Chapter Text
“Benji, could you look through this drive for me? I need anything that seems like a lead.” Ethan asked as he walked into the safe house and tossed the hard drive to Benji.
“Sure thing. I’ll have it for you within the next hour or so. What exactly were you wanting off of it?” Benji asked as he worked on encrypting the drive.
“I want anything leading to Martin Bruitolo or Sarah Franklin.” He requested and watched as Benji simply nodded.
“Alright, got it.” Benji said and pulled out his tablet making notes of some things as he worked on the drive on the laptop. “Anyone else? There’s dozens of names on here.” He asked as the file expanded with lists of names.
Ethan paused and thought about it like he wasn’t sure of the lead on some of these people or if they were just a waste of time. “You know to go over everything else after to be thorough but mainly just those two.” He said and sat next to Benji. “Oh also look at…” Ethan scanned over the names on the screen and scrolled to the bottom where Benji hadn’t read yet. “Also look for anything on Emily Price. She seemed to be involved with someone on this list or was of importance then disappeared. It seems suspicious. We need to find the main source. They have documents leading to nuclear tech.” He suggested.
Benji didn’t say a word and felt his body freeze, his mouth go dry, and his hands get clammy. “Okay. I uhh got it.” He said and tried to hide any shaking in his voice as he took the laptop and started to try and work. His mind spinning as he thought about them possibly finding out about his past.
Ethan looked at Benji for a second in a way that felt like looking through him before he got up to head into the other room knowing Benji usually worked better without being hovered over. “Let me know when it’s done and make a backup copy.” He said and gave Benji’s shoulder a reassuring squeeze before exiting into the other room.
“Alright.” Benji muttered quietly as he typed things out and worked on it all for what felt like hours but was somehow only thirty minutes. “Do I risk being framed as betraying the IMF, getting found out, or a third worse possibility I’m not thinking of.” Benji whispers to himself as he hovers the mouse over a folder listed as ‘Emily Price’ which was his deadname from only 5 years ago. He right clicked it before going and clicking delete then removed it from the recycling folder and planned to put the copy with the deleted files onto the backup. “They're going to kill me for erasing her… I need an excuse.” He talked to himself more as he worked the nerves being pent up inside. He quickly finished it all up and hoped for the best as he saved it then grabbed his laptop carrying it to where Ethan was.
“Ethan, it’s done. I didn’t get a lot and there were dead ends on some of the names and folders.” He explained as he pulled everything up and handed it to him to go through.
Ethan looked the files over and spent the most time on the names he’d given. “Where’s the third name I gave you? The whole folder is gone.” He asked and looked at Benji and was met with a split second of ‘deer in the headlights’ look. “I guess we got what we needed but it’s weird that folder is missing..Can you try and reinstall it?” He said trying to calm down Benji a little since he seemed panicked.
“I guess I may have deleted it. I can try pulling it back up if you want me to. It basically didn’t have any info that wasn’t five years old and even that was limited.” Benji tried to make an excuse and pulled the laptop away from Ethan. He knew he was probably giving off all signs of tension and nervousness but couldn’t help it. He bit his lip as he did some coding. “Here’s the file but it’s pretty useless. No photos or anything useful other than a couple old addresses and phone numbers. If she were a lead I’d say we check out the house but she’s not. So I think we should leave the family alone if they live there.” He rambled a little and silently prayed Ethan took the bait and agreed to not go to the house since it was his parents address still.
“I think we should go there to check it out. Maybe they kept her stuff to look through. See if it’s connected and if the family knows the other people we have to look into.” Ethan said and didn’t notice his Benji’s face paled at the mention of checking out the house. “We can head there now and Brandt will set up some sort of meeting tomorrow with Martin since he seems to be the CEO of a company. I’ll have you come with me to both and then you sneak off to get info off the laptops or wherever you can while I keep them distracted.” He instructed and checked the time and directions to get to the address.
“I really have to go with you?” Benji asked even though he usually was excited to be out in the field or doing things with Ethan.
“Yes you have to go. It should be a pretty quick retrieval. Luther’s going too.” Ethan shrugged and got up to get changed.
“I guess I’ll get ready to go. Do we need masks or anything?” He grabbed his laptop and took the drive out and went to the other room getting ready once Ethan assured him that they didn’t need masks or anything else. He got everything ready to go in the car then went into the other room and tried to make himself presentable but also to check that nothing about himself screamed his past self. He didn’t want his secret blown. “I look fine…It’ll all be fine.” Benji whispered to himself before grabbing his bag of equipment. “Ready?” He asked looking at Ethan and hoped he wasn’t able to see right through him that he was an anxious mess.
Luther drove the van as Benji provided directions till they arrived at a small corner house that was all brick and looked cozy but a lot of run down.
“This is the place? You’d think a fancy analyst would live somewhere nicer and especially if the family got money due to her disappearance. Guess it looks cozy.” Ethan said as he put an earpiece in and gave one to Benji as he went over things with Luther before he got out and waited for Benji before heading to the front door using the knocker and wanting for an answer.
Benji stood behind Ethan trying to keep himself as hidden as possible behind him. . He waited for an answer and went up and down on the balls of his feet to his tiptoes. “Well they aren’t here. We should go.” Benji said after only a few seconds since they’d knocked. “If they answer, do we use fake names or do I fake an American accent?” Benji asked not sure what the game plan was as the door opened before Ethan got an answer out.
Mrs.Price came to the door and looked at Ethan then Benji. “Can I help you gentleman?” She questioned and wondered why they were there. She kept her gaze mostly on Ethan since he was up front but looked at Benji a couple times.
“Yes ma’am. We are with the government and have been looking into your daughter’s case and may have a couple possible leads but need to speak with you and your husband and Emily’s two sisters. If possible.” Ethan said and tried to make it seem like Benji’s mother had a choice but he and Ethan knew they didn't. It was just a trick to get them to agree to let them in.
“Could I get a peak at some form of a badge and then you two are welcome in.” Mrs.Price said sweetly with a small smile and watched as Ethan and Benji both pulled their fake badges out of their pockets and showed. She nodded and stepped to the side to let them in. “Roger and Chloe, we've got company from the government. They’re here regarding Emily.” She said it loud enough for anyone in the home to hear. The husband made a small grunt in response from the other room and a girl around 26.
“Is there new news about Emily?” Chloe asked and had a hopeful look that sent a shiver down Benji’s spine and made his soul feel like it was going to leave its body. He had times of feeling guilt about how he left but he’d never had to face it in person.
“There isn’t yet but we may be able to find some soon.” Ethan said and headed into the living room where they were all led to. He sat on the couch as the others all sat in their separate chairs.
Benji sat next to Ethan and quickly glanced around taking the living room in and how things had changed in the last five years. He stayed quiet not sure what to say and let Ethan lead the conversation at first, as he usually did in these scenarios.
“When did you last see her and was she with anyone?” Ethan questioned and had a clip board with question points of what to ask and who was a person of interest.
“She disappeared 5 years and 2 months ago. She wasn’t with anyone when it happened, she’d come home from work late and the next day she was just gone and never came back.” Mrs.Price said recounting when it happened. “Would either of you boys like a cup of tea?” She offered as the kettle went off in the kitchen.
Benji looked to Ethan who said no then he looked to his mother who was looking at him for an answer as well “Uh no ma’am. Thank you.” He said and looked back down to the clipboard on Ethan’s lap reading the questions from afar. “Have any of you spoken to Charlotte since the disappearance? Also if you could we need an address to go question her as well.” Benji asked and felt proud of himself for finally speaking up and getting involved.
“We haven’t had a lot of contact but we’re meant to meet up next week for the first time in five years. We’ve only had a few phone conversations since Emily left. Charlotte has always been independent and shut off from us a lot. I can give you her address though.” The dad said and grabbed paper and wrote it out and handed it to Benji.
Benji took the paper and handed it to Ethan as he started to ask more questions. Benji got up and walked to the kitchen where his mom was making tea. “Where’s the loo?” He questioned and tried to hold back fidgeting or looking around too much in the kitchen.
“It’s up the stairs, second door on the right.” She said and smiled as she took her cup of tea and went back to the living room with a tin of cookies she set on the coffee table in front of the others. “Help yourselves to biscuits.” She offered
Benji went upstairs and ignored the instructions she’d given and headed to his former room and was immediately hit with nostalgia at the fact everything was the same as he’d left. He took a deep breath and headed over to the laptop and started it up and logged in with his username and password and quickly looked through files to see if there was anything he needed to hide from the others and IMF before he plugged in the drive and started downloading everything. He spun around in the rooley chair and looked over everything and get like he was bit by a wave of different emotions. He tried to get rid of them and shook his hands out before popping his knuckles trying to ground himself. “I need to pull it together.” He muttered running a hand through his hair, forgetting he was on comms with Luther and probably Ethan because of their ear pieces.
“You okay in there, Benji?” Luther asked as he’d heard more muttering but none loud enough to make the words out.
“Jesus!” Benji blurted out quietly as he’d heard Luther’s voice forgetting that he was on comms. “Yeah, yeah. I’m fine, sorry. Totally fine.” He lied and knew that he may not fully seem alright but hoped it would just be ignored for now.
“You sure don’t seem fine…But if you say so man.” Luther said and held back any smart comments he was thinking not wanting to distract from the mission more.
“If you’ll excuse me for a moment I need to call my supervisor and let him know about our plans to pursue Charlotte next.” Ethan excused himself and went outside and pulled his phone out but didn’t call anyone at the time. “Benji what’s going on? Do I need to come up there?” Ethan asked in a bit sterner a tone then he’d intended.
“Can you both quit worrying about little old me? I’m fine, truly. Just got nostalgic over something up here that reminded me of my childhood. It’s sappy as hell but I guess you two deserve an explanation so you’ll quit bugging me about it. I’ve almost got everything onto the drive, should only take another minute or two.” He reassured them as he watched the drive finish downloading. He pulled it out and put it into his jacket pocket before looking around the room one last time. He looked at his laptop area and the different figurines near it and impulsively reached out and grabbed a small Lego man then looked at the bed and took a small stuffed dinosaur off and put it into his jacket pocket with the drive since the jacket had deep spacious pockets. He headed down as Ethan was finishing up with the family. Benji stood next to Ethan as he needed the door.
“Those are all the questions we had for now. If you’d like to give us a number to reach you at, we'll call if we get any other updates.” Ethan offered and wrote the number down even though he knew he’d likely never use it.
“Oh! I almost forgot another name to add into your search, possibly Adam Jordans. He’s the lead analyst at ComTech where Emily worked and that’s where both those people on your list work as well. All very high up positions.” The mom said.
Ethan nodded and wrote it down. “Alright, thank you for your help. We’ll be in touch.” He said and headed out and let Benji exit first since he seemed in a rush to leave.
Benji walked out his hand stuffed into his pocket as he rubbed the small dinosaur trying to soothe his anxiety that was reaching higher levels at the mention of a former coworker who caused him immense amounts of trauma. He sat across from Ethan in the back of the van and zoned out for a moment, his hand staying in his pocket on the stuffed animal the whole time.
Ethan looked at Benji and could tell he was zoning out. He gave him a second to compose himself on his own before he decided to intervene. “Benji?” He questioned and reached a hand out resting it on Benji’s knee. He watched waiting for any signs of recognition and looked at Luther and handed him the paper with the address of Charlotte on it “Let’s head here and get this over with since we have the meeting with Martin planned tomorrow.” Ethan instructed and looked back to Benji. “You alright?” He asked now that Benji seemed to be paying attention.
“Yeah, I’m okay. It just all felt weird back there sorry. They were really nice and then the room felt familiar but yeah I’m fine. We’re heading to the sister's house now?” He questioned and slid his phone out of his pocket and went to his message to Charlotte. ‘Go along with it. You don’t know me and know nothing.’ He sent her and got a thumbs up emoji in reply before he put the phone away. “Do we ask her the same questions and do I go download everything off her laptop?” Benji asked Ethan who was staring at him.
“Mostly the same question, maybe some new ones and then based on her answers we decide if we need anything off of her laptop. If we do I’ll give you a signal and you’ll know when it happens.” He explained the plan as Luther said they were there as they slowed to a park. “Let’s do this.” He said and led the way out of the van.
“They said it’s apartment 2B.” Benji said following behind Ethan toward the apartments looking for the right one as Ethan knocked and waited for an answer.
Benji stood behind him and was unintentionally holding his breath as they both waited. Charlotte came to the door and opened it. Ethan started his spiel of being from the government but never gave their names or specifics as Charlotte stared them both down before letting them in.
“I suppose you spoke to my parents already? Is there anything specific you two need from me to help?” She questioned and she sat on the couch leaving a small chair and a large bean bag type chair as their seating options.
Ethan looked between the chair and the beanbag then to Benji before he went and sat in the chair leaving the bag to Benji assuming he’d not mind it as much as he knew he would. “We spoke to them and asked questions and that’s all we need to do with you as well. When did you last see Emily and do you know of anything that could’ve caused her disappearance?”
“I don't really know anything. I’ve had no contact with her since she left. I know she had some sort of issue with a coworker or boss but never knew more than that.” She shrugged and looked from Ethan to Benji staring at him for a moment.
“Does the names Martin Bruitolo, Sarah Franklin, or Adam Jordans mean anything to you? They’re other people we want to look into. Your parents warned us about Adam but the others we have had suspicions of from the start.” Benji said taking the lead and he seemed on edge but more comfortable then he had at his parents house.
“Adam was the coworker she had issues with. She’d say he was like Satan. I don't think she worked around the others much, if at all. I can’t think of much else that would be helpful. I think her old work ID may still be here but I’m sure they deactivated it.” Charlotte explained with a shrug. “I have a feeling Adam didn’t cause her disappearance though. I feel like maybe she just ran away from it all, you know?” She said looming between Benji and Ethan.
“Okay, I’ll keep that in mind.” Ethan said and wrote some things down and looked over questions trying to decide what was next and gave Benji a look to get him to go get the info off any laptops in other rooms.
“Loo?” Benji asked as he struggled to get out of the suddenly sinking bean bag for a moment as he liked Charlotte who blankly stared at him for a moment sort of forgetting they were pretending they didn’t know each other.
“First door on the left. Careful with the sink the knobs are backwards. Cold is hot and hot is cold.” She said as if he wasn’t already very aware of both those things.
He headed down the hall and then entered his sister's office area and grabbed her laptop, putting the drive in and downloading all everything off it after briefly checking for anything that would reveal things about himself. He waited as it downloaded in what felt like slow motion so he tried to stay focused on the questions he could hear Ethan asking since it felt like things were different here than at home. He pulled the drive out and put it into his pocket before coming out his hands in his jacket pockets.
“Was beginning to think you’d died in the loo, Benj.” Charlotte said casually using even a nickname for Beni. She immediately covered her mouth, stunned that she’d slipped up “Shit..” She said quietly as Ethan looked at Benji and Benji looked between the two of them.
“I uhh..” Benji went to explain with an excuse but his mind went blank. He kept his hand in his pockets and started rubbing the dinosaur again feeling incredibly stressed. “Sorry.” He said quietly looking at Ethan as his gaze felt piercing.
“You know her and didn’t tell me? How do you two know each other?” He asked, gesturing at them both answers.
“We went to school together.” Benji said at the same time as Charlotte said “We worked together.” Benji ran a hand over his face at the fact they were failing at lying and making things a mess. “I’ll explain later. Do we have everything we need or are there more questions?” Benji asked and looked Ethan with a pleading look hoping he’d go along with the plan.
Ethan took a deep breath and pulled any annoyance that showed in his face off and nodded. “We’re done here. Thanks for the help.” He said to Charlotte as he headed out of the house first not even holding the door open as Benji followed behind not saying bye or anything to Charlotte too caught up in this. “When we get back I want you to explain everything to me. I want the truth.” Ethan said, letting annoyance drip into his tone.
Luther drove to the safe house they were staying in and the drive was mostly silent. “I can't believe you didn’t mention you know her.. I could’ve gone to your place to make it safer.” He said as he parked and headed inside first.
Ethan got out and needed to the door but kept a slower pace for Benji to catch up behind him. “Bedroom. Now.” He said in a way that felt like a demand or an order. Benji signed and followed and headed to the bedroom and shut the door behind the two of them. They took their earpieces out and shut them off. “I can not believe you did that. You lied, you risked so much. She knows we work for some sort of organization and knows you. We’re meant to stay in the shadows, our jobs unknown to normal average people. When I was with Julia she didn’t even know what I did. I lied to everyone to keep them and myself and the IMF safe. You just jeopardized all of us and the mission!” Ethan expressed how he felt and came off to Benji as being very ticked off.
Benji stood frozen in place, his hand constantly rubbing the stuffed dino in his pocket as he tried to ground himself. “I didn’t.. I wasn’t thinking. I hadn’t meant to do that.” Benji tried to apologize and explain but Ethan cut him off.
“I am so disappointed in you. You may have just ruined this if she has any connection to anyone on this list. Did you know the others too? Are you just lying and risking everything now?” Ethan knew he was going overboard and being too mean but couldn't seem to stop the words from flowing out of him.
Benji stood there staring at Ethan trying not to let emotions overtake him but could feel the tears brimming in his eyes. “I swear.. didn’t mean to. I know of the family too but they don’t know of me, they’ve never met me. Only Charlie has and she won’t call or say anything. I promise you this will be mostly okay. The mission it’ll be fine. I may not end up fine but it's..It’ll be fine.” Benji said and stumbled over his words a little as his breathing felt off and he felt anxiety slipping in. “I can’t make it make sense just please, Ethan. Please trust me.” He pleaded and most likely looked like a sad puppy as he sniffled a little.
Ethan looked at him and bit his lightly feeling guilty about making his favorite person this upset but knew it was partially needed under this stressful so. “Make it make sense. How do you know her and how do you know the family? I feel like you owe me that at this rate and show me what’s in your pocket.” He said as he sat on the bed.
Benji moved and hesitantly sat next to him “I really don’t want to explain…This is a secret for a reason. It’s not like you explained the whole Julia situation to me. At least not till after Brandt told us a version of it that wasn’t accurate.” Benji said turning it onto Ethan which was a low blow but he wanted time to stall having explained.
“True, but I did eventually explain it. I never put anyone in jeopardy over it or risked a mission over it though. Plus it wasn’t like we had a lot of time to chat after the Russian prison and everything.” Ethan defended himself. “At least show me what’s in your pocket? I know it’s weird but your hands have been in there all day moving around. I just don’t trust anything right now unfortunately.” He said going the honest route.
“Fine…” Benji muttered and felt defeated but knew he needed to tell Ethan the truth or else he’d go mad feeling untrustworthy. He pulled a small green dinosaur stuffed animal out of his pocket and looked to Ethan for any reaction.
“Looks well loved..Where’d it come from?” He questioned and gently picked it up looking it over before handing it back. He wonders about the significance.
“So this is going to sound crazy at first but I think you’ll catch on quickly..I hope anyways. I am going to give you the full truth and you’ll be the only one to know it other than Charlotte.” He started and held the stuffed animal in his hand tightly as he rubbed his thumb back and forth in it. “This dinosaur is from the house we went to earlier… It’s mine from when I was little.” He started and paused for a moment watching Ethan look like he was trying to solve a complicated puzzle. He looked back down at the dino and continued. “I also took a Lego man as well but that's besides the point. They both were mine and I hadn’t seen either thing in 5 years and they were both inside Emily’s room.” He looked to Ethan again.
“I can speak over 10 languages, solve so many things, jump off planes, and yet I am very confused. So you were friends with her but then you’d said the family didn’t know you but Charlotte did. I don’t get..” Ethan cut himself off mid sentence thinking about it. “They don’t know you because you aren’t who you used to be, are you?” He asked, catching on.
Benji nodded and looked to Ethan “I am a trans man and I’ve been living stealth for years, no one knows. I have a whole new identity and have run away. I got caught hacking into the government's systems to change my gender marker and name and that’s sort of how the IMF found me.” He said and felt like a heavy weight was off his chest. “I’m sorry I’ve made the mission a mess and didn’t tell you. It’s not that I don't trust you, just that lots of people can be very closed minded and I don’t want anything to change around here. I’m sorry.” Benji apologized
“Don’t you dare apologize. I should be the one apologizing.” Ethan said before pulling Benji into a hug. “I’m sorry for pushing you to explain that but I’m glad you told me. Makes it all at least make sense now. I won’t ever treat you any differently. You’re Benji and always will be. Since you just told me that I guess I owe you a secret too?” Ethan questioned and was clearly trying to lighten the mood and be understanding now. “I am bisexual and you’re basically the only person that knows that, other than Julia who I didn’t even mean to tell, she figured it out somehow. So you’re the first person I’m choosing to tell.” He said.
“I’m glad I told you. It’s nice to have someone so important to know and understand it. As for you being bi, I totally understand Julia finding out because I pegged it too, mate. It’s just this weird aura that some people have I guess. Anyway we should probably start to debrief today and go over tomorrow with the team before going to sleep. It’s late.” Benji said and they went and quickly decided before heading to their separate beds. They slept till the next morning when the alarms went off signaling that they had two hours to get ready.