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its the fifth time hyunjin won "most beautiful idol". he's always told how handsome and gorgeous he is.
you would think he would feel grateful, right?
no. hwang hyunjin hated it. and he's selfish for it.
shouldn't he be greatful? all these people around the world thinks he's beautiful, shouldn't that be an achievement?
hyunjin wished he was more appreciated for his talents or personality rather than his looks.
yeah he worked on his looks to make sure he wasn't "ugly", but he worked so hard to get where he is.
his dancing , vocals, rapping.
he was so bad at dancing when he first joined as a trainee, it took him years to get where he is right now.
all those vocal and rap lessons were hard. the teachers were so mean and harsh.
it was so tiring.
hwang hyunjin is fucking tired.
--
i was scrolling mindlessly on twitter, when i heard a knock on my door
i look up to see felix standing in the doorway, with his hair half up and half down, with the curves of his lips slightly up.
i smile and put down my phone.
"hey" i motion for him to come in.
"hey, what's up?" he says as he steps in and closes the door and walks up to my bed.
"oh uhmm.. nothing.." i said.
"nothing?" he sits next to where my legs are kicked out
"i was just.. scrolling through twitter."
felix's smile drops.
"twitter? thought you deleted it.." he says, eyeing my phone.
"oh.. yeah, about that.. i reinstalled it..." i mumbled, and started fidgeting with my blanket.
felix sighs. "why?"
why? that's a good question.
"uhm.. i don't really know. it was like a impulse thing.. i don't know.."
felix looks up at me with a look that ive quickly grown used to in the past few weeks.
felix opens his mouth but closes it. trying to find the right words but failing.
he sighs again.
"can i see your phone?"
my eyes widen and i start to panic. felix seems to notice immediately.
"oh hyung, im not going to look at your phone. im sorry for not clarifying.." he says with a apologetic look.
i calm down a bit and ultimately give him my phone. he sets it at the end of the bed.
he motions me to bring my legs in. i sit up and sit criss cross. he sits directly infront me and takes my hands.
we sit in silence until i break it.
"i did it again. im sorry."
"don't apologize, jinnie. it's not your fault."
"am i really just.. a pretty face?"
felixs face morphs into sadness once again.
"no. not at all."
i start to tear up and shake my head.
"hyunjin hyung. you are so talented. your dancing is amazing. your rapping is top tier. your singing is so soft and sweet. there's a reason your in this groups and it is not because of how you look."
"yongbok..."
"hyunjin i love you so fucking much. your not just beautiful, but funny... sweet.... kind... a lovely person to be around and just talk to. and let's not get started on how talented you are outside of idol things.... your art?! beautiful. absoloute masterpieces. you tell stories with them just like you do when dancing. you also take care of everyone you know. older and younger, it doesn't matter their age. you treat them like family..."
i sat in silence, processing every word he speaks.
"if people can't realize that your such an amazing and caring person and not just a pretty face then fuck them. they just have nothing else better to do then to be insecure and bully others for no reason."
i chuckled. lix is really funny sometimes in serious moments but it's okay.
"really?"
"yea, really. "
..
felix opened his arms, "hug?"
i stared blankly then smiled which in return made felix smile.
i lean forward into his embrace.
felix really gives good hugs .
"wanna fuck?"
nevermind it was ruined.
"felix what the fuck. "
"I WAS JUST JOKING!! unless.."
"no felix oh my god." i whined.
"love you, hyung.
felixs hugs are second best. no one can beat chan hyungs hugs..
"love you too, lix."