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Law was a catboy, the result of toying with a pirate who turned out to have the Nya-Nya Fruit. He had easily defeated the attacker, only to learn that she couldn't undo it. The good news? The transformation was temporary. It would wear off in a week. He had taken her heart as collateral in case she was lying.
Law scowled as he waited for Corazon to lecture him about underestimating unknown opponents. Corazon worried that Law's overpowered devil's fruit made him cocky.
The lecture didn't come. Corazon was staring at Law with glazed-over eyes. Corazon raised a hand and let it hang in the air between them.
Realization dawned.
"You want to pet me, don't you?"
"No! Of course not! Why would I want to pet you?" Corazon denied, fingers itching to do just that.
Law huffed. "It's okay. You can pet me, Cora-san."
"Don't do it, Cora-san! It's a trap!" Shachi warned, face and shades covered with scratches.
"Captain's claws are really sharp!" Penguin agreed, face also covered with scratches.
Law hissed at the two, and they dove to hide behind Bepo. They poked their heads out once Law turned back to Corazon. They made Xs with their arms and shook their heads in warning. Their sleeves were torn to shreds. Shachi was missing a hand.
Law looked up at Corazon expectantly. The large triangular ears on the top of his head flattened back. His gold eyes gleamed bright, the pupils slits instead of round.
Corazon couldn't blame the crew for trying to pet their captain. He wanted to pet Law, too. Catboy Law was super appealing. But he didn't want to get clawed. He already had too many scars.
Law made an impatient noise. He took Corazon's hand and placed it on top of his head.
Oh. Was Law's hair (fur?) always so silky and soft? Corazon tentatively stroked the space between his ears.
Law made a rumbling sound in his throat. Purring. Law was purring.
"No fair, Captain! You're playing favorites!"
"Well, duh. It's Cora-san. Are you really surprised?"
"No, but it's still unfair! We should get to pet Captain, too!"
"Yes, let us pet you, Captain!" The rest of the crew shouted their agreement. Most of them bore wounds from thwarted attempts to pet Law.
Corazon guiltily withdrew his hand. He didn't mean to cause conflict.
Law's tail flicked with annoyance. He slo-w-ly turned to face the crew. His expression promised death for interrupting the petting he had clearly been enjoying.
The crew jumped behind Bepo, leaving him to face their captain's wrath alone.
Bepo hung his head. "Sorry. I want to pet Captain, too," he admitted. When Law didn't immediately cut him down, Bepo looked up with sparkly eyes filled with hope.
"Please, Captain?"
"Pleeeeeeeease?" The rest of the crew poked their heads out, also sparkly-eyed.
Law's eye twitched.
The crew took that as a yes. They were wrong.
-----
After Corazon found all the shambled body parts, he coaxed Law into putting the crew back together. Then he bribed Law into reassembling them correctly, instead of a Frankenstein mishmash of body parts. Penguin's arm was not an appropriate substitute for Uni's leg. It was way too short, for one.
Law cashed in the bribe immediately. He climbed into Corazon's lap and nuzzled his chest until Corazon gave him his promised petting.
The clawed-up crew swallowed their complaints about the blatant Cora-san privilege on display. Or maybe it was Captain's privilege? Law was purring nonstop.
The crew moved on to their second favorite pastime: bitching about rival groups.
"Why does he have 'Captain' on his wanted poster? His own crew doesn't even call him Captain."
"Maybe Captain's part of his actual name?" Bepo guessed.
"No, there's quotes around it. See?" Shachi held up the poster he had been graffitiing. Eustass "Captain" Kid had a black eye and villain mustache, with several crudely drawn dicks aimed at his open mouth. The 0s at the bottom had been blacked out, leaving him with a 315-berry bounty. An 'r' had been jammed in between the first and second letter of 'Captain' and the 'ai' turned into an 'o.'
"It's like they're saying he's the Captain. And every other pirate captain is trash."
"I think you're reading too much into it." Corazon rubbed Law's cat ears to keep him calm, knowing how competitive Law could get. The tactic worked. Law stayed fixated on the dangling heart tails of Corazon's hood. He lazily batted at them.
The crew, however, remained insulted on their Captain's behalf.
"Then why is his bounty the highest of the Worst Generation? Captain has the coolest devil's fruit! Captain should have the highest bounty!"
"I don't care."
"You should care, Captain!" the crew yelled. "You should be number 1!"
"Straw Hat's bounty is higher, too," Penguin added, indignant. He held up Luffy's poster. Penguin had given him freckles, pigtails, and gigantic boobs.
"They think they're better than us! Having their first mates as Super Rookies, too!"
Bepo hung his head, depression lines over his head. "Sorry."
Ikkaku patted him on the back.
"Don't apologize, Bepo. Having a 500-berry bounty is impressive in its own way. And it's higher than Straw Hat's mascot."
"Yeah, Bepo. 'Sides, you're a first mate in name only. We all know Cora-san's Captain's true first mate," Uni added.
Bepo's depression lines thickened.
"Cora-san, you could get a 100-million berry bounty if you tried!" Shachi declared passionately. "You were the executive officer of a Warlord."
"Doffy wasn't a Warlord then."
Penguin tilted his head in confusion. "Still. It's weird. Why don't you have a bounty already? You betrayed the Marines and gave a stolen 5-billion berry devil's fruit to someone the government really wanted dead. Red Flag Drake has a 222-million bounty from, what? Killing some mid-level pirates? How many could he have killed?"
"Maybe you need an image change," Shachi mused. "Corazon doesn't sound intimidating. We should rebrand you as Slaughter General Murderer and have you fight with double chainsaws. No, three! Three-chainsaw style!"
"We're the Heart Pirates. We have a smiley face for our Jolly Roger. We travel around in a yellow sub treating the sick and injured. I don't think we're going for intimidation," Corazon protested.
He didn't want to be Slaughter General Murderer. He thought Corazon the Clown would be more fitting, but another group already had the circus theme. Besides, he was supposed to stay low-profile since he was officially dead. Sengoku aided that lie to keep the Marines and Doffy off his tail.
Shachi took Law's poster from Bepo. Bepo had drawn in cat ears, whiskers, and a paw patting Law's head. Hearts of all sizes filled the background.
"In any case, Captain's poster should say Captain," Shachi insisted. He slapped the bottom of the poster, as if willing the word to appear. "Trafalgar Cat-tain Law."
Law pricked his ears and narrowed his eyes with suspicion. Did Shachi just refer to him as Cat-tain? He better not have.
"No, but then it'd look like we're copying the Kid Pirates. Cat-tain should be something higher than captain! Like… Trafalgar Ad-meow-ral Law," Clione suggested, coloring Hawkins in black marker to give him a goth makeover.
Law snarled, baring sharp fangs.
Penguin smacked Clione. "Idiot! Cat-tain hates the Marines. It should obviously be Trafalgar Em-purr-or Law, Purr-geon of Death. We should send in pictures of Cat-tain now for the next wanted poster."
"No one's taking a picture." Law glowered, back arched and hackles raised. His tail was up stiffly like an exclamation mark.
Cute, Corazon thought to himself.
"Cuuuuuuute!" the crew squealed out loud.
Shachi whipped out a camera snail. "Smile, Cat-tain!"
Law did not smile. He leapt off Corazon's lap and activated Room. The sounds of apologetic shouting soon followed.
"Kitten! We were just kitten, Cat-tain!"
Corazon sat back and watched as Law cut up his crew again. It was going to be a long week.