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"Did you know it takes way longer to drive across the state of California than it does to get from Mirinoi to KO-35?" Ashley relayed the information with an incredulous little shake of her head. "Or from Earth to KO-35, for that matter."
"California," Karone murmured to Andros, beside her at the kitchen table. It was a place her teammates spoke of from time to time; she and Maya would look at each other and shrug. She'd never paid much attention to Earth geography.
"Angel Grove is a city in California," he answered in a low voice. To Ashley, he said, "And that's because Earth—"
"Is primitive and inefficient, unlike the rest of the rest of the civilized galaxy?"
"I didn't say that."
"You haven't said that recently." She hopped up from her seat and whisked all of their empty plates away to the sink, then came around to kiss his temple. "Love you. Love you," she said to Karone, leaning down to give her a one-armed hug. "You guys have fun this afternoon."
"Love you," Andros echoed quietly, and his eyes followed her until she left the room.
"Where's she going?"
"She and Zhane are doing… something." He shrugged. "They said they'll be back for dinner."
"Oh." Something had shifted in their household recently—Andros was never very forthcoming about these matters to begin with, but Ashley and Zhane had been more closed-mouthed than usual. She had her suspicions, though. "So what do you want to do?"
"We could go for a walk," he said, frowning when she smiled. "What?"
"You always say that," she told him. He liked to show her the sights, tell her everything he knew about their homeworld.
"We don't have to," he said.
"No," she said. She was in the mood for it. "Let's go."
Andros always hoped that these excursions would help her remember. Karone didn't tell him so, because she didn't want to get his hopes up, but she always hoped so too. There were times, when she closed her eyes and let his voice wash over her, when she could almost believe that she was remembering.
It was a brisk fall day, wind whipping around them and purple leaves fluttering to the ground. Mirinoi was almost always warmer, and it was summer right now anyway. She'd come prepared and brought a coat. Andros was dressed in only jeans and a long-sleeved shirt, which was funny given what she thought was his general disdain for most things Earth-related.
"I don't hate Earth," he said, when she commented on it. "It really is beautiful."
"I never got to see much of it," she admitted.
"I'll show you sometime," he offered, then laughed at himself. "Ashley would think that's funny."
"What, you being my Earth tour guide?"
"Yeah." He shrugged, hands in his pockets as they walked side-by-side towards downtown. "There's some beaches there—not like the ones in Angel Grove where it's warm and there's all of those people, but if you go north for awhile, everything there feels… different. A little wild. We had to teleport there, though, because Ashley said it would've taken twelve hours to drive there."
"They really aren't efficient, are they," she said. "It's like that on Mirinoi too—they're just so… chaotic. I always worry the Mirinoians will regret taking us in."
"Yeah," Andros said. "But whenever I say anything about Earth, suddenly everyone gets so protective of it."
"Well," Karone said, considering. "I guess they did hold off Dark Specter somehow. Better than most places."
"There is that," Andros agreed quietly. "It's just so… big. I never really fit in there, and then afterwards, it was such a big deal that everyone knew who we were… I was so glad when Ashley agreed to give living on KO-35 a try."
"She seems happy here."
"I hope so." There was an odd note to his voice, and he was frowning..
"What?"
"It's nothing," he said, and slowed, pointing to a building on their right. "This one's abandoned, but there's a great view of the city from the roof."
It was a great view. Perhaps not a great enough view to warrant the fifteen flights of stairs they had to climb to reach it. Her legs were like jelly once they finally cleared the final landing. There was a low wall built along the roof, and Andros leaned over it, pointing. "That's our house over there," he said. "I want to move outside of town eventually, but it's… nice enough."
Karone stepped up beside him, gripping the edge of the wall. She looked to where he pointed, then stared straight ahead. The sun was behind them, and she had a clear view of the entire city. That curious pyramid building was to her right with the rest of the downtown area; the park was to her left. Straight ahead were mostly residential areas, and beyond that, an expanse of sky and forest.
She wondered if he'd take her there, later. She found that she liked being out in nature on Mirinoi—a marked change from her life spent mostly in space.
Andros pointed out a few more sights, then lapsed into silence. She caught him watching her a moment later.
"What?"
"I'm sorry," Andros said. "I don't mean to stare. I'm just happy you're here."
Karone narrowed her eyes, and he fidgeted under her scrutiny.
"It's just—" He looked straight ahead, avoiding her eyes. "You look like Mom."
"Oh."
"I'm sorry," he said again. "I know you probably don't want to talk about it."
"Does it bother you?" she asked him, after a pause. He stared at her, uncomprehending, and she clarified. "Does it bother you that I look like her?"
"No!" he said instantly. "That would never bother me."
He would've told her if there had been any news of their parents. He hadn't shared anything, so she hadn't asked. They both knew what that meant.
"I know you were close to her."
Andros had talked to her for hours upon hours, those few weeks she'd spent with him on the Megaship after she'd defected from her place in Dark Specter's army. He'd told her what he remembered of their childhood together, and of the years after. He spoke of Zhane and becoming a Ranger, of leaving KO-35, of everything that he could remember about their parents. They'd been good parents. They'd loved Andros fiercely, and, if her own fuzzy memories could be trusted, her as well.
"Yeah." Andros swallowed. His voice was soft as he said, "It's… nice, to see her face again."
There was another little silence. "I wish I could see them one more time," he said. "Just to tell them you're okay. They'd be so proud of you."
"Do you think so?" It meant more to her than she thought it should've, the idea that she had become someone that parents could be proud of.
"Of course they would," Andros said. "I'm proud of you too."
That made her smile.
Karone hadn't planned on telling him, but something in the tentative way that he smiled back at her changed her mind. She leaned forward, bracing herself against the ledge as she stared out over the city. It had changed since the last time she'd been here—some of the rubble had been cleared away, and new buildings had popped up.
"I've been having dreams," she said. "About us, when we were kids."
"Really?"
He looked so hopeful that she had to add, "I don't know if they're real, Andros. They're dreams."
"Tell me." Andros caught himself before she could answer. "I mean, you can tell me about them if you want to."
She didn't answer right away.
"I'm sorry," he said, misreading her silence. "I don't mean to make you uncomfortable or feel… pressured, or…" He shrugged, his expression terribly sad. "I don't want you to tell me anything you don't want to, no matter how I seem, okay? I just—I always hope that you'll remember."
"You're an optimist," she said, amused.
"I guess so." He sounded a little startled at the realization.
"Do you want to know?" she asked.
"Please," he said, so eagerly that she worried about how hard the disappointment would hit him when he realized it meant nothing.
"We're at the beach, I think," she said, closing her eyes to try and summon the images that were so elusive during waking hours. "Maybe a lake, but there's so much water. It's sunny, and there's someone holding my hand."
"How old are we?"
"I don't know," she said. "Little, I think. Whoever's with me feels… big."
"I don't remember this," Andros said, sounding almost apologetic. "But there used to be pictures of all of us in swimsuits. We were really little, like two or three, and we were visiting our aunt in Tarth. That's a city," he added, like he hadn't suddenly just sprung on her the idea of extended family. "About an hour south of here by train, it's—"
"We have an aunt?"
"Oh," Andros said. "Yeah."
"What was her name?"
"Irini," he said. "She was Dad's younger sister. Mom's sister was Kateri."
Karone swallowed. "And none of them…?"
Wordlessly, Andros shook his head.
"I'm sorry."
"I didn't know any of them well."
"Because of being a Ranger?"
"Partly," he admitted. "Zhane and I didn't have a lot of free time, but I don't think their families liked each other very much in the first place."
"Why?"
"They never told me this. That's just what I think. Neither of their families are in their wedding pictures." He shrugged. "I think that's why it was so important to them that you and I looked out for each other."
"I know you must've," she said. It went to the core of who he was. "Did I?"
"Yeah," he said, and surprised her by grinning. "One time at the park, some girl stole my shovel. You stole it back and hit her in the head with it."
Karone smiled too, laughing at the scene he described, but her skin prickled with an eerie sense of familiarity.
"It feels—when you talk, it feels like my dreams," she said. "It feels so familiar, but I don't actually remember."
"Me too, sometimes." Andros looked down. "I wish I had the pictures. Mom had all them all packed with her things."
"What happened?"
"You were there." Andros winced, rushing to add, "I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I didn't mean—"
"I know," she said gently. "I mean, what happened to all of you? It sounds like they were supposed to leave with you?"
Andros turned so that his back was resting againt the ledge, arms folded across his chest. He gave her a tight nod.
"You don't have to talk about it." This was an interesting reversal of their usual roles.
"I want you to know." Andros slid down slowly until he was sitting, and drew his knees into his chest.
Karone dropped to sit beside him.
"Just—" He looked away. "Just ignore me when I cry, okay?"
"Okay," she said softly.
Andros took a breath. "I don't know how much you know. About what was happening on KO-35 at the time."
"Not much," she admitted. "I don't think Dark Specter wanted me to know, really."
"We knew we'd lost," he told her. "It was just me and Zhane, we couldn't stand against Dark Specter's entire army. We were just trying to buy enough time for everyone to evacuate."
Karone nodded. She did know that much. Even at the time, she'd wondered at that, at why Dark Specter would send such a force to a small border world.
"They were supposed to have left already," Andros said. "Mom and Dad. Zhane and I, we were gonna take the Megaship and keep fighting where we could. Most of our people were evacuating to Eltar. Mom and Dad were supposed to havegone with them, and we were going to meet them there."
"They didn't go?"
He shook his head, tilting his head back and blinking rapidly.
"I was scared," he confessed, and his voice cracked. "They stayed for me, and then they were supposed to take one of the last ships out."
She never actually saw him start to cry. He just blinked and his face was wet, the tears rolling slowly down his cheeks.
"The last time I saw them, they told me—they told me—" He swiped at his cheeks, then seemingly gave up. He lowered his chin to his knees. "Mom told me I was more than anything they'd known to wish for. Dad just told me that he loved me and that they would be waiting for me on Eltar."
"They didn't make it there."
"I don't know what happened." Andros took some deep breaths, exhaling slowly as he struggled to rein in his emotions. "I checked every time I was there, but I never..."
Karone started to reach for him, and caught herself with her hand hovering at his elbow. "Would it be okay," she asked quietly, "if I didn't ignore that you were crying?"
Andros hesitated, then nodded once. He let out a quiet, gasping breath when she touched him, a sound of grief and longing and emotions that she couldn't put into words, and when her arms went all the way around him, he sobbed aloud, pressing a fist to his mouth to muffle the sound.
He leaned against her shoulder. She tilted her head against his, saying nothing.
"I love you," he said. "You don't have to say it back. I just want you to know."
"I love you too," she said quietly. "I've loved you for awhile."
She thought he tried to laugh. He shook his head, and his voice was watery when he spoke again. "All this time, I've been worried you resented me."
"For what?" she asked, though she thought she knew what his answer would be.
"For pushing too hard." He sniffled and scrubbed his face with the edge of his sleeve. "For not understanding what you needed. For… being kind of a jerk."
"I was worried I disappointed you," she told him. "I don't remember the things you want me to remember."
"Never," he said. "You're your own person, even if I haven't always been great at remembering that. And you did it all on your own."
"I didn't, though," she said, nudging him. "I have Maya and Kendrix, and the rest of my team. And Zhane and Ashley and you."
He'd been kind of insufferable for a minute, true, but he'd promised her that he would be a better brother to her. He was nothing if not true to his word, even if it was difficult for him. So she respected him for that. And… honestly, he cut a pitiful figure at the moment, tearstained and sad. She couldn't have been angry with him now if she tried.
Not that she'd ever really been angry with him, she knew now. She'd just needed the space to find out who she was, and now that she knew that, she could come back to him. Even if she didn't live here. It was, after all, only a short flight to visit.
"It's hard to be mad at you when you look this sad," she teased him gently. She leaned over and kissed the side of his head impulsively, straightening up before he could say anything.
"Yeah." He gave her a wide-eyed look of surprise, but his tone was dry. "That gets me out of trouble a lot."
"Ashley?"
"Zhane too, sometimes."
That was as good an opening as any.
"Can I ask you something?" she asked. "About them."
He cringed, like he knew what was coming, but he nodded his head.
"Are all three of you lovers?" It was the only thing that explained their weird behavior lately.
His cheeks turned so red they were nearly purple, and even the tips of his ears turned pink. "You're my sister," he said. "I can't tell you that."
Karone couldn't help it. She laughed, and his scandalized expression only made her laugh harder. For a moment, she worried she would hurt his feelings, but when he looked down, she saw he was trying to hide a smile.
"They make fun of me all the time too." He sounded resigned. "Don't tell them I like it."
"I won't," she promised, touched by his trust. "So… that was a yes?"
"Not… exactly," he said, after a pause. "Zhane and Ashley aren't really together. I didn't not tell you because it's a secret, it's just… new, and… I don't know."
"Are you happy?"
"Yes," he said, but he was frowning.
"So… what's the matter?"
"It scares me," he admitted, staring at his hands. "I feel like if I get too happy, one of them will leave. Probably Ashley."
"Why?"
"Most people on Earth prefer one gender over the other," he said. "I don't know if you've noticed."
"Not all of them, though," she said. Kendrix didn't. Maybe not Leo either, but she'd never asked.
"No," Andros said, shrugging again. "Just most of them."
"Ashley prefers men?" Karone considered that, frowning when he nodded. "I don't see the problem there. There's two of you."
"Most people on Earth are also—I don't know the word for it, but they're exclusive. They only have one relationship at a time."
"Monogamy," she told him.
He didn't ask how she knew that.
"So." His frown deepened. "I'm worried that she'll decide this is too much for her, and change her mind and go back to Earth and never want to see me again."
Andros never talked to her like this, never shared all of his worries and insecurities. Karone liked him so much better this way.
"You should have more faith in her than that," she said. "We talk about you all the time, and she never sounds like she wants to leave you."
"You… do?" Andros looked downright alarmed at that information. "What else do you talk about?"
"And when we talk about relationships," she went on, deliberately leaving that question unanswered, "she never sounds like she thinks Maya should choose between me and Kendrix."
Andros stared at her.
Karone stared back, daring him to say something.
"Are you happy?"
He'd finally gotten the question right. Karone smiled, edging a little closer to him. He was freezing, she realized, and hadn't said a word. She tilted her head against his shoulder.
"Yeah," she said softly. "I'm happy."
"Good," he said. "Just… know that you'll always have a home with me. With us. If you need one."
"I know," she promised. "It's kind of funny, isn't it, that we're in the same situation?"
"Zhane thinks it's funny is that I'm the one who…" He flushed again, and quickly edited whatever he'd been about to say. "That I'm the one ended up in this situation."
"You didn't date much, huh?"
"I didn't date." Andros made a face at the word.
"Yeah," she said. "Me either. Except for Zhane, a few times. Is that weird?"
"Probably." He shrugged. "It usually turns out that weird is whatever I'm doing.."
"I don't think I prefer one gender over the other," she said. "I think I just prefer Maya and Kendrix."
"Yes." Andros sounded startled. "That's exactly what I said! I like Ashley. I like Zhane. I don't like other people. You're the first person I know who feels the same way."
And how many people had he really talked to about this, she wondered, but it obviously meant a lot to him that they had this in common. "We are a lot alike, aren't we?"
She'd wondered a lot at first, if there could be a mistake. If she was just some girl with a locket, and not his sister. The more time she spent with him, though, the more sure she was.
"Can I hug you?" Andros asked quietly.
She'd no sooner nodded than he'd wrapped her in a bear hug, like he was determined to fit thirteen years of lost hugs into this single embrace. She squeezed him hard, and he buried his face in her shoulder. His cheek was ice cold against her neck.
"You're freezing," she said. "We should go back."
"One minute," he said quietly. "Please."
"Okay," she agreed, even as she felt him shivering against her. "One minute."