Chapter Text
“This stinks.” Saki flopped back on the couch, almost dropping her phone onto the floor.
“Oh? What is it?” Nagisa chimed back from the kitchen.
“Nothing.” Saki set her phone on the ground, Milika’s latest video still playing.
“Oh alright. Is it nothing you want to talk about though?” Nagisa asked as she walked over to sit next to Saki.
She’s just too good. “I just… you know how Milika just up and kissed him? Like took his first kiss. I just…” she clenches her fists, “It makes me mad even though he didn’t really even feel anything. Like he only remembers it happened because it did, not because it was good or anything… and… and what if that’s how my first kiss with him ends up?” I can’t believe I said it. Now she can--
“I don’t know what it's like to kiss someone, but I think that if you really care about them then it would be better and memorable even if it isn’t a good kiss.”
“But I don’t want it to be bad. I want him to remember it and like not just because it happened like Milika’s.” and everything I’ve read online just says that its not something you can just be good at, that you need to just practice and that is NOT an option for a first kiss.
Nagisa sighs, “I know what you mean. I think about it too and I want my first kiss with Naoya to be amazing and memorable and I.. I know what you mean.” she glanced down at her hands. “Online everyone says that it really isn’t that important and that you’ll get better, but I am so bad at everything until I work at it, what if I’m never any good at kissing you know?”
Saki felt her stomach drop, I’d never even thought of that. She has such a hard time with everything of course this wouldn’t be any different. “I’m sure that you’ll be fine. I mean, like kissing isn’t the only thing that you want to do with him is it?” OH GOD WHAT AM I SAYING
“No, its not” Nagisa’s cheeks turn red, “but what if I’m bad at all that too?” She turned to look straight into Saki’s eyes, “What if after all of this I just.. I can’t ever really be closer to him?” as she finished talking she looks down at her hands
SO SAD! SO CUTE! Still ouch. Hadn't thought about that. Flashed through Saki’s mind, “I don’t think you have much to worry about there. You umm…” Saki’s eyes wandered from her face to her neck, collar bones, chest and down to her narrow waist, “Yeah I don’t think you have anything to worry about there.” She’s just so damn sexy what the hell do I even have going for me. Saki glanced down at her own body, I mean I guess I’m like the fit athletic type. And he did say he like boobs of all sizes… Saki clenched her fist at the thought, “ARRRRgggg. Why is he like that?” Saki pushed her hair back grabbing handfuls of it.
Nagisa looked up from her lap, “Saki?”
“Sorry. Didn't mean to be so loud.” She sat up and picked up her phone, setting it on the end table. “Just hes… he just says things you know? Like and they’re sometimes the right things and sometimes not but like he just.. Says the dumbest thing. But like look at you. You’re gorgeous. Your eyes, your whole face really. And your body is unfair. Like totally unfair. Delicate waist, smooth skin, and huge..” she trailed off as Nagisa smiled and blushed and looked away. “Yeah you’ve got nothing to worry about.”
“Thanks.” She was smiling and looking at her feet. After a moment she snaps upright “WAIT SAKI! YOU!”
“Me what?”
“Kissing!” Nagisa’s eyes lit up. And she took Saki’s hands in her’s, scooting in closer.
What is she talking about? “Yeah?” Saki waited.
“US! SO THAT OUR FIRST TIME WITH NAOYA IS GOOD!” Nagisa looked up at Saki, her eyes almost glowing.
“I don’t think I follow.” What is she talking about? Why is she doing that thing with her face when she wants something? What does she- “OH.” Saki blushed and looked to the side. I don't know. Would that work? Is kissing a girl the same as kissing a boy? What if I don’t like kissing? What if I get so good at kissing that Naoya feels like he’s not good enough? What if-
“sorry.” Nagisa let Saki’s hands fall. “I just thought that since neither of us could have his first kiss, maybe just that we could make our first kisses with him special.”
She looks so cute even when she’s sad . “You have a point.” Saki looked back up at Nagisa. I really really don’t want to screw that up “But like, would you even be ok with kissing me?”
“Well, I wouldn’t mind,” Nagisa blushed even harder somehow and smiled, “and I think that Naoya wouldn’t mind if we were kissing either.”
How can she just say that? He would think its hot though, perv. Saki took in a long breath to steady herself, but how different could kissing a girl be? Like everyone has lips right? “Ok. so. How do we… you know start this? Should we look up how to kiss? Cuz I don’t even know what to do with my hands and like what should I-”
She froze as Nagisa leaned up and kissed her, a little peck on the lips.
“I see what Naoya meant.” I did not see that coming. Wow she just like went for it.
“Was it bad?” her voice cracked as she looked down.
“No, I just. It was sudden and unexpected and like I think I was just not sure what to expect and I don't know.” THAT WAS MY FIRST KISS AND I DON’T HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT IT FELT LIKE !
“Want me to try again?” Nagisa was fidgeting with her skirt.
Saki took a deep breath. It’s just for Naoya , “Yeah.”
“Okay!” Nagisa steadied herself, “Here we go.” She leaned up and kissed Saki again.
This isn’t so bad. Wow, even her lips are soft. And her hair smells nice and her face looks nice and - Saki’s thoughts trailed off as Nagisa pulled away.
“How was that one?”
“Good? I think.” Saki tried to think more about the kiss, “I guess I don’t know what I was expecting. But that was nice. I think.” Was it? I still have no idea. But it wasn’t bad, that's for sure. “Okay.” she let out a quick breath, “I guess I go now.” Where do my hands go? Where did her hands go?Are my lips chapped? She ran her tongue over her lips quickly to check, no they’re good. Okay. just do it. JUST GO FOR IT! JUST LEAN IN AND KISS HER. FOR NAOYA! Saki leaned in, setting her hand on Nagisa’s waist and pressed her lips to Nagisa’s. There was the smallest pop as she pulled away. “Okay. how was that?”
Nagisa paused, thinking, “I see what you mean. I don’t know. I liked your hand. I think that was good. What did I do with mine?”
“I dunno. I just put mine there to get it out of the way.” Do boys even have a waist to hold?
“I think your hand was good.” She pulled her phone out of the pocket in her skirt and took a note.
“Are you taking notes?” She is def taking notes.
“Yeah, I don’t want to forget what works. Here,” she set her phone down and placed her hand on Saki’s waist before leaning in and kissing her again.
Hand is good. God her lips are soft. As she pulled away Saki shivered, that was weird , “Okay. hand good. What else?”
“Hmmm I think whatever you did with your lips that made that little pop when you kissed me was better than whatever I am doing, I guess just pressing my lips to yours.”
THINK SAKI WHAT DID YOU DO? “Okay, let me try again.” her brain raced through mostly the same thoughts. she licked her lips, took a deep breath, put her hand on Nagisa’s waist and leaned in to kiss her. Their lips stayed together longer this time, so soft was all Saki could think before pulling away.
“I think you wet your lips? It kinda made them almost stick to mine. I guess that means I need chapstick.”
“Did I?” Do I need chapstick? Are my lips just that dry? Do I lick my lips constantly without knowing it?
“I think you did. I think its good.” Nagisa glanced down at Saki’s hand still on her waist, “Were you going to try again?”
Saki looked at her hand. Why did I leave it there? “Yeah. what do I do with the other one?” she tried putting it on the other side of Nagisa’s waist. “I don’t think here.”
Nagisa looked slightly to the side, thinking, “I think try,” she took Saki’s hand in hers and guided it up to her cheek, “Here?” she was blushing.
“And then do I just kiss the same way again?” Why is she blushing? I’m the one holding her face .
“Yeah, I think so. Let’s see how this goes.”
Saki took a breath to steady herself. God her cheek is soft too. And warm. I think hand on face is good. For me atleast. I wonder if its good for her too? Leaning in she kissed her again, using the hand on Nagisa’s face to turn her chin up slightly to line their lips up better. I think this is good. This is definitely better. As they parted she could see Nagisa’s whole face was red even her ears a little. “Hand on face good?”
“Yeah” her voice cracked a little, “Hand on face good. Is good.” she squeaked out her correction before picking up her phone and making another note. “So hands covered, wetting lips is good. I feel like we should be moving our lips more maybe? And tongue. We are supposed to do something with that too.”
How does she just say these things? Saki could feel how red her face was. I don’t think I'm ready for this. How would you even use your tongue in a kiss… her mind began to wander to things she had watched while searching for similar information.
“Saki, I think looking up what we should be doing with our lips might be a good idea.” She connected her phone to the TV, “There now we can both see.”
NO! Oh no no no no no-
Nagisa hopped online and, in what felt like slow motion typed in ‘KISSING LESSONS’ and ‘LIPS’ and ‘TONGUE’. She turned and smiled at Saki as she hit enter. After what seemed like ages she asked “Are you alright?”
“Oh yeah totally fine.” I AM NOT FINE HOW CAN SHE JUST LOOK AT THIS STUFF? “Umm Nagisa?”
“Yeah?”
“I don’t think you’re going to get quite the results that you are looking for searching like that.” Trust me I know, but don’t ask how.
“Oh?” Nagisa turned back and froze as the search results loaded, “OH. oh no.” lots of videos, none of the instructional videos like she had wanted.
“Yeah the internet can be a little…” ITS FULL OF PERVERTS THAT POST EVERYTHING .
Nagisa paused, “What if a little further down there is something useful-” she cut herself off and somehow became even more red as one of the videos started auto-playing.
Saki looked away, but stole glances back at the screen as Nagisa tried desperately to disconnect her phone. Is that even something normal people do? How would something like that… she looked down at her hips and gulped. What if…
“OKAY!” Nagisa was almost the color of Saki’s hair, “LETS JUST TRY TO FIGURE IT OUT OURSELVES.”
Saki sighed relieved, “Yeah we figured out some of it. We can figure out the rest too.” HOLY SHIT WHY DID SHE SEARCH LIKE THAT?
“Hands on waist and face and lips wet and lets see what else we need to do!” she let loose a nervous laugh, “Suppose I am up!”
“If you want we can try to take a break-”
“I am fine and we only have a little longer before Naoya gets back with the groceries.”
I really don’t think-
Nagisa gently laid her hand on Saki’s cheek and pulled her downwards into her lips.
This is nice. Saki leaned into the kiss, flicking her tongue out without thinking, dragging it quickly across her lips and Nagisa’s lower lip.
Nagisa let loose a very small moan and pulled away. “OH that was very good. What was that?”
WHAT DID I DO? Saki thought desperately, lips chapped kiss good, her hand on my face, I leaned in, I LICKED HER LIP trying to make mine better . “I think I um…” Saki trailed off for a moment wait what noise did she make? I liked that maybe? Oh no what am I am I some sort of perv that gets off on the noises other people make when they’re kissing? Is this like when I saw them hug? Am I the freaky one in this mess of a relationship? “I think I might have licked your lip a little? Mine are just chapped and I think I do it without thinking and I think i might have done it-”
Nagisa made a note, “do that one again please, this time i’ll be more ready for it. That way I can figure out what I should be doing. Also leaning into the kiss like that is very good I think. Taking charge like that is definitely very you.”
“Ha ha yeah” Saki ran one hand through her hair, breaking eye contact with Nagisa, “yeah lets try that again.” WHAT AM I DOING? And what does she mean “taking charge is very you.” Is that a good thing?
“I think this time could you,” she pulled Saki’s hand to the back of her head, just over the nape of her neck, “and i think pull me in. I think that would suit you well? And do the thing with your tongue too. I think that we both probably need to learn to kiss in slightly different ways? Like you’re confident and strong and I am not really so I think that we probably should kiss Naoya more like, you know, ourselves?”
Saki nodded. That makes sense.
“Oh wait, Naoya's taller than you. I should '' she got up on her knees so she was kneeling in front of Saki as she sat, “There. I think now you pull me in for the kiss.”
Saki nodded, placed her hand on Nagisa’s waist while her other ran up her back to rest on the back of her neck. She closed her eyes as she pulled Nagisa in, imagining Naoya looking down at her as she kissed him. Her lips met Nagisa’s and she tried to use her tongue just a little like before but it was tricky since the angle was different and she hadn’t meant to do it, but the kiss was excellent. Nagisa let out another soft little moan and Saki pulled her in a little tighter before pulling away. I could get used to that. That was good.
Nagisa let loose a shaky breath. “okAY!” she glanced at Saki’s hand still on her waist. “I think we figured out what you should be doing when you kiss him. That was very good. I think you might just be good at kissing you know?” She was beet red. “Okay. I am going to get back to getting things prepped up so that as soon as he gets home I can get dinner started”
“Yeah good idea.” WHAT WAS THAT? “I think I will get the laundry hung up. I know Naoya normally does it but I think I want to just stay on the couch with him after dinner tonight” Should I try to go for it tonight? To kiss him like that? What if he thinks I’ve been cheating on him and that’s how I learned to kiss. What if he wants to do more than kiss? What-
“I think that you should definitely go for it with him tonight Saki.”
Saki froze. Am I really that obvious “I don’t know. What if I'm not ready? What if I just end up making a fool of myself because I thought I was okay at kissing but I’m actually bad? And what about you? We still don’t know how you should try to kiss him. We need to figure that out before I try, I think.” WHAT ARE YOU DOING GIRL?
Nagisa smiled, “You don’t have too-”
“But I do! You’re just as much in this weird relationship as me and YOU agreed that you wouldn’t try to hold back just for my sake.” SHUT YOUR STUPID MOUTH SAKI! JUST STOP! “And I think that me getting my first kiss with him before we even know how you should kiss him just doesn’t seem fair.” Why do you say these things? Why do I feel like that? She’s my rival right? I shouldn’t be on her side, should I?
Nagisa ran back over to the couch and threw her arms around Saki, “Thank you! It really means a lot hearing you say that. I know we’ve been through a bit together, but whenever you say things like that it really reminds me that I do belong.”
“Course you do.. I mean” Saki tapped her forehead to Nagisa’s, “we both love the same goofy guy and we’re in this together.”
Nagisa nodded and stood back up before dashing back to the kitchen, “Did you still want me to make curry tonight, or should I switch to something else? He mostly went to get the meat we needed for it, but I’m sure I could do something else you might like more if you’d like?”
Saki stood slowly, she’s amazing. I wish she was my girlfriend. Like wow. I mean I guess she sorta is. Like kinda. “I think Naoya was looking forward to the curry so let's just stick with that. He always loves the food you make for us, and I do too. You even make peppers and broccoli good and that's saying something.”
Nagisa laughed, “that’s because they are good. I’ll get things started. Also I'll put my phone on silent and see if I can figure out what I should be doing. So that we have somewhere to start from when we practice next time.”
“Sounds good!” SHE IS SHAMELESS, “I’ll hang up the clothes. And yeah you do that.” Saki hurried out of the room and up the stairs toward the washer.
What is up with me today? What is up with her today? Saki pulled an armful of laundry out of the washer and dropped it in the basket at her feet. The sound Nagisa made and how her face looked as they finished their last kiss replaying in her mind. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME? She tried to think about Naoya looking down at her and froze. Oh that’s good too. AM I THE PERV? Or do I just really like kissing? She thought of Naoya watching her and Nagisa kiss and let loose a shaky breath. Yeah I think I might be the perv. Then she thought about watching Nagisa and Naoya kiss, and felt almost the same. shit. Then she thought about kissing Naoya while Nagisa watched them and shuddered. Her hand strayed up to her lips as she thought about how his might feel. Thought about some of the videos she had watched while trying to figure this whole boyfriend thing out. “STOP THAT SAKI, HANG UP THE LAUNDRY!” She stomped off carrying the basket hastily hanging shirts and skirts on the rack outside on the balcony before stepping back in and hanging more delicate items in the bathroom. Glancing at everything she hung up she paused, she looks so cute even in just her uniform, or in her pajamas or just getting ready for a bath… STOP IT SAKI YOU LOOK GREAT TOO.
“WELCOME HOME!” she heard Nagisa’s voice ring up the stairs from down below.
Oh great, he’s home already. Just act normal, nothing happened. Just be cool Saki. She tried to steady herself as she ran to the stairs, “NAOYA!”
He was laughing as she almost fell down the stairs, “SAKI! Be more careful! You almost fell and then we might need to go to the hospital and you might-”
She almost jumped into him and wrapped her arms around him nuzzling his chest. “We both just missed you.”
Nagisa had taken off her apron and stepped out of the kitchen and Saki pulled her into the embrace as well, hand on her hip. “OH?!”
Naoya smiled and wrapped his arms around both, “You’re feeling awfully friendly today Saki! Is there anything I can do for you?”
“Nope!” This is nice. She held the embrace, her hand pulling Nagisa’s hip against hers, and her head on Naoya’s chest. Wait, does this mean I want to.. that I want a three- a three- that I want us all to.. together at once? “ Actually I think I am going to hop online and play something. You two fine to finish up dinner?” I need to get out of here! WHAT AM I DOING??
“I can handle dinner if you want to try and play with Saki, she already took care of the laundry even” Nagisa squeezed Saki and made very purposeful eye contact, then a not so subtle wink, as if saying ‘go for it’ to her.
“Well in that case, Saki, want to try and find a group to clear that dungeon you’ve been farming?”
“NO! No, I mean, I’m good. I think I’m just going to play a bit solo today. Maybe try to get that chicken dinner, you know.” GET OUT OF HERE!
“Oh okay. In that case maybe I’ll take a bath before dinner. We have a bit of time right? Curry usually takes a bit.” Naoya smiled down at the two of them arms still around them.
RUN YOU STUPID FOOL Saki pushed off of Naoya and let her arm drop from Nagisa’s hip, “Yeah I think I’m just gonna shoot some chumps. Maybe I can stream snipe Milika, she’s usually live around now.”
Nagisa looked almost disappointed at Saki before smiling at her, “Yeah dinner will be a bit yet.”
“Wonderful! After we eat we can go over some of the notes from class together too. There were a couple things that I thought we might need to touch on but aside from that we have the whole evening to ourselves!” Naoya smiled and started toward the stairs before pausing. “It really makes me glad to see you two getting along so well.” he turned before he could see both girls beginning to blush.
Saki froze and when Naoya was finally up the stairs turned back to Nagisa who also hadn’t moved. “Do you think he knows?”
“No, I don’t. But you also don’t normally pull me in like that when we hug, but that was nice. And it made him happy too.”
Wait I did that didn’t I? “Yeah it did.” Should I do that more? “Was that okay for you? Or was it too much?” Please be too much, I don’t know what I am doing anymore today.
“No, it was good. And like I said, Naoya really liked it too. So I think maybe when he gets home from errands we should all try to hug like that some more.”
OH GOD WHAT AM I DOING “Yeah, we should try to do that more … for Naoya.” Saki looked over at Nagisa who was blushing even darker red.
“Yeah for Naoya..”