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Karlach felt like she was going to be sick. How could she have let something like this happen?
It had only took one moment for them to get separated from Shadowheart and Lae'zel. She obviously hadn't minded being alone with Astarion, even if it was in the middle of the barren wastes of the Shadow cursed lands. She had briefly spared a worried taught to the fact that the other two might actually kill each other, but she had quickly dismissed it.
Together with Astarion, they had quickly planned a route back to the Last Light Inn and had set off on it. She doesn't remember what they had been talking about now, only that she greatly enjoyed the conversation.
Maybe that's why neither of them noticed the ambush.
Karlach is sure one of the others had told her the name of the plant monsters twisted by the Shadow-Curse, probably Halsin or Gale, but she could not give less of a fuck to try and remember what they're called.
Not now, not when Astarion is half sitting, half laying at her feet, bleeding, piece of wood so thick she guesses she could only about wrap her hand around it sticking out of his stomach.
And she can do nothing to help him. Not without burning him.
That's why they set out into the Shadow-Cursed-Lands that morning in the first place, to find Infernal Iron to hopefully cool down her out of control heart.
Crouching down next to Astarion, ignoring the way her own body aches, Karlach cringes as she gets a better look at the state Astarion is in.
The jagged piece of wood sticking out of his left side tore right through his armour, leaving an equally jagged hole in the leather, and surely his skin too. His armour is dark, of drow making, but she could see the blood running across it from the wound all too clearly from the way the liquid glints in the unnatural pale blue light of the Shadow-Cursed-Lands. His jaw is clenched, eyebrows furrowed, but somehow, he's still trying to throw her a alluring smile.
Normally a look like that would make Karlach feel a whole host of ways.
Now, pained as it was, it just made her feel sad.
“Please, please tell me you have health potions on you.” Karlach says, trying to let the rising panic spill into her words.
“I was just about to ask you the same thing, darling.” Karlach had feared he'd say something like that. Astarion shifts to sit up better, a pained hiss leaves his mouth despite the way he clenches his teeth, eyes pressed shut tightly, brows drawn together.
There were many times Karlach had wanted desperately to touch Astarion.
When he'd propositioned her at the tiefling party, every time she wanted to kiss that smug grin he had after battle or cracking a lock off his face, when they sat around the fire at camp close enough for her to have simply reached over and wrapped her arm around him. Hells, every single night she wished she could spend it with him pressed tightly to her chest.
She'd never wanted to be able to touch him more then now. If she could only pick him up, they'd be back at the inn in no time. It's now like he's heavy. But no, she couldn't even hold his hand without making things so much worse. Astarion starts moving again, clearly trying to stand up. And I can do nothing but watch, Karlach thinks.
“Shit fangs, you're loosing so much blood.”Karlach swallows thickly as she watches a fresh rivulet of it run out of the wounds and across Astarions thigh. Astarion laughs, and action he clearly regrets immediately as he stops and clutches the wound in his stomach by wrapping his hand around the piece of wood.
“I'm a vampire, Karlach. Bleeding out won't kill me.”
“You can still die from an injury that bad!” Karlach says, barely quieter than yelling. She hates the way her voice cracks. Loosing her cool now is not an option. Astarion makes it to his feet, immediately stumbling and having to lean against a tree. He's breathing heavily and doubled over. Karlach thinks he might be sick.
“Fuck, are you okay?” Karlach hurries to get up too and stands next to him, hand hovering just shy of touching his shoulder. He nods. Karlach isn't sure she believes him.
After what feels like ages, Astarion starts walking, and Karlach feels a bit sick herself.
He sways with every step he takes. Going by the limp he's got going, there's also something very clearly wrong with his leg. It hurts Karlachs heart watching him like this. But the worst of it is without a doubt the noises he makes.
It's the kind of thing Astarion is good at, something Karlach had already sworn she'd make Cazador pay for. Despite Astarions clear skill in the territory, the dead silence of the Shadow-Cursed-Lands is near continuously pierced by hisses and groans. Occasionally he even makes noises that are just barely not screams. Those chill Karlach to the bone.
When Astarion almost stumbles every other step, Karlach almost grabs him every time. She can't even steady him for fear fear of hurting him worse.
Karlach has to force herself to look away from Astarion to make sure they're still going the right way. Thankfully, the dome encasing the Last Light inn is already in sight, and slowly but steadily growing closer.
“Look Astarion! I can see the inn from here.” He doesn't look, too focused on watching the floor in front of him. Karlach hadn't expected him to look, but his lack of answer beside a weak nod unnerve her. Astarion is nothing if not talkative, him not speaking sat wrong with Karlach.
A few steps later, Astarion falls to his knees.
“Shit.” Karlach mutters to herself, dropping down next to him as well, bruised knees be damned. His eyes are half closed as he looks in her direction. They're unfocused and his expression looks distant. Karlach can't be sure Astarion can see her at all.
“Astarion!” Karlach exclaims, snapping her fingers in front of his face. “Please get back up. You have to get up Astarion!” Desperation and panic lace her every word.
This seems to snap Astarion out of it, and he struggles to get back to his feet. He's fatigued, it's painfully obvious from the way he moves.
“If I do pass out, you'll have to carry me back.” His vice is breathy and tight. It's clear he has to force himself to speak at all.
“I can't carry you back, I'll burn you!” Karlach says, sounding angrier than intended.
“Well I'd rather you burn me than leave me out here!” Astarion hisses back. Karlachs stomach drops. Does he really think she'd do that?
“I'd never leave you behind Astarion, especially not when you're like this.” Karlach tries her best to keep her voice calm and level. Astarion nods.
They're only around a 150 meters away from the dome when Astarion makes good on what he said and finally passes out. He does so so fast Karlach doesn't even have the time to want to try and steady him out of instinct. At least he has to good foresight to not fall forwards, instead landing on his uninjured side.
Fear grips Karlachs heart as Astarion refuses to wake back up again no matter how loud she gets. Nobody at the Inn could hear her calling for help from here, she's sure of it. And there's no way she'd leaving Astarion alone.
That really only leaves her with one option: Touching him.
Sure, she could find a way to drag him without touching him if she had the time, but she doesn't. And dragging him across such uneven ground in this state sounds dangerous.
“I'm so sorry Astarion.” Karlach says and scoops him up, one arm in the crook of his knees, the other across his back. She takes care to try and hold him as far away from his chest as she can. Karlach as fast as she safely can towards the bridge leading to the inn. For a moment, a traitorous little part of her almost feels joy at finally, finally getting to hold Astarion, at the way his unnaturally cool skin feels against hers.
It is almost immediately squashed an replaced by guilt as the smell of burning flesh hits her.
As soon as she crosses the threshold of the dome, Karlach puts Astarion down, apologizing once more as she does so, and begins yelling for Shadowheart or Halsin or anyone that can help.
Thankfully, Halsin appears fast, and Shadowheart follows shortly after. Karlach is predominantly focused on Astarion, but she does notice that Shadowheart looks rather beat up herself. Karlach tries to explain what happened, but it doesn't come out very coherent.
The two healers move quickly. They move Astarion into the inn, where it's cleaner. Karlach follows closely behind. They end up having to pull the piece of wood out before removing Astarions armour. Luckily, healing magic doesn't rely on them seeing what the injury looks like.
When the armour and shirt come off and Karlach catches sight of the ugly burn across Astarions back, she has to leave the room. Gods she hates how even when trying to help she causes damage.
The next time she sees Astarion is when he's been moved back to the camp and into his own tent. What Shadowheart and Halsin couldn't heal has been bandaged. Astarion looks almost peaceful now.
Karlach sits next to where he rests, making sure not to set anything on fire, and keeps watch of him. It's all she can do without hurting Astarion, so she's dedicated to at least do that well.
When he wakes up, Karlach apologizes a third time. Astarion waves it off.
“Once I get this engine of mine fixed, I'm hugging you so tightly. That's a threat and a promise.” Karlach states. Astarion laughs quietly, but says nothing. It's obvious he's still hurting but trying to hide it.
Karlach gets it. After all, they both come from places where showing weakness was not an option. Karlach sighs.
When Astarion settles to trance, Karlach doesn't even try to sleep. She'll keep watch just a little while longer, just to make sure. Just to make sure Astarion can rest easy.