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“Jongin, can we talk?” Kyungsoo utters nervously to the man beside him.
“What’s up?” Jongin replies calmly and stares blankly at the windows in front of them.
“You know how much I love you right? You know how much you meant to me?” the smaller man asks.
“Yeah” Jongin answers.
“We’re each other firsts and you don’t know how much that I really want to make you my last too-”.
“Kyungsoo, just say it” Jongin interrupts.
“I don’t know how to say it but. But after the failed attempt last month, I’ve been seeing a therapist and I realized that I kinda want to be better, Nini” he looks at Jongin with tears forming in his eyes but he can’t see any reaction from the man sitting beside him so he continues “and since you’re not with us anymore, it’s not healthy for me to still keeping you here” he sobbed uncontrollably.
“I’m not saying that I want you to disappear. I really want to continue this. Whatever this is. I really want you to stay by my side. We’ve been together since forever but-” Kyungsoo couldn’t finish his sentences.
“But you need to let me go. It’s time, Kyungsoo. Just let me go. I will still be here, in your heart” Jongin says lovingly.
“I just. I just don’t want to be alone, Nini” Kyungsoo whispers.
“You won’t. I will still be with you, well not physically obviously but I will be there whenever you need me. Remember what I always told you in the hospital, Soo?” Jongin said with a sad smile on his face.
Kyungsoo looks up to him and say “Don’t say it. Not now, please”.
“As long as the sun keep shining, I will always be by your side. Maybe you cannot see or listen to me anymore, but I am here” points at Kyungsoo’s chest “and here” Jongin points to Kyungsoo’s head.
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“Good morning Jongin!!” Kyungsoo screams. “I’m going to work now!! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!” he continues screaming to an empty room hoping that Jongin can hear him.
It’s been a month since he took the medication. It’s quiet now.