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“Gil, why are you so anxious?” Break’s voice was filled with concern on the crisp September evening.
Gil did his best to hide his nerves, but even while blind, Break was still observant as ever. The Raven took a deep breath through his nose to try to calm down his wired nerves. After all, they were on a stroll through the Rainsworth garden, which they have begun doing regularly in the last couple of months. To Break, this was a yet another ordinary walk, where they simply spent quality time together after their day of either doing a mission for Pandora, or filling out paperwork. This was their moment to ground themselves and indulge in each other’s company.
Of course, Gil was the one to suggest it as a reason for Break to sustain his health, as gentle walks were beneficial for both the mind and the body. Gil was more than adamant to always take Break under his arm and guide them through the twisting garden. Such became their routine, and they both looked forward to it during the day, especially on the days when they’d be separated for their missions.
For Gil, however, these walks were more special as he had a hidden reason behind why he suddenly decided to start dragging out his partner for daily strolls.
It’s been half a year since they officially became an item. Oz was the first to recognize the shift in the air between them and pointed it out rather bluntly at the dinner table one time. Both Gilbert and Xerxes choked on their drinks when the teen pointed between them with his fork casually, bursting the bubble. “Have you two slept with each other?”
The new couple wanted to give it a few days to figure out the logistics of their relationship, to see how it could affect their line of work and the statuses of their houses. However, the ridiculously observant blond just had to go and ruin their carefully crafted plan, making them both look like fish out of water, gasping for air and trying to come up with some reasonable excuse.
However, after seeing the blank stares around the dinner table from Sharon and Uncle Oscar, they accepted their defeat and gave in to the truth. Yes, they were interested in pursuing each other romantically. No, the details have not been worked out yet. But all that was in the past.
It’s been half a year now that they’ve been together, with everyone around them fully accepting of their relationship, and Gilbert even moved into the Rainsworth estate and shared Xerxes’ room with him.
It was a peaceful life. Borderline perfect even. That is, if it weren’t for the occasional blood stained pillow case or Break’s coat sleeves and handkerchiefs, which have been becoming more frequent in the last couple of months.
The first few weeks of the relationship, they’ve been so focused on each other, it’s been near impossible to tear away from simply reveling in one another. And so they indulged until the honeymoon phase was over, but not completely. Not like it could ever go away truly. Their love was not fragile, nor shallow. It was years of built up tension and trust that amounted to this, which could only have meant they belonged together. That much was evident.
With the days passing, Break’s health condition was not improving; not that it could. It was apparent that the contract with the Mad Hatter only had one outcome, and it was his demise. Break warned Gil of that much before they accepted this relationship, but the stubborn Nightray refused to budge, saying that they’d figure it out. Together.
While there was not much that Break could do on his end, he agreed to not go on missions recklessly, no thanks to Gilbert’s daily reminders that he awaited him back home every night. However, even with the minimal use of his Chain, Break’s body was still giving out bit by bit.
After a particularly bad coughing fit that left Break unconscious for almost twelve hours, Gil finally snapped. He had been researching any solution he could that would restore Break’s health to him and return his life to normal. He read through every record Pandora had on all sorts of healers and contractors with Chains that possess some form of medicinal abilities. None of them fitted the criteria of healing someone whose body was being worn down by the most powerful Chain in existence.
Sitting by the edge of Break’s bed, Gil was looking at the peacefully sleeping face of his lover who was once again in his little coma no one knew when he’d wake up from. Gil’s leg was bouncing up and down nervously, his hands wringing together anxiously. It’s already been past the twelve hour mark, and each time it seemed an extra hour was added to Break’s blackout.
He was itching for a cigarette to calm his mind, but any moment now his partner could awake, and he wanted to be there for him when that happened, no matter the time of day or night.
Gil looked at Break’s rising and falling chest and took a small form of comfort in that. ‘At least he’s still breathing…’ That was good. Still. It would be better if he’d stop wasting what little of his life he had in this unconscious state. It was maddening, but also motivating to try to find some solution to this. He still refused to believe that nothing in this world of Chains and time travel and with the existence of the Abyss, that nothing could be done to save this single human.
Gil laced his hands behind his head. He had to be missing something. There was simply no way that their story ended with Gil lowering Break’s casket into the ground and living out the rest of his days alone. Sure, there was a possibility he would meet someone else that would make him see the light again… But he simply refused to think about that. Not while his partner was still breathing.
His leg began to bounce again and his knuckles were about to go white from how firmly they were laced together, when a knock came by the door frame and a soft voice called to him. “Gilbert?”
The Raven whipped his head around to see Sharon standing in the doorway to the room. They’ve made it a point to leave the door open when Break was unconscious so anyone would be able to visit him, even though it was now their shared private room. There was no point in keeping the matter private when everyone was worried about the valuable member of the household.
“You’ve been sitting there for twelve hours now… Why don’t you go eat something?” Sharon asked gently, feeling Gil’s oozing anxiety seep into every corner of the room.
“No, but what if he wakes? It could be any minute now…” Gil’s excuse sounded weak even to his own ears. In truth, he knew it was likely to be in a couple, if not a few, hours.
Sharon tried to give him a reassuring smile and stepped inside the room to show her resolve. “I’ll watch over him for now. You go take a break. If he wakes, I’ll send Equis to find you and bring you here right away, alright?”
Begrudgingly, Gil nodded his head and stood up, his legs were a bit wobbly as his muscles were stiff from sitting down all day. There was nobody he trusted more to look after Break in his absence than Sharon. She was like a dear younger sister to him, and after looking out for her most of her life, Sharon felt like she owed her caretaker at least this much to watch over him while he was unconscious.
Gil walked slowly to the door, passing Sharon on his way, who just gently squeezed his arm when their paths crossed before she sat down and resumed Gil’s earlier vigil over Break. Gil looked over his shoulder one last time to make sure Break’s ruby eye didn’t open, but to his great disappointment, it remained closed, just like it was for the past twelve hours. He gave a defeated sigh, and instead of going to the kitchen like Sharon asked him, his feet took him to the study again.
Once inside, he closed the door behind him and let out a frustrated scream that he’d been holding in ever since Break collapsed earlier that morning. They were on their way to breakfast actually when Break just… fell. Luckily, Gil caught him before the Hatter could hit the floor, and carried him back to their bed where he still remained.
After a whole day of sitting tautly, Gil needed to release all the energy, and along with his throat numbing scream, he ended up punching the bookshelf he was standing next to. He wanted to aim for the wall, but he figured punching the stone wall would cause more harm than good, so he opted for the wooden bookshelf. Which, in hindsight, still hurt like an absolute motherfucker.
Amid his anger, he didn’t notice how a book had dislodged itself as the shelf shook with the impact. He was too focused on groaning in pain and shaking out his hand when he noticed the small leather bound book with no markings on it. No title, no author… Just a plain brown booklet.
Forgetting about the pain momentarily, Gil bent down to pick it up, curiosity overtaking his mind and dissipating the anger slowly. He thought he had read every single book in this study, but he’s never seen this one before. He opened it and flipped through the pages. It appeared to be a contact booklet with the names of individuals on one side, and their addresses on the other. However, there was also a middle column that had the Chains listed to what could only be the contractors names in the book. There was also a quick description of the Chains’ abilities scribbled next to their names.
Pandora had similar records, which held archives of their legal contracts, as well as any illegal contracts they either already eliminated or were tracking. However, Gil has never seen this list before. By the looks of it, these had to be illegal contractors, since anything legal was kept on record at Pandora. But why wasn’t this record in the headquarters? What was it doing here?
He didn’t recognize any of the names, so he looked to the addresses, which painted a clearer picture for him. These were all from the rich district. Flipping through, Gil’s mind raced. ‘These are all rich bastards that must have entered illegal contracts and paid for their contracts to remain silent so that Pandora wouldn’t hunt them down. Yet, somebody kept a record somehow…’
Gil raced over to his chair, clearing the table hastily with a single sweep of his arm and plopped down heavily to sift through this new list he has never seen before. A fire ignited within him momentarily. ‘What if this is what I was missing all along!’
His eyes immediately began skimming over the Chains and their descriptions, since the other two columns were relatively useless for now… ‘Something that could heal… Or give life… Or return life… Or restore health…’ He kept running through any combination of abilities that could be of use in his predicament.
However, with this being a list for rich contractors, of course most of the Chains dealt with riches and fame. ‘Fools… fools! All of them!’ Gilbert’s mind screamed. How could someone be so focused on their social status when they could be dealing with more important matters such as healing a loved one?
Eventually, he came across a Chain simply labeled as ‘Ren- equal exchange’. He placed an index finger as a placeholder to come back to that one, as that was the only thing that looked somewhat promising then. Still, he continued flipping through the rest of the pages, but as expected, there was nothing useful to his purpose.
With his heart hammering in his chest, he read over the simple name of the Chain and kept rereading the words ‘equal exchange’. Perhaps this was his solution right there. Offer something of equal value in exchange for Break’s health. But what could that be? Where would he find something like that?
There was no time to think. After glancing one last time at the address in the last column, Gil was already out the door and on his way to the nobleman’s house. Augustus Arthur.
On his way there, his mind raced with every possibility of what the short description could mean, but also, what could he say to convince Augustus to let him use his Chain to do his bidding. Naturally, if it was an illegal contract, if he was to use it, it would bring him closer to his end, so anyone would refuse to use their Chain for purposes other than their own. Especially a stuck up rich person.
A sudden memory intruded his thoughts, of a late night by the fireplace after a particularly long and tiresome mission with Pandora. Him and Break were simply curled up on the couch. Break’s knees were drawn up and resting over Gil’s lap while the other held him close by the shoulder with one arm, the other hand gently stroking the white locks. Not many words were exchanged that evening as far as their usual chatter went. It was a simple, “long day?” followed by a tired, “yeah…”, and that’s all they needed to understand each other and to assume the position in front of the warm fire.
Break eventually fell asleep in his arms, after which Gil had to adjust his own position to lay down, taking Break down on top of him and they both slept like that for the rest of the night.
That was a good memory of the peaceful life they could have, one Gil desperately yearned for, if it wasn’t for the constant reminder of a ticking clock pulling that future further away from him.
Golden eyes lit with determination, Gil stalked up the front steps of the mansion of that nobleman. Morals be damned. He didn’t care what methods he’d have to use to get the man to use his Chain for his needs. If this Chain had the slightest capability of giving him what he needed, he'd take it. No matter the cost.
He knocked on the door forcefully. After a few moments a maid opened the door and asked him to identify his business at their estate.
Gil made up the lie on the spot that he was a Pandora agent and needed to speak with Ausutus Arthur. In hindsight, not exactly a lie. He could, and probably should make a fuss at Pandora about why all these rich contractors were allowed to roam free, but that was far down on his priority list. His mentor has done well to teach him all about priorities, and right now, he knew what he came for.
A fit blond middle aged man with rimmed glasses showed up at the door after the maid departed to fetch him. He looked displeased, spreading his arms in exasperation. “What is this about? I thought we had a deal?”
Gil bit his tongue since he didn’t exactly know what went on with that list of illegal contractors. Still, he had to appear somewhat authoritative to get the man to admit to owning the Chain, and then find out how to use it. “I’m from Pandora, I’m here about your Chain.”
“I know who you are. What do you want? We had an agreement. Nobody knows about Ren outside of those who gave me the contract. What’s the deal now?”
“I just wish to gather more information on its abilities. Our records are rather vague.”
Augustus’s eyes narrowed in suspicion. He knew he didn’t owe Pandora anything anymore. What was done, was done, and he was let go to live out the rest of his life as he saw fit. “As if I’d share that sort of information with you…” He spat.
Nerves snapping for the second time that night, Gil pulled out his gun and aimed it down the blond’s nose. “What about now? Make a sound of distress and the first bullet will go into your right knee cap. Maybe then I’d get to see this ‘equal exchange’ in action. Where would your Chain pull out another kneecap for you from? Hm?”
The man lifted up his hands in self defence immediately, taking a cautious step back, eyes wide on the tip of the barrel. “Easy, boy…”
“Now. About that Chain…” Gil’s resolve didn’t falter. He’s done worse things in his life than threaten a nobleman. Back then, it was all in the name of saving Oz. Now it was for Break. The difference was, his devotion to his lover far exceeded anything he has ever felt towards Oz. Especially now that he was older with a more firm head on his shoulders.
He took a step forward to enter the house and closed the door behind him. Augustus gulped and tilted his head in an indication for Gil to follow him, slowly lowering his arms. Gil lowered his gun as well, but kept it in his hand, looking around quickly to make sure none of the servants saw him threaten their master. He could conceal it in his coat at any given moment if needed.
Still, the man led him in silence to something that appeared like a study and closed the door behind them. Gil didn’t drop his guard one bit, hand tightening around the weapon just in case.
When Augustus turned around and saw Gil’s tense body, he gave an audible sigh. “Relax. Let’s just get this over with. What do you wish to know?”
Gil’s eyes didn’t leave the blond man as he walked by and went to sit in his chair behind the desk. “Your Chain. How does it work exactly?”
Another heavy sigh left the older man, clearly not happy to be interrogated, but still better than having a kneecap blown out. “Ren operates on the laws of equal exchange. You ask for something, but he has to use something of equal value to make it work. For example, I ask for money, but he can’t just conjure money out of nowhere. So he takes money from where it already exists and transfers it over to me. However, there's always a catch.”
Gil took a moment to process that information, gears turning very quickly in his mind. “What about something less tangible like health?”
“Health?” Augustus looked perplexed. “What do you need health for? You’re young and fit.”
“It’s not for me!” Gil’s voice rose but quickly tapered off, realizing he’s getting riled up, his gaze flicked away to not divulge too much of what was going on inside his soul, which, at that moment, was just turmoil.
Augustus leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms, drawing his brows in suspicion. “Something tells me you’re not here just for information.”
Gil met the accusation head on, squaring his shoulders in defiance. “You’re right. I came here to ask to use your Chain.”
Augustus shook his head, leaning forward. “No way in hell. You know what happens every time I use my Chain.”
Expecting as much, Gil crossed over to the desk to slam his fist on it and once again pointed his gun at the nobleman. “Then I’m not here to ask you, I’m here to tell you that I will use your Chain! Bring it out!”
Angry tears sprung to his eyes. With each second passing his partner was teetering between life and death and this stupid excuse for a human refused to give up a shred of his dignity. The man made a contract with the devil and was doomed anyway. What was one more drop in the bucket?
Augustus wanted to call Gil’s bluff. The raven haired man might act all high and mighty with a gun in his hand, but he wouldn’t actually kill him, since he made it clear he was there for his Chain’s services. He leered, pushing his luck. “No.”
Anger clouding his judgement, Gil let out a frustrated growl and pistol whipped the man across the side of his jaw, sending the blond almost flying out of his chair.
Clearly not expecting the younger man to be serious with his threats, Augustus howled. “Son of a--!!”
“Bring him out!!!” Gil shouted again, furry burning in his eyes as he advanced on the man from around the desk to tower over him. Torture was not above him if it had to come down to that.
Augustus tried a different approach to try to dissuade the young man from pursuing his Chain. “You don’t understand… what you might need to give up… to get what you want…” He panted while trying to straighten out his jaw.
“I don’t care!” Gil growled menacingly. “Bring him out.”
Augustus looked hard into those unyielding golden eyes, not seeing any room to wiggle out of this one. The boy was surely determined… That much was evident. He only held out some hope that his guest wouldn’t like the terms his Chain presented and would back down and not use his services. After all, Ren was a sly beast and often presented deals that even Augustus had to turn down.
With a sigh of defeat, Augustus closed his eyes. “Alright… but don’t blame me if you don’t like what he asks of you…”
Gil leaned away, heart flipping momentarily at the victory. He watched as the Chain manifested itself next to Augustus. It was a fox looking creature with matted fur that didn’t look fully orange as one would expect from the animal. Gil understood the source of the name instantly, Ren, or Renard in full, and also why Augustus warned him about the coyness of the creature. Foxes were known to be sly indeed. However, that did not make Gil hesitate in his actions one bit.
The appearance of the creature was accompanied by a maniacal cackle as the fox took great joy at the events that unfolded prior to his appearance. “Ku-ku-ku… It didn’t take him long to persuade you, Augustus… I was truly curious if you’d let me come out to play or not…”
The voice of the beast was melodic, juxtaposing his mocking words. Augustus growled in annoyance. “Shut up, you fox. Present your terms to this man and be done with it.”
The fox cackled again and shook its head in amusement. It got up and went to sit in front of Gilbert, who looked down at the beast with a slightly aghast expression. So this was what he was dealing with. His hand tightened on his gun instinctively as it often did in the presence of foreign Chains. The fox presented no malice in its attitude, clearly bound by his contract to execute only that which was asked of him.
“How may I be of service to you?” It bowed its head slightly in polite greeting.
“I…” Gil suddenly was having a hard time finding his voice. After so many months of looking, the solution was finally sitting in front of him. His mind still hasn’t caught up with his heart. “I wish to restore the health and life force of another individual…”
Augustus scoffed in the back, to which Gil threw him a nasty glare. The man averted his eyes immediately, pretending like he didn’t make a sound. Ren continued matter of factly. “And what might you be willing to give up in return?”
“Anything.” Gil answered without hesitation.
“A life force is no easy matter to deal with. I need to gather it from an already existing source in order to transfer it over to something else. You understand that, don’t you?”
“Yes.”
The fox tilted its head curiously. “Say. This individual… Are they dear to you?”
“Very.” Gil’s heart hammered. ‘Just get to the point already!’
“Then, how about this…” Ren jumped up on the desk swiftly and trotted over to the rose plant sitting on the corner. He took one of the rose hips in his teeth and snapped it off, returning with it to set it down in front of Gil on the desk. “I can infuse this rose hip with life energy for your dear.”
“How will you do that?” Gil asked, throat dry, barely managing to keep his voice from cracking at the anticipation of the moment.
“Why by taking your own life force, of course!” The fox beamed, glee in his voice and a mischievous twinkle in his eyes.
“You bastard!” Augustus spat, slamming his palm on the armrest and leaning forward. “What did I tell you! Don’t accept this deal!”
However, Gil’s mind was already racing. Of course, why didn’t he think of that…? He did say he was willing to do anything. Eyes blank, he looked up at the fox for confirmation, ignoring Augustuse’s outburst. “So… to save Break… I’d need to give up my life…?”
The fox shook its head, cackling again, finding the humans’ reactions around him rather amusing. “No, no, not all of it, I’m not that cruel.” He looked up at Gil and drew up its hackles in a twisted form of a smile. “Only half.” He stated simply, as if they were negotiating how much sugar to put in their tea and not how much life to give away.
“Half?” Gil blinked in confusion. He already accepted the terms of his death, so it was a wonder to receive this much lesser sentence.
Augustus grunted helplessly, not liking the hope that had begun slowly returning to Gil’s eyes.
“Yes, half. Half of your health will go to your beloved, and the other half will remain with you, so you can live half of your life together in good health. How does that sound?” Ren asked in a sing-songy voice.
“Sounds to me like a waste of time…” Augustus mumbled audibly enough, intentionally trying to offset Gil.
However, for Gil, this was a no brainer. “I’ll do it!”
At the same time as Ren cheered, “splendid!” Augustus howled, “no!”
Ren picked up the rose hip in his teeth and brought it over to Gil’s hand, nuzzling with his snout to indicate to the human to accept the item. “Hold the rose hip while I work the magic.”
Gil stood astounded, both heart and mind racing a thousand miles per hour, a whole range of emotions flooding through him in that moment. This was really happening. He finally found a cure; a solution to their problems. Break wouldn’t have to suffer, and they could live out the rest of their days in peace. However many days that might be. Luckily, since he was a Baskerville, a longer life span was in his cards, so that could mean anything in their case. Not a fact he was willing to divulge with the Chain or its contractor, though.
Ren tilted his head down and pressed his forehead against the hand holding the rose hip, eyes closed in concentration.
Gil didn’t feel anything, but once Augustus suddenly clutched his chest in pain, he understood that Ren’s end of the deal was done. His mind was far from being concerned for the other human in the room.
He opened his palm to see that nothing had changed with the hip. He looked to the Chain for some further direction, only sparing the contractor a cursory glance before focusing back on the task at hand. “So, how does it work? Do I just give this to him, or…?”
Ren once again cackled that maddening sound and shook his head. “No, my dear boy. This is a rose hip. The seeds inside need to be planted, and grown until the rose blooms.”
“Until the rose blooms?!” Gil yelped, expecting this to be an immediate solution, not a whole botanical endeavour. “How long does that usually take?!” He didn’t even know the first thing about gardening!
“About 60 days,” the fox stated matter of factly again, thoroughly amused by the yet again exasperated reaction.
“You…” Gil growled, hand tightening into a fist as he took in a shaky breath, trying to control his breathing.
Augustus wasn’t helping with his own form of vengeful laughter once he had recovered post his contract hand moving on his chest. He did warn the young lad, and he still refused to listen to him. So be it. Now he reaped the consequences. What a fool.
Gil forced his hand to relax so he wouldn’t damage the seeds by accident in his fury. Did Break even have 60 days left in his own life span? His mind flashed to the still but breathing form laying on their bed back at the estate. He must… He will do everything in his power to make him hold out for that long.
With a forced calm returning to his voice, he asked. “What else do I need to do?”
Ren observed curiously the exchange between Augustus and Gil’s recomposure. “On the 60th day, when the first rays of a full moon infuse the flower with its light, your dear shall inhale the fragrance of the rose and restore their health.”
“Full moon…?” Gil asked, despair creeping into his voice. How long would he have to wait for all these conditions to align…?
Ren laughed cynically again, beyond amused at seeing the young human go through a whole array of emotions just from his own toying with him. “Worry not, today is your lucky day, as this day is exactly 60 days away from a full moon. If you hurry home now and plant the seeds, the flower will be ready in time for the full moon. “
Gil’s breath hitched in his throat. Wild eyes bright with hope and determination, he quickly looked between the fox and Augustus and swiftly turned around on his heel and bolted out of the room, not saying a thank you or a goodbye. He had a time sensitive task to get to.
---
“Bye-bye…” Ren mewled cheekily once Gil was gone.
“You’re such a bastard,” Augustus growled and threw his Chain a death glare.
The fox met it head on, not afraid in the slightest. “Oh, come on, you have to admit. That was fun!”
“Not another word from you…” Augustus fumed, making the Chain disappear.
---
After Gil planted the seeds with what little botanical knowledge he had, he made his way back to their room. He leaned against the door heavily, exhausted from the whole encounter and his run back to the estate. He saw that Sharon was reading a book by the candlelight, while Break still looked undisturbed from where he left him. Heart clenched, he made his way into the room.
“Gilbert! You’re back!” Sharon exclaimed, slightly startled by Gil’s presence. She looked him up and down, a crease of worry forming between her eyebrows. “Are you alright? Why are your hands dirty…?”
Gil looked at his soiled hands and tried to hide them, not wanting to share any of what transpired today. Not until he knew for sure that the plan was going to work. The countdown has begun. Now all he had to do was remain patient, and do whatever he could to keep Break alive until then. “Nothing, I just, uh…”
Luckily, in that moment, Break stirred with a soft moan, which spared Gil any unneeded further interrogation. He rushed over to Break’s side, immediately forgetting about Sharon’s presence. He dropped down onto the bed and scooped the frail man into his arms, leaning over him to hug him tightly to his chest. “Break!”
Immense relief washed over him that he got there just in time to actually be there when his partner woke. Especially after the earlier ordeal he went through with Augustus and Ren. He was beyond exhausted, but seeing Break awake rushed a new wave of energy back to him.
He let out a choked laugh when he felt Break’s thin arms slither around him as well, and he felt Break inhale his scent. “Gil…”
The Raven tightened his hold, beyond happy to hear his lover’s voice again and to feel his arms around him, even if they were still weak from his little coma.
Sharon watched the reunion with a soft smile, her hand clutched at her heart. She wished to come to Break’s side as well and give him her embrace, but seeing how happy the pair was in each other’s arms, she decided against it. Let them have this moment.
“Is it time for breakfast yet?” Break asked, the memories slowly returning to him, that he and Gil were actually on their way to breakfast that morning before he blacked out.
Gil actually laughed and pulled away to look into Break’s ruby eye, a childish smile plastered on his face, while Break also looked semi amused. So typical of him, playing off his little episodes as if they were nothing. But in that moment, Gil didn’t care. He had hope now. Real hope. Not just a story in his head. That hope was now planted in the garden, ready to be harvested in two months' time.
Despite it being nearly midnight, Gil grabbed Break’s hand excitedly. “Sure, let’s go get some breakfast.”
That was two months ago. Two full months of doting over Break like never before. Of course, the older was a tad confused at first at all this sudden attention from his partner. Not that Gilbert didn’t care for him before… However, ever since that episode, things were slightly different. Gil took charge of his diet and exercise, making sure he was keeping up with both. Any time Break would groan and moan that he didn’t want to do any of that, Gil would just repeat that it was for his health.
Reluctantly, and doing it more for Gil than himself, Break complied, (after some arguing and bickering, but nonetheless, complied).
Gil didn’t want to share anything of what happened with Ren with anyone, even Break. He didn’t want to get the other’s hopes up, in case the fox tricked him or something happened with the rose during its growth.
Gil began pulling Break out to the garden more, which wasn’t an unpleasant place to spend time. Even though Break couldn’t see the flowers that were surely blooming beautifully, he could very well smell them and run his fingertips along them to feel the texture and imagine what they’d look like. Gil would do his best to describe the colours, and with all those tidbits combined, he felt as if nothing was wrong with him; like he was truly alive and well while he was beside Gil in that garden.
For Gil, as much as he enjoyed their newfound trips outdoors, it was also an excuse to check in on the rose bush to see how it was making out. To his great relief, everything appeared to be going well. He has been studying up on some botanical knowledge to aid the process of the growth of the flower, and so far, everything looked according to the pictures and diagrams in the books. Those 60 days could not come sooner.
The garden was generally associated with good moments, both intimate and spiritual, where they simply got to be themselves with each other. The amount of kissing and caressing they’ve done in pretty much every corner of it, sometimes hiding their acts from the servants like a couple of teenagers, and other times getting completely carried away and not caring who saw.
That’s why Break found it rather troubling that the younger was oozing anxiousness on that particular evening, which to him, seemed like any other day they spent together there. He rubbed Gil’s knuckles reassuredly, patiently waiting for an answer once Gil finished taking his steadying breath. His thumb absently rubbed against the ring on Gil’s finger. Their promise rings to each other, which he also wore on his hand.
They wanted to mark their relationship somehow, but since Break was adamant on not marrying Gil, wedding rings were out of the question, so they settled for promise rings. Not that Break didn’t want to marry Gil. He just didn’t want to leave him widowed, as he felt he surely would within the year.
Of course, his condition did not improve, but Gil remained by his side. It sometimes felt like he was still alive by Gil’s sheer willpower alone. The stubborn Raven did everything in his power to upkeep Break’s health, even if the efforts were futile in the end. He kept getting weaker with each day, but Gil kept holding onto him.
Break had to push certain thoughts out of his head. How Gil’s efforts would be better spent elsewhere. With a partner who wasn’t dying, dedicating all his time and devotion to someone who wouldn’t leave him. But each day the younger proved that he was there to stay, and Break, selfishly, let him, because he, too, found this life much more bearable with Gil by his side.
On this evening particularly, he was walking slower than usual, with Gil practically having to drag him behind him. Still, he refused to give up and forced his feet to carry on, step after step, but to what end… He did not know. He only knew that it would make his partner happy, and that’s all that mattered.
Instead of answering his question on what was troubling him, Gil, after his long inhale, simply said. “Come on, not much further…”
Break looked up with his unseeing eye. “Not much further where, Gil?” It appeared they were on their usual route through the garden, but they never had a destination in mind, only aimless wandering to get a bit of exercise and fresh air.
Gil looked worriedly between his tired lover and the evening sky. The sun has only recently set, but the moon was not out yet. He wanted to growl in frustration but kept his emotions in check, redirecting that anger towards focusing on holding onto Break. The stupid full moon could not come out sooner. Maybe by the time they got there, it would be out. He decided to entertain Break’s question. “I got you a little gift…” He admitted, never having it within him to outright lie, but keeping this a secret has been brutal for him over the past two months.
“A gift? For someone like me?” Break chuckled, leaving out the part that implied ‘for a dying man’, as that joke was no longer funny the closer his end actually drew near.
“Yes. I think… I hope… you’ll like it a lot.” Gil strung together a sentence, doing his best not to divulge too much. His heart clenched in his chest at just how much he was hoping it would work and the last two months weren’t a waste of time. Even if the plan was to fail for some ungodly reason, Gil did not regret a single moment of how he spent it with his partner.
Each day was dedicated to each other, lifting each other up and never letting anything get in between them. Even when Break would try to bring up his demise and how Gil should move on and be happy, Gil would immediately shut down the conversation and find other ways to shut Break up in general to prove that he wasn’t going anywhere.
Break snuggled up to Gil, hugging his arm tighter with a content sigh trying to sound like his usual cheeky self. “As long as it’s from you, I’m sure I’ll love it…”
Gil glanced down at the white head clinging onto his arm and smiled softly. ‘If only he knew…’ He planted a kiss at the top of that head, causing Break to rub his face against his sleeve more.
Finally, they reached the rose bush, which, by then, had produced a single flower, and now stood in full bloom, a rich red contrasting with the dark green leaves behind. Seeing it set Gil’s heart to fluttering. “Here we are…” He said shakily, drawing Break closer to the plant. Now all that was left was for the full moon light to work its last piece of the puzzle, and everything would be set.
“And where are we exactly?” Break asked, not feeling as if they were any place new or extraordinary.
“We’re… Standing in front of a rose bush… that I planted… And I wanted to gift it to you. It’s finally in full bloom, that’s why I wanted to bring you here tonight…” Gil stumbled over his words, heart beginning to thunder in his chest once he saw the moon creeping up on the horizon.
Break gasped in awe, fingertips flying up to cover his mouth. “Gil! That is… so considerate of you…!” He whipped his head about searching for where the smell was the strongest. “Where is it?”
Gil took Break’s hand gently and navigated him towards the flower. Once close enough, Break was able to sense the bush and a waft of the aroma hit his nose. He smiled and leaned in, following the scent until his nose was mere inches away from the petals.
Gil’s heart almost stopped in his chest at the perfection of the moment. Just as Break leaned into the flower, the white rays of the moon bathed the side of his face in its glow, both him, and the rose. They were both illuminated by the silver hue, with Break’s already pale face smiling at the sheer simplicity of stopping to smell a rose flower. Of course for him, the moment was special because he was witnessing a rose that his lover planted for him, but for Gil, it was much much more.
He held his breath, anticipation electrifying his body, his heart beat so loud in his chest he was sure Break was hearing it too. His eyes stayed glued open though, not wanting to miss a moment of what happened next. Truth was, he didn’t know what would happen next. Would the effect be instantaneous? Would Break feel anything? Would he finally feel something? Unfortunately, he was once again at the mercy of waiting.
Once done inhaling the rose that smelled oh so perfect, Break turned towards Gil. “I love it, Gil!” He smiled warmly and tilted his head to the side sweetly. Then he stepped closer to his partner and enveloped his hands around the Raven. He could feel how tense Gil’s body was, but he attributed the tension and anxiety towards Gil simply expecting his reaction. He was hoping his words of encouragement and body language would ease the younger’s concerns. It was a wonderful gift, his partner had nothing to worry about… And yet…
Gil wrapped his arms around the thin form and held on as tightly as he could without hurting the older. ‘Come on, come on, come on!!!’ His mind screamed for any indication that the magic worked, that Break would be okay and that this wasn’t one of their last hugs ever. He felt his body beginning to tremble as it tried to contain the tsunami of emotions overwhelming him. So much anticipation and tension has built up inside him.
He was so happy that Break was pleasantly surprised by the gift, but he was also so angry that he was not seeing immediate results. Every second passing felt like an eternity as he held Break in his arms, fighting back a scream and instead transferring his anger into this tight embrace.
Feeling the younger begin to lightly quake in his arms, Break had to pull away. It wasn’t the first time that he held the Raven in his arms while the other cried, so he was very familiar with the symptoms. He held the younger at arm’s length, concern returning to his voice. “Gil, what’s wrong…?”
His question trailed off though as he felt himself squinting. ‘Squinting…? I haven’t done that in months… What’s going on…?’
For the first time in a long while since he began living in perpetual darkness, Break saw traces of light creeping into the sides of his vision. Even that bit made him flinch and close his eye slightly. He let go of Gil in favour of rubbing his eye, hissing lightly. Was he finally losing it?
“Break…?” Now it was Gil’s concerned voice that filled the night air. He reached for Break’s arm, not sure why the older appeared in pain suddenly. He wished health and well-being upon his partner, not more pain and misery…
Break dropped his hand to look up at Gil and blinked rapidly. Slowly, more light was filtering into his retina, and after a few silent and very confused moments, Gil’s silhouette began coming into view. Break frowned in confusion, eye narrowing as more and more of Gil’s moonlit features began taking shape, and eventually, he could see every detail down to the last strand of Gil’s messy hair.
Gil watched Break’s face contort from pain into confusion, holding his breath through the whole ordeal, until finally, something seemed to change in Break’s eye. He was no longer only reacting internally to something, but rather, he seemed to be receiving external stimuli as his eye, which has been unfocused for so many months, suddenly zoned in on him. Still, he dared not say anything before he had the confirmation he needed from Break himself.
Absolutely unable to believe it and wanting to make sure that he didn’t die after smelling the rose and hugging Gil, Break had to get some proof that he was still alive, and that this wasn’t what heaven looked like. Although, it wouldn’t be so bad if it was…
“Gil…?” Break’s eye moved over every feature of the man who has become so close and dear to him over the past few months. He stepped closer, hand going out to grasp Gil’s black sleeve, needing to feel that he was real and that his mind wasn’t just playing tricks on him.
Surely enough, Gil’s strong arm was as sturdy as ever, doing its best to return its hold on him too. Break looked down to make sure that it was still his hand that was holding Gil and not some imposter’s. Truly enough, it was his white sleeve and his thin hand that was gripping Gil’s black coat.
His gaze travelled up the arm, mouth hanging open in pure shock as his eye once again landed on Gil’s perfect features. He could tell there was a storm of emotions behind Gil’s golden eyes. His mind itself was still lagging a few paces behind reality as he could do nothing but stare, eye flicking between Gil’s, trying desperately to understand… “How…?” But his mind couldn’t even finish that question.
Gil wouldn’t have let him either, because as soon as Break’s question pierced the night air, he let go of any semblance of control, and simply allowed the emotions to burst forth. He cried out. “BREAK!” And enveloped the older into a tight embrace, the tears spilling over finally after being held in check for the last few minutes. Break could finally see him. And the confused look and all other indicators of visual sensory input evident in Break’s eye were all the confirmation he needed that his plan worked.
He didn’t know which emotion to hold onto in that moment: joy, excitement, delight, relief… they were all flooding inside him as he simply wept in happiness, holding Break as close as he could to him, finally certain that the other man wasn’t going anywhere.
Break was still recovering from his own shock, but seeing Gil so overwhelmed with joy gave his brain a slight kick into action. He too, wrapped his arms around the younger, finding that he had more strength than moments earlier to reciprocate the hug his partner was giving him. A choked laugh burst forth from him as he simply held onto Gil, not daring to close his eye on this moment, afraid that in doing so, the spell would be broken.
He took in the garden floor, the plants all around them, the bushes, and the rocks, soaking in every detail, until his eye finally landed on the rose. He didn’t know how, but he suspected that was the culprit behind this miracle.
Tears welled up in his own eye as he held Gil’s shaking form in his arms, head resting on his shoulder, his mind racing a thousand miles per hour. He didn’t know which thought to hang onto amid all the flying ones, mixed with so much emotion behind each one.
He was able to discern a few comprehensible words that Gil was mumbling through his sobs. “You’re alright… Gosh, Break… You’re finally alright… I can’t believe this…” Another wail burst forward, followed by more tears.
Break smiled and tightened his hold on the Raven but pulled away shortly after, holding onto Gil’s shoulders. He just had to see his partner. Enough with staring at the ground and the garden around them.
Gil truly looked like a hot mess, reminiscent of how he looked as a teen when he cried for Oz. Realizing that Break was looking at him, (and actually finally seeing him), Gil sniffled and tried to wipe his running nose and tears.
Watching this young adult lose all his usual composure brought a smile to Break’s face, and he reached inside his jacket for the handkerchief he always carried with him in case he started coughing up blood. Now it seemed Gil needed it more than him.
He brought up the cloth to dab at Gil’s tear stricken cheeks and the corners of his eyes. Gil smiled at the gesture, bringing a hand up to caress Break’s arm, and he leaned in to Break’s ministrations. How ironic that after so many months of him taking care of his partner, their roles were reversed in that moment.
Break himself was overwhelmed with joy at finally being able to see what he was doing and not relying on his intuition and other senses to figure out where Gil’s features were. He worked diligently on cleaning Gil’s face of his tears, his own tears already drying on his face as he focused on his task. Still, amid all his jumbled thoughts, one kept surfacing above all else.
“Gil… How…?” He looked up at the puffy golden eyes, finishing with his work and simply clenching the handkerchief worriedly in his hand.
He was wise enough to understand that nothing came free in this world, and for such a huge miracle to happen, Gil must have had to pay a hefty price. Break’s heart contorted at the thought of finding out what Gil had to give up for him. To his surprise though, Gil let out a choked chuckle, lifting up his shoulders in a shrug. “I just asked nicely…”
No way in hell was he going to ruin this perfect moment by walking Break through all the hassle he went through with Ren and the last two months. He’ll tell him eventually, as he was sure the older would keep nagging him. In truth, Break deserved to know the truth… Just… Not right now. Not in this gleeful reunion where it felt like they were both alive again. Even Gil felt a flood of energy coursing through him at the mere thought of what all this meant for them.
They were finally whole. They could be together, for their forever. They could finally live, and not merely survive each day. No more ‘what if’s’ or ‘when I’m gone’s, or praying and hoping Break would open his eye after every blackout. They could finally be a true couple.
Break saw something flicker behind Gil’s eyes, but hearing the simple response, decided not to push it for the night. The Raven was wise in not wanting to discuss the matter then as that was a true moment of celebration and happiness. Deciding to mark it as such, Break stepped closer so his body was flush with the younger, bringing his arms to drape around the Raven’s neck and connecting their mouths. For that, he would need to close his eye, but instead, he focused on how his body felt rejuvenated, the kiss feeling different on a more fundamental level.
Instantly, Gil’s arms wrapped around Break’s lower back, pulling his lover closer, finally feeling some strength behind the kiss. Over the last couple of weeks they had to be careful with their intimacy lest it would wear Break out completely. Now, he felt Break pushing against him with much force and life, putting everything into this affectionate gesture. Oh how Gil missed that.
His heart fluttered at the thought, opening his mouth hungrily to accept the lips pushing against his own. He did his best to show restraint not to devour the man before him right then in the garden, and instead, transferring that energy into a happy moan that reverberated through both of them.
Break, too, couldn’t believe the strength with which he was able to finally kiss Gilbert. He has wanted to show his partner for so long what he truly meant to him, but with each kiss growing weaker, that possibility seemed further out of reach. Now, miraculously, his wish could be realized as he returned Gil’s embrace, fully losing himself in the moment.
He took every opportunity to focus on how his body was feeling, stronger by the second, more firm, with such energy coursing through him that he hasn’t felt in months, if not years, since the moment his contract began taking its toll on him.
Best of all, he enjoyed how Gil’s lips felt on his, how he was finally able to appreciate them for what they were, and finally able to reciprocate their strength and comfort. He wagered that kissing a dying man was not all that hot for his partner, but now he would be able to witness him in all his glory. The thought intrigued him and brought a smile to his face, despite the kiss.
Feeling Break’s lips curl up, Gil also smiled into the kiss, pressing more firmly before leaning away to gawk in awe at his partner who was practically vibrating full of life and energy before him. Break had a twinkle in his eye and was smiling the sweetest of smiles, finally showing true happiness he has never seen before.
A bubbling laugh built up inside Gil and he let it out, unable to contain himself. Break joined him in his rejoice and soon they were both laughing foolishly, holding onto each other, unable to look away from one another. Gil looking at Break with awe and amazement as a literal miracle was standing before him, and Break looking at Gil with warm affection and adoration as the younger was surely the reason why he was alive and well right then.
They ended up simply standing there, staring at each other, holding hands, with the moonlight illuminating their features. Gil was absently rubbing Break’s ring on his finger as he often did when he was lost in thought. Now their promise rings could actually serve their purpose.
Break glanced down, following Gil’s thumb movements, and his own hand followed suit in mimicking Gil’s action. His heart swelled with joy at the implication of what this renewed life could mean, not only for him, but for them.
He looked up at his partner, a new wave of tears threatening to spill over as he simply nodded his head enthusiastically, a broad grin on his face.
Gil’s mouth dropped open in shock. Did he… did he finally receive a ‘yes!’ from Break? The night was filled with more miracles than he anticipated!
Unable to contain his excitement, with a joyous laugh, Gil lifted Break up and spun him around, hanging on tightly onto the one he could now call his lifelong partner. Sure, he might have always been bad with the ladies, and any prospects of marriage terrified him to the point of needing cruel ploys to get out of those, but with Break, everything just seemed right, like it truly made sense, and he didn’t have a single doubt in his mind about them.
Break also cheered in joy as he was spun around, head thrown back to simply take in this pleasure of being held by his loved one. Once on the ground, a plan began formulating in his mind, happy to finally be able to return to his cheerful self as he felt the rush of energy in his veins.
He took a step back, extending his arms out since he was still hanging onto Gil’s hands, seductively lowering his head to look at Gil from under his eyelash. “I’ll race you to the bedroom?” And without waiting for a response, since he very well knew the answer, he dropped their hands and was off in the direction of the manor, putting his newfound strength to the test.
Gil’s mind swam, overjoyed with seeing Break back to his usual coy self, but now with the addition of a rejuvenated form of flirtiness he hasn’t seen before. He laughed as he watched the white form run off, his coat unfurling behind him. He was about to follow, but wanted to look back at the reason all this was happening in the first place.
He gave the rose a final glance, eternally grateful for its service, and ran off after his lover, leaving the rose to continue growing in the garden as a reminder of their newfound life together.