Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

You cannot believe that its been 10 years since you graduated that hell hole, more so, you cannot believe that after 10 years of growing up you’re returning, even if its only for one night.
Your high school fucking reunion.

You’re standing in your old bedroom, suddenly you’re 14 again. You’re the new kid in town, just moved to the east coast with your Bro. He needed to be up here for...for...what was it? Oh, right. For a new movie. And of course you got dragged into this. You recall the first few months of school, how painfully lonely they were, being a target of bullying because everyone assumed you were gay. You wanted to leave, but never told your Bro. You can remember how much you missed the Texas heat.
You run your fingers lightly over your old desk, making your way down the side, you open the top drawer.
There they are. Your old pointed shades.
You pick them up and blow the thin layer of dust off them. Shit Dirk, how’d you ever think these were cool? You position them on your face and look into the mirror. Years ago, you were tall and lanky, these shades sort of fit your face, and you only wore them for ironic purposes. Obviously. Now you’re all grown up. Your face and body filled out and the shades seem a little too small and out of place on you. And you thought they looked funny on you before.
You take them off and place them down on your desk.

Then you see it. An old photo that sits on the shelves next to your desk. You and your old three best friends smile at you from behind the frame. God, how old were you when this was taken? Sixteen? Seventeen? You can’t even remember, but you smile at the picture fondly.
On the far right of the photo is Jake, oh how you remember Jake. He was goofy, friendly, handsome, tan...how you silently swooned over that boy, not that you ever told him. Or told anyone for that matter. No, he only thought of you as a friend and you were more than happy to stay on that level.
Next to him stands Jane, one of the reasons you never attempted anything with Jake is because of her. Actually, last time you spoke to her--how many years ago?--you heard she and Jake were finally together. You ran into her up here, last time you ever visited the apartment, and she had just finished baking school. She told you Jake was studying abroad...digging up old Minoan ruins in...Greece? Jane said the two of them were very happy together.
You wonder if they will be at the reunion together.

Next to Jane in the photo is a younger, skinny version of you. And hanging on to you, smiling ear to ear is Roxy.

Roxy.
Your best friend throughout high school.
For fucks sake, how did you ever let yourself lose touch with her?
You can remember the first time you ever met her, clear as ever. It was one of the last classes of the day, you were a freshman, and you were sitting in the principal's office. Some guy had tried to pick a fight with you, shoving you into lockers and calling you gay. Tired of the torment, you pulled a knife on the kid. You didn’t use it, but you sure as shit got in trouble for it. So there you were, sitting and waiting to be punished.
It was about then the door to the office opened and in stormed an angry teacher, a small blonde girl swaying in tow. “Lalonde is intoxicated in class again!” He yelled, red faced at the secretary. She just sighed and told the blonde to take a seat.
She sat next to you, and you could smell the booze seeping out of her. You glanced over at her. She was beautiful, for being such a mess. Small, platinum blonde, with bright pink eyes. Noticing you looking, she gave you a dopey smile. She leaned into you and slurred, “my name is Roxy, who are you?”
“Dirk. Dirk Strider.”
She hiccuped, “thats cool. I realllly like your glasses.”

The more time you spent with her, the less she drank, and the closer the two of you became. She introduced you to her longtime friends, Jake and Jane, and for the first time in this school, you felt like you belonged.
Hanging out with Roxy also really helped with the bullying situation. A lot less people called you gay and eventually they stopped going after you. However, there were whispers in the hallways about you and her. Other students assumed you two were together, which didn’t bother you. What bothered you was people commenting on her, saying she was a drunk, easy, stupid girl.
You vowed to always protect her, and care for her. That might have been another reason you never fully pursued Jake, you were too occupied with Roxy.

Looking back on it now, you still aren’t sure how you felt about her then. You knew in the beginning she had a thing for you, everyone knew that part. But over time, she lost interest, or something of the sort. The two of you were just friends. And you had always been glad that you had her.
After all, being a teenager and figuring out your sexuality was hard enough, and although you never told her, you knew that Roxy knew.

Thoughts cross your mind as you continue to look at her in the photo. How you used to want to hold her, to run your fingers through her hair. How you wanted to kiss her, but never did. No. These desires were always overshadowed by your desires for Jake.

And then it hits you, like someone splashing you in the face with water. You loved her at one point, and you never did anything about it.
Reflexively you grab your shades off your desk.
Your palms start to sweat as you think about seeing her tonight. Adrenaline and nervousness fuel you as you start to walk out of your apartment.

Its your goddamned 10 year high school reunion. Tonight everyone is going to see how much you’ve grown up, and through that all, you are going to find Roxy Lalonde and...and...well actually you aren’t fully certain what you’re going to do about that.
You’d sure like to take her out to dinner sometime though.