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Zach woke up to the cold—cold darkness, accompanied by a lot of pain and a dash of nausea on the side. He twisted, attempting to break free from whatever held him as panic started to consume him.
"Zach, stop," a firm and familiar voice said above him. Very close, in fact. Too close for comfort, and Zach realized he was being held by a pair of arms rather than being pinned down with something on top of him. "Calm down," the voice added after a hiss of pain.
Zach immediately ceased moving. He recognized that voice. It haunted him almost daily in real life... and in his dreams. "Chris Kratt," he huffed, failing to keep his teeth from chattering and ignoring the sharp pain in his head as he tried to force words out around the slur that snuck up on him. "What's... What happened?"
"Your jet crashed," Chris said, and it took Zach a moment to realize that the Wild Rat was being even more tense than usual. "I couldn’t find anyone else but you. Snow's too bad to see. Found a cave, got you out of the storm."
Zach's eyes slowly adjusted to the little light available, taking in that they were, in fact, in a cave. If he hadn't already been shivering, he would have shuddered. Chris was pressed up against him in what Zach assumed was an effort to conserve body heat. It didn’t seem to be working, though. They were on the ground, curled up together, but the floor was quickly leaching away whatever heat they generated.
Then he realized the arms wrapped around him were bare. His own clothes were mostly dry, which was a small miracle, but Chris was stripped down out of his fleece jacket, wearing only his black undershirt. Zach wondered how wet Chris’ clothes must have gotten, for him to shed them like that.
Zach shifted to ask why but stopped when he heard Chris’ hiss of pain. "You're hurt," Zach said, trying to move off Chris. His head ached, but if he moved slowly enough, the cave seemed to spin slower.
"I think my leg got broken on the way down," Chris groaned. He wrapped his arms tighter around Zach, but whether it was to keep the warmth between them or to stop Zach from jostling his injured leg, Zach wasn’t sure.
Christ, and Chris had still managed to drag both of them to a cave? He knew firsthand how difficult it was to bring either of the brothers down. They had an uncanny way of constantly surviving any situation. But Chris must have been in a bad situation if he couldn’t find the drive to start a fire, at least. Had he used up his energy saving him? Zach suddenly felt warm. "I'll get some wood to start-"
"You can't," Chris said, his hand wrapping around Zach’s wrist with an almost crushing grip. "No offense, Zach, but you don’t strike me as a wilderness kind of guy. You go out there and you won't come back."
"I won't go far," Chris snapped, losing patience despite knowing something was off with Zach. "I refuse to die in this ice tomb. We need a fire."
"And you can find your way back in that much snow?" Chris growled.
The two men stared at each other in anger. Of course, Zach would get lost; even he knew that. He also knew that if Chris weren’t so injured, he would have been the one to go out and scavenge wood. The two of them would be sitting around a roaring, toasty fire right about now. But Zach was so useless he could only offer body warmth, and currently, he wasn’t even offering that.
Quietly, he slipped back into Chris’ arms, this time as the big spoon. Hesitantly, as though he no longer had control of his body, his hands slid down Chris’ arms, trying to rub warmth into them.
"Can I.. uh… can I help set the break?” Zach asked, embarrassed for stumbling over his words. Zach actually knew a lot about human anatomy and could help Chris reset the bone. You had to know the muscular and nervous systems to create inventions to control living animals. For the first time since he woke up, he felt slightly less useless. Zach didn't know how long he'd been out, but the last thing they needed was for the bone to heal wrong.
"Already did." Chris grit out.
Zach swore. Of course Chris had, and what an awful experience it would have been to do it on himself. For all intents and purpose, alone. In the dark.
Carefully, Zach pulled away again from Chris to feel along the line of his leg. There was a crude splint made from what was probably a tree branch and torn bits of parachute.
"Not the time to be getting fresh, Zach" Chris said jokingly, though Zach immediately pulled his hands back. “I require dinner first, at the very least.”
"You're insane." Zach said instead of replying to that, thankful the cave was dark enough to hide his blush. " You dragged my dead weight all the way here and then had to… had to set your own leg by yourself.”
Zach felt his throat constrict. Chris would have had better chances without having to worry about him. And the idiot just did all of that like it was nothing, for someone who was a sworn enemy.
"You’re thinking too loud, Zach." Chris complained. “Of course I saved you. You’ve done some shitty things in life, but you don’t deserve to die. I can only hope you would have done the same.”
Zach had a moment of doubt. Would he have done the same? For Chris, yes. For the other Wild Rats? He decided not to go down that trail of thought.
"I… I can't feel my toes. Or my fingertips. Is that bad?"
Chris swore under his breath, shifting to look up into Zach’s eyes. "It’s not a good sign. Can you move them?"
Zach furrowed his brow in concentration. "I don't know. It burns. Why does cold burn?"
Chris picked up Zach’s hand, and his fingers felt like ice too. Zach peered at Chris’ face and caught a tinge of blue on his lips.
"Shit.” Chris muttered. By now the two of them were shivering. “We’re getting hypothermic. Just… just stay awake, okay? Let me know if you start getting too warm.”
"We won't last long like this," Zach said, teeth chattering. He was tired of being cold and shivering. Just tired in general. What he wouldn't give for a nice, warm, bed.
"We will," Chris replied, holding Zach tighter. "I'll figure something out."
The two men were quiet for a few moments. Again, Zach was grateful that he was with Chris. He was so level-headed, so calm. It helped put Zach at ease. They would find a way out, they would-
“I can’t stop thinking about my brother, about my team.” Chris said so quietly, Zach had to strain to hear it. “Where are they? Are they okay? I have to survive. I have to help them.”
Oh. Zach suddenly felt like an asshole. He only cared about himself and Chris. How they would survive this ordeal. How Chris would save him again. Meanwhile Chris had not only saved him, preformed emergency first aid on himself, and was actively trying to keep the two of them alive, but he was terrified of what had happened to his team. To his own flesh and blood.
Not that Zach necessarily cared about the rest of the team, but… he did care about Chris. He had for a while now. It had been easier to pretend he didn’t when they weren’t in a life-or-death situation, but now it was all he could think about. He wanted them both to survive this ordeal and… and what? It wasn’t as though Chris felt the same way.
“What if… what if they didn’t survive the crash.” Chris asked in a broken voice. “What if I could have helped them?”
“I’m sure you tried your best.” Zach said awkwardly, not knowing what to say. If Chris hadn’t wasted his time saving him, maybe he could have helped his brother. His team.
“I didn’t, though.” Chris said, suddenly sitting up. The cold rushed in between them, and Zach started shivering in earnest. His muscles were sore from tensing them against the cold. “I panicked when I found you. I meant to get you somewhere safe, but I couldn’t leave you when I saw what state you were in.”
Zach didn’t know what to say. Chris had been that worried about him? About him??
“I abandoned them.” Chris suddenly sobbed, covering his face with his hands. “If they die, it’s my fault.”
Zach attempted to sooth him, attempted to pull him back down, but Chris seemed to be in full-blown panic. He pushed back and attempted to stand. Zach found his own panic rising in him at the scene. If Chris wasn’t level-headed, then surely there was a cause for panic.
He pushed it down though, and forcefully pulled Chris back, wrapping one arm around his back and the other one snaking up into his hair to hold his head to his own chest. Careful not to jostle the broken leg, Zach tangled their legs together. Chris gripped onto Zach’s clothing, sobbing into his sweater.
"Chris, it's okay. Come on, Chris. Come out of it for me." Zach mumbled, not sure what he was saying. He just needed to ground Chris, to sooth him.
Chris carefully unclenched his hands from Zach’s sweater and traced his way up to Zach’s face. Zach hadn't thought that he could get colder, but he realized he was wrong the moment Chris’ hand was no longer trapped between them. Chris didn't seem to care though, continuing his path and ignoring the way Zach's breath hitched slightly as Chris’ fingers brushed against his neck. When he got to Zach's cheeks, it took Zach a moment to realize that they were wet.
Before Chris could comment, Zach blurted out “I’m sorry.”
“For what?” Chris asked, his voice still thick with emotion.
“For everything. This is all my fault. You all came to stop me, and that’s why you were on my jet. Why we all crashed in the middle of nowhere in a blizzard.” Zach said, his own voice cracking. “You had to save me instead of people that mattered. You wasted your time on me when you should have just let me die. You’re hurt, and you’re still trying to help me, and I-“
Chris stopped him midsentence by pulling him down for a kiss. Zach, in turn, froze. He could no longer form coherent thoughts. His head was pounding, and he just wanted to sleep. If he was asleep, he wouldn't have to shiver so damn much. He couldn't quite feel his toes anymore, even if he was practically curled up in Chris’ lap in the darkness.
"Zach? Zach! Stay awake," Chris said, gripping Zach's shoulders painfully. "God, am I that bad at kissing?”
“No, not at all.” Zach said, tiredly. “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted you to do that.”
“Then stay with me. Please.” Chris said through chattering teeth. “I don’t think I can keep going on my own.”
The two men huddled closer together, though Zach couldn’t feel Chris’ heat anymore. If anything, he felt nothing. The cold had finally stopped. He couldn't tell, but Zach liked to imagine Chris’ lips were pressing small kisses against his hair as Chris buried his face in it.
“I’m sorry.” Zach murmured again.
“I know.” Chris replied.
Things got a little fuzzy after that, but he did force his eyes open again when he thought he heard something outside the cave. Zach glanced down to find Chris asleep. He panicked and shook him "Chris, wake up.”
Chris’ eyes fluttered, but he didn’t open them. Zach shook him harder. “Come on, Wild Rat. Tell me your plan to get out of here. You're always telling me you've got a plan when you go off."
"I never had a plan.” Chris muttered, cuddling in closer.
“Don’t fall asleep.” Zach hissed. “I’m pretty sure that was step one.”
Chris murmured something but didn’t return to consciousness. Zach whimpered. He couldn’t do this alone. If he lost Chris, he knew he would lose himself.
"Stay with me, Chris." Zach said, almost pleading. It was no use. Chris slept peacefully. Zach felt the full of sleep himself. His eyelids felt heavy and the more he blinked, the harder it was to open them again.
Before he could slip away again, a loud voice echoed through the cave.
“Chris? Zach?” the voice boomed over them. It was too loud. Martin always was the loudest on the Wild Rats. It took him a while to realize that someone was directly addressing him. He opened his eyes to find a pair of blue eyes looking back at him.
Martin was crouched down, pulling his jacket off and wrapping it around the two of them. He called to someone over his shoulder before turning back to him.
“We're going get you out of here." Martin said, and Zach blinked as something overly warm was wrapped around him. "I need you to let go of Chris, though."
"What?" Zach said, confused, now trying to bat off the blue material he was being wrapped in. It took longer than it should have to realize he could see now. Had Martin brought a light? Didn't matter though. Martin was trying to take Chris from him. Chris would get cold, and he would die.
"Easy, Zach." Martin said. “We’re going to help, I promise. But we can’t move you or Chris if you don’t let go.”
Whether he wanted to or not, his arms were pulled away from Chris by Aviva and Jimmy. His body ached from the sudden heat that blasted his body from where Chris’ body had been melded to his. Heat? That didn’t make sense, but he felt so hot he clawed at the jacket Martin had wrapped around him.
“Advanced hypothermia.” He heard someone say.
By this point, Zach was out of energy and was drifting again, and could no longer make sense of his surroundings. He lurched forward and fell into darkness, his last thoughts about Chris.
-
Zach woke up feeling warm, which was definitely an improvement over his last wake-up call. It was warm and the lights were muted, but not off, and when he managed to open his eyes, Aviva was sitting by his bedside. She was on her tablet, typing out code tiredly. Maybe she and him were similar in that it was often easier to lose yourself in work than deal a stressful situation.
Her face had a long gash along the side that had been stitched closed, and some bruising along her jawline, but otherwise appeared to be in good health. Zach tried to think back to the jet crash, but found it was all static.
"I didn't die?" Zach croaked out, announcing his wakefulness. Aviva jumped, so engrossed in her work that she was caught off guard. Definitely similar.
"Zach, You’re awake!” She said, a tired but blinding grin on her face. “Not going to lie, you had a us worried for a bit there.”
Zach closed his eyes, trying to focus on his extremities. "My feet itch."
"You got mild frostbite, so don't scratch them," Aviva explained. "And you had a concussion, but that's mostly faded, and you've been out for a while. Honestly, you’re doing pretty good. It took us a while to find you both and it could have been a lot worse.”
"What happened?" Zach asked, because apart from Chris finding him and getting them to a cave with a broken leg, Zach really had no idea what had gone down. "Chris-"
"He's fine. Martin and Koki are with him.” She replied. "His frost bite is worse than yours, and walking on that leg set back his recovery, but he'll survive.”
“This is all my fault.” Zach mumbled, suddenly feeling sick to his stomach. Chris was the only reason he was still alive, but it was him that had put them both in that situation.
“Yeah. It is.” Aviva said, not unkindly. Zach clenched his eyes shut, willing himself not to break down. “But you’re obviously sorry and learned your lesson, I can see that. And you helped keep Chris alive.”
“He was the one who kept me alive, not the other way around.” Zach said, a tear escaping down his cheek.
“I think it was a team effort.” Aviva supplied. “We had to physically pry you off of Chris, Zach. You begged us not to let him die.”
Had he? Zach had no recollection of begging for Chris’ life. As if the Wild Rats would let Chris die over Zach. He let out a pathetic laugh.
“Thank you for saving me. For saving us.” Zach said, sitting up. “I think I should go though.”
“Zach… You only just woke up after a life-threatening ordeal. Stay and heal.” Aviva said, standing up. She placed her hand on his shoulder, but he shrugged it off.
“No. I mean, no thank you.” Zach said, trying to shake off the wave of dizziness that hit him. “This is all my fault regardless of the outcome. I should go.”
“Chris will want to see you when he wakes up.” Aviva tried again. Zach didn’t know that he could face Chris. He didn’t know if he even wanted to. That kiss had surely been given while Chris was in a delirious state. How could Chris want someone like him? He wasn’t worth the younger man’s time.
“This was just a temporary truce. Tell him he can come grovel at my feet the next time you Wild Rats show up to ruin my plans.” Zach sneered, doing his best to put as much venom into his words as he could. He wasn’t sure he had succeeded, given the pitying look Aviva gave him. Regardless, she didn’t stop him from leaving.
-
Zach was so adamant that he never set eyes on Chris Kratt again in his lifetime, that he had actually stopped poaching animals. He knew Chris and the rest of the Wild Rats had continued ‘creature adventuring’, as they annoyingly called it, based on reports from Donita, Gourmand, and Paisly. Zach was secretly glad to know that Chris fared well enough to return to his old life.
He would hide away, lick his wounds. Somewhere warm, of course. In the meantime, he had appointed an interim CEO to run Varmitech Industries on his behalf. He just didn’t have the energy to run a large-scale company anymore. Maybe he and Chris had died in that wretched cave, and this was some sort of purgatory he would be forced to live. One where he couldn’t be with the man he loved, but nothing else held his interest anymore.
Maybe he would go back to school. Throw himself into his studies and reevaluate what he wanted to do with his life. The more he thought about it, the more he liked the idea. He decided he would study somewhere in Europe, maybe in London or France. Somewhere so populated, there was no way he would run into the Wild Kratts. If there was no wildlife, there would be no creature adventuring.
So of course, after only a few months of study, he discovered that the University of London was hosting an annual wildlife fundraiser gala. Surely karma wasn’t truly the bitch everyone made her out to be. Unfortunately, Zach realized, she was worse than a bitch, whatever that ended up being.
On the list of guest speakers, he spotted Chris and Martin Kratt’s names.
“Hey.” An extremely familiar voice said behind him, as he stared in at the gala. His feet had somehow walked him here against his will, and his eyes had betrayed him by scanning the room. Just one peek. Just one and he could get on with his life.
Zach spun around, coming face to face with the very man he was avoiding. Or was it spying on?
Zach swallowed. He could do this. What was one more disastrous conversation about feelings, right? Or with his luck, maybe he was about to get in shit for getting the two of them into that situation in the first place. He finally looked into Chris’ eyes.
"Hey." he replied, looking back at Chris to see that Chris had been watching him with an expression Zach couldn't quite identify.
"You didn’t say goodbye.” Chris said.
“No, I guess I didn’t.” Was all he could muster.
"Zach-"
"I never thought I’d be at a wildlife gala." Zach said, plowing right through Chris's attempt. “Odds probably weren’t in favour of this scenario. Stacked against, even.”
“You're not going to make this easy on me, are you?" Chris said, rubbing his eyes with the palm of his hands. Zach resisted the urge to let his shoulders hunch, just barely.
“I’m a piece of shit, Chris. You know this.” Zach said, staring off into the crowd. “I don’t know what you think you feel, but-“
“Zach, stop.” Chris huffed. “You don’t get to tell me how to feel.”
“But-“
“But nothing. Yeah, maybe you were originally a bad choice to harbour a crush on, and maybe you royally fucked up, multiple times, but this time-“
“Was the tipping point?” Zach asked, miserably.
“If you’d let me finish.” Chris frowned, tapping his foot in agitation. “Whether you choose to believe it or not, you did save my life in that cave. You helped keep me warm, offered to help fix my leg. You calmed me down when I was on the verge of a panic attack. Tried your best to keep me awake, and from what I understand, demanded that the team take care of me and not let me die.”
Zach sat there, unsure of what to say. Chris took advantage of his silence and continued.
“I’ve searched for you for weeks, only to find out you’ve quit poaching. Turned your back on your past and essentially disappeared. And then I finally found you, by accident of course, as a student at university. I assume starting your life over?”
“I couldn’t bare to run into you again.” Zach mumbled to the floor. “After you kissed me… I realized I wanted to do it again. I thought maybe you were just delirious. Just trying to distract me. There was no way you would want me.”
“You’ve proved that you’re not just a ‘piece of shit’, Zach.” Chris said, leaning down and catching Zach’s gaze. “I wanted you before this, against my best judgement, and I definitely want you now. Now I just feel less guilty about it.”
“That’s not a very romantic way of saying that.” Zach grumbled, trying not to smile.
"Then what do you say?" Chris asked, a mixture of hesitance and hope in his eyes. "Should we give this a shot?"
Zach stood, uncertain if he was going to bolt or agree. Chris seemed to be wondering the same, if the way he was watching Zach was anything to go by. He could run again… Chances were that this time might be the last time he ever ran into Chris Kratt again.
Running seemed like a viable option when faced with not having to let Chris down if he ever slipped into his old ways. And what if he wasn’t a good boyfriend? Couldn’t live up to his expectations?
"You’re thinking too loud again, Zach." Chris smiled, standing up from his chair and closing the gap between them.
“Are you sure you want to choose me?” Zach said with a slight tremor in his voice. If Chris changed his mind, it would break him… but it was the smart thing to do. He would make a terrible boyfriend. He would-
“Shhh. It must be so loud in there.” Chris placed his hands on Zach's cheeks, smiling softly as Zach leaned into the warmth. He kissed Zach's forehead, and Zach wondered if he could die from the sweetness of it all. He went to pull away, but Chris caught him by the crook of his elbow, gently pulling Zach back to him.
“Let me kiss you one more time. Just so I can prove to you it wasn’t delirium.” he said softly, coaxing him. Chris’ features were relaxed, softened.
Zach swallowed thickly before nodding. “One kiss,” he muttered, still nervous about the rejection that was a solid possibility.
“Just try not to fall asleep this time.” Chris chuckled as he backed him into the wall, cupping his face as he bent to kiss him. It wasn’t chaste as it had been in the cave, and infinitesimally warmer. Chris slowly took his time with him, tracing the seam of his lip with his tongue - a move that was well practiced indeed.
Pleased to see Chris was breathing heavily as he broke the kiss, leaning his forehead against Zach’s, Zach couldn’t help but press his lips to his again. It only lasted a second before he leaned back against the wall.
Not quite sure what came over him, Zach let out an obnoxious snore, to which Chris laughed and poked him in the ribs. It was a sound Zach had never heard from Chris, and he vowed right there that he would do his best to never disappoint Chris… to the best of his abilities, at least.
“Come on, sleeping beauty. Let’s go grab some food.” Chris looped arms with him and dragged him into the crowd.
"You did say you require dinner before I could get fresh with you." Zach said, hoping for another laugh from Chris. From his boyfriend. And was immediately rewarded.
"That's true, but I would probably have waived that requirement, just for you."