Chapter Text
“Excited to see the fireworks, lass?”
“Nah, I think I’m gonna pass this year. I’m already tired.”
His eyes narrowed for a brief second and though he was sitting across the rec room, he saw it.
Saw something Soap didn’t.
The twitch of your eyebrow as you managed to stop it from moving further.
The attempt to curl your lips up into a smile that couldn’t reach your eyes.
The nail of your right thumb scratching and pinching the skin of your left thumb of your trembling hand.
He saw it.
Because he had been there a long time ago.
He remembered the feeling of the world crashing down on him, because his mind was stuck in an endless spiral that seemed to go down, dragging him to a place full of darkness.
The feeling, that nothing in this world could stop the pain that he felt.
Stuck in his own mind.
And he couldn’t let that happen to you.
Not to you, who’s bubbly and cheerful personality brought a piece of normality into the chaos that surrounded them.
Not to you, who’s laugh lifted up the weight on everyone’s shoulders as soon as their feet carried them back to base.
Simply not to you.
He waited until you got up and left the rec room, only to follow you shortly after.
With your mind already starting to go down that spiral, you didn’t notice that he was following you, until you tried to turn right, but his hand pushed you left.
He wasn’t looking at you, couldn’t bare to see the light already fading from your eyes. Couldn’t bare to see you breaking without giving him a chance to try.
All he could do, was pressing a quick “Come.” through his lips as his hand kept the pressure on your back.
You couldn’t run away, but you couldn’t show them what was happening inside of you. Not to you. Not him. “Ghost, I’m tired. I’d really like to go and-“
“Y/N, I wasn’t asking.”
Carefully pushing you further you quickly reached him own quarters,
Clean. Organized. Simple. Safe.
Quiet.
He slowly closed the door behind you and locked it, making sure that no one could be a witness of your weak state. Or that he cared.
“Sit.” He could already see your whole body trembling as the seconds passed by, only minutes until midnight as he gently pushed you towards his bed.
He didn’t care why or what brought you to this state. But he wanted to make sure that you weren’t alone. That you could feel safe and would come back out of the darkness without losing your light.
Your eyes glanced over towards the clock on his nightstand and your heartbeat skyrocketed. Already going down that spiral, your body tensed, your breath got shaky and your mind started to race.
Fear of something you couldn’t see.
Fear of something you couldn’t feel.
Fear of something that, by now, only existed in your mind.
Sitting down next to you, he reached out for your hand and slipped it under bis balaclava, pressing your index finger right on his pulse on his neck.
Steady. Calm. Warm.
Thud… Thud… Thud…
“Concentrate. Breathe.”
Thud... Thud… Thud…
“Listen. Feel.”
Chapter Text
Your hand was still trembling when he pressed your fingertips against his pulse, trying to get you calm by the steady feeling of the blood pumping through his veins.
“Ghost, I don’t think-“
“Shh. I said listen and feel. Concentrate on me, nothing else.”
His voice was low as usual, the deep graveling sound reverberated in your own chest and sent a wave of calmness through your body.
The more seconds ticked by, the more your mind and body were torn between breaking down and staying steady in this moment.
Your shaky voice followed a deep inhale, as if it took all of your strength to say that single word.
“Why?”
His hand found your other wrist, a warm and soft caress of his calloused hand you weren’t expecting and made you flinch until you realized it was just him.
“I know, I’m not the most comforting or calming person to be around. But I know how it feels. And you don’t deserve it.”
Your body melted under his touch and it didn’t get unnoticed. Just like the way your shoulders eased up a little as he spoke.
“I don’t care what happened to you and I will never ask you to tell me. Just know you don’t have to go through this, at least not alone.”
A second of silence followed before he took a deep breath and spoke again.
“You just need to concentrate on me, my voice, my breath, my heartbeat and my touch. Can you do this for me?”
Your hands continued to tremble as you heard the clock ticking, signalizing another passed minute.
“I don’t know.”
“Just try.”
You nodded softly, but the second the first single firecracker exploded in the cold air outside your whole body flinched. Your hand left his neck and found his chest, clinging on his shirt with the same urgency your fingers curled around his forearm.
“Just a firecracker.”
Another quick and desperate nod of your head followed his words, but your body was still tense. It got even worse, when the another screeching of a firecracker swung through the air of the dimly lit room.
His gaze moved to your fingertips which dug into the flesh of his forearm.
"Y/N. Look at me."
"I… Can't…"
A soft hum left his chest as his hands curled around your wrists, gently tightening their grasp around your delicate limbs. He lifted your arms, crossing them in front of your chest as he shifted on the bed, moving behind you and pulling you with him as he leaned his back against the wall.
With his knees lifted upwards, his feet on the bed right next to you, he gently pressed against your sides, keeping you in a soft yet tender embrace as his breath touched your neck. It provided a warmth, a hint of security your body and mind desperately craved for.
"What have you eaten today?"
"What?"
"You heard me. What have you eaten today?"
"I-I can't remember."
His thumbs started to draw circles on your skin, attempting so soothe your mind and give you another simple gesture to focus on.
"Try. I know you can. Breakfast?"
"Toast."
"How many?"
"Two."
"Good."
Another few firecrackers followed his words which drew his eyes towards the clock.
Less than a minute until midnight.
"Keep going. What follows breakfast?"
bang
"Y/N."
bang
"Lunch."
"What did you eat?"
bang
"Chicken."
bang
"With rice or noodles?"
bang
"With rice."
He pressed his legs against your body and tightened the grip on you, his head resting on your shoulder as the noises from outside began to get more frequent, soon leaving no room for a quick break.
"Dinner?"
"Didn't eat."
"You didn't?"
"No."
"Wanna eat something later?"
"Don't know."
"I could get us some pizza."
"Sounds good."
Your body was still tense, but it didn't get any worse. He couldn't deny the satisfaction about the strength you were showing, able to follow the casual conversation and remembering simple tasks.
"Could watch a movie."
"We could."
"Preferations?"
"Calm."
"Comedy?"
"Please."
Time kept ticking away without you noticing and all of a sudden, he went quiet. It wasn't until then, that you realized how tight yet gentle his grip around you was, how soft his thumbs brushed over your skin.
Your eyes dared a quick look towards the clock on his nightstand and slowly, your body joined your mind and calmed down.
00:31
"So, you still want pizza?"

vxivixx on Chapter 2 Tue 02 Jan 2024 12:23PM UTC
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That_one_demon12 on Chapter 2 Mon 12 Feb 2024 12:13AM UTC
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Lunar_Amethyst84312 (Guest) on Chapter 2 Fri 14 Nov 2025 11:09PM UTC
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Lunar_Amethyst84312 (Guest) on Chapter 2 Sun 16 Nov 2025 11:19PM UTC
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