Archive of Our Own

Peter is tired, nothing grand really, its december, its a mix between people being jolly for the holidays and those who are lonely and miserable. They were in London as his crew wanted the time off and Tadeas mentioned some of them getting a bit too antsy after the last trip so he is staying put.

Meaning he is at the flat. Elias is busy at work, which is good, usually he would be cleaning the flat to pass the time or assemble a ship in a bottle for funsies, but today he feels just…tired.

For no reason really! He woke up late, usually he is the first one up, making breakfast and also being a little shit by denying Elias his presence in bed when he wakes up, but today he overslept and by the time he woke up his husband was out for work.

Next thing was that despite being lunchtime Peter didn't feel like cooking, he finally had access to a kitchen for himself and now he just felt too exhausted to go and make himself something. Instead he checks the pantry and finds some instant noodles, Elias keeps a stash for when he is too lazy to cook.

So he takes a pack, boils some water and puts it inside, waiting for the five minutes to pass so he can eat and slurp on some soup. Its not much but it's warm and he is feeling lazy today. The weather doesn't help, making him more sleepy despite already having slept most of the morning.

The cats run around, trying to get him to play with him, he doesn't really feel like throwing toys so he picks up the laser pointer and sits while messing around with them. It eats at least half an hour of his time, where he starts to feel kind of weird.

Sweaty.

Huh. Peter barely sweats, the lonely always cooling him down, despite apparently being very warm to the touch. He blinks a few times and elects to maybe take a shower, he puts the laser pointer down and goes to the bathroom, maybe some cool water will do him well.

He decided on a bath because he was really too tired to be standing around, so lukewarm water sounded nice. At least to him, Elias would call it an abomination to god, the man is cold like a corpse and showers with fire against his skin. 

Peter will never shower with Elias, but sharing a bath even with high temperatures feels more relaxing than being pelleted with burning water. 

Anyways, he prepares the water and sits down in the bathtub letting his head lay back against the tub. It feels nice and the sensation of unease was at least slowly melting away. Somewhat at least, he was still tired and feeling odd, but the bath seemingly helped and maybe if he takes that nap he would be fine.

He must doze off because he eventually opens his eyes to himself shivering in the now cold water. Stiff and feeling a bit dazed, he gets out from the bathtub, draining the water and putting on a pair of boxers, some shorts and a shirt. With that he goes to bed, crawling under the covers and laying down still.

Its funny really, reminds him of when he was a child. Whenever he felt weird he would just crawl back to bed and stay still till it went away. He has vague memories of the nannies dropping by to check on him.

Peter hears the cats running around the other room, but he is too tired to call out to them to knock it off from breaking something, he just curls up on his side, shivering a bit even with the covers. A nap, a real, actual proper one…

It doesn't take long for him to fall asleep.

—

When he wakes up, he feels hot and sweaty, he clearly kicked out the sheets away from him at some point. He was spread out in bed and Captain was right next to his face purring, which would be nice usually, but he felt a bit too bad to consider how cute it was.

His mouth was dry and he felt terrible, he thought the nap would help, but Peter just was feeling even worse than this morning. He didn't even know what time it was, when Elias was coming over.

He would complain about him lazing around the entire day, he didn't clean the living room or the kitchen, he didn't make breakfast or dinner…he slept all day long. Sure he lies to annoy the man, but he didn't think he could handle snide little comments about him being spoiled and lazy today.

Peter should…maybe try to vacuum the living room.

Maybe.

Standing up was tortuous, he suddenly felt dizzy and the entire room spun on him, it was enough to make him fall back in bed as everything just kept moving around him. He had a momentary thought wondering if he was dying. Which was a bit stupid, why would he be randomly dying now? He knows the symptoms of a heart attack, and this was not it.

He ate instant noodles, so not poisoned by some of Elias' schemes, if the man randomly decided to kill him he doubts he would poison a package of ramen he left in the back of his cupboard. Hell it can't be food poisoning either, the ramen was fine, and last night he and Elias just ate pizza, during lunch he made chicken with curry. It wasn't even the first time he made it, the chicken was fresh and nothing was raw…

No food poisoning, he would have thrown up, he feels a bit nauseous but that's due to his head spinning.

So no, he doesnt think he could be dying, and he didn't have contact with any avatars, artifacts or anything supernatural besides Elias and the cats and none of them would just kill him like this.

Elias would probably knock him unconscious and steal his eyes or straight up shoot him if he needed to. Hell he could have choked him with a pillow this morning if he wanted him dead for whatever reason.

…

The last and most obvious yet rare thing, would be for him to be…ill.

Peter rarely gets sick, his heart being weak and two seconds away from collapsing aside, he was never prone to being sick as a child and the few times he was…he sort of had to go through it. Medicine would be provided but he had to ride it out on his own.

So yes, maybe he is sick, for whatever reason he just…got a cold or something. He should go and try to take some medication for it. His brain is slow, but he is starting to catch onto the fact maybe, just maybe he has a fever.

“Hmbit stupid…”

This time, he slowly sits up, trying to keep his head straight and to not fall with dizziness. After a few minutes, he ventures to stand up, which makes his stomach lurch, but that's it. He slowly goes to the bathroom to check for the medicine cabinet to get something to lower his fever.

Elias also rarely gets sick and when he does its a whole ass nightmare. The man has a tendency to have nightmares and hallucinate sometimes, or maybe he confuses his dreams with reality and he thrashes in bed, thinking he is drowning.

Always drowning. 

Taking care of him is a necessity because Peter is sure if the eye wasn't keeping him alive, Elias would straight up die on his own. Bite his tongue by accident or have his fever cook him from the inside out. 

He is not that better, but Elias told him that Peter tends to sleep a lot and have nightmares, albeit he rarely makes noise. Just curls up like a….wild animal waiting to die on his own.

“Its almost kind of…” Sad. He didn't finish the sentence but Peter knew and it infuriated him. So neither of them say anything about the other when they are sick, both knowing they are in a precarious situation and…trusting enough that the other won't use that.

Peter gets to the bathroom he finds the pills, and has to struggle to read the bottles to see which one it is. He is not wearing glasses and the letters are so tiny and blurry he has to squint and its not making his headache any better.

He finally finds the right ones and he downs them with some water from the tap. Not the best option but if he has to go to the kitchen feeling like this he might black out completely. Once he took the pills he dragged himself back to bed, any plans for cleaning or doing something out of the window. All he can manage to do is try and hope that by the time Elias comes back he feels just a smidge better.

—-

Elias' day was quite calm, no unruly archivist, the head of the departments had no complaints, his few meetings went well and he had some time to do some extra scheduling for next week. which means he had everything ready for when Simon would come to talk business.

Always a delight to be prepared beforehand.

He did roll his eyes at Peter oversleeping this morning, but he gave him a pass, he came back for the holidays and he knows that usually leads to him getting all hyper about the people in the city being lonely or kind of in a mood because everything is so jolly.

When he arrives home, everything is quiet and the lights are off, hm, perhaps he left to buy groceries? As he moves to leave his coat on the hanger and go to their bedroom, he hears the sound of the cats meowing. Puzzled, he enters the room and sees all three cats were huddling next to Peter. Captain meowing very loud next to his face, the sailor was breathing heavily but not moving at all. 

The bed was a mess, Peter was only in a pair of boxers and his face was flushed and sweaty.

Duchess was purring loudly over his chest, Captain was meowing and pawing at his face while Empress Socks just kept bumping her head against his side.

“Fuck”

Moving the cats away, Captain hissing at him as he tried to pry him away from Peter’s face, Elias touches Peter’s forehead, cursing loudly, he was boiling. 

Peter was hot, not an euphemism, albeit it held true to him, his husband was hot specifically for him, but he was quite literally boiling in a fever, it was not his normal warm temperature.

“You utter twat” Rubbing his face he goes to soak up a towel in cold water, wanting to lower his temperature, if he dragged him to the bathtub the shock of temperature could kill him. 

Elias would survive, his husband had to force him into cold water during one of his sick episodes. The Eye kept him well enough, but Peter’s heart is naturally weak and he could very well have a heart attack if he did that to him. So, towels.

He sighs loudly, it had been too much of a good day for something to not go wrong. Its not like Peter gets sick often, he gets sick even more rarely than Elias himself, not only that but he acts like a dying animal curling up in a corner and staying still, almost as if he was waiting for death to take him.

Peter gets delirious and feverish, but if given half a chance he also gets clingy. Elias tested it out once, he gave him a pillow and very quickly he curled up around it hugging it tightly while sweating and twitching in his sleep. When he is in bed, he latches onto Elias or ignores him in favor of suffering on his own, its a 50/50 toss.

Its no fun, when Peter is like this. He is not loud or annoying as usual, he is quiet and still. He has nightmares all the time but he barely makes any noise.

Its a defense mechanism he knows, the Lukas wouldn't let their kids die due to sickness, but coddling them too much when they are ill? No, you stay in bed and be quiet while you take your medicine. Simple as that.

Even now Peter can't help that same conditioning from when he was a child.

Elias acquires the towels and very carefully settles them on his neck, one on his forehead and on his sides. It should slowly help, just a bit, at least while he checks if Peter took any medication.

Once done he goes to the kitchen to see if he can make himself something to eat, for now there is not much to be done and taking Peter to the hospital would lead to questions and tests. God only knows what his husband would do if he were stuck there. Considering he is probably barely conscious he would freak out about being surrounded by strangers and having to be touched.

Elias can almost imagine his terror and it makes him curious. So very curious…but at the same time, Peter is…

…

He sighs, some things he cant cross, not even if he wants, not if he wishes their marriage to continue. Elias plans to make some homemade broth at least there are vegetables. The sailor went shopping two days ago, so he has what to work with.

At least the flat will smell pleasant.

—-

He opens his eyes blearily, feeling like he woke up from a ten day nap. The room smells pleasant. Next to him he hears humming, he blinks feeling confused and lost, when he tilts his head he notices that Elias was sitting in bed reading. Peter tries to speak but his mouth is dry like the desert, so he licks his lips and makes a noise. 

Elias shifts his eyes from the book and turns towards him, a hand brushes through his hair and then gently presses to his forehead. Ah…Elias' hands are so lovely and cold…

His eyes flutter.

“Now, now, don't sleep on me now yet, you need to drink something and also tell me when you took that ibuprofen”

Peter clears his throat and says he thinks its was around four. His voice is raspy and his throat hurts a bit now. 

“Hm, you should take another one in two hours but i think you can tank another one now. Your fever just got down, a little bit anyways. I will get you more cold compresses once you drink some soup”

He mumbles that he ate ramen at lunch. Elias scoffs. 

“Instant noodle soup is not actually proper soup. I made the effort to make you some actual broth you heathen”

Its sweet, but he can't help being a little shit even while he feels like hell. “Did you burn the soup? I don't want poison”

Elias' face is comically offended, Peter’s lips twitch upwards but then his lungs burn and he starts to cough, the sand papery feeling down his throat makes him feel like he is choking. His husband sighs and says that's karma for being an ass.

“Especially when I'm being nice to you, I could always dump you in a hospital. Do you want that hm? Nurses and doctors touching you and asking questions?” He shivers, a full body thing, recoiling in horror and disgust. “That's what I thought. Now, can you sit?” Peter lets out a deep breath and tries to shuffle to sit against the bed frame. His head feels like its swimming, he feels hot and bothered and not in a pleasant way at all.

He looks at himself and asks if he took off his shirt.

“What? No, you were like that when I arrived, you must have done it in your sleep” He has no recollection of taking off his shirt. He feels awful.

“Elias…i'm not feeling well”

He hears him sigh. “I know, let me go get that soup so you can eat and take another pill, then we go back to bed with you” Peter is lax and nods, his head getting all fuzzy again. “I hope you know i had to ask for the day off tomorrow, because i know you are not getting better tonight”

He says it in a matter of fact way. Peter does not want his pity, or Elias lording over him how he had to take time off from work to care for him, he should leave him alone so he can sleep this off. He tries to tell him as much, tries to fight him about it.

But all Peter manages, in his pitiful state as fever wracks across his body, as he feels hot and uncomfortable and as Elias is the only solid and cold, so blessedly cold and uncaring yet loving thing in his life, is to grab his hand.

Peter is pitiful and weak and he chalks it all up to the illness.

Elias pauses, he can see his expression turn curious and then closed off. Peter was about to move away, but his partner moved closer, his face right in front of his, making him freeze. Elias' eyes soften as he kisses his cheek, a short lived thing. Peter can't help but take in a deep breath, yet soon Elias is gone. Moving away from the bed, from the door he can see him go and he can smell the soup permeating the place.

When its in front of him, in a nice mug with the face of a smiling cat, Peter gives him a watery smile, his eyes sting, not because he wants to cry, but because his vision is blurry and the soup is boiling and the steam is making him itch.

It tastes…ok, it has everything it needs, its just that Elias is shit at making soup that has a good flavor. It can smell divine, but it will taste bland as hell.

….He still drinks all of it and when he asks if it was good, Peter requests a second serving as an answer. Its funny how he can see the glee in his eyes at such a simple thing. Elias drinks soup as well but he seems quite happy with it, when he sees Peter drink it, his expression is momentarily softer.

Its warm.

The soup he means, Peter too, he feels hot like an oven and the soup is hot too, but its nice too.

Even if it could do with some extra things to give it some more taste, but he won't say that. He will drink his soup made with…dubious love and let Elias bully him into going to the bathroom to wash his teeth and use the toilet while the man clears out their bed and gets a glass of water for Peter.

He takes another pill, puts on a shirt and Elias places cold compresses on his neck and forehead.

The cats all jump to the bed, albeit they remain by their feet. Peter feels more dizzy now. Elias remains reading so he moves, rolling to the side and pressing his head on his lap. Its weak he knows, but…

But.

Elias places a hand on his sweaty hair, he runs his fingers there and then he reads, outloud. Peter’s head echoes, his voice being the one thing he can pay attention to, he doesn't want to sleep yet, he feels sore, but he likes the noise, likes the sensation of a hand on his head.

They stay like that for a long, long while.

—-

The fever drops, the medication works at least, that is until early morning, where Elias wakes up to the feeling of being smothered. Peter was clinging to him in his sleep, which was not unusual once the man was unconscious, what was unusual was the heat .

Elias was sweating just by feeling Peter pressed against him. His best guess was that Peter was seeking something cool in his sleep and clung to him, but unfortunately it wasn't enough so now both of them were sweaty and hot. He has to pry himself away from him, his husband makes a noise of complaint, but he flops on his back breathing heavily. With a sigh he goes to get the towels wet again to place on Peter, then he gets another pill and shakes him awake for long enough to have Peter swallow it down and fall unconscious again almost immediately.

Which he will admit was kind of worrisome. 

Honestly he did feel concerned, but at the same time it was almost…enticing how lax Peter was, he poked his face and had no reaction, he lifted a wrist and let it fall against his chest.

Nothing.

It was almost cute if it wasn't so concerning. With a sigh he goes back to bed, he was a bit more cool now that Peter wasn't trying to melt his skin off. Elias rolls to the side, staring at the sleeping sailor. There was just a hint of light coming from the window. He could vaguely see Peter’s profile. His chest was rising and falling, but it had a bit of a hitch from time to time, his eyes were closed tightly.

Elias runs a hand across his chest, grabbing the hand that flopped there. He focuses a bit.

“There is a boy in a garden, he is sitting by a tree watching his siblings in the distance playing some games together. The older girl, Judith, was trying to hype up the younger of the three, a small boy with dark hair and freckles that resembled Peter in a way that he found uncomfortable. They spent some time doing that, just playing with each other, talking while the boy by the tree looked from his spot in the distance. He was annoyed by them, but he also felt curious enough about the situation”

Peter’s dream was a memory. A bleak one if he were to be honest. He speaks softly so as to not wake him. 

“He hated the closeness, but he also craved it. He felt lonelier like this, seeing them playing and having fun while he stood by the side. It was an ugly feeling and he was ashamed of it, but the real terror, the real fear came in when his sister turned around towards him, catching sight of his presence. Judith’s face was childish, but there was genuine softness there. Dark hair in a braid, she was taller than both him and his brother. Freckles and blue eyes. The three of them looked the most like their father before his passing. She turns to him and with a nervous smile she calls out his name. The sound echoing in the garden. It felt almost wrong to hear his name being said out loud”

Peter moves, twitching in his sleep. Elias moves closer, pressing his chest to his side. He kisses his shoulder with an awful little grin.

“At that moment Peter felt terror, because from the back door to the house he saw a figure, he could not remember her face. Not even then, she wore all black, and had a mourning veil, but he knew the sight of his mother, even if her face was gone. Judith's voice cut off as Aaron grabbed her arm tightly. Peter for his part quickly got up and started to move away to the nearby forest, better to be gone than to see her ”

His husband shivers. Elias wraps an arm around him and nuzzles his shoulder. 

“Your mother is not here, nor are you back there. You are home, with three cats, with me. And you may feel it's a trap but you chose that, me” Peter shiver is worse. “You chose me . You love me…”

“I love for you to shut up and lemme sleep” Elias lets out a startled huff, but Peter tilts his head to the side, closer to his face. “I need to pee”

Elias makes a face but Peter blows air on his face. “Disgusting”

“Eat my germs peasant, as if you never had to piss or-”

“Shut up”

“Stop seeing into my dreams…you are there, i can see you…you-”

Peter squeezes the hand Jonah was holding and then rolls away, stumbling as he goes to the bathroom. Elias waits, when Peter comes back he places the wet towels back in place with a tired sight, his husband doesn't complain. Elias asks what does he look like in his dream.

“I can't see myself when I'm looking, what do I look like to you?”

Peter is still feverish and delirious. Perhaps its because of that, that his answer sounds so…

“Eyes…n’static and ink. So much ink…leaking ink onto the ground staring at me…” Elias stares and Peter blinks blearily. “Like that but worse, stop staring at me, it hurts”

Letting out a breath he holds onto him, Peter makes a pleased noise as Elias presses a cool cheek against his shoulder. “Never, i will stare at you until you die”

Peter spits out the words with venom, but he is so tired it sounds like defeat. “ Monster , i only have one wish”

Running a hand across his jaw he kisses his cheek and settles for sleep once more. “Pity”

The sailor nods and goes lax. “I hate you” He doesnt deign that with an answer, they both know its a lie, or…its as much truth as the fact that he loves him back just as much as he hates him. Unable to be cold towards Elias for real.

Like this they fall asleep again.

—-

In the morning he is not that much better, Peter is awake but still feverish and very delirious, Elias sighs and does his best to keep his temperature in check. This time he gets him to take a lukewarm bath, Elias even joins him for it, he hates the temperature of the water, but he was mildly concerned Peter would drown. So he settles behind him as Peter slumps in the water, Its easy to run his fingers through his hair as he washes it with his favorite shampoo. Peter's eyes were glassy and he was barely complaining about it.

He usually stills when he tries to wash his hair, but he knows he loves it, he just doesn't want to admit he craves the touch and the softness.

Elias has no qualms about occasionally giving him what he wants, so he softly hums a few little tunes and helps Peter wash up, to get rid of all the sweat from the night before. He will change the sheets later too. Peter is going to lay down on the couch for a bit, watching a movie or something while Elias works from his laptop. 

For now he just pretends the water doesn't make him shiver, albeit Peter is warm enough pressed against him that it makes it a bit less jarring.

Just a bit.

He puts up with it because otherwise dealing with a sick Peter would be awful, that's all.

Its not because he feels something at seeing Peter sitting on the toilet looking a bit lost while he helps him dry himself. Its not that he notices the way his eyes are half lidded and tired while he lets Peter’s forehead press against his belly. Elias sighs and hugs him back, he only has a towel on his waist, Peter is still very much naked.

There is nothing hot about this situation at all, it simply is. Peter is naked and sick and Jonah is barely covered but he feels nothing but fondness for him. He has loved before and he will love again, but even in its annoyances he still finds himself caring. Still finds himself gently rubbing Peter’s hair with the towel to dry him.

Years ago, decades ago, he would not have bothered with this. Even as Jonah people tended to him , not the other way round, the only one he took some time to care for when they were sick was Barnabas and in one rare moment, Mordechai, but neither liked to think about it.

Elias sighs, Peter rubs his face against him, making him pinch his cheek when he hears him say he is soft, his mouth pressed to his belly button.

“I'm not ”

“You are, you got a soft body…you used to be a stick when you became Elias. You are all-” He can see him look up at him while still pressing his face against his body, Peter’s face is red, probably due to the fever while his eyes are hazy still. 

He feels him squish his middle, which forces a noise of surprise and embarrassment out of him, sue him for having a bit more of a belly! He is not a 26 year old half starved twink anymore! 

“Peter!”

He is really, really sick because his next comment makes his face burn, albeit not enough to blush. “I like it more, got something to hold onto”

“You are delirious with a fever and you just took a cold bath you heathen” But he does run his hand across Peter’s shoulder blades making the sailor sigh against his skin. His breath was warm like his entire body. He is surprised he is not dead, beholding tells him from time to time how high his temperature is, which in any regular human would warrant to be hospitalized. For an avatar is manageable but if it goes higher than this he should by all means get an actual doctor.

“Its christmas isn't it? Not enough depressed people around, too much cheer got to you huh?”

Its a flimsy excuse of course, christmas makes no difference, its not the first or last time Peter is in London during the holidays, the man enjoys it, there is always an air of hidden melancholy behind everyones cheery smiles. In all honesty its just bad luck, he gets sick so rarely it was bound to happen eventually.

Elias pulls away, Peter simply goes along with it, he helps him dry off completely and then lets him dress up in a pair of boxers and shorts on his own. Elias puts on some underwear as well, he is cold unlike someone else.

So he quickly puts on a pair of yoga pants and a long sleeved shirt.

Peter for his part just puts on a short sleeved one and he has to insist he wears some pants along with it. Fluffy socks are not enough despite what he claims.

So a pair of shorts it is.

With that he drags him to the living room where he flops on the couch while the cats all go to soak up his warmth like the bunch of thieves they are. Peter’s arms are full of cat, which is a good enough distraction at least.

With that he goes to make the bed, wash the sheets, and make something to eat.

He prepares some toast with cream cheese and jam for Peter, he has to eat something solid, he does make orange juice at least for his health. Elias prepares some coffee for him along with his own toast.

With that he eats by the table, not before telling Peter to release the cats to eat and then go cuddle them. He seems to ignore him so he is about to tell him off, but the man does roll over the couch in a clumsy manner holding Captain in his arms like a baby.

He sits and puts him down on the floor next to the table, then he stares at the toast and gives Elias such a miserable look that it has him roll his eyes with fake annoyance. He is far too fond of him despite the theatrics.

“You hate yogurt, and we are out of fruits that aren't oranges. You have to eat something simple and solid, so toast or crackers, make your choice”

“ I wanted an apple” He says that the same way a small bratty child. It almost makes him laugh, almost. He does however eat the toast with a grumpy expression while Elias makes the mental note to buy some apples and bananas later. God knows Peter gets picky when sick. Perhaps he can even make him a smoothie if he feels a bit better.

The morning goes well, Elias works through his own computer at home, Peter stays huddled in the couch watching a movie with the cats all around him, once in a while Elias checks on him, reminds him to take his medicine and progressively changes his cold compresses whenever they get warm.

Peter barely talked, he just watched the movie or dozed off, it was odd to not have him chat his ear off to annoy him. At some point Elias is over with what he can do at home from work, so he sits with Peter on the couch. He makes Peter lift his head so he could rest on Elias lap. Like this he can touch him freely, its always a delight to be able to manipulate Peter to his whims and when he is sick he is terribly meek.

Like a dying animal.

Peter lets him play with him, lets himself relax and grab his thigh with his hand, squeezing occasionally. Elias smiles pleased about it, yet he also controls his temperature, he plans for something to eat for lunch that won't upset his stomach.

He thinks about food that will make him feel better and of what to do in case he gets worse. Concerned for his health getting worse. He almost wants to scold himself for worrying so much, but he can't quite manage.

In the end he just relaxes with Peter till its lunch time and he moves to get them something to eat.

—

Peter has moments during the day where he feels worse and better, it was a toss really, he thinks the only reason why Elias is so patient is because he is generally more quiet like this, not as much teasing as he could make.

He doesn't like to feel like this, but his body is clearly not letting him get away with just a big nap to feel better, no, it has to make him feel like utter garbage.

In fact it decides to be such an ass that after lunch, it takes no more than an hour before he feels his stomach roll and he has to make a quick and bumpy ride to the bathroom to throw up. He unfortunately doesn't manage to reach it in time. So he wretches on the floor feeling a hundred times worse.

Elias quickly runs in, he has been in the bathroom, Peter’s eyes burn, he felt awful and ashamed and he was so shaky he felt like a leaf about to blow in the wind. The cats loveable idiots that they were, tried to come closer, but he knew at least Empress Socks would try to get close to the vomit and he would be in trouble so he pushes them away and tries to go get something to clean, because he made a mess, his face burns and Elias is staring at him.

“Oh for god's sake- Peter, stop that i will clean, get the cats out- No! Bad kitty! You are not eating that” He sees him scare off the cats who run off to their cat tower. “Peter stop moving so much go to the bathroom, wash your mouth and go to bed, I will clean” 

“But-”

“No buts, go to the bathroom, now” His face burns and he manages to weakly move towards it. Elias mumbles something he can barely hear, but he is sure he is cursing him for being a nuisance.

The idea of occupying so much, of causing so much trouble by being weak was making him feel more and more self conscious. Enough that by the time he washes his teeth and his vision gets spotty, he thinks he would rather sleep this off in the lonely. Not the first time he has done so.

He drops in bed, fog rising, static in his ears making him hunch over on his side. Maybe the cold makes him feel better, maybe he just dies there and its alright, alone and forgotten…

“No! No, not at all, you are not running off like this, you are going to really die” He hears Elias come in looking furious, Peter shudders and curls up against himself harder. His husband takes a deep breath before standing next to him. His voice is pinched but softer. “You are going to get killed, I should have given you more soup. That's on me. The floor is clean now, so please for the love of god, don't run away” He wants to, but Elias' hand is cool against his burning face. “You fool”

Peter presses closer, his brain too conflicted and messy to wonder why he shouldn't, he knows but at the same time he just spends what little energy he had. His stomach hurts and Elias is cold against him.

“I'm sorry” His voice cracks and its pathetic and weak, he is being pathetic. His family would be so disappointed on him, he-

“Oh, you are getting to that point of the illness huh? Peter love, you are not making a fuss, no more than you should, you were good alright? Just…stay here, let me take care of you for a bit, you know I will. Then we can pretend this never happened” 

Yeah…if only.

When he doesn't reply or make a move, Elias sighs and moves away. Peter stays still, hearing him go around the flat, eventually he returns with cold compresses and presses them against him.

“If your temperature doesn't go down, you are taking another bath, albeit im staying out of it this time”

He groans in pain, but he nods. “Alright, i want you to stay here, in bed, i will put a movie on the television. More soup for you, along with crackers, you really need something dry and solid, perhaps the toast didn't help either”

He doubts it just that but his husband merely mumbles a few things to do before turning on the tv and coming to bed too. Peter mumbles weakly that he should go away. Elias for his part kicks his shin and says he won't.

“I gotta make sure you dont choke and die, that's not a fun way to go and it wont please beholding”

“...of course” In the end Elias stays next to him, Peter dozes off on and off, feeling hot and annoyed, he takes another pill and after a while he is corralled to the bathroom to sit in the bathtub with water that feels freezing, yet according to Elias it was lukewarm at best. He stays there for a while, till the beholder tells him his temperature has gone off. 

His face is focused and slightly annoyed. So Peter nods without a fight, getting out from the bath and drying up once more.

Then he is back in bed.

—-

This goes on for two more days, the shivers start on the night of the second day, where he would randomly feel cold and start shivering violently. Elias kept telling him he was too hot and the room was very warm but Peter felt so very cold…

Eventually his memories sort of blur, making it harder to remember anything of what happens next. He has flashes of consciousness, but most of the time he is completely out of it, which is scary and terrifying.

Albeit through it all he mostly remembers Elias moving around, flashes of the cats crowding him. That at least is nice.

He remembers vaguely too, that he got a bit too hot and bothered in another way, getting a bit too handsy and touchy with Elias who seemingly was trying to cut him off.

“You are literally boiling from the inside out and now, out of all times, you are in the mood? Are you kidding me?” Peter’s mind was hazy, but Elias was there, soft, nice…Peter had been spooning him and he just pressed his hips against his ass and kind of- sort of…

“Eli…” He sounds whiny, which he hates, Elias shivers for his part and tells him to not call him that. Yet he doesn't move away from him. Not even when Peter’s palms sneak under his shirt. Peter’s forehead was hot and sweaty as he pressed it against the back of Elias' head. 

“Blasted…ah-” A hand sneaks under the hem of his pajama bottoms, wrapping around his half hard dick. Elias' soft breathy moan makes Peter wiggle closer, he felt…he felt awful but so warm and hot and he just wanted…he wanted to feel good.

Perhaps feeling good was a bit of a cross cable situation, where he wanted to feel better , but because he was so out of it he confused it with feeling good . With pleasure over sickness and pain . That's what he thinks a few days later when the fever finally breaks at least.

If you asked Elias, and Peter never would but that's not the point, he would say that Peter wanted someone to take care of him and to feel good on his own and since his inhibitions were so low it was simple to not worry about the fears or anything.

Just take what he wants and ask for it like a normal person.

Its of course a good thing he never asks Elias' opinion about it, because if he heard that he would disappear for the next five years out of spite.

What happens instead is that Peter just presses closer, what happens is that Elias eventually flips them over. Peter on his chest with him behind him. Its hazy and confusing and it feels good and Elias is surprisingly nice about it. 

“Holy shit you are so hot-”

Peter doesnt make any further comment, he just presses his eyes close and lets out a pleasured noise as Elias fucks him. Its like if he was floating in a cloud and nothing could possibly hurt him at all. He hears muffled words of praise, some complaints but all he does is move and comply and he feels…

He feels great, he feels taken care of and love-

Peter gasps and comes with an embarrassing whimper as Elias continues to thrust for a while longer, kissing his shoulder blades while his hands run across his back.

“Slut” Peter makes a strangled noise, but Elias kisses his hot forehead. “You are so awfully cute like this, and hot, in every sense of the word. Fuck”

Peter almost falls asleep, if it wasn't for Elias pulling at his hair as he finally came he would have just passed out blissfully unaware of anything. Yet instead he gets a light slap on the ass as the other moves and cleans up, pulling his boxers up. He forces him to sit up and gets him a cold water bottle to drink before rubbing his face with a cool towel as Peter lays down practically drunk back in the bed.

Elias crawls back and settles next to him. “That was surprisingly hot and I would love to do that again some time, but we should probably find an alternate way to get away with it. Because this is not sustainable”

Peter blinks slowly at him. His husband let out a sigh. “You are lucky I have gotten into my years and that I find myself terribly fond of you Peter” Drunk and high on…a fever and medication, he kisses him and says Elias loves him. 

He can't see his face very well, but the man makes a thoughtful noise before kissing his sweaty brow and telling him to sleep. “Unfortunately yes, it will never stop me, loving you”

Peter sighs and cuddles him, his mind drifting off slowly. “Tiss ok, i don't want you to. I like you better like that makes one so very lonely…”

“I know. I love you too”

Its nice not having to say it. Peter settles and soon falls asleep.

—-

Elias cares for Peter for three more days before his illness finally breaks. At least the fever, he was weak as a kitten but he could stay awake and get up without getting confused halfway through, he no longer felt like a raging volcano or had nightmares of his childhood or teenage years every night.

It was liberating.

At night they were on the couch watching something, Peter no longer laying on his lap, but rather sitting down, still looking pale and sickly in his parlor, but he also made jokes, he was aware of the movie and was well enough to be a little shit with Elias who answered back in kind. Things were going back to normal.

—-

When he gets sick a few days later, it becomes Peter’s turn to look after him with all that it entails.

—-

By the end the two of them celebrate Christmas in bed eating soup and some biscuits Peter made himself. Elias was sniffling and feeling like shit, bitching to Peter that it was his fault.

The other for his part took it well enough and just took care of him without much of a fuzz.

At least Elias gets a lovely new hoodie as a present, Peter apparently managed to buy it while Elias was out cold in one of his shopping trips for food and medicine. Peter for his part earned himself a sweater Elias knitted a few weeks prior to his arrival to London.

It was fitting they wore their presents while recovering from their sickness together. He reckons Peter will depart soon once he feels better, knowing this whole mushy business will grate on his nerves, so for now he enjoys things while they last.

The soup tastes heavenly at least, he knows his own attempts aren't that great, he is not stupid, but he did appreciate Peter not saying anything and just drinking more of it.

In return he asks teasingly if his soup was better than Peter’s.

His husband's face is momentarily so easy to read, there is a split moment where you could see him furrowed his brow and contemplate telling the truth.

Instead he says it tasted good.

“Maybe you can make soup from now on my lovely siren”

Elias scoffs and cuddles closer to him pressing a sweaty forehead against his neck in revenge. “No, i like your soup”

Peter chuckles and lets his head fall on top of his.

“If you say so”

Its ok, annoying but…alright. By new years eve they are both healthy again and they get to be as much of an asshole as they want, neither mentioning how clingy the other was.

They just…drink together and perhaps kiss a bit more softly for a while. It won't last of course, it never does, this soft moods, they will be back at each other’s throats any time soon but for now, on this little window of opportunity they both take it.

Why not?

They deserve something nice once in a while and after all it, it was in sickness and health wasn't it?

Till death does them apart and all that. 

“Happy new year Peter”

They were on the balcony watching fireworks.

“Happy new year Elias”

All is well.