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“Mosshead! Didn’t you hear what Luffy said? Fall back!”
Zoro twists his head and instantly meets the cook’s scowl. He seems to have taken charge of escorting the crew to safety, with a heavily battered Usopp draped on his shoulder. Amidst their anticipated victory, Luffy has given the order to leave and prepare for their departure. “Leave the rest to him!”
But that’s the thing, Zoro thinks.
It’s always him. They’ve only always been leaving the rest to Luffy. In the end, it was always Zoro who retrieves his captain’s body in the wake of the havoc— body scarred and frazzled in his hold.
“Sanji’s right, Zoro!” Still, in spite of the tight situation he’s in, Luffy manages to send a reassuring grin towards him. After landing a hard blow to their enemy, he shouts again, “I got this!”
Zoro trusts his captain, there’s no doubt in that. He begrudgingly steps back to withdraw when he peels his gaze off Luffy and diverts it onto the looming figure behind him. He watches with bated breath as their enemy get back to his feet and prepares to launch a final blast to an unsuspecting Luffy. Zoro’s face drops.
“Luffy!” His legs moved in autopilot as he surges forward, barely managing to draw Enma as he completely blocks the attack directed at his captain.
He feels an immediate sharp pang in his torso that sends him reeling downwards. From there on, he felt boneless— his body finally reaching its limit from the accumulated hits it endured from the fight, and he ultimately crashes onto the solid ground.
“Zoro!!!”
Zoro sees Luffy retaliate before running towards him. Damn it. He grits his teeth as he pants.“Don’t mind me, Luffy! Prioritize the important stuff!”
“I am!”
Zoro tries to focus his eyes on the blurring figure of his captain, but he feels too light-headed from the profuse amount of blood he’s losing.
The last thing he’s aware of is the ringing in his ears, probably more so screaming, and a familiar warmth settled on his bruising chest.
Then, he was out.
Zoro wakes in cold sweat, with no recollection of what happened after he passed out in Luffy’s arms.
He is sweaty and itchy, but the worst predicament of it all— he is unguarded. He doesn’t feel any of his swords when he reaches for them on his side.
He jostles, already shifting to a defensive stance, and hisses when a familiar ache spasms through his chest.
He couldn’t move a muscle, only to find out he’s bounded— thankfully not by constraints, but medical bandages.
Once it registers to him that he is in fact in Chopper’s room and is not being held captive in a foreign den of an enemy ship, he finally allows himself to relax.
He heaves and focuses on the familiar, metallic stench of chemicals and medicine— a poor attempt to distract himself from the numbing pain his body is enduring.
He contemplates removing his bandages to relieve himself a little, and against his better judgement, he reaches for the gauze’s edge that’s been neatly tucked in. While he peels them off, he squeezes his eye shut and winces as the pressure on his wound eased. The mark is still blotched-red, angry and ugly as it stares back at him in the dimly-lit room.
He could already visualize Chopper rushing to his side in the morning and scolding him for it.
After discarding the soiled bandages, he spots his swords near his bedstead and eases instantly. “There you are,” he says, voice gentle. As he secures them on his sash, he tenderly pads a finger across Enma’s scabbard and whispers an apology.
When he steps outside the sickbay, the first thing he notices is the deafening silence.
There was no distinct chattering, no tinkering in Usopp’s factory and Franky’s workspace, nor the sizzling of seasoned meat in twirly-brow's kitchen. Only the sound of the ocean waves is present— gentle and soothing as it cradles Sunny and lulls the crew to sleep.
It’s nice to have this serenity every once in a while. Zoro closes his eye and basks in it for a moment.
Everyone, unsurprisingly, has seemingly retired to their respective quarters. It’s already past-midnight, and the only ones who are awake right now are usually those who have slept through the entire day— which is Zoro, and the person who’s supposedly on watch duty at this hour.
And Zoro may have an idea about who it is.
He strolls and makes his way to the upper deck. He tries to get a better view on the figurehead, but when he finds no one there, his eye subconsciously dart towards the direction of the crow’s nest instead.
He squints.
Oh.
“Hey,” Zoro calls out when he finally reaches the floor. He automatically scans the room in search for him— just like he’s accustomed to, and finds his back facing Zoro— just like it always is.
Luffy is always facing the sun. He is the sun personified— warm, radiant, and so full of life. He lures people in without intending to, just as how Zoro fell victim to his magnetism.
But now, with his cheek propped on his palm, not humming a stupid made-up song nor munching on snacks he stole from the galley, Zoro realizes, something is wrong.
Luffy is the most brisk and spirited person he’s ever met, someone who’s restless and isn’t capable of sitting still for more than two minutes. And yet it’s the same Luffy in front of him… motionless and uncharacteristically quiet as he stares into the distance.
Zoro takes a few, tentative steps. “Hey,” he calls out again. “What got you thinking so hard?”
Luffy probably noticed his arrival moments ago— no, he should be. Observation haki grants him heightened senses, just as how Zoro felt his presence in the crow’s nest before he could see him.
But Luffy, with his head in the clouds, has only seemingly snapped out of his stupor when Zoro’s boots come to a halt in front of him.
He finally turns around and beams, “Zoro!” not in the usual deafening greeting, but in a little more soft and subdued manner.
Up close, Zoro mentally notes the new bruises his captain is now sporting, and his hands itch to inspect them further. Luffy waves his hand exaggeratedly like he’s trying to catch the other man’s attention, blissfully unaware that even in a crowded room, Zoro manages to look at him solely.
“You were gone for a moment,” Zoro says.
“Oh.. was I?”
Zoro smirks, shaking his head. “The future Pirate King shouldn’t let his guard down.”
Luffy’s eyes shrink into crescents, sheepish as he scratches his head. “It’s fine, though,” he remarks, punctuated with his signature shishishi laugh. Then, in a more hushed tone, he continues truthfully, “Because it’s Zoro.”
And it’s always been like that. It’s a known fact between them, a constant— Luffy, with his blinding trust for his first mate, and Zoro, with his undying loyalty to his captain.
Like two peas in the same pod.
“About the battle.” Zoro feels himself asking instead. “We won, didn’t we?”
When Luffy offers a victory-ridden smile, Zoro already knew the answer. “Of course!”
“As expected,” Zoro chuckles, breathless. “Though I’m a little disappointed I couldn’t see it all the way through.”
“Zoro was so cool back there. He was way better than me.”
Zoro shakes his head, amused about the flattering. After all, Luffy never takes credit for their victories. “Whatever you say.”
Luffy only hums in return while Zoro joins him on sighting the view, curious of what got his captain so engrossed about outside. They settle in comfortable silence for a few minutes, letting the gentle rocking of the ship soothe their fatigue. It’s only when Luffy starts to yawn that Zoro finally speaks again. “Oi, you should head back and sleep. I’m the next on watch.”
“Don’t wanna,” Luffy dismisses him with a hand. “Cause I’ve decided.”
Zoro raises his brow. “On what?”
“I’m gonna substitute Zoro’s watch duty for today! So it’s you who should go back and rest,” Luffy gestures to him as he puffs his chest out. “Not me!”
Zoro snorts. “I’ve been sleeping like a dead man for a day already.”
It hits the bullseye, for whatever reason, because Luffy flinched. It’s subtle, but Zoro notices still— ever so watchful about anything and everything concerning Luffy. “Is that so?” Luffy laughs it off a second later, head turning back to face the window again. “Then what’s the harm in doing two days? Leave your watch duty to me!”
Zoro shakes his head. “No way,” he says, clipped and with finality. “The last time you covered my watch duty, you surfed and asked me to swim and retrieve your crazy ass in exchange! And you didn’t drown just twice.”
“That was one time!” Luffy protests, his lips jutting into a pout in an attempt to convince Zoro. “And it was fun!” He giggles. The sound reverberates in their tiny little bubble, and Zoro waits the mirth dancing on his lips to reach his eyes.
It doesn’t.
“But really,” Luffy suddenly says. “I think you should rest more, Zoro.”
Zoro sighs. Instead of heeding his captain’s suggestion, he lays Sandai Kitetsu, Enma, and Wado Ichimonji on the vacant seat and plops beside him.
Luffy doesn’t move an inch. He doesn’t turn his head to acknowledge his presence neither, as if overlooking the vast nothingness outside is suddenly more interesting than striking a conversation with his swordsman.
Zoro counts the passing seconds until he hears a huff.
“Zoro is stubborn.”
The latter crosses his arms. “You’re one to talk,” he says dryly.
“Zoro is so strong and loyal,” Luffy proclaims, the previous comment falling into deaf ears. “And Zoro always has my back,” he exhales, long and somber. “And it’s weird.. cause that’s why it scares me.”
Zoro’s brows furrow. The sudden shift in the atmosphere caught him off-guard. He only manages to muster “Luffy–” out his clogged throat before Luffy stretches his arms around Zoro’s neck. He catapults himself until he’s halfway sprawled on top of Zoro’s lap and his legs are loosely wrapped around the latter’s torso. It’s not the usual bone-crushing hug that sends them flying across the room, but rather a more tender, shy one, as if Zoro is made of glass.
Personally, Zoro thinks he hates this more.
Zoro smells the sea on the mop of unkempt, raven hair as his captain tucks his head under his chin, nuzzling against his neck. His breathing is jagged, and his hold on Zoro is desperate. “I don’t know what having my back will do to you, too, Zoro.”
Zoro is definitely not a hugger. He shies away from physical intimacy, but he finds himself reciprocating the gesture as he pulls his captain flush to him with a hand on his back. He grunts from the pressure on his front, but the warmth of being in close proximity with Luffy already served enough comfort of its own. It’s as if Zoro’s engraving their embrace together with the battle scars littered on the expanse of his chest.
Luffy doesn’t break free, he only wriggles a little to give Zoro more space to breathe. Then, he slides his hands up on Zoro’s back, pausing when they reached the space between Zoro’s shoulder blades— the exact backside of the latter’s newly acquired wound.
Luffy begins to draw circles on that same spot repeatedly, stroking and massaging Zoro gently.
In a way, it appears like Luffy’s reminding himself that Zoro’s still here with him— alive and not bleeding to death with a gaping hole in his chest.
Zoro stills at the implication.
It feels like he’s been hit by a cold bucket of water when it finally dawns on him—
Why Luffy was being so gentle towards him in the first place.
Why Luffy has been at the edge of his seat, worrying over a chest wound.
Because yesterday, Luffy relived a nightmare from two years ago.
He was once again so close to losing someone important to him, in the same way he lost his brother at the paramount war.
And Zoro was once again reminded how they were not there— Luffy’s nakama, at the time he needed them the most, despite Luffy being there for them at all times they need him.
Zoro feels his chest throb, but he knows it’s not from the aching wound this time. He tries to swallow the lump on his throat as he awkwardly, but just as gently, rubs his captain’s back. He glides his hands across the slopes of Luffy’s shoulders and admires how something so small could carry the weight of the world.
Luffy has always been their nakama’s stronghold, their anchor, and their comfort. They depend on him like they depend on the sun to guide them in the high seas. They depend on him like they depend on the ocean waves to bring them to where they need be.
But right now, at this moment, Zoro wants Luffy to be on the receiving end of it. He wants to be the pillar instead, who will support Luffy’s burdens and keep him upright.
“It’s hard,” Luffy admits, voice on the verge of breaking, and it evokes an unpleasant feeling in the pit of Zoro’s stomach.
The crew never talked about it. It’s a sensitive subject they feel compelled to avoid, and yet Luffy’s here, bearing himself open about the said topic and allowing himself to be vulnerable in front of Zoro. “I don’t want to lose anyone anymore.” Luffy’s lip quivers. His grip on him is unrelenting, and Zoro just wants to ingrain into Luffy’s thick skull that he isn’t going anywhere, not anymore. He isn’t going to disappear the moment Luffy’s hold on him slackens.
It was his sworn promise to stay by Luffy’s side until the end anyway.
“I’m okay,” Zoro softly affirms after a while. Even though he’s been programmed to use his limbs for cutting, tearing, and wreaking havoc, Zoro surprised himself when he snakes them around Luffy’s waist instead to further cater comfort. “I know what I’m doing.”
Luffy only shuffles closer. “Ace knew what he was doing, too.”
He’s shaking like a leaf. As if the lid of the closely confined frustration and suffering he amassed from the past two years got unsealed and only Zoro’s here to withstand it.
Zoro doesn’t say a word. He doesn’t even feel himself breathe. He just lets his captain bask in his warmth and take all the time he needs to ease his worries.
When the caresses on his back gradually weaken, Zoro wordlessly brings his hand to the base of Luffy’s head and begins carding his hair. “Sorry. It didn’t cross my mind how it must have felt for you,” Zoro admits, at the same time he feels Luffy freeze. “But, I can’t promise not do it again.”
Luffy’s lips stretch to a thin line. “Sorry,” he says a moment later. “You thought I had to be saved, and I almost got your dream compromised.”
Zoro’s eye widen. “That’s not—”
“Didn’t Zoro want to become the world’s strongest swordsman?” Luffy murmurs, thoughtful and open. “I never want to stand in the way of your dream.”
“And you aren’t, idiot.” Sighing, Zoro finally detaches himself a little to take a look at his captain. Luffy stares back with a raised brow, but his eyes keep slipping aimlessly that it prompts Zoro to hold his chin and level his gaze. “Let’s just say, my ambition has slightly changed in a way.”
“It did?”
“Yeah.” Zoro licks his lips, unsure of how to properly address the said matter. “My goal now is to become the world’s strongest swordsman beside my captain, who’s gonna be King of the Pirates.”
Luffy’s mouth gapes. It’s a rare occurrence to render him speechless, and Zoro uses this opportunity to prove a point. “And to achieve that, I can’t have the Pirate King himself dying on me, can I?”
For a moment, Luffy only gawks back at him in sheer astonishment. Zoro’s about to contemplate whether he said something wrong when the younger unabashedly bursts out laughing, clutching his stomach as if Zoro just cracked the joke of the century.
“What’s funny?” Zoro clicks his tongue, appearing quite offended with the reaction. But when Luffy throws his head back, he leans in instinctively to support his weight.
“Nothing! It’s just that you can be smart when you want to, Zoro.”
Zoro smacks him, hard and unapologetic. “I’m not the idiot here, dumbass.”
Luffy laughs again. This time, it doesn’t hurt Zoro’s ears when Luffy promises back in a whisper-yell manner, “Well, if that’s what Zoro wants! I’m gonna get stronger, and stronger, and stronger still!”
“That’s more like it.”
“And then Zoro wouldn’t have to get hurt in my stead, right?”
Zoro hums. “I don’t regret what I did, not one bit,” he confesses carefully with a flick on Luffy’s forehead. “Each scar and wound tell a story. They’re proof of how we live.” And whom we die for, his traitorous mouth almost says. It’s an admission that he’d rather cage in between his teeth, so instead, he rushes to say, “Don’t beat yourself over it.”
While Luffy may have been oblivious of it, Zoro is aware of the survivor’s guilt the younger must have carried through the course of two years, and has only been relieved of it after learning that there are people out there who’s actually really glad that he’s alive.
A permission, per se, to live again with no regrets.
And Zoro would never want him to go through all that again. He doesn’t want Luffy to feel responsible for what happened to him yesterday.
“I will always have your back,” Zoro promises, and Luffy knows. The latter only shudders in response, but Zoro isn’t finished. He practically shoves the words onto Luffy’s ear as he whispers, “And you don’t have to worry about me, cause I know you’ll also have mine.”
Luffy gasps, his eyes finally restoring their usual shine as they morph in child-like wonder. His expression reads I’m being depended on, and Zoro only finds himself agreeing.
“Isn’t that right, captain?”
Tears prickle Luffy’s eyes. For the first time that day, Luffy regains back his composure and confidence. With a loud and booming laugh, he replies, “Of course, you can count on me!”
Zoro finds himself gravitating to the sound and mirrors his laugh.
“And Zoro’s not allowed to die.” Luffy declares, like there’s no room for debate. And really, there isn’t, especially after he adds “Captain’s orders.”
For Zoro, it was the easiest he’s asked. With a boyish grin, he replies with no hesitation, “Aye, captain.”
Because Zoro may not fear death, but he will desperately claw his way out from the pits of hell as long as Luffy asks him to live.
It’s fitting for someone who aims to hold the title of the future World’s Strongest Swordsman, and it’s fitting for a first mate whose role is to stand beside the future Pirate King.
A small smile tugs on the corners of his lips, easy and content. “Now that it’s settled, captain should really go and rest. You’re tired, aren’t you?”
Luffy purses his lips. It’s a tendency he often does when he refuses to admit something. But when Zoro’s hand ghost over his face, emphasizing the lethargic state he’s in with the way his eyelids droop, they both knew that denying would be futile. “Were you seriously planning to cover for my watch duty when you can barely keep your eyes open?”
“Can’t help it,” Luffy sluggishly says. “Zoro hasn’t been waking up the entire day, and I needed to be there when he wakes up.”
“You waited?”
Luffy’s brows furrow. “Yeah. Why?”
Luffy didn’t sleep because he didn’t want to leave his side.
Luffy must’ve been the one who brought his swords next to him too.
Zoro inhales. “Well..” He would never admit it out loud, but deep inside, he’s thankful and glad. “Why would you?”
Luffy slightly frowns, still utterly confused about the stupid question. “Do I need a reason to? It’s because I wanna, and Zoro must know by now that I can do whatever I want.”
Zoro chuckles. It’s simple, and yet so so Luffy. “That, I know of.”
Luffy just yawns and doesn’t press further. “Whatever, Zoro wins. I’m gonna take a nap,” he says. “Don’t think you could start bossing me around though, just because I listened.”
“Yeah, wouldn’t think of it.” Zoro grumbles. “Really doubt there’s a single soul out there who has successfully bossed you around.”
Luffy just laughs and shifts to a more comfortable position on Zoro’s thighs. Though he’s cautious with the wound, he earns a curse under the latter’s breath when he unintentionally elbows his side. “Oh, sorry Zoro,” he says meekly, and Zoro answers with a scoff. Luffy plants his head on Zoro’s shoulder and stretches his legs on Zoro’s lap until they reached the lounge seat. “Can I sleep like this?”
“Up to you.” Zoro shakes his head with a sigh, though he’s not entirely opposed to the idea of having Luffy cling onto him. He lazily encircles his arm around Luffy’s waist again. “You wouldn’t have given up even if I say no, would you?”
“Yep!” Luffy answers in a heartbeat. Giggling, he finally shuts his eyes close and mumbles a sleepy “g’night Zoro.”
Zoro only sweeps a few hair strands away from his face with a hum. His other hand reaches out to trace the outlines of Luffy’s back, mimicking the previous gesture of the other.
And when dawn breaks and Zoro ends up asking Chopper to tend to his backache and sore thighs as well, then so be it.
With the faint gushes of the waves punctuated by Luffy’s snores, Zoro thinks, at least his heart is warm.