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It was dark in the pride ring. Not exactly a black sky, probably more so dark red. The majority of the sinner demons, maybe some hellborn, were asleep. It's highly likely. Although this epic story isn't based on those hellborns, no this story starts at hell's GREATEST establishment; Porn studios. Maybe better known as the V tower? But let's call it porn studios for the funny.
It was the home to quite Influential overlord, the 3 V’s. This group has well, 3 V’s. Their first names all start with V. Vox, Velvette, and Valentino. 3 close friends. Although two of them fuck, (Not velvette, she probably thinks those two are weird. Ah sure she's right too.) They don't really say that they are a couple. Maybe? Idk brah this ain't a static moth fanfiction (Unfortunately..)
Vox. A television headed demon who was always keeping up with modern times; opposite to his rival alastor of course, was really considering going down to that Hazbin Hotel for one specific reason.
The radio demon.
As much as Vox would hate to verbally admit; he does slightly have a thing for the radio demon. Although granted it's likely not reciprocated. But a man can dream. Can't he? Despite being embarrassed by him on tv.. still though, no one can deny the fact that he's good looking. Hell even the cannibals agree. Not even Vox can deny that fact. Hah. He bets Angel dust offered him something sexual. Likely a blowjob. Because well, Angel is a good slut. It's what he does.
That's not what Vox does though. Nope. He's faced rejection from the radio demon before. When he asked him to join his lil team and of course; that fucker said no. Obviously Vox was pissy over it.
Not because Vox likes Alastor. That's STUPID! It would've been such a huge achievement is all. Pffft, Vox and alastor being a thing? The tv headed demon knows that would never become a reality. Alastor doesn't even get bitches, he's probably a virgin. Heh, Vox should get him a shirt that says he's a virgin. That'd be funny as FUCK. But he probably wouldn't accept it. Damn.
Vox thought. Honestly though, Alastor ain't even bad looking. Wait, who thought that?? These thoughts need to leave Vox alone. Oh but how could they? Vox always thought about Alastors STUPID hair, his cute- no, DUMB little ears that people are still somehow convinced is hair (as if bro uses wax..) That stupid monocle and his face that's certainly lacking the melanin that he used to have as a human.. doesn't take away the fact it's cute..-
His oddly entertaining triangle ass also gets an honourable mention.. as vox enjoys how it looks. Yeah he looks. Don't you? UGH. These stupid thoughts just bombard his brain.
The only mildly entertaining thing about Alastors triangle ass ain't his hole, as Valentino might think, no, it's his tail duh. It's kinda obvious he hides it, why else would his coat stick up like that? You ain't fooling nobody brah. People who don't see that shit are stupid. At least to Vox.
The one thing Vox doesn't think about is Alastors smelly gross hoofed feet. Like they are seriously fucking gross and makes Vox want to die. He's sure his feet are far more attractive than those of an emaciated radio deer demons. And he's not even into that shit! He just knows. He really does top alastor at everything, huh? Except for sex. He's sure Alastor would rather commit death and run into an angelic weapon than ever have sex with Anyone. Not just Vox. God he'd be shit in bed too. No one could top Valentino, except for Vox of course!
One thing Vox is really contemplating though is making his way down to the hotel. To settle shit with Alastor. By telling him how he feels - through song. Perhaps. Would be a good opportunity to tell him how much he lo- No HATES him! Maybe in the morning, Valentino unsurprisingly wants sex…. When doesn't he? Oh that's the cost of having benefits with the overlord of porn.
And so, Vox went to the bedroom. And no I'm not writing smut you dirty ahh minded mfer!!!
The next morning, Vox woke, wrapped in Valentino's arms, which he quickly slipped out of. Because let's just say, Valentino was really slippery after their fun time last night. Admittedly Vox did most of the work, but Valentino was so stressed recently. Wait this is a radiostatic fanfiction not a staticmoth fanfiction!!!! Why am I rambling about staticmoth???
Well, Vox went to the bathroom and got some wipes and a screen cleaner. Of course he can't shower, having a tv head and all, but he can still wash himself, which is good. He wiped the unholy milk off of himself, it was pretty sticky, so obviously annoying to clean smh. Then wiped his screen, since it now was covered in fingerprints. Since Valentino just loves bright shit. Then he got dressed into his usual outfit. One that mirrors alastor so much to the point the anti hazbin hotel fans are really really mad but that's the fucking point.
He was on his mission to talk to Alastor. Why was he letting the intrusive thoughts win? Who knows. But they were far too tempting for Vox to refuse; unfortunately.
The chance to see him in person again? Red drool left his mouth. Fuck. Meh, he doubts Val will care. It's not like Vox cares about Val's unhealthy obsession with Angel dust. Well if he did judge him for that, Val Would bring up his Alastor, that was so obvious to the moth pimp. As if that's fucking relevant.
Wait.
It is.
Oh, well, his mind is all over the place. Leave him be! He left the V tower, sinners trying to bombard him with an interview, but he knew how to avoid that shit by now. He stopped by a shop to purchase a boombox. He also had a song tape to insert called Careless Whisper. It was in his pocket. Hopefully it doesn't get robbed by some greedy fuck. Quite the emotional song, Vox believes. He's a careless whisper emotional truther.
He made his way to the hotel. Up the hill. But when he got to the door, he was greeted by the princess of hell. Charlie Morningstar. A friendly face to be greeted with, but not the friendly face Vox was hoping for. She saw that Vox had a boombox.
“Welcome to the happy hotel! Are you here to redeem yourself?!” Charlie excitedly asked, she didn't want to treat Vox differently because he's an overlord! She's literally the princess of hell and some sinners tell her to fuck herself. (That's not her job to do iykwim) but yeah treating vox differently because he's an overlord would be mean. She's against mean shit!
“Hello.. yes - I MEAN- No. FUCK. No, I'm not here to redeem myself at this fuckass hotel. It's a silly idea, redemption. So no, chandler.” He completely missed the fact that he just called Charlie, well, chandler. It's because Valentino had called her chandler when he was ranting, and it was what came to mind when thinking of her. God damn it val.. Although Vox knew that wasn't her name, he ended up blurting it out.
“I-It's Charlie!” She corrected. Damn she should start saying her name when new visitors arrive. She can't expect everyone to know her at this point.
“Yeah whatever.” Vox quickly said as he eyed the boombox he had.
“Soooo, if it's not the redemption gig you want, then what are you here for?” Asked Charlie. Vox began tapping his foot on the ground impatiently because he just like me frfr bro.
“It doesn't concern you, just get the stupid radio demon at this fucking door, and then YOU can fuck off so we can….talk.”
Vox was getting impatient as Charlie nodded and went upstairs. Although Vox just remembered that Angel lived here. How could he forget? Valentino spent ages ranting about it. Good Thing he and angel hardly talk unless necessary!
Vox then took a few steps back behind as he loaded careless whisper into the boombox, having his finger on the play button as he prepared to raise it above his head. Truly romantic. But he made sure the part to be played would be “TONIGHT THE MUSIC SEEMS SO LOUD”. I think it's called the chorus, idk. But it was pretty damn romantic if you asked Vox.
He waited a solid two minutes until he heard the radio demon come to the door with his trademark grin. He looked a bit confused though. “Ah have you finally stopped being in a pissy fit?”
Alastor asked Vox, to which Vox responded with “Shut up for once and listen, to MY SICK BEATS HELL YEAH!!!!”
Alastor shrugged and nodded. Then, Vox hit the play button, (not to be confused with the YouTube play button), putting the boombox above his head. Holding it high. And careless whisper began playing. Vox sang along, badly.
Alastor was cringing hard. He looked very disturbed. Which was a weird sighting. He looked so good damn concerned like someone save this man.
“YOU'RE ALWAYS ONNNN MYYY MINDDDDDD. I LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUUUUU~~~~!” He sang when he heard the instrumentals playing. Which wasn't even in the lyrics. He just blurted that. When he said that he looked surprised.
Alastor shut the door on him immediately after that. “What was that? Ya got a lover?” Asked the oh so nosy Angel dust. “That…was roadkill.” Alastor said before disappearing somewhere else.