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Perfection.
Something to be strived for and rarely achieved.
Something that came to Hyoma seemingly naturally… with his perfect face and perfect hair and perfect smile and perfect everything….
Something that Zantetsu rarely even came close to, and faked more often than not. Something that he craved more than anything.
But not for himself. Never for himself. He cared very little about doing things perfectly, because he never had and probably never would. Rather, he cared about doing things perfectly for Hyoma, because Hyoma exuded perfection with so little effort. Even the things he did wrong were done with such ease and confidence that Zantetsu couldn’t help but love and respect it, all while thinking that only Hyoma could do things incorrectly so perfectly.
Ease and confidence.
Things Zantetsu couldn’t wrap his head around.
Confidence maybe, because each time he was scolded by his mother as a child she told him he did things with such bullheaded confidence, despite never giving much thought to anything. Which really truly wasn’t intentional, if one could even believe that. He was just unlucky, maybe. Unlucky that every single thought that crossed his mind was wrong in some way. Unlucky that every move he made was incorrect until someone instructed him directly, telling him exactly what he needed to do. Guiding him right where he needed to be.
The only lucky thing he had ever managed on his own was successfully capturing the heart of one Chigiri Hyoma, which really, he was not sure how he had managed that one.
Zantetsu still remembered their first date, almost exactly a year ago today, and how he had absolutely fucked up and dragged them to a restaurant where neither of them could stomach the food. He had gotten lost, and while internally panicking, he put on a cloak of confidence that he had done all of this on purpose. Every single bit. Including the walking back and forth and around the establishment they were actually meant to go to. Hyoma had smiled and told him he liked talking to him and wanted to go on a second date, and Zantetsu had sworn to himself that the next one would be better. That he would see more and more of Hyoma’s pretty smile.
Well, he wasn’t sure if the next one was better, but Hyoma was still with him to celebrate their one year anniversary, and Zantetsu really couldn’t ask for more.
Hyoma said he liked his dedication and loyalty. He liked his desire to please and to make Hyoma happy. He liked his genuine, heartfelt effort in doing everything the right way, even if he fell very short of the mark.
Hyoma loved him, and while Zantetsu wondered if that level of affection was earned or deserved, he was more than happy to accept it, and he wholeheartedly loved Hyoma back.
Hyoma, his perfect little boyfriend who had promised Zantetsu a nice surprise for their anniversary, and Zantetsu had sworn the same.
“Don’t go too crazy…” Hyoma had warned the week before when Zantetsu said that he wanted to make him dinner. He had been practicing cooking a special dinner with his mother so she could tell him exactly what to do. It still wasn’t perfect, and he often let the food sit on the pan too long and the bottom got burnt, but it was decisively edible and mostly delicious and he just wanted to do something for Hyoma that would prove his worth. Zantetsu wanted to show that Hyoma didn’t need to do everything for him, and he could take care of him and feed him and shower him with the care he deserved.
It was a simple dinner, so it wasn’t crazy, as Hyoma had asked. A protein and a starch and a vegetable side, perfect for athletes such as themselves, but still special enough for his Hyoma. Breathing in deeply through his nose, Zantetsu tried to steady himself as he watched the food on the stove very closely, keeping an eye out for any smoke or other signs that the food was about to catch fire. Surprisingly, that had only happened once while cooking with his mother a couple of weeks ago, and had yet to occur since. A bit too much oil was used to sear the meat, so this time he measured out exactly one tablespoon full to ensure that nothing would begin to smoke or catch fire.
Holding his spatula in his hand, Zantetsu watched over the stove like a guard watching over a castle. Or something like that. Everything was coming along swimmingly, and he was quite pleased with himself. Hyoma was on his way over, and soon, everything would be all ready for their evening.
He started daydreaming, wondering what Hyoma was bringing for him. He was sure he would love it, whatever it was. Maybe it was a cake… though did people celebrate anniversaries with cake? It wasn’t necessarily a birthday, but it kind of was… the birthday of their relationship… it made sense to Zantetsu to celebrate with a cake. That’s why they had cake at weddings right? There was just no candles to blow out on a wedding cake… so maybe a cake like that would be nice….
Secondarily, maybe it was a tangible gift. Something he had been wanting or needing… He had seen Hyoma browsing some websites a few weeks ago that looked like it would have clothes that he may like… but the thought of clothes made Zantetsu wonder…
What if Hyoma was the gift?
Hyoma was always reading, romance novels and thrillers and other things that Zantetsu couldn’t follow along with unless there was an audiobook to go along with it. But every once in a while, Hyoma would want to try things from his books. Different special dates and the like. But maybe… there was a different kind of book Hyoma wanted to try something from.
The thought made him flush, a picture of Hyoma all dressed up and pretty in lace and silk and Zantetsu was glad when the timer finally went off and reminded him to pull the roasted vegetables out of the oven, because it distracted him, however briefly, from the thoughts of Hyoma laid out like an angel in his bed. Oh… he would look so nice in white lingerie, though he wondered what color Hyoma would pick for himself -
Ouch! Fuck, he forgot the oven mit before touching the pan. Quickly grabbing it, Zantetsu thanked whatever higher power was out there that prevented him from dropping the baking sheet and allowed him to safely transfer the pan to waiting cooling racks on the counter. Of course, he cursed the same higher power that had allowed him to get distracted and burn the shit out of his hand. He just hoped that it would not interfere with any other activities Hyoma had planned for them later….
Oh there was the burning smell.
Now his heart was racing, pounding against his chest as he quickly turned off the stove, saving the meat that was searing up so nicely on one side. Lifting it with his spatula, hand still burning from the veggie pan, he sighed in relief as he noted that while a bit darker than most people would like, it wasn’t necessarily burnt, and therefore, still salvageable and edible. He would just make sure to put the dark side down on their plates… which he would attend to before shoving his hand under the cool water of the sink to hopefully stop the throbbing pain in his fingertips.
He could imagine Hyoma now… entering his front door with a smile on his face, before noticing that Zantetsu was in the kitchen, soothing his burnt fingers, and sighing heavily. That sigh was one Zantetsu hated more than anything. He hated with his whole soul disappointing Hyoma, and he couldn’t bear to hear that sigh and the “what am I going to do with you, Tsurugi?”
Shaking the water off of his hand, Zantetsu decided he would tough it out, focusing now on plating up their dinner. He winced slightly as he grabbed his spatula again, lifting the food with care to ensure none ended up on the floor. Successful endeavor really, as only one stray broccoli ended up skittering across the floor and under the table. Sighing heavily, mimicking the one Hyoma always made, Zantetsu walked over to the table, already set with their forks and knives and wine glasses, specially purchased for this special occasion.
Getting down onto his hands and knees, because of course that was the best way to go searching after lost broccoli, Zantetsu crawled under the table, scooping the broccoli up into his hands.
The sound of a knock on the door startled him, causing him to shoot up and bump the table with his head. He winced as he heard the sound of glass tipping off the table and onto the floor, shattering behind him into a million tiny pieces.
He heard the front door open, and he knew there was no hope in covering up this mistake, so he did the only thing he could think to do.
“Hyoma? Don’t take off your shoes yet, there is glass in the kitchen.”
“Glass?” Hyoma’s voice met his, and he heard his footsteps as he walked closer to his location. “Tsurugi? Where are you?”
“Under here…” Sticking a hand out from under the table, he waved at Hyoma with the broccoli to alert his boyfriend to his location. Hyoma leaned down, looking at him, before standing back up with a sigh. The exact sigh Zantetsu had been trying so hard to avoid.
“Stay right there,” Hyoma instructed, stepping around the broken glass to the broom propped up in the corner of the kitchen. He made quick work of sweeping up around the table, the glass making a tinkling sound as he swept it into the dust pan.
After returning the broom to its home, he held a hand out for Zantetsu to hoist him off the ground. Which he gratefully accepted, forgetting briefly that his hand was burnt to a crisp and he couldn’t help but hiss as Hyoma held his hand.
With a frown, Hyoma turned his hand over, looking with concern at the bright red marks on his fingertips.
“Oh, Tsurugi…” Hyoma shook his head, walking over to the sink to grab a clean rag to douse in ice cold water. Placing it on Zantetsu’s palm, Hyoma pushed him down into a chair before holding the rag there firmly, once again helping to soothe the pain. Though the shame of not being able to successfully pull off this dinner without hurting himself or breaking something still hurt more than this burn.
“Hyoma, I’m so sorry…” Zantetsu apologized, hanging his head low as Hyoma picked the rag up slightly to check the burns. Making sure they weren’t so serious that Zantetsu needed to see a doctor, he suspected. A course of action Zantetsu would fully refuse because he simply did not want to ruin their evening any more. And he really wanted to see Hyoma’s surprise.
“It’s alright… Are you okay otherwise? No cuts or gashes I need to attend to?”
“No…”
“Not this time at least.” Hyoma smiled as he stood back to his full height. He cupped Zantetsu’s face between his hands, forcing him to look up at him, though all Zantetsu really wanted to do was pout. He had so wanted their first anniversary date to be so special…. He really wondered why he could not do a single thing right, even when he tried his hardest.
“What’s that face?” Hyoma asked, cocking his head to the side as he looked Zantetsu over. “Why so sad? Dinner smells nice. Thank you.”
“It’s probably all cold now…” Zantetsu mumbled, not wanting to meet Hyoma’s eyes as he continued his pity party. “I’m sorry you have to see me like this…”
“Tsurugi, it’s fine ,” Hyoma restated, squeezing Zantetsu’s cheeks until his lips puckered. “I’m just glad you’re not seriously hurt. How long were you under the table by the way?”
“Just a moment… the glass fell when you knocked…”
“Ah see this one is my fault then. No harm done, except to that wine glass,” Hyoma smiled, letting his face go before walking away to get their plates and the bottle of wine from the fridge. He poured them one glass, set it between them, before patting Zantetsu’s thigh, letting him know, it really was okay. “We’ll just have to share tonight, it looks like.”
Zantetsu opened his mouth, wanting to make a comment that there were more glasses that he had bought, the six glass set now reduced to five by his clumsiness. But, he decided against it, closing his mouth and nodding quickly.
Hyoma always knew how to save the day with the smallest things.
Perfect.
Something Zantetsu would never be.
“Thank you for all of this, Tsurugi.” Hyoma sat his fork and knife down with a soft smile, a clean plate, and a satisfied sigh. “You really have been practicing.”
“I wanted to make sure you loved it,” Zantetsu stated, proud of himself that at least one area of his hard work had paid off with shining colors.
“Well, you succeeded. You really are the best, you know that right?”
“No… that’s you, Hyoma.”
Shaking his head, Hyoma stood up, plopping himself down on Zantetsu’s lap as he wrapped his arms around his neck. Kissing the corner of his mouth, Hyoma smiled before pinching his cheek.
“None of that tonight. You’re the best. You keep things exciting. I never know what I’m going to get when I walk in your front door, and I love that.”
Frowning, Zantetsu wrapped his arms around Hyoma’s waist so that he would not fall or slip off of his lap, trapping him there until Zantetsu said so.
“Even if the surprise is my injured self once again?”
“Okay that I would like to decrease, but mostly because I worry about you. I don’t mind taking care of you… nursing you back to health…”
A devious little smile appeared on Hyoma’s face, and the memories from earlier popped into Zantetsu’s head. Specifically the ones related to why his hand currently throbbed with every beat of his heart, which really sucked considering his heart rate was now increasing with each perfectly placed kiss Hyoma was leaving on his face.
“You’re responsible for my burn too, you know.”
“Oh?” Hyoma raised an eyebrow, wondering how exactly he contributed to that.
“I was thinking about my surprise… and what it could be,” Zantetsu mumbled, allowing Hyoma to push his glasses up into his hair, perfectly content to do whatever he pleased whenever he pleased. Of course, Zantetsu never minded, because he doubted he would ever want to tell Hyoma no.
“What do you think it is?” Hyoma asked, a wicked smile on his lips as he leaned back, watching Zantetsu’s sharp eyes drift over his face and lips and torso, settling oddly on the collar of his shirt.
With his burnt hand, Zantetsu reached up, pulling Hyoma’s collar to the side, not exactly sure if what he was looking for would be there or not, but it couldn’t hurt to look at the very least… but, he did not have to look for long, as pulling the collar back by just a few inches revealed a lacy, white strap, curling perfectly over Hyoma’s perfect skin on his perfect shoulder.
Perfect.
“Is that my surprise?” Zantetsu asked, his voice cracking as he spoke, wondering when the moment would come that he would get to see exactly what that strap was attached to.
“One of them.” Hyoma grinned, shaking Zantetsu’s hands off as he stood, grabbing their plates and walking them over to the sink to begin washing them. Zantetsu watched him from a polite distance, not missing the exact moment Hyoma stuck his thumb into the waistband of his jeans, sliding the fabric down just enough for him to see the matching bottoms hiding below his pants.
“One?” His voice croaked again, and Zantetsu braced himself on the table, unsure if this was really his reality or if he had dreamed it all up yet again. Which, really would’ve been plausible considering how much Hyoma liked to tease him.
Holding up a finger, Hyoma repeated that yes, this was just one of his surprises. The pain in his hand was now forgotten, and the shattered wine glass was all but a distant memory.
Zantetsu didn’t need to be perfect. Hyoma said so. He was exciting and memorable and kept things new and fresh and unpredictable. Even if that wasn’t his goal.
He didn’t need to be perfect.
He was as close enough to perfect as he could get, and there was really no other point.
He could touch perfection every day if he really wanted to… and god, did he want to.