Chapter Text
Mike had gotten a letter from one Elizebert Megafig, a world-renowned, well lunatic. She reached out to him in search of someone to tell her story. Mike, working at G.N.N. immediately agreed of course.
Ok almost made it, he thought to himself. He could smell a storm on the way, the wind picking up. He had difficulty just keeping the ship on course. Before he could properly get to the island a large flying beast comes over to his ship knocking the map out of his hands, and him off his ship. He hits the ground hard. Was that thing talking , Mike thought to himself.
He walked, jumping over a fallen log, a spider-like creature skittering down the tunnel chittering “fryder, fryder, fryder.” quickly.
“The hell.. I knew this place was going to be weird but Jesus.” He says to himself as he walks, coming up on a rickety old bridge. “God this bridge looks like it's about to break under a feather..”
He begins walking across it, the bridge buckling underneath him. “Shit!” He runs across it jumping at the last second just barely making onto the land. “Fuck the gods really don't want me here huh..?”
He stands at the edge of a cliff watching as the flying creature flies above him. It looks like a big gooey moth, at least that’s all he can think about the thing before the ground he stood on gave out beneath him. It feels like it almost happens in slow motion as he falls it feels almost too familiar, a feeling he never wanted to revisit. One where no one was there to save him this time.
“Wow, that's your new lead, another monster hunt? Do you have any idea how much trouble you caused me? I had to recall half a million papers and give a public apology all because your Bigfoot turned out to be a lost football mascot” One C. Clumby Clumbernut told him after watching the reel Elizbert Megafig had sent him.
She puts a hand over her eyes sighing in an exasperated way, “We've been over this it doesn't matter how eye-catching your articles are if i'm stuck cleaning up your sloppy work!” She slams a hand on the desk, Mike flinches back.
“You're already out of second chances Mr. Wheeler,” She slams both fists on the desk again giving some of her knick knacks air time, “and now you're gonna follow elizabeth to some God forsaken island elizabeth megafig is either a con artist or a lunatic remember that whole mess with Atlantis this bug snacks thing is just her latest delusion.” She finished angrily giving him an unspoken permission to speak after her rant.
“Come on Mrs, Why don’t you believe in Bugsnax?” Mike pleaded.
“Because I've got a working brain!” She yells at him.
“What is so wrong about Snaxtooth?” Mike questions.
“Do your research, ships go missing around there all the time. The place is like me before I get my coffee. Deadly.” Clumby tells him.
“Fine What do you know about Lizbert?”
“She got a little famous after stumbling across some forgotten civilization in Pennsylvania; she's been coasting off that success ever since.” She says, obviously annoyed at the conversation.
“Well I’m going.” Mike states firmly. He needed this one big story. That’s all he needed. No matter how crazy it was.
“This is absurd, only a desperate loser would follow Lizbert! Well I guess it is a tantalizing story if true we'll just have to hear it from Lizbert herself. say you get an interview with her and make it back alive you just might keep your job.” Clumby relents.
Mike nods excitedly, “Of course yes ma’am!”
She sighs and continues, “now get going and try not to fall off a cliff or something.”
He wakes up to a small strawberry creature staring at him. He stares at it for a second before it gets scared and scatters from the scene. He groans. “How in the fuck did my boss predict me falling off a cliff.” He talks to himself as he gets up from the ground, his entire body protesting the action.
He begins to walk down the way, his eyes landing on another person laying in the grass groaning slightly. He walked over to them. Had they fallen off a cliff as well? Standing over them slightly he asks, “Are you ok..?”
The blue haired boy speaks out in a daze. “Lizbert is th- is that you..? Oh thank god you’re alive.. Too bad I’m dying though.” The man chuckles to himself. Ok delirious, that's not good, Mike noted to himself.
“Who are you..?” Mike asks him hoping to not startle the other.
“What? Wha- it, It’s me, Filbo.” The prone man says in a confused manner. This guy really thought Mike was the expedition leader.
“What happened Filbo?”
“Oh I was, uh out looking for you, but, uh I got hungry and I couldn’t catch any Bugsnax and-” Filbo kinda trailed off, having a hard time keeping his thoughts together.
“Filbo, stay with me here, Where is Lizbert?”
“What? That’s a weird question, Lizbert…” Filbo tilted his head at the question.
“Alright. Moving on. You look out of it, when was the last time you ate?”
“Uh bout.. About a week ago.. Wambus has ketchup plants, but uh he refused to give me any..” Filbo admitted quietly. He looked over at the black haired journalist. “Wait a minute.. You aren't Lizbert..”
“Ya, no. I'm not. I'm Mike, Lizbert asked for me.” Mike hoped that would jog the blue haired man’s memory.
“Oh ya! The Journalist! How could I forget? I'm so sorry. I'm admittedly a bit out of it. Uhm could you get me something to eat..?” Filbo asked sheepishly.
Mike nods, holding out his hand, pulling the other up onto their feet. “Sure. What kind of food is around here?”
“Well bugsnax, and sauce plants mostly. You can scan them with the snaxscope provided by Lizbert in your invite.” Filbo says, pointing over to a rustling bush. “I can’t seem to catch them myself, I've got really bad hand to eye coordination.”
“Alright.” Mike nods using the snakscope to scan a little creature that was skittering in and out of the bush. A very simple Snak, watch its walking patterns. The scope reads along with a little icon of something titled love.
“A Strabby..? What's that?” Mike turns away from the camera-like item turning to the other freckled boy who was leaning on him.
“Oh those are easy to catch, even I can on a good day!” Filbo says excitedly. “Here, this snaktrap will allow you to pick up snaks. Just watch it's walking pattern and put the trap on it.” He gives Mike something that seems like a watch, yet it has a set of buttons, and an L.E.D. on the front. “You press that button,” He points to the pink button, “and it'll open and close the trap. Go ahead and try.”
Mike nods, leaning Flibo on a rock nearby. Going over, setting the trap down as the strabby ran into the bush in fear. “Yikes, sorry for scaring you little guy..”
“Alright just wait until it comes out of the bush and then just press the button, pretty simple. If you don't suck..” Mike nods, walking back over to Filbo, waiting for the small creature to exit its hiding spot.
After a moment of waiting the creature walks out of the bush going back to its pattern. Mike’s snax-watch lights up a light blue color, Mike presses the button, the trap closing around the strabby.
“Nice, pick it up before it escapes.” Filbo instructs, Mike nods doing as he’s told. Handing the trap back to Filbo. “Thanks!”
Filbo pulls the strabby out of the trap, handing the actual trap back to mike. “You can keep it, it'll get more use with you than with me. Oh by the way uh the way you have to eat bugsnax is a tad bit odd. Basically you have to eat them whole and raw or they begin rotting at a rapid rate. Since you'll be on the island for at least a little bit it'll be good for you to know.”
Mike nods, “Thanks for telling me.” Filbo grins at Mike, Mike had a feeling that it was rare for people to compliment him.
“Whelp down the hatch.” Filbo says swallowing the Strabby whole, after a moment his flesh on his arm seems to almost melt off revealing a new strawberry almost paw.
“S-strawberry arm! What?” Mike exclaims, taking a step back slightly.
“Oh, this? Pretty neat, huh? It’s a side-effect of eating bugsnax! Anywho I'm still recovering, do you think you could catch maybe three more bugsnax for me? I’m sure the scope will come in handy! Scan and plan, I always say'' Filbo tells him, brushing off the fact his arm is no longer his arm.
“Uh sure buddy.” Mike says awkwardly before getting out of his head and going around to check for more of these odd characters.
He notices a flying creature above him scanning it with intrigue. Latches onto sanx and traps with its upsettingly long tongue, the scope said this time, right so don’t grab it’s attention.
“Hmm..” He shakes his head, that one was going to be too difficult to catch right now. He begins looking around searching for other snacks to give to his weaker companion. He finds another two other strabbys and a rootle. A long carrot-like bugsnax that burrows when scared. He catches two of the Rootles and one more Strabby, but not before the Lollive decides it would be really cool to steal his trap. Thankfully he was able to continue on and feed Filbo.
He hands the snax to Filbo where he was sitting on the rock still trying to keep the world from spinning from lack of food in his system. “Here ya go man. This should help I hope.”
Filbo looks over to him with a large grin, “thanks buddy!” He eats the other three snax. His other lower arm becomes another strawberry arm and Mike can’t see what happened with the Rootles. “Woah. Getting your legs turned into food is a little weird.” Well that explains that then.
“Right, are you feeling better at least?” Mike asks with concern.
“Yup! Thanks buddy! Let’s get you back to Snaxburg!” Filbo says excitedly.
“Snaxburg? That’s your expedition’s town, right? That’s what Lizbert said in her message to me, I think..” Mike questioned hesitantly.
“Yup! At least, It was. before a lot of things happen.” Filbo said as they walked towards wherever they were going, Mike didn't really know.
Flibo clears away some brush walking towards another man, a real farmer type. He has dark blue hair covered mostly by a straw hat, he’s tending to some sort of plant. Most likely preparing for the oncoming storm.
“Hey Wambus!” The mayor calls excitedly, “How’s the farm?”
“You're still alive? Thought you’d starve to death by now.” The farmer, Wambus, states ignoring the blue-haired mayor’s question.
“Nope!” Filbo gestures over to Mike, “I found a Journalist! They’re also pretty good at hunting Bugsnaxs!” He explains before continuing, “I was gonna bring them back to Snaxburg.”
“That’s nice.” Wambus says before returning to plowing his field ignoring the other two people.
“Uhm don’t you want to come too?” Filbo stammers out.
“No.”
“Uhm Why not?” Filbo questioned hesitantly.
“I've got my hands full with my ketchup crop. Without Lizbert to catch bugsnax, I gotta keep us all fed.” He explains, Mike notices that Wambus is a very straight to the point guy, not very emotionally inept if he had to guess.
“We can’t just eat ketchup..” Filbo points out.
“Well it’s better than nothing. You want us to die out here!” Wabus exclaimed angrily.
“No! No, but uh this garden is just so far away from everybody… maybe you could restart the one in town? Call this one quits?” Filbo suggests. Definitely the wrong choice of words from just the little Mike had seen from Wambus.
“I don’t quit.” Wambus says sternly, turning away from Filbo, towards his crop, “and take a ketchup for the road.” Wambus throws the picked ketchup plant straight onto Filbo’s face. The mayor takes it and wipes the ketchup from his eyes so he can see.