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“It really shows that you’ve never experienced the joy of just laying on the ground.”
“I’ve laid on the ground before though?”
“Yeah but you’ve never felt the joy of it before.”
“Robin I love you, what are you talking about?”
“You know when you just need to lay on the floor and just not feel like you exist and enjoy the grounded perspective of the world?”
“I mean no, I’ve never really felt like that.”
“Well then this is the perfect time for you to do it… Wait!”
Robin abruptly sits up and crawls over to his record player, sits on her heels for a second looking at his selection then decides and slides a record out of its sleeve. They set up the needle and the music begins to play, soft and slow.
She crawls back to Steve and flops back down on her back. He groans when he hears her back crunch loudly.
“Just lay here on the ground with me. think about anything, literally anything. What you did today, something stupid you said to too many people six years ago, or something you want to do. Be existential.”
Steve settles into the floor and listens to Robin’s steady breathing. Staring at the ceiling, his back feels a little better already. He begins to get lost in his thoughts, while he wasn’t thinking about something stupid he said six years ago, he was thinking about something he said. Specifically to Jonathan.
He still feels terrible. How could he say something so awful to someone? He knew how, but didn’t really want to admit it. He’s so glad he's not like that anymore. That his insecurities aren't so focused on what he thought Jonathan might be unintentionally threatening.
To the past version of him Jonathan threatened his sense of stability, he knew that Nancy and Jonathan got along better romantically than himself and Nancy. But Nancy was one of the few things he used as an excuse to prove he was still straight. Now he knows better and while he’s still scared he feels so much lighter. He knows, Robin knows, Nance knows and Jonathan knows. They are his closest friends, his ride or die’s literally. Almost dying together really establishes and strengthens that bond.
As he continued to think about various topics in various depths. The record quieted, the final notes of the song fading out. He started to come out of his thoughts, feeling groggy almost. Like his head was full of clouds. He started to hear Robin's breaths again, the occasional sniff on the inhale.
“Robin..” Steve asked in an uncharacteristically quiet voice.
“Yeah?”
“Can we hug?”
Had the tension not been palpable even to Robin she would’ve made fun of Steve a little. But not this time, it’s like they knew he was having some thoughts. Robin scooched closer and wrapped their arms around Steve. Steve buried his head in the collar of Robin’s shirt.
“Do you get it now?”
“Get what?”
“Why I lay on the floor?”
“Yes."
"I love you Rob.”
“I love you too Stevie.” They placed a small kiss on the top of Steve’s head.