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"It's got to be Hymeno."
"Nah. My bet's on Jeramie."
"What? That two-thousand-year-old guy? How would that even work?"
"With digital storytelling and a lot of teasing both in and out of bed, that's how."
"Really? But does our Prez even like Jeramie?"
"At least he can talk to him. The guy gets so tongue-tied with Hymeno, he'll never make a move!"
"Of course not! That's why I think that she is going to make a move on him."
"You're both wrong. It's absolutely gonna be Yanma and Rita. Their rivalry's gonna end up with them in bed together sooner or later. You can take my word on it."
Shiokara's eyebrows raised as he entered the room where his three friends were all arguing.
"Um, what's going on here, guys?"
As if on cue, Akka, Mayuta, and Usuba all looked up at him with expressions that ranged from sheepish to excited.
"We've been setting up our betting pool."
Usuba groaned, turning off the projection screen they'd all been staring at. "You didn't have to tell him."
"Of course I did," Akka argued. "He's gonna know the answer before all of us. Who better to be arbiter?"
"Wait," Shiokara said. "What betting pool? What am I arbitrating?"
Mayuta sighed and flicked the projection screens back on, much to Usuba's chagrin.
"Well, we all love our Prez, right?"
"Yeah…" Shiokara agreed.
"And I think we can all agree that he's a bit hopeless with love, right?"
Shiokara winced. "That's putting it lightly…"
"And he's been spending a lot of time with the rulers of Chikyu's other nations, all of which are objectively really hot, right?"
"Why don't I think I'll like the direction where this is going…"
"Soooo… we're pretty sure he has a crush on at least one of them. And given time, and maybe a few pushes in this or that direction, we think our Prez is finally going to get himself laid."
"Or at least get himself a partner with whom he can be happy," Usuba hastily added. "I mean, we'd all be happy for him even if everything stayed above the waist and fully clothed, right?"
Mayuta rolled her eyes. "Or that. Right."
"We also have sub-bets as to who's going to make the first move, and how long it's going to take," Usuba added. "Most people seem to think that someone else is going to be the one to seduce, but I've got faith in our Prez."
"So what do you think, Shiokara?" Akka asked. "Are you game?"
Shiokara considered a minute, and sighed.
"Only if you let me bet on Gira making a move on Yanma."
All three of his friends shared near-identical grins.
"Yeah," Akka replied, as Usuba and Mayuta started typing in the appropriate details, "I think we can manage that."
"Congratulations, guys. We have over a thousand entries on our Prez Love Betting Pool!" Mayuta announced. She threw up a projection screen to show off the details, and Akka, Usuba, and Shiokara all gathered around.
Akka gave a slow whistle, and Usuba pushed up his glasses to get a better look.
"Wow. People really like our Prez, huh?"
"Of course they do!" Shiokara replied, puffing his chest out with pride. "And what's there not to love?"
"His pride."
"His arrogance."
"The fact that he doesn't know how to respond to any situation in a way that doesn't escalate it."
"Fair…" Shiokara deflated a bit. "But he's still our beloved prez, right?"
"Yeah!"
"Of course!"
"Exactly!"
"Anyway, what's trending?" Shiokara asked.
Mayuta opened up the stats page. "Weeelllllllllll… Gira's the most popular suitor, with Hymeno in a very close second. Jeramie and Rita are both holding their own a little lower, though everyone except a handful of Usubas seem pretty sure that Yanma's not gonna bother to make the first move." She scrolled down on the betting list and wrinkled her nose. "There's even sixty-seven votes for YanmaKagu or KaguYanma. What are they thinking?"
"That the dark horse'll probably pay big if it plays out at all," Akka replied with a shrug. "What I want to know is, if over a thousand people are taking part in this pool, how the heck does Yanma still not know about it?"
"Easy," Shiokara replied. "Yanma stopped searching up his own name online aaaaages ago."
"So do you think we'll ever see our Prez again?" Usuba asked.
"Of course," Mayuta replied. "Yanma's not gonna abandon us, right?"
"Right," Shiokara replied. "I don't know what happened, but given the fact that all the King-Ohgers disappeared at once, I do think something's up. And I'm sure they're fighting their way back to us right now, even as we speak."
"And if they're all together, then by the time they're back, they'll probably have had time for someone to make a move on Yanma, right?" Akka asked.
Shiokara groaned. "I sure hope so. Gira or otherwise"
"Guys!" Shiokara exclaimed. "I have an update!"
"On the Master Computer?" Usuba asked.
"Nah," Shiokara replied. "That's still…."
Akka cringed. "Don't say it. On ousting Hilbil?"
Shiokara winced. "I wish."
"On some sort of rebuilding strategy?" Mayuta attempted.
Shiokara shook his head. "Not that either."
Akka, Usuba, and Mayuta all shared a look. "What then?"
"The dating thing!!!!" Shiokara exclaimed. "You know, that betting pool you all wanted me to arbitrate? I finally have news on that front!"
In a flash, all three of them abandoned the hardware they were refurbishing to open every bit of the betting pool on the various available projector screens, asking a slew of questions as they did.
"So who's the lucky guy? Jeramie, right?"
"Clearly Yanma's the lucky guy. Because Hymeno finally bagged him, right?"
"I think you both mean that Rita finally served justice on his sexy, tight ass, right?"
Shiokara scratched the back of his head. "Well… actually…."
Akka stopped dead in his tracks and glared."You did not fix things and set him up with Gira."
"Of course not!" Shiokara promised.
Mayuta went pale. "It's… not Kaguragi, is it?"
"Not exactly…."
Mayuta's eyes narrowed. "What do you mean, 'not exactly'?"
Shiokara scratched the back of his neck. "Well… you see… he's kind of… with… all of them."
Akka frowned. "What do you mean, 'all of them'?"
"I mean… the entire group… all six of them… are kind of… together now?"
"Oh."
Usuba frowned, doing a quick search through the betting pool's admin interface. "I don't think anyone voted for that. Or rather, I don't think that we actually had the database set up in a way for anyone to even pick that as an option."
"What do we do, then?" Mayuta asked. "I mean, if it's an error that we didn't account for, we can't really say that anyone really won, or anyone really lost."
"Not to mention that everything to do with money transfer ha gotten a little weird since Hilbil," Akka added
Shiokara pursed his lips and considered for a moment. "Weeeelllllllllllll… we could offer people an option of refund or putting the money towards an eventual N'Kosopa rebuilding fund…"
Mayuta smiled. "I like it."
"Me too," Usuba added, already typing away at some new code.
"Me three," Akka agreed. "And, maybe we could even put a bit of it into a gift basket or something, to congratulate all of them on their new relationship. Or at least a letter to offer our country's collective support."
Shiokara smiled. "You know, that's not a bad idea. Not a bad idea at all."