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It was late in the afternoon, but the sky had already gone black. Snow was falling gently outside the window, collecting on the sill. Nancy pulled on her jacket and grabbed her purse, twirling her keys on her finger. She passed the editor’s office and stopped in the doorway. They were the only ones left at the Hawkins Post that day.
“I’m headed out.”
Paul looked up, smiling. “Alright. See you next year.” It was a corny joke, but it was better than cruel mocking.
“Merry Christmas, Paul.”
Nancy carried on to the elevator and rode it down to the silent lobby. She walked out onto the quiet street, the shops dark and empty, the streetlights painting the snow with their orange glow. The temperature was somewhere in the high 20s and her breath billowed out in front of her face in a swirling cloud. She took shelter in her VW Rabbit, the engine humming as the radio pumped out the same few songs that had been playing for weeks now. The tires kicked up brown slush as she backed out and onto the street. The stillness was eerie.
She did not pass another car on the drive home. The park lay on the outskirts of town, so the route took her through the dark Indiana woods, lit only by the limited reach of the headlights. As a kid, she had always watched the treeline for the pukwudgies, little wild men of Indigenous myth, but had never seen any trace of them. Nowadays, there were more monstrous things which might be lurking between the trees, trees which had hidden her from those things in the past. If not for the slick ice, she might have put the pedal to the floor, but she had a pregnant girlfriend waiting for her at home.
In contrast to bleak downtown, the trailer park was bright and full of life. Decorations littered the little lawns and lights were strung between them. Shapes moved behind the yellow windows and cars were parked together wherever there was open dirt or grass. All she had done was build a snowman and place a wreath on the door, but it was enough to tell everyone that they were feeling the Christmas spirit. She marched up the steps and pushed the door open, feeling the warmth wash over her. Robin was in the kitchenette, placing sliced strawberries over the cheesecake.
“Hi, Nance.” She pecked her on the forehead. “How was work?”
“Uneventful.” Nancy popped a strawberry in her mouth. “I hope you haven’t been working too hard.”
“Don’t worry about me. You’re the one who’s been on her feet all day.”
“And you’re the one with a human being in her stomach.”
“My uterus, not my stomach.”
“It’s the same general area.”
“Yeah, but they’re two completely different organ systems.”
“I feel like we’ve had this conversation before.”
“We probably have.”
They gathered the dessert and presents, then returned to the car, waving to a couple of their neighbors from the stoop. Robin sat with the cake in her lap, pushed to her knees by her belly. She insisted that she was fine, but seemed relieved as she sank into the seat. “Last Christmas” played on the radio as they pulled onto the main road. This little German car was nothing impressive, but it was perfect for them. A little car for a little family.
Nancy glanced over at Robin, watching the trees pass through the window. “It’s crazy to think that we barely even knew each other last Christmas.”
Robin chuckled, rubbing her belly. “Most people are just moving in at nine months. We’ll be celebrating our eleven-month anniversary when he’s born.” She was seven months pregnant and seemed more mature every day. She was Nancy’s rock.
The black evening was less eerie with Robin beside her. It was actually pretty peaceful, like they could drive for hours, just listening to the radio without a care in the world. But, she was getting hungry after a long day at work and Robin had become quite a good baker over the past few months. Besides, Ted would get grumpy if they were late and kept him from the dinner that he had been looking forward to since Thanksgiving.
She had somehow forgotten about the annual decoration competition. Ted was always pretty apathetic about it, but Karen pushed him to at least put some effort into it. The house wasn’t the most dramatic on the block, but it looked nice. Karen was definitely happy with their presentation this year. Stepping out of the car, Nancy looked up at the Frosty on the roof, standing beside the chimney, a monolithic elf on the highest shelf. Robin came round the hood.
“That thing gives me the creeps.”
“I liked it when I was a kid. I always thought that my snowmen would come to life if I could just get my hands on a top hat.”
“I must look like a snowman with my bump.”
“And your pale Irish skin.” Nancy rubbed Robin’s nose, her skin almost glowing.
She rapped her bony knuckles on the door and Ted answered swiftly, neutral as always but now wearing a colorful sweater that Karen had forced him into.
“Hey there.”
“Hi, Dad.” She hugged him and he patted her on the back.
Robin nodded. “Hi, Ted.”
“Robin.” He took the cake. “Let me take this off your hands so you can go make yourself comfortable. Karen says dinner will be ready in just a few minutes.”
Robin gave Nancy a pleased look. Ted had been getting pretty courteous over the past few months.
They made their way to the living room, where Mike and Holly were watching Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. Nancy ruffled Mike’s hair and they sat for a few minutes. Nancy looked over at Holly, born eight years after Mike and thirteen years after herself. It had been surreal having a baby sister as she was going into high school, but becoming an aunt at six years old was probably considerably more weird. Her nephew would be in middle school by the time she graduated. They would probably be more like cousins.
Soon enough, Karen called them into the dining room. Nancy held out a hand to help Robin up, kissing her knuckles and escorting her waddling girlfriend to the table. Ted and Karen sat at the ends of the table, Nancy across from Mike and Robin across from Holly. The feast before them unleashed a wave of mingling smells that made Nancy realize just how hungry she was.
Robin piled mashed potatoes onto her plate. “Karen, you’re really spoiling me with that ham. It looks delicious.”
“Have as much as you like. Ted needs to cut back anyway.”
“Holly and I can split it fifty-fifty.”
Holly looked up at her, neutral like her father.
“At least you don’t have to worry about giving up alcohol.” Ted shook his head. “If I couldn’t enjoy a beer for nine months, I think I’d lose my mind.”
Karen rolled her eyes. “Oh, don’t be so dramatic.”
“When Nancy was born, our wine suddenly disappeared within a matter of days and I didn’t have a single drop.”
Mike nodded. “I thought you were acting weird after you came home with Holly.”
“Hey, I had just pushed a person out of my body. I think I was entitled to a little wine. Robin is, too.”
“But she’s only eighteen.”
Karen shrugged. “If she’s old enough to give birth, I think she’s old enough to have a drink every once-in-a-while. You’ll just have to wait a couple more months.”
“I’m excited to get it all over with, but I will miss being waited on around the clock.”
“Tell me about it. Before too long, you’ll be the one doing the waiting, so enjoy it while you still can. At least you don’t already have two hormonal teenagers to worry about.”
Mike nibbled on his ham. “Are you guys going to start sending out your own holiday cards?”
Nancy looked up at Robin. “That might be nice. ‘Happy Holidays from the Buckleys.”
“We don’t have to use my name. We could be the Buckley-Wheelers or the Wheeler-Buckleys.”
“I just figure that I’ll be outnumbered because the baby is taking your name. And if we ever get married, I’d want to take your name, too.”
Ted sipped his wine. “Ouch.”
“You’ll probably have to wait a long time before you can, though.”
She turned to Mike. “Well, we can still hold a ceremony and I can change my name and refer to Robin as my wife without being legally married. The hardest part would be finding a ring that won’t fall off my bony finger.”
“I would love to have a winter wedding. I feel like it’s the perfect peaceful atmosphere.”
“And we wouldn’t need an extravagant ceremony or anything, just a few close friends and some nice clothes, no fat bill for our parents to foot.”
Ted breathed a sigh of relief.
“Maybe it’s something we should think about.”
Nancy nodded. “Yeah. We should.”
Karen was almost on the verge of tears. “My little girl is all grown up. You’ve taken the bull by its horns and you’re not letting go anytime soon.”
“I’m just surprised you’re not freaking out over becoming a grandmother at forty.”
“If I’m a young grandparent, then that means I’m still young.”
Nancy was young, but she felt old, like the Demogorgon and the Mind-Flayer and Vecna had aged her twice as fast. Every morning, she expected to see a white hair hanging in front of her face, but what she really saw was Robin sleeping peacefully beside her.
***
By the time Karen went to tuck Holly in for the night, Robin and Ted were already fast asleep. Robin had dozed off after A Charlie Brown Christmas, laying in the recliner that Ted had surrendered to her like a gentleman, their heads limp on their necks. Nancy glanced over at her as she collected their plates from the coffee table, her cheesecake having been a big hit with the in-laws. After dinner, she would lay on the couch and set her feet in Nancy’s lap for a massage as she ran her hands over her smooth belly. It was nice to have a simple routine for once in her life.
Nancy walked back into the kitchen, where Mike was doing the dishes for the first time in forever, a true Christmas miracle. He looked funny with the big yellow gloves on.
“Look at you, pitching in for once.”
“Yeah, yeah.”
She rolled up her sleeves and got to drying the bigger pieces. “You’ve been pretty neutral about all of this.”
“About what?”
“The baby.”
“Oh. Right.”
“Are you excited that you’re going to be an uncle?”
“I am. It’s just a little weird. I mean, it was weird enough when Holly was born and I was eight years old. But, it’s a nice distraction from everything we’ve been through. This is something out of Days of Our Lives, not The Thing, and I’m grateful for that. Things like this happen, things you can’t control, so you just have to roll with them, go with the flow. It’s a lot easier if you do.”
“That’s very mature of you, Mike. You’re going to be a good role model.”
He nodded. “I know we aren’t that close, but you’re my sister and I want to help.”
“I think we’re probably closer to each other than we are to Holly.”
“Yeah. She’s an enigma.”
“I honestly forget about her sometimes. She kind of creeps me out.”
“What did you get her?”
“A took a leap of faith and got a Barbie.”
“That’s probably right."
They didn’t have to work for long. They got the dishes sorted away, wiped down the counter, threw the tablecloth in the laundry, and made sure the candles were blown out. Mike went upstairs to get ready for bed, passing Karen on his way up. She approached Nancy, who was looking at the Christmas tree in the dark den, the little lights shooting colorful spots onto the walls.
“You go get the presents from the garage and I’ll wake your father.”
“Good luck.”
Rubbing her hands and bracing for the cold, Nancy went to the door and grabbed the inconspicuous trash bag from the corner, a way to hide the presents which converged poetically with Santa’s bag. She hauled it to the den and the three of them tucked the loot under the tree. Among the packages was Nancy’s gift for Robin, something that she had spent a bit of time on and hoped that Robin would like. It was strange to be the one buying and placing the presents, to be one of the parents now. It was an alien feeling, but one which seemed to suit her.
They got back to their feet, picking pine needles out of their hair and wiping their hands on their pants.
“I’m going to stay down here with Robin. I don’t want her to hike up the stairs just to come back down again.”
“Alright. We’ll see you in the morning, then.” Karen patted her shoulder. “Feel free to dig into the cookies. You’re one of us now.”
Nancy watched her parents vanish up the stairs before falling back onto the couch. She took a cookie and washed it down with cold milk. She turned to Robin, who was still out like a light, not a hair out of place. She turned the recliner, pulling off Robin’s socks and pressing her thumbs into the sole of her foot. Robin shifted, humming, and rolled her head to the side. The dresses she wore were totally uncharacteristic, but she looked beautiful. Nancy still felt guilty for throwing the biggest wrench into her hopes and dreams by accidentally impregnating her, but they were happy. All she wanted was a life where the only thing she had to worry about was soothing Robin’s aching feet.
***
Robin woke to the faint smell of tea. Nancy was sipping from a steaming mug on the couch and Mike sat beside her, his black hair like a tangled bush. It was dark outside.
“What time is it?”
“Almost 5.”
Mike nodded. “She’ll be here any minute.”
Robin went to sit up, but fell back. “Nance, I’m stuck.”
Nancy reached over and dropped the footrest, pushing Robin up. "How do you feel?”
“Rested. I must have nodded off pretty early.”
Two sets of feet pounded down the stairs. Karen and Ted, both looking tired, strode into the den.
“Just in time.”
Holly came bounding along mere moments later. “It’s Christmas! It’s Christmas!” She reached the coffee table and gasped. “Santa ate his cookies!”
Nancy wiped her mouth.
Holly practically dove under the tree and Ted knelt beside her as she tore open her first present, the Barbie that Nancy and Robin had bought for her. She shrieked with delight and they shared a relieved look. Mike got the new NES ports of Commando and 1942, Ted got a new barbeque apron and a beer can holder, Karen got a new necklace and some candles, and Nancy got a new watch. With nowhere to hide it, Robin had given Nancy her gift a bit early, a copy of Emily Dickinson’s works. Now, it was her turn.
Ted pulled a large present from under the tree, handing it to her. “Looks like this one is for you.”
Taking it, she noticed a smile on Nancy’s face. She tore the paper away to find a smooth leather cover and pulled it open. It was a photo album. Inside was a collection of pictures from the yearbook and California, polaroids and ultrasounds, Nancy’s articles and Robin’s bump. There was a list of names that they had drafted, proposing Max and John and Edward before finally landing on Barry. She lingered on the ultrasounds, tapping her finger against the page.
“That’s our baby, little Barry Buckley.”
“We have a whole lifetime to fill this book. I wonder how many pages we’ll fill by next Christmas.”
Robin felt the hot tears beginning to well up in her eyes. “Nancy, this is really nice.”
Nancy held her hand. “You’re carrying a child you never asked for. I want to spend my whole life making up for it.”
“The best gifts are the ones you never think to ask for.” She pressed a wet, salty kiss to Nancy’s lips. “I love you, Nance.”
It was a tender moment. It even got smiles out of Mike and Ted.
Ted cleaned up the wrapping paper while Nancy and Karen went to prepare a hearty breakfast. Mike booted up his new copy of Commando, taking a couple of controllers in his hands.
“Want to play?’
Robin shrugged. “Why not?” She sat beside him on the couch and took a controller.
They shot blue bullets at the enemy soldiers, probably Cubans or Sandistas. They made their way to the first chamber and freed their comrade, watching as he pranced away before returning to the surface and pushing on through the onslaught, racking up a pretty good score along the way.
“What do you think so far?”
“It’s a good game. I’m glad I have someone to help me, though.”
“It doesn’t come close to the real thing.”
“Dustin won’t let us hear the end of it.” He tossed a grenade. “Do you think you’ll ever tell your kid about all of this?”
“I hope I never have to.”
***
The snow was still falling heavily by the time they pulled up to Steve’s place. Vickie met them at the door and they followed her into the kitchen, where Steve was standing with a hot apple pie in his hands and a dusty apron hanging from his neck.
“Look at you, Harrington. I guess we know who wears the pants in this relationship.”
“Hey, it took me hours to bake this thing. Sticks and stones may break my bones…”
“Okay, nancy boy.”
“Your girlfriend is literally named Nancy and she used to be a boy."
“Okay, nancy boy.”
He rolled his eyes. “You’re impossible, Buckley.”
Nancy sighed. “I’ll help with the cleanup. You two get settled.”
Sharing a look, Robin and Vickie shrugged and walked into the cavernous den. Steve had a nice big TV and a wide soft couch. If there was a fridge and a stove, she could turn this one room into her own little home and life comfortably.
“This house always seems a bit bigger every time I come here.”
“Eh. I’m used to it by now. I was always intimidated by his parents, but I found out pretty quickly that they don’t give a rat’s ass about what he does. We’ve been dating for, like, eight months now and I can count the times I’ve met them on one hand.”
“Have you guys thought about moving in together yet?”
“It hasn’t come up, but I’d be open to it. I mean, this house is more than enough for four people, especially if two of them are hardly ever around.”
“I’m glad you guys like each other. You’re a good match, like peanut butter and jelly.”
“It was awkward for the first couple of months, but seeing him sing with that drag queen in California certainly helped. We’re pretty different, but I’ve come to love him for the man that he is.”
“Did he ever mention that I used to have a crush on you?”
“Yeah. I guess it was kind of obvious, now that I think about it.”
“Oh, absolutely.” Robin sighed. “Nine months ago, if you’d shown me a picture of this exact moment, I wouldn’t have known what to make of it. I would never have been able to guess that I had set you up with Steve and that I was pregnant with Nancy Wheeler’s baby. Until we started hanging out nine months ago, I don’t think I’d ever said more than one sentence to her, if even that.”
“It’s crazy how quickly things can change, like a snowflake dancing on the wind only to be erased in an instant by a hot tongue.”
“How poetic.”
Nancy and Steve soon came marching in with plates of pie and cups of eggnog, and they all gathered around the coffee table for lunch. They bit into the pie, soft and sweet with a bit of a crunch.
Nancy hummed. “Steve, this is really good.”
“Yeah, man. This is better than the pie my mom makes.”
“Thank Vickie. She’s the one who got me into baking.”
She shrugged. “It’s a nice way to bond and it’s fun. Not to mention that you get to eat it all afterwards.”
“I think I’m going to inhale the rest of this pie.” Robin placed a hand on her belly. “After all, I am eating for two now.”
They all laughed. Nancy shook her head.
“If I had a nickel for every time I’ve heard that one…”
Robin sipped her nog. “You know, if you’re looking for a good bonding experience, just get accidentally pregnant like we did. The only big downsides are the vomit and the cult-like mindset of those Mommy & Me groups.”
“Once we’re done with them, we’ll have to deal with the daycare moms.”
“People are the worst. Except for you guys.” She raised her mug. “To us.”
They clinked their cups. This was a very cozy place, absent of responsibilities. The tree towered over them and it was a mystery to her how it had even been decorated.
Nancy nibbled on her pie. “Vickie, I hope Steve got you something nice.”
“He got me these very nice earrings.” She showed off the dangling jewels.
“That’s nicer than anything he got for me when we were dating.”
“You’re just hard to read sometimes. What did she get you, Robin?”
Robin placed her hand on Nancy's. “She got me a photo album. It’s the best gift I’ve ever received. After the baby, of course.”
Vickie tilted her head. “That’s so sweet. Right, Steve?”
“Yes, it’s very sweet.” He tried to seem neutral, but there was sincerity in his voice.
Nancy smiled up at her. “We were talking with my parents last night about maybe having a wedding at some point, just a small gathering of family and friends.”
Steve nodded. “I don’t think I’ve been to a wedding since I was a kid.”
“I just want to be able to call Robin my wife, legally or not.”
Robin held her belly in her hand, smoothing out her dress. She needed a break from acting like an adult. She just wanted to forget about it for a little bit. She looked up at Steve.
“What movie did you end up swiping from the store?”
“A Christmas Story.”
Robin pumped her fist. “Hell yeah.” She nudged Nancy. “I should have gotten you a BB gun for Christmas.”
“I do love my guns.”
“It’s very hot.”
Robin pressed a wet kiss to Nancy’s lips, practically shoving her tongue down her throat and groaning into the kiss. Steve wrinkled his nose and Vickie snickered at his disgust. Nancy turned to him.
“Are we bothering you, nancy boy?”
“But you…” He sighed. “I give up.”
“At least you tried.” Vickie patted his bicep and kissed him on the cheek.
Nancy gave Robin a sly look. They were going to bone so hard when they got home.
After a few more minutes of light conversation, they kicked back for a showing of a modern Christmas classic. It was nice to hang out like nothing had changed, even as she felt the baby kick. She just shared a loving look with Nancy, hands on her belly, and watched a kid get his tongue stuck to an icy pole.
***
Robin woke late in the night to use the bathroom. She pushed herself up, pulled on a robe, and waddled out of the bedroom. The snow was still riding the whirling wind outside the window, but the trailer was warm and cozy. She did her business and began the walk back to bed, but stopped by the fridge to grab a cold glass of milk. She gulped it down and sighed. She looked out the window, the snow falling gently over the park, and slipped a hand in her robe. The night was silent.
Robin walked back to the bathroom and flicked on the light, studying herself in the mirror, running a hand over her bump as the other supported her back. Everywhere she went, it was just the two of them, her and Barry. She was going to be a mother in just a couple of months and, though the pain of childbirth loomed like a dark cloud on the horizon, she was excited to finally hold their son in her arms. She hoped that he had her physique for his own sake, but knew in her heart that he would have Nancy’s eyes. Just a year ago, she had thought all of this to be impossible in this small Indiana town, but now she had a loving girlfriend and a baby on the way. All that was missing was a ring.
She returned to the bedroom and sank into bed beside Nancy, looking down at her sleeping face. They had never really figured out who was the dominant one in the relationship and it seemed to be a situational thing, but Nancy had taken control when Robin got pregnant, “taking the bull by the horns” as Karen had put it. Robin had always been a relatively disorganized person, but Nancy was a multitasker by nature who could juggle half a dozen things at once. She made all the appointments, went to all the classes, read all the books, did all the shopping, did all the driving, and waited on her hand and foot. She was the most brave person Robin had ever met.
Rolling onto her side, Robin faced Nancy, brushing her curls away from her face and rubbing her cheek with her thumb. She was a very pretty woman, her build fragile but her jawline strong. She could see traces of the man that Andy Wheeler might have become, but they did not lessen her beauty in the slightest. Robin got the sense that she really was happy for once in her life and it was a feeling that she understood.
Robin thought about what waited for her a year from now. She could see them sitting on the couch with Barry in her lap and Nancy’s head on her shoulder, rings adorning their fingers. “Happy Holidays from the Buckley Family.” It brought a smile to her face. She couldn’t wait for next Christmas.