Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

It was mid spring when Sunoo told them about it.

He gathered the six of them on the living room and slowly explained the way he had been feeling, and how he found out he was "a little". He didn't want them to feel disgusted nor forced to be part of it; he just needed them to know.

Having secrets within the group had never proved to be a good idea.

"A caretaker? I can be that, we can help you." Sunghoon offered and the rest agreed.

So they did. They supported Sunoo and he learned to embrace his headspace. They met little Sunoo and all of them loved him.

Jay loved him. Jay played with him. Jay got confused.

Because he knew what Sunoo was talking about. He knew about that feeling of dizziness before the switch, and he knew how comforting those minutes could be for a wounded soul.

He didn't know it had a name.

It isn't like he heard of headspaces and little space when growing up, let alone while training in South Korea. All the information he could find through the years was merely about sexual kinks.

So, afraid of that, he started supressing it.

The last time he had allowed himself to switch he was about seventeen years old. He was already a trainee and those small episodes helped him when the stress was too much. But other trainees depended on him, and when he was finally invited to participate in I-land, he forced himself to forget all about it.

And now he had to watch the members adore Sunoo's little headspace.

Something he could have never imagined before. And there was nothing he could do because, maybe his situation was not the same and he was just trying to force a 'diagnosis' on his feelings.

Maybe he wasn't even a little.

Seeing the way they dotted Sunoo made him wonder. It slowly made him crave. Craving made him envious and angry. Eventually he became a time bomb of emotions, grumpy, distant and snappy at whomever talked to him at the wrong time.

The slips started happening again, and due to his mental haze, it took him almost a month to realize it.

He would have these brief blank spaces on his brain where, after waking up from them, he would feel comforted. Except that now, immediately after realizing what they were, they made him panic.

"Stupid, that was too close, they are literally in the living room,"

He became a sad little who hid from the rest. A confused guy who couldn't figure out what to do.

The months passed and, although he managed to cover his struggle —to act as his usual self—, there was a point after November's comeback where he couldn't handle it anymore.

The promotion's week for Orange Blood was really stressing for all of them. So much that Sunoo unintentionally slipped every now and then. The members had to be with him at all times, and even carry some supplies that helped calm down the little with discretion. 

The last day before their almost free from schedules week, Sunoo slipped in the dressing room. Luckily, it was at the very end when they were already wearing their own clothes.

Unfortunately, Jay was the only one around at that moment.

"Sunoo?"

The little looked around, focusing on Jay with teary eyes, "sleep."

Jay pouted, going straight to their supplies backpack to grab a blanket. It was so soft that he almost wrapped it around himself.

But he managed to clear his mind and placed the fabric it over Sunoo's back and shoulders instead. Then he sent a message to their group chat.

Sending a peach emoji was all it took for the members to send 'on my way' messages to him.

"Hyung? I want home."

Sunoo looked so tired and miserable. And Jay —a caretaker by nature when out of his own headspace— couldn't resist comforting his friend.

"We will be home in a few minutes, yes? Your appa is on his way, and then he'll take us home."

"You tired too?" Sunoo made grabby hands, which the older could not ignore. He squeezeed himself next to Sunoo on the small couch and smiled nervously when the little made sure he was also wrapped on the blanket.

"I am."

The light blue color and soft material felt so good against his skin. The warmth of Sunoo's body against his felt even better. And the attentive eyes on his face made him feel smaller.

In a good way.

"You sleep too, okay?"

Jay nodded slowly. His brain quickly reacted to the environment and all it took was Sunoo patting his back for him to slip into his own headspace.

Chapter Text

When the rest of ENHYPEN came rushing into the room, Jay was already asleep. He had always been good at falling asleep.

Jungwon sighed when he noticed Sunoo was still awake, worried that he was basically left alone. "You can't trust a guy to keep watch for three minutes."

Sunghoon lost no time to get to Sunoo, crouching in front of him with a disguising smile. "Hey little one, are you ready to go home?"

Sunoo, always cheery, nodded and placed a finger over his own lips. "But baby Jay is asleep," he shared in a whisper, looking at Jay with a huge smile.

"Baby Jay," Ni-ki snickered by the door, soon joined by others in hushed giggles.

Sunghoon had to supress his own laughter, "is he? Then we'll have to wake him up, right? Let me take you to the van and your hyungs will help him."

"No, don't wake him. He's a tired baby."

Heeseung stepped in, "I'll take him to the van after you, okay? Go ahead, guys."

The rest of them gathered their bags and followed Sunghoon, while Heeseung shook Jay's frame slightly. "Jay, we have to go."

It took him a moment and a lot of effort, as usual, and when Jay finally woke up, Heeseung grabbed his arm. "Hee?"

"We need to go, everyone is already in the van. You fell asleep while Sunoo was in headspace, Jay."

The little was confused, but he complied. He got up and walked quietly beside Heeseung. Jay's head felt light, and his legs moved funnily, yet he knew that he shouldn't mention this aloud.

When they hopped on the van, Jake turned to him.

"Hyung, I know you let us know about Sunoo's switch, but why did you fall asleep? He could have walked out or someone-"

"Sorry, 't was an accident."

"We are lucky nobody got in, you know he's chatty."

"I'm sorry."

He didn't say more. They didn't insist any further. Soon one of their managers sat on the driver's seat and took them to their apartment.

It was good that he only shared a room with Jake, but right now he was afraid of Jake. His headspace told him the Australian guy was still mad at him for leaving little Sunoo alone. He felt guilty.

Even if he was feeling smaller than Sunoo was.

As soon as they closed the door behind them, Jungwon told them the shower order.

Jay was the last one.

"Sunoo, come on, let's eat something so you can shower and go to bed." Heeseung took the little's hand as most of them went to the kitchen.

Jay watched them walk away in different directions, and decided to go to his bed. They would scold him for sleeping anyway, so maybe that could help him go back completely to his normal headspace.

Almost two hours later, Jake woke him up.

"Hyung, we already showered and had dinner. It's your turn."

Jay was big this time.

"Thank you," he grabbed his stuff clumsily. Thankfully, Jake didn't comment on that, even if he was clearly looking at him all the time.

Seeing the common areas already empty sadden him. It made him feel like he missed out, like he hadn't been invited to be with them. But he was the one that decided to sleep. And he was the one that left Sunoo without supervision.

"Are you going to stay here?"

Jay looked up at Heeseung before nodding. "My parents are not in town, and I don't feel like going out this week."

"Really? Even Jungwon is going out, and he never does that."

Jay smiled at that, "he's going out only because he doesn't think Sunghoon can handle Sunoo on his own."

The 'parenting duo' —or 'main caretakers' of Sunoo—  didn't trust each other. It was rather annoying for the rest who, although also took part in the caretaking, had trusted them more with such responsibility.

Jay was mostly in charge of preparing meals, although he was really resourceful when Sunoo —or any of them—  felt sick.

The previous day they all stayed in to mostly sleep because they needed to recover energy. Jay cooked for everybody, trying to make up for his mistake.

"And you? Are you going out?"

Heeseung shook his head. "I saw my family last week, and I'm feeling lazy."

Jay made a sound of agreement and walked back to his room. He thought everyone would go out today and planned to research on methods to stop regressing.

He would just have to be careful.

Back in his room he grabbed his tablet and started an extensive research. But all he could find in English was telling him there was an underlying trauma from his past that needed to be solved.

The only way to stop or at least control his regression would be by seeing a therapist.

Jay couldn't hold back his tears at that. He didn't remember having a big trauma that could trigger his regressions. And he definetly didn't want to talk about this with anyone. Let alone a stranger.

He got desperate, and overwhelmed. And he just needed that comfort but felt like he didn't deserve it.

The members where already busy and enchanted with Sunoo. How could he take that away from him? And surely they wouldn't react the same way to him being a little.

Sunoo was cute, he was small, and he was simply perfect for this. Jay didn't even have a nice smile like Sunoo, he didn't even like aegyo.

He was awkward, he was tall, and he was their second oldest.

It would be too much for the rest, and he honestly felt ashamed because now he knew his little headspace was on the younger side. That only made everything worse.

"Mom," he whispered after crying in silence for around five minutes. He missed his parents, he missed being the center of attention and depending on someone.

"Jay?"

"Mom?" he whispered before realizing that voice was far from sounding like his mom's. It was Heeseung, calling for him.

"Jay?" The oldest knocked on the door before opening it very slightly. "Are you asleep?"

"Yes," Jay murmured, burying himself under his covers. He almost panicked before reasoning that Heeseung couldn't have heard him.

Heeseung chuckled. "Are you okay?" The oldest almost left, thinking that Jay might be needing privacy for alone time. But they had some rules around the apartment and if they needed to take care of things, they always locked the doors.

"Yes." Jay sat up just so Heeseung wouldn't think he was wanking. Not that it was something bad, but he definetly wasn't doing that.

Heeseung peaked through the opening when he heard the sheet's rustling. "Okay, I ordered enough food for both, do you want to have lunch with me?"

Most of the blanket covered Jay's frame and face as he didn't let go of it. "In a minute," he waited for Heeseung to leave.

Heeseung didn't. "Jay-ah, are you really okay?" He finally entered the bedroom and hunched over a bit to try and see his face. "You know we can talk."

Jay shook his head, well, more like moved his whole upper body as to say no. He didn't trust his voice. And he shouldn't have. As soon as he opened his mouth to try and breath in the limited oxygen of his fort, he gasped.

It was a breathing spam, like those children had after crying for hours.

"Jongseongi-" Heeseung frowned with concern, rushing to hug his friend.

That uncovered Jay's head and, although he was now able to breath, he was close to panic again. However, Heeseung couldn't see his face because he was hugging him.

Jay's diaphragm kept causing little gasps and his tears started falling again. On the farthest corner of the bed, Jay's tablet was still on.

Heeseung didn't mean to pry, he wasn't like that. Still, he wanted to know how to make his friend feel better, and for that, he needed to know what was wrong.

There was a tab open with big letters, and its title read 'How to Stop Age Regressions: Treatment.'

Heeseung's brain almost malfunctions. There were many posibilties as to why that was on Jay's device. The two main ones he could come up with were painful in different ways.

Either Jay wanted Sunoo to stop regressing, or he was trying to stop himself.

Heeseung would need more time to think more clearly, and he was tempted to ask Jay directly about it.

Then Jay's cries turned into soft gasps and Heeseung could swear he sounded wounded. So he guessed his second theory could be more certain.

Because Jay adored Sunoo, and Jay wouldn't try to harm any of them in any way.

But Jay was also selfless sometimes, and Heeseung could easily see the younger concealing his own headspace for the sake of someone else.

"Are you hungry?" he whispered instead.

Jay hummed a positive answer and soon the older was standing and walking towards the door. "I'll bring the food here, okay? Let me just heat it."

The brief time Jay was alone served him to compose himself a bit. He took a glance on the wall mirror and hated the way his eyes were puffed and sort of red.

Truth is, although he didn't trust anyone enough to share his secret, he trusted Heeseung more than anyone. He knew the older would never tell anyone about his crying fit.

Heeseung came back and they ate on the floor, mostly in silence. Unbeknownst to Jay, his friend was trying to find clues, to know if hew as really a little like Sunoo.

The room was pretty neat and only a few things were laying around—though most belonged to Jake. But there was simply nothing that could help Heeseung know. Unlike Sunoo's space, there was not even one plush toy on Jay's side, nor extra blankets, nor toys of any kind that could belong to Sunoo.

The little had stuff all over the house, but the only person who loved to venture into he foreigners room was Jungwon.

Heeseung considered checking under the bed or even in Jay's wardrobe. He almost did before Jay's pout caught his attention. "Are you tired?"

The American boy nodded, tilting his head cutely for a second. He was full, sleepy and really comfortable now that only his hyung was around. So much that he nearly slipped into his headspace.

He shook his head, smiling to cover up his nervousness and started gathering the plates. "Let me clean this since you brought the food."

"It's okay Jongseong, hyung can do it."

Yes he was his hyung. No, it wasn't common that he talked so caringly to him. Not like that.

"I don't mind it," Jay insisted, getting up and carrying everything towards the kitchen in a rush.

So he Heeseung stood up, looking for the tablet and finding that it wasn't on any longer. He then looked around the room, with blood rushing to his ears due to the adrenaline. "I'm sorry Jay," he whispered, opening some of his drawers and finding a small corn plush.

He remembered when a fan gave it to Jay, right at the beginning of their career as a group.

It had a tag, and written on it there were two words: 'Mason Cornwell.' Heeseung knew the first word was written by Jay because he knew how his friend wrote in English. But the second, it seemed so trembley, as if a toddler had written it.

Heeseung wanted to laugh at how cute the corn was, and at the same time he was overwhelmed by thinking that maybe Jay kept the plushy hidden to avoid regressing, or to comfort him when regressing.

Of course that wasn't enough evidence, but Heeseung was willing to find out. And he was willing to help Jay in whatever way he needed to be helped.

Chapter Text

The following morning, Sunoo regressed early on the day. Niki was the first one to notice, and opted to play movies for him in the living room.

Hours late, Jay —who woke up pretty late—, was taken aback when Sunoo hugged him and started calling him 'the baby' as soon as he stepped into the hall.

Jay had nearly panicked —again— thinking for a moment that maybe Sunoo, being a regressor himself, could tell he was a little. Still, he shrugged it of and greeted Sunoo with a kiss on the forehead, enjoying the hug.

"Let's play."

The older had no option, so he complied. Heeseung was the only member in the living room then, and he looked up from his phone as soon as his dongsaengs stepped in, "Sunoo! You went to get Jay?"

"Yes," the little smiled as cute as usual—even more if possible—, hugging Jay once more.

"How about we let Jay eat lunch first? He hasn't eaten for almost an entire day." Sunoo pouted and let go of Jay, running to be received by Heeseung's open arms. "Aigo, our little one is so obedient."

Jay nodded to Heeseung as a greeting. He was indeed hungry, and it wasn't until his stomach made a sound of complaint that he noticed he was staring. He was staring at how his hyung was being sweet to Sunoo.

"Did you guys already eat? I could prepare something."

"We did, and we left ingredients for you ready in case you're craving American style breakfast."

"American!" Sunoo copied, touching his tummy to conceive that he had enjoyed the food.

Jay chuckled and went to prepare his food.

From the kitchen, he could hear Heeseung talking with Sunoo. He couldn't tell what they were talking about, but the older's tone of voice was extremely comforting. Maybe a little too much.

"Jay?"

Jay snapped out of his haze. Jake was looking at him with his head tilted like a puppy. "Yes?"

"Are you okay?"

He nodded and continued cooking. Jay could obviously feel Jake's gaze on the back of his head, but he tried not to pay attention to it. He feared if he asked why, Jake would tell him something he didn't want to hear.

"Do you want some food?"

"Sure," Jake sat nearby, scrolling through his phone while he waited. Then they ate together in silence while watching Tiktoks on Jake's phone.

When some publicity came out, Jake got excited. "Oh! Let me show you what I found online, there are like hundreds of discounts and I got this sets made for babies, though of course they would be for Sunoo."

Jake opened an app, full of enthusiasm and showed the American his extensive wishlist. "That's a lot."

"Well, of course I wouldn't buy everything. I just want Sunoo to be happy, and he makes us happy so I want to treat him."

Jay stared at a green set which included a blanket, a pillow, lots of foam mats, a sippy cup, a rattle and a sippy cup. "That one is cute, but Sunoo isn't that small."

Jake pouted, "I know, but we can always keep it stored in case, or give it away. I really want to give him that blanket and pillow so..."

The older's heart rate raced, because he wanted that for himself. He was prety small sometimes when regressing, or so he thought. And also because it was green, and everyone knew green was his color.

"And that set of toys, can it be the one with a lot of green?"

Jake frowned, looking at a the huge collection of blocks and building toys. "Why green?"

Jay frowned back, forgetting for a second that this was for Sunoo. "Um, so it matches the foam mats... and the dinousaurs Niki brought him."

That seemed to convince Jake, so he changed the setting and they ended up buying a lot of things in green tones. Jay offered to pay most of it since he asked Jake to add more things.

"Jungwon is going to scold us for spending this much."

"I have paid more in food or less important things, he won't mind."

Jake stumped his feet on the floor, happy and excited for the products to arrive.

"Don't tell him, okay? Let's make it a surprise."

Jay nodded, "okay."

When they went back to the living room, everyone else was already there. They were sitting around the place while Sunoo played in the middle, on the fluffiest rug they owned.

"Jay," Heeseung called him to sit in front of him, pointing at the cushion placed on the floor. Jay looked around, knowing he could move the cushion to anywhere, but went to sit there nonetheless.

"The baby!" Sunoo cheered, crawling to be closer to Jay. The little grabbed Jay's hands on his and shook them affectionately. "You ate?"

Jay didn't say anything outloud. He could feel everyone's stare on him, so he just nodded.

"So cute!"

The rest of Enhypen had different types of reactions at how Sunoo was doting their second oldest. Some were amused, specially Sunghoon and Jake, and some were simply puzzled. Mostly Jungwon—who was a natural worrier—, because Sunoo had never played like that with any of them.

Then, there was Heeseung. He was encouraging the whole thing, and not in an innocent way as Niki was. Ni-ki was just fascinated that Sunoo had someone to play 'baby' with.

No. Heeseung was not only encouraging Sunoo, but also talking differently to Jay.

The American didn't know about Heeseung's suspicions —obviousy—, and still, the game was making him a bit upset.

Jay wanted to tell him to stop. To shut up. To stop calling him our baby and Jongi. He needed him to stop petting his hair. He needed to stop feeling small.

Because he liked feeling small, and knew it could trigger a regression episode.

"Jongseongi, are you sleepy again?"

Jay shook his head, "no-"

"He needs a nap!" Ni-ki joined, giving a blanket to Sunoo. "Sunny, could you put the baby to sleep?"

"Sunny can, yes!" Sunoo took it and wrapped it around Jay. The older really wanted to get up and hide in his room, to avoid having everyone's eyes on him.

He didn't. He would hate himself for dissapointing Sunoo.

So he let the other pet his hair for a while. Never had they seen Sunoo so in peace, so collected. He wasn't going to ruin such a quiet afternoon.

Jay ended up being asked to lay down on the couch, with his torso on Sunghoon's lap, his legs over Jungwon's, and his head resting on Heeseung's thighs.

Everything according to Sunoo's instructions.

Jay could hear his heart beat against his ears. He felt somehow nervous. On the one hand, because he had never rested his head on Heeseung's lap, and he had to admit, it felt as nice as a firm pillow.

And, on the other hand, he feared the others could get upset, annoyed or even angry at him for having to carry his heavy body.

At the beginning it was alright. Sunoo sang lullabies for Jay while playing with Niki and eating snacks Jake offered.

Then Jay fell asleep. Of course he did. He wouldn't be Jay if he didn't manage to fall asleep with such a comfortable 'pillow' and sweet lullabies for background noise. No one could blame him for that, right?

Around fifteen minutes later he felt a sharp pain on his hip, followed by a murmured order. "Stop moving, dude."

It was Sunghoon, and Jay realised it had been him pinching his skin what woke him up.

Ashamed, he tried to get off their laps. He was still feeling sensible thanks to Sunoo's loving treatmet —and Heeseung's sweet nothings—, and tried to stand up fast to avoid hurting their legs. To avoid being scolded again.

He ended up falling due to the abrupt movements.

"The baby!" Sunoo cried after Jay's body fell on the ground.

And that's all it took for Jay to break down.

Tears rushed to his eyes and it took everything in him to stop them from falling. He hissed at the hot pain on his elbow and hip as they took in most of the fall.

Standing up was equally—or more— painful than the fall itself. It was only the adrenaline of getting out of there that helped him pretend it hadn't hurt.

"I'm fine, Sunny. I'm fine."

Sunoo frowned with extreme concern and still decided he wanted to see if Jay hadn't hurt himself. Of course he had, but he was good at pretending and, after Sunoo 'checked' his body was free of injuries, he was let free.

Despite getting Sunoo's blessing about his health, the little wasn't over with it. "You pushed the baby!" He turned to Sunghoon and crossed his arms.

"What?! No! He was the one that-"

Jay interrupted Sunghoon, placing a hand on the little's shoulder. "Sunoo, I'm fine, it was my fault, okay? Just a silly accident." And, to prove once again that everything was fine, he raised his arms and moved his legs in random patterns.

Sunoo giggled at how goofy Jay was acting, and nodded. "Okay. Let's play ball?"

He was about to accept, knowing the rest of them —although pretending to be focused on their phones— were paying close attention to his answer.

Heeseung spoke before he could "Sunoo? Jay needs to rest, okay? Babies need a lot of sleep so they can grow and play ball."

Sunoo pouted, deep in thought. "Can I say goodnight to him?"

Jay almost melted at how sweet their little could be. He wouldn't mind having Sunoo's little say goodnight to him for every nap. Even if it was barely four p.m.

"Sure, come with us."

Heeseung then guided them to his own room, claiming it would be more comfortable as it was further from the noisy living room.

Sunoo held Jay's hand until he was tucked in bed, and then kissed his forehead. "Night baby."

Jay smiled before whispering back. "Night."

And contrary to what he believed would happen, only Sunoo left.

Heeseung stayed there until they could hear the little chatting with Jungwon and Ni-ki. Then, he turned to Jay with a frown. "Are you okay?"

The lump on Jay's throath was hard to swallow. "Yes."

"I know it hurt, it must have hurt. Would you like to take something for the pain? I also have a numbing ointment for injuries."

"Hyung, it's fine."

Despite his words, Heeseung took a small tube from a drawer and left it on the night table. Close to Jay. "If you need it you can use it, I have a new one anyway. And here's your phone, you don't have to go to sleep just because Sunoo thinks you will. My laptop is over there too and you could use it if you get bored."

"Why are you-"

"I have to go back to them, I promised Jake we would try to write something together. If you get bored you can also come back, after you feel better."

Jay decided not to try and ask his motive. He was still overwhelmed and embarassed about the past hour. He was so confused, and triggered, and had so many emotions that only a nap —or regressing— could help.

"Okay. I'll sleep for a while, please wake me up in an hour? I don't want to waste my whole day in bed."

He made himself comfortable, turning sideways to lay on the uninjured arm and leg.

After closing his eyes he could hear Heeseung grabbing some stuff from the desk, and paid it no mind.

He quickly zoomed into sleep, but before actually passing out, he heard Heeseung's soft murmur.

"Rest well, Jongseongi."

Chapter Text

When Jay woke up later that evening, everything was back to normal. He didn't have the urge to switch, and Sunoo was big.

Nobody made comments on the earlier events. Not even Heeseung.

The following days Jay took advantage of their free time and lived his schedule free life as usual. Then Jake's parcel arrived.

When everyone came back from a recording schedule, they found big boxes had been delivered to their apartment. At first they just frowned and Jay didn't think anything of it.

Then Jake screamed with excitement. "It's mine! Jay it's ours," he giggle euphorically, pushing the boxes inside where everyone else was already wearing house slippers.

Jay froze by the entrance.

"What is it? What did you order to get these many boxes?" Jungwon crossed his arms and waited for them to get in. Jake only put his finger in front of his mouth to ask Jungwon not to say anything.

"It's for Sunoo."

Jay tried to walk to his room but Jake stopped him. "Where are you going? Should we give it to him now?"

The older felt nervous under his friends' stares. "I think he will appreciate it more if he's in headspace."

Jungwon hummed, "I agree, but if I were him I think I would like to see it while being big too."

"Why" Jay asked probably too fast.

"Because you did this for him, not only for him when he is little. Am I right?"

Jake nodded with a smile, "we wanted him to know that we really love him."

Jay looked down, ashamed because most of the things he payed for, he wanted them for himself. Not for Sunoo.

Jungwon smiled at them, trying to pretend he was still upset at them and obviously failing. "Okay. I'll gather them for you, so go and change clothes first."

Not even twenty minutes later, they were opening the presents straight out of the mailing boxes. Jay had to stop himself several times as the tempation to reach out first was really big. Every time Sunoo grabbed something, his hands itched to take them away from him. He would never do it. He would never try to hurt Sunoo.

He can't even think of hurting Sunoo. Not after the younger hugged them with teary eyes and a huge smile.

Everyone moved to the kitchen so they could eat. Sunoo asked them to hurry because he wanted to regress to try his new clothes on and play with the gifts. And even if Jay should be part of that, he ate fast and lied about having to call his mom.

The guilt came to him immediately. Sunoo's pout of confussion was too much to bear so he hurried to his room. He was jealous of the situation. He was jealous of Sunoo.

But it was too late now to say the truth. It was way too late to admit that he was a little, too. So he cried. He was upset, and he couldn't hold back his tears anymore. He felt so lonely, and so confused, and so angry at himself — aware that he was hurting himself.

Jay cleared his tears with frustration, almost laughing at how absurd it was all. He felt like he was throwing a tantrum and feared that he could switch in that sappy negative mindset. And to make things worse, his stomach started hurting. Jay rarely got sick, so he supposed it was because of his anger fit.

Defeated, and with tears still wetting his vision, Jay sat at his desk. He made himself smaller by pulling his legs up and against his chest, and wrapping them with his arms. His cellphone was in front of him but the screen was off, and he didn't plan on using it for anything.

An hour later Jake came in to get ready for bed. The Australian walked to Jay with worry as soon as he saw him, but Jay was fast and pretended he was using his phone. "Jay? Is everything alright?"

"Hmm? Yes, why?"

Jake wasn't convinced. They had been living and working together long enough not to be fooled. "We can talk. Or, if you need someone to just listen, I'm here."

"Everything is fine, Jake," Jay stood up, immediately regreting the way he snapped at his friend. "It's just that my stomach hurts—it must have been the food."

Jake's mouth went from a frown to a soft smile, "okay. Jungwon restocked the pills and syrups in case you need to take something."

Jay thanked him, and as they got ready for bed, Jake hugged him again with the excitement of a puppy. "He loved them so much, aren't we the best hyungs? We are totally his favorites now."

"We better be," Jay played along, wanting this to end fast so he could stop thinking about the whole regression topic. At least for now.

A few hours after falling asleep, Jay had a nightmare.

In it, he was stuck in his little headspace during the group's schedules. It was scary and felt way too real for Jay to notice it was just a bad dream. In his nighmare, they were on a dance practice and, no matter how hard he tried, his dexterity was way too reduced to dance properly.

In his nightmare, his members were angry. They were angry at him for messing up, for not being a good dancer, and for not acting as a good example for the younger members.

Jay woke up in the middle of everyone scolding him and, even forgetting about the dream, he rushed to the bathroom. His face was covered in tears, but the pain he had felt earlier on his stomach was too big to have been cause by a simple tantrum. It was even too painful to be caused by a nightmare.

He ran to the toilet, barely closing the door behind him before emptying his stomach for what he thought to be hours.

Despite the lights being off, he could tell his eyes were blurry with tears. And, although his stomach was mostly empty now, it hurt ten times worse than before vomiting.

As if the pain of pressure on his head wasn't bad enough, he almost fell once he got up, feeling dizzy and still nauseous. He stumbled to the sink and rinsed his mouth. Then, after sitting on top of the toilette's lid, he got up again to brush his teeth.

He was tired, scared and annoyed at everything, so going back to his room wasn't his favorite option. He would rather just lie on the floor until someone would make the pain go away. So he did, and instead of having someone come, he ended up passing out for a moment.

It wasn't more than a minute, but he woke up with the annoying ring on his ears, angry as he was reminded of the pain on his stomach. He just wanted to pass out again in there, but he got up without thinking and walked towards Heeseung's room.

"Hyung," he cried in such a quiet voice that it could be called a miracle that Heeseung heard it. The older woke up —mostly because of Jay's strained breathing— and looked around alarmed. "Hyung, I'm sick."

"What?" Heeseung sat up to turn the lamp on his bedside table. "Jay? What.. sick?"

Jay closed the door and stood there, painfully pressing his hands against each other. He knew it had been dangerous to go there in such state, but he couldn't care any less. "I... I hurt."

"What happened? Come here," the older stood up and pulled from Jay's hands to get him to sit on the bed. "Where?" He inspected Jay's hands and arms, thinking that he meant an injury.

"My belly," Jay started to tear up, not trying to stop his regression anymore. "Throw up and hurt."

"You got sick? Your belly hurts?" Jay could only nod, and Heeseung felt his heart break at the sight of his pained expression. Then he hated himself because it crossed his mind for a second that Jay looked cute while crying. "Ow Jongseongi, don't cry."

Jay let Heeseung clean his tears with tender movements of his fingers. It was extremely easy for his brain to regress at the gentle caress.

Heeseung tried not to be happy about seeing Jay as a little. However, he was glad that they had supplies for Sunoo in case he got sick. "Is it okay if I go to the kitchen? I'll bring you honey."

Jay nodded enthusiastically. He loved honey, and Heeseung knew it would help him feel better, too.

"Okay, stay here and I'll be back. Sit here, okay?"

Jay pouted, and although he struggled to remain in a sitting position, he was obedient because he didn't want to disappoint Heeseung. While his little mindset was obviously upset about feeling sick, he was also excited to have someone paying attention to him.

So he sat until Heeseung came back, carrying a mug with warm tea and a pill. "Jongi, did you throw up earlier?"

"Yes. Stomach is hurt, I brushed my teeth."

"Okay. Did you go to the bathroom, too?"

"No. Stomach hurt, I throw up."

Heeseung nodded, just trying to make sure the pill he brought would be enough for Jay's stomachache. He handed the mug to his friend. "Don't worry, it's warm, but won't burn you."

Jay sipped from the mug before drinking it slowly, wary not to spill anything. He had never interacted with someone while being a little, so he was trying to be careful.

"Wait, do you think you can drink this syrup for me? It's only a little bit, and it tastes like cherries."

The little stopped drinking his tea and frowned at the dosing cup filled with red syrup. He slowly opened his mouth and Heeseung, a bit stunned, hurried to feed him the medicine.

"Spoiled cherry." Jay wrinkled his nose in distaste after taking it all.

Heeseung laughed, cleaning with his thumb a drop of syrup from Jay's lip. "Okay, now you can finish your tea."

Jay was a really polite little, and it amazed Heeseung how composed he looked. Even after stumbling into his room in tears.

"Are you better now?" Heeseung sat beside Jay after placing the medicine and empty mug on the desk.

"Sorry I wake up."

"Don't be. It's okay, baby." The pet name slipped his tongue in the middle of comforting him, and Jay didn't miss it.

He looked up, nervously biting his lower lip.

"I'm sorry. I'm little.. like Sunoo."

Heeseung nodded. "I know."

The younger began crying again. He was full of so many different emotions that not even headspace could comfort him enough.

The notion of Heeseung knowing his secret was overwhelming. And it was freeing. It allowed him to let go a bit, to relax and to allow himself to trust.

"You are so cute, did you know?" Heeseung tried, placing a hand on Jay's back so he could feel the warmth of his embrace. "I love you no matter what, and no one is going to be angry at you. Okay?"

"I'm scared."

"Baby? Look at me. You can trust me, okay? Who knows you are a little?"

"You."

Heeseung sighed, containing himself from his emotions because being sappy wouldn't help Jay. "Only? You don't have caretaker?"

Jay covered his face with both hands, "no. I'm alone."

And Heeseung could no longer hold back his own tears. "Would you like one? Would you like to have a caretaker? I can be yours."

He hurried to make his offer because he feared that the first empty questions could make the little even more upset. He didn't need to reflect, he needed a solution. He needed help.

"What?"

"I can be your caretaker. Or, if you prefer any other of the members I'm sure any of them would love to help you. But, if I'm honest, I want to be your caretaker. If you are okay with that."

Jay shook his head and had Heeseung thinking he didn't want a caretaker for a second. "I want you."

"You do?" The older smiled, giggling with excitement.

He already took care of Sunoo, but he wasn't his main caretaker. Knowing that he would not only help Jay but also experience being his main caretaker was breathtaking.

The little rushed to hug him, instantly feeling comfortable around his hyung. This is all he had wished for, it was more than he would have allowed himself to have.

Big Jay would handle the rest later.

Chapter Text

Jay woke up. His mind was hazy as it could only come up with fragments of last night. He noticed he was in Heeseung's room and in his bed. 

"Heeseung." The older was fast asleep and didn't wake up when Jay tried calling for his name a couple of times.

Jay got up slowly, walking around the room as to inspect it. There were some empty plastic packets for fever patches on the floor, along with a small container filled with water, and a small towel beside it. 

The absence of Jay in bed finally woke up Heeseung. "Jay?" He whispered, realising that it was still early and there was no sound outside. 

Jay turned towards him but didn't answer. He stood awkwardly by the desk, "what happened yesterday?"

"You got fever while we were sleeping and I had to put wet towels and patches on you. It went away around dawn."

Jay nodded, keeping his eyes fixed on the floor. He heard the rustling of Heeseung getting up, and still didn't look at him.

"Jay?" The older stopped in front of him, trying not to get too close. "What happened last night when you came into my room, do you remember?" He asked but didn't let the other answer. "Before you can overthink, I want to tell you that it's okay. You can trust me."

"I-" the regressor's voice broke. He was still confused, remembering clearly how Heeseung proposed to help him. 

When Jay looked up, Heeseung raised his hands in between them, facing upwards. "Can I still be your caretaker?"

Jay nodded, containing his tears because he feared Heeseung would think they were sad tears. "Yes, please." He finally placed his hands on Heeseung's, letting himself be pulled into a hug.

Heeseung sighed in relief, enjoying the moment although he knew there would be hardships later on. 

"Oh, I have something for you."

Jay pouted when the other left his side, but he was back in a second after grabbing something from the wardrobe. "What is that?"

"A knit weighted blanket. I got it a few weeks ago but didn't know when to give it to you."

The material was extremely soft and the color was a perfect match with Jay's room. "It's heavy."

Both laughed sligthly as Jay wrapped it around his body. "It helps regressors so I though you would like it-"

"You knew?"

"What?"

"That I regress."

Heeseung walked back to sit on the bed, hoping Jay would follow. He soon did.

"I wasn't sure. I suspected it and... I saw something related to it on your tablet the other day. I was concerned about you... I didn't want to think you were hiding it from us because you didn't trust us." He knew it was ironic, talking about trust after looking at Jay's stuff. Still, he didn't want to lie.

"I didn't know it was a thing. Not until Sunoo told us about himself. That was the first time I could understand anything about my regressions."

"So you had it since before?"

"Yes. I wasn't sure, and to be honest, didn't want to believe it. I tried to pretend I don't have a headspace, but lately it has been to hard to supress it."

Heeseung held his hand again. "You no longer have to. If you want to tell the others I can help you with it, and they will completely understand."

"Will they?" 

Jay stood up, shaking his head.

"They are our friends, your friends. We understood it with Sunoo so-"

"But it's different, hyung. Don't you see? He's the prettiest and cutest little you could imagine and he's their first encounter with a regressor. How could they accept me acting the same if not even our fans see me as someone cute and... like I don't even look my age. I look and act older, so how would you react to me suddenly babbling and having trouble to hold a fucking spoon?"

Heeseung tilted his head, "I would find it cute and feed you."

"Hee-" Jay sighed, obviously caugh off guard. "You can't just say something like that and-"

"Why not? You're my dongsaeng and even if you act older- even if you were older, I would help you. Just like Niki and Jungwon do it with Sunoo. Dude, our leader is the second youngest, I don't think ages have an important role in our household."

Jay had never thought of that. All he had reasoned was related to how he needed to be a grown up for his friends. About how awkward it would be for them to take care of him in that way.

So he shrugged. Even if he really wanted to believe Heeseung's words, it would be really hard for him to accept them as a truth.

"Do you want to try? You don't have to tell them... it could be only you and I. My offer still stands, with no conditions nor limitations."

Jay was anxious, playing with his hands and looking around. But then he nodded, sighing with some relief. Now he knew he could trust Heeseung both in and out of headspace.

"Do you like them?"

"I love them!" Sunoo giggled, building up a castle with the blocks Jay and Jake gifted him. 

It was the following night after schedules. Jay found little Sunoo playing in the living room right as he came out of the shower. No one else was around.

"Play with me."

Jay hesitated for a moment, but then again, there was no one else around. And, who was he to refuse such an offer?

"Can I build?"

"Sure!" Sunoo handed him the bag with blocks, making place for the older to kneel down on the carpet with him. 

Jay's smile grew as he started adding blocks to the castle. It was so easy for him to get used to the feeling, to forget that he wasn't in his room alone.

Some minutes passed when the first person came to join them in the living room. It was Jungwon, who went straight to the couch as he continued drying his hair with a towel. "Hey, what are you building?"

"Castle!" Sunoo beamed, pointing to Jay, "the baby builds too."

Jungwon laughed, "does he? Maybe he's not a baby then."

"He is!" Sunoo frowned. None of them noticed how Jay tensed.

"I'm not saying he's... I'm just saying that maybe he is... older."

"Oh," Sunoo pouted, "but I like him as baby."

Jay grinned, still between headspace and out of it. Heeseung asked him how old was he in headspace and he honestly couldn't answer. He didn't know for sure. 

And if he was honest with himself, he wouldn't mind being really young now that he had Heeseung.

"Okay, okay." Jungwon smiled, looking at his soulmate. "Baby Jay, how old are you?"

This time Jay panicked. He was doing his best effort to remain big, but having Jungwon —their leader and his best friend— directly call him baby and ask for his age was... too much.

So he just shrugged.

Sunoo seemed to notice how he kept staking the same two blocks together. "Baby? You're four? In fingers," he demonstrated, showing a hand and trying to count. "Or two?"

"No." Jay frowned, looking around to try and focus on different things. He was trying to find an anchor to his big headspace. "That's technically a toddler, Sunoo. Beside, babies don't talk. Babies are annoying, and can't understand anything."

The little didn't like that answer. He pouted again, "no, they are cute."

"They aren't. Babies can't even eat alone and toddlers are just little people trying to die all the time. They are stupid."

"No! They aren't!" Sunoo threw his blanket away and stood up. "You are stupid!"

As soon as the conversation turned into a discussion, Jungwon was standing by Sunoo's side, holding his arm. "Sunoo! Don't say bad words, don't... don't listen to Jay. He doesn't know what he's saying."

The disgust in Jungwon's eyes was too much for Jay. But he deserved it. That was definetly not his best idea for staying big.

"I-" Sunoo couldn't stop his tears, and he was soon crying as if in pain. "But he's a baby!"

"He isn't, Sunoo. He's just playing, he was pretending to be one. He was just acting and playing with you."

"No but I saw him!"

"Sunoo, that's enough. Okay? I don't want to hear anything else about Jay. Come on, let's go with Sunghoon."

The little followed although he kept shaking his head. He was really confused, and Jay was very scared. He made Sunoo upset enough to say a bad word in headspace, and also the little seemed to know for sure about his regressions.

"Shit."

"Jay? What happened?"

The American got up from the floor as Jake and Niki came into the living room. "Nothing."

"Why was Sunoo crying? They got us out of the room."

"I don't know, I'm not his guardian."

Jake was obviosuly not amused with such answer. "He was saying your name, did you fight him? Dude, he's like a child right now-"

"I know!" Jay snapped at Jake. "I know he is, this wasn't my fault, okay?"

"Hyung," Niki was about to ask if he was okay, but then Sunghoon appeared behind them.

"Are you happy now? He's calling himself names because you told him toddlers are annoying."

Jay shook is head. He hadn't meant to say Sunoo. He was referring to himself back then. "I didn't say regressors. And he's technically not a toddler, he's more like a small ki-"

"Whatever he is! The fuck is wrong with you?"

Niki looked around in panic, knowing a fight betweent the 02z could become a serious problem. "Maybe Sunoo heard it wrong."

Sunghoon turned to Niki with the same anger he was directing to Jay, "now you're blaming this on him? Jungwon was also there. Are you going to call him a liar too?"

"That's not what he said," Jay tried to defend the maknae since he was siding with him. 

"Why were you even pretending to be a little?" Sunghoon answered instead, "if you are going to fucking mock him at least keep the act together, don't snap at him out of nowhere."

"Dude, that's fucked up." Jake scoffed, looking at him with the same disgust Jungwon had a couple of minutes ago.

Jay started to regret everything with that comment. "I wasn't mocking him. I wasn't-"

"Don't you dare ever talk to him like that again. No, I don't even want you close to him. He had never misbehaved before this."

The oldest looked around, zooming out a bit when he noticed Heeseung was staring at them from the aisle. His big doe eyes were full of concern and anger, but at the same, they were comforting for Jay.

He wanted nothing but run to him and cry. It took him another moment later to snap back to the situation.

Sunghoon was discussing with Niki and Jake was now grumbling while putting the toys away. "And we thought you were kind, getting him gifts and stuff. For what..."

"I wasn't mocking him," he tried to tell them again, even they weren't listening. "I didn't mean to make him cry."

"Let's not make this bigger, hyungs." Niki's voice was louder this time and Jay honestly worried that their screams were further disturbing Sunoo.

"I didn't mean to make him cry, it's just that-"

"Well you did!" Sunghoon finally looked back at him.

Jay frowned, "you know what? Fuck you. You're not his dad-"

"You as-"

"-and you're not my caretaker!"

When Jay tried to leave the living room, Sunghoon and Jake held him back by his arms. "The fuck did you say?"

"Isn't that a bit too much cursing for a night?" Heeseung decided it was enough. "If even little Sunoo is using those words we are doing something wrong and it wasn't only because of Jay."

"Jay called him stupid-"

"Did he?" Heeseung interrupted Sunghoon. He might not be the leader, but he still was his elder. "As I understood, Jay called toddlers stupid, not Sunoo. And Sunoo called Jay stupid after insisting he was a baby. Jungwon already controlled the situation, so I think this is a lost of time. Come on Jay, let's go out."

Niki sighed, desperate. "Heeseung hyung, this is just a missunderstanding. Please don't fight guys, let's not stay angry."

Sunghoon raised his hand to point at Jay. "Don't you understand he was pretending to be a baby first? Who the fuck does that?!"

"I told you I wasn't." Jay stated, looking at them with a semblance that was too calm to be normal. "I wasn't."

Heeseung took his arms softly and pulled him out of there, both leaving the apartment.

Chapter Text

"Do you think I should tell them?"

Jay and Heeseung went to the building's rooftop after the latter took them out of the apartment. They even left their jackets behind because the tension was too high and words were too hurtful for anyone to have to deal with it.

Heeseung wasn't going to let him go through that.

"Not if you do it to avoid this type of problems." Heeseung had his arms crossed but let them fall when Jay shivered. "Are you cold?"

"A bit."

The older didn't have a warm shirt nor sweater to give him, so he wrapped his arms around Jay's frame. "I think you should tell them, but not now. Not until things get better first, and they apologize for attacking you like that."

Jay looked down. "Sunghoon was just defending Sunoo and-"

"But who was defending you? Uh?"

"They obviously didn't know I was slipping in and out of headspace."

Heeseung shook his head. "Not an excuse to dump all your frustrations onto someone. Sunghoon should learn to control himself and they have to understand that we can't protect Sunoo from every single thing."

"We should. I want to, and if I weren't a little myself I would be completely invested in making sure that no one could hurt him."

Heeseung held him closer and they remained in silence for some minutes.

"At least Ni-ki was behaving like an adult. I swear I was about to smack Sunghoon back there."

Jay laughed, leaning back into his friends embrace as their breaths got synchronized. "He was defending me, and so were you. You're right, I don't have to tell them to solve this... but I did call toddlers stupid. I said those things because I still hate that I'm a little."

The arms around him tightened even more, reminding Jay of his weighted blanket. He wished he could have it there right at the moment. 

"I love that you're a little. It's so unexpected, and so different from your current you that it makes me happy to see that side of Jay."

The American hit him slightly in the stomach with his elbow. "Weirdo."

Heeseung laughed along but didn't let go. It took Jay's tension away, it definetly got his mind out of the situation in the living room. If only it hadn't made him come up with new doubts.

The way Heeseung was making him feel now, out of headspace, was just as special as that.

They ended up going back at almost midnight after talking over an hour about all and nothing. The place was quiet and, since they were already wearing pajamas, Heeseung invited Jay to sleep in his room instead.

Jay told himself that he accepted only not to see Jake for now.

"Hyung? Jay hyung?"

Sunoo's whispers woke up the older boys. It couldn't be past six am as the sky was still pretty dark.

Jay sat up, worried. "What happened?"

"I'm sorry. Jungwon told me what happened yesterday, and how Sunghoon blamed you for it. I'm sorry for that."

"It's fine, Sunoo." Jay moved a bit, asking Heeseung to scoot over so Sunoo could sit on the bed, too.

"No, it isn't. I... I have something to confess."

As Sunoo made himself comfortable —as comfortable as three man could get in a queen sized mattress—, Heeseung got up to ensure the door was locked. He then went back to bed, making sure the two littles were covered enough with the blanket over their legs.

"What is it?" Jay finally asked, after giving Sunoo some time to think. He was obviously nervous.

"I don't know how to say this... and I don't even know if I'm correct."

"Hmm?" Jay held his hand, trying to comfort the younger.

"Some months ago, when we were still preparing for the comeback? I... I think I saw you in headspace."

Heeseung was witness of how Jay went through the five stages of grief and maybe emotions he didn't even know the name of. He also feared Jay might vomit or faint.

"Sunoo?" Heeseung's voice broke the silence after a while. "What did you see, exactly?"

The little smiled, "I knew you were involved in this," he added a murmured comment before answering. "It was only us at home, fifteen minutes or so before Jake arrived. I went to his room to ask for a charger and... Jay, you were laying sideways, just staring at a plush corn."

Heeseung bit his tongue to avoid chuckling. 

Jay, on the other hand, was still going through a whole process in his head. He was sure he had never been seen. And he was sure he didn't take Mason Cornwell out of the drawer since he gave it a name.

Apparently his little version did.

"That... doesn't mean I'm a little."

Sunoo agreed. "But then when I called your name you... stared at me and babbled something about cold. I was confused because your personality is not really close to that and... I guess I didn't know how to react. So I walked closer to your bed and you seemed actually cold despite the warm weather, and I helped you get in bed, under the covers."

"Maybe I was sick."

"I'm sure you called me hyung. And I'm sure you weren't really understanding my words at that moment. And I thought that maybe you were having some sort of... panic attack? Silent something... I don't know, something psychological or emotional going on. Look, I knew nothing but the fact that you were holding that corn like it was your dearest possession and then you were scratching your eyes so cutely that it slipped my mouth to say you looked like a baby."

"Doesn't mean I'm one."

"And I'm not a kid, and still I have toddler toys and you guys feed me, and play with me."

"It's different-"

"Jay," Heeseung interrupted, circling his arms around the American. "Of course it is different... doesn't mean Sunoo is wrong, right?"

Sunoo's eyes glistened at Heeseung's words. That was basically the confirmation to his suspicion. "Anyway... that's why I started calling you baby while I'm in my headspace. I'm sorry I couldn't keep it in."

Jay shook his head, trying to smile although failing to do so. "I... I understand."

"Jay," Heeseung shook him lightly, "it's okay. Remember we are okay wtih you being in headspace, as young as it can get."

Sunoo joined the hug for a second, telling him comforting words as well. 

Heeseung smiled at him, proud of the younger. "Jay, do you want me to get your corn? You can keep it here if you don't want them to see it."

Jay nodded, sighing as he knew there was not enough time left before schedules. He really wanted to regress, he needed to and the feeling of supressing it was becoming overwhelming.

"I'll get it," Sunoo offered, "Jake won't even notice me."

Heeseung nodded and Sunoo left for the plushie after they told him where it was. Contrary to Sunoo's words, Jake did notice he went in. 

"Sunoo? Where's Jay?"

"Um, morning hyung. He is in Heeseung hyung's room, I just came here to grab something real quick."

"Is he talking to you? Is he okay?"

Sunoo pouted, "he needs a moment alone, but he's fine."

Jake stood up and Sunoo noticed he wasn't even wearing pajamas but the clothes from the previous day. "He didn't come and I was worried because I didn't know if he came back with Heeseung."

"You should talk to him, just... not now."

"Okay," the Australian nodded. 

The moment he turned to grab clothes for a shower, Sunoo quickly opened Jay's drawer and ran out of the room with the corn.

"I got it!" Sunoo giggled, handing it to Jay, "Your corn has been rescued."

"Mason," Jay murmured, holding it close and leaning back against Heeseung's wam chest.

"Are you little?" Sunoo was definitely excited, relieved that he wasn't mistaked, and happy to have a fellow regressor in the group.

Heeseung could feel him nodding. Jay was quiet and calmed, but Heeseung knew it wasn't because he was sad. Jay said before that his little side was just like that.

"Yes, he is. Baby? Are you still tired?"

The little shook his head, cuddling the plush and trying to get comfortable with his head on Heeseung's shoulder.

"He's so cute," Sunoo clapped in silence, doing his best to hold back any sound that could startle him.

"Right? My baby is so pretty and precious," Heeseung smiled, rocking sideways to lull the little. "You're safe here with us."

The whispered words were more than enough for Jay to shake off the stress. 

Sunoo left first, leaving a kiss on Jay's forehead and heading out to avoid regressing as well. 

About ten minutes later, Jay let the plush aside and turned around in Heeseung's embrace. "Thank you," he whispered, hugging his hyung back and hiding his face on the crook of the taller's neck.

None of them wanted to let go of each other, but the sounds outside could only mean everyone else was getting ready for work.

"Jay, we have to get ready."

The younger hummed, not letting go. "I like it here."

"Hmm, me too," he giggled, forcing the other apart after squishing him. "Come on."

Sunoo approached Jay as soon as they were in the practice room. "What took you so long?"

"To do what?"

"To get ready," Sunoo smiled, "Hee told me you only regressed for a moment."

Jay shrugged. "I needed time."

"Sure. I think it's sweet, Heeseung and you. Heeseung being your... you know, your caretaker."

They looked around cautiously, making sure no one could actually hear them. The rest of them was already warming up, although the leader seemed to be staring at them through the mirror.

"I like it too," Jay admited with a tiny smile. "I'm sorry I didn't share this with you. I didn't know it had a name until you told us about yourself."

Sunoo sighed, "I wished I had known sooner, just so you wouldn't be alone with it."

"It's fine Sunny, I have you now."

The younger kept hovering close to him during the training, asking questions and making comments everytime they were far from the others.

"Hyung? Don't you want to tell Jungwon?"

"Because he is the leader?"

"Because he's your soulmate. Hyung, you used to be like two drops of water or... just perfect with each other. I miss seeing you being close."

Jay looked down. "I miss it, too, Sunoo. It's not only me though, I feel like he sensed there was a problem and... he just went away."

Sunoo shook his head. "Maybe he thinks you need space, which you don't. Right?"

Jungwon was still looking at them. It was impossible for him to do it discretly with such big eyes.

"He's staring at us." Jay whispered, frowning.

"He seems worried, Jay hyung. Just... don't avoid him if he tries to speak with you, okay? We need our parenting duo back, please."

Jay laughed, "I don't know if that's the best term to use when I act as a baby."

"Guys! Are you going to practice or what?" Ni-ki called their attention.

Sunoo scoffed, "this brat. Okay, just... if you need help with anything, please tell me. And have faith in these guys, they love you and they already accepted me. They will accept you, too."

And Jay wanted to believe that. 

He wasn't so sure due to the events of the previous night, as they still hadn't said anything about it.

However, he craved that protection. He wouldn't mind having Sunghoon defend him like that. He knew it had been a bit over the top, but unterstood it was because his protective instict kicked in stronger than his reason.

Jay felt a hand on his, bringing him back to the present.

Heeseung smiled at him and Jay was sure that he wasn't alone in this.

So when Jake approached him with shy movements, Jay didn't panic. "Hey, can we talk?"

Chapter Text

Jake guided him to an empty practice room. Well, mostly empty.

"Hi," Sunghoon looked up from his phone as soon as they stepped inside.

"You didn't say he would be here," Jay murmured, turning to Jake.

"I didn't want to you to say no... I'm sorry."

Jay shook his head, now looking at Sunghoon. "Aren't we friends? Why would I say no?"

"Because I acted like a dick? I'm really sorry, Jay. I shouldn't have talked to you like that."

"You were just protecting Sunoo."

"Of course but— Jay, that... The way I did it was too much."

Jake looked down with a slight smile, "after Heeseung took you away, Ni-ki scolded us. He was really really mad and.. it was embarassing."

"It was, because he was right," Sunghoon looked pretty anxious. "I regret it a lot, because.. I could see the hurt in your eyes and I just kept lashing on you. I'm really sorry, Jay."

When Jay noticed the glisten in Sunghoon eyes, he couldn't keep it together anymore.

"You really did, didn't you?" His own eyes filled with tears, and he hated it. "You," he smiled, not out of happines, but anxiety. "You could have been a bit more..."

"Smart?"

Jay chuckled at Jake's suggestion. "No— sensible? Or... patient. Well, maybe smart does work."

"I get it," Sunghoon nodded. "It was pretty stupid to make things bigger when Jungwon had already controlled it. Heeseung said so."

"Man we made him mad," Jake added as a side comment, "if looks could kill we wouldn't have survived practice today."

"And, I can sense Sunoo and Jungwon are also going to scold me. Just— I'm not apologizing because of them, though. I don't want you to think that either."

Jay's composure was calm, but his eyes wouldn't stop letting tears out like crazy. "Okay. I understand and I don't want to be angry at you-"

Jake reached to hug him when he couldn't form a complete sentence. "We're sorry, Jay."

The older of the three couldn't stop crying, both from sadness and the relief of not loosing his friends to a silly fight.

"What are you doing?" Jungwon came into the room, quickly examining Jay who was crying. "What did you do to him?"

"No, we didn't-"

"Are you yelling at him again?" Jungwon interrupted Sunghoon, pointing towards the door. "Go to your classes, now."

Jake grabbed Sunghoon's wrist, asking him not to say anything else, and pulling him out of the practice room.

"Hi," Jay greeted, turning to face the wall as he cleaned his tears with the back of his hand.

"Hyung, were they bullying you? You know that even if they are our members we can't let that happen and we have to-"

"No, they weren't. They were just apologizing."

Jungwon approached him carefully. "Apologizing? I'm sorry I interrupted you- you seemed really upset I though they were attacking you again."

"No, it's fine. I'm just a bit tired and... I couldn't help it."

Jungwon nodded, visibly more relaxed, before his eyes filled with anxiety. "About yesterday, I didn't say much to Sunghoon. It was in part my fault because I just said Sunoo was crying because of you."

"He was, Jungwon. And, I already spoke with Sunoo, we are fine. What I said was really hurtful and there was a reason behind it, but I understand that.. without you knowing the reason, there is no way that could be acceptable. What I said is horrible, specially when you don't know the context."

Jungwon frowned. "I'm lost."

"Okay um... I don't know how to explain it, you just have to trust me I didn't say it about Sunoo, and I didn't mean to hurt him."

The leader sighed, stuttering through his words. "I know something is going on, and I wanted to step back because I figured it was something personal, and.. it just made things worse."

"Wonie... This has nothing to do with you. It's not your fault at all, and.. okay, I admit I would have liked you to insist if you knew something was wrong because, something was indeed wrong and I was alone on it."

Jungwon nodded, swallowing the pain and feeling of failure for the sake of listening to Jay.

"I do want to tell you... It's just that it's still embarassing for me."

"Is this about Heeseung?"

"What?" Jay frowned, confused.

"What? No? Never mind... What is it about?" Jungwon smiled nervously, pretending he didn't say that. "You know... Nothing you could say would make me feel different towards you."

Jay sighed a laugh, "that's because you don't know what it is."

Jungwon crossed his arms in front of his chest. "Try me."

And it would be the perfect moment, the chance he was waiting for. Sunoo already knew it, awyways.

"I am..."

"Yes?"

"I'm... Heeseung-"

Jungwon's eyes opened big, and when Jay didn't continue, he smiled. "So it is that? I knew you liked him since forever! You don't-"

"Sorry, what?!"

"What? It's not that?"

"No!"

Jungwon covered his mouth with both hands. "But- oh, oh sorry. I'm sorry, nevermind what I said then."

Both of them were really red at that point.

"Now I don't know if I want to tell you, Wonie," Jay laughed, feeling more relaxed despite the confusion.

"I'm sorry. Also, you don't have to tell me in this moment, like.. if you do want to tell me, just take your time."

Jay nodded.

He needed Heeseung's support. He didn't want to do it alone, not even if he trusted Jungwon with his life.

"We do have a class right now so... I'll tell you later."

"Sure, sure. Um... Can I hug you?"

Jay smiled, pulling his soulmate towards his chest. He had really missed that. 

The following day, Jay went shopping with Ni-ki when Heeseung called him.

"Hey hyung, we are at Ikea, do you need me to get you anything?"

"I'm fine. Just... How are you feeling today?"

"I'm good."

"Well, Sunoo regressed a few minutes ago, everyone else is here so... I just thought I would let you know in case that could trigger you."

"Thank you, yes. I'll be careful when we get back."

"Okay. See you."

Ni-ki kept a distance, eyeing him and then going back to his side as soon as the older put his phone away.

"Heeseung?"

"Yes, he wanted to let us know that Sunoo regressed."

Ni-ki pouted at the news. "Ow, we were supposed to watch the new movie tonight."

Jay smiled in sympathy. "I could watch it with you, unless you prefer wating for Sunoo?"

"Would you really? It's supposed to be scary, like really really scary."

"Please," Jay huffed. "How scary can a film really be? And also, I'm not as coward as I used to be, okay?"

Niki laughed, "sure. I will never forget that, though. Ni-ki, let's shower together, I'm scared the ghost will come back when I'm putting shampoo on."

"Shut up, and my voice didn't sound like that."

"Yes it did, you were like a little baby back then. Ni-ki, can I sleep with you? I'm so scared." He continued mocking in a soft voice, and Jay couldn't get angry at him.

Back in I-land he really did act like that. But seeing how tall and strong present Ni-ki was, and just imagining that he would still try to comfort him if a ghost hunted the apartment, it was just too endearing.

"Whatever."

Ni-ki smiled, following him around as Jay pushed the car.

After a few minutes, they already had what they needed. And that's when they walked by a kids room set up. It was soft, unlike those typical overwhelming ones with stimulating colors.

This one was white and sage, full of wooden furniture, deep red toys, and so many plushies.

"This one's cute."

Ni-ki agreed before stepping in the set up. "If it didn't have toys it would be perfect for you, hyung."

"Right?"

Ni-ki sat at a tiny table that was simulating a park bench for picnics. "Hey, it's a good one if it doesn't crack under my weight."

"Ni-ki, let's go. They are going to scold us if we play in here."

He insisted a few times until Ni-ki actually listened to him. He was now feeling nervous, anxious at how at ease he was feeling around Ni-ki. Not because of his friend, but rather because they were in public.

The maknae noticed the change on his stance and finally obeyed.

On the way back Jay grew nervous as he remembered Sunoo would be probably playing with his beautiful toys in the living room.

"Hyung, are you okay?"

"Huh?"

"Back in the store.. did I do something to bother you? If so, I'm sorry. If it was the teasing or me not listening-"

"Ni-ki, it's fine, you did nothing wrong."

The youngest nodded, but the frown on his eyebrows remained all the way home. Right when the elevator doors closed, he placed a hand on Jay's shoulder.

"Hyung, I know I'm not the most experienced in life, just because you guys are older, but I notice things. And I've seen you act different lately."

Jay frowned, pretending to look confused. "No, Ni-ki. Everything is the same, don't worry."

The tallest wanted to say more, he wanted to insist, but they arrived to their floor.

As they opened the door they could hear the voices coming from the living room. Jay was already on edge since they saw that pretty room, and hearing Sunoo playing with the rest of the members make his heart ache.

He felt like he was missing out. Like it was unfair. He became quickly upset.

Jay knew he shouldn't because he had Heeseung all for himself.

So when he heard the older laugh along Sunoo, he didn't bother to say hello.

Ni-ki saw him walk in hurried steps and decided to quickly greet the members. "Hey, we'll be in Jay's room watching a movie."

"Where's Jay?"

Heeseung stood up from the floor, hoping the urge in his voice didn't sound suspicious.

"Okay. If you want to, I can bring you guys popcorn in a moment."

Ni-ki nodded, giving Sunoo a peck on the forehead and heading to the rooms to look for Jay.

"Hyung?"

"Yes?"

The older was indeed in his room, putting things on their place and adding some blankets and cushions to his bed.

"Are you.." he shook his head. "Are you ready for the movie?"

"Yes, let's watch it. Don't record me if I get scared, okay?" He warned, feeling a bit more relaxed with Ni-ki's playful stance.

Ni-ki hurried to set the movie on his laptop after they changed into pajamas, and soon, they were sitting against the headboard as the movie started to play.

Although the beginning of it was calm, Jay would lie if he said he wasn't scared.

He was pretty inmersed on it and almost jumped when the door opened.

It was Heeseung, so Jay tried not to look away from the screen. "Hey, here's your snacks."

"Thank you, hyung." Ni-ki took the bowl, and was about to place it in between him and Jay. He would have done it if it wasn't for the arm that suddenly wrapped around his waist. He tensed and simply continued holding the bowl.

"Is there anything else you need?"

Ni-ki noticed he wasn't the one being asked, so he decided to pretend he was foused on the movie and answered when Jay didn't. "Not for now, thank you."

Heeseung frowned. "Jay?"

"I'm fine. We're watching a movie, so..."

Heeseung looked around, taking Jay's favorite blanket from the bed's end and trying to place it over their bodies.

Even as he did, Jay acted as pity as possible, pouting and cuddling further into Ni-ki. Heeseung worried, not because he was acting jealous, but rather because he was acting as a little.

"Thanks, hyung," Ni-ki looked at Heeseung and nodded.

He didn't know what was going on, but he wasn't about to let go the opportunity of one of his hyungs being cuddly with him.

"Jay? If you need anything, you can tell Ni-ki, or you guys can call me."

Jay felt his face turning red. He was completely acting as a little even if he wasn't completely in his headspace. Surely Ni-ki would guess there was something going on.

However, the younger didn't say anything once Heeseung left, and Jay was extremely grateful as they continued just watching the film.

Chapter Text

Jay was too embarrased to lift his head after Heeseung left. The movie was playing and Ni-ki was paying attention to it, and despite it being a horror film, Ni-ki's breathing was pretty calm.

He could tell, because his head was basically laying on Ni-ki's chest.

"Hyung?"

The oldest closed his eyes, pretending to sleep just so he didn't have to explain what had just happened. Or why he had a grab for dear life on the maknae's pajamas.

"Okay," Ni-ki laughed sligthly, "I know you're not actually asleep, and I won't ask you to move. Do you still want to watch the movie?"

"Yes," Jay murmured, turning his head just enough to be able to look at the screen.

It was comforting knowing that Ni-ki was okay with whatever was going on with Jay. He didn't try to pry, didn't make questions, didn't make jokes.

And, contrary to Jay's expectations, the movie was pretty entertaining.

They were about halfway through the film when the jumpscares began. Jay tried not to be afraid, but he had always been pretty jumpy when it came to anything close to suspense.

"Oh gosh," he closed his eyes for a moment at an intense scene, clutching Ni-ki's sweater on his fist.

"It's going to be on the bed, not under," Ni-ki tried to guess about where the movie's monster would appear to surprise the protagonist. And Jay tried to watch.

"How do you know?"

"Predictable, and also because the music is still building up." Ni-ki's voice was tinted with his smile, as he loved the adrenaline of horror films.

On the other hand, it was becoming too much for Jay.

He smoothly and unintentionally switched to his headspace, detaching his little from the current events and the movie. So he just happily closed his eyes, trying to get cozy against Ni-ki, which worked only for a moment.

"Look look!"

When little Jay obediently looked at the screen, the monster appeared on the protagonist's bed, just as Ni-ki had predicted.

The loud eerie music, the actor's scream, and the horrible physical appareance of the movie's monster, were all too much for little Jay.

He didn't scream, but he started crying and clutching his hands even harder around's Ni-ki's clothes. He tried looking around for Heeseung, or a comforting face, but the room was pitch black and in his mind, the monster was aroud.

"Jay hyung?" Ni-ki paused the movie as soon as he felt Jay's body shaking. He closed the laptop but that only made the room darker, and the little more scared, too.

"No! It's here!" Jay cried in a combination of English and Korean. He was confused, terrified, and wanted nothing but the lights on.

Ni-ki wrapped one of his arms around the older, pulling him closer and basically onto his lap, while he looked for a phone around the bed with the other hand. "Jay, it's just us here," he finally found his and turned the flashlight on, pointing it to the roof.

Jay looked at Ni-ki through his tears, studying his expression until he decided Ni-ki was telling the truth.

"It's just us... Do you want me to turn the lights on?" Jay nodded. "You.. you have to stay here for a second."

"No."

"No?" Ni-ki almost laughed at the authority in Jay's voice. He was confused at it all, and still decided to go along with it. "Okay, then hold on."

He got up, with only one arm still around Jay's waist and faith on his own strenght which was barely enough to support all of Jay's weight. It only took a couple of steps for Ni-ki to reach the switch, and by that moment, Jay had already stopped crying.

However, he didn't let go. Instead, he sighed in relief and leaned his head on Ni-ki's shoulder.

"Are you comfortable?"

"Hmm," Jay made a confirmation sound, too tired to speak after the adrenaline rush. 

Ni-ki frowned. He knew what was going on. It was easy to figure it out as he frequently spent time with little Sunoo.

He walked around the room, slowly and carefully as he kept holding their second eldest in his arms. Ni-ki's brain filled with past moments, frantically looking for a clue, for any indication that could tell him his hyung was a regressor.

"Jay?" Ni-ki sat back on the bed, making sure Jay was comfortable as he covered him with a blanket. "Are you... are you little?"

Jay giggled.

His little didn't mind at all that Ni-ki was finding out what he had struggled so much to hide. His little could only care about being in someone's arms at the moment.

Ni-ki was startled when the door opened, and Heeseung came in.

"Hide," the maknae whispered to Jay, feeling anxious right away while trying to think of an excuse as to why Jay was cuddling on his lap.

"Is he okay? What happened?" Heeseung was quick to lock the door and made his way towards them. "Jay?"

"The movie was too scary," Ni-ki covered Jay's face with the blanket when it slipped a bit from his head.

Heeseung smiled lighlty, knowing there was no way Ni-ki didn't know. "Jay, baby, are you little right now?"

Once again, Jay simply giggled.

"You... know about it?" Ni-ki frowned.

"I do. Was he a little when he got scared?"

"Yes. Why didn't you tell us? Why didn't you tell me?"

Heeseung shook his head, "it wasn't my secret to share. Jay is starting to accept himself as a regressor, please understand he didn't hide it with bad intentions."

The oldest noticed Ni-ki's teary eyes, and loved the way he pulled Jay closer. He was still sure their members were trustable with such situation.

He knew he wouldn't have to worry as much now.

-

"Good morning."

Jay stepped into the kitchen the following morning. At the table were Heeseung, Jungwon and Sunoo taking their breakfast.

"Morning," Sunoo smiled, pointing to the counter. "We already heated water for your tea."

"Thank you," he walked with his eyes set on the mug.

That early morning he woke up to the memories of last night. He knew Ni-ki was aware of his headspace, and he felt ashamed at the way he had clinged to their maknae without any warning.

Heeseung surely would say something about it if they were alone in that kitchen.

Jungwon pointed to a pan on the stove. "Ni-ki made some 'American style' brakfast in case you want to risk yourself and try it."

"Okay." Jay laughed quietly, nervous at the mention of their youngest.

Before he could react, Heeseung got up. "Let me help you heat it."

Jay looked at him wary, knowing that his hyung was acting this kind because of his regression. "Thank you," he whispered, holding his mug close to his chest for support.

"No worries," Heeseung flashed him that gorgeous smile of his, which only made Jay more anxious.

"He- he knows." Jay said in a soft murmur, trying to be as quiet as possible.

Heeseung hummed, "he does."

Jay got closer, "what do I do?"

"Well... it went well, didn't it? It's the second- no, it's the third time. The decision is yours, it's up to you to make it known now... or let it happen little by little."

Jay pouted, looking at his tea. Then he let it down on the counter and moved to hug Heeseung.

"I'm scared... I don't want to say it on my own."

"Jay?" Jungwon stood up, followed by Sunoo who held the leader's hand.

"Hyung, let's give them time alone."

Heeseung smiled at Sunoo, proud that he was faith to cover for Jay's secret. "It's fine, Sunoo. Wonie should know it now, anyway."

"Is he okay?" Jungwon crossed his arms.

Heeseung nodded, passing his fingers through Jay's hair to soothe him. "He is. There is something he needs to say, your hyung is just shy."

"Jay is shy?" Jungwon smiled, "Our hyung became shy now?" He teased lightly, touching Jay's back with light fingers, just to reassure him. "Jay hyung? You can trust me."

Heeseung pressed his lips close to the little's ear to whisper, "whenever you're ready."

Jay nodded, turning to face Sunoo and Jungwon. However, he didn't get away from the oldest.

"Can you call the others?" he asked Sunoo, and the shorter complied immediately.

"Should we go to the living room?" Jungwon offerend and they followed.

Soon, they were all in sitting in the couches as Jay and Heeseung stood in front of the TV. They still had less than an hour left before their schedules, so Jay tried to overcome the panic fast.

"I... have something to say. It's a- well, it was a secret, which some of you already figured out."

Ni-ki sat up straight at that, with worry all over his expression. He only relaxed a bit when Sunoo whispered something in his ear.

"I kind of knew this before we even met each other, but I wasn't sure it had a name... didn't even know it was a thing."

Heeseung put a hand on his lower back, to show him support and let him know he could continue.

"I don't... I'll just say it. I'm a little... as in a little little."

"What?" Sunghoon sat up. "A little... as in Sunoo kind of little?"

Sunoo turned to him, "what other kind of little do you even know? Yes, he's a baby, I told you guys." He smiled proudly.

"I'm... not a baby. I think... I don't know. I just know they're definetly regressions."

Jungwon's eyes were full of tears, and Jay felt scared. He didn't know what his reaction meant, as the leader's face didn't show a clear emotion.

"You're a little? And... you were a little in front- oh gosh. The time you fell asleep? When I scolded you?"

"Which of all?" Jay tried to joke, but Jungwon wasn't having it.

Before Jungwon could hate himself even more, Jake interrupted him. "I'm sorry, Jay. I was sorry before but now I regret it all even more-"

"Don't, Jakey. You didn't know because I didn't want anyone to know."

Sunghoon frowned, standing up, "there was a good reason for that, wasn't there? I accused you of... of pretending you were a baby and... you were at the time. Weren't you?"

"I wasn't. Not completely that time anyway. I was trying to hold it back and- Sunghoon, don't." Jay got away from Heeseung's warmth to hold the younger's hands. "I don't blame you for that night, I don't. I was trying to hold back, and of course you didn't know what was really going on. You were protecting SSnoo."

"Sunghoon," Heeseung called too, "don't worry, he understands. We went throuh it already, and also he'll understand one day that it's okay to be angry, too."

Jay cringed, knowing Heeseung didn't completely agree with him defending Jake and Sunghoon's actions at any level.

But that was not relevant any longer.

"What matters is that I do feel ready to share this now. Please don't pity me?"

"I don't- we don't," Sunghoon promised. "It's just that it's painful to think on the words we said, and things we did when you were so vulnerable."

Sunoo stood up as well, agreeing. "I do still hate that you guys made my baby- I mean Jay, you made Jay fall the day I was nursing him. But he's right... let's focus on the present."

Ni-ki got up and pulled Sunoo towards him with a smile. The older complied and just stared at the others with a pout.

"I... I don't know what to say. Honestly, it does hurt to know that you didn't tell us... that you didn't tell me. But it hurts more to know that you went through it in silence, and that you had to watch us dote on Sunoo while you probably needed it too. Didn't you?"

Jay smiled in sympathy, "I did. I don't want to think about that. I don't want to be sad."

Heeseung found his way to him right away, comforting the second oldest as soon as their hands touched.

Jake smiled at them, "can we be happy? I really can't supress my smile anymore. You are a little? I wouldn't have seen that coming, I mean- having one is already impressive and unique. This is even better."

Jay looked down. Still unsure and insecure about himself. He still didn't think it was something appealing, but he promised himself -and Heeseung- that he wouldn't shy away from trying to understand it.

"He's really cute, and quiet." Ni-ki shared, showing off that he knew about it. "So sad that we have to practice and you guys will have to wait to see him."

"What? You got to see him? How unfair," Jungwon complained, smiling at the thought of his soulmate as a regressor.

"And he has this cute corn that he named-"

"No! Sunoo!" Jay ran to cover his mouth as his own face turned red.

"Why? It's cute!" He promised, running away and hiding behind the other hyungs. "Mason Cornwell!"

"Dude!"

They joked around and asked more questions until it was time for them to go.

The practice went smooth, their classes felt short, and their day felt lighter.

As they arrived home Jay could feel that tingling at the back of his head, letting him know it would be a good time to regress.

Heeseung noticed and reached to hold his hand again, as he had been doing the whole day.

"I'll be by your side."

Jay smiled, trusting the other with his regression.

"I know."

Chapter Text

"Jay hyung? Do you want to play with me?"

Jay looked up from the dishes he was washing. Sunoo was standing by the kitchen door, wearing fuzzy socks and a cute jumper.

In his hand, he was holding a set of Play-Doh box.

"Um... Are the others around?"

"I don't know... I'm not little yet, I just feel like playing with this if you're okay with it."

Jay smiled, "okay."

Sunoo clapped in excited and they made their way to the living room. It was an early evening, the sun had already settled due to the winter time, yet their living room was warm.

"Are you comfortable with those clothes?"

Jay looked down at himself, and went to his room to quickly change his clothes. He decided to put on the biggest sweatshirt he ownend, along with loose sweatpants and simple socks.

When he went back to the living room, Sunoo handed him a pair of socks. Probably more fuzzy than Sunoo's own.

"Here, I got them in green for you."

The oldest nodded and thanked him in a low voice.

Sunoo had already settled the foamy mats on the floor so they could be more comfortable. At first, Jay only looked through the different molds and tools while paying attention to the sound around them.

After a few minutes he concluded that no one would suddenly pop into the living room. So he considered it safe to play.

"Can I use any color?"

"Yes!" Sunoo moved the containers closer to Jay, showing him how many colors there were available and which ones he considered the prettiest.

They talked for a few minutes as they built whatever object and figure they could think of.

It was until twenty minutes or more had passed that Sunoo noticed Jay's figures were starting to become more and more misshaped.

"What is that?"

Jay looked up at him, holding in his hand a ball of brown dough. "Elephan."

Sunoo couldn't hold back his big smile because that was the last animal he could have thought of when looking at Jay's creation.

"Well, it's missing its ears.. but it's pretty."

"Pretty," Jay repeated, setting the elephant next to the rest of the animals he made.

Although Jay had already regressed, Sunoo couldn't allow himself to do so, too. He felt a strong sense of protection over their other little. He guessed it was due to previous events, but also because he knew Jay could get really little in his headspace.

The giggles and murmuring between them eventually caught the other's attention. Jungwon and Sunghoon had been taking naps in their room since earlier.

"Sunghoon, are you awake?"

"No."

Jungwon sat up to throw a pillow towards the older. "I'm serious, did you hear that?"

"What?"

"It sounded like aegyo."

"Ew."

Jungwon stood up to hit Sunghoon's thigh, "I mean aegyo as in little Sunoo. Or little Jay."

Sunghoon stood up almost immediately at the mention of little Jay. Jungwon didn't tease him about it only because he was focused in putting his slippers on to go to the living room.

The littles were making food shapes when they entered the room. Jay, who was babbling about a burger he made, went silent as soon as he saw them.

"It's okay, Jay. They're friends."

Sunoo was still out of headspace, so he held Jay's hand and told him that they could still play and that the others were not going to scold him.

The little stared at them, wary of their movements. When they finally settled on the sofa, he stopped playing. Despite Sunoo's comforting words, he felt shy and unsure of what was going on.

This was the first time these two members got to see his little side, so he wasn't familiar on how to act around them.

He grabbed one of the doughs and kept on pressing it without a purpose, all while still staring at the other guys.

No longer after, Heeseung came into the living room.

"Hey little one, what are you playing at?"

Jay's smile beamed for a moment when he heard the other's voice. Sunoo also smiled in happiness, finally feeling the atmosphere safe enough to regress himself.

"We make food!"

Jungwon reached towards Sunoo with his hand, petting his fluffy hair and praising him for the shapes he made.

"They are so cute," Sunghoon tried to cover his mouth to hide a bit of his excitement, but the emotion on his voice was impossible to miss.

Ignoring that, Jay held the ball of dough for Heeseung to grab it. Then, he kept staring at Sunghoon and Jungwon with no expression of emotion on his face.

"Is he mad at us?" Sunghoon whispered close to Heeseung, worried that Jay might be uncomfortable or resented towards them.

"I think he just needs time to get used to this. Right, Jongseongi? Our baby is just shy."

The little didn't answer, but he did stop staring at the others. He then focused on Sunoo while fidgeting with his hands in silence.

"Baby, this is your elephant, play with it!" Sunoo suggested, placing several of the animal figures in front of Jay even if Jay kept just looking at the other little's hands.

A few minutes passed when the front door opened. It was Jake and Niki who had finally arrived from their personal schedules. They were lured into the living room by Jungwon and little Sunoo's conversation, and soon figured out what was going on.

"Jay!" Ni-ki greeted while still taking his scarf off as he stood by the living room's entrance.

When Jay saw him, he giggled and stood to sit beside Heeseung. He tried to hide behind his caretaker, playfully looking for Ni-ki's attention in a sort of peek-a-boo game.

"He's so cute!" Jake remained standing while watching the interaction, giggling himself at the scene.

"Cute baby," Sunoo agreed, taking some figures to give to each of the members.

Heeseung was extremely relieved that Jay was now playing, even if it implied the younger grabbing and shaking his arm and shoulder to hide from Ni-ki.

"I wonder where he is... oh! There!" Ni-ki did his best to play along. He wouldn't admit it but he was proud that little Jay was smiling because of him. It also felt like a compensation somehow, making up for the night he made Jay cry with the horror movie.

"Jay, I made a cat for you, here." Jungwon stood up and, with careful movements, he handed him a small Play-Doh cat.

The little smiled, now happy and more comfortable at being next to Heeseung. "Thank yu."

He tried to answer in Korean, and although it sounded strange, everyone could understand him.

When Sunghoon handed him a penguin, he laughed and then thanked him too.

Then the rest started giving him shapes, especially Sunoo, and Jay gladly took them all while laughing.

"Okay baby, maybe let's put them with Sunoo's, because I can't carry them anymore."

Heeseung ended up being the one holding all the figures on his hands and lap, because Jay wouldn't leave his side.

Ni-ki noticed the struggle, so he decided to give it a try. "Come here Jay, let's play together."

Jay stared at him for a moment, at how he was now sitting on the middle of the mattress, and eventually followed along.

Jake looked around the room and smiled satisfied and with a bit of amusement. It looked like a family reunion. Heeseung and Sunghoon were chatting while holding figures on their hands, Jungwon was trying to clean all the small pieces of dough, and Ni-ki seemed as an older brother for the littles.

The pictures he took would go straight to their shared LITTLE folder in his gallery, which he made sure to change to OUR LITTLES.