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James had loved music and dance since he was young. Like really young. He remembered going to the local movie store with his mom when she went to the market. It was a treat after a day full of walking around. He would pick one up, usually the one with the most colorful cover, and hand it to his mom who would ask the seller if it was appropriate before paying for it and putting it in a bag.
When they got home, he would always try to run off with it. But his mom would scold him and told him to help her with the rest of the things they had bought. Then she would help the small boy put the movie into the DVD player. The moment it started playing, James would smile brightly. When the dance scenes came on James would try following along, not always successful but having fun.
Now James was 24, and yet he was still the same six year old boy at heart. He still loved bollywood. He loved the dance and the music that it had. But now instead of following along with a TV screen, he was on the TV screen. He had gone to London a few years back, trying to make his parents proud and study law. He came back to them with some white French boy who had been estranged from his family, but no law degree. His parents weren’t as disappointed as he’d thought they would be. They took in Sirius, the estranged French boy, with no issues. Well, unless you want to call the whole one-hour conversation he had to have to convince his parents Sirius was in fact not his boyfriend an issue.
After a few months of still living with his parents at 20 years of age, James started questioning what he was doing with his life. So, when he found an ad basically begging for dancers for some movie, he went for it.
The movie ended up becoming a bigger deal than anyone could have imagined. And James, who had gotten a bigger role than he thought he would, got plenty of good attention. He knew bollywood was his calling; not law, that much was for sure.
Four years after his first movie, James was finally the star of a film. He had even gotten himself his own studio room to practice and rehearse.
Today, though, he just wanted to go to the studio to unwind. Sirius’ boyfriend Remus had just moved in and, even though he and James had gotten along, they hadn’t quite figured out the roommate thing. Plus, Sirius’ brother was coming soon. James couldn't remember the date, but Sirius had been pacing around the house the last few days so it must be coming up.
So, today he was practicing, music blaring, and he wasn't even aware he had left his door open. It was James and his music, dancing together like old friends. Because they were old friends. When James danced, he danced for him. Not his parents, not his friends. Just him. Because dance was his life. When he started doing it professionally, constantly doing it over and over again, he felt reborn. He was a new self, not James the failed law student, or similarly, James the college dropout. He was James, utterly James.
He was very much caught up in his dancing that he hadn't noticed the figure in the doorway. A figure with a look on his face, so love struck and entranced, focused on every movement of James' body.
James, who was dancing mindlessly, went to turn around, when he saw what must have been a god in the door frame.
“Didn't know I had an audience,” James said, turning down the music from his phone.
The man, very pale with long dark hair, could have been mistaken for Sirius at first glance, but he was relatively shorter and had sharper facial features. He wore rings and some chains around his neck, not terribly styled for a white boy, or so James thought.
“You deserved one.” There was a very light french accent behind his words.
“Well, thank you,” James chuckled at that. He knew he deserved an audience, dancing with the intent of being watched was his literal job description. “No offense but what is a foreigner such as yourself doing in a bollywood studio building?”
The man smiled, “I’m a dancer. Ballet. Just landed and wanted to check out some of the dancers here before visiting my brother.”
Ballet, just landed, visiting his brother, french accent, pale, black hair, ok yea this was Sirius’ brother for sure. “Hate to break it to you, but the last ballet dancer in this studio left like a year ago”
“Well, I stumbled upon something much better than a ballet dancer, didn't I?” he smirked.
Was Sirius’ brother flirting with him? Not that James minded, but he should. Shouldn't he?
“Did you now?” James retorted. Wait, that was flirting. Was he flirting with Regulus Black? Because he shouldn't be, right? That was Sirius' little brother there. And James wasn't gay right? It's not like he dated much, but it had always been girls. But that didn't mean he couldn't find this man pretty. Right?
“Yep,” Regulus stepped closer, “because I got to see the James Potter in action.”
“You know who I am?” James choked out, somewhat in shock and also in awe of this boy's boldness.
“How could I not? Sirius doesn't shut up about his famous friend. So, I did my research.”
James just looked at Regulus for a moment, “Research? What kind of research?”
Regulus smiled, knowingly.
“Well, let’s just say I’ve gotten really into Bollywood recently”
James felt butterflies in his stomach in a way he didn't understand. Had Regulus watched his movies? Did he enjoy them? Was this technically still flirting? James felt like his head would spin off, but he just couldn't put words to it, or maybe he just didn't want to.
“Oh? And why is that?”
How was he still keeping his cool? He must be blushing intensely at this point right.
“Because I found this actor and dancer that I just adore. He reminds me a lot of you actually. Passionate, expressive, and if I dare say it, handsome.”
“You think I'm handsome?” James sputtered, there goes his cool guy image. He tried so hard to act normal, smooth. But something about Regulus just made James want to shut him up with a kiss. Wait. No. That's not right. That can't be right. Right?
Regulus chuckled, sending James plummeting into internal panic, “Yes, James, I think you’re very handsome”
“Regulus?” James asked
Regulus tilted his head ever so slightly “Yes, James?”
“I think you're pretty.”
It wasn't said in a flirty way. It was vulnerable, raw. Everything James thought he wasn't, was put into those words. It was beautiful, but he wouldn't realize that until later. At that moment it was terrifying.
James stood still, just standing there, almost sad looking. How did it get to this so quickly? But then Regulus, witty, flirty Regulus, walked towards him with such a beautiful calmness in his eyes.
“It’s ok, James,” he said, smoothly, effortlessly. It made James' heart feel seen. “What are you feeling?” Regulus asked, still calm. Still smooth.
“I'm scared.”
Regulus kept looking, waiting patiently for James to say more.
“I’ve never-” He tried. “I’m not-” He tried again. “I haven't-'' Another try failed.
James’ eyesight blurred with tears, tears he didn't want, not in front of him. But Regulus was patient, he just stood there next to James.
“I’ll be honest James, I don't know much about Indian culture, but what you're feeling, it's not necessarily welcomed with open arms, is it?”
James shook his head. He knew his parents wouldn't hate him for being… gay. But he couldn't be. He just couldn't. Not with his renown, not with his popularity rising.
“I can’t feel like this, Regulus, not towards you, not towards…” he paused.
“A guy?”
“Yea” he breathed, lightly.
Now he was scared he may be hurting Regulus, and that hurt James more, and that broke James.
“I probably look like an idiot,” James tried to laugh, but it just came out sad. “Crying because of a boy I-” he sniffled, “literally just met”
“You don’t look like an idiot James. This is a natural reaction to figuring out a piece like this about yourself”
“I'm sorry.”
Regulus looked puzzled, “Why?”
“You were probably just looking for a quick fuck and now here you are, having to comfort me through,” he paused, “this nonsense.”
“Oh, James.” He looked sad. “I was flirting with you because I liked you. Ever since I started watching your movies I couldn't keep my eyes off you. And with all the great things Sirius says, how could I not fall for you?”
James looked at him in awe which caused a small smile to form on Regulus’ lips.
“I just wanted to see how great you are in person, so I may have asked Sirius for your studio. And there you were. With your precision, your passion, your… I don't even know James. The way you dance, so perfectly, I wish I could have stayed there for eternity just watching you, because I like you.”
“I-” James was speechless, “I meant what I said, you're very pretty. I’m just not ready to accept… or to say that I'm…”
“I’m not asking for that, all I want is your trust. Trust that you’ll be okay. Trust that I’m not here to hurt you.”
There was a long few minutes of silence. At this point they had sat down, James resting his head on Regulus’ shoulder.
“Regulus?” James spoke, quiet, scared, but less so than before. He trusted Regulus with his calm eyes and soft words.
Regulus only hummed in response.
“Can you kiss me?”
Regulus had a soft look on his face, “Is that what you want?”
“Yes.”
Regulus let his hand rest on James' face. He gave one last look to James, who nodded, before having their lips meet.
Kissing Regulus was not different because he was a boy. Kissing Regulus was different because James felt safe. He had not felt any pressure. He didn't feel like he had to act a certain way to please Regulus. Something about Regulus made him feel like being James, that just James was enough.
When they separated James smiled softly, “You have my trust Regulus, all my trust.”