Chapter Text
Simon stood before an audience of humans, all intently listening to his lecture on the technology of the 20th century. He happily talked on and on about a time where everyone believed they were on the edge on innovation. Now, everything is technical, at least in the human city, and everyone has smart devices that cater to their every whim and worry. He sometimes still wishes he can return to pagers and fax machines, but it was as old as him and there was no going back. As Simon realized he was, once again, rambling on, He cleared his throat to gain their attention back.
“Um- well.. Does anyone have any questions?”
The crowd fell silent, as Simon stood there like a fool, he quickly wrapped up his presentation.
“Very well, If no one has any questions, that concludes this tour!” Simon gestured behind the group towards the Museum's exit. The crowd dispersed and he was left to stand in front of the technology exhibit that displayed a mannequin colorfully adorned with a Walkman.
With the last tour of the day finally gone, He left the 20th century museum with a contented smile on his face. He glanced down at his watch and estimated he had just enough time to make it down to Dirt Beer Guy’s tavern before happy hour. Simon made his way to a gondola waiting at the edge of town and it sailed him down to the Candy Kingdom. He tipped the gondolier and stepped off into the vibrant kingdom. He made his way through the town and arrived at the tavern where he heard a lot of commotion and cheers inside. He double-checked his watch and happy hour was still 20 minutes out.
He swung open the door and stepped inside, where everyone excitedly cheered Simon’s name. At the bar, Finn waved a beer pint in his direction.
“SIMON! You made it! Come on in buddy, drinks are on me!”
Simon chuckles and walks over, Taking the seat beside Finn where he already had his own mug waiting. “What's the occasion huh? Slay another big beast?” He asked before taking a drink from his mug.
“Better than that! Huntress Wizard and I are finally pregnant!” He announced.
Simon nearly choked on his drink while the rest of the bar erupted in cheers once more. With foam threatening to escape his nose, he managed to stifle a cough to avoid offending Finn.
“T-that's great Finn!” While the foam burned in his nose, Simon forced a smile.
“Isn’t it? I’m finally gonna get to be a dad!”
“Heh, well if you ever need help I can always lend a hand. I know a thing or two about being a dad..” He timidly offered.
“Not really” Dirt Beer Guy chimes in “you only raised Marceline for like.. 5 years."
“I was still a big positive part of her formative years.” Simon snaps back, Shocked at how frustrated he was. He could feel himself fuming at Dirt Beer Guy dismissing how much he truly cared about Marceline.
“You abandoned her” Dirt Beer Guy chuckles “I hardly call that positive.” Though Dirt Beer Guy had no Ill intent. This triggered Simon something fierce.
“Look. Marceline was the only daughter I had. And I lost her and everything to that crown.” Simon's anger had reached a boiling point. He fought desperately to contain his anger not wanting to overshadow Finn’s good news. But inside, He fell on the brink of madness.
In an attempt to ease the situation, Finn placed his hand on Simon’s shoulder. Snapping him out of anger for a moment. “Here Simon, Let's head outside for some fresh air.” Without another word, Simon followed Finn out of the tavern.
“You wanna tell me what all that was?”
“I don’t wanna talk about it, Finn..”
“Come on Simon. You don’t sound like yourself.”
Simon let out a long sigh and rubbed his eyes "I don't know.. I.. I guess I feel lonely.. You and Huntress wizard just remind me of what I lost, Marceline doesn't even visit or answer my calls anymore, And I can only talk to Fionna over the phone.. I feel so adrift.. Betty thinks my life has meaning.. but I don't seem to have one anymore.."
Finn listened to Simon vent and wrapped his arm around him "Heyy it's okay! We just gotta get you some friends!"
Simon's frustration spilled out, "You don't get it.. I've tried making friends in the human city.. They all just see me as some old guy who used to be cool.."
Finn's face lit up with an idea, "What if you lived down here? You did say you wanted to move away from that dehumanizing place!"
Simon hesitated, "I guess.. but housing in the candy kingdom is so expensive nowadays.."
"Move in with me and Huntress! We'd love to have ya!" Finn beams and pulls him closer into a big bear hug.
Simon attempted to push him away, but Finn persisted. "Finn- you know I can't do that.. you have a baby on the way now.."
"It's only for a little bit. And you did offer to help!"
"I don't know Finn.. I'd have to think about it.."
Finn eased his grasp on Simon, giving him a chance to finally breathe, "Alright well, you know where to find me. You wanna head back inside?"
Simon considered for a moment, but he just couldn't. "Um.. actually I think I'll head home.."
"Alright then" Finn gave a playful punch to Simon's shoulder. Prompting a yelp from him. "You let me know if you change your mind then."
"I-I will."
Simon watches Finn return to the tavern and sighs heavily. Loneliness began to creep up on him as he felt himself spiral downward into a deep depression. Once again, He was alone. He knew he should have a talk with Betty, it might bring him some much needed comfort.
~~
He stood before the Betty shrine still in his closet. After saying goodbye to her, He talked to the repaired Golb statue like it was Betty herself. It brought him comfort in the thought that she was listening whenever he talked to her. Seated before the statue, he let out a shaky sigh.
"Oh Betty.." Simon spoke with a tremor in his voice. Running his fingers through his hair, "I could really use some guidance.. I'm just.. so tired of being alone.. This house.. it's just so empty.." He lets out another shaky sigh, "I miss you so much Betty…"
He sat in silence for what felt like hours, a tear running down his cheek and splashing onto the altar in front of the statue. Memories flooded back, taking him to a time before the mushroom war. When Betty first brought up the idea of having Children. He vividly recalled his response, the moment he had told her they should wait a little while, as he was about to embark on his journey to Scandinavia..
Distraught and overwhelmed with regret, Simon's fists came crashing down upon the altar as a sob escaped his lips "I'm so sorry.. I wish I could make this right Princess.." He whispered through the tears, his voice filled with sorrow and longing. At that moment.. He uncovered trauma he never remembered burying. Another layer of pain that added to the already profound hurt in his heart brought on by Betty's sacrifices.
Suddenly, Simon's eyes shot open, and he found himself encircled by a red, glowing ring. His gaze darted around, landing on the altar, where he noticed the Golb statue's eyes were also glowing. Panic surged through him as he was swiftly pulled down into the swirling portal, plummeting into GOLBetty's domain and landing on a platform right in front of Her. His awe mirrored in her large gaze as they locked eyes.
"B-Betty..?"
GOLBetty remained quiet, as usual. Her gaze still fixed onto Simon. He could feel her energy, her emotions. They felt so warm and loving.. much like Betty was. He could feel her in there, Still madly in love with him.
Simon stands up to face her "Oh Betty.. I don't know how you ever put up with me.. you threw away everything for me.. I didn't even realize it.. I am so sorry.."
GOLBetty leaned closer to Simon on the platform. She looked him up and down and closed her eyes. Fully content with her choice.
"I don't know what to do my Princess.. my heart longs for someone.. I'm so alone.." Simon wiped the tears rolling down his cheeks as he watched GOLBetty's eyes open again.
She raised her hand and extended a pointed, electrified finger. She directed it towards Simon and slowly brought it closer to him, jabbing it abruptly into his stomach. The sudden jolt sent him tumbling backward, landing flat on his back, bewildered and struggling to breathe as the wind was knocked out of him. She gently scooped up Simon into her large hands and looked down upon him as he slowly regained his composure. Magic surged through Simon, giving him a light tingly feeling throughout his body.
As Simon stood up, GOLBetty took one last look at him before opening her mouth and blowing a large gust of wind, sending him back into his universe once again.
With a violent thrust, Simon was thrown back into his living room from his closet, colliding with the metal wall of his house with a shattering crash. He crumpled to the floor while his entire body ached. He laid there in the aftermath for what felt like hours while the pain gradually turned to soreness.
Finally, He mustered up the strength to take out his phone and send a message to Finn.
"I've changed my mind.."