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Lovely smells filled the inside of a small kitchen, oil sizzled and popped on a large frying pan and inside, various colorful vegetables and meats glistened, as its heat blushed their surfaces with a delightful golden brown tint. A large robot with curly blonde hair and shiny brass skin tossed the ingredients around. There wasn't much finesse in his movements, but his hand was stable and eyes focused.
“Are you done?” The short man across from him shuffled his feet on the floor- his tail curling and waving behind him.
“No.” The robot sighed. “I can't believe I picked the most impatient person on the ship to do this with me. This is the third time you've asked me this.'' He picked up the pan by its handle and took a step back, accidentally knocking some alien spices with his hip.
“Fuck!” He looked over, with the intent of picking up the scattered particles, but a tail brushed his quad in reassurance.
“God damnit, Brian, you can't even take a step without knocking something over can you?” The short man was hunched over to the ground next to him, cleaning up the mess for him.
“Thanks for the help, Jonny.”
Jonny made a chirp of acknowledgement and leaned towards the dish, resting on the now cold stovetop. He extended his hand and dipped his finger in the sauce that covered the eye-catching ingredients, giving it a lick. Brian groaned disapprovingly.
“Can't you just wait until I serve it?”
“Nope!” He went in for another, his tail wrapping around Brian's waist and gently brushing the surface of his stomach. “I'm the teacher after all, you should be thanking me for even giving this stuff a try.”
Brian rolled his eyes but relaxed into his tail's embrace. “So…. How is it then?” He asked shyly.
Jonny gave it a thought. “I mean, it tastes right- it tastes like food.”
“That's very vague and unhelpful.”
“Well, I can't say it sucks, which is unexpected- but it's definitely… missing something.”
Brian frowned. “I followed the recipe you gave me exactly!” He assured, recounting every step in his robotic brain.
“No, no, yeah that's- that's the problem though.” Jonny moved away to the other side of the counter they stood at, leaving Brian's waist cold and lonely.
“We need to fuck something up in there i think.”
He submerged his arms inside a cabinet, filled to the brim with different bags and packets of spices and herbs, with his eyes closed, he shuffled them around and pulled out a random packet.
“What is this?” Brian clutched the handle of his pan. “We're not adding that to the food, whatever it is, it wasn't in the recipe.”
“Calm down, scrap metal.” He made an effort to push away the tall man, but he didn't even flinch, holding the pan stubbornly. Jonny's hand reached somewhere between the robot and the stove.
“Let me make it better!” He struggled to say, as his other hand went in for the dish.
“How will adding just any random bag from this monstrosity of a spice drawer fix my dish!?”
“I've cooked many times, I know better!”
“ You are crazy! ”
A quiet sizzle, previously unnoticed by the two bantering men was slowly rising in volume. They turned their heads towards the stove- one's expression horrified, while the other's pleased.
“What did you do?!” The robot took the pan off the burner that was now spitting flames and sparks in front of them. He frantically mashed the stove's buttons to turn it off and sighed with relief when the kitchen was no longer under a serious fire threat. He looked at his work, previously colorful and shiny, now burnt and brownish, then at the man in front of him, a sly smile on his face as he sprinkled the mysterious crushed herbs on Brian's first dish.
“ Now it should be good. Come on, put it on a plate or something!” He purred, walking away towards the small table he sat at before.
Wordlessly, Brian plated his poor dish, its pleasant appetizing glisten replaced by a dark, dull char. He sat in front of Jonny with a defeated emotion, but still stared at him with intent as he gathered up the bits of meat and vegetables onto his fork, and shoved them into his mouth.
“Is it any better?” He asked doubtfully.
Jonny chewed idly, expression unreadable.
“Mmmm… that's more like it”
Brian looked at him with confusion, but decided that he's not the one with taste buds around here, and he should just trust Jonny on this.
“So, what? You just wanted me to judge your cooking skills?”
“No, I told you- I want to know what food feels like.” He rested his chin on his palm for support and watched the other man.
Jonny took another bite, now mostly of the sauce and another, green kind of alien vegetable. It looked soft on his fork and the sauce it was covered in dripped down lazily as it entered Jonny's mouth.
“It's… spicy. Spicy is like a slightly painful sensation on your tongue. But people like it, myself included.”
Brian watched him with curiosity. “That's kind of masochistic.”
Jonny choked. “Yeah, I guess.”
He got some of the thick brown sauce to stay on his fork, and licked it off.
“The sauce has a deep flavor, and it's very thick and kind of sticky, that's something you can feel without taste buds by simply touching it. But don't touch my food.” He curled his hand around his plate. Brian nodded, his face was deeply focused, and he was visibly processing the information given to him.
“How did your messing around change the flavor?” He asked finally.
“It made it taste more human.”
Brian frowned, but before he could respond, Jonny continued.
“Like, you can't just follow a recipe that perfectly, you need to fuck around with it, have some fun, If you don't it just won't taste the same.” He reassured. “And sometimes burning things a little makes them taste more interesting.” As he said that, he picked a darker, more charred piece of meat and ate it.
“The meat is very delicate, it breaks easily but that's a good thing- you don't really want to struggle to eat things you know? And the char gives it a unique, more complex flavor.” He covered his next bite in more of the mystery herb that floated on the sauce. “And this stuff makes it taste slightly worse to be honest.” He chuckled.
“What about this?” Brian pointed to a thick red leaf that poked out of his plate. “What does this taste like?”
“Oh.” He poked it with his fork. “You don't eat that stuff.”
“Then why'd you tell me to add it?”
“It adds flavor. If you ate it by itself it'd taste like shit, but when added to the sauce it gives the taste another layer, a little kick.”
Brian didn't want to dwell on how a sauce could kick someone, so he just kept watching him eat.
“Thank you.” He smiled at him sincerely.
“Free food.” Jonny shrugged as he tugged at the robot's chair with his leg, suggesting he should drag it closer to him. Brian proceeded and sat closer to Jonny, their legs touching lightly, and his tail returned to his rightful place- on Brian's waist, while Brian's hand rested down on his lap.
After Jonny finished the plate he laid back on his chair, hand on his stomach and gazed at the robot with a smile.
“This was alright for a first time. You might need a few more lessons though.”
Despite knowing he could carry out every instruction given by any recipe with robotic precision, he nodded, pleased by the idea of spending more time together.
“I guess we could do this again then.”
“Yeah…” jonny laid his head on Brian's shoulder and dragged the man's hand onto his stomach, replacing his own.
“We could.”
