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“Have you moved everything, Joonghyuk?” The man looked over at Sooyoung and nodded, carrying the last box from the car. Sooyoung suggested he move away from the city to the countryside where it was less noisy and frustrating, and Joonghyuk agreed with her. He wanted a place where he could focus more on his streaming. He hated the busy streets and crowds, alongside the people and fans knocking on his door.
“Do you need help with setting anything up?” Sangah asked, peeking behind the door. The two women decided to help Joonghyuk out in their free time, moving all his belongings to the new house. It had been years since they’ve known each other, to the point where they know how each other felt, although Joonghyuk was still a difficult man to understand.
“No need. You can go home and rest. I’ll take over from here.” He nodded again towards the women and they made their way out towards the van. The closer they got to the vehicle, the slower Sangah walked.
“Sooyoung.”
“Hmm, yes babe?”
“Where did you find this house?”
“Online. Is there something wrong?” Sangah hummed a reply. She turned her back to look back at the house. Or rather, the left window on the first floor.
“It’s nothing. Let’s go.” She pushed Sooyoung towards the driver’s seat and prepared to leave. She hoped Joonghyuk wouldn’t end up dealing with something difficult whilst living here. Back at the house, Joonghyuk sorted all the boxes out and folded them in a pile in the corner of the room. It took a few hours to place everything around the house but he was finished with unpacking. Glancing outside of the window, he grimaced at the dark sky. He should throw the boxes away tomorrow morning instead. Now that he was alone in this house, he stood in place for a few minutes before deciding to make dinner, a simple dish would do. But just as he arrived at the kitchen, he noticed a slip of paper on the kitchen table, which wasn’t there before.
“‘Have you come back, my beloved?’ Who wrote this?” Joonghyuk was cautious and puzzled. Sooyoung didn’t leave this message behind since she left hours ago, and no one would have entered the house since he locked all the doors before unpacking. He scanned the handwriting and thought it looked familiar. But he was getting hungry. “I guess it’s not important.” He placed the slip down and moved to the fridge. The slip of paper was soon left forgotten.
The next day, Joonghyuk woke up to find the same slip of paper on his bedside table.
“‘Do you not remember me?’ Is this…? What is this?” It was the same handwriting from yesterday, and most likely from the same person. He narrowed his eyes and observed his room, checking for any places which could be used as a hiding spot. But there were no places to hide. None at all. Once again, Joonghyuk could only ignore the slip of paper and continue with his day.
“This is strange… Sooyoung and Sangah said nothing about these notes being left behind.” He thought for a few seconds. “Don’t think it’s anything important…” He left the slip of paper again, leaving to make breakfast and prepare for his stream. He forgot about it soon after. However, the problem still occurred: after ending his stream for today, the paper was next to a drink with the message: ‘remember to take breaks and look after your health’. He knew there was no one in the house, yet there was a clean glass filled with water placed next to him. It wasn’t there when he started his stream and he never left his room. This was mysterious. As time passed and the day turned into night, Joonghyuk just washed up and was about to get into bed. And there it was, the slip of paper next to his bedside table.
“‘Have a goodnight, my beloved.’ This…” The man sighed with defeat. Maybe it was better to collect these notes than leaving them everywhere. He was too tired to deal with the problem. It clearly wasn’t any significant: he was never in a relationship in the past, so the fact this person thought he was their partner was strange. Although the slips didn’t really impact his daily life either.
“Here’s another one. What did they say this time?” Joonghyuk picked the paper up from his bookshelf.
“‘This was my favourite book. You bought it for me as a gift.’ I don’t remember buying a gift for anyone though?” Only a week had passed and these notes seemed to reveal more about the writer. They spoke of memories of their past and it seemed like they were in a loving relationship. Joonghyuk, of course, knew nothing about this but judging from what the writer wrote, it seemed like they had a close relationship. He picked the paper up and placed it in the glass jar he kept just for these notes. “It has already been a week and the jar is already half full…” Joonghyuk checked the jar and recalled the different notes written just for him:
‘Do you still like murim dumplings?’
‘You haven’t changed. You’re still the same Joonghyuk I know.’
‘Do you still remember our time together as children?’
‘Did you ever miss me?’
Joonghyuk never bothered to reply (he didn’t even know if a reply was needed or not) and left them in the jar, forgotten. The next time he received a note, it was slightly different.
“‘Joonghyuk-ah, do you know who I am? Do you not love me anymore?’” Joonghyuk finished reading and crumpled the paper. He didn’t know who they were and he never loved them from the beginning. Why should he if they were a stranger?
“Whoever you are, I never loved you. I don’t even know who you are. There’s no need to leave your notes around anymore. Leave.” He spoke loudly and clearly inside the empty house, his voice echoing. He was met with no reply, as he predicted. The temperature dropped and a slight breeze blew his hair but he paid no attention to it, only concentrating on stopping these notes from being left around. He pinched the bridge of his nose and realised how crazy he looked, talking to no one. There was another breeze, stronger than the last one; it sounded like faint muttering if you listened carefully. Joonghyuk turned to his left and saw a new note with only a name: ‘Kim Dokja’.
As more time passed, the more messier the notes started to get. Kim Dokja’s handwriting was starting to get illegible, with the same question repeated over and over again.
‘Do you love me?’
‘Do you love me?’
‘Do you love me?’
‘I love you Joonghyuk-ah. I love you.’
He decided to tell Sooyoung and she was in disbelief after hearing the situation.
“Why didn’t you leave the house then? We have a spare room at our house.” He didn’t want to leave. Although Dokja seemed to be losing their mind, and the notes were getting more strange, Joonghyuk didn’t want to leave.
“I’ll be okay. I can still stay there.” Sooyoung stared at him with shock and pursed her lips.
“You’re moving away from that house. I helped you move there, so I’ll help you move back.”
“There’s no need-”
“You’re moving.”
‘Are you leaving me behind again?’
“...”
‘Joonghyuk-ah. Please don’t leave me.’
“...”
Joonghyuk quickly got used to seeing these notes appear out of thin air, and so he ignored them. He wouldn’t be seeing them ever again once he moved away. He had a feeling of deja vu. He packed everything in boxes to move into this place. And now he was packing everything in boxes again to move out. The breeze was still the same, light and gentle, but the temperature dropped drastically. Joonghyuk picked up the last box and strolled towards the vehicle where the couple was waiting: Sooyoung was gesturing to the man to hurry up, however, Sangah was distracted. Like last time, she gazed at the left window on the first floor.
“Sooyoung, come with me for a moment. Joonghyuk, can you please look at the window on the left?” Without waiting for the man’s reply, she caught her girlfriend’s wrist and pulled her away for a bit.
“The left window?” Joonghyuk followed what Sangah said and noticed something strange. There was a faint figure with a hand placed on the window. Joonghyuk couldn’t see properly from a distance, so he could only make out the black hair and the white coat. He didn’t know who it was until they placed a sheet of paper against the window. So that was Kim Dokja. Yoo Joonghyuk met eyes with Kim Dokja.
‘Will you come back…?’
Joonghyuk continued to stare at Kim Dokja for a few more seconds before pulling away; he walked to the van to place the last box before calling for the two women. He was ready to leave. Seeing both Sooyoung and Sangah getting closer, Joonghyuk decided to leave with one last message. He whispered,
“I’m never coming back. I’m sorry.”