Work Text:
“What do you think…? Can you work with these lyrics?”
Gotoh ‘Bocchi’ Hitori asked as she nervously tapped her feet on the wooden cafe floor. Her hands grasped tighter on the cup of cola she had ordered, the drink barely consumed as the girl holding it eagerly awaited a response.
Yamada Ryo silently read through the notebook Bocchi had written the lyrics to their new song. The two members of Kessoku Band had agreed to meet up at a nearby trendy cafe after their usual practice session to discuss the progress of the new song. Bocchi had been left in charge of writing the lyrics, a task initially met with hesitation by the guitarist but ultimately proved to be the right decision as all their songs have been met with positive reception from the few fans they have amassed so far.
Ryo, on the other hand, was in charge of composing the music, a task she was more than willing to take. Confident in her musical prowess, Ryo always enjoyed the challenge of composing. Creating something out of nothing with only several lines of words gave the bassist a sense of pride when it finally clicked. As she carefully read through the lyrics Bocchi had written, Ryo’s mind raced with countless possibilities of beats and notes, all ready to be composed like an artist with a blank canvas.
This bright morning, bright morning
Is too dazzling, too dazzling
Somehow, it feels
Like my heart is floating
The words you told me
I never want to let go, never want to let go
“I think I can work with this.” She eventually answered, putting the notebook down.
“Ah, that’s good then!” Bocchi said as she breathed a sigh of relief. “I really struggled coming up with the lyrics, it kept me up for the past few nights…”
“Tis the hard life of a rocker.” Ryo remarked, putting the notebook down for a moment to eat her curry rice. While she wasn’t one to openly express herself, the curry was some of the best she had ever eaten. The sweet yet spicy flavouring of the gravy melted in her mouth, leaving a longing sense of home-cooked bliss. Perhaps it was because Ryo had eaten nothing but cheap convenience store food and weed for the past month. Or perhaps she just had simple tastes, but she was savouring every moment of it like she had discovered psychedelic rock for the first time.
This is some damn good curry.
“Um, Ryo-san? You’ve been staring at your plate for a while now.” Bocchi said.
“Just enjoying the taste of this curry.” Ryo answered as she savoured her last spoonful of curry. Wiping her mouth and thanking for the meal, Ryo promptly picked back up the notebook. A general framework of the composition was beginning to take shape but as she was reading through the lyrics once more. However, her thought process was interrupted when she started thoroughly reading the words written on the page, particularly one verse she had skimmed through.
One day I will disappear
I wonder if I'll remain in someone's memory
Just this snippet of a moment
Ryo had never paid much attention to the deeper meaning behind the lyrics Bocchi wrote. She had written her fair share of downer lyrics, some downright concerning if someone found her notebook and read it without context. However, this particular verse created an uneasy vibe in her. Something that she could only best describe as ‘a bad feeling’.
“Bocchi,” Ryo called out, “are you alright?”
The sudden break of silence caught Bocchi off guard, nearly losing her grip on the cup of cola she had been holding, just barely managing to prevent a catastrophic fizzy mess. “Ah, yes?? I-I’m completely fine here!” Bocchi fumbled her words as she sipped on her drink, acting like nothing had happened.
“You sure?”
“Y-yep! Completely normal and okay!” Bocchi replied, cracking a wide grin. Anyone with half a brain cell could tell Bocchi was faking said smile. Even Ryo, airheaded as she was at times, quickly deduced the issue.
Bocchi was feeling down.
In any cliche slice-of-life manga, this would usually be the part where Ryo would try and get Bocchi to open up about her feelings through some soft and considerate talking. Unfortunately for her, she was the worst choice for that. Her way with words is as subtle as a punk rock band performing at a funeral. If Nijika or Ikuyo were here, they would easily get Bocchi to open up. Even if the task of cheering Bocchi up seemed daunting, Ryo was gonna try anyway, as any good friend would.
“Bocchi, do you want to hear a story?”
“U-um… sure?” Bocchi replied with a look of slight confusion.
“When I was in my previous band, I doubled as both composer and lyricist.”
Bocchi's eyes perked up. “I-I never thought Ryo-san would be good at writing lyrics.”
Ryo shrugged, “I didn’t get much choice in the matter. My previous bandmates saw me get good grades one time and immediately considered me a wordsmith.” She said as she rubbed her temples as if cringing at the memory of a different time. “I told you before how I liked their lyrics for how awkward but honest they were right?”
Bocchi nodded. “Because you were the one who wrote it…?”
“Yup.”
“Can I read them one day?”
“No.”
A brief silence followed between the two loners as Ryo took a sip of her glass of water while Bocchi stared off into her own space. The awkwardness of the situation is barely masked by the sounds of other patrons and staff who occupied the cafe.
“...anyway, as I told you before, the band wanted to become more ‘mainstream’ with their songs. So they asked me to write more cheerful and happy-go-lucky lyrics.”
“And… you had issues with it?” Bocchi asked.
Ryo curled her lips, tightly clenching the glass in her hand as the water inside was disturbed by the sheer force coming from Ryo's somewhat slender arm.
“I hated it.” She answered. The flat tone of her voice couldn’t mask her disgust. “I tried writing them for a while, but the more I wrote, the deeper I went into downer lyrics. Those lyrics soon turned into thoughts….”
Ryo stared straight into Bocchi’s sapphire-blue eyes. Bocchi was unnerved at the sudden intense eye contact, unprepared for what the bassist said next.
“....Very, very bad thoughts.”
The mood of the conversation suddenly turned heavy as the two sat in silence once more. As the words continued to linger in her head, Bocchi realized she and Ryo weren’t so different after all. She feels a strange sense of comfort, finding mutual understanding with another loner.
“Do you….still have those bad thoughts?” Bocchi eventually mustered the courage to ask.
“For a time.” Ryo answered. “But, it changed after something happened.”
“What was it?”
“Nijika.”
“Eh?” Bocchi tilted her head, confused with the answer.
“Don’t ever tell her this, but Nijika was the only reason I still bothered playing in a band. If it weren’t for her….” Ryo’s voice trailed off as she briefly averted Bocchi’s gaze, scratching her nose. Bocchi didn’t expect to see Ryo, always with a stern expression on her face, look so nervous and… vulnerable.
I think it’s kinda cute….
“...what I’m trying to say is that having friends you can depend on is important in a band. Whether it’s Nijika, Ikuyo… or even me, don’t be afraid to come to us alright?
Bocchi stared blankly as her mind processed Ryo’s words. Friends. Even though Bocchi had known the others for some time now, it still felt surreal knowing all of them considered her a friend. A concept so alien to her in her 15 years on this planet. She had grown accustomed to the loneliness in her life, sometimes thinking she could just vanish one day and the rest of the world wouldn’t even notice. But now, hearing Ryo of all people, telling her that people cared and her existence was valued.
Bocchi felt happy.
“T-thank you, Ryo-san.” Bocchi softly answered, a genuine smile forming on her face. “I’m so glad you see me as a friend..!”
“We’re a band, and sometimes bands can be closer than family.” Ryo said, finishing her water before getting out of her seat. “Come on, time for us to leave.”
“Ah, alright…. I guess I’ll go ahead and pay for the-”
Ryo raised her hand, “I’ll pay.”
Bocchi blinked several times as she comprehended the words that just came out of Ryo’s mouth. She soon reacted in shock and was taken aback. “A-are you okay Ryo?! A–a-are you going to die?? Should I inform Nijika-chan?!”
Ryo scoffed but wasn’t surprised at the reaction. Even she couldn’t remember the last time she paid first, always relying on others (mostly Nijika) and paying back later (usually). Having just got her part-time pay, Ryo wasn’t strapped for cash, unlike previous occasions. Normally, the money earned would leave her possession after the third day, mostly through impulsive purchases of random junk. However, as she stared once more into the soft eyes of the pink-haired girl standing in front of her, she figured she could make an exception for once.
After paying, Bocchi and Ryo exited the cafe into the cool autumn evening of Shimokitazawa’s streets, a gentle breeze blowing away leaves as it signified another year would soon come to a close.
“T-thank you for the meal….” Bocchi said, slightly bowing in appreciation.
“Think nothing of it.” Ryo answered as she gently nudged Bocchi’s arm with her fist. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Alright, see you…”
The two waved before turning and going their separate ways. As Ryo slowly made her way back home, many thoughts continued to flood her mind: The song she had to compose, the lyrics, Bocchi’s feelings and whether her pay would last her for the week. However, there was only one thing on her mind right now, an essential task she must complete before she could focus on anything else.
Time to get some ice cream.