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Miguel O'Hara hates his heats.
And the most he hates about it is the nest part. and that’s never a good thing to anyone with a second gender, it is as instinctual as breathing. especially to omegas. but not to Miguel, not anymore anyway. He doesn't go on heat breaks. constantly on heat suppressant, injecting into his systems, never giving into that side of him, demolishing it the moment it tries to crawl up.
He doesn't allow it, not when all it does is bring heartaches and pain to every little hope of a life of his own the second it comes to an end. Never living that lie again.
but these past two years have been spinning him around like an electromagnetic hover. it left him a lot to unpack, and he didn't know where to start with any of it.
one of them being that Lyla, along with other spiders, mainly Jess and Peter B, had forced him to get an entire health check, with a spider-doctor of course, -he can never trust anyone from his own world to do that mostly for identity sack but also with the paranoia of never knowing if they won’t just do something to him on top of what he’s already suffering from-, and the result coming in that he has…..A LOT of issues that made the doctor's scent become so sour that he could smell it all the way from medbay as it rapidly got closer to his office, -he learned that an angry doctor with spider powers is a force to reckon with-, and the medic herself dragging him back to a particular room to run more ‘urgent’ tests and personally tell him of the results.
then she laid it all out for him while firmly going into details about all his poor behavior and lack of care for his second gender and all that he needs for it to be at a healthy level.
He had a locked scent gland condition, meaning the constant production of one type of pheromones had caused his glands to semi-lock on that set of pheromones which is a not good thing when it hinders the body’s way of distributing the right scents, speaking of scent, he also had a nearly gloged scent poars due to his overuse of scent blockers. The required treatment for it was a bunch of medications and pills along with a routine to ease his glands into a more open pheromone casting and clearing the scent pores for better release of scents.
He wishes that it was the only problem there was because the moment the medic professional mentioned ‘heat’ he wanted to run out of the room and lock his office to avoid this. But he knew better that it was a losing battle as he saw how the doctor effortlessly caught him the first time and dragged him here.
Miguel O’Hara fully downplayed the severity of his self-denied heat cycle. And the spider doctor was good at conveying how terrible it had gotten. Heats and Ruts aren’t just a period to spend with mates and packs, but a very valuable part in body growth, strengthening the second gender and all their unique traits, scents, and what comes with it, but It also works as a self-filtering system for any needed waste discharge in the body while also resting it.
Due to him overdosing on heat suppressants caused his whole filtering system to go haywire leading him to all the unbearable headaches, hostility, and short temper along with loss of Appetite, chronic pains, and phantom inflation that drives his nerves to feel irritatingly icky.
The solution? The very same thing he was poisoning his with chemicals to dodge. He doesn't want to spend his heat. It’s pointless, hollowed out of all it ever was to him. Anguishedly letting die silently. Losing another part to his self-inflicted cures.
Deplorably it wasn't an option. he desperately thought to himself that he could just act like he’d do it and disappear for a few days to avoid actually spending his heat.
but he once again underestimated the Doctor’s seventh sense, which came with years of dealing with stubborn patients who’ll go far and beyond than do as the doctor says, almost like she read his mind and blatantly told him that she had already informed others spider-folks about his ‘next few days off’.
In other words, he won’t get away easily, and blocking them from his earth is futile because they have their own watches that are not connected to the HQ system, LYLA is onto this as well being his assistant his health is her top priority now per doctor orders.
He wanted to argue. Wanting any other way to spare him all these undesired forlorn feelings. But the look she sends him along with the bitter scent was enough for him to drop it.
sighing exhaustingly and rubbing his face down he gave his word to the concerned doctor and got up, promising the medic he would go and grab all she had prescribed him and set a schedule to remind him of it. A scent that spoke of satisfaction, the medic nodded and discharged him.
Walking down the hallway connecting the medbay and lobby. Miguel was in his mind space, body automatically steering him to his office after handing LYLA the prescription list to inform the pharmacy section of him coming later to collect it later, he knows all too well he was destroying himself in every aspect with his never-ending grief, he’s mind is plagued with only the bad things in his life.
He got close to the cafeteria and stood there looking around and noting how there were very few spider folks that he could count on his hand, he contemplated whether to grab some food now or later along with his prescription meds. in the end, he remembered he hadn’t had dinner yesterday nor breakfast this morning and after his check-in with the doctor, he felt he could use some freshly cooked meal to take his mind off of things.
Striding his way to the lunch counter, bypassing unoccupied stools and spider people nearing his destination, he hears laughter, he stops in his tracks and follows the direction of the sound, and he finally registers the familiar scent, but it’s not muffled but prominent and full of youthful joy along with a somewhat warm calming feeling to it that feels like a sun ray after a cold night.
A blooming sunflower scent that only one person, one kid, has and he caught the familiar form of the boy that is rarely seen around here, -because of him- in one of the tables on the further side of the cafeteria’s entrance.
It was Miles. and he of course wasn’t by himself since there were three more sitting with him, Gwen, Hobie, and Pavtir. it’s no surprise as these four are a pack, and so inseparable, and after the whole ordeal three months ago those three might as well be his bodyguards. Margo is also part of their pack but she’s mostly busy along with her preferring not to dimension-hop too much, but she is as protective as the rest of them.
The four of them seem to be looking while chuckling and pointing at something Miles is showing them. Enhancing his vision he saw a bunch of sketchbooks scattered on the table, flipping through them and chatting away.
It has never occurred to him how he never saw the kid so freely expressive. His heart squeezes in shame at almost stripping that away from him. Of dimming another pup because of his selfishness. But the omega part in him whined brokenly for some reason. but why does it care? is it because it still wishes to nurture and care for a pup? The last time he did the pup disappeared in his arm.
Lost in his mind, and not noticing that Miles had got up and was making his way here as well, not until the scent got strong enough that it snapped through his anarchic thoughts.
But as he looked up -was he standing there looking at his feet in the middle of the cafeteria?? he’s glad no one is actually around- the footsteps stopped a little further than him. Miles stood there staring at him, and Miguel was more than ready to turn around and walk -run- out of here because there’s a reason why the kid only comes around when there’s barely anyone around, he doesn't want to interact with any other spiders, but he also comes when Miguel is not around, but lately he started coming when there’s little crowd, but Miguel is there.
Even when he does he’s always wearing scent blockers, Miguel does catch a bit of his scent -thanks to his enhanced sense of smell- but never fully unless he gets closer. which he can never do.
Just as he was about to turn around. Miles smiled at him. *smile at him*. Miguel froze in his place not sure how he should react to that, especially as the kid turned and walked up to him. but deep down a part of him crooned at the fact the pup came to him. but he won’t let it show.
Miles stood in front of him “Good morning Miguel!” he greeted. Miles never really initiated a conversation with him first and the few times they did talk it was mostly to ask for permission to go on a mission with the others. and there’s always someone with him. Miles never accepted a watch of his own choosing to stay in his world and only using a day pass bracelet when he’s not.
It’s awkward but he answered “Good morning to you too, Miles” he greeted back with a little nod. Miles cast him a look like Miguel was missing something did he? Then he took notice of the kid’s scent, it felt like it was reaching for something. then he realized it his own lack of scent. he didn't grasp how bad it really was.
but before he could dwell on it, Miles spoke “Are you doing okay? You seem…tired” he softly asked. that caught him off guard. but the kid always let his concerns for others be known. and that part of him was moved by the pup's worry but it also persisted him to soothe the pup. he pushed it back.
“it’s okay you don’t have to worry ” he says, but Miles doesn’t buy it and says “ Are you sure? You look like someone who has coffee running through their body instead of blood” he lightly jokes, Miguel chuckles bit and figured the kid won’t leave till he spells the problem. He gives in.
“I was at a check-in with the doctor a while ago,” he says and sees the worry return to Miles, and his instinct kicks again but he suppresses it. “did you get hurt?” Miles inquired, Miguel shook his head “Not it’s just…that time again for me. I was instructed to take a little time off” he answered.
Miles is still concerned but not as much, just relieved either way “But why have a Check-in? Is there something wrong? Is that why your scent is a little off?” Miles questioned, and he has the right to feel weirded out that someone’s scent is not there anymore. Miguel sighed “ Yes it’s just I had a rough few months and need propel rest and I'll be fine” he simply explained, Miles honey brown eyes gazed at him, it felt like it found something in about him, “Do you want me to help? I know how heats feels. Maybe help with nest building? LYLA once said your nest is not built right” he suggests, looking at him expectantly. it let loose his other side, cooing at the idea of the pup in their nest where he should be, suppressing it became harder but remained in check.
Miguel shook his head again “No need to I can manage it myself but thanks for your consideration” he declined, Miles wanted to say more but he was called, eyes going wide at his forgotten task. looking disappointed, he drops the subject and turns around but not before saying “Don't ask for Peter’s help for the nest you’ll end up with a blanket fort” he advised taking his order from the worker.
Miguel snorts “Would never dare to” he replies waving his hand at the retreating kid, “ Good! Bye tio!” he sends him one last smile and leaves.
he stares for a moment and walks to the counter and makes his order. after getting it he starts making his way out and to his office. but not with one last look at the young pack with all the happy pheromones merging together and creating a nice atmosphere around.
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Miguel O’Hara, in moments like these, really and truly hates his mother.
Now putting this dust collecting room in the back of his office to use. Since he already lives in HQ and rarely use his apartment. And also staying close in case of anything.
Sorting through all the nest materials and shuffling they were all ordered by LYLA. They all reeks of machin and factory so unfamiliar. Not his.
The spider in him also peferd a different way to make the nest. So now after using his organic webs and weaving it the nest look like some sort of a hammock with all the blankets and pillows over flowing it.
He fears he might have forgotten how to make a nest. He doesn't want to let that thought fester.
His heat has long since started and he's already dreading it, not holding back his instincts anymore but it's just for nothing. There's just the sorrowful memories to keep him company.
The meds help a lot with his scent he almost forgot what his own scent was like. At least having something to just make it bearable for the next few days.
But it's bitter. That's all it can make in oppression to what he feels. All it does is reminding him if all he never had. All he'll never. All he lost when wanting what's he couldn't have.
It hurts and sink in so deep like a bullet that can never be remove so the skin just grow around it leaving to rust in him.
He hears quiet, careful steps nearing his room. Not having time to get out he wears the door slowly open pause and then closes.
Shouldn't it be locked?! Didn't he tell LYLA to lock it?? Just great after years of avoiding his heat and just wanting to spend it any way peacefully just to be over with it, is too much to ask.
As Miguel was becoming very irritated and letting show through his scent he let out a warning growl not in the mood to deal with who ever is trace passing his territory.
He heard the feet batter stop near a good distance from his nest. But there was shuffling. It's starting to get on his nerves and pulled himself from under the covers to tear through who thought it's a good idea to disturb him in the worst time possible.
He freezes the moment he caught the scent. In all his heat daze he had not caught it.
This warm welcome scent, and so so young. A pup. Quickly reaching the ledge of his nest he sees him. Miles in civvy clothes and looking up at his nest with his bright coffee eyes.
Then in a low tone that he almost didn't hear it “Miguel?” He says. And all his restrictions over his instincts is thrown of the out the window.
Carefully he slips out his nest. And cautiously close the distance between him and the pup.
The pup seemed a little nervous, but why? He has to comfort him! He began to coo at the pup encouraging him to come closer. He want the pup to feel safe and come himself.
Miles does step close but not much “Miguel, are you…do you want me to leave?” He hesitantly ask. Miguel looks at him confusedly, then he remembers, his scent is not synchronizing with his emotions.
The pup properly thinks he's being rejected. No! He it's not what he he meant! He's starting to panic, he doesn't want the pup to go how is he supposed to protect him them.
In his turmoil two small hands gently hold his one of and face the tiny thing in front of him the pup has an apologetic expression on his young face. What for?
“Sorry I know about your condition don't worry I'm here” the pup reassures him and his scent invades the surroundings sweet and warm and comforting the omega in him might as well be singing with how ecstatic it is at the trust the pup has in him to come and seeks him out.
His scent waver a friction and turn into a request for permission to join in the nest. what a bizarre thing to ask, the pup should have been in the nest from the beginning! Is what he thinks.
Carefully and gently he picks up the pup and carries him to the nest to tuck him in, he start working on rearranging the nest to be more suitable for the pup trying to make the perfect spot to lay down with the pup.
Finally satisfied he returns to the waiting pup after covering the nest's entrance. He lays down next to the pup and pulls him closer while purring softly to him.
The pups also purrs but is muffled by Miguel's thunderous ones bringing closer the pup to his chest, snuggling deeper in the nest that now has thier scent. That now feels like a true nest.
The pup started to doze off, he was definitely tired after spending time to find the nest.
He lolled the pup to sleep hearing the soft snoring with the steady rise and fall of his form brought indescribable feeling to him! His pup is in his arms, in his nest safe and sound not gone right.
Miguel soon followed after the pup in a peaceful slumber. But not before curling his arm and whole body around the pup. Never once pausing his purrs.
His eyelids gradually started to close gladly giving in the pulls of a nice dream sleep.
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When Miguel next woke up he felt lighter and more at peace and regained so self awareness from his heat.
He felt something move besides him, sluggishly moving aside to see and he was met with bright honey brown big doe eyes staring at him.
He almost jumped out of his skin ut held himself instead trying to recall how Miles even ended up here, he hears him laugh and get up pushing layers of covers off him “I never took you for the broody type” he playfully jokes.
Miguel sputters not knowing how to assess this situation, in lieu he shacks his head and composes himself “um how did you get here?” He asks.
Miles only grins at him “wow so were reall out of it more than I thought” was the boy's repl, it was enough to cause Miguel to heat up from embarrassment.
Shock
That what he hate the most when going into heat he doesn't deny how broody he get ut the worst part is he can barely remember what he does complete disconnection the moment his hind brain takes over. It's very overbearing to him.
But that's leave his head when he ask the boy “ why did you stay?” it was more of a whisper, feeling the words heavy on his tongue.
Miles playful expression changed to a solemn one “ because I wanted to I know what's you're going through” he answers. But Miguel still what's to understand the real ***why*** “ but I hurt you” he says back.
His his looks more determined now “ no you did not and I understand your reasoning you…you were scared that you'll get hurt again and someone else might suffer it's just you…took a bad approach to it and I'll be honest I was also scard that I might be wrong that it's hopeless but I rather at least try than living with all the ‘what-ifs’ for the rest of my life” Miles said all out with a strong tone .
Miguel stared at the young boy, dropping his head he says “but that doesn't excuse me isolating you ” with shame that was still unforgivable, but Miles counter him with “ yeah it still hurt but i get you point that there was just to many possible risks with a simple action”.
Knowing Miles stubborn he accepts his answer thought there's still a lingering question “ then why did you come here?” He asks instead. Miles fidgets a bit ut replies “ I went and asked about all your diagnosis after our talk in the cafeteria because I knew exactly what you're going through and I….and I didn't want you to go through it Alone” he avoided looking into Miguel's eyes.
Sending his distress he maneuvers the pup closer to him and cradle him in his bulky arms “but how do you know that?”he carefully asked .
Miles has a fond yet mournful look in his youthful face and his eyes dulls a bit “uncle Arron was just like that he was mostly lonely and never forming bonds…after my parents had me he started stealing me from them and be all broody he moved to Brooklyn just to stay close to me….” He was on the verge of tears at the memory of his dead family member.
Miguel knows all too well he squeezes the kid in a grounding hug it helps as the kids trembling goes away leaving him exhausted but he runs his cheek with Miguel's, purring and giving off happy content pheromones.
Miguel runs soothing circles on the kids back “ thank you, Miles” he breathes out over the kid's head.
Miles hums “ no need to it was worth it I never knew you could smell like pumpkin latte heh” he tease lay down now.
Miguel's eyes widened. He can produce other scents again!. And that mean he could communicate with his pup! He was overjoyed but kept it down for the sake of the sleeping pup who was out like light.
Bring his small form close, covering him and curling protectively around his pup Miguel let himself live in this moment. Making all kinds of scent he could to help his pup relax.
Yeah, maybe he might actually look forward to his other heats and maybe bring the rest of the young pack in his nest.
But he's more than happy in this moment.