for a moment, then he visibly comes to a decision and finally wraps his arms around Chay. Who stops breathing altogether, going eerily still. Porsche can see him mouth ‘oh my God’.

Right before Kim is about to awkwardly pull back again, Chay awakes from his shock and clamps both arms around the other boy, hugging him as tightly as he can.

Kim makes a little sound as the air is pushed out his lungs. Porsche decides to give them some privacy and joins Kinn in their kitchen.

By the time the boys are finished, Kinn has made himself a cup of his disgusting coffee and Porsche is pulling out an extra set of plates and forks for the cake.

Chay is absolutely enamoured with the singer and trails after him like a love sick puppy, but he’s still teenager enough to take notice of the two giant, sparkly golden bags on their kitchen table.

He’s too polite though to approach them until Kinn says: “For you. I hope you like them. I am not sure what is in right now, but I had some high quality help.”

“You shouldn’t have, P’Kinn”, Chay says because Porsche raised him right and he’s a polite kid. Not polite enough, though, to not immediately start tearing into his gifts. It’s more than he’s ever gotten in his life. In all his birthdays combined, actually.

Porsche makes room for expensive sweaters and brand name sports gear, a new smartphone with matching noise-cancelling ear phones. Chay’s eyes are almost as big as his birthday cake.

“Is this really all for me? Are you sure?”

“Of course it’s for you, it’s your birthday after all, isn’t it?”

Chay nods in agreement and Porsche takes his ratty shirts and the little box the necklace came in and shamefully hides both under the table with all the wrapping paper.

He watches his little brother have the kind of birthday Chay has always deserved and feels like he’s breaking in two.

Porsche tries to keep it together, but his smile is wobbly and strained around the edges. He’s just lucky that Chay is so drunk on an excess of gifts and Kim’s general presence that Porsche can blend a little into the background.

He feels terrible and like the biggest fraud for not being happier for his little brother.

What does it matter who gives it to him as long as Chay gets the world?

But it matters.

Watching Kinn and Kim provide so easily what Porsche could not even if he never slept a day in his life again makes something raw and miserable claw up his throat.

He excuses himself by feigning an early clean up shift at Hum Bar. Chay’s a little sad but immediately perks up when Kim says: “Let’s check out your car.”

Normally, Porsche would have something to say about that. For example, how Chay is two years away from even thinking about sitting behind the steering wheel of any car, let alone a custom painted luxury vehicle like the one he’s passing in the drive way, but he needs to get out of here before he says or does something to ruin his little brother’s birthday.

“Porsche?” Kinn calls after him but Porsche does not turn around. He’s on his bike and off before the other man gets to him.

Tap.

There’s a sound against his window.

Tap. Tap. Tap.

With a groan, Porsche gets out of his bed to see what is going on.

What is going on is Kinn, standing on Porsche’s dried up lawn, palm full of pebbles, looking ridiculously out of place, as always. His face lights up when Porsche opens the window.

“What are you doing?”

“I am being romantic and adorable. Is it working?”

Despite his better judgment, a laugh bursts out of Porsche.

“Ridiculous is the word you are looking for.”

“Ridiculous and adorable”, Kinn concedes, “I’ll take it. Come down?” He just about manages to make it sound like a question and not an order.

Porsche believes in rewarding effort and not two minutes later, he’s standing in front of Kinn. The other man’s gaze feels like a touch, travelling from Porsche’s flip-flopped feet over his naked legs all the way up to his clavicle.

“You look cosy.”

“I was in bed.”

“Hmm, you should let me tug you back in.”

Porsche feels warmth spread from his chest all the way down to his stomach and lower. Which feels a little inappropriate, so he presses his legs together and fixes Kinn with an unaffected look. “Was that the reason you came all the way over here?”

“No”, Kinn admits after a moment, slipping a finger into Porsche’s sleep shorts which is highly distracting. “But now that I think about it, it’s a better reason.”

“What was the less good original reason then?”

The other man lets out a deep sigh and then withdraws his hand. They migrate towards the porch swing, Kinn sitting very close to Porsche, his leg pushed against Porsche’s from knee to thigh, expensive cloth against skin. It feels nice. Comforting. Kinn’s presence is always comforting, so Porsche leans into him.

“I’m glad you’re here”, he admits, quieter than he usually talks, but in the summer night’s silence, Kinn still hears him loud and clear.

“I’m glad I came then.”

Porsche smiles at him and Kinn smiles back. For a moment, Porsche is convinced that the other man will lean in and kiss him, which would be very welcome. Instead, Kinn slings one arm around him and pulls him even more firmly into his side.

Porsche lets himself be hugged and leans his head against Kinn’s shoulder, nose pressed up against the spot between neck and back where his cologne and the warmth of his skin is strongest. Porsche inhales and closes his eyes.

“Will you tell me what went wrong this morning?” Kinn asks, voice soft and very close to Porsche’s ear.

Porsche’s heart plummets into his stomach and he jerks away. Kinn’s hold on him tightens, dragging him back in and then just keeping him there, pressed against Kinn’s familiar body. Porsche’s first and overwhelming instinct is to free himself and play the whole thing off with a laugh. Maybe tempt Kinn into a late night drink and then let him tug Porsche into bed like he suggested.

Most likely, it would even work. Porsche knows what effect he has on people, on Kinn.

“I don’t really want to talk about it”, he admits.

“Very well”, Kinn says and doesn’t even sound mad, “I’ll tell you what I learned then and you can tell me whether there is some merit to the idea or not.”

Porsche worries his lip between his teeth. “What idea?”

Kinn takes a breath and hesitates for only a second. If Porsche wasn’t so close to him, he might not even have noticed. “It has been pointed out to me that I might have behaved a little bit… insensitive today.”

Porsche blinks up at him. “Who dares point out such things to you?” Not that they are wrong. But Porsche would have thought that, given Kinn’s position, he’s not exactly surrounded by people who give them a piece of their mind.

“My brother-“

“Kim?!” Porsche interrupts because that seems just so unlikely. That Kim of all people would notice anyone being insensitive. Maybe, maybe he might try for Chay. Maybe. But definitely not for Porsche.

“God no”, Kinn says with as much vehemence as Porsche felt. “Of course it’s not Kim.”

“You have another brother?”

“Have I not told you about Tankhun yet?”

Porsche shakes his head and a small part of him cannot help but sting. There is a whole other brother. Probably more of Kinn’s family that he’s not even mentioned to Porsche. And, most likely, Porsche not to them.

He pulls himself away from thoughts like these. It takes effort, but Porsche does not want to dwell on them right now. Also, they are talking about something else that might just be equally important.

“Well, he’s quite something. Anyway, I have been informed that I might have been overstepping when I crashed your little brother’s birthday with a credit card’s worth of gifts.“

Porsche squints at him, suspicious. “You’re not wrong. But I am amazed to hear that your brother, who I take it is also insanely rich, pointed this out to you.”

Kinn gives a deep sigh. “It might not have been just Tankhun. He’s got friends. Well, bodyguards, but the way he treats them is more like friends. Which is reckless and – not the point right now. It was one of them who suggested I was out of line.”

“I am amazed any bodyguard of yours feels comfortable enough to say that to your face.”

It’s a joke, but Kinn seems oddly hurt by it. “I listen to my people.”

“I am sure you do”, Porsche is quick to soothe him and doesn’t mention Kinn’s rich boy ways again. “And your brother’s bodyguard was right. I did feel a little… pushed to the side maybe.”

Kinn’s hold on him tightens. “You know that nobody can take your place when it comes to Chay, right?”

“Theoretically, yeah, I know that. But watching you and Kim give him everything he wanted, everything he should have, things that I could never give him no matter how hard I worked and how much he deserves them, it stung.” He pauses and kicks at a bald patch of lawn with his flip flops. “I know it’s stupid. I should just be happy he’s getting all the gifts he deserves. What does it matter where they come from.”

But the thing is, it does matter. To him, it matters. Which probably makes him a horrible older brother.

“I’m sorry about the clothes and the smartphone”, Kinn says. “And the ear pods and the watch.”

“And the car”, Porsche interjects.

“Come now, he’s sixteen, he needs a way to get around.”

Porsche gives him a very flat look. “He’s not even allowed to drive that yet.”

Kinn laughs like Porsche just said something funny. When it becomes clear that Porsche is not in on the joke, Kinn clears his throat. “Right, it’s against the law.”

“Not so fond of that, are you?” Porsche teases.

Kinn gives him a small smirk. “On the contrary, the law and me are very well acquainted.”

Porsche has no trouble believing that. Running a big company and investing in a whole bunch more probably comes with all sorts of legal hurdles if you want to do things right.

“The car is too much. And way too impractical. Also, sitting outside on the street, it will just get damaged or, more likely, stolen.”

“You should put it in the garage, of course”, Kinn agrees.

Porsche points at the gate, then his house, then back at the gate and the yard in general. “What garage, Kinn?”

The other man turns his head and looks at the house and garden like he is seeing it for the first time. “Oh. Well. We could build-“

“You should take the car back”, Porsche interrupts him before he can finish that sentence with more ridiculousness.

Kinn huffs.

“You take the car back”, Porsche repeats, slower this time.

“Fine”, the other man relents. “But Kim won’t be happy about it.”

Porsche remains wholly unimpressed by that threat. “Luckily for me, I am not that afraid of the pretty idol.”

“He looks very harmless”, Kinn admits and is smiling that little smile again. “Also, Chay is not too young to drive a bike.”

Porsche hits him. And because Kinn does not expect it, he succeeds.

“Do you want to get stabbed? Because this is how you get stabbed.”

The other man laughs and rubs at his shoulder. Porsche hopes it smarts!

“You wouldn’t dare-“

Porsche abruptly gets up. “I am getting a knife, right now!”

“Wait, wait”, he’s laughing harder now, one hand wrapped around Porsche’s and dragging him back down. “No bike. I promise, no bike.”

Porsche gives him the stink-eye but he does let himself be pulled back into Kinn’s side. “I am watching you, Theerapanyakun. Like a hawk.”

“Please do”, Kinn smirks. “In fact, you should be watching only me. Preferably from your bed.”

Chapter Text

It’s too early to be up, but recent developments in Porsche’s personal life have brought with them a morning person. It’s a testament to the hold the other man has on him that Porsche bothered to get up at the ungodly hour that is seven.

He has just handed Kinn his first coffee, fresh from the chrome monstrosity living on Porsche’s kitchen counter.

Kinn takes a sip and looks up at him. He’s beautiful in the early morning light, for once dressed down in Porsche’s old clothes. He looks soft and approachable in a way he never does in his sharp cut, blood red suits.

“You truly are a marvel”, Kinn says and Porsche can feel his cheeks grow hot.

“I am?”

“Hm. This”, he points to the coffee maker, “is a fully automated machine and you still managed to give me this swill.”

It takes Porsche half a second to catch on, then the shy smile drains from his face to make room for a more outraged pout.

“You!” he slaps Kinn over the head. Not as lightly as he maybe should have. The other man just laughs. “You can go make your own coffee from now on then.”

“That would probably be best for me”, he agrees, like the jerk he is.

Porsche moves to slap him again, but before his hand can make contact, Kinn catches it and presses a kiss into his palm.

The gesture is so sweet and so ridiculously romantic that Porsche does not stand a chance. He feels the mock-outrage drain from him and he doesn’t put up a fight when Kinn pulls him closer. He wraps two strong arms around him and pushes his face into Porsche's stomach. Porsche can see and feel him take a deep breath. It's second nature to run his fingers through his hair. Kinn hums and if he was capable of it, Porsche just knows he would purr. 

Fingers slide over the plain cotton shirt Porsche is wearing and push it up. He can feel Kinn's breath and then his mouth against his naked skin. He's pressing butterfly kisses along Porsche's stomach, but it does not take long before the kisses get more persistent and wetter. 

Kinn licks a long, hot stripe over his hipbone and Porsche makes a noise that is not appropriate at all for early morning breakfasts. He can feel Kinn smile against him before he does it again, his arms tightening around Porsche's waist, pulling him closer and holding him still. 

"Wait", Porsche mumbles, common sense rapidly abandoning him.

"You don't really want me to wait", Kinn says, dragging his teeth low over Porsche's stomach.

"Okay", he pants, "maybe. But we can't. Chay...", might come down here any minute.

Kinn sighs, long and deep, like he is the one who has to miss out on a blowjob, but his arms grow lax around Porsche and he lets the shirt fall back down to cover his spit-slick skin.

"Very well." He looks up at Porsche and smiles. "But we really should take this trip. And soon."

Half-hard in his pants and so in love that it hurts, Porsche agrees with every fibre of his being.

~°~°~°~

It's another late shift for Porsche, which means that he comes home in the early morning hours. He expects Chay to be in bed, fast asleep. Instead, there's light coming from the living room.

Porsche is ready to give his little brother a very stern talking to about school and the importance of being well rested, but when he steps inside, he sees that Chay has not stayed up all night to watch reruns of Wik concerts, as has happened before.

His little brother is , in fact, sleeping. And so is Kim. They are on the couch, curled up around each other. Whatever programme they had originally been watching has obviously long since ended, replaced by an endless add about some magical kitchen appliance that is supposed to make cooking faster, easier, healthier and tastier for the low, low price of what Porsche brings home in a week.

Porsche approaches the boys, contemplating whether to wake them up or not.

He should not have bothered worrying because the moment he is within reach, Kim's eyes snap open. He glares up at Porsche, one hand going to the back of his trousers, the other pulling Chay's unconscious body closer to himself. 

Then the idol blinks, that eerie alertness replaced with the sleepy confusion Porsche would have expected from someone who has just woken up.

"Oh", the idol says, his voice rough from disuse, "it's you." He yawns and looks around. "What time is it?"

"Five thirty", Porsche says. 

"Crap", Kim mutters. "I didn't mean to fall asleep."

"It's okay", Porsche soothes him. "From what Chay tells me, your schedule was super hectic these last few weeks. You must be exhausted."

Kim frowns at him.

"That is no excuse", he says; it sounds rehearsed. Porsche knows very little about being an idol, nothing, really. But even he has heard about abusive managers. Is that why Kim is so harsh on himself for succumbing to very normal human needs?

The singer rubs at his eyes and tries to sit up, but immediately freezes when Chay makes a snuffling noise and buries closer to him. The way Kim looks at him is so unbearably soft that Porsche feels like an intruder witnessing it.

"Get some rest", Porsche says. "I'll see you in the morning."

Maybe he should wake Chay and tell him to go sleep in his room. Maybe he should kick Kim out and tell him to go sleep in his own bed. But the reality is that they have already spend most of the night together down here, so really, what's a few hours more.

As much as Porsche thinks that his little brother is too young to be sleeping in the arms of anybody, really, he cannot deny that Kim has treated him with nothing but adoration. If Chay has to date anyone, Porsche would prefer he dates someone who looks at him like Kim does.

It feels like Porsche's head has barely hit the pillow when there's a commotion downstairs.

Still half asleep, running on nothing but adrenaline and the protective instincts of an older brother, Porsche stumbles down the stairs. It's light outside, so he must have slept some, but it can't have been much.

"Ey, Kittisawat, asshole!" Someone yells and Porsche recognises that voice.

He hurries to make it to the living room.

To no surprise, but his great displeasure, Porsche finds Ohm and his goons standing inside. They have woken up the boys with their commotion. Chay looks sleep-ruffled and scared. Kim seems surprisingly calm for someone who has just been woken up by a bunch of violent goons. His face is very blank. Maybe that's just the way he displays fear, Porsche thinks. He doesn't miss the way Kim has placed himself between Chay and the intruders.

"It's only Friday", Porsche says as he skits to a halt, putting himself in front of both boys. Ohm gives him a smile that is all teeth.

"I missed you, asshole."

Porsche wants to sneer at him but does not. It's four against one and he has his little brother and his little brother's little friend to protect. He really, really does not want this to turn violent. 

"Well, now you've seen me. I will come by later, okay?" Porsche puts on his sweetest customer service smile. It works on the debt collectors from time to time. Today is not such a time. 

"Don't get cute with me", Ohm snaps. "I came all the way here, I want my money. You can pay up now or after we've beaten the shit out of you and your little brother."

There's movement behind Porsche. He's surprised to find that it's Kim. What is he doing? He shouldn't be here in the first place. Porsche hates that he has to see this. Also, Kinn is going to be so mad at him for getting his little brother involved in his shit.

Kim crosses the room, bafflingly calm for someone just witnessing a shake down. Porsche, of course has now idea what Kim's life looks like, but all the clues point towards both himself and his brother always having had money. So Porsche doubts that this is a familiar occurrence for the idol.

Kim goes to retrieve his leather jacket from the sofa and pulls out his wallet. He takes what looks like all the bills from it and hands them to Ohm, who just stares. 

"Now piss off", he says as he does it.

Porsche wants to smack him. Does he not know not to agitate dangerous men? Even if he has no personal experience with them, Porsche feels like that should just be obvious. Apparently, not in Kim's world, because he gives Ohm a look that is so haughty and so insulting that Porsche cannot even fault the guy for taking a swing at Kim.

The idol steps out of his fist's reach in a way that makes it appear like Kim barely moved at all, but he is safely those few millimetres away so the attack does not land. His haughty look turns downright murderous and Porsche quickly steps between them, physically pulling Kim behind himself. Which takes a little more force than he anticipated because the idol refuses to let himself be moved, the stupid idiot. But in the end, he goes.

"Chay", Porsche says in his sternest big brother voice. "Go upstairs and take your friend with you."

"Yes, hia", comes the subdued reply. Chay sounds exactly as young as he is and scared. He tugs at Kim's hand to pull him upstairs with him but the singer does not budge. 

"You go", he says to the younger boy, "I'll come got you when this is settled."

Porsche wants to snap at him that a) they very much both need to go and b) if anyone is going to collect Porsche's little brother when the danger has passed, it is going to be Porsche!

But there are more important things to deal with right now than Kim's utter lack of social skills. 

Luckily for all of them, Ohm has forgone a second attempt at Kim’s pretty face in favour of counting the money. It's a lot. Far more than he would have gotten from Porsche on a regular day. Porsche realises the mistake Kim has made when the goon looks up at them with a greedy glint in his eye.

"That's not enough", he says.

"Like hell it isn't", Porsche tries to intervene, but Ohm is not looking at him, he's looking at Kim.

Chay's favourite person.

Kinn's little brother.

If Kim gets hurt in Porsche's house, he will never forgive himself. And he won't be able to look Kinn in the eyes ever again. He let him install all those security measure to keep his baby brother safe, an impulse Porsche more than understands. Only for Porsche's shit show of a life to put him in danger anyway.

"That's all the cash I have", Kim says coldly, not at all perturbed by being stared down by a gangster, low-level as Ohm might be.

"That's a very nice ring you've got there", Ohm says casually. Porsche looks down at Kim's hand. He does have a ring. It's a bit big for his slender fingers. Also, it looks familiar. 

Then it hits Porsche where he has seen a ring just like this: on Kinn. 

He flashed it when he ordered the host of the street fight to declare Porsche the winner. Porsche thought the whole thing odd at the time and with all their fighting afterwards, he did not get around to asking Kinn how the hell he pulled that off, a stranger just coming in and calling a fight.

"You want this ring?" Kim asks, his tone betraying nothing. "Are you sure about that?"

Ohm scoffs at him. "Yeah, pretty boy, I am fucking sure about it. You can either give it to me or I'll come and take it."

Porsche is not ready to have a fight in the middle of his living room with his little brother watching his favourite person get beat up. Kim really should not start things he cannot finish.

So he is kind of glad when Kim gives Ohm one last withering look, then he takes off his ring and hands it over. The debt collector weighs it. It must be heavy. Which probably means that whatever it is made out of is the real deal.

Porsche feels utterly terrible about all of this. There is no way he can get it back from Ohm. Kim just lost what seems to be a family heirloom under Porsche's roof. Porsche is the worst host and guardian in the entire city of Bangkok, not only incapable of keeping his little brother safe, but also his guests.

"Pleasure doing business with you", Ohm says, a smug, oily smile stuck on his lips. Kim just looks at him, face completely blank. Porsche can't even tell if he's scared or upset about losing his ring. "What are you staring at", the gangster snaps when he gets no reaction from the singer. 

"Just making sure I remember your face", Kim says in that flat tone of his. Neither Porsche nor the gangster know what to make of that and so Ohm leaves it at shoving Porsche against the door before leaving. Porsche takes it without putting up a fight, just glad to see them go.

Once they are out of sight, he rushes to lock the door. Then he turns to the boys, his hands flitting all over them.

"Are you okay? Did they hurt you?"

"No, hia", Chay says dutifully while Kim squirms out of his worried touches.

"I'm fine, stop being dramatic", he mumbles. Porsche does not think he is being dramatic, he thinks he is showing the appropriate amount of worry for this kind of situation. He gives Kim a quick check-over and accepts his hands being slapped away when he tries to reach for his head. True to his word, the singer seems fine.

"I've got to call Kinn", Porsche says once he is sure nobody has been stabbed and is silently bleeding out.

Kim frowns at him. "Why? I handled it."

Porsche frowns at him. "Because his little brother just got mugged under my roof. I am sure he wants to be informed about something like that." Porsche knows he'd want to know if anything happened to Chay while he was away.

"Kinn doesn't care", the singer scoffs.

Porsche refuses to even dignify that insanity with a response.

Just like Porsche expected, Kinn does care.

He cares so much that he leaves whatever no-doubt important business meeting Porsche just called him out of and is at his doorstep in less the thirty minutes. Which, given the city's heavy traffic, is a truly impressive feat.

"Are you okay?" Kinn wants to know. He looks good in a dark red suit with so many buttons undone that Porsche has an unobstructed view of his chest. He has to pull himself together to not let himself be distracted by all that skin. Kinn's reaching out to touch Porsche's face, his head, his shoulders. Porsche recognises the need to check with your own hands that no major damage has been done and so he lets Kinn touch and prod and finally hug him so tightly it's a little hard to breathe. 

"I'm fine", he reassure him. "I'm fine. And so are your little brother and Chay, by the way."

Kinn pulls back, looking a little sheepish. "Right, Chay. I'm glad he's fine."

"And Kim", Porsche repeats.

"Of course Kim is fine", Kinn says and carries on before Porsche can find that odd: "How did this happen?" 

"Look, I didn't know they'd come today. The payment shouldn't have been due for at least another two days. And I didn't know Kim would be staying the night." Not that that is any sort of excuse. If Kim had not been here, Chay would have been alone down there. ... then again, if Kim had not been here, Chay most likely would not have slept on the couch instead of his own vastly more comfortable bed. 

Still. Kim got robbed under Porsche's roof so he has no right to be upset with him for unknowingly putting Porsche's little brother more in harm's way than necessary.

"Who is they? And why are ‘they’ breaking into your home to rob Kim?"

Porsche really, really does not want to tell him but now that he accidentally got his little brother involved, Kinn probably has a right to know. 

"Okay", Porsche says, "okay, I'll tell you. Just...", please don't look differently at me, he wants to say and then does not. Because what right does he have to demand that of Kinn? "I have an informal loan."

If he's surprised or disapproves, Kinn does not show it. Instead, the same eerily impassive expression that Kim's had during the robbery settles over his familiar features.

"Those were debt collectors. I usually pay them every Monday after my more lucrative weekend shifts or the fights. I have no idea why they decided to come by today. Maybe they were in the area. I am really sorry that your little brother got involved."

"So this is a reoccurring thing", Kinn says. "These people breaking into your house and threatening you."

"Collecting on the debt", Porsche corrects him. "It's fine. Usually, I can make sure Chay is not here and it's just me. This was just extremely bad timing. I'm sorry."

Kinn frowns at him. He's probably mad. Porsche would be mad if Chay got robbed under someone else's roof. But when Kinn reaches for Porsche, his hand is warm and gentle, cupping his face. Porsche lest out a shivery breath and a weight he was not aware of is lifted off his shoulders. Kinn might be mad, but he's probably not breaking up levels of mad.

"Why do you keep apologising?"

"Because I should have done something to stop them", Porsche says, "because your little brother was a guest under my roof. Because you paid for all these security measures to make sure he would be safe when visiting Chay and he still got robbed."

"Is there anything you could have done?" Kinn asks gently.

"I... maybe. But the boys were right there and I didn't want the situation to escalate. I couldn't have made sure they were safe and fought of four guys at the same time." Rationally, Porsche knows that very few people could. He still feels like a failure. "I'm so sorry this happened." 

His apologies are so inadequate, but they are all Porsche has. 

"Then you did everything right", Kinn says kindly and pulls Porsche in again. Desperate for some reassurance, Porsche lets himself be comforted, even if he doesn't deserve it. "How much do you owe them?" Kinn wants to know, but Porsche just shakes his head against his chest. 

"Can we please drop it for now? Please." He can hear Kinn take a breath as if to argue so Porsche repeats: "Please."

Kinn breathes out, long and controlled, then he nods and wraps his other arm around Porsche. It feels so good to be held like this and hide his face in Kinn's neck. It's quickly becoming Porsche's favourite place so seek solace.

"You're shaking", Kinn mumbles into his hair.

" 's just the adrenaline", Porsche mumbles. "All this happened after I'd just gotten home from a night shift. I am operating on like, two hours of sleep."

"Then lets get you back to bed", Kinn suggests. Porsche stiffens against him.

"I don't want to sleep when you're here." He wants to spend time with Kinn. With how busy he is during the day and how hectic Porsche's nights are, they do not get to spend as much time together as Porsche would like. Kinn chuckles and then presses a kiss to his temple while using his superior bulk to march Porsche back up the stairs and into his room. Not that Porsche puts up much of a fight.

"I promise I'll be here when you wake up", Kinn says as he puts him back in his bed. Porsche clings until the other man relents and gets in with him. Kinn arranges a pillow behind his back so he can more comfortably sit against the headrest and gets out his phone, clearly settling in for the long run. Porsche drapes himself all over him.

Kinn is very warm and his heartbeat very steady against Porsche's ear. Porsche is exhausted from the fear and the adrenaline. Kinn's fingers carding through his hair do not help either. He is just about to drift off to sleep when he hears Kinn ask: "What did you say the same of the collector was?"

"Ohm", Porsche mumbles. "But I didn't..."

Kinn puts a hand over his eyes to block out the sun. "Go to sleep, Porsche."

If Porsche was worried about this changing things, maybe even costing Chay his newfound idol friendship, he should not have been. Kim hangs out at their house exactly as much as before, maybe even more. Porsche might even consider it too much, but his presence makes Chay ridiculously happy and while Porsche still finds Kim a little weird, a little unnerving and socially awkward to the point of tipping over into rudeness some days, he also gets used to the gloomy singer.

It's during one of those visits that Porsche spots something on Kim's hands.

"Hey, isn't that the ring Ohm took?"

Chay looks up from his homework with a frown. Kim hides his hand under the table. A move that makes him look strangely guilty. Porsche is just not sure of what.

"I don't know what you are talking about, I have many rings."

Porsche frowns at him. "I am pretty sure that's the same ring."

Kim goes quiet for a moment and Porsche can literally see the thoughts forming in his head. Then the singer sighs and pulls his hand out from his hiding spot.

"I have several copies", he says. Porsche, of course, has no way of determining whether that is the truth or not, but somehow, he doubts it. He is about to investigate further, when Kim, clumsy, tips his glass of lemonade over and the whole table is swimming in soda.

"My homework!" Chay squeaks and jumps up, trying to save what is already a lost cause. Porsche hurries over to the sink to get all the towels.

"I am so sorry", Kim says as he slowly pushes back his chair, soda dripping onto his designer trousers. He helps them clean up.

Chapter Text

It’s another Kittisawat-Theerapanjakul breakfast and Porsche is rapidly getting used to these. It’s nice, having company.

The four of them are gathered around Porsche’s kitchen table, sharing the food Kinn brought. Chay is nursing a cup of coffee taller than his head. Not question about who provided that (for Chay only, though that’s fine, Porsche doesn’t like coffee, even if it comes with enough sugar to kill anyone over the age of twenty).

"You need a new door", Kim says out of the blue.

Porsche frowns at him. "What? Why?"

"Because those people were able to just waltz in here. With Chay sleeping on the sofa. You need a new door. And new windows. And bars on the new windows."

Porsche scoffs. "We are not putting bars on the windows, new or old. This is not a prison and our door is fine."

The idol puts down his coffee (normal-sized). "But it's dangerous. Why won't you just listen?”

His insolence is starting to tick Porsche off. "Because there is nothing wrong with our door. Let it be."

"It's old. It's faulty. It takes me less then two seconds to undo the lock." 

Porsche frowns. "What?" But Kim is already continuing: "Chay was asleep. Alone. What if next time they come, I am not here?"

Porsche is silently seething. This is not what he agreed to. This was supposed to be a nice breakfast, not... whatever this is turning into. A run down of all the ways he has failed Chay, perhaps. Conducted by someone who could be his little brother as well. Only that Kim is nothing like Porsche's actual little brother. He possess neither Chay's sweet temper nor his care for other people. 

"You can think whatever you want, it's still our house, so none of your business."

"But Chay is my business", Kim argues back. Next to him, Chay makes a little cooing noise, though he has been looking back and forth between the two of them with mounting trepidation. Porsche wants to be happy for him, he truly does, he knows how much it means to his baby brother that his favourite idol is worried about him. Porsche just wishes it would not have to come at the price of him feeling inadequate. 

"Kim, drop it", Porsche says, tone carefully controlled. 

"No! Why won't you just get a new door?"

"Because a new door is currently not in my budget!" Porsche bites his lips. Damn. That was not... he did not mean to tell him that. Especially not in front of Chay, who looks mortified on his behalf. Porsche can feel his face heat up. To cover his shame, Porsche begins shovelling food into his mouth.

"If you wanted a new door, I could-", Kinn starts but Porsche shoots that down before he can even finish his offer.

"No, thank you. Our door is fine. Everything in our house is just fine. Stop trying to change anything." Porsche has thoroughly lost his appetite by this point. He gets up to dispose of his plate, Kim hot on his heels.

"But it is not! It's dangerous. Don't you care?"

"Kim", Kinn says in a low voice. When his brother looks at him, he gives a minuscule shake of his head.

"P'Kim, maybe we can go... maybe you can show me that chord again? The complicated one."

"In a moment", Kim says and his tone is markedly milder before he turns back to Porsche. "How can you not care that Chay is in danger. Why is your stupid pride more important than his safety?"

Porsche wants to slap him. 

He doesn't, because he generally is not in the habit of slapping people, especially people who are smaller and still somewhat fall into the category of his little brother's little friends. But, God, does he want to!

Surprisingly, he does not need to. 

"P'Kim, enough!" Chay has gotten up and shoved the idol away. Something that would have been unthinkable two minutes ago, Chay putting his hands on Kim in any way but adoration. He looks very upset, almost close to tears. Porsche wants to comfort him. He puts a hand on his shoulder. 

"Chay, it's fine. Nothing happened."

"It's not fine!" his little brother says and there's a slight wobble to his voice. "It's not fine and you need to apologise!"

Porsche is about swallow his pride, anything to appease his little brother, but surprisingly, that last part was not directed at him. Kim is staring at Chay like he's seeing him for the first time. Like he too cannot believe what just happened. Then he gets that stubborn, constipated look on his face that tells Porsche he's going to say something stupid. 

"Fine. I'll apologise." Okay, not what Porsche expected. "But only for the way I said, not for what I said." Ah. There it is. "And you know I'm right." That last bit is directed at neither Porsche nor Chay but Kinn, who has been sitting very still at the table and just sighs now that his little brother is dragging him into it.

"Nong, you have the worst negotiation skills", he says, not unkindly. It still manages to piss off Kim even further. 

"Because it's not a negotiation. Chay's safety is non-negotiable!"

"I can't listen to this", Porsche says, putting his unwashed plate in the sink and getting out of the house before he says or does anything that he cannot take back. He doesn't give a single fuck about Kim's feelings in all of that (well, maybe that's not entirely true, but he's just so mad at him right now, Porsche might just forget that he does not actually want to hurt the idol), but he knows that any strike again Kim will inevitably also land on his little brother and that is unacceptable. Porsche would never force him in a position where Chay feels like he has to take a side. Mostly, because Porsche, despite Chay's star-struck adoration for the singer, is pretty sure that he would still win that fight. But only at the cost of Chay's happiness and his own pride will never be worth that. 

He's not really surprised when Kinn joins him a few moments later. He still has his coffee with him and a glass of water for Porsche. In his anger, Porsche did not really notice, but it's warm out here and he is kind of thirsty.

He takes the offering with a sigh. "Is this a poisoned glass of water?"

"What?" Kinn says, almost affronted. "No, of course not."

"You sure? You're not here to tell me that your little brother is right and security as our place is still lacking and it's my fault the debt collectors were able to get in so easily and what if Chay truly had been alone? Because I think about that all the time."

Kinn sighs and then sits down next to Porsche on the bench. He wraps an arm around his shoulder and pulls him in. Porsche fights for a moment, but Kinn does not relent and eventually, it's just easier to give in. 

"You're a great big brother", Kinn says. Which is not what Porsche expected him to say. 

"I'm trying, I guess", Porsche mumbles while he feels his eyes growing hot. 

"I know. Chay knows that too. And so does Kim." At Porsche’s doubtful little scoff, he repeats: "He does."

"But?" Porsche asks after a moment. "I can hear a but coming on. There is a but in here somewhere."

"I like the way you say butt", Kinn grins at him. All of six years old. Dork. "You should keep saying it."

"Your little brother is an ass, actually."

At that, Kinn outright laughs. "He is."

"I'm not getting a new door."

Kinn sighs, like he did not expect anything else. "It's your decision."

"Yes, it is!"

It's the end of his shift. It's been a slow night, so Porsche closed up shop earlier than usual, which is why it is still dark outside when he gets home. Which is why he almost falls over Kim.

Who springs up and into action, hand shoved down the back of his pants before recognising Porsche.

"Oh", he mumbles, "it's you."

"Yes, it's me. The person who lives here. The question is, why are you here? Do you know how late it is?"

Kim blinks up at the night sky and then pats down his pockets for his phone. 

"Don't bother", Porsche says, "it's not even half four. Why are you here, Kim?"

The boy gets that constipated look again. "You had a shift."

"Yes, and?"

He hesitates. When he continue, it sounds like the words are being forced out of him one by one. "And Chay was all alone. I had to...", he trails off.

"Make sure nothing happens to him?" Porsche guesses. The idol just nods tiredly. "Then why are you out here and not in there with him?" Chay is hopefully long asleep, but Porsche knows he would be ecstatic if he knew his favourite singer was out here, holding some sort of very misplaced vigil over his safety. 

Kim is quiet for a moment, the pinched look on his face becoming even more pinched. Then he looks Porsche in the eye. "After our last conversation, I did not think you'd want me here without you knowing."

"Good guess", Porsche admits. Things are tense between them for a moment, but of course, Porsche cannot stay mad at someone for wanting to protect his baby brother. Even if they trample all over his own feelings in the process. Porsche sighs and then wraps his arm around the boy to drag him inside. "Come on, let's get you into bed."

Kim does not really put up a fight, but he's hesitant. "But I need to-"

"You need your beauty rest. I won't have your manager coming after me because their star idol shows up with bags under his eyes." 

Kim frowns and mutters: "They wouldn't dare to complain."

Entitled little shit.

Porsche guesses that once you've reached a certain level of fame, you get to behave like that and people will let you get away with it because you can sell stupidly overpriced skin-care.

Porsche puts Kim in his own bed and then crawls into Chay's to spend the night there. If Kim has any thoughts on the arrangement, he is smart enough not to share them with Chay's older brother.

"Hia?" Chay grumbles when Porsche lies down next to him. He's not really awake and Porsche shushes him.

"Go back to sleep, you still have two hours left."

"M'kya", his little brother mutters and then flops over to drape the blanket over both of them and rest his head on Porsche's chest like he used to when he was much younger. Porsche wraps one arm around him and holds him close.

Porsche has had a solid two and a half hours of sleep before Chay gets up and wakes him in the process. 

"Sleep, hia", he says but Porsche sits up.

"I'm awake, I'm awake", he says. "It's fine." Then he smiles at his little brother. "Morning."

Chay beams back at him. "Good morning!"

When they get out of Chay's room, they run into Kim. Freshly out the shower, in just a towel. Chay makes a little choking noise, Porsche sighs. 

"P'Kim!" his little brother squeaks,  eyes glued to an errant drop of water that slides down Kim's abs.

"Right", Porsche says, "Kim is here", and then to the idol: "Put on a shirt. Take whatever you find in my closet."

Kim nods but his eyes are trained on Chay. Eventually, he does turn around though and wanders back into Porsche's room. "Not the black button down", Porsche yells after him, "I need that for my shift tonight."

Kim joins them at the breakfast table in one of Porsche's washed out shirts and a plain white pair of shorts. Everything is comically oversized on him. Porsche would like to say that he looks almost like a normal person without his fashionable outfits, but the truth is Kim still looks like an idol. Just one in a poor man's wardrobe. 

"When did you get here?" Chay asks, almost breathless with joy.

Kim's eyes flicker towards Porsche. Porsche is not sure if he's looking for help or permission and so he just gives him a quick smile.

"I was in the neighbourhood and ran into your brother", Kim says. Which is, technically, not a lie. The phrasing in the neighbourhood just does an awful lot of heavy lifting.

Porsche would have loved to know what Kim's plan was if something had actually happened. Porsche, at least, knows how to fight. Kim looks like his muscles are for looking good in photos, not punching debt collectors in the throat. He probably would have paid them off again.

Chay accepts that explanation easily. He does not have a whole lot of time to dwell on it anyway because it's time to get ready for school.

"I can drive you", Kim offers immediately.

"Your car is here?" Porsche asks.

"Well, I did not walk here, did I?”

Sassy little shit.

Who still comes here to ineffectually guard Porsche’s baby brother when he has a much nicer loft on the other side of the city.

I like your home , Kinn had said, it contains you.

Apparently, Kim feels the same, just about Chay.

Chay leaves them to go take a shower and then get dressed.

While he's upstairs, Porsche cleans their dishes and is surprised when Kim gets up to help him. He goes about cleaning the dirty bowls like he's never held a sponge in his life. Who knows, maybe he hasn't. Maybe he's been a pretty, spoiled brat all his life, even before he became famous. 

"I", Kim starts and then shuts himself up. Porsche gets a towel to dry the dishes and keeps quiet. Sometimes, you’ve got to let people figure out what they want to say while they are speaking. Just give them time. Porsche is a very good listener. It comes with the job. "I wanted to say... thank you, I guess."

"You're welcome, though I want that shirt back, it's one of my favourites."

Kim looks down at the shirt, obviously surprised. It's grey with a washed out ugly pink print. Kim's too polite to say anything about it, just: "I did not mean the shirt."

Porsche could let him suffer some more.

"I know", he says instead, letting the younger man off the hook.

Emboldened by his success, Kim continues: "I also wanted to say sorry. About the thing with the door."

Porsche raises his brows in mock-surprise. "I did not know that word existed in your vocabulary." 

The glare is immediately back on Kim’s pretty face. "Fine. I take it back. Your door sucks, so does your ugly shirt." Porsche whips him with the towel. “Ow!"

"You", Porsche says, finger pointed at Kim, "need to be nicer to me. You used my shower, ate my food and now you are wearing my clothes. Stop treating me like I'm your underling or I will kick your ass and when your brother tries to get involved, I will kick his ass too."

Kim seethes and for a moment, it looks like he won't back down. But then the fight drains out of Kim.

"I'm not good at being nice", Kim allows. 

You don't say, Porsche wants to retort and then doesn't because that won't actually help. Instead, he smiles. "Well, luckily for you, my brother is the country’s leading expert on being nice. Too nice, maybe. I am sure he can show you a thing or two."

As if summoned, Chay appears in the kitchen, now in uniform, backpack slung over his shoulder.

Porsche hugs his little brother goodbye.

"Be good."

"I'm always good, hia."

"Then be better. Listen to the teacher, don't do anything I wouldn't do. Actually, don't do ninety per cent of the stuff I would do either."

Chay laughs and hugs him back. Then he shyly loops his arm through Kim's and pulls him out of the door.

Porsche watches them go with fondness.

To his immense surprise, Kim returns a little over an hour later. Chay will be safely in school by now, being a better student than Porsche ever was. Porsche expected the idol to, well, he's not sure what an idol does all day, but surely Kim is busy with something. And be it filming thirst traps for his fans.

Instead, he's standing on Porsche's door step, still in Porsche's too big clothes.

He carrying a giant bag that he holds out to him when Porsche opens the door. 

"What is this?"

"I know people usually give flowers to apologise. But... I never heard you express an interest in flowers and also, I think me giving you flowers would be weird."

"Yes. Thank you Kim, for not giving me apology-flowers. That would have been extremely weird." Porsche opens the bag and peaks inside. All he sees is a lot of black fabric. "So, what's this?"

"For the shower and the food and the clothes and... for letting me crash in your bed last night." Kim sounds angry as he says all that. Then again, Kim sounds some sort of pissed-off most of the time. The only gentleness Porsche has ever seen him employ is with Chay,; not counting the Wik persona, which Porsche is pretty sure is ninety-nine per cent fake. 

Porsche pulls on the fabric and it turns out to be a black button-down. "Oh", he says, pleasantly surprised. It looks simple enough, even if Porsche is fairly sure that it's a nicer material than the cotton polyester blend he usually buys. In any case, he's not familiar with this brand. "This is actually useful." It's in Porsche's size too.

"I thought, because you said you needed the one for the shift, that you might...", Kim trails off with an angry scowl and Porsche takes pity on him. He looks very young and very out of his element.

"Thank you, Kim. Thank you for the apology-shirts. You don't need to buy me apology-shirts, but it's appreciated."

Kim huffs a sigh that sounds a lot like relief. 

"Good", he say with a curt little nod. "I'll go then. I have a shoot this afternoon."

"I'm sure Chay will tell me all about it."

It's close to twelve and Porsche is crashing hard. He's running on two and a half hours of sleep and he's tired. He has another shift tonight and the house desperately needs vacuuming. He should also go to the market at some point, see if he can get a couple of good deals. Instead, Porsche is lying on their couch, looking at all the things that demand his attention and just feels... exhausted.

His phone rings. The display lets him know that it's Kinn an a little zing of happiness shoots through him, making feel more alert already.

"Hey, stranger", Porsche says.

On the other end, Kinn gives a little chuckle. "What are you doing?"

"Trying to become one with the couch while ignoring all the more important things I should be doing."

"You could become one with me while ignoring those", Kinn suggest and Porsche rolls his eyes, but he can feel blood rush to his face. 

"What a lame pick-up line", he accuses. "Is that the best you can do?"

"How about I pick you up for lunch and then show you the best I can do."

Porsche is amused, embarrassed and more than a little aroused all at once. But he's also still very, very tired. "Sorry, I'm just... I don't really want to go out right now."

"Oh", Kinn says, disappointment clear in his voice. He recovers quickly: "Another time then."

"I'd still like to see you", Porsche quickly adds. "You could come over? I'm not much in the way of company right now but...", he does not have to explain any further because Kinn immediately says:
"I'll be right there."

He hears the door slide open.

"Over here", Porsche says and lifts a hand to wave in Kinn's direction. Two seconds later, the man steps around the sofa, looking impeccable as usual in a dark grey suit. "How do you not melt in these things?" Porsche wants to know.

"Years of training and very good antiperspirant", Kinn replies and takes off his jacket. He sits down next to him and Porsche flops into his lap. Almost immediately, there's a hand in his hair, gently carding through it and it feels so good Porsche could purr.

"You gotta stop that", he tells him. 

"Why? You're enjoying it."

"Because I will fall asleep on you."

Kinn does not let up with his gentle touches. 

"Then sleep", he says, like it's that simple.

"But I've got so much to do."

Another hand joins the first one and travels from his hair, over his forehead to his eyes, staying there, warm and dark and soothing. "Sleep, Porsche. You can take care of things later."

It's such a tempting offer and Kinn is so warm and he smells so good and he's comfortable and Porsche really is just so tired. "Wake me in two hours, okay?" he mumbles.

"I will", Kinn promises.

Porsche should not. He has so much to do. He falls asleep with Kinn's hand in his hair and his warmth pressed against his cheek.

Someone's touching his face and it's unbearably soft. Porsche sighs and goes completely still, wanting those touches to continue. There's a warm chuckle above him. 

"I can tell you're awake."

"'m not", Porsche protest and nudges his face more firmly into Kinn's palm. Kinn indulges him. There are movements behind them, people walking in the kitchen. Porsche grows a little more alert. "Who's here?"

"Nobody", Kinn soothes him. "Just bodyguards. I ordered you some groceries."

Porsche sighs. He also wants to cry because that's one thing less he has to worry about today and Kinn cannot possibly know how much that means.

"You didn't... you don't have to do these things", Porsche still says because it feels like the right thing to do. 

"I know. Trust me, I am very good at not doing things I don't actually want to do."

Porsche can see that. He imagines Kinn in a room full of other smart business people, making sure he gets the best deal. He's probably very good at it. Valuable for his company.

"Yeah, I bet you take nobody's shit."

Kinn laughs, it's quiet but it sounds fond. "I'm not in the habit, no. Now go back to sleep, you still have twenty minutes."

Porsche does not really go back to sleep, but he dozes, listening to the sound of Kinn's men mulling around and then it's back to the silence and just the steady beat of Kinn's heart. Porsche has never been with someone like this. His usual encounters are quick and rushed and nobody has the time or desire to fall asleep in anybody's arms. In a lot of ways, Kinn is a novelty. 

"You always do these nice things for me", Porsche says, eyes still closed. 

Kinn gives a questioning hum and stops whatever he's been typing out on his phone. 

"The groceries. And the money. And the food, you always bring food."

"I can't show up empty handed", Kinn says, "what a terrible guest I'd be."

Porsche smiles at that and hides the flush by turning his face further into Kinn's stomach.

"My point is, you do so much and I can't pay you back."

"Porsche", Kinn says and it sounds admonishing. Good thing Porsche is not currently looking at his face. He can feel Kinn shift and lean down to peer at his face but Porsche is stubborn and refuses to turn his head. So he gets a kiss on the ear instead of wherever Kinn originally planned on. "You have no idea how much you have given me."

"Very mediocre dinner?" Porsche suggests.

He expects Kinn to laugh but the other man does not acknowledge Porsche's, admittedly fairly lame, joke. "You are the best thing that has happened to me all year."

Porsche goes still. And warm all over. "Kinn", he protests.

"All decade."

"Kinn!" Now he is looking at him, ready to... Porsche does not know. Tell him that's too much. That he's wrong about Porsche. That Porsche is barely keeping his life together and his little brother fed, clothed, in school and out of trouble. His life is a mess. And sometimes dangerous. A dangerous mess. Surely, Kinn is surrounded by much better people all day every day. People who are poised and successful and smart, just like him.

"Don't freak out", the other man says. It doesn't do much to keep Porsche from freaking out. "I know you are not ready to hear it, so I'll wait until you are to tell you how much I love you."

Porsche stares at him. And then, completely unbidden, his eyes grow very hot and his face gets all stupid and tight. Kinn looks startled, then concerned and then Porsche can't see him any more because he's turned back into his stomach and is hiding from him. 

"Why are you crying?" Kinn whispers, alarmed. 

"I'm not", Porsche denies and does not hiccup. "Who's crying, you're crying."

He cannot see but he can feel the way Kinn shakes his head. Then there are hands on his shoulders to pull him up. Porsche is not ready to face him but Kinn is persistent and Porsche does not really want to fight him. He ends up more or less in Kinn's lap and the urge to hide his face against his neck is strong.

He doesn't get to do that because Kinn takes his face between his hands and pulls him in for a kiss. It's deep and long. Not as filthy as some of the kisses that they have shared before, but very heart-felt. Porsche still feels off-kilter when they pull apart.

"I won't tell you either", he says.

Kinn goes very still. He seems shocked for a moment, before a smile blooms on his face that is so wide it has to hurt.

"Works for me", Kinn says, painfully controlled but his voice is still cracking around the edges.

Chapter Text

Another Monday and Porsche is waiting for Ohm to collect on this week's payment. He's made sure that Chay is safely away, having a sleep over at one of his friend's. Apparently, nobody informed Kim because when Porsche goes to answer the knock on his door, it's not Ohm and his goons, it's Thailand's hottest new idol, looking disappointed when he spots Porsche through the window. No doubt in Porsche's mind about who he would have rather seen.

"Chay's not here", Porsche says instead of a greeting. Kim frowns.

"Why not? Where is he?"

"With friends."

Kim's frown deepens. "What friends? He didn't tell me about any friends."

Porsche thinks he's ridiculous. "Just a boy he met in his music after-school program."

Kim narrows his eyes at Porsche. "What boy? I need a name and an address."

"What you need is to relax", Porsche tells him. Like hell is he going to give Kim this poor family's address. He'll probably drive straight over there to crash Chay's sleep-over. "Chay needs to have friends other than you."

Kim seems bewildered by the idea. "What for? I can give him everything he needs."

Porsche does not doubt that. He may not like it, but when it comes to material things, Kim probably can. Even more reason for Chay to hang around some normal kids his age, not up and coming superstars with low social skills.

"I'll wait here", Kim determines. Without consulting Porsche, of course, because this, apparently, is Kim's house now.

"No, you're not." Ohm could show up any minute and Porsche will not have a repeat of last time. He absolutely does not want to call Kinn and tell him that his little brother had a run in with seriously bad people in Porsche’s home again. No way. "Also, Chay won't be here until tomorrow after school."

Kim stares at him, seemingly shocked. "He's staying at another boy's house over night?!" He sounds so outraged about it too. Porsche just shakes his head at this behaviour.

"He's having a sleep-over with a friend. I am sure you're familiar with the concept."

Kim hesitates for a second, then he nods. "Of course I am", he says haughtily. "I still don't think it's safe for him to just sleep in a stranger's house."

"Pravit is not a stranger, I've met his parents."

Kim's eyes light up and Porsche realises his mistake. He grabs Kim's arm before the idol can fully turn around. Kim is more muscular than his slender frame would lead you to believe. He is also glaring murder at Porsche, but Porsche is very good at ignoring little brothers.

"Whatever you are planning, do not ruin this for my little brother, you hear me?"

Kim presses his lips together until they are fused into one bloodless line. "I am not doing anything", he says. "I'm just making sure he's fine."

"He's fine, Kim", Porsche says, stern. "And you need to let him have other friends."

"Kinn does not let you have other friends", Kim argues back like that is a) an argument for anything when it comes to Chay or b) true.

"What the fuck", Porsche says because really, that is the only appropriate reaction to a statement like that. "I don't ask Kinn when I get to hang out with my friends."

Kim squints at him like he does not really believe him. "Okay, but when did you last see them?"

Embarrassingly, Porsche has to think about that for a second. He invited Tem and Jom round to enjoy all the extra food Kinn brought a couple of weeks ago, because of course Porsche shares when something good happens to him. But since then... he might not have gotten around to hanging out with them again. So much happened, it sort of slipped his mind.

Not that he is going to tell Kim that.

"I see them all the time", Porsche says and vows to make that a reality by calling them right after Ohm has picked up this week's payment. "Now, leave."

"Why, want to get rid of me?"

Porsche rolls his eyes at him. "No. But the debt collector is going to come around soon and I am sure you don't want to lose another ring.”

Kim scoffs like the very thought is ridiculous. “That won’t be an issue anym-“, he cuts himself off abruptly, his eyes darting towards Porsche. “I should go.”

Porsche just watches his odd behaviour with resignation. By this point, he has given up on trying to figure out what makes Kim tick.

At the door, the idol stops.

“Chay won’t be back tonight at all?” he wants to make sure one more time.

“I’m sure he’ll be more than happy to see you tomorrow. Ecstatic really. And Kim?” Porsche has not even said what he needs to say, but Kim’s already frowning at him in that disgruntled way he has. At least he is listening. “Don’t text him to ask him out tonight. Let him have this.”

The frown deepens until it’s an outright sulk. In the end though, Kim gives a curt nod. Then he leaves.

Porsche waits around another hour, but the debt collector refuses to materialise. Fine, if Ohm won’t come to Porsche, Porsche will just come to him. Later, because this is a little brother free afternoon and he has invited Kinn to make the most of that.

The most of that really means: Kinn is staying the night and Porsche is a mess. Not only because his home feels completely inadequate all over again but also because, well, there is the tiny matter of Porsche maybe not having a ton of experience with men. And by that he means none. There have been no men in Porsche’s life so far. Not for lack of interest, he’s gotten plenty of offers. But going behind the bar with a man he barely knew never seemed like a wise decision. The women were all smaller, equally as beautiful and with them, Porsche didn’t have to embarrass himself by showing his lack of knowledge.

With Kinn, it’s different. Kinn is so comfortable in his pursuit of Porsche that Porsche bets he doesn’t need to worry about not knowing. And while it’s probably good that at least one of them has a handle on things, it also ups his anxiety. Kinn obviously has people to compare him to. What if Porsche is bad at it? He probably will be, he has no idea what he’s doing.

Well, other than the kind of idea everybody with the same plumbing sort of has.

“What wrong?” Kinn asks from somewhere behind him and Porsche almost drops the bowl of popcorn.

“Nothing!” he says too loud and too quickly.

Kinn’s brows draw together. He’s lounging on Porsche’s couch in what he’d probably consider casual wear. He’s still the most expensive thing in this house.

Porsche walks over to him and sets the bowl down, but when he moves to sink into the cushions next to him, Kinn is pulling at him until he’s halfway straddling his legs. Porsche blinks down at him, both enamoured and anxious, which is one hell of a combination.

“You know I’m not expecting anything, right?” Kinn says and Porsche flushes a violent red.

“I have no idea what you are talking about.”

Kinn is kind and doesn’t call him out on the terribly obvious lie.

“Well, good. I was just making sure you knew. Carry on.” He drags Porsche all the way into his lap and then nods towards the bowl. “Feed me.”

Porsche slaps his shoulder. “What are you, some sort of king?”

Kinn just hums. “Close enough. Now, get to it.”

If he knew Porsche at all, he’d be more careful about trying to order him around. Porsche takes a huge hand-full of popcorn and then shoves all of it into Kinn’s face. Some of it gets into his mouth but most of it lands on his shirt, in the deep v-neck and all around them. Kinn sputters and tries not to suffocate.

“You”, he growls, but not even Kinn can look menacing surrounded by popcorn and on Porsche’s ratty couch. He surges up and tries to flip them but he’s forgotten that Porsche does this for a living every other weekend. Not getting pinned by opponents who are heavier and likely stronger is one of the first lessons he learned. And so he goes with the flow of Kinn’s playful attack, giving it more momentum then Kinn probably intended, and topples them both off the couch.

“Ouf”, Kinn says as his back his the carpet and Porsche lands on top of him, one hand braced against his chest, the other pinning Kinn’s right arm to the floor. It’s warm and Porsche can feel all the muscles there flexing. It’s intriguing.

“Do you give up?”

“Sure”, Kinn says easily but there’s a glint in his eye that reminds Porsche to stay vigilant. He is proven right when Kinn uses his long legs to basically trap Porsche between them and then rolls them. There’s little Porsche can to against it. They grapple with each other until Kinn puts a hand on his throat, not pushing down, but the threat is clear.

“Yield”, he says.

“Never”, Porsche immediately shoots back.

Kinn leans over him until he’s blocking out everything else. He’s still out of breath and a little ruffled and Porsche cannot stop staring at him. This might be the least composed he has ever seen him. It’s beautiful.

Kinn leans down and bites at Porsche’s lips. “Yield”, he demands again.

“Nuh uh.”

Another bite, this time to the neck. Followed by lips. There’ll be a bruise there tomorrow. Porsche cannot wait to further agitate it by poking at it in front of a mirror.

Kinn’s palm is resting against the side of his face, dry and warm, cradling him. There’s a thumb slipping between Porsche’s teeth and he bites. Kinn just laughs. “Yield”, he whispers again, his lips so close to Porsche’s now.

Porsche releases his thumb to better mumble: “Okay, maybe. A little bit.”

He gets a kiss on the lips for that.

*~*~*

It's a familiar way, the route to the debt collectors, a dreaded one. At least, he has cash in his pocket. Things don’t go as terribly when he is able to pay. Still, it’s an unpleasant and often frightening affair.

He knocks and is let into the nondescript little store. From the outside, it looks like the most out of date restaurant, but no local is dumb enough to try to get a meal here and the few tourists who wander into these back alleys are put off by the peeling paint and overpriced menu. It's all very deliberate.

The same grey-haired woman as always lets him in. Porsche guesses that she is one of the goon's grandmother. She's far from a sweet old lady and Porsche has never had any illusions about her. If her books aren't correct, she will send the people to collect. Early on, when he was younger and dumber, he thought he could reason with her. Lot of good that did him.

"Kittisawat, Kittisawat", she mumbles as her spindly finger moves down the long list of entries. Porsche spots his name before she does. It's crossed out and the letters KAT are scribbled next to it. Porsche has no idea who KAT is. He does not know any Kats or Kates. By now, the woman has found it too. She frowns at his name, at him and at the crumbled notes he's holding out to her. "Are you messing with me, boy?"

Porsche blinks. "No?" he says carefully. It's never good to upset these people and he honestly does not know what he did wrong. He's even here early and with the full amount, courtesy of the extra cash he got from Kinn. It is an unfortunate truth that money really does buy happiness. Or at least, it can prevent a shit load of misery. 

"Get out of my house", she snarls and snaps the book shut with the finality of a judge. Porsche is completely bewildered as to what is happening. "Out, out! I do not appreciate being tested. You let that vile man know so, you hear me?" Then she physically pushes him out the door. 

Porsche stands there, money in hand, looking like an idiot. He quickly puts it away before he draws any unwanted attention. Still baffled by what just happened, Porsche leaves the dark little alleyway and gets back to his bike.

Was this all because he was a day early? Should he come back tomorrow? He'll be in trouble if he doesn't pay up. Porsche very much does not want to be in trouble with the debt collectors again!

He checks his phone. To his surprise, he has three missed calls. All from Kinn. Three calls in a row cannot be good. Usually, Porsche prefers to text, like a normal person, unlike Kinn, but this seems important, so he calls him back.

Kinn picks up on the first ring.

"Where are you?" he says in lieu of greeting. He sounds tense.

"Just...", Porsche looks around him. The ratty back ally, the run down not-a-restaurant. There's no way he's telling upper-class Kinn where he is or why. It's bad enough that Kinn knows about the debt in the first place. "Out. Why, what happened?"

"Just out", Kinn echoes. He sounds so doubtful that Porsche looks around again, half expecting to find him leaning against one of the spray painted walls. But of course, he doesn't. There's no reason for someone like Kinn to be in a place like this.

"Yeah", Porsche repeats lamely. "Just out. Now, why did you call me?"

The silence on the other end feels heavy and goes on for so long that Porsche checks his phone, thinking the the call has dropped. When Kinn finally speaks again, his voice sounds completely different, warm and soft, like usual. "I missed you. I have a break between meetings. Let me take you to lunch."

Lunch would be lovely, but... Porsche looks down at his t-shirt and shorts outfit. "Can we go somewhere not posh?"

Kinn chuckles. It sounds a bit strained, but that might just be the shitty connection. "Of course. I'll have Big find someone appropriately normal."

A few minutes later, he sends him the location of a little restaurant. It's just five minutes from where Porsche is right now. Lucky!

On the way over, he wonders if maybe there has been some sort of mix-up. Maybe they confused his debt for someone else's. In which case Porsche feels sorry for the poor sod who thought he'd paid it all off only to now find himself freshly saddled with Porsche's money troubles.

But he also cannot help the little glimmer of hope that sparks in his chest. Things would be so much easier if he didn't have to pay off his uncle's debt. Not great – beating people up and making drinks does not pay well enough for great – but a whole lot easier. He could get Chay a second set of school clothes, a new laptop; hell, he might even replace the ugly couch that stopped being comfortable fifteen years ago.

As he parks the bike and takes off his helmet, Porsche cautions himself not to trust this sudden, newfound freedom. As easy as it came, it could just as quickly be ripped away. Ohm could decide that Porsche does owe them after all and now he's late and Ohm hates people being late.

He's led to the back of the restaurant, into a room that is separated from the rest. Kinn's already there, looking expensive and out of place. He stands up when he sees Porsche, apprehension clear on his handsome face.

"Hey there, stranger", Porsche greets him with a smile as he comes closer for a hug and maybe a kiss. Kinn touches him carefully, like Porsche's a bomb and Kinn's just waiting for him to go off. "Rough day?" Porsche guesses and holds him tighter.

Finally, Kinn relaxes into his arms and even leans in to press a kiss against his cheek. "I guess so. How about you? How has you day been so far?"

Porsche thinks of his sudden good luck with the debt and the weird way the old woman treated him.

"Odd", he concludes. "But not necessarily bad."

"Anything you want to share?" There's a weird tension around Kinn's lovely mouth. 

Porsche thinks about the indignity of sharing yet another one of his messes and decides against that. The things that Kinn knows are bad enough, he does not need to add to the pile. Surely, even someone with the tolerance of a saint will eventually come to the conclusion that Porsche is more trouble than he's worth. Porsche would like to delay that moment for as long as possible.

"You can tell me when something's bothering you, you know?" Kinn tries once more.

Porsche firmly shakes his head and then urges the other man to sit down. 

"Let's eat, you promised me food."

Kinn gives him one final, long look, as if beseeching Porsche to change his mind, then he nods. 

"That I did." He proceeds to order seemingly every item on the menu. Porsche has to pace himself so he does not run out of stomach before he's had a chance to try it all. 

With the food comes Ya Dong, and lots of it. 

"To health", Kinn says and clinks his glass against Porsche's. It's a little early for alcohol, but Porsche does not want to be rude. He can't let Kinn be the only one drinking. So he downs his glass and then another when Kinn immediately refills it. 

"It's good, right?" he says, a warm smile on his lips. "It's from the north."

Porsche nods, already feeling the effect in the warmth of his cheeks. He's not drunk yet, just a little buzzed. It's nice. Being here, with Kinn, it's so nice. So he does not protest when Kinn tops him up again and again. Around the fifth glass, things become a little fuzzy.

At some point, Porsche ends up in Kinn's arm, a glass of orange juice pressed into his hand. The glass is ice cold and pleasant against his overheated skin. Porsche puts it against his forehead.

"What did they say?" Kinn wants to know.

Porsche blearily blinks up at him. "Huh? Who?"

"The people at the debt collector's office."

"How do you...", Porsche bites his lips. Damnit, he didn't want to tell Kinn about this. This is why he should not have drank so much. Curse him and his loose tongue.

"You can tell me, you know?" Kinn says, so, so gently as he runs his fingers through Porsche's hair and oh, that feels nice. That feels really nice. Porsche sighs and gives up. 

"Not much", he mumbles. "They were kind of weird. Yelling at me about not coming back." He rolls his eyes and grins up at Kinn, seeing if he will share in the hilarity of it all. But Kinn is not laughing. Instead, he's looking down at Porsche with deep concentration. 

"Did they tell you why? Did they mention anyone?" 

Porsche frowns. "Who should they have mentioned?"

"I don't know. You said they were odd people. Maybe they said a name." 

Porsche shakes his head, which inadvertently means that he's rubbing his cheek against Kinn's nice suit jacket. He buries deeper into the other man's shoulder and stays there. Porsche is drunk. And full. And happy. But also tired. 

"No name", he grunts. "But I can ask them when I go back."

Underneath his cheek, he feels Kinn go ramrod straight. "Why would you do that?" the other man asks, his tone absolutely neutral. 

"I still have to pay them back, I don't want to get on their bad side." He contemplates that for a second. "Well, worse side."

Kinn's arm comes around his shoulders, then pulls him more firmly against his body. "I don't think you should go back. They said they were done, no? No need to wake sleeping dogs."

Kinn might be right. Maybe Porsche should just let this rest and thank his lucky stars for the mix-up. He's sorry for whoever not how to deal with his mess, but not sorry enough to come forward and point out the mistake. 

Then again, if Ohm finds it himself and Porsche didn't say anything, he's going to be doubly pissed. 

So the right thing to do... the right thing to do is... Porsche's head is swimming. He can't think properly. 

"Ugh", he complains, "you got me so drunk. Shame on you."

"I know", Kinn says softly. "I'm a bad person." There's a smile in his voice though and his fingers against Porsche's face are soft and careful. So naturally, Porsche immediately forgives him.

"No", he says and kisses the little bit of skin on Kinn's neck he can reach, "you are the best person. My best person." His insides feel all warm and fuzzy.

At that, Kinn finally laughs. "Okay, you've had enough. Let's get you home." He pulls him up and even though Porsche is barely helpful at all, Kinn is strong enough to hold him. He brushes some hair out of Porsche's face and looks at him so fondly, Porsche's heart squeezes. 

"Sorry I got you drunk", Kinn says, though he does not sound all that sorry.

" 's fine", Porsche slurs. "It was good Ya Dong. Though you're probably used to fancier shit. Champagne. And the little bits and...", Porsche tries to remember what he knows about fancy people. It's woefully little. The top shelf bottles at Hum Bar are probably not up to Kinn's high standards.

Kinn just shrugs. "It's okay." He kisses Porsche, light and quick. "This is better."

"Spoiled", Porsche accuses him, though it holds not heat. "Must be nice." 

“You should join”, Kinn says, like that is something that’s in Porsche’s stars. Being part of those glitzy high society events. Only that it is definitely in Kinn’s stars. And now Porsche is somewhat part of those too and… and maybe the thought is not quite as ridiculous any more?

Porsche squints at him. He has to because Kinn is sort of double. 

"You want to bring me along to one of your rich people things?"

"It's just a minor car manufacturer. Nothing too outrageous. But the location is nice. You might enjoy it." 

Kinn has never wanted him in any part of his life. So this feels huge. Porsche feels giddy inside.

"I might not know... stuff", Porsche still warns. "I might embarrass you."

"Nonsense", Kinn shuts that down before the last syllable has left Porsche's mouth. "Besides, any evening would be greatly improved by having you there.”

Porsche ducks his head and blushes. No matter how often or how blatantly Kinn flirts with him, it gets to him every time. There is something heady about being wanted so much. Also, reassuring. Whatever life throws at him, Porsche can count on Kinn to want him around. It’s nice and stable in a way few things have been over the last, well, fifteen years.

“Then yeah, I think I would like to go.”

Kinn seems happy too. At least he smiles when he bundles Porsche into the car. "Don't get your hopes up though", he warns as he slides onto the leather next to him. "Chances are, you'll be bored out of your mind."

Porsche thinks that's unlikely, there'll be champagne and food and Kinn. 

When he stumbles into the house, heavily leaning on Kinn, Chay startles on the sofa. In contrast, Kim seems to have heard them the moment the car rolled to a stop and is just watching them with this eerily blank expression he sometimes gets.

"Hia!" his little brother calls, worried. "Are you okay."

"Fiiine", Porsche says and waves him to stay seated. "I just... Imma sleep this off."

"What did you do to him?" Kim asks and for a moment, Porsche is confused. Then he checks that the question was not aimed at him. Kinn has a slightly pinched expression. He tugs at Porsche's arm to get him moving across the room and towards the stairs. 

"Mind you own business, Kim", he says surprisingly cold, Porsche thinks, but then they are moving again and he does not think of anything except putting one foot in front of the other without falling off the stairs. 

When he's finally horizontal in his bed, Porsche lets out a bone deep sigh. Kinn gets busy taking off his shoes while Porsche wiggles himself out of his shirt and jeans.

Someone – Kinn, it's Kinn, Kinn's here – pulls the blanket over him and presses a kiss to his left shoulder. The mattress dips under the weight of the other man sitting down. 

"You know you can tell me when things gets rough, right?" he says quietly. His fingers are on Porsche's face again, stroking, tracing the line of his cheekbone down to his jaw.

Porsche shakes his head; not too much though so he does not disturb Kinn's gentle touches.

"Why would I do that", he mumbles. Terrible idea, terrible. "I don't want you involved in", he makes a gesture that is supposed to mean all that. Porsche's not sure if Kinn gets it, but he does catch Porsche's hand and presses a kiss to his knuckles. It's a little old-fashioned, Porsche feels, at least none of his past lover have done that, ever, but it's also very sweet. 

"I wish you'd let me help", Kinn says. He's letting go of Porsche's hand, which flops back onto the mattress.

"You're helping", he slurs back, sleep and alcohol making it hard to follow the conversation. Porsche doesn't want to talk, he wants to sleep. And also be touched by Kinn like this forever.

"I could help more", Kinn insists, whatever that is supposed to mean, "I could-" Porsche never learns what all Kinn could do because that's when Kinn's phone goes off. For a second, Kinn expression becomes uncharacteristically dark and annoyed, but by the time he answers the call, his voice is nothing but professionalism.

"I understand. I'll be right there." He hangs up and stands. "I have to go. Unfortunately."

Porsche tracks him with one barely opened eye. "Not allowed", he mumbles. 

That makes Kinn smile, wide and fond. He leans down to press a lingering kiss against Porsche's temple and if Porsche was not so drunk and tired, he would have wrapped his arms around his neck and pulled him down. Damn him for drinking so much.

"But I'll see you tomorrow at the gala. Can't wait to see you in a suit. And peel you out of it."

Porsche nods. That does sound nice. Being peeled out of a suit by Kinn. He gives him a happy little smile before his eyes finally do fall shut. He thinks he hears the door click, but that might have already been a sleep hallucination.

*~*~*

Porsche is an idiot.

A stupid, hungover idiot who does not know when to keep his big, stupid mouth shut.

There is no other explanation for why he agreed to be part of some high end event that he has absolutely no business being at.

Kinn cannot wait to peel him out of a suit, he said. Well, Kinn will have to wait a little longer since Porsche, shamefully, does not own a suit. He thought he did, but he either pawned it or is grew too small or was otherwise damaged, in any case, it’s not here.

Porsche has pulled every single piece of clothing he owns out of his wardrobe. Even his nicest shirts look like ratty in the harsh light of midday and without Kinn’s eyes on him.

Porsche is decently sure that Kinn does not care about his attire. As sure as he is that everybody else one hundred per cent will.

They will judge him.

And then judge Kinn and Porsche cannot bear the thought of anyone pointing out the glaringly obvious: That someone like Kinn has no business being with someone like Porsche.

Porsche does not want to hear it. He might know it in the farthest corner of his mind. Know that eventually, he will have his heart broken. Because Kinn comes from another world, one with reputation and class and Porsche has neither and this is not a fairytale. Eventually, Kinn will need someone respectable to accompany him to this and more important events and that person cannot and will not be Porsche.

Porsche is very happy not confronting these realities right now. Right now, he wants to live in the the fantasy and enjoy flirting with a hot guy who has the smile of a dork and the body of a god. Porsche is happy for the first time in what feels like a long time. He does not want the bubble to burst.

He’s got to tell Kinn he can’t come.

Porsche takes takes a deep breath and his phone.

Kinn answers after the first ring. “Hey”, he says and even though his voice is smaller and a little tinny over the phone, it still fills Porsche with warmth. And dread. Because how can he explain this to Kinn without hurting him? The last think Porsche wants him to think is that he doesn’t want to spend time with him.

Porsche looks at all the clothes strewn across his bed and dread settles in his stomach.

“Porsche?” Kinn asks. “Everything okay?”

“I’m sick”, Porsche lies and then fake-coughs into the mic. “I’m so sorry, but I don’t think I can go tonight. You have fun though. And if the are handing out free iPhones, bring me one. Or two. For Chay.”

“If you want an iPhone, I’ll buy you one. Or ten.”

“I don’t want you to waste your money. But I am very fine with you wasting other rich assholes’ money.”

“Hey”, Kinn objects but his tone is light. “We’re not all assholes.”

Porsche smiles into his phone. “Current talking buddies excluded.”

“Good then. Do you need anything? Should I send someone over? Should I call P’Mai?”

“No!” Porsche says too quickly. “No, no absolutely not, no. I’m fine.” Then he remembers that he is supposed to be sick. “I mean, I am feeling terrible but it’s probably just a little fever. See you soon!”

He hangs up before Kinn can ask any more questions or call him out on his atrocious lying. Porsche has never been very good at that and Kinn strikes him as the kind of person who sees through lies quite well.

Porsche is bustling around his kitchen, getting some cleaning-up done while listening to the radio, when he gets the uncanny feeling of being watched. It prickles down his neck and settles like a dead weight in his spine.

He turns towards the entrance and almost jumps out of his skin at spotting the dark silhouette out there. It takes half a second for his scrambled brain to notice that it’s a familiar shape and another to realise that the broad shoulders and slicked back hair belong to Kinn.

Porsche sags against the kitchen counter, clutching at his chest for emphasis before going to the entrance.

Kinn stands outside, looking… well, he looks mad, honestly. And like a million bucks in a dark red suit that Porsche doesn’t think he’s seen before.

Cautiously, Porsche pushes the sliding door to the side.

“Hey stranger”, he greets him with forced levity. “You look good.”

“As do you”, Kinn says, it sounds like an accusation. Porsche’s eyes flit to his face. Kinn looks pissed. His fingers are curling into fists before slowly opening again like it takes Kinn great effort to make them do so. There’s a white plastic bag dangling from them.

Porsche swallows, then he plasters a light-hearted smile on his mouth, the one he uses to deal with difficult customers. Porsche has smiled his way through and out of several storms.

He pretends not to know what Kinn is alluding to. “Well, thank you kindl-“

“You’re not sick”, Kinn accuses, his tone flat. Porsche kind of wishes he’d yell. That’s be easier to deal with. More familiar. “You lied to me.”

"Well", Porsche stalls for time to come up with another, a better lie, but nothing comes to mind. Nothing but the ugly, embarrassing truth and he's not read to be that vulnerable. Not when he's hung over. Not when Kinn looks so mad. Not when Porsche cares so much about him that he's terrified Kinn will wake up any second and realise exactly how little they have in common.

Since he does not have a good defence, Porsche opts for attack. "Why are you even here? I told you I was sick. Did you come to check for yourself?"

"Of course I did." Porsche is a little stunned to hear him admit it so freely.

"You're a control freak."

Kinn does not seem very phased by that accusation. Porsche's probably not the first person to tell him that. "Someone had to look after you, since we both know how horrible you are at looking after yourself."

That's... low. It's not like Porsche wants to not go to the doctor when he needs medical attention. Before he can come up with something scathing and clever, Kinn barrels on: "Why don't you want to come all of a sudden? You were all giddy at the idea last night. What happened?"

Last night, Porsche was drunk. And stupid. And clearly not considering all the consequences that came with accompanying Kinn to one of his rich boy events when not being a rich boy himself. But of course, he can't damit any of that. It's weak. 

He goes for a shrug. "Dunno, didn't feel like it."
"Nonsense", Kinn shuts that down. "Tell me!"

"Tell you, tell you", Porsche snaps. "Tell you what? That I don't have anything to wear? That none of my clothes are up to your fancy gala standards?" Porsche cuts himself off before he can reveal even more. This was plenty and mortifying at that.

Kinn's face does something complicated, then he takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly. "Why would you lie about something this insignificant?"

Insignificant. Porsche scowls at him and tries to remember that Kinn, in his silver-spoon life, probably has no idea what it feels like not to fit in.

"Worrying about your business partners looking at me and wondering why the hell you'd bring something like that is not insignificant to me", Porsche says defiantly. It feels way too vulnerable, but he's already lied once and doing it more probably won't help them. 

Kinn looks stricken for a moment, as if of all the things he expected Porsche to say, this was not it. Then he pushes past Porsche into the living room. He sets the white bag down on the table. Porsche spots some cough syrup, some pills against fever. Kinn brought him medicine. Because he thought Porsche was sick. Porsche's heart squeezes in his chest. Nobody has ever cared for Porsche when he's sick since his parents died. He's just lucky to basically never catch anything. 

"Look", Kinn says as he reaches for Porsche, now that he has both hands free. He takes his face between them. "I meant it when I said every function would be lucky to have you. In jeans and a t-shirt."

"I cannot rock up to your fancy thing in jeans and a t-shirt", Porsche protests. Especially not with Kinn looking like he stepped off the front cover of Vogue. 

"You could", he other man says. "You really could, nobody would dare to say a word." 

Porsche highly doubts that.

"But you don't have to, if you don't want to, of course. I just wish you'd told me sooner. There's not enough time now."

"Time for what?" Porsche wants to know.

"To get you something you feel more comfortable in, of course." Porsche is not entirely sure what he means. Will he lend Porsche one of his suits? They are almost of a height, so that might work, even is Kinn's a little broader.

"I can't stay much longer, unfortunately. I promised my father I'd handle this launch."

There he is, the ominous father that Kinn definitely does not want to introduce Porsche to. Porsche ignores the knot in the pit of his stomach and instead concentrates on Kinn and the warmth of his hands.

"Have fun at your event. Dinner tomorrow?" he asks hopefully. Kinn leans in to press a short but passionate kiss into his lips.

"Dinner sounds lovely. And Porsche", he tilts Porsche's face up, his thumbs lightly resting against his cheeks, warm and gentle.

"Hm?" Porsche hums, a little lost in Kinn's eyes, his touch, his scent.

"Don't lie to me. I promise I won't be mad at you for telling me an uncomfortable truth, but don't lie to me. I cannot abide liars."