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“Jason, you have to listen to me now. I forbid you from ever doing something like that again. Magic is not something you should use. It must never be your first move under any circumstances, and it must never be your last resort. People are afraid of monsters like you. They don’t understand you. That’s why you must not only hide it, but kill it. You are Jason, a little innocent boy. This magic inside you has never and will never exist. Do you understand?”
Jason opened his eyes in shock. It was some time before he stopped gasping for air in panic and just panted. It was still dark around him, not even faint moonlight shone through the gaps in the wooden roof.
It had been a long time since he had thought of his mother and even longer since he had thought of her advice. The funny thing was, Jason didn’t even remember what magic he had cast, and nothing had changed since then. He had no idea how to handle spells and had no idea how to control it. Sometimes there were just premonitions, and Jason knew they had a magical origin. When his mother was still alive, he had been ashamed of them, but since he had no one to rely on but himself, they had come in handy.
For example, he could always return to this hay camp. It wasn’t the most comfortable, but it was reasonably warm, dry and his premonitions usually let him know when someone would be dropping by the next day. It wasn’t always the case, but that was precisely why he didn’t rest on his laurels. He had to be clever; he had to be quick, and he didn’t have to be a magician. If he kept all that in mind, he would survive.
And that was all that mattered, wasn’t it?
Jason was too small for anyone to hire him. His arms were too skinny because he simply didn’t have the strength to train his muscles. He had tried it once, but quickly realized that it weakened him. If someone had attacked him then, he wouldn’t have been able to escape. Unfortunately, that didn’t help him earn money for food. So he had to choose riskier routes.
Like the afternoons before, he sneaked into an alley. Jason himself didn’t know why he was still doing it. Three days ago, he had dreamed of this very alley. When the sun was at its zenith, a carriage had stopped there, and the decorations on the carriage were made of pure gold.
Wishful thinking, a vivid fantasy created by a hungry stomach, Jason feared by now. But still he could not help hoping. He made himself small, hid in an alcove, and waited. Just as he was about to stretch and call it a day, he heard the sound of horses’ hooves on the stone pavement.
Jason’s eyes widened when he saw not only the two magnificent stallions but also the guards leading the carriage. Of course! There were guards assigned to protect such a marvel. Jason could have guessed that, even if he hadn’t seen the knights’ armor in his dream.
The carriage stopped a few meters away from him, and Jason bent down. He very much doubted that anyone could see him, but he didn’t want to take any chances. Nevertheless, he could hear the carriage door open.
“At last!” a childish voice called out, “How you manage to travel with this thing sometimes, even to foreign kingdoms, is really a mystery to me.”
“It was only ten minutes, Dick. If I’d known you were going to whine so much, I would never have agreed to this trip to the outer boroughs.”
Jason froze. He wasn’t stupid. Expensive carriage, knights, and someone called Dick. Jason knew exactly what nickname the prince used, even if no one in his class would ever dare to mouth that word to the prince.
Jason should keep a low profile and then leave as soon as possible. If he was caught, if anyone found out about his secret, he would be dead.
Why had he had to follow his dream? Why, after all this time, did he still not understand that life wasn’t fair and was out to get him?
The life that had given him magic without being asked.
The life that his mother had taken from him without him being able to do anything about it.
The life that had brought him close to a known witch-hater.
Jason didn’t even want to allow himself to breathe. And so it was only after a few minutes, when he got his panic under control, that he realized he could no longer hear anything. The carriage was still there, but neither the royal highnesses nor the knights were anywhere to be seen.
This was his chance to disappear.
Jason scrambled to his feet and hurried in the direction the carriage had come from before jerking to a halt and turning around. The horses were on the other side, and the carriage was unguarded.
Jason shouldn’t do it, but if he was quick and didn’t hesitate, he might have a chance.
Heart pounding, Jason yanked open the door and grabbed the first shiny object he saw before reaching for a second and turning back around. Two things were better than nothing. Faster than ever, he ran down the alley and as far away as he could get.
Only when he was safely in his hiding place did he dare to look at his prey. In his right hand was a beautiful brooch. It did not appear to have been made of precious metal, but it was of high quality workmanship. A bird, which could not have been more beautiful, had raised its eyes and seemed to be staring directly at Jason.
A sharp pain spread through his left hand. Surprised, he looked down and only now realized that he had apparently been holding a dagger at the wrong end of the whole sprint here.
Jason felt sick.
The door on the floor below him had been forced open.
He had left a trail of blood behind him.
This time, he couldn’t blame life. This had been his own stupidity.
Jason hadn’t stood a chance. He had blocked the few windows with hay so that no one could surprise him in the night and it wouldn’t get too cold. However, this also meant that the ladder down was his only escape route and he would run straight into the arms of the knights.
“Hal, here!” a voice called out, and it spoke so quickly that Jason almost didn’t understand it. Perhaps his mind was still distracted at the moment.
“I see it,” another voice replied before rising, making it seem even more threatening. These knights would not let him go. If they were directly subordinate to the king, they couldn’t be bribed. “Come out slowly, thief, otherwise we’ll come up and drag you out of here and that won’t be pleasant for any of us, especially not for you!”
Jason was shaking. He didn’t want it to end like this, but the knights would get him either way, so he had no choice.
“Okay,” Jason said, but realized his voice had been too quiet and repeated himself louder. “Okay!”
Once again, he no longer noticed the pain in his hand. He focused all his attention on the ladder. Very slowly, he approached it and could already glimpse the raised swords.
Would they execute him immediately? Jason had stolen directly from the king, which could be considered treason. Who was Jason kidding here? It was clearly treason. No loyal citizen would ever have considered stealing from their own king.
“Please, I’m sorry,” he tried to plead as he stepped down the first few steps. He could see his own blood on the rungs. He couldn’t even have hidden in the hay. He’d driven himself into such a trap of his own.
It wasn’t until Jason touched the ground and turned around that he realized one knight was staring at him open-mouthed, while the other put on a particularly serious face and grabbed his arm.
“Where’s the brooch?” he asked in a firm voice, and Jason couldn’t help it. He was trembling even more than before, but raised his hand, holding both the dagger and the brooch.
“Please let me go. I’ll never do it again,” Jason tried to bargain. He allowed the other knight to take the stolen goods from him and not a moment later, both of his hands were twisted behind his back. It was an iron grip from which he could not escape. Not that he tried, for he knew he had messed up and he also knew that many people would not hesitate to take out scum like him.
Perhaps, if he knew a spell, he could free himself that way, but then they would not only execute him, they would choose the worst execution of all. Jason didn’t want to be burned alive. Jason didn’t want to die.
“You’re under arrest.”
To his astonishment, Jason wasn't thrown into the dungeon, but led instead. He had actually expected to be shoved in there with a few punches and kicks, but the knight was surprisingly gentle. He had a firm grip, but apart from that, he had behaved as knights should.
It was hard for Jason to feel gratitude.
“You stay here until your hearing,” the knight informed him, speaking more quickly, and then closed the door behind him.
Not a second later, Jason turned around and took a look at the window. Unfortunately, it was too high up for him to climb out and even if he had reached it, he would never have been able to fit through the bars. He was locked up here and he would hang for his crimes.
What good would a trial do? He had been caught with the stolen goods and even a trail of blood that proved there was no other culprit. Jason couldn’t just claim that someone had put the stuff in his hand. No one would believe his lies.
Half an eternity later, dreading an inquisitor showing up and trying to find out if he was a wizard, the door was opened again.
The king stepped inside.
Jason froze. Was it already time for the trial? But why had the king come to him? Wasn’t it actually the other way around?
King Bruce had put on a serious face, but it wasn’t angry. Jason didn’t know whether that was good or bad. All he knew was that this man decided whether he died or not.
“Your Highness!” he exclaimed and the next moment he threw himself to his knees and bowed his head. He felt tiny and knew that his subservience would change nothing. If he had had any respect for his king, he would not have dared to steal from him.
“Look up,” King Bruce ordered in an iron tone, and Jason obeyed. He didn’t want to, because he didn’t like the way the king could see into his innermost being. Could he see what secret Jason was still trying to keep? Was that possible?
“You stole from me.” The statement didn’t sound like a question, yet Jason nodded. But in the silence that followed, he sensed that the king expected him to answer. His throat was dry, but Jason forced himself to answer. Just barely, he managed not to stammer throughout.
“Y-Y-es, my king.”
If it satisfied the king that Jason admitted it, was honest, he didn’t show it. His expression was unreadable, and Jason didn’t like it.
“What is your name?”
Briefly, Jason considered lying, but he was a nobody and if he was going to die, he was going to die with his own name.
“Jason Todd, sir.”
“Where are your parents?”
Jason just shook his head. His mother had died and his father had abandoned him. Jason couldn’t put into words how long he had been on his own. Fortunately for him, the king seemed to understand.
“You know the punishment for theft?”
“Yes,” Jason replied. Public humiliation if it went well. Public flogging if it went badly.
“You know what the punishment is for treason?”
Jason swallowed, but he answered anyway. “Yes.”
“What do you have to say for yourself?”
Tears formed in Jason’s eyes.
“I’m sorry. I should never have stolen from you. You run your kingdom with a lot of love, and I had no right to betray you like that. I... I just wanted... to…”
The king waited patiently, but Jasons only managed to whisper the last word. “Survive.”
“Mhm.”
Jason didn’t know what that meant. Had he signed his death warrant? Should he have begged for more? What had the king just decided?
“In that case, I suppose I owe you an apology. As king, it is my duty to look after my subjects. If a defenseless child like you has to resort to such means, then I have failed.”
Jason stared at him, perplexed. This ... This could only be a joke. No king in the world should ever apologize. Jason had made his own decisions. To what extent was that King Bruce’s fault?
“Nevertheless, you have made a mistake. I want you to apologize to Prince Richard for stealing his valuables. If Richard forgives you, you are free to go.”
Jason swallowed. That was generous. This was a fair chance, and Jason couldn’t blow it. No matter what the prince would ask for his forgiveness, Jason had to fulfill it.
To Jason’s renewed surprise, the king’s gaze suddenly fell on his injured hand.
“But there is still time for this task. I will have you taken to the court healer first.”
Jason hesitantly stepped out of the dungeon after Bruce. Standing in front of the door was a very young knight with red hair. Jason saw exactly how his hand was on his hip, just above the hilt of his sword. Even if this knight wasn’t as experienced as the others, Jason didn’t doubt for a second that he would have drawn his sword faster than Jason could run away. Not to mention that he didn’t know his way around the castle and would probably end up either at a dead end or in the arms of another knight.
“Sir Roy, take Jason to Alfred and once Alfred has attended to the wound, to Dick. That boy owes him an apology.”
While Jason had felt that the other rides had been at least a little gentler with him once they had seen that he was no danger, he had the feeling that this knight was treating him with particular malice. As soon as the king was out of sight, he lightly nudged Jason in a direction to get him to leave.
“Come on now.”
Jason didn’t complain, but went ahead. At every fork in the path, he automatically slowed down because he didn’t want to go in the wrong direction, but this meant that Sir Roy pointed him in the right direction a little more roughly. Jason was relieved when they finally stopped in front of an oak door. Without knocking (he no longer wanted to be alone with the knight), he pushed it open and was surprised when the smell of lavender hit his nose. There were herbs all over the room and an older man, Alfred, he remembered, turned to them with a smile.
“Well, who do we have here?” he asked amiably and if Jason hadn’t known for a fact that he was still a prisoner, he might even have relaxed.
“A thief who hurt himself.”
If the hatred impressed the court healer in Sir Roy’s voice, he didn’t show it. Instead, he pointed to a chair and Jason accepted the invitation and sat down. The man looked down at him and, after a few seconds, Jason finally understood what he had to do. He raised his left hand and showed Alfred the wound.
“Mmm, fortunately not a very deep cut, but the blood loss is certainly not good for someone of your age and weight. You should take it easy for the next few days.”
“If he’s not convicted of treason,” Roy spat out and Jason winced. Tending to his wound didn't result in his acquittal. Only Prince Richard would have that power. Jason really wished he could talk to the prince right now, because the kindness Alfred was showing him only hurt. Jason didn’t deserve it.
“Sir Roy, I think it would be better if you waited outside.”
Alfred didn’t explain why he felt that way. He simply said it. Roy hesitated, but then complied. Apparently, the court healer had a higher position than the knights. I wonder if it was because he also tended to the knights’ wounds. Probably.
“I’ll clean your wound now and put some healing ointment on it. It’ll sting a bit, but try to keep quiet for me, anyway. As far as I can see, it won’t be necessary to stitch the wound, but a little deeper and it would have been ready.”
“I’m sorry,” Jason whispered. He had said and thought those words so many times today, but this time he was only sorry that the court healer had to deal with him when he surely had more important things to do. Only because Jason had been too stupid to pay attention to what he was stealing and, more importantly, how he was holding it.
Alfred laughed humorously. “Don’t worry about it. I’ve seen much worse wounds. Compared to some other injuries, this one is taken care of quickly.”
“Thank you,” Jason replied, because he was at a loss for words. He wanted to ask Alfred if he had any tips on how to gain Dick’s forgiveness, but it wasn’t his place.
Jason was a thief, a prisoner. Alfred shouldn’t help him any more than he already did. This was all Jason’s own fault, and he had to deal with it himself.
Together with Roy, they reached another oak door, which would probably lead to Prince Richard. Loud voices came through the door, but it was hard to make out words, especially as Sir Roy grabbed Jason by the shoulder and held him back.
Jason flinched. He hadn’t expected the touch, and he didn’t like the way the hand didn’t leave his shoulder.
“Turn around and look at me,” the knight demanded and Jason did, without hesitation, only to look into eyes that glittered angrily. “You will not get the chance to hurt the prince again. If you try to harm him, I will strike you down with my own hands. Understood?”
Jason nodded and bowed his head. He had no intention of harming anyone, he just wanted to get it over with and find a new lair.
Sir Roy seemed reasonably satisfied with the answer because he let go of Jason’s shoulder and pried the door open for Jason.
“You will listen to him!” shouted King Bruce just then, but Prince Richard did not seem to be as obedient as Jason, for he had his hands clenched into fists and did not seem even remotely willing to comply with the king’s wishes. Jason could only assume that the conversation was about him, but he hoped not. If the prince didn’t want to hear from Jason now, he would never forgive him.
But Prince Richard had to forgive him! If not, Jason would be tortured before he was executed. The prince was his only chance of escaping this fate. Hoping for the kindness of others was something Jason hated, but he had no choice. No matter how hard he tried now, in the end, it was out of his hands.
“Thank you, sir Roy. Escort me out the door, please.”
Roy seemed as if he was going to protest, but after a curt nod from Dick, he followed Bruce out the door, leaving Jason alone with a young man who clearly hated him. Something that made Jason angry. Of course, Jason had messed up. He should never have stolen anything, but the prince had everything he could ever want. Any of those valuables could have been replaced. So how did it justify this hatred?
“I’m sorry,” Jason managed to get out, sinking to his knees for the second time that day. His voice barely trembled, but the remorse he had felt in the dungeon was missing. It had given way to anger, and this was not a good time. Jason had to swallow his hatred for life’s injustices.
“No, you aren’t,” the prince hissed, and Jason flinched as he crouched down in front of him so Jason couldn’t avoid his gaze. Everything in the prince’s face screamed that he would wring Jason’s neck single-handedly without remorse. “I know you’ve convinced Bruce that you’re innocent and can’t be held accountable for your mistakes, but you didn’t steal from Bruce. You stole from me. If it had been his mother’s necklace, he wouldn’t forgive you either.”
Jason swallowed, and his eyes widened. He may not have been the most educated, he couldn’t read or write, but he could sometimes draw conclusions that others couldn’t. The guards had only asked about the brooch, not the dagger. The brooch, which wasn’t even valuable and therefore probably had a sentimental value. A statement about a mother. The fact that everyone knew that Prince Richard had lost his parents and had been taken in by the king.
“The brooch belonged to your mother?” Jason asked in a hoarse voice.
“Yes,” the prince replied curtly, his gaze not getting any warmer. Jason could go on and on about how sorry he was and how much he regretted it, but those words would mean nothing, because Jason now understood the feelings.
“Then I hope you can still forgive me one day,” he whispered, but he knew that Prince Richard understood him anyway, because his shoulders tensed as if he hadn’t expected this approach. “If I still had something of my mother’s and someone took it away from me, I wouldn’t be able to forgive them either.”
There was silence for a moment, but it was enough for a single tear to run down Jason’s cheek. Jason had already known in the dungeon that it was his fault and that he deserved to be punished. But now he realized that what he had done had not only been a breach of the rules, but had also hurt someone. How long had it been since Jason’s mother had died? Two years? And Jason still hadn’t got over it. It must have been five years for Prince Richard and Jason doubted that he had gotten over the death of his parents yet.
“Why did you do it?” Richard finally asked in an almost gentle voice. Jason couldn’t place it, but knew he owed the prince more than just an answer.
“I was just reaching for the first best thing I saw. I knew I was committing a crime, so I had to move fast. Whatever was there in the carriage would be valuable enough to feed me for a few days, I thought. I didn’t realize what exactly I was taking. I’m really sorry.”
Silence again. Then suddenly a finger stroked his cheek, smearing the tears that were now flowing down Jason’s cheeks at faster intervals. “Okay. I forgive you.”
“What?” Jason asked incredulously, staring at the prince. Instead of hatred, warmth now awaited him.
“I said, I forgive you.”
Jason couldn’t even manage a thank you, instead a loud sob escaped him. He didn’t know whether he was crying out of joy or simply because the nightmare of the past few hours was finally coming to an end. All he knew was that he was being embraced in a warm hug by someone who was supposed to hate him.
It felt good.