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Sometimes it feels as if the entire castle has their eyes on Lily and Marlene, watching as they grow closer in the fall of their sixth year.
The pair doesn't understand all the speculation, and they take to mocking it. Rolling their eyes at the stares and whispers, until they don't even notice them. Not when the other is by their side.
In Potions, their heads are bent, elbows knocking together companionably in the close space. Their work always comes in on time and without flaw. Yet, somehow, they still make time to share long looks, indulge in whispers and grins that draw curiosity and speculation from the other houses.
They are together during meals, hip to hip on the bench. Marlene tosses her head at something Mary says, and Lily sits, transfixed by the sway of her ponytail. When Marlene catches her, Lily scrunches up her nose and sticks out her tongue, and then it’s Marlene who is transfixed. Lily laughs, leaning gently into her side, so she’s nearly in the other girls lap.
They become Gryffindor’s secret. Something fiercely guarded, to be protected from prying eyes that would turn whatever is happening between them into fodder for gossip.
At night, they each retire to their respective beds, so they’re on the opposite side of the room. When the lights go out, the room comes alive with whispers about the day, and what to expect from the next. Slowly, the room quiets, as they fall asleep, one by one.
But the distance proves to be too great because in the morning, more often than not, Marlene is found in Lily’s bed. They sleep tucked against one another. They are an undignified tangle of elbows and knees.
When they wake, the other girls are going about their business, giving Lily and Marlene some time to untangle, sharing sleepy smiles, before reminding them about practical things like uniforms and breakfast before Transfiguration.
The other girls keep it between them, with all of the solemnness of an Unbreakable Vow.
At the first Quidditch match of the season, Lily wears Marlene’s sweater, with her number emblazoned on the back. She only has eyes for the Chaser who flies like a bat out of hell. She winces at Marlene’s close calls, and shouts her encouragement.
Her heart is on her sleeve
For the first time, the castle thinks they may understand what’s going on, after all.
When Gryffindor wins, Lily shouts herself hoarse, alongside Mary and Emmeline. They hug and dance in place, until it’s time to go inside and go about the business of celebrating.
In the middle of the Great Hall, Lily waits. When Marlene appears with the rest of the team, covered in a fine layer of sweat and grime, Lily throws her arms around the other girl, and they stay that way for some time.
They sway together, and Lily presses her face into Marlene’s neck, whispering things that make the dark haired girl grin and flush a lovely shade of pink. Marlene’s teammates pretend not to notice, but fail at smothering their smiles and playful eye rolls at the pair.
Winter comes, and the pair is secretly thrilled by the cold. The world turns gray, and they couldn’t be more alive. Two bright spots of color, coming together to make up for the absence of light and warmth.
They are happy to spend nights together in front of the fireplace in the Common Room, surrounded by friends and books. Lily pours over notes, with Marlene’s arm draped over her shoulders. When she needs a break from the quiet, she closes her book, gently tugging Marlene’s ponytail to get her attention.
Winter is the time for sneaking off. The castle is their playground, even if they are too old for playground games. They run the halls, hands clasped tight. One leading, one following with a chorus of WeCan’tGetCaught and Shit,HurryHurryHurry. There are too many close calls to count, and they just laugh, muffling the sound with each other’s hands, until hands roam elsewhere, eagerly replaced by mouths.
Spring brings about an unexpected restlessness. Marlene and Lily are closer than ever, but there’s discord they can’t give name to.
They remain partners in Potions. They sit next to one another during meals.
The Gryffindor girls are the first to know, when they no longer wake up in the others bed. On the heels of that development, is the arguing. They hear the hushed versions of it, as furious whispers are traded, giving away to stony silence.
Lily is the one to finally come out with it.
“It’s too much,” she says, vaguely waving her hands to encompass whatever it is.
Marlene is trying not to cry, and she feels like the worst sort of idiot because she doesn’t cry over this sort of thing.
But it’s made marginally better when Lily approaches her cautiously, so close that Marlene can count the freckles on her cheeks, bringing a hand up to lightly tug Marlene’s ponytail. It makes Marlene laugh weakly, and Lily helps her wipe gently at the tears spilling onto her cheeks.
Lily’s done it since first year, a fond habit that says more than words can. That maybe things will have to be different now. Maybe they can’t be that close without losing too much of themselves, but they’ll still be them, no matter which way this goes.
“This isn’t the end?” Marlene doesn’t mean for it to come out as a question, but her voice betrays her.
“Not even close,” Lily promises. “Unless you want it to-“
“Of course not.”
“Okay, then.”
The castle is left baffled by the duo.
The whispers are re-ignited. Did they break up? Were they ever together...together, together? How are they still friends?
And Lily and Marlene, who have always occupied their own world, separate from the gossip and questioning stares, can’t even find it in themselves to pretend to care.