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“Alright, you’re free to wander as you wish,” Lila said from the counter of the tiny kitchen of her ship, where her crew had gathered for breakfast. “But we are leaving at nightfall, so beware.”
“Nice of you to let us have fun, Captain,” said her first mate. “And in my hometown no less. Admit it, you did it for me when I told ya that I missed my family.”
Lila rolled her eyes and sighed. “Get up and enjoy the day out, Stross,” she looked at the others. “Go, just go. Before I change my mind.”
They had docked in Besa Nal, and Lila remembered it was Stross’ hometown, but of course she didn’t decide to stop there because of that. This port city happened to be in the itinerary, and a port was as good as any. She just wanted to take a break, that was all. There wasn’t any reason, that today of all days… Right .
Stross chuckled at his captain before leaving, and the other crew members followed him soon and promised to respect the curfew. They usually did, which made Lila proud of herself.
When she had embarked on this new journey, she’d been afraid that her crew wouldn’t listen to her orders. But they proved to be loyal and trustworthy, and this would’ve made her tear up if she was more of the emotional type. They deserved this free day after a week out at sea. It would be her gift to her ship’s company, but mostly to herself. She liked each member of her crew enough, but there was somebody she cherished more than everyone combined.
Lila glanced at him. He had stayed in the kitchen after everyone had left, just as she had expected. Just as she had hoped.
Kell was a special member of her crew. He helped with the Grey Barron’s affairs and tried to blend in with the others, but anyone could see that he sometimes felt like he didn’t truly belong there, even though years of training had made him rougher than he used to be, and able to blend with the humble people in her little crew.
He was still a prince, but he was also a privateer, and he was also in a complicated relationship with the captain.
When Kell rose from his seat and started walking away from the galley, Lila tugged at his sleeve.
“Are you going?”
“I wanted to get a hot drink,” he announced, and fixed his coat. “It’s frightfully cold on this ship.”
“Indeed,” she nodded. “Are you going now ?”
“Yeah. Better use this time to buy some things I might need,” he said. “I guess I’ll see you later? Before sundown?”
Lila frowned, and hoped he wouldn’t see the hurt in her eyes. “Or else we’ll leave you behind,” she sighed. “Alright, go. Just go. Time is ticking,” she mimicked the sound of a timer.
Perhaps she should’ve left before he did, so he would know she wasn’t minding this at all, but she waited. Waited for what? She didn’t know.
He looked one last time at her, offering her a bright and innocent grin before disappearing above.
She didn’t want to see him off, and she waited until she was sure he might have left the ship. Then she huffed at the empty vessel and slapped her forehead. Silly .
She went to the captain’s quarters and grabbed her coat. She wouldn’t stay here all alone on this day. He didn’t even ask if I wanted to join him , she told herself, worrying her lip with her teeth. You could have asked him , another voice interjected. Next time, then. Next year.
Outside, it was just worse than the ship. This place had already been kissed by the chilly winter, and Lila hated that her coat didn’t have fur. A coat. I could buy a coat. And mittens, she thought to herself. I deserve it. I deserved it because – “Kell?”
He sat on a mooring bitt on the quay, arms crossed on his chest. He beamed at her when she called his name, and stood up to greet her. “Wasn’t time ticking?” he inquired, but Lila glared at him.
“I thought you’d left ages ago,” she tried to sound annoyed, as if he had just ruined her plans. He did not.
“I thought you’d come down sooner,” he rubbed his hands together. She noticed that he wasn’t wearing any mittens today. “My fingers turned to ice waiting for you.”
“You were waiting for me,” she mumbled, and her features softened.
“Of course I was,” he motioned for her to follow him. “We are going on a date.”
“We’re doing what?”
Now that she wasn’t expecting at all.
He chuckled and grabbed her hand. “Your hands are criminally colder than mine,” he ignored her, and put their entwined hands into the pocket of his coat, which was lined with fur. It was cozy.
The inside of his coat was warm and Lila grinned. His hand was also not that cold as he had claimed. Fucking liar. Give it to Kell to look after her. She loved him so much and he just knew what she needed, even when she didn’t say it openly.
“That is so sweet,” she remarked. “Perhaps my blood rushed all to my head when I heard that we were going on a date.”
“Highly doubt it,” he raised an eyebrow. “You wanted us to go on a date today.”
“Me?” she tried to seem affronted. “And why would you think that?”
“Yeah, why would I think that,” he laughed softly. “Just accept it already.”
“You were ready to spend the day without me,” she said. “You didn’t even ask if I wanted to come with you.”
“You could have asked me,” he insisted. “I am not a mind reader, Lila,” he shrugged.
She sighed. Yeah, I figured as much . She didn’t reply, and they kept moving through the crowd. She had no idea where they were going, but he must have, because he stopped in front of a tavern.
“Hungry?”
“Famished,” Lila confessed.
“We need something warm,” he suggested, and she followed him inside.
He freed their hands from the pocket of his coat, but he didn’t let go. The tavern was not as crowded as she had expected, but that didn’t bother her like once upon a time, where she sought a place to hide. She still wanted to pass unobserved, a shadow who was here one minute, and gone the next. A ghost. While she was still a thief at heart, she had also acquired a respectable status. She didn’t feel like hiding in plain sight anymore, but old habits die hard.
“Is this place to your liking, Captain?” Kell wondered, stopping at a corner table in the quieter place of the tavern. The spot she would have chosen if he had asked her.
“Anywhere is fine,” she assured him, a smile tugging at her lips.
He let her sit first and then he sat down beside her on the bench. A waitress came to their table to ask for their orders, and Lila caught her staring at Kell.
It annoyed her, but she couldn’t blind the woman. After all, she also had eyes, and he surely caught a lot of stares. He was like a flame in the dead of the night. He attracted all kinds of prey who wanted to get close to the fire to warm up their bones in a chilly night, unaware of the danger looming in the dark, where people like her would rather stand and watch and wait for the right moment to attack.
“Anything you want in particular?” he asked her.
“I’ll get the homemade broth, whatever that is,” she replied nonchalantly.
Kell agreed with her, and the waitress took their orders. She batted her lashes at them before scurrying back to the counter.
“I’ll be back,” Kell stood up after the girl was gone. He didn’t tell her where he went, and she assumed he needed the bathroom.
Lila sighed, and crossed her arms on her chest. He still hadn’t come back when their beverages arrived, and she began drinking hers. She was thirsty and cold. Where was he? Was he sick? Was he robbed? Was he secretly – don’t be an idiot . While she scoffed at herself and at her loneliness, he came back. It was the second time that day.
“Apologies,” he said. “Is this good?”
“Not by a long shot,” she shrugged, drowning more of whatever concoction the waiter had brought them. “It tastes like the smell of soil after rain.”
“That sounds awful,” he took a sip and made a face. “It is awful.”
“At least it’s hot,” she said. “My hands warmed up while I waited for you.”
He ignored her, and kept drinking despite clearly not enjoying that at all. In the meantime, the waitress arrived with their broth.
Lila fixed her gaze on the woman, following her every move. She realized her eyes were on her, and the waitress winked at her before she turned her back to leave. She was baffled, and she clenched her fists instinctively. She felt sort of provoked, but truthfully, she had been the instigator.
“Aren’t you eating?” Kell wondered, and that was enough to distract her mind off the woman.
She nodded, and began sipping the soup. She had to admit it smelled good, and unlike the drink, it was actually tasty. “Doesn’t taste bad,” she confessed.
“I agree, but then again anything is better than what we eat on the ship.”
“You don’t have the luxury to eat nicely on a –” she halted, frowning at her plate. She put her hand in it thinking it had been a trick of the light, but she truly found something in the soup.
“What’s wrong?”
“Are you fucking kidding me?” she exclaimed. “There’s a pocket knife in my soup!”
She showed it to Kell, and he started laughing. “Did you argue with the waitress while I was away?”
“Believe it or not, I stayed put in my seat,” she snorted, cleaning the little knife on her coat. It wasn’t even ugly. It was a pretty damn knife. “Perhaps she wants to argue with me. We could talk outside, if she wants,” she tried to see where the woman was, but she couldn’t see her.
“Not everything has to turn into a fight.”
“It does if someone threatens me like this,” she rolled her eyes, irritated, and tried to stand up, but Kell pushed her down again. She let herself fall on the bench like a sack of potatoes.
“No one is threatening you,” he said sternly. “There she is, let’s ask her directly.”
He signaled the waitress and she walked to their table with a knowing smile. “I see you’ve found my beloved pocket knife,” she chirped.
“Did you put it here on purpose?” Lila asked aggressively.
She nodded. “You look like the type who likes pretty things,” she looked at Kell.
Lila stood, despite Kell tried to stop her again. She hated when people spoke about him as if he wasn’t a human being but a mere tool just because of his magic.
“Don’t you dare,” she said, opening the pocket knife as if it was a toy. She heard Kell say: ‘ it’s not worth it ’ and ‘ stop it ,’ and he stood up, but even he knew he was helpless when she was stubborn. “Do not even dare to glance in his direction.”
“Sweetie, I believe you misunderstood,” the waitress smirked at her, uncaring of Lila holding the small weapon menacingly. “This was my little gift for you because you caught my eye.”
“Unbelievable,” Lila grumbled.
She was about to tell the girl off, but Kell beat her to it. “Well, then, I regret to inform you that she isn’t available,” he spoke with a calm and cold tone that sounded final. It made Lila’s heart gallop in her chest.
“Oh, I imagined it,” she replied. “But I’m a girl who loves to try. You’re lucky,” she turned her back and started walking away. “You can keep the knife, by the way!”
“I would have kept it anyway,” Lila bellowed, and Kell couldn’t hide an entertained grin.
Having the waitress being attracted to you had its perks. Not only did she get Lila another broth, she also said she would put it on her tab to apologize for the trouble. Lila would have accepted without question in the past, but she refused even though she was tempted to say yes. Kell had also tried to pay, but with no luck. She would be treating him today.
“Are you cold?” he inquired once they were back on the streets.
He must have seen her hug herself, but she couldn’t help it. “That tavern was really comfortable, but the warmth is starting to wear off,” she said. “Can’t be helped.”
“Points of view,” he opened his arm, inviting her in. “Come here.”
She didn’t fight it, and went. He put his arm around her shoulder, and she felt much better after their bodies were so close.
Lila felt so at ease with him as they walked through the market and bought rolls of bread filled with cream because she was still hungry. He was a safe harbor in her life, and she was glad that he chose to stay and to travel the world with her. They talked about the next stop in their journey and laughed some more.
A stall selling clothes reminded Lila that she had had a goal in mind. “Let’s check that out,” she took his hand and dragged him there.
“Are you looking for something?” he asked.
“A new coat, just like yours,” she replied, and he frowned. “I meant with fur, not a magical coat.”
“This one isn’t fit for cold weather,” he remarked. “Why don’t you try this?”
He picked a black coat with black fur that looked like a crow’s feathers. “You say you aren’t a mind reader, but that’s exactly what I had in mind.”
She grabbed the coat from his hands. There was a hint of a smile on his face, and a hint of red on his cheeks. She tried it on, and it fit so well she couldn’t hide a squeal when she glanced at her reflection in the big mirror. She had noticed him disappearing somewhere as she did so. This was the third time today, and she wanted to roll her eyes, but she let it go.
“It fits like a glove,” Kell finally reappeared. He gave her an appreciative glance and she couldn’t help but smile. “I think you should take it.”
“You think?” she looked at herself. The coat was so comfy, and most of all, it was warm, which was the point of needing a new one. “Where’s the vendor?”
“We don’t need to look for the vendor,” he said, surprising her. “We should just go.”
Lila thought it was odd for him to propose something like that. Theft . Kell was a fair person, he always played by the rules. And, most of all, he always paid his debts. He always paid, period.
The idea of nicking the coat was alluring, and she felt her heart quicken at the prospect of having a little fun. It made her think of her past, but in a sentimental way. She was in a better place now, but still, she hadn’t completely let go of the idea of taking what she wanted, purely because she knew she could do so. And she wanted this beautiful black coat. She could have paid for it, but… It was more thrilling because Kell was the one to suggest it.
It wouldn’t hurt to be the old Lila for once.
She grabbed Kell’s hand, and he just knew what they were about to do.
They didn’t sprint out of the stall, of course. That would have attracted a crowd, and they needed to be as quiet and ghostly as possible.
Lila had taught Kell how not to make any sound, how to walk like she did, and he had been a stubborn and discouraged student at first, but he had eventually mastered the art of being a living shadow.
Shadows didn’t talk, thus their eyes spoke for them. She was incredibly proud and ecstatic when he just knew what she wanted, where she wanted it, and how. He had become good at reading the parts of her that she had kept hidden to everyone else. He just knew what she was thinking about, not only emotionally, but also physically. He had truly become her partner in crime, and the thought sometimes scared her. He was part of her. Her equal, her other head and limbs. He fit her.
And so, when they managed to leave the clothing stall behind them and were safe in the cocoon of a dark alley, she pressed his body gently to the stone wall and kissed him.
“You were right about the coat,” her voice was raspy afterwards. “It truly fits like a glove.”
“Like your lips over mine,” he replied mellowly.
Lila blushed, releasing his coat. All of you fit me like a glove , she thought, but she didn’t dare to say it. Instead, she said: “The sun is setting.”
He looked up, and saw the orange sky looming above them. “So what? You are the captain, you are allowed to be late.”
“Yes, I am,” she declared proudly. “And it’s because I’m the captain that I shall be there before they all return.”
Sometimes she was annoyed at how becoming a captain changed the way she behaved, but it was true. Her crew was loyal to her, she was sure of it. But she still wanted them not to question her authority, even so –
Kell raised an eyebrow. “What?”
“It’s your birthday today.”
She tried not to show her surprise, and sighed. “But they don’t know,” she said, as if it would justify it. I thought you also forgot about it , she thought.
“Don’t you want them to know?” he wondered. “They would understand. That’s why you also let them have this day off, after all.”
“How did you –” she shook her head. She wasn’t even shocked anymore about how he seemed to know a lot about her. “I don’t know.”
“They respect you, Lila. And so do I. For what it’s worth, I think command suits you.”
“Do you really believe so?”
“Why wouldn’t you believe it?” he cupped her cheek in his hand. “You’re the most powerful and capable person I know.”
That made her giddy. Of course, she knew she was good. She considered herself powerful enough to conquer the world. She didn’t need other people’s approval to know her skills, but he wasn’t a stranger. She loved him, and she valued his opinion. You were more powerful when someone you loved believed in you.
Lila decided to let herself have a little more fun with Kell in the city. They bought more of those delicious rolls with cream and looked around. They returned to the ship a little after the sun had set, and the crew was where they had left her that morning.
“We thought someone had kidnapped you, captain,” Vasry said. “I was right. Pay up, you guys,” he ordered the others, and they reluctantly gave him money.
She giggled and looked at Kell, and he was smiling too. A glance of acknowledgment passed between them, and was enough to let Lila know that he found the idea of being her thief amusing. And it wasn’t wrong. He was the only one who could steal her heart.
“Did you eat?” she wondered, seeing that the table was empty.
“Thought it would be nice to wait for you,” Tav said. “We prepared the sails in the meantime. To set sail tomorrow at dawn.”
“You did well,” she managed another smile. “Now eat before you get all grumpy and blame it on me while I’m not around.”
“Alright, captain,” Vasry agreed. “Have a good night.”
“Don’t bet too much on me,” she warned. “I hate to be predictable.” She heard someone say she would incinerate them if they did. Better let them think this , she thought, even if she knew they were joking.
Kell walked with her to her quarters, and she was glad that he followed her in her room instead of turning right to go to his. He turned on the fire into the little stove by the bed, and the room was filled with crackling noises and an orange-red glow.
She went by the little stove to warm her hands, and she felt him beside her.
“Did you enjoy our date?”
“More than I imagined,” she confessed. “But I hated the cold.”
She felt his hands on her waist. He hugged her from behind, and she felt his hot breath on the side of her face. It felt so nice to stay like this. She put her hand over his.
“More than the waitress?”
“Can’t hate that one,” she chuckled. “She got me a nice pocket knife.”
“So she’s forgiven because she got you something,” he said. “You’re easy to corrupt.”
“Only when it comes to things I like. A nice knife, a hot meal, a warm coat.”
“You paid for the broth,” he reminded her.
“You paid for the coat.”
He sighed, but didn’t deny it. “I wanted to give you something for your birthday,” he said. “You are sensitive to the cold.”
“I very much am,” she admitted, feeling her cheeks warm but not because of the little fire. “I’m never going to take it off.”
It was her way to thank him, and he knew it. “Don’t mention it,” he said, and kissed her cheek.
A few hours later, after the fire had ceased to burn in the small stove, Lila felt blessed in Kell’s arms. The cot in her room was bigger than his, but she didn’t mind sharing her space with him. She hadn’t taken off the coat when they crawled under the quilt, and she didn’t lie when she said she wouldn’t take it off anytime soon – unless until they reached a warmer place, that is.
The thought of what had happened on that day was still fresh, and it made her smile like an idiot.
“Happy birthday, my love,” he had whispered into her hair at some point, and she had melted into his arms.
She was so happy to have him, so happy to be with him. His presence and his love were the best gifts she could ever ask for.
He was probably resting, because he hadn’t moved for a while. Perhaps she should try to do the same. She closed her eyes, letting his arms carry her into the world of sleep, glad that this wasn’t a dream.