Chapter Text
Minjeong has a secret—a generational secret passed down from women to women in the Kim family. Her grandmother had sons, and her dad had a son before Minjeong, and neither inherited the gift. Only the girls do and it landed on Minjeong.
Sweet young Minjeong, who thought the gift was the best thing in the world. She’d grasp onto her school friend’s hands as a small child and declare their future. When she got older, it seemed people believed her less and called her a fib.
When she was nine, she predicted someone’s death for the first time.
“Grandma!” Minjeong had rushed into her house and clambered onto her grandmother's bed. Her hair was a mess and she was sure there was still the fuzz of dandelions in her hair from rolling around in the grass of their backyard.
“Minjeong, dear.” Grandma chuckled lightly and pulled Minjeong onto her lap. “Do you want to see something?”
Minjeong nodded with a grin and her grandma took Minjeong’s small hand into hers and Minjeong’s world stopped for approximately five seconds—the average length of Minjeong’s visions.
It was quiet, and it smelt salty like she was at a beach. The sun was setting and her grandmother was sitting in a wheelchair with her family and other people Minjeong couldn’t recognise. She could hear the faint lulling of the ocean and then the scene stopped and Minjeong was pulled out and staring back into her grandmother’s eyes.
Her frail hand came to wipe at Minjeong’s cheek and Minjeong hadn’t realised she was crying.
“Grandma…” Minjeong blinked.
“Tell me about it, dear.” Her grandma encouraged her.
She described the scene and her grandma patted Minjeong’s hair affectionately.
“The thing with our gift, dear,” Minjeong listened carefully. “We will never be able to see our own future if lives are not interlinked.”
“Why?” Minjeong asked.
“It was just made like that.” Grandma chuckled. “My mother told me so, and so did my grandmother, and it was just like that.”
“Oh.” Minjeong was saddened.
She had always seen people’s futures and she hadn’t ever realised she had never seen hers.
“One day, Grandma will go somewhere very far.” Her grandma spoke gently.
“Will I be able to come too?” Minjeong had asked quietly and Grandma shook her head.
“No, dear, maybe in the distant future.” She had said.
“How about my future? What did you see? Is that the distant future?” Minjeong was a curious child.
With the gift of seeing the future, questions will just have to come automatically.
“I won’t tell you.” Grandma smiled and Minjeong frowned.
“Why? That’s not fair, Halmi.” Minjeong pouted. “I told you about your future; why won’t you tell me mine?”
“I saw something great and something beautiful.” Her grandmother had told her and Minjeong didn’t like the vagueness of it.
Minjeong would later come to the realisation that her grandmother’s future wasn’t too far away. In a couple of months, she was ten years old and her grandmother was hospitalised.
It was as she saw—her grandmother’s final wish was to pass by the sea and everyone came. The entire family came; a team of nurses was waiting, and Minjeong was sitting on the sand right beside her grandmother. She had predicted this day, yet it saddens her and she doesn’t like it one bit.
“Minjeong-ah.” Her grandmother’s voice was small and weak but Minjeong heard it loud and clear.
“Yes grandma?” Minjeong swallowed her tears.
Her grandmother reached towards her and held Minjeong’s hand. She couldn’t see her grandmother’s future anymore.
“Promise me, you’ll never be selfish with your gift. Don’t try to look for your future.” Her grandmother tells her. “If you search for it, it may never come, and you’ll change your fate. Don’t change your fate, because if you do, what you see may change when the day comes.”
“I promise, Halmi.” Minjeong nods.
Her grandma squeezes her hand and lets go of her. She faces the sea and Minjeong does too.
“She’s beautiful. You’re going to love so much.” Is the last thing her grandmother tells her and she realises she can't ask what it means.
—
Minjeong never holds another hand and she’s a recluse, if not for the persistence of her friends. She had met her best friend Aeri in high school and she saw her future. Aeri had taken a fall on the soccer field during PE, and without much thought, Minjeong had stretched her hand out to pull her up. It was bright, almost blinding and Minjeong heard the roar of a crowd and a mesopotamia of intricate clothing designs.
When Aeri tells her that she wants to be a fashion designer when they’re writing down aspirations for class, Minjeong thinks— yes, it’s going to come true.
She meets more people along the way and Aeri almost becomes her spokesperson since she’s known Minjeong for a long time and always deters people when they ask too many questions about her best friend.
The thing with her gift is that she can only see someone’s future once. Only one touch will fill Minjeong’s mind and some visions are something to look forward to, while others haunt her and burn through her flesh down to her bones.
She discovers this the second time her hand touches Aeri’s. They’re drunk and Minjeong’s just fallen over a pot plant, which was in her way. Aeri helped her up and she had no vision.
She felt relieved but knew better to hold no one’s hand except for Aeri’s.
Along the way, most visions are a mistake from the brush of a hand and a thoughtless handshake. Minjeong makes sure to never hold hands.
When she’s in college, Minjeong meets Yu Jimin.
“Woah.” From the get-go, Minjeong feels a pull and she knows it’s going towards Jimin. They’re all the same age and Jimin slides into their friend group along with her friends seamlessly. She meets Ningning, Jimin’s best friend and stumbles into her when Ningning’s running down the hall. She flies into Minjeong and Minjeong holds her—their hands brush against each other and Minjeong is assaulted with a bright and vivid vision, and it feels like a memory.
Ningning and Aeri are at a wedding and it’s all so loud and bright—a flower bouquet launches into the air and lands in Jimin’s hands. She’s sure it’s Ningning and Aeri’s wedding, since Ningning is the one throwing the flowers and Aeri is right beside her—the glinting of two rings sitting on Ningning’s ring finger and Aeri’s ring finger.
Minjeong realises then that she’s seeing the split vision of Jimin catching the bouquet from her own eyes, which means her fate is interlinked with this one.
She will be there at their wedding and she doesn’t know how far along that is, but they look happy and Minjeong hopes she will be too by then.
“Is it okay if I hold your arm?” Jimin asks shyly and Minjeong nods. As long as their palms do not meet, Minjeong won’t see her future.
Minjeong and Jimin had grown close. It turns out that Jimin is a little more persistent than what she puts out. Jimin had immediately found Minjeong cute and always cooed at her as if she were a small creature. She had called her ‘puppy’ once and the nickname stuck with the entire friend group. It makes her blush but she thinks sometimes it’s okay if Jimin calls her softly.
They're at a party tonight and Jimin had firmly stated she didn’t want to lose Minjeong in the crowd. Minjeong snorted and said as if. It would make more sense if Jimin were to go missing due to her friendly nature.
She’s almost friends with the entire student body and the entire world. Everyone wants a piece of her, whether it's a single or a minute-long conversation. She’s had numerous people ask her out, boys, girls and others alike. With a radiating smile and a beautiful personality, Minjeong understands why people would want to fall for Jimin.
After all, Minjeong harbours some sort of feeling under all of her mysterious demeanour towards her friend.
She wouldn’t chase Jimin if she could, because there’s a chance that if one day Minjeong took Jimin’s hand in hers, she could predict a future without her in it. She’d rather go blind than see someone else in love with Jimin.
“Hey.” Jimin nudges her softly.
“Hm?” They’re no longer inside the house and Minjeong blinks.
“I lost you for a bit there.” Jimin chuckles and Minjeong blushes.
“Sorry.”
“What were you thinking about?” Jimin asks, her hand no longer holding onto Minjeong’s wrist but her jacket instead.
Jimin is a clingy person, from what Minjeong has observed from the length of knowing her. She’s always latching onto a person, whether it be by the hand, the arm, or the shoulder—quite literally hanging off of a person, but indeed, Jimin is very touch-friendly, while Minjeong is not—for obvious reasons. Jimin is aware of Minjeong’s boundaries and has been quite serious about them. Out of all her friends, Minjeong has met hands with them by accident very early on in their friendships, but with Jimin, it’s been months and years, and never has she touched her hands.
Jimin has adapted to Minjeong’s aversion to touch; rather than grabbing onto her hand without thought, Jimin asks whether she could hold her wrist and arm or would just hold onto a piece of Minjeong’s clothing.
“Nothing.” Minjeong smiles softly.
“Oh, I see.” Jimin smirks. “You were thinking about me.”
Minjeong rolls her eyes.
“Okay, I guess so.” Minjeong shrugs.
“Why? Am I pretty today?” Jimin flutters her eyelids.
“You’re always pretty.” Minjeong doesn’t need to think to answer.
Minjeong chuckles. It’s always almost too easy to fluster Jimin. Her cheeks grow pink and her ears burn red immediately.
Minjeong reaches over and rubs the tip of Jimin’s ear between her thumb and index finger.
“Your ears are red.” Jimin only turns even redder and it’s not the teasing, but it’s Minjeong’s cool touch to her burning ear.
Minjeong does admit to herself that sometimes she craves touch—the burning ones and even the most gentle ones. If she is one to not receive it, she will always be willing to give it, especially if it makes Jimin stutter and blush horrendously bad.
“Hey!” Jimin whines, pushing Minjeong away.
It only makes Minjeong laugh even louder.
—
“So what are you going to do about Aeri?” Jimin asks Ningning once she’s located her in the cafeteria.
“What about her?” Ningning is jumpy and blushing the moment Jimin mentions the name.
“Uh-huh, yeah, keeping real cool about it, aren’t you?” Jimin snorts and Ningning whines.
“I can’t! Every time I’m around her and I try to ask her out, I literally word-vomit and want to be eaten alive by a pothole.” Ningning pouts.
“I’m pretty sure you’re fine just the way you are. She likes you; I’m sure of it.” Jimin says it offhandedly.
“How can you be sure?” Ningning’s eyes are round and so much like those of a kitten.
“Um, because she looks at you like you hung the stars for her and please, Ning,” Jimin rolls her eyes. “She listens so intently when you’re rambling to her. For all I know, that girl is head over heels for you too.”
“Okay, okay… I’m thinking of asking her after Johnny’s party, since Minjeong and Aeri are crashing at our place since it’s closer.” Ningning tells her best friend. “Aeri and I rarely get drunk, just a bit tipsy, so with that liquid courage, I’ll ask her out.”
“See, just be brave.” Jimin says. “She likes you for who you are—there's no way she’ll reject you.”
“Okay, how about you be brave?” Ningning turns the conversation around.
“Me?” Jimin blinks.
“Yeah, what are you going to do about your colossal crush on Minjeong?” Ningning has to stifle her laugh, the way that Jimin’s eyes widen and her ears turn red.
“What? I don’t have a colossal crush on her!” Jimin’s voice rises in pitch as she lies.
“Okay, Pinocchio.” Ningning snorts.
“I don’t like her like that.” Jimin scowls. “She’s—she’s a good friend. That’s all.”
“Liar.” Ningning sing-songs.
“I’m not!”
“You know, you could at least try to be convincing.” Ningning laughs. “You have been tailing Minjeong since the day you met her and called her cute first thing.”
“Because she is cute.” Jimin doesn’t refute.
“Cute enough that you want to be with her?” Ningning raises a brow.
“I. Do. Not. Have. A. Crush.” Jimin huffs.
“What’s that I hear about Jimin having a crush?” Aeri slides into the seat right next to Ningning and Jimin is mortified, because if Aeri’s here, it means Jimin is too.
“Um, how much of our conversation did you hear?” Jimin blinks.
“Literally the last line. Anyway, dish about your crush!” Aeri beams.
“I don’t—”
“Well, I’m trying to tell Jimin that she likes someone, but she’s denying it.” Ningning tells Aeri.
“You have a crush?” Minjeong asks and she blushes when three pairs of eyes are on her. She curses herself inwardly for voicing her thoughts aloud.
“No, I don't.” Jimin huffs through gritted teeth as she glares at Ningning. “I’m not denying anything because I actually do not have a crush.”
“Okay, if you’re not crushing, then you’re way past that point.” Ningning says as Jimin takes a sip of the fruit juice bottle that appeared at her side. “You're in love.”
Jimin hacks up the juice immediately as soon as those words leave Ningning’s mouth.
“Are you okay?” Minjeong panics, patting Jimin’s back.
“I–I’m fine!” Jimin’s throat burns and Ningning is wheezing as she dies of laughter.
“Are you sure?” Minjeong hands her a napkin and Jimin takes it gratefully, making sure to avoid Minjeong’s hand just in case.
“That was amazing!” Ningning cackles loudly, attracting the attention of their peers.
“If I had known the juice would try to kill you, I wouldn’t have gotten it for you.” Minjeong humours, smiling softly.
Jimin is instantly dazed by the way Minjeong smiles softly as she pats her back. Everything about her looks so soft and she’s so gentle to the touch. Jimin thinks being able to receive Minjeong’s touch makes her feel like she’s been given treasure—worth unknown to man.
“Yeah, not crushing my ass…” Ningning mumbles under her breath.
—
“Where’s Jimin?” Aeri finds her during Johnny’s party. She’s sitting down on a vacant couch with a drink in her hand. Its taste is disgusting and it’s like drinking straight rubbing alcohol. Whatever it was, Ningning gave it to her and promised it was good. She thinks their tastes are different.
“She went to get nicer drinks.” Minjeong answers. “This drink tastes like ass!”
“Oh.” Aeri chuckles, sliding down to sit on the arm rest of the couch.
“What?” Minjeong looks up and finds Aeri looking at her softly.
“What’s wrong, puppy?” Aeri asks. “You’ve been looking a little sad since a couple days ago. I haven’t been able to ask you why.”
“I’m fine.” Minjeong shakes her head—a lie.
“You can tell me. I’m your best friend.” Aeri nudges her.
And Minjeong thinks: I see the future when I hold someone’s hand for the first time; it’s a family gift.
I used my gift to predict my school friend’s futures, and they stopped believing me after a while.
I predicted my grandmother’s death.
She told me my future was something great and beautiful. Oh, I also can’t see my own future unless it is interlinked with someone else's.
Grandma said that she’s beautiful and that I’m going to love so much, and I don’t know who is meant to be beautiful but I know that I love so much because I’m falling for Yu Jimin—terribly bad.
Also, you’re a successful fashion designer in the future, just as you want, and you marry Ningning in the future, the wedding will be beautiful.
She lifts her drink to her mouth and swallows it all down.
“I can see the future.” Minjeong decides one person to tell is okay.
“Trippy.” Aeri smiles but then sees that Minjeong isn’t smiling at all. “Oh, you’re serious?”
Minjeong nods carefully.
“H–how?” Aeri asks.
Minjeong raises her hand and faces her palm in Aeri’s view to show her.
“When I hold someone’s hand for the first time, I see a little bit of their future.” Minjeong tells her.
“That’s why you don’t like physical touch? Well, just the hands bit.” Aeri asks and Minjeong nods.
“Then you’ve seen my future! Tell me about it—actually, wait, don’t tell me because maybe it won’t come true.” Aeri rambles and Minjeong chuckles.
“It only won’t come true if you purposely go out of your way to change your fate.” Minjeong says. "But your future is great. It’s bright.”
"Oh, thank god.” Aeri sighs with relief. “At least that must mean I’m not broke, homeless and alone.”
“Sure.” Minjeong nods.
“Can you see your own future?” Aeri asks.
“No. I can only see it if I’m also in their future.” Minjeong answers, sloshing the remaining alcohol around in her cup.
“Huh.” Aeri nods. “Who else's future have you seen?”
“Almost everyone I know.” Minjeong shrugs.
“Even Jimin’s?”
“No.” Minjeong shakes her head. “She’s very careful and I am too.”
“I would think you’d see hers first.” Aeri chuckles. “You’re glued to each other every day.”
“I’m careful.”
Minjeong doesn’t say: I’m afraid to see Jimin’s future, lest I not be in it the way I want.
“You don’t think I’m a liar?” Minjeong asks.
“No, I believe you. You’re a very literal person, so if you’re telling me things like this, then you’re being real.” Aeri says.
“I’m glad you’re my best friend.” Minjeong grins.
“Me too, puppy.” Aeri pats her head and Minjeong hums.
Minjeong can’t choose when or what part of someone’s future she can see in those brief five seconds, but sometimes she is glad she can still be surprised.
Ningning had confessed her love for Aeri, standing on a table with more than the usual amount of alcohol ingested that can count as liquid courage.
Aeri had dragged her down and everyone clambered into an Uber back to Ningning and Jimin’s place. Ningning’s head was lolling against Minjeong’s shoulder in the backseat and she was sure Ningning was drooling on her, but she couldn’t move or complain since Jimin rested her head on her other shoulder, gently tracing shapes against her wrist.
Her stomach had fluttered at the ticklish feeling but she wanted it to never go away—the touch.
They dragged Ningning upstairs and Minjeong was glad Jimin could still walk.
Jimin fell into her bed and Minjeong was going to leave for the couch when a curled hand around a fist full of her shirt pulled her right back in.
“Stay. Please.” Jimin was awake, her cheeks red and her vision was clear enough to make sure it was Minjeong.
“Okay.” Minjeong was never really strong when it came to her own feelings.
When it came down to Jimin, she’d do anything and everything.
Minjeong lay carefully on Jimin’s bed, where the girl had scooted back to give Minjeong enough space. Jimin lay on her side, her hands tucked under her cheek, as she blinked like a cat, staring at Minjeong.
“I thought you told me to stay so you could sleep?” Minjeong questions, mirroring Jimin’s position.
“I just realised we’ve never had a sleepover," Jimin says.
“We’re having one now.” Minjeong points out and Jimin reaches out with her socked foot to kick Minjeong.
“A proper one, puppy.” Jimin grumbles and Minjeong chuckles.
“Okay. We can have one.” Minjeong says and Jimin perks up.
“Really?” Jimin inches closer and Minjeong smiles at her adorable nature.
“Yes, Jimin.”
“But I never asked because I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable.”
You never could if you tried.”
“So if I asked you to cuddle me to sleep right now, you’d say yes?” Jimin smirks.
“I would.”
“Oh.” Jimin blushes, and even though the lights are off in the room, Minjeong can very well see the bright blush on her face and ears. “I was kidding.”
“Turn over.”
Jimin turns around and Minjeong scoots closer, draping an arm around Jimin’s waist and pulling her in—their legs tangling together.
“Is this what you wanted?” Minjeong asks.
“I’m never taking this for granted.” Jimin squeals and leans back into Minjeong more.
“Don’t get used to it.”
Jimin’s hands make sure to rest on top of Minjeong’s forearms and soon she falls asleep in Minjeong’s warm embrace.
Minjeong swallows thickly.
She looks over Jimin’s shoulder and looks at how close Jimin’s hand is to hers. If she slid her hand out slowly, their hands would meet, and Minjeong would see Jimin’s future.
She thinks that no future scares her more than the one Jimin holds.
I’m sorry, grandma— she thinks.
I want to be selfish.
She slips her hand out of Jimin’s grasp and reaches to intertwine their hands.
Jimin’s future assaults her mind immediately—bright flashes and a range of colours blurr past her. She hears laughter and feels a warm, gentle touch.
Then she’s transported briefly into a scene and Jimin’s standing on a lookout on a hill. The wind is blowing strongly, flitting through Jimin’s bangs—ones that she doesn’t have right now—and the sun is setting.
Jimin is standing with flowers in her hand, hanging by her side by her slack arms and a blazer over her shoulders. Her eyes are red and Minjeong hopes it’s from the wind. There’s a smell and it’s salty and not like the sea below them, and there’s a vague wetness on Minjeong’s cheeks.
And then Minjeong realises it when she’s pulled out of the future.
She was looking at Jimin through her own eyes.
She wasn’t an unseeable bystander and she wasn’t looking through Jimin’s eyes.
She had selfishly searched for her own future in Jimin’s and she regrets it. She swallows thickly, pulling away slowly from Jimin to look for water in the kitchen.
She moves quietly and fills a glass with water.
She closes her eyes, the cold water running down her throat.
She was crying and Jimin was too.
What did that mean? What did their future entail for them? There would be a time that would come where Minjeong would make Jimin cry and she didn’t like that—she didn’t like it at all.
What and who was beautiful? And what was great? She wanted to ask her grandmother. Was there something great and something beautiful after that day with Jimin? She doesn’t think she can find something like that if she makes the most beautiful girl in her eyes lose her smile like that.
And when Jimin wakes up the next morning, Minjeong is already up—unable to sleep the previous night. Jimin is smiling and padding towards her.
Minjeong reaches out, her hand intertwining with Jimin’s.
“Good morning.”
“Morning!” Jimin beams, as if she wasn’t drunk last night.
Their hands swing back and forth and Jimin leans down to rub her cheek against Minjeong’s hair like a cat, searching for affection.
Minjeong thinks: I can give you all you want now, but we will be unhappy in the future and I cannot let it happen.
Minjeong holds Jimin in her arms.
She starts to believe that this gift is more like a curse than anything else.
—
“Puppy.” Jimin stared at Minjeong.
“Me?” She blinked, pointing to herself.
“Mhm. You’re cute.” Jimin grins.
“Wait, puppy?” Aeri guffaws. “That’s the perfect nickname!”
Aeri laughs loudly and her voice vibrates across the cafeteria.
“Shut up! I’m not a puppy.” Minjeong pouted.
“So cute,” Jimin had said and Minjeong blushed furiously.
“Seriously! She’s so puppy!” Ningning joined in and so did the rest of their friends.
When they’re leaving campus, heading to go out to eat, Jimin tugs on Minjeong’s bag and pulls her back.
“Minjeongie.” Jimin said softly.
“Mm?”
“If you don’t like the nickname ‘puppy’ I can tell the rest to stop calling you that. I don’t want to make you uncomfortable, sorry.” Jimin’s earnest apology, her fidgeting hand and her averted eyes make Minjeong smile.
“I don’t mind. It’s not uncomfortable.” Minjeong shakes her head.
“Are you sure?”
“I’m sure, Jimin.” Minjeong nods, not liking how Jimin’s mood was slightly downcast.
“Okay…”
The next day, Minjeong sat next to Jimin in class and handed her a bottle of her favourite juice.
“What’s this for?” Jimin perks up.
“I didn’t like how your expression looked yesterday.” Minjeong answers. “I’m okay with the nickname puppy and you could never make me uncomfortable.”
Jimin blushes.
“Thank you… How did you know this was my favourite?” She asks.
“You told me once.” Minjeong shrugs.
“And you remembered?” Jimin blinks.
“Of course.”
The next time they share a class together, Jimin hands her a plastic bag with a weight in it.
“What’s this?”
“Snacks.” Jimin tells her, trying to be nonchalant but her gaze is averted and her hand is fidgeting with the hem of her shirt.
“These are all my favourites.” Minjeong blinks.
“I know.”
“Jimin…” Minjeong sighs softly, looking through the bag. “Do you still feel bad about teasing me?”
“No!” Jimin blushes. “I just wanted to return the juice favour, and I went to get only one snack for you, but everything in the store reminded me of you so I bought one of everything.”
Jimin’s ears are burning red and Minjeong laughs, reaching over to touch her red ear.
“Look at you, red ears.”
“Hey!”
“It’s cute.”
“Fine... puppy.”
Minjeong looks through the snacks and grins brightly, feeling incredibly happy to have a new college struggle snack stash.
“How’d you get all my favourites right, seriously?” Minjeong is in awe.
“You’ve told me before.”
“You remembered all of it?”
“Of course.” Jimin grins and Minjeong’s heart stutters in her chest.