Chapter Text
Honestly, Rox did not enjoy wearing such formal clothes, although he did look fancy and charming. It was tradition by now that every month his mom’s business associate and his family would come over to have dinner, and for some reason the occasion had to be rich in pompous clothes and food. Cashmere sweaters, turkey in the middle of a beautiful assortment of berries, cloves, herbs- never any garlic, though- and, of course, tons of seafood dishes that his mom loved to make. He and his sister Rose would help their mom cook for days in advance, and the lecture length courtesy-lessons-mid-turkey-stuffing from her were always a nightmare. Why it mattered so much that a simple business dinner needed to be held at such high importance, Rox was not sure. He knew his mom was one of the big time CEOs in the city, truly a girlboss by definition, but the whole dinner is treated almost in a manner of life and death. It was just another pretentious CEO from a partner corporation; and sure, the guy did seem to always have a stick up his ass, as well as his three sons, but Rox thinks he would rather stick to t-shirts and shorts in his own damn house than kiss the ass of a millionaire, thank you very much.
Though, he had no choice. So really there was no need to complain.
He picked through the short, thick and bleached coils of his hair one last time, making sure that it looked decently poofy. He then straightened his plaid blazer and tie, both his favorite shade of pink, and let out a deep sigh. Looking at himself, he looked decently convincing as a male. Of course, his therapist tells him that he should never focus on that, but as he was about to be in the same room as four cis men, he knew it would matter, and it would matter a lot. Luckily, he met them after he had already been on Testosterone for a while, but every now and then he'd catch prolonged glances in his direction, as if they somehow knew. He swallowed a lump of dysphoria down his throat. He would specifically always catch one of the Striders, the oldest son, sneaking glances at him across the table. It always made him uncomfortable.
A gentle knock from the door wenched Rox from his thoughts. When he turned to look, his older sister, Rose, poked her face through the frame. As per usual, she was stunning. Loose platinum coils bounced playfully around her face, which charmingly contrasted her smooth dark skin. She curled the corner of her lips up into a smile.
“Dinner’s almost ready.” She fully let herself into the doorway, where she revealed an elegant, silk, and purple gown draped across the figure. It hugged her lightly built physique splendidly, showing off her muscular arms and her feminine curves. A silver sparkle caught his eye and he noticed the diamond necklace around her neck, one she wore often. It was similar to the diamond ring Rox had that he was gifted to by his mom, just as Rose had been. He thumbed the band around his finger.
“Seriously, do you and mom always have to upstage me?” He sighed, taking a once over at his own outfit now, which just looked silly in comparison. Rose giggled softly and stood beside him, making sure to straighten out the hem of his suit, which he had forgotten was crooked.
“I think you look very handsome. I like the plaid on you. I heard it can make you look taller.”
Rox scoffed. He was definitely lacking in that department, as Rose was basically a giant in heels compared to his meager frame.
“ Really? ” He turned to pout at his older sister, who just laughed in his face in return.
“Have you done your affirmations yet? You know how important they are.” She hummed and brushed her fingers through Rox’s dirty blond curls. He sighed and turned to look up at her, an unamused expression on his face. She tilted her head, patiently awaiting his response. Rose really was like a second therapist to him.
He turned back to face the mirror and stood up a little straighter.
“You are Rox Lalonde. You are a man. You look like a man. You don't care what the rich white people have to say.” He breathed a sigh of relief at his own words, which were comforting enough, and headed downstairs with his sister.
______________________________
The Striders showed up in their very burgundy lowrider, which was so glossy and smooth that it reflected the dying light of the sunset directly into his eyes, and he had to squint to see past the glare from the window. The front grill was custom, shaped to look like a pair of pointy sunglasses, and the wheels had a distinct red trim that was more than enough to say ‘Whoever owns this car is rich! ’ (which of course, they were).
The first to step out of the car was the Patriarch Strider, who only ever called himself Mr. Strider, and Rox watched in awe. He wore a gothic three piece ensemble with amber accents, complete with a fucking cape, which was held in place over his shoulder by a sterling silver emblem. Rox recognized it as the same symbol on the front of the car, and he assumed it must be custom as well, and it was accompanied by a chain that hung from the symbol to his breast pocket. His whole look was completed by his accessories, which included velvet gloves, pointed dark shades, and of course, a top hat. Rose came up from behind Rox to look out the window of their dining room as well, making sure not to move the curtains in such a way that would alert the Strider to their presence.
“He’s going all out today, that’s for sure.” She pointed a side glance at Rox’s attire, trying to be subtle. Rox glanced at his sister with an exasperated expression.
“Next time, we’ll get you a cape.” She said, and Rox only managed to roll his eyes in response. They both looked back through the slit of the curtains, just in time to see the next Strider leave the car, the youngest one.
Hal Strider, who went a more casual route, arrived in a dark red rolled sleeve button up shirt, complete with a striped black vest, pants, and bright red sneakers. He had chains around his neck, the silver of which complimented the snakebite piercings on his bottom lip. Rox never thought to notice before, but he had the longest hair of the striders, with a ruffled blonde mullet snaking its way down his neck. Dave was next, who wore a three piece like his father, but his was all red from head to toe- as he was known to do, of course. Rox had never seen the middle child Strider in anything but bright red, dark red, and muted red. His suit was longer in the back, and it swished as he turned to talk to his younger brother, who was making a face at him. Rox couldn’t read lips, but he thinks he saw Dave say a curse at Hal. Hal laughed in response.
Finally, the oldest Strider son poked his head out from under the hood of the car. Rox felt his posture tighten as he studied his face, forgetting to actually analyze his matching black shirt and pants. An orange tie caught his eye, however, and he noticed hung from his neck like a noose, visibly squeezing his muscles. Can he even breathe? Rox wondered as he watched the oldest Strider stand uncomfortably with his hands in his pockets. Dirk then turned his head to the window where Rox and his sister were looking out of. His pointed shades matching the rest of his family blocked Rox from watching his eyes, but it wasn’t hard to tell that he was looking straight at Rox. He quickly hid from view, causing Rose to shuffle back in surprise. Her expression softened when she saw Rox’s nervous face, and she closed the curtains completely, successfully hiding them from his obvious gaze.
“You always seem to catch his eye, huh?” She faked a smile at her younger brother.
“He must like you.”
______________________________
Sweat began to form at his head as the conversation carried on around him, all the words and formal greetings foreign to his ears, despite the fact that he hears the same thing every month.
‘Hello Ms. Lalonde, looking lovely.’
‘Thank you, Mr. Strider, your sons are as charming as ever.’
‘Say hello, my sons.’
‘Say hi, my children.’
And so on.
And then they all sat around a table and sipped on wine, (the only decent part of the evening,) and then started on the appetizer. Tonight it was calamari, (also a highlight, he thinks.)
Rox often let himself fade into the background, overshadowed by his older sister and mother, who were arguably more impressive than he would ever be. It was an unspoken rule that he would remain silent unless spoken to, and most people present would oblige. All he had to do was smile sometimes, nod sometimes, laugh sometimes, and so on. He would even sneak in a little ‘Oh, really?’ to seal the deal. Regardless, he was never actually listening. They could be talking about nuclear launch codes and Rox’s head would still be in the clouds, dreaming of drinking wine alone in his room as a good movie played, or relaxing with one of his favorite books on his phone. There was a particularly good one he was into right now, one about gay vampire-human romance. He reimagined the scene he left off on, in which they were getting very close. The vampire, named Damian Van Steel, was leaning into the human main character, about to close his teeth on his artery. All the main character could do was close his eyes and reveal his neck even more. That was self destructive of him , Rox thinks. He didn’t usually like romances with vampires and humans because, seriously , who in their right mind would date a vampire? Before anything happened, though, the chapter had ended, and even though Rox was confused by it, he wanted more. He needed to know what happened next- did the human get killed? Would Damien stop himself? Would gay sex ensue?
Rox continued to ponder to himself as he smirked into another sip of his wine. However, as he was distracted by his thoughts, he almost didn’t notice that the glass was fresh out. Rox manage to rip himself from his own head as he sighed and reached for the bottle closest to him. This was the only night of the month his mom let him drink however much he wanted to, and he was definitely going to take advantage of that. Before he could snag the bottleneck however, a pale hand swiftly moved the bottle away. Rox frowned and looked up, only seeing his reflection across the table in the youngest Strider’s slightly pointed shades.
“Striders’ only.” He smirked like a cheeky little bastard.
Conversations stopped and suddenly everyone was watching their interaction. Rox managed to choke out a small “okay” and shrink into his seat, full of embarrassment. Why do they have their own separate wine bottle? That’s so stupid! He pursed his lips, wishing the collar of his suit would come up to swallow him whole so he could finally be excused from the dumb dinner for the rest of his life. He shouldn’t even be here, at least his older sister worked for his mom’s company. Rox was just an outsider to this whole business formal dinner and he couldn’t stand it anymore. Am I being put here just to suffer? He wondered.
“Rox, I almost forgot about you.” A deep, booming voice sounded from near the head of the table, and Rox nearly jumped from his skin. A dark chuckle rose from the bossman’s throat, and he wiped his mouth delicately with his mother’s handcrafted dishcloth.
“Always so quiet at these dinners. Tell me, boy, when are you hitting your growth spurt? You’ve always been so...petite.”
Rox was taken aback by the sudden comment about his build. He opened his mouth to retort, but Rose beat him to it.
“That was rude to point out.” Rose straightened her posture as she talked to the man through her glossy black lipstick, suddenly venomous in her speak. He did appreciate his older sisters defense of him, as he was premature. He barely hit 5’2 and weighed less than 110 pounds, a fact in which most men in their early twenties do not tell about themselves.
“My my, I do apologize. I was only kidding around.” He smiled a toothy grin and leaned in for a sip of their ‘Strider’s Only’ wine. Rox’s eyes curiously watched as a thick red coated his upper lip, which was quickly licked away. He’s never seen wine do that.
“Your frilly plaid suit doesn’t do you any favors, that’s for sure. Dave?” The head Strider snapped his fingers, and instantly the second oldest brother was at attention with a notepad and pen. How he got it out so fast was a mystery to Rox.
“Caliborn from Cherub Suits. You know the number don’t you? Write that down for Mr. Lalonde here.” He suddenly turned his attention back to Rox, a gaze so strong he could feel it through the black pointed shades.
“Tell the manager you know me, and put it on my bill. He knows what to do. He’ll... tailo r it and everything.” A smile tore through his face after that remark. Dave ripped the note from the pad and passed it across the table diagonally to Rox directly. Cautiously, he took it.
“What do you say, Rox?” A calm voice drifted from the head of the table like honey where his mom sat. She brushed aside her twisted golden locks and met Rox’s stare. Quickly, he glanced back at the bossman and nodded.
“Th-thank you. Sir.” His voice was hoarse as he squeaked.
Suddenly, the table shook, and the oldest Strider brother stood from his seat.
“I would like to be excused, Father, Ms. Lalonde.” His voice was clear and confident, but something strained laced the back of his throat. Mr. Strider looked in Roxanne's direction, and his mom gently nodded without a word. Dirk put a hand over his heart and bowed in return, then swiftly pushed in his seat and rushed out of the room. Rox let his eyes linger after him, curious as to where he would go. Normally, Dirk would be the most collected. In a weird way, most like Rox. He was silent, only spoke when spoken to, but unlike Rox there was a strange and constant mist around his quietness. Almost like he was afraid to open his mouth. In fact, Rox had never once seen him take a bite of his dinner, or a sip of wine. He watched warily as Dirk rushed down the hall and out the front door, into the night air. The door slammed with enough force to make Rox jump again.
His head turned to the sound of snickering in front of him as the youngest brother, Hal, held in a laugh. He nudged Dave next to him and they shared amused knowing looks. They were quickly shut down, however, by their fathers clearing of his throat. They both straighted up and went back to proper and formal and annoyingly perfect Striders. Rox hesitantly shrugged off the weird behavior and quietly asked his sister beside him for the ‘correct’ bottle of wine. If he wanted it before, he needed it now.
______________________________
After they finished the appetizer, Roxanne and Rose headed to the kitchen to grab the main course. Tonight's meal was roasted duck with a mushroom cream sauce. Rox wasn't a big fan of duck, but they had it often enough that he could swallow it without grimacing.
At least the wine is pretty amazing; that should help wash it down , he thought. While he savored the expensive wine from his family, he couldn't help but catch whispers from the two remaining brothers sitting across from him. Hal was leaning in close to Dave, having some kind of secret chat that the rest of the table wasn't supposed to be part of. Rox furrowed his brow in frustration.
Are they talking about me? He wondered, as well as wishing they could be a bit more discreet. He lowered his glass and peered in their direction, catching Dave's attention in the process. An abrupt elbow to Hal's side in the middle of his sentence silenced him instantly. A hint of anger, fueled by the alcohol he'd consumed, began to cloud Rox's judgment. It was enough proof for him to believe he was right, and for the first time at one of these dinners, he was finally going to speak up. He was going to stand up for himself. He took a deep breath, opened his mouth, and raised his hand like a flag on a battlefield.
“Y-”
“Ah! Duck. One of my favorites.” Their Father spoke from his seat as the Lalondes carried the duck into the dining room and placed it delicately onto the core of the table.
“That’s why I made it, Mr. Strider. It’s been marinating for a full day now.” Rox’s mom hummed at the gratitude from her guest and Rox sank into his seat.
“It smells great !” Hal piped up from across the dinner table, already stuffing his napkin into the front of his collar. Rox stayed silent, only taking a sip from his drink, as his mom began to slice into the formally alive animal to serve to her guests. The air stiffened around him as it was filled with the scent of cooked duck, and he willed himself not to scowl. Disregarding his pathetic attempt at standing up for himself, Rox was really not in the mood for food he hated. Abruptly, he felt a harsh vibration come from his pocket. He warily eyed the head of the table where his mom sat, who had banned phones from the table, and while she was distracted by a compliment of the food from Mr. Strider, Rox managed to sneak a peak at his phone screen.
‘A new chapter has been added to one of your favorites!’
Rox felt a surge of excitement and curiosity. He swiftly hid his phone again and looked around the table, where the rest in attendance had begun grabbing their portion of the meal. His sister grabbed a plate for him and filled it sparsely, leaving plenty of room for sides and other dishes on the table and placed it in front of him. She smiled. He appreciated it, but he couldn’t deny that the interest of his phone was pulling him strongly in it’s direction. He really had to go. He just had to know what happened to the main character. Anxiously, he stood from his seat, almost regretting his decision when all eyes at the table turned towards him.
“Uh...can I be excused? I need the restroom.” His voice wavered, rehearsing what his mother had taught him to say many times before. His mom, however, was not so easily convinced. Rox bit at his lip as she just glared at him.
“I drank a lot of water.”
She raised a perfectly sculpted brow.
“Please.”
Mr. Strider barked out a laugh after swallowing the bits of duck in his mouth.
“Don’t make him beg to wet his whistle, Ms. Lalonde. Just let the man pee.”
His mom just sighed, shaking her head.
“Be back soon or else you’re grounded.” She threatened. Rox nodded a little too harshly, then absconded from the dining room with fervor. He sped walked down the hall and to the front door, hoping to shake the scent of duck stuck to his nose with the fresh air outside. As he walked, he whipped his phone out and opened the book app where he usually read his stories. His face brightened when he saw that the story had indeed been updated, and almost let out a ‘yippee!’ in response. He jumped in place and carefully opened the door, his eyes glued to his phone as he walked outside.
“Are you sure you want this?” Damien asked with sweet nectar dripping from his voice. His cold breath pushed against the hairs of Royland’s neck, and the mortal sighed out a shaky breath.
“I need this.” Is all he said. Damien groaned from the back of his throat and let his lips brush against his lover’s neck, letting the anticipation of his bloodlust hang in the air.
“You’re perfect...” Damien spoke softly, “you smell perfect.”
Royland just laughed, letting his fingers lace through the taller vampires black hair.
“Then take me. I’m all yours.” Damien salivated at the words, opening his mouth in response. His fangs glimmered against the moonlight as he wound up his strike at Royland’s neck, and the human braced himself. All of a sudden-’
“What are you reading?”
Rox sprang his head up, a gasp wrenching from his throat before he could stop it. There stood the oldest son, tall and hunched against the pillar directly before him. A lit cigarette hung from his mouth, and he tilted his head down to meet Rox’s startled glance.
“Wh- I-” He turned his phone off and shoved it into his pocket.
“Nothing!” He said sharply, bringing his shoulders up to his neck. Dirk cocked his head to the side, a curious expression on his face.
“Your heart is beating like crazy. Must’ve been something .” Rox flung a hand to his chest, feeling the rapid drum of his heart against his fingers.
“How did you- No! It’s not!” He spat out, surprised the Strider could read him with such accuracy. Was his heartbeat that loud?
“What are you doing out here? I thought you went to the bathroom.” Rox said, attempting to change the subject. Dirk shrugged in response.
“Just needed a smoke break. These dinners agitate me.” His head shifted to the side, and Rox thought he caught a glimpse of a bright amber beneath his shades.
“Oh. Uh...me too.” Rox said, surprised that he and Dirk shared anything in common.
Dirk hummed a tone, then pushed himself off the pillar he was smoking against and swaggered to the space on the door next to Rox. He gestured to the cigarette in his hand and lifted his brows, as if to ask a question. Rox then realized that Dirk probably thought he meant he smoked too, and he internally judged wether or not he would correct him. Rox flicked his eyes between the cigarette and Dirk’s face, then reluctantly, took it without a word. He inhaled on the bud deeply, not expecting the immediate burning sensation that ripped through his throat and he coughed out hard. His sinuses stung with a unique piercing, and a tear jerked its way down his cheek once again.
“Jesus, dude, that is strong!” Rox managed to choke out between his coughs, and Dirk just huffed. After a few moments of trying to regain his breath, Rox finally was able to fully breathe again and realized he tasted something strange. He turned his head towards Dirk with a furrowed brow.
“What is that? It didn’t taste like tobacco. Or weed. Is that like...random herbs or something?” Dirk took the cigarette back from Rox while he talked and turned to inhale the bizarrely flavored smoke again.
“You could call it that. It’s a family recipe. Helps calm me down, most of the time.” Dirk said simply. Rox thought about it for a moment, then nodded. He decided he didn’t want to overstep and ask why .
“Is the wine a weird tasting family recipe too?” He questioned.
“All I can say is that you definitely wouldn’t like it.”
Rox felt his eyes roll so far back into his head he thought they might get stuck there.
“I like a lot of alcohol, just so you know. Even whiskey. I drink it sometimes.” Rox crossed his arms triumphantly at his admission. Dirk raised a brow and gave Rox what he felt like was a once-over.
“You shouldn’t drink whiskey. I have a feeling that even a glass would tip you over.”
Rox opened his mouth to protest, but quickly shut it.
“...Actually, you’re right. I passed out on the bathroom floor last time.”
Dirk blew an amused breath through his nose.
“Dirk Strider, always right.” He mused.
Rox shook his head at the overly cocky statement and let his eyes tug on the shades resting on the bridge of Dirk’s nose, before looking away.
“Wondering why I’ve got sunglasses on at night?”
Rox raised his brows up at Dirk.
“Huh? Oh, yeah. I guess. I’m kind of used to them, though.” Rox smirked as he looked down at his shoes, bashful at his failed attempt to sneak a glance at the weird accessory.
“It’s my dad. He’s got a thing for shades, makes all of us wear ‘em. He collects. Has hundred of pairs from all different time periods, it’s actually amazing.” Dirk talked into the night air, and only then did Rox understand that this was the first time he had ever heard Dirk speak for so long uninterrupted. He wondered if he spoke this much normally, and was only uncomfortable during dinner, but Rox couldn’t know. He based his entire perception of Dirk around a couple of stares and the inability to speak. A pang of guilt hit him.
“I’m sorry.”
Dirk swung his gaze back to Rox, a slightly shocked expression on his face.
“For the shades? Nah, it’s sweet. Makes us look badass.” Dirk said with confidence, and all Rox could do for a moment was stare with his mouth open.
“What? No. I guess I should’ve clarified.” He took a deep breath, then turned his whole body to face Dirk.
“I’m sorry for thinking you were a creep who never talked and had a staring problem. You are so not that.” Rox vocalized, balling his fists at his sides as he spoke. He was the kind of person who had to set the record straight, even if it was entirely unnecessary. Dirk just stared for a moment, then chuckled deeply.
“No, you’re right.”
“Huh?” Rox blinked rapidly. Dirk just tilted his head again.
“I am a creep with a staring problem. And I don’t usually talk at dinner, so that would also be accurate.” He puffed another cloud of smoke from his mouth. Rox relaxed his posture and looked on with interest.
“But you seem so...like...calm right now. And normal.” Rox said. Dirk just smirked, and just barely, Rox could see a hint of strain in his muscles.
“‘Cause I have to be.”
Confusion left Rox in such a swirl of questions that he almost didn’t notice when the front door suddenly swung open, letting the light of the foyer shine directly on the both of them. Dirk reeled, pulling his head away from the brightness, and Rox turned to see Rose and his mother standing sternly in the entranceway.
“When did you get out here?” His mom interrogated.
Rox shrunk again, the swirling questions immediately dying out as his mom’s shadowed face glared at him.
“I dunno, I just needed some fresh air,” he stated, bringing up a nervous hand to scratch at his head. Rox watched as Rose and his mom both shot pointed looks at Dirk.
“I believe I specifically asked your father to not let any of you alone with my son.” His mother scowled at Dirk, then grabbed Rox and yanked him back into the house, shutting the door behind him.
“Mom, what the hell!” He whined as his mother dragged him to the dining room, Rose following swiftly behind. When they arrived, his mother let go of her firm grip and glared daggers at the rest of the Striders.
“ Get out. ” She spat. Rox looked at her with surprise. He only ever heard her this mad when he broke one of her expensive vases when he was playing as a kid, and she never dared be mean to any of their guests- until now. Dave and Hal looked at each other, then pointed their glances at their father, who didn’t seemed bothered in the slightest. He simply smiled.
“Certainly, Ms. Lalonde.” He got up from his seat and cleaned around his platter, urging his sons to swiftly do the same. Once they were done, Mr. Strider gestured with his head for his sons to make their way to the front door, where Dirk was no doubt waiting still. As the two youngest Striders walked past Rose, Rox saw them all give each other pointed looks before continuing down the hall. Mr. Strider was last behind them, and he reached for a handshake with Rox’s mom. She just crossed her arms. He smiled again, brighter, and pushed past the rest of the Lalondes to meet his family at the door.
“Goodbye then. Roxanne. Until next time.” He didn’t look behind him as he waved, and he shut the door hard behind them, Leaving the hallway in an eerie quiet.
Not a moment went by before his mother began her lecture.
“So you don’t listen, is that it? When I tell you that you should be back soon when you leave?” She chastised, her voice carrying the weight of frustration and concern. Rox balled his hand into a fist.
“...Is that really what your mad about?” He said through his teeth.
“Excuse me?” She challenged. Rox accepted.
“Since when was I not allowed to be alone with a Strider?”
His mom pursed her lips into a thin line, her eyes betraying the depth of her worry.
“It’s for the safety of you and the safety of this family. You don’t need to know why.”
"What? Are you afraid I'll embarrass us? That I'll fall apart if I'm looked at the wrong way?" Rox's mom looked at him in disbelief, and her silence hung heavy in the air.
"You know that's not-" she began, but Rox cut her off, his voice filled with pent-up frustration.
“Of course it is! You treat me like a fucking kid!”
Rose’s eyes widened when Rox suddenly cursed at his mom, and he immediately regretted it. He knew a punishment was coming, as it did every time in the past he disrespected her. However, his mom just looked down at the floor, her previously crossed arms not hanging limply at her sides.
“Go to your room.” She said, “You’re grounded.”
Rox huffed in response, anger rising in his throat, but he knew better than to continue the interaction while he might say something worse. He spun on his heel and not-so-quietly stomped up the foyer stairs, grumbling to himself incessantly. When he got to his room he almost slammed the door, but to avoid an actual ass whooping, he softly closed it instead, then flopped onto his bed and screamed into his pillow. He couldn’t believe that he was 20 years old and his mom was still grounding him. She was always so overprotective of him and he never knew why, and it made him feel small. A wave of sadness washed over him and his stopped screaming to look at the ceiling. Dirk crossed his mind and he thought back to their small conversation, wishing it hadn’t ended when it did. There were still so many questions he needed to ask.
However, Rox then remembered his abandoned chapter that he was reading, and his mood lightened rapidly at the prospect. He took out his phone and picked up where he left off.