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He stared daggers at the back. Actually, daggers weren’t the right word to use, especially since they weren’t out of hate. His staring had never been out of hate, spite or any other words that could resemble such a negative feeling.
But unfortunately, there was still that negative feeling ever since he had ran out on them two years ago. Them being, Stiles and their daughter. Something Derek had regretted the moment Laura had showed him a picture of the two.
“I don’t want you to hate me.” He finally spoke, voice almost lost. He didn’t want Stiles to hate him even though there were tons of reasons as to why Stiles should.
“I don’t hate you Derek,” Stiles told him, still not facing him, but also having a crack in the tone, “No matter how hard I try-I can’t do it. Not when I look at my little girl and see nothing, but your face.”
Derek could smell the raw emotion coming off of Stiles so easily as if he had picked at a wound that was starting to heal, but now just his appearance made it starting bleeding all over again.
“Stiles I’m-”
“Sorry isn’t going to change our past.” Stiles interrupted him, “Because the past can’t be changed.”
The words cut like a knife, Stiles was right. Nothing was going to change the fact that Derek had abandoned Stiles during the pregnancy. A pregnancy that was incredibly hard on the human, considering how much a werewolf baby was different in development than a human one. It wasn’t a high risk pregnancy or anything, but having an unborn werewolf, not being exposed to their father’s scent was rough, like that night at Lydia’s party bad.
Derek didn’t know how to react. That was had always been a problem for him. He didn’t know what to do when people were upset, or needed someone to confide in. There was a difference when people would come to him asking for advice. He was actually able to give it, but when they needed someone to actually listen, Derek was stunted.
Derek made a move behind Stiles and placed his hand gently on the shoulder, like he was afraid he was going to break Stiles even more than he already had.
That was a mistake.
Stiles was the probably the strongest person Derek had ever met in his life. When Stiles found out about the supernatural world, Stiles dove right into research instead of running for the hills like a normal person.
The moment Derek placed his hand on Stiles’ shoulder, Stiles broke down completely. And it hurt not only Derek, but for Stiles as well.
Because for Stiles, it was like a hurricane of feelings coming back with a vengeance. Taking Stiles back to place where loneliest time ever. Stiles quickly tried to swap away the tears that came falling, but it was no use. Just like it was no use for Stiles’ leg to hold onto the weight of pain. Stiles fell easily onto the floor, with Derek holding onto Stiles and not letting let go.
“You left me.” Stiles cried, in pain clenching onto Derek’s arm that was holding them tightly together, “I loved you with my very being and you just left me.”
Derek continued to hold onto Stiles, even as his body shook against Stiles’ own and placed his face into Stiles neck, “I’m so sorry, Stiles. So sorry that I left you when you needed me the most.” Derek declared voice filling with despair. “I would do all different if I had the chance.”
“How c-could you leave me?” Stiles questioned voice going hoarse from all the crying.
Derek doesn’t answer the question, but continued repeating, “I’m sorry.” Over and over to a point, it was like a chant if nothing else.
For some reason, that causes a rage to overcome as Stiles. The tears stopped as Stiles jerked away from Derek and turned to face him with hands clenched into fists and started to lash out on Derek, hitting Derek in the chest, knowing it wasn’t doing any harm to werewolf, but grateful that Derek didn’t do anything to stop the assault.
The blows came out shaky and almost weak, like a child throwing a useless tantrum, but for the first since Derek had discovered the tapes of the pregnancy, Stiles actually looked at Derek in the face. Stiles could see that Derek was hurting just as bad, if not worse.
Just like Stiles stopped completely. The rage that once over took now disappeared. All that remained was pain and seeing Derek’s pain was enough for a whole new round of tears to fall. Stiles turned away once more, not being able to handle the pain etched across Derek’s face, but Derek’s arms pulled them back together. Stiles silently lets the tears fall as Derek continued to hold on, head resting on Stiles’ shoulder.
They stayed like that for several minutes. Stiles leaning into Derek’s embrace while Derek rested his back against the wall.
“Forgive me.” Derek whispered, rubbing his cheek against Stiles. Stiles moved along the gesture, quietly, “I know it’ll take some time, but please forgive me.”
“I forgave you one time, but the night she was born…” Stiles whispered softly, eyes closed, “I missed you. Missed you like crazy.”
“I know.” Derek whispered, raising his hand to Stiles chin and angles Stiles face to where they were inches apart from kissing each other, “I missed you too. So very much.”
“You know it’ll take me some to forgive you again.” Stiles breathed out.
“Is the rest of your life okay?”
Stiles eyes opened at the question, gazing into Derek’s eyes and noticed how they were glowing their electric blue, instead of his normal green ones. Honestly, it didn’t matter what colors Derek’s eyes were when he asked the question because they both knew the answer.
“Yes.” Stiles told him, just as Stiles own eyes bleed into a pinkish hue as they kissed.