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It's not like Ryan had no control over himself, alright? He wouldn't be able to stay hidden in a city filled with humans if he wasn't. No, Ryan had complete control over his instincts and cravings as a vampire and was able to keep himself in line, but it wasn’t like he was infallible. There were still temptations he had to handle, and some were harder to ignore than others.
Seeing someone at work bare their neck unsuspectingly when he hadn't eaten in two weeks was something he had to and would ignore, even if he had to cover his mouth to hide the tips of his fangs. Having someone playfully drape themselves over him, their blood a strong sound in Ryan's ears was something he had to and would ignore, even if he had to ask them to repeat what they said a few times. There was plenty of urges and desires in Ryan’s life that he could disregard.
Michael Jones was not one of them.
Michael was a temptation that Ryan hadn't figured out how to resist yet. It's not like he really wanted to; Michael was a great friend and even better boyfriend but a human-vampire relationship spelled disaster. At least to Ryan it did, but Michael insisted otherwise. Even after he found out about Ryan's secret (it was Ryan's fault for not hiding the blood packets from the hospital, honestly) Michael refused to break up with him. It was a little confusing to Ryan seeing as the norm for humans when finding out their partner is a bloodsucking creature is to run the fuck away, but he trusted Michael enough to not argue with him. Himself, well, he trusted a little less.
Most of the time Ryan could keep himself under check, but he couldn't deny all the times he wanted to just break around his partner. Like when Michael would lay on top of him in bed and Ryan couldn't focus on anything but the steady beat of his heart, or when he wakes up first and Michael would be lying there sound asleep and defenseless and Ryan has such an urge to just reach over and pin him down and-
Ryan bit down on his lip hard, focusing his eyes on his computer screen. No, he couldn't think about that right now. It had been three weeks since the last time he fed and he couldn't afford to have saliva and toxins pool in his mouth and his fangs grow while thinking about biting Michael. There was no way Ryan could allow himself to hurt him, not even in a fantastical sense.
Ryan glanced between the monitors at where his boyfriend was sitting, Michael chatting away aimlessly with Gavin. His head was tilted towards the Brit and Ryan could plainly see Michael's neck, muscles pulling taut where it was turned. He bit down harder on his lip as he spied the slightly darker skin where one of the largest veins ran. Ryan didn't think humans could see it, but going so long without eating (fucking hospitals and their waiting periods) it was prominent in his eyes. The fastest vein that he could pierce. The fastest he could use to feed from.
Ryan took a deep breath and tore his eyes away. He flexed his fingers over the keyboard but he couldn't focus on the GTA he was editing. He pushed himself away from his desk and ran a hand over his face, eyes slipping shut. Maybe he would call the hospital and see how much longer it would take to get his new month of packets again. Why couldn’t more humans donate blood? Didn’t they realize that by doing so they kept vampires from losing it and creating a massacre? Like, think of the children, go donate and protect yourself.
Ryan jumped as a hand clamped down on his shoulder. He opened his eyes to see Michael standing over him, eyebrow raised.
"You okay, Ryan?" Michael asked. "You look like you're gonna start yelling."
Ryan smiled despite his frayed mood. "Yeah, just editing is taking longer than I expected, that's all."
"Well, save and you can finish it tomorrow," Michael said, dropping his hand. "There's a steak calling for me at home and I’m hungry."
Ryan huffed a laugh he hoped didn't sound flat as he closed out of his program. Michael wasn’t the only one.
Ryan managed to shove the thoughts of feeding out of his mind during the drive home and all throughout dinner. A hushed call to a tired sounding nurse told Ryan it was three more days until he could come and grab his month of supplies, and as he returned to the living room he felt completely frustrated and exhausted.
Michael glanced up from his phone as Ryan sat down on the couch, grinning widely and moving to press up against him. He turned his head up at him, allowing a clear view of his throat. Ryan sighed inwardly. The skin was smooth and clear, perfect and just waiting for someone to just sink their teeth in and-
"See something you like?" Michael joked, snatching Ryan's attention.
"Uh, no," Ryan cleared his throat. "I can't look at you anymore without some kind of ulterior motive?"
"Looking is fine, but you were staring," Michael said, turning away from him to face the TV and hiding the tempting vein from casual sight.
"No I wasn't," Ryan insisted. "Are you sure you're not seeing what you want to see?"
Michael snorted but didn't respond. They fell into a lazy silence, the TV filling in as background noise. Michael was warm against Ryan's side, and typically it would be a nice presence but three weeks is a long time to go without eating and the heat just translated as fresh blood to Ryan.
It both nauseated and excited him. He needed some space.
"Okay, that's it," Ryan blurted out, quickly pushing Michael away from him. "You have to stay a respectable distance away from me until I get my next month of blood."
Michael shot him a confused look, but scooted away nonetheless. "Are you kidding me?"
"No," Ryan said. "I know it'll be annoying but it's safer for you-"
"I wasn't talking about that," Michael cut in. "Are you seriously going to cut off close contact with me instead of just caving and asking to take some of my blood to hold you off?"
Ryan stopped for a second, processing that. "What?"
"Seriously? I've been trying to get you to bite me for over four months now dude," Michael said. "Walking blood pack, right here, just for you."
"I... Michael, I could kill you," Ryan said loudly, voice rising in confusion. "I could rip your throat out easy as shit. I- I could literally drain your entire body of blood within minutes."
"Yeah, but I'm pretty sure you're not gonna do that," Michael said easily, relaxing into the couch. “I know you’ve been out of packs for a while now, so just bite me for like, a small meal or something.”
"I can't believe this," Ryan said, pinching the bridge of his nose. "You... want me to bite you? How does that even make sense? Isn't that the exact opposite of what your mind should be telling you?"
"Well, yeah I mean, it's a little scary but what's life without a few thrills?"
"Thrills? What part of I could kill you easily do you not get?"
Michael shrugged. "I just trust you I guess. Besides, the whole biting thing would be pretty hot."
Pretty hot. Michael was honestly asking Ryan to suck his blood because he thought it was hot. So he could get off while Ryan fed. Incredible.
"Are you actually saying you want me to put your life in risk because it turns you on?" Ryan asked, desperately trying to make sense of it all.
"And it'll clearly help you out," Michael tacked on. "It won't be a full meal because I need to live and shit, but it's a win win situation, Ryan. What, did you think I wore all those loose, low cut shirts for nothing?"
Ryan couldn't believe what he was hearing. He thought back over the past few months. Michael had been wearing more clothes that showed off his neck and collarbones, and he never missed an opportunity to get Ryan's face close to his skin, and Michael did have a tendency to sleep with his head turned and stretched out and goddamn it Michael had been tempting him. He had literally been asking for it.
"I'm not going to bite you," Ryan said firmly, even though his entire body yearned at just the idea of it.
"So you're just gonna shove me out the way," Michael said flatly.
"Until I get blood from the hospital, yes."
"I've read up on this, Ryan, and I'm completely willing even after reading five hundred fucking articles on it."
Ryan inhaled sharply. He had read up on it too, on vampires feeding off their partners. There were a few who had positive stories, but majority were from ones whose partners left them or worse, died. The thoughts did nothing to make this idea seem any more enticing.
"Michael, I can't," Ryan insisted. "What if I hurt you? Murder you?"
"You won't," Michael said softly, grabbing a hold of one of his hands. "I trust you on this."
"You shouldn't. Especially not three weeks dry."
"I shouldn't do a lot of things, but hey, it's my blood and I can choose what happens to it."
And that logic is so wrong, it's so wrong but before Ryan can protest Michael is leaning in closer and pressing the tips of Ryan's fingers to his pulse. It strong and stable, and Ryan can feel his fangs starting to come out at the promise of fresh blood underneath the skin.
"Please, Ryan?" Michael asked, smiling just slightly. "Just don't send me to the hospital and it'll be fine. I trust you, vampire or not."
Ryan stared back at Michael for a few moments, the strong pulse under his fingers causing his hands to flex. He really had to learn how to resist the temptation that was Michael.
"Fine," Ryan managed. "But don’t even think about trying to get me to have sex with you while I'm doing it. That's... too much."
Michael grinned widely at him. "Fine, whatever, c’mon let's do this."
"I've never seen someone so eager to get bitten," Ryan said.
"Well, it's not going to hurt all that much, right? It's meant to calm victims so they can’t fight back and shit."
Ryan huffed lightly. "Glad to see you paid attention in ninth grade biology. Yeah, it "calms" victims down but it's more complicated than that. It's to keep them from shouting or running away, being able to fight back and all that but it keeps you closer to being paralyzed than calm."
"Well, you'll just have to keep a close eye on me then," Michael said as if this was simplest thing in the world.
"I can't believe this..." Ryan mumbled. "If we're going to do this get over here then."
Michael scooted closer, pressing his body closer to Ryan's before eventually just straddling him. The eagerness would be endearing in any other situation.
"Just try and relax, okay?" Ryan said, feeling the tips of his fangs poke out from underneath his lips.
"Yeah, yeah, just fucking bite me already," Michael whined impatiently.
Ryan rolled his eyes but gripped Michael's arms securely. Every part of him screamed to just pin the man down and take what he wanted, but Ryan needed to do this at a reasonable pace. More for himself than for Michael, he suspected.
Hesitantly, Ryan pulled Michael closer to him, angling his head to brush his lips against his neck. Michael inhaled sharply, but if anything pulled himself closer to Ryan, head tilting to the side even more. His pulse was warm and fast under Ryan's lips, and his fangs scraped the delicate skin. He pressed a few kisses to where he was going to bite as a small warning.
"Jesus, Ryan could you hurry the fuck- ow holy shi-it."
Michael groaned loudly as Ryan's teeth pierced his skin, digging directly into one of the raised veins. He held onto Michael tightly, keeping the smaller man from slumping forward as a rush of endorphins flooded his body. Ryan inhaled heavily at the first taste of blood, the saliva and toxin mix doubling in his mouth. Ryan sucked and lapped eagerly, tongue effectively pulling blood into his mouth and spreading paralyzing venom over the wound. Michael moaned weakly but Ryan was far above from hearing him.
He was in absolute bliss. Three weeks of nothing only to be gifted something as pure as actual fresh blood. Blood from Michael, given to him specifically. Ryan moved his arms to form a tighter hold around him, pressing his fangs in deeper and drawing out more blood. It didn't taste very different from what he was given by the hospital, except it was warm and sweet and fresh. Leftovers were never as good as a real meal.
"Fuck, Ry..." Michael mumbled, head lolling as the toxins took complete control.
Ryan shuddered at the sound of Michael's voice, hoarse and wrecked. It was hotter than it had a right to be but still struck a chord of fear inside him. There was the telltale signs of tiredness and exhaustion in Michael's voice as well. Ryan took in a deep stilling breath, concern for his boyfriend outweighing his need to feed as he pulled his fangs out of his tortured skin.
Michael whined, weak hands clutching at Ryan's shirt. He ran a hand through Michael’s hair reassuringly as he slid his tongue over the puncture wounds, sealing them and pulling up the excess blood. He groaned softly at the taste, desire to make a new set of wounds growing in him again. Instead, Ryan pulled back to look Michael properly in the face.
His eyes were closed and mouth open, and a small smile came to Ryan’s lips. Michael's face was pale but after a few moments he opened his eyes about half-way, a tiny smile crossing his face.
"Can you talk yet?" Ryan asked.
Michael made a small noise and Ryan took that as a no, moving to gently lie his boyfriend down on his back, head propped up on the couch arm. He got up and quickly got Michael a glass of water, returning and pressing the cup to his mouth. With a bit of effort Ryan got Michael to drink at least a little bit, setting the glass on the coffee table.
"Well, you're not dead yet, that's a good sign," Ryan muttered to himself.
It was almost a minute before Michael cleared his throat and spoke up. "That... was really... fucking hot."
Ryan snickered at that, leaning down to press a small kiss to his mouth. "Sure it was, but I'm mainly concerned on how you feel."
"A shit ton of things. Aroused; tired; in mild pain," Michael said, shifting on the couch. "Pretty sure I could've come in my pants from that."
Ryan sighed and took the glass of water again, pressing it to his mouth. "Just drink this alright?"
Michael rolled his eyes but did as Ryan asked, eyes slipping shut when Ryan pulled the glass away. Immediately he was on high alert, but Michael only snickered when hands began to cup his face.
"You're not freaking out, right?" Michael asked, smiling up at him.
"Death is something I'm really trying to avoid, Michael," Ryan said, glaring halfheartedly at him.
"I think I'm fine. The grim reaper isn’t going to snatch my ass the moment I close my eyes. So, was it as good for you as it was for me?" Michael said cheekily, waggling his eyebrows.
"Maybe I should've let you die," Ryan said jokingly, relieved that Michael was becoming more awake and in control. "And... yes, it was. Probably more than you would understand."
Michael nodded, reaching up a hand to wipe at his face. "You know, you could send all this care your showing somewhere else..."
"No," Ryan said firmly. "No you don't, you're going to finish this glass of water and then go straight to bed. I'm not putting your body through an orgasm after that."
Michael whined, but relented when Ryan kissed him again. "Fine, asshole. If you wanna be boring about it, sure."
"Oh no, not safety precautions," Ryan mocked, pushing Michael into a sitting position so he could sit next to him.
Michael laughed at that, stretching his arms before relaxing against him. "Did it at least help you?"
Ryan cleared his throat. "I... yes. It did help, but don't think this is going to be a common thing."
"I don't think I could handle it," Michael said earnestly, reaching up a hand to touch where the bite was.
"Exactly. I'd prefer it if we never did this again, honestly," Ryan said.
"Oh no you don’t," Michael protested. "We both enjoyed this and I’m not going to let it stay a one-time thing. I won't even try to get you to have sex with me while it happens."
"You act like this is fun for you," Ryan said.
"It's hot as fuck, dude," Michael said, grinning up at him. "Plus, you like it too. No one loses here."
"I like it because it's literally what I need to survive," Ryan responded. "If I'm not careful I can kill you before either of us realizes it."
Michael hummed thoughtfully. "It wouldn't be a terrible way to go."
"Michael."
"I'm just saying! Seriously, Ryan, don't freak out over this. I'm fine, we both got something out of it, let's do it again... but in like, a week. Or two."
Ryan sighed. "Tell you what, let's wait until I get my blood from the hospital and am fully fed again and then maybe we could work something out. It would be a lot easier to control myself when I'm not as hungry."
"I take that as a yes," Michael said triumphantly.
"It's a maybe."
"Yeah, yeah, lie all you want. Now help me to bed.
Ryan rolled his eyes but helped pull his boyfriend to his feet. Michael was right on one thing; it probably would be a yes. He couldn't help it, Michael was something he couldn't resist.