Chapter Text
Nijika: “Woahhhhh, look at that!”
Grounding herself in front of a store’s glass display, Nijika had a look of wonder in her eyes staring at a dress. I had never seen her so entranced by a piece of clothing like this before, I always figured Ikuyo was the most materialistic in our band. I guess it makes sense that Nijika has that side to her too. She probably just doesn’t want to compete with Ikuyo’s energy.
Ryo: “…Is it really that nice?”
Nijika: “Uh, yeah!! It’s soooooo pretty!”
I re-examined the dress, as I’d only given it a halfhearted look the first time. It definitely seemed to be made of high-quality material. Its design was sleek - a mostly black dress with select white in certain spots, just enough to make whoever wore it glow. It honestly didn’t strike me as Nijika’s taste, but maybe it was just that appealing to her.
Nijika: “So… what do you think?”
Ryo: “About the dress?”
Nijika: “N-No, dummy.”
Ryo: “…?”
Nijika began to fiddle with her hands behind her back, and was unable to keep eye contact. Her face was beginning to turn red as well. I was just confused, so I kept staring at her. Eventually, she looked up to me and spoke.
Nijika: “I’m asking… how you think I would look in it…”
Ryo: “Eh?”
That’s what this was about? That’s even more confusing to me. Every time I try… N-No, she’s giving me the opportunity, I should just roll with it.
Ryo: “…Well, you’re already pretty, so the dress would just amplify it.”
Nijika: “E-Eh???”
Ryo: “…?”
Instead of giving me a response, she just began to turn red again and shot her head down. Haah… this always happens. I always seem to make her upset when I’m honest… Why do I keep trying?
…
I need to erase this awkward air.
Ryo: “…I bet you’d have a ton of people crushing on you if you posted yourself wearing it. Maybe someone at school would give some passionate confession.”
I ignored the stinging of my own heart…
Nijika: “…Pffft, no way.”
I couldn’t see her expression while she was still looking down, but she brought her face up with a cheerful smile. That’s what I really wanted. If I have to push down my own feelings to see that, then it’s fine.
Ryo: “It’s true. You could be the Kita of our school.”
Nijika: “Yeah, yeah, butter me up some more.”
…I’m not lying.
As I let out a small sigh at my own inability to suppress my emotions, I took another look at the display glass in front of me. The dress did look nice, and imagining Nijika in it was an amusing thought, but… I had somehow failed to notice its companion piece. A suit… A similar design of black and white, yet it was designed in a way that complemented the dress perfectly. I hadn’t quite understood the beauty of the dress on its own, but in conjunction with the suit… I was starstruck.
I had never been one to have much interest in fancier clothing like this, but… a thought entered my mind. A painful thought. A fantasy that I knew would never become reality. But… that fantasy brought me so much happiness. Even if it isn’t real… maybe just imagining it is enough…
Nijika: “…You wanna buy it?”
Ryo: “E-Eh?”
I had gotten so entranced that I almost forgot I was here with Nijika. Even though she couldn’t have known what I was thinking about, I scrambled to act natural. Even the thought that she could see into my mind like she could Bocchi filled me with unease.
Nijika: “You looked so happy. I’ve honestly never seen you look at anything like that before.”
Ryo: “…It just spoke to me.”
Nijika: “Then you should definitely buy it!”
Egged on by her, I moved to examine the price tag. This store was by no means exemplary, so I figured its items would match its appearance. However…
Ryo: “Actually, a flock of birds attacked me and stole all of my money. I think it might be the oncoming of the birdemic.”
Nijika: “…You got attacked by birds?”
Ryo: “Yeah.”
Nijika: “When? You only go outside when I make you.”
Ryo: “I go to record shops sometimes…”
Nijika: “Yeah, yeah… You know, I’ve been around you long enough to know when you’re lying or telling the truth, so there’s really no point in lying to me.”
Ryo: “…I don’t have enough.”
Nijika: “How much do you have?”
I quickly pulled out my wallet and faced a horrifying realization.
Ryo: “…5 yen.”
Nijika: “WHA-“
I had spent all of my monthly allowance on a pedal I saw on Amazoon… I know Nijika told me to be smarter with my spending, but I only feel bad after the fact…
Nijika: “…Hnng, this is why I tell you to have more self control.”
Ryo: “I’m sorry.”
Nijika: “I’ve seriously never met anyone as bad with money as you.”
Ryo: “Then just let me leave it to you.”
Nijika: “E-Eh?”
As she began to turn red again, I cursed myself for letting my thoughts slip out again. I’m usually way better at hiding my feelings with sarcasm and bad jokes, but for some reason I’m speaking my mind around Nijika more than usual when we’re alone.
Once again desperate to take back our cheery air, I covered up my feelings with a quip.
Ryo: “It’s my birthday, so spot me?”
Strangely, I saw a flash of disappointment on her face, before a small breath brought an annoyed look.
Nijika: “It’s not your birthday for another hour, Ms. Yamada. You’re gonna have to wait until then to start mooching.”
Ryo: “Ehhhhhh?”
Nijika: “Don’t ‘ehhhhhhh?’ me!! Why’d you even bring me to a mall if you didn’t have any money!?”
Ryo: “You asked me out at the last minute… I just knew that this place was open all night. Why did you ask me out? We’re meeting up tomorrow.”
Nijika: “I-I know that! But…”
Seeing her start to get pouty as she couldn’t determine what words to say, I struggled to hold back my desire to tease her…
Ryo: “Are you jealous that Bocchi and Kita went on a little trip together?”
Nijika: “Eh!?”
Ryo: “To think… the band’s original problem children feel comfortable enough with each other to spend their nights alone together. I know you’re disappointed you don’t get to see their lovebirds act today, but they’ll be back tomorrow. I’m sure Ikuyo will spill allllll the details if you ask her.”
Nijika: “That’s not it at all.”
Ryo: “H-Huh?”
I had gotten so into my teasing that I hadn’t noticed, but she was looking into my eyes with a fierce determination. I had no idea what brought this on… Taking a little deep breath, she continued.
Nijika: “It’s exactly because they’re gone… that I wanted to spend the night with you.”
Ryo: “N-Nijika…”
I didn’t really know how to react to that. I couldn’t bring myself to make eye contact with her.
Ever since Bocchi and Kita started dating, things have gotten… awkward between me and Nijika. One of us will say something that could be taken in that context, but neither of us have the courage to continue it. I don’t really know how she feels about me… and I don’t want to risk losing my friendship with her because I couldn’t hold back my feelings…
…If those two hadn’t started dating, could I have kept the simple friendship I held with her before without any complaints?
Nijika: “…I-I mean, ever since we’ve been doing all the band stuff, we haven’t really gone out together.”
Ryo: “…As friends?”
Why the hell did I ask that??
Nijika: “…Yeah. Not bandmates. Friends.”
…She somehow took it the wrong way.
Nijika: “I just thought… it would be awful if no one was there to wish you happy birthday.”
Ryo: “…That’s why you invited me out?”
Nijika: “Mm-hm! You’re my best friend, you know!”
Even though I knew she was being endearing, those words only wounded my heart further. I simply looked away.
Ryo: “…And yet, you still won’t pay for me.”
Nijika: “Hnnnnnng, am I just a walking wallet to you!?”
Ryo: “Pu-hu~”
Nijika: “Don’t use a weird laugh to avoid the question!!”
The truth is I didn’t know how to answer anymore. Tonight was slowly unraveling feelings I wanted to keep buried, and unless I started to force my usual shenanigans, I feared that I would utter words I could never take back.
Nijika: “Haaaaaah… I swear, you drive me so crazy…”
She began to walk away from me, but I was unsure of where. When I moved to go with her, however-
Nijika: “I-I’m going to the bathroom. Don’t follow me!!”
Ryo: “Eh?”
Going to the bathroom wasn’t strange, nor was I going to follow her, but her absolute denial of it was a little odd to me. Maybe I actually put her in a bad mood, and now she needs to cool off for a few minutes…
Nijika: “J-Just stay here, and d-don’t follow!!”
Ryo: “Okay, okay.”
Her face was red as she left in the direction that we came from. I guess I made her that mad.
Ryo: “Haah…”
Why am I so bad at making her happy… I opened my phone and saw it was 11:00 PM. One hour before I turn 18. For some reason, that thought was also making me sad…
Trying to get my mind off of things, I decided to look around at the other stores, at least what I could see from where I was standing. It was a little early in my opinion, but some stores had already begun their Halloween promotions. I saw a few other clothing stores, a record store I wanted to check later, some fast food places, and what seemed like a generic toy store.
For some reason, the words on the display glass at that store stuck out to me… I couldn’t tell you why, they were completely ordinary words. You could probably see words like them at any Halloween themed store. Yet… I couldn’t rip my eyes away. It almost felt like I wasn’t in control of my body… No, that’s not quite right. It was like some invisible presence was forcing me to look at these words…
‘Halloween Set Available Now!’
Totally normal words… So why?
‘Halloween Set’
Is it about Halloween?
‘Set’
Huh… Set? That’s what’s sticking out to me? Why?
‘Set’
Set…
‘Set’
Set???
‘Set’
…God, the more I look at it, the less it looks like a real word.
‘Set’
…This is getting annoying.
‘Set’
…What are you trying to tell me???
‘Set’
Is something wrong with my brain!?
‘Set’
Arghhh, what do you want!?
‘Set’
Two can play at that game…
‘Set’
Set!!
‘Set’
Set set set set set set set set set set set set set set set set set set set set set set set set set set set set set set set set!
‘Set’
Ryo: “SET!!”
…
And then…
Ryo: “Ah-“
A sharp pain seared the back of my neck. I immediately moved my hand to see what had happened, but I didn’t feel anything unusual. I frantically turned around in search of a wasp or something that could have stung me, but I knew it was too late for insects like that to still be active.
Ryo: “Damn…”
Whatever it was, it hurt like hell for a second. However, the pain very quickly subsided and I had to assume it was just some misfiring of pain sensations from my brain.
Ryo: “At least it snapped me out of that trance.”
Honestly… I don’t even want to say the word now. That was so weird… Come to think of it, where is-
Nijika: “Are you okay?”
Turning around once more, I’m met with Nijika, who’s back and holding a bag now.
Ryo: “…You saw that?”
Nijika: “Yeah. Does your neck hurt?”
I figured there was no point in lying to her. She’d call me out on it anyway.
Ryo: “Yeah, but only for a second. I’m okay.”
Nijika: “You sure? You know if you have any problems, no matter how small, you can confide in me, right?”
Ryo: “What are you, my mom?”
Nijika: “I’m being serious here! You try to do things on your own and then close yourself off to others when you can’t figure it out. I want you to know that you can rely on me when it gets too tough!”
Ryo: “…I’ll keep it in mind.”
It really did mean a lot to me that she said that. I was afraid of showing too much emotion though, so I ended the conversation rather fast.
Ryo: “So, what’s in the bag?”
Nijika: “Oh, you know~ Just that dress!”
Ryo: “You actually bought it?”
Nijika: “Y-You said I’d look good in it… D-Don’t take it back now…”
Ryo: “E-Eh? N-No, I still think so.”
Nijika: “I’m glad…”
She breathed a heavy sigh of relief, which only served to confuse me more. I thought she was bothered by what I said, but now she won’t let me take it back???
Ryo: “…Sorry I didn’t save up enough for the suit.”
Nijika: “Oh-hoh, did you wanna match with me?”
Ryo: “E-Eh? I-I mean…”
For the first time of the night, I was turning red, although it was out of embarrassment… She had seen through my desires.
Nijika: “Hehe, don’t worry about it~”
Ryo: “What do you-“
Before I could ask what she meant, Nijika joyfully ran in front of me and took hold of my hand.
Nijika: “L-Let’s check out the rest of the stores!”
Ryo: “U-Um…”
Nijika: “I-I don’t want you getting lost!”
This mall wasn’t big enough to get lost in… There was no reason to hold my hand… But…
Ryo: “…O-Okay. I want to go to the record shop, but other than that, just take me wherever. I… won’t let go.”
I couldn’t see it, but for some reason I knew she gave a beautiful smile at that moment.
Nijika: “Good! Let’s make your last hour of being 17 the best hour of the year!!”
And so, we explored the entire mall. Nijika really did never let go of my hand. Of course, there were little moments where one of us would pick something up to examine it, but as soon as a hand was free, she would swoop in. As much as I tried not to, I began to get used to the feeling of her hand in mine.
We went to a variety of stores. Eventually, she took me to the record store where I spent at least 10 minutes browsing. I felt kind of bad, but she didn’t seem bothered. She was even asking about the music I was looking at too. For some reason, I didn’t feel like going on my usual monologues, so I just told her about what I found interesting and she seemed to find it interesting too. They didn’t have the special edition I was searching for, so I left without any purchase, despite Nijika saying that she would buy me something.
Nijika window-shopped at quite a few places, but the only store where she actually bought anything was a home appliance store. I don’t even remember what she bought, just that it was something she needed to make a favorite dish of hers or something. Honestly, a part of me thought it was funny that an 18 year old girl was getting excited over cooking supplies, as if she were already settled down with someone, but at the same time… it made me happy to see her happy. So I kept my jokes to myself.
By the time the clock read 11:55 PM, we were outside of the mall and walking the streets. It was dark out, but the street lights made the path easy to follow. We were basically just walking down a big road with a way back to our homes at the end. I wasn’t sure of the visibility to anyone coming into this road however, so I tried to stay as close to the right as possible.
Nijika: “S-So, um…”
Ryo: “…?”
I was a little surprised. Nijika very rarely clams up by herself. She must be asking me something big right now…
Nijika: “Y-You don’t have to, but… d-do you wanna stay over tonight?”
Ryo: “Eh?”
Nijika: “W-What?”
Ryo: “I thought that was obvious.”
Nijika: “Wha- D-Don’t just assume you can stay over at my place whenever you want, dummy!”
Ryo: “But most of your room is my stuff.”
Nijika: “E-Even so!”
Ryo: “…I don’t get it.”
Nijika: “Nnnnnng, I’m gonna make you sleep on the couch!”
Ryo: “E-Eh?? Wait, let’s be reasonable-“
Come to think of it… Have I slept beside Nijika since I began to notice my feelings? Will things be different now? Maybe this is a bad idea…
Nijika: “Haah… I swear, you are something else.”
Ryo: “…Sorry.”
Nijika: “Hehe, you’re pretty cute when you’re shy like that. But, don’t worry. I like the Ryo that drives me crazy just as much.”
Ryo: “N-Nijika…”
I was beginning to turn red again. I had no idea where this sentiment that she held was coming from.
Nijika: “I’m serious. I think I had more fun tonight than I have in a long time! I really enjoyed just spending time with you.”
Ryo: “…A-As…”
I couldn’t even finish the question… I was too scared of the answer…
Nijika gave me a gentle smile in response.
Nijika: “…I’ve decided. I’m gonna be more honest. I’m sick of my own mind holding me back!!”
Nijika pulled out her phone to check the time. It was 11:59. I was moments away from becoming an ‘adult’ in the eyes of my country, though I definitely had no idea how to be one of those.
Sprinting in front of me, she let go of my hand. I was almost sad for a second. That warmth that I’d grown used to had been ripped away, but her smile quickly erased any unease I felt.
Nijika: “…It all starts now. H-“
…
Huh?
Why did she stop like that?
I blinked a few times and realized that she’d disappeared from my view. What??? Did she just… vanish?
…
Letting my mind catch up with itself, I realize that I saw a flash of light right when she got cut off. It was after that light that she disappeared from view.
Suddenly, a song started playing from my pocket. Confused, I reached in and grabbed my phone. It read 12:00 AM. It was only then that I realized the song that was playing was a MIDI-style Happy Birthday . Somehow, Ikuyo had sent me a text that would play it if I had my ringer on.
What was more strange however… was my reflection on the screen before I turned it on. I seemed to have something on my face. Reaching my hand towards it, I find a wet sensation greeting me. Pulling my hand away to my field of vision, I see that it’s some kind of red… liquid… blood? Am I bleeding? I don’t feel any worse than I did a second ago, though.
That’s when I look in front of me and finally realize the source of that bright light. It’s the headlights of a car. That car is right in front of me. It must have come in from the right, as it’s facing left. Was there an intersection here or something? Actually, the car is where Nijika was a few seconds ago.
It’s where… Nijika… was…
Then… where is…
Ryo: “Niji… ka…?”
Looking to the left, or more accurately right in front of the car… my world began to crash.
Ryo: “Nijika?”
She was lying in a dark liquid. I couldn’t tell from the street lights alone, maybe it was some kind oil from the car?
I walked closer, but for some reason could only do it in very slow steps. It’s like my body was fighting back the very concept of walking towards her. I didn’t understand why. She might be unconscious if she slipped. I need to wake her up. I don’t have a key to her house after all. And it would feel wrong to use hers while she’s asleep.
Finally close enough to step in the puddle of oil, I knelt down and lifted her shoulders up. Her head immediately fell to the side. She must be out cold.
Ryo: “Hey, Nijika.”
…
Ryo: “Nijikaaaaa.”
…
Ryo: “Aren’t you always telling me not to sleep in?”
I was hearing a strange sound ever since I lifted her up.
Dripping. Something was dripping.
Lightly resting her on the ground, I wanted to determine what it was. But as I moved my hand away, I noticed something just as strange. It had even more blood on it than when I touched my face earlier. That’s weird… I haven’t touched my face since then, so where did that blood come from?
…
I looked back down at Nijika. I noticed something else that was strange about her. Her eyes… were open. I’ve never seen her sleep like that. Is that what eyes look like when they’re sleeping? So empty? That’s… kinda creepy honestly…
…
I couldn’t put my hand down. I kept holding it in view with Nijika’s corpse sleeping body.
I couldn’t stop blinking. My eyes were trying to shut themselves for some reason. Like they didn’t want me to see something…
But in-between blinks, I noticed that one color seemed to dominate my view.
I somehow hadn’t realized it…
The color of the oil around Nijika…
And the color of the liquid on my hand…
Are the same…
But that would mean… Nijika is lying in a pool of blood…
And that would mean…
That would mean…
Ryo: “Haah Haah Haah-“
That…
Would…
Mean…
Ryo: “…Ni…ji…ka…?”
…
She’s dead.