Chapter Text
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Hua Cheng couldn't believe what he was seeing.
Xie Lian was hanging from a rope looped around his neck.
His face down to his toes was pale and blue.
His shoulders slumped low, his white robes swaying in the soft wind flowing from the window.
Blood dripped from those robes from stab wounds. It pooled on the ground, a bloody dagger beside it.
Hua Cheng saw the scene and moved so fast and fluidly that one might think he practiced it.
He hadn’t.
He kicked up the dagger into his hand and cut down the rope holding Xie Lian and catching him as he fell
It mirrored that day when Hua Cheng fell from the city walls of Xianle and Xie Lian caught him.
But here the roles were reversed
And Hua Cheng was catching his beloved
Hua Cheng quickly cut the rope and caught Xie Lian when he fell.
Xie Lians' body was cold and panic took root in Hua Chengs' heart.
Logic flying out of the window.
Not realizing that because of his immortality, Xie Lian couldn’t die, Hua Cheng started resuscitating him while sending waves of spiritual energy into Xie Lian
Pump, pump, pump
Hua Cheng pushed at his chest
Pump, pump, pump
"Gege, Wake up…", He pleaded as tears began to fall.
"I can't lose you again…"
Pump, pump, pump
"Why did you do this!?" Hua Chengs' voice was raised to a shout as his mind became a whirlwind of thoughts and fears.
Pump, pump, pump
"Gege-!"
Hua Cheng stopped when he finally saw
His beloved opened his eyes.
At first, Xie Lian couldn't see anything and he could barely breathe
But when his vision cleared and he saw the crying face of his San Lang, Xie Lian instantly realized what a horrifying scene He had walked into.
Xie Lian tried to respond, but the moment he opened his mouth he ended up gasping for air and coughing instead.
Xie Lian tried to compose himself, taking a long moment before being able to reply.
"San Lang, I-" Xie Lian started.
"Why?"
Hua Cheng's voice cracked his face wet with tears.
"Why did you do such a thing?
Xie Lian tried sitting up, but San Lang grabbed at his arms making it hard to move off the floor.
"Are you so unhappy being with me that you rather wish for death?
"No, I-" Xie Lian struggled, trying to make San Lang let go. But the more he moved, the more his grip tightened.
"Did I hurt you in any way?-"
Xie Lian finally got his arm up to cup San Lang's face
"I'm sorry." The words were so light that anyone else wouldn't have heard them.
With Xie Lian's slightly warming hands, Hua Cheng broke out of his dark thoughts and looked down at his beloved, whose cheeks started to return to their original color, lightly pink and full of life.
"Gege…"
Xie Lian sat up and hugged him
Hua Cheng hugged him back he gripped Xie Lian like he was going to let go
"I'm sorry… I'm sorry"
Xie Lian didn't know how else he should explain himself… how does one go about explaining their decision to hurt themselves?
So the only thing he could do for now was say he was sorry…
Slow darkness crept into his vision before he passed out, still hugging the cold ghost body of his beloved…
***
By the time Hua Cheng looked at Xie Lian
He had already passed out from exhaustion.
Hua Cheng sighed as he picked Xie Lian up to take him to the bedroom. He laid him down with his hands on his chest, looking peaceful if one looked only at his face.
Any lower and one could see the rope marks around his neck and the faint, freshly healed stab wounds one wouldn't see at first glance.
Hua Cheng left the room and went to his office.
He rubbed at his temple, trying to think of what could have made Xie Lian do that.
I have been keeping watch on him for years… and yet I didn't see? I've never removed the butterfly-
He sat up straight when he realized that, yes, he had removed them… but only for a short while when Xie Lian had gone to visit his parents' tomb on Mount Taicang
this morning.
Xie Lian had said he'd be visiting them alone this time… even though he had brought Hua Cheng down there already.
Out of respect Hua Cheng hadn't sent any butterflies with him and had just sent him over with a roll of his dice.
When Xie Lian had gotten back that night he had said he was fine… That he just needed to rest… Hua Cheng had never suspected a thing was wrong… he should have.
Hua Cheng threw an ornamental statue from his desk towards the wall.
"What the HELL happened on that Mountain to make MY GEGE do THAT!?", he shouted into the empty office as he punched a hole into the wall with his left hand
"Aargh"
Dice held tightly in his right hand and Eming vibrated like crazy on its display.
Hua Cheng made a promise to the fates of this world.
"I promise.. that whoever was the cause of this will pay for hurting my Gege."
He straightened up, tossed those dice he was holding, and walked out of the
room, which held that eternal promise within its walls.
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