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Listen, I just wanted to protect my cute little Mitsu from a city boy. I hadn't expected to face myself from the past in one of my niece's classmates. One that was stalking her, nonetheless.
Okay. Maybe I wasn't any better. I put on my best idol disguise: black cap and sunglasses, even a black t-shirt. I called off work, and stalked my niece through the Tokyo Zoo.
But then again. Middle-schoolers can be... naive, to say the least. Not that it’s their fault. And if a big city boy thought he could take advantage of my niece, oh, he'd have another thing coming. But what if he wasn't? What if it was just a nice and innocent hang-out at the zoo between kids? I refuse to be the overbearing aunt who prohibits hanging out with boys. I also refuse to let my niece get her feelings shattered. How do you shelter someone you love? Someone you want to be able to live without ever being hurt, deceived, knowing that there's nothing you can do to stop it? Is this the foolish hope of love? She's a bright light, and I will always hope no one ever dims it. Then what do I do? Stalk my niece at a zoo, apparently. Oh, the joys of motherhood. Aunthood.
And that's when I spotted her. I'd just gotten through the gates, and there she was. Another kid, the same age as Mitsu. She was hiding behind a tree, and had a cute hat and tinted glasses to cover up, just like me. And she stared intently at my niece and that boy, like she wanted to drill holes through their skulls. I almost shuddered. But something about her made me approach.
I walked up behind her and told her: "You one of her classmates?"
Yeah! I don't know what came over me! God, thinking back, she could have just screamed and called me a creep. Then I would have been spotted by Mitsu and got a lifetime ban from the Ueno Zoo! Not that I would have any interest in going. Mh, well, it's a nice date spot from what I hear. Still, I could have been arrested! I really don't know what came over me.
Thankfully, she must have wanted To stay hidden just like me, so she didn't scream, instead, she just hissed an excuse:
“N-! N-! No!I’m totally here on my own! But I remembered they said something about visiting Ueno Zoo today and BAM! There they were! Weird, huh? AH HA HA HA!”
To be fair, I stopped listening halfway through. Because the boy turned to the side and I could see him clearly! The famous Shima-kun! Yeah, yeah, he really was the middle school equivalent of some sort of handsome actor! I was taken aback, no wonder my Mitsu was smitten by him!
Now, the girl, understandably, got a bit suspicious. I could feel a menacing aura like some sort of videogame off her, heh. She asked who I was. And, I’m not going to lie, my mind started to spin. I had not expected the possibility of meeting one of Mitsu’s little friends. Had she told them that her aunt is biologically a male? Had she even told them that she was staying with an aunt? To make things worse. Or, well, actually, a bit more simple, I had pulled my hair under my cap, no make-up on. Well, a bit of concealer. Now that I think about it, the girl looked quite knowledgeable in fashion, maybe she noticed. Anyway, I just told her that Mitsumi was my niece (nice save, right?) and showed her my insurance card. She seemed to calm down right away, and actually trust me a bit. Told me her name was Mika Egashira. Poor girl was following her classmates at the zoo, no kid wants or deserves that. Maybe deep down she was glad someone was there with her.
We followed them around. She was actually a great help, y'know. Like, she knew Shima-kun personally, and she could give me a very precious look into the life inside the classroom without me needing to hound my niece. I really hit the jackpot, finding another stalker. She denied it, of course. Said that she wanted to go to the zoo and then just so happened to recall at the last minute that Shima-kun and my niece had also mentioned they were going. Sure. A pretty girl like her, dressed in the latest trends like she was going on a date, deciding to spend the morning at the zoo, alone. I mean, not that I needed to read her like that. Her beet red face and stammering did all the talking. She was just the cutest. Reminded me a lot of myself.
I mean... I wish she hadn't. I saw her. The way she looked at them with a deep jealousy inside. Her mind was racing one hundred miles an hour. I knew she wanted to be in my niece's place, enjoying a carefree morning at the zoo. I could see she didn’t want to be the type of person to think about her every move, about everyone's moves ten steps ahead. What deep insecurities must lie under that latest-trend bucket hat and impeccable outfit. I would know. If she believed herself to be worthy, smart, pretty, if she truly believed that, she wouldn't be stalking two classmates at the zoo. Oh, the deep, deep sorrow that must be buried in her heart. I saw her, and I saw a little girl that looked like a boy, sitting on the beach of a small, suffocating town, gazing at the waves, thinking about what she would do that summer.
I asked her, you know. At one point, I couldn't hold it in anymore. The boy wasn't even holding my niece's hand. They really looked like friends. Like the perfect picture of the carefree nature of youth. The boy did have a sort of sad twinkle in his eye. But it wasn't directed at my niece. Therefore, not my problem. I'm going off track, so, like I said. I asked her. I was like: "You don’t think he’s playing with my Mitsu’s heart, do you?!". I know, I know. I don't know what came over me. It's one thing to follow at a distance, but to meddle directly by talking to her classmate!
I knew what she wanted to say for a moment, that oh, yes, he was certainly playing her. I know that venom that builds up in your heart when you can't look at yourself as a worthy being. But she stopped herself. At that moment, I was so proud of that girl I didn't even know. She looked to the side and just said: "He wouldn’t do that". And if I wasn’t convinced enough by her strong gaze, she repeated, “Ever”.
Look, my heart basically melted. She blushed so deeply. It was clear that she liked the boy. That she was racking her brain, thinking of why everything she did, all the effort she put into looking her best, keeping up with trends, always snatching the opportunity for conversation, had not been enough.
Oh, don't look at me like that. Yes, okay, I admit. Maybe there's a bit of projection. But I could feel it, y'know? It was like looking in a mirror. I wanted to reach into her soul and show her my life, the way my path was so similar to hers. To show her that it's going to be okay, but that she has to let go. Let go of her walls, of seeing every action and reaction like moves on a chess board. I wanted to shake her shoulders and shake all of that away. It's like the thing I was saying about my niece, you see. I felt so protected in that moment, wanting to banish all insecurity from her heart right then and there. Even though I knew it wasn't possible, I don't know, part of me still hoped that getting her away from them, letting her pick a nice dessert and just talk would be enough to ease her burdens. But alas, I was just a stranger. And, okay. Maybe a bit of a silly one. I immediately asked her if she liked him, heh. She immediately went: “Nooo! I wouldn’t say I like him… but I want a high school boyfriend who’s really extra”. She’s trouble, that one, so feisty.
I know she'll be alright. I was. I could see the kindness and care in her heart, even if she's buried it for now. My niece is a kind girl that could get a rock out of its shell. And from what she's reporting back home, her class seems like a treat. I know Mika-chan will be alright. In time, just know it. Still, it would be nice to think that she let go even just a tiny bit. I'd love for my niece to bring her home sometimes. I could be her mentor, I've always wanted to be a mentor. Heh.
What are you… are you implying that I have too much on my plate already? You… you asshole!