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When We Speak, It's Less Lonely

Summary:

Shen Yuan has lived a lonely childhood under the stern and protective care of his brother Shen Qingqiu. After becoming ill as a child and losing his hearing from a fever, he became even more alone in the world. It's only when a strange curly haired child falls into his world that he realizes he doesn't have to live so lonely anymore.

(An AU about Deaf Shen Yuan) on going and will be updated soon!

Tags and warnings likely to be updated later knowing myself it'll probably become angsty and potentially gorey, this is your warning now.

Chapter 1: With Loss, We Found New Friendship

Chapter Text

The air left Luo Binghe's lungs in a harsh wheeze as he hit the ground. The harsh impact against his shoulder seemed to vibrate all the way down to his bones. He'd be lucky if nothing was broken after this. Ming Fan towered over him, smirking as he twirled Luo Binghes precious jade pendant around his fingers. 

 

"You really need to learn how to respect your elders, you mutt! Shizun will never favor you with that poor attitude!" He snorts, before turning and throwing the jade with his full strength. Luo Binghe watched in displeasure, as the trio walked away from him laughing and hooting as if they'd told the greatest joke of all. Realistically they were just acting like a bunch of jealous assholes since Ning Ying rejected Ming Fan again. And again. And probably always will. 

 

Standing up on shaking legs, he gently touches his bruising and puffy cheek before beginning to walk in the direction his stone was throne. His heart was boiling with rage at the rough treatment received by the precious gift his mother gave him. However his head was also spinning from being beaten so thoroughly, he knew better than to run after Ming Fan and extract revenge.

 

That can come another day.

 

He limped through the woods, searching the grass desperately, before he ran into a solid wall of stone. Doubling his height with no holes to peek through, this wall was just part of a large stone fence hiding the garden of his very own shizun. Moss and and vines scaled the bricks, twisting into every available crevice. As he glanced all the way up, he felt his stomach sink as he saw the necklace he sought after dangling from the branches of a tree just over the wall. The bright green was vibrant against the budding orange fruits. 

 

He hesitated. At least if he scaled the wall now, he could be certain his shizun was in class and no where near here to lecture and potentially beat him for trespassing. No one had been allowed in his garden, not even his head disciple Ming Fan knows what the inner court looks like. The only exception was Yue Qingyuan and even his visits seemed brief and unwanted by the grumpy immortal.

 

Luo Binghe watched the necklace sway back and forth and solidified his resolve. He'd just climb up the wall, grab it quickly, and leave like nothing had ever happened.

 

….that resolve didn't stop the shaking in his arms as he climbed up the wall. Grabbing every strong root and vine that was willing to support his weight, he scaled up the wall to the top, leaning over the stone to grasp at the necklace. His fingers tips grazed the surface, just out of reach. Holding his breath he leaned forward just a little bit more, grabbing onto it with relief. 

 

….however, relaxing was a mistake. His center of gravity fumbled, causing him to fall *over the side of the wall.* gasping in shock, he squeezed his eyes closed to brace for the immense fall. 

 

… soft. The ground was soft? Like falling onto a pile of pillows. He opened his eyes in surprise, immediately looking below him to find…it was a pile of pillows. Stacked into a sort of rounded pit to keep them all together with enough room to fit several adults. Relieved he hadn't been reduced to a pile of broken bones, he crawled out of the pit only to realize he'd dropped his pendant on the fall down. Groaning, he began to search for it in the pillow pile and the surrounding grass before turning to look at the garden. 

 

It was beautiful. Shrouds of flowers lined every wall, some vining back up those stones. A rather large pond of coy fish with a running water fountain centered it all, large lotus ponds floating over the surface. An outdoor Pavillion stood tall by the pond, complete with a table and chairs and a xiongqi game board set up neatly on top. Most impressive was the large orange trees with hoards of swollen and ready to eat fruit that  created a safe canopy of branches and leaves over the garden. He hesitantly stepped forward, beginning to search around on the ground for the pendant, when his eyes fell on the form of his shizun. 

 

His whole body went shock still before he dropped to the ground in prostration.

 

"Shizun! This disciple doesn't mean to trespass! I'm so sorry! Something...something precious to me was thrown here! Please! I promise to just take it and leave!" His voice is loud despite being half muffled against the grass. He trembles as he waits for his shizuns response.

 

…..nothing is said. In fact the only thing that can be heard is the quiet flick of book pages. He hesitated, before lifting his head to look at his teacher. 

 

…..It wasn't Shen Qingqiu. 

 

It certainly looked like him. But he was quite a bit younger than his shizun. Maybe thirteen or fourteen. His eyes however were a soft jade where the immortal masters were a dark green. His hair was that same silky black, tied loosely at the ends into a braid and long enough to drag on the floor if he was walking. Thin, nimble fingers flicked through his book, consumed by his literature, his elbows propped on his knees as he sits under the orange tree. 

 

"U-um….." Binghe stammered. "E-excuse me…shidi? I'm sorry to have interrupted you, I'm just looking for something that was thrown in here….if that's ok?"

 

…….he remained ignored. Luo Binghe felt a bitter taste rise in his throat as he pulled himself to his feet again. Whoever this shidi was, it was clear he too had no intention of acknowledging Luo Binghe just as his….father? 

 

Binghe bit his tongue. There's no way shizun had a son. Right?

 

He sighed. If the shizun-looking-shidi was content ignoring him then he'll continue his search. At least when he tattles to shizun later, he'll have recovered his precious jade. Looking back up in the orange tree that the smaller boy was leaned up against, he sees a small shimmering glint in the tree. He rubs his palms together and comes around from behind the tree, jumping up to grip onto the rough bark as he climbed back up. The branches creaked as he drew higher and higher, and he found himself quickly disappointed when the sparkling artifact turned out to be a glass windchime. It's tinkling sound was almost a mocking laugh. He sighed, beginning to descend when the branch under his foot snapped, sending him plummeting to the ground.

 

He landed next to the boy with a loud thud, earning a surprised yelp from the child, who raised his book over his head in shock as he stared down at Luo Binghe.

 

Shen Yuan's heart hammered in his chest. The sensation of a heavy drop had rippled against his side and suddenly a curly haired boy was within his peripheral vision. Hesitantly, he lowered his book as he watched the boy dust himself off, sitting up. His eyes were flooding with tears and frustration. While part of him felt the need to immediately comfort him, he also was hyper cautious. None of his brother's students had ever been allowed into the private garden, did he sneak in?!

 

The boy turned and caught his gaze, his deep brown eyes widening when he found Shen Yuan staring at him. Immediately, his mouth began to move so quickly, Shen Yuan couldn't make out the words he was forming. Becoming overwhelmed he placed his hands over the child's mouth.

 

"S-slow down I don't understand….." He tried his best to speak the words, his voice thick with lack of use and even then he wasn't sure if he'd even said it correctly.

 

Luo Binghe blinked in surprise, his lips smashed against the boy's palms. He had spoken so slowly and it was hoarse and hard to understand. He nodded slowly, watching him draw his hands back to free his mouth. He thinks for several minutes before speaking again.

 

"Are you….um….you can't….understand me?" He watches those green eyes train onto his lips, before he looks back up at him and points to his ears, then moves his hands into strange motions.

 

"I can't hear you, I'm deaf." He speaks again slowly, moving his hands to sign his words though realistically he knew this kid probably couldn't understand sign language, it was still a habit.

 

Luo Binghe startles, then becomes ashamed by his reaction, and quickly turns his face away. He wasn't sure how to react. He'd never met anyone deaf before. 

 

"I-I see I'm sorry!"

 

This earned him a soft and playful punch.

 

"I'm deaf! I can't read your mouth if you look away!" Shen Yuan snorts, seeing the boys red expression. The curly haired disciple looked back at him and began speaking once more.

 

"I don't really understand what you're saying…….its too…muffled." Luo Binghe admits. The boy touches his chin in thought, before glancing around. He really couldn't understand Binghe well either other than the obvious confusion and embarrassment on his face. Glancing around the garden, he quickly retrieves his sketch book and a piece of charcoal. His hands move quickly as he motions for Binghe to sit down with him on the grass.

 

After a few moments he flips the sketch book around, tapping the page.

 

[Who are you? Why are you in my garden?]

 

Luo Binghe takes the offered charcoal, before writing back quickly. His handwriting wasn't anywhere near as pretty as his counterpart.

 

[My name is Luo Binghe. I'm looking for my necklace, I lost it]

 

He saw the boys nose scrunch with doubt and he quickly wrote a clarification

 

[It got thrown over the wall. I saw it hang in the tree but it fell from there too.]

 

The boy was thoughtful for several moments before taking the charcoal stick back and writing again.

 

[My name is Shen Yuan.] 

 

He then puts the writing piece down before pointing to himself. After a moment he curls his hand into a fist and extends his first finger and thumb together, twisting his hand back and forth. He looks at Luo Binghe expectantly. Clumsily, he tries to imitate the gesture Shen Yuan just made, pointing to himself. Shen Yuan shook his head and took Luo Binghes hand, drawing it to his chest. He mouthed "me" before showing him the hand gesture again. This time he helped move Luo Binghes fingers into the right position and once he was satisfied with the motion Luo Binghe made he wrote again eagerly.

 

[That's my sign nickname. It means green]

 

He looked pretty content with Luo Binghe, squeezing his hands together with excitement. Luo Binghe stole the charcoal back.

 

[That suits you. Is there a way to say my name in sign?]

 

[...there is! But nicknames are faster signs. Easier to use.] 

 

He seems to think for a moment before turning to Luo Binghe before gently poking his chest and signing something. Luo Binghe imitated the motion the best he could before giving him a confused expression.

 

"Is that my name?"

 

[No. It means Tangerine. Since you fell out of the tree like one of the fruits.]

 

Luo Binghe flushed red, struck between embarrassment and happiness. It felt nice to be given a nickname. And when Shen Yuan laughed it was quiet and breathy, giving himself a sense of lightness too. 

 

[I can help you look for your necklace, but you have to leave before my brother comes back]

 

"OK! Thank you shidi!" He chirped but then realized Shen Yuan wasn't looking at him…or heard him. Obviously. Cleaning his throat from embarrassment, he wrote his grateful response on the paper before jumping up to his feet again. 

 

The two boys combed the garden carefully, Shen Yuan even wading into the water of the pond to see if it had slipped down amongst the lotus. Unfortunately after two hours of thorough searching, they came out empty handed.

 

Shen Yuan frowned, signing with frustration to Luo Binghe who didn't understand a word. He scratched the back of his head and grabbed their writing materials again for him.

 

[That's so bothersome. Where could it have gone?!]

 

[It's alright Shidi, maybe I'm too worn out to look close enough]

 

[Do you want to come back tomorrow and look again?] 

 

Luo Binghe nodded eagerly, slightly bowing to Shen Yuan as a thanks.

 

[I'd appreciate it shidi. I'd really like to find it.]

 

[Okay. Come back tomorrow at the same time, gege won't be home then.]

 

[Who is your brother? Exactly?]

 

Luo Binghe had theories but he didn't want to jump to conclusions. Shen Yuan paused as the stone pillars around the garden started faintly glowing and flickering with green energy. He paled and ripped the sheet of paper from his sketchbook, shoving it into Luo Binghes arms as he pushed him towards the garden wall. Although Luo Binghe wasn't sure why Shen Yuan was suddenly pushing him up and over the wall, he couldn't exactly ask in this moment or argue. Once he was safely over the ledge, he crouched down to watch Shen Yuan rush to assume his position under the tree, lifting his book as if distracted.

 

Luo Binghe watched in shock, his heart threaded with anxiety as he watches Shen Qingqiu glide across the garden towards Shen Yuan. The lofty immortal frowned, reaching over to tap another stone pillar a couple of times, making the stones flicker again with green energy. Shen Yuan looked up at the bright pillars as if it just snatched his attention, then turned to look at his brother, rushing to put his book down and cross over to his sibling. 

 

Shen Qingqius hands moved gracefully as he spoke, signing each word with precision.

 

"A-Yuan, you didn't come greet me?"

 

(Sorry gege, I didn't see the lights at first, I was reading)

 

"I see. I got worried when you didn't come over, you never miss saying hi when I return." His eyes flick over to the forgotten book then back to his little brother.

 

"Don't tell me you've been reading all day instead of studying?"

 

Shen Yuan looks sheepish, folding his hands behind his back as Shen Qingqiu started to sign faster in a scolding manner. Luo Binghe watched the scene carefully, shocked that his Shizun could look so….gentle and caring. Even though he was annoyed with Shen Yuan, he still maintained a calm expression. Having decided he's intruded on their privacy enough, he slowly descends the wall and makes his way back to his shed. As he lays down on the bed of straw, he unfolds the crumpled page, reading the conversation over and over again, even practicing the little nickname signs he'd been taught.

 

His heart squeezed happily at the thought of tomorrow.