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While Ezreal would rather be all sunshine and rainbows twenty-four-seven, he has to admit there were times he couldn’t believe he managed to pull you.
You were invited to dinner with Heartsteel which was actually a common occurrence but what made him realize that fact all the more today than any other day was the moment he saw the potential of you and Kayn. The chemistry was undeniable, Ezreal was even sure even a blind person could have seen how it might work between you two. Of course, he’d never admit this to your or Kayn’s face(he’d prefer not being teased by the latter, thank you very much) but seeing that in a new perspective now reawakened the green claws that used to tear at his inner being, the familiar dread of being second choice.
He doesn’t want to keep you bound so tight to him, he really doesn’t. You, the ever free little songbird that flew towards his vicinity one day to enchant him(despite him pressing that he’s done all the enchanting between you two) with the sweetest melody that had him hooked from the start. He isn’t surprised either that he’s not the only one who gets to hear your singing, but it stings now with the epiphany of his rivals being closer than he previously thought.
He doesn’t want to blame Kayn, either. While, yes, the little shit was probably provoking him(and Ezreal could bet money on it, too) sometimes but this wasn’t one of those moments and Ezreal knew that because there were tell-tale signs whenever the guitarist would piss him off: the totally not subtle glances his way whenever he’s got a devious plan on the works, the fits of giggles that would slip through every now and then before it bursts into a loud cackle once either he or Rhaast have gotten their fill of entertainment for the day, and even just the sheer smug tone in Kayn’s voice was enough to make Ezreal fold and either snitch to Yone(although that would only be Ezreal’s go-to if he wasn’t in for a beating himself) or whine enough to get your undivided attention, but this time he’s completely frozen.
Kayn wouldn’t genuinely steal you. This is a fact Ezreal is certain of, yet there was the open chance of you leaving him for Kayn so that would mean he technically didn’t steal you if you yourself went into his arms willingly and the thought of losing you might as well mean the same as stepping away from his stardom which he’s fought long and hard for.
It hurts his pride to say, but the all-too-familiar feeling of insecurity over how you could do so much better and bag someone cooler than him makes him stay in place than mingle with you at the moment. And that of course wouldn’t go unnoticed by at least one of his bandmates, K’Sante being the most observant on matters of the heart just like he’d once claimed to be. Ezreal embarrassingly admits then that he didn’t even bother remembering that fact on purpose and that it’d just resurfaced in his memory just then, but man does it deal a blow to his ego that he does indeed need romantic advice from the man, after all.
All it takes for K’Sante to have a conversation alone with Ezreal is to gently drag the man to the side of the hall that’s out of earshot of anyone, the former already knowing how to land ‘the talk’ without the latter brushing it off for needless humor. With any good advice, of course, comes the dreaded link back to what started it in the first place. The root of Ezreal’s insecurity that might have blossomed from time with you, but in reality it’s been a seed planted years ago by a love unrequited from none other than Lux.
Just the mention of it stiffens the already rigid pop-star and it’s all the more now for K’Sante to bring his bandmate back to reality with his laid cards. It was obvious that this was the first time Ezreal’s had someone love him back after countless endeavors with one-sided affections that sadly were starting to blur into a familiar feeling before you came along. Your attraction to him when you were easily more eye-catching than he was made it all the more harder to let go, and the voiced thought to K’Sante makes the artist take a different approach instead.
With Lux, it was always a battle over who was a better match for her, along with the already existing problem of who she was even attracted to since she showed no interest in anyone. That was why no matter how hard Ezreal pined over her, she would never cave, not when she hadn't even set her eyes on him long enough to pine back to begin with. The case is different with you; while having the opportunity to act cool and hip onstage to impress Lux was one of the good things about being an idol, it was the silly embarrassing but honest and true sides of him that got you to fall in love. There wasn’t any need to impress when your giddy heart already sang for him in all his failures and shortcomings.
With you, there wasn’t a need for him to change, to morph into some cool guy he knows he will never really become. And while it was also humiliating to have his downsides laid out like this infront of him, K’Sante’s words to push him back to being more himself with you than to change into someone capable of swooning you brought him to terms that made approaching you at least a little easier. And the comparison to Lux, while still stinging his heart every now and then, took just one look at your eyes that gazed up at him upon his arrival with K’Sante to confirm that you were anything but someone to be fought over.
With you, he could stay the same as long as he wanted to, no pressure to change to keep you by his side because that wouldn’t be what you wanted for him. And you loved him so much. Ezreal realizes it when you beckon him nearer, reiterating all the funny stories Kayn told you over prep time, genuinely unaware that your boyfriend was actually present during the time it happened but the desire to have him included when he’s always had to squeeze himself in every conversation he wanted to be part of just made you all the more lovable and even more irreplaceable in his eyes.
When you take notice that he was looking off and turn away from Kayn to focus solely on what changed about your boyfriend, the knowing glint in K’Sante’s eyes sends the guitarist grumbling away from the worrying duo cupping each other’s faces, your warm hands on Ezreal’s cheeks as you gaze upon him to try to read what was wrong. And in your eyes did another epiphany dawn on the pop-star just then.
Being an explorer and a one-hit wonder, he knows both titles are already an honor to have. Some people never find their way to the careers or goals and dreams they want, some not even aware of what they want. He should consider himself lucky to have found both his dream and a career that keeps him in high spirits for whatever else life has in store for him.
But being that both occupations meant never staying in one place for long enough meant that nothing could ever be his for his entire life, and that everything has to come and go somehow. His adventures were proof enough of that: he’d start in a brand new place, work out its systems and habits down to a T and then when it was all said and done he’d be bored enough or curious to go elsewhere and the cycle repeats. It sure sparked his passion ablaze but it also meant that winding down to a slow stop would shake him up so much that he feared it. Or at least, that was how he’d thought it’d be until you rocked his world with a brand new adventure, one that just keeps starting anew and never the same path done once before.
At the same time, you were the breath of familiarity he needed once in a while whenever the dread of never belonging anywhere crept back in his mind. With nothing to his name that would last forever, what or who else was he to cling to but you, the memory of every adventure etched in the form of your memories as you listen to his stories? You are so good to him, the best thing that ever happened in his life and in you is so much of Ezreal’s life story shared to you and even experienced with you. The one constant in his life that he didn’t mind at all and the pain of knowing that maybe that wouldn’t be the case in the near future is the scariest and is one of the singer’s biggest fears.
You, the one who became his definition of love. Sappy as it was, Ezreal admits that nothing in his life ever came to him for free except the affections you so lovingly handed to him every moment of your lives spent together. Not even his journeys were his own, credit always taken for a varying team. Not even his own music was his own, labels taking them for themselves or his fame not exactly giving him the serotonin he gets when he’s with you. So when even his own name fades into the dust, long written and blurred, he knows now that all that he has that is all his is his love for you.
His love, one that he never figured out how much he has to give, but that which you take anyway and offer your own and drown him, but he relishes in your love that is just as free, just yours as much as his love for you is his. Both something that is yours and his for as long as either of you wanted it, and he was sure he wants your love for a long, long time.
Then he smiles. Eyes solely on you, never leaving your side like he ought to be. Your eyes shine back at him, like you’re so happy that out of all the love you get to receive, his is your best choice and it hits at his heart how in love he is with you, relieved that even in his worst you’d never stray from your spot by his side. You, the sweetest who waits so patiently even though he does the absolute bare minimum as a lover(in his opinion).
So when it became time for all to sleep and you’d been offered to stay over by Ezreal’s room, it was a surprise to you that he wanted to write a song before bed, telling you he’d barge in Aphelios’ and Sett’s room for the meantime while he still had the idea running in his brain. You knew that music would always be one of his passions, so your logic went that it wouldn’t hurt to burn some energy for something he loved to do. Kissing you goodnight for the day, he rushes to get his ideas to Aphelios and even Yone in another room.
When you wake up the next morning, Ezreal was still absent from his side of the bed even as the rays of sunlight peek through.
And while it wasn’t normal for him to miss out on his ‘sweet beauty sleep’, it also wasn’t surprising that he’d put so much effort into an idea of his, especially when it couldn’t already wait last night so why the hell would it wait this morning, too? You slowly shake your head in amusement, sighing softly.
When you rise and make the bed, your thoughts never escape Ezreal as you think of brewing him something as well as a treat for Aphelios who’d also probably be just as awake as your boyfriend. While the latter was nocturnal, your rockstar boyfriend isn’t so he probably annoyed his bandmate to equal both of them being tired messes by sunrise. (Although with Phel being a fan of Ezreal’s discography, you might argue that it isn’t so bad to work with an admired singer.)
Silently stepping into the kitchen, you notice that not even the early risers are downstairs to greet you. It is well past their time to rise and shine, so you wonder if everyone’s suddenly sleeping in or just incredibly busy in their own rooms or even out of the house.
Thinking that with K’Sante and Sett who wake up early for their ‘gainz’, it’s nearly impossible to believe that even they’d be absent to breakfast, when usually you’d come down to the sizzling sounds of Sett’s cooking and chatter about gym stuff that you’d politely listen to until you’ve had your caffeine(making sure you intake your preferred drink and not whatever protein induced beverage K’Sante offered you—if you can even call it that; sometimes the man simply gives you powder in a glass and calls it a day which makes both you and Sett gag) wherein you’d then have the energy to join in the conversation. Now, with a ghost town all over the halls, you shrug it off for now as you recall the real purpose you’re downstairs.
Since the boys had different tastes in coffee—certain people(person) can live with absolutely zero sugar and some prefer sugar amounts equivalent to sizes of elephants in their drinks—you decided to go with the packets they’d leave by the fridge for anyone who’d wanted to brew them anything. A genius idea by Yone who’d been sipping on caffeinated milk for too long—courtesy of the aforementioned ‘people who prefer elephant-sized amounts of sugar’—you thought to yourself with a chuckle.
With their drinks on a tray, you carefully went back up the stairs to softly knock on Aphelios’ room, politely signaling your entrance since Phel had no way to tell you that can come in(the door is unlocked, so you assume it’s fine). It was where Ezreal said he’d be, so it’d be the first room you’d check.
And what do you know, all members of Heartsteel were plopped around the room as if a party had just happened the night before. You open the door slightly so as to not wake Kayn who’d dozed dangerously close to the doorway, hunched over and arms folded on top of one of Yone’s sound systems. The latter is spotted nearer the owner of the room, sitting still next to K’Sante’s leaning form over the edge of Aphelios’ bed.
Sett, Aphelios’ roommate is sprawled over his own bed but without a blanket over him, which means he is just as knocked out as the rest of the band, and the two culprits you’re after are at the corner of the room, passed out together by Aphelios’ table. Thankfully, the only things below the latter were his notebooks, so nothing beneath him was getting weighed on.
Ezreal, whom you’d came into the room for, was in the worst shape to sleep in, huddled with what little space his mute bandmate had in his table which meant there’d be no space for you to lay the tray of coffee for them to wake up to, and judging by their posture you think they hadn’t even meant to doze off all in one room anyway, you set the tray back downstairs for them to reheat when they’ve woken up on their own accord.
Coming back to the room, you try to clean up as best you could, papers crumpled and thrown in the most random places, avoiding the areas too near to the sleeping men so as to not wake them. You head over back to Aphelios’ desk to see if there were any more crumpled papers to throw away for him when you spot a quote in the midst of the band member’s messy writing.
Could he shine down here for her?
A new song in the making, it seems. With a silent cheer for them to keep up their good work, you leave the room with pride that your boyfriend is such a hard worker, with lyrics written in such a sweet manner. It is only until a week later that that very lyric you read is staring back at you in a Genius interview with Heartsteel, apparently about their first soft rock song entitled—
“My Love, Mine, All Mine” ’s official lyrics were shown to the public for the first time and you realize it’s the very song the boys have stayed up so late for. And while the band teased Ezreal to no end about it in the public eye, only you knew that it was a fruit of all their labor and it was actually pride that seeped through their masked words.
With some research on the spot, you find out that this song was a love letter to not only romantic love, but based on its lyrics alone, you note that it was one for self-love, too. One of the things Ezreal was so cheap in giving, never giving himself the break he needs from the constant beat up to ‘prove’ something when he doesn’t really need to in your eyes. And now with this song confirming his lessons learnt, it just opens the dam of your genuine tears of happiness over the most romantic Ezreal’s been to both himself and you.
The waves of pride burst forth your heart’s gates, just like what Ezreal’s bandmates feel for him. It may not have been said directly, but this was the most honest the pop-star has been after years of always being malleable to what others’ ‘love’ expects him to be.
Come nightfall once again, and this time you have your boyfriend all to yourself after the hours of writing his song to you. And while he argues that he’d like to always sing on a well-deserved stage with an overwhelming audience, of course in his heart the stage is only set for an audience of one and it’ll always be for you.
You drift off to sleep that night to the love of your life solidifying his own feelings to you in the best way he knows how, and your heart tingles in the midst of fatigue to being called my love, mine, all mine .