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She found out the 21; he didn’t know how. Ogata was almost sure there was no person alive who knew when his birthday was, but somehow Asirpa had the information and had called him at night loudly, proclaiming they were going to celebrate it with Sugimoto and Shiraishi.
He didn’t have a chance to say no with her hanging up then and there.
After staring at his phone, trying to process what had happened and trying to determine if it was a hallucination born of exhaustion, he texted Sugimoto to tell him he wasn’t going to go.
He instantly replied, saying he didn’t allow him to cancel either and threatened to beat him up if he didn’t show up at the park the next day. Ogata laughed at the threat and decided going to bed was his best option.
…………………
The next day he woke up with the idea there was something he should remember; he quickly threw away that feeling and decided to sleep the whole day.
Just to be promptly woken up a few hours later by someone bashing his door repeatedly. He would have ignored them and called the police, but at that point, his door gave in to the assault, and angry shouts filled his apartment. He barely had time to sit up when a really angry Sugimoto was standing at his door.
Sugimoto may have jumped him then and there if Asirpa hadn't come running after him.
“Get dressed!” She said this, looking in his direction. “We are going to the aquarium and then the zoo!” Ogata stared at her before flopping back into bed.
“No.” He said covering himself with a blanket, which was quickly taken from him by an angry Sugimoto.
“Asirpa told you to get dressed.” Sugimoto snarled, keeping the blanked away.
“It’s cold.” He said making no attempt to get it back.
“Come on, Ogata, don’t you want to go and do something fun for your birthday?” Shiraishi said from the door.
“No.” He blinks, looking at Asirpa. “I’m fine staying at home and just sleeping.”
“But birthdays are to celebrate!” She said this, crossing her arms.
“This is how I celebrate it.” He shrugged; he didn’t see a reason to change his routine; it was how it had been since he remembered.
"Well, not today.” Asirpa said firmly. “Get dressed, or Sugimoto will have to do it.” She said leaving the room.
“What?” He heard Sugimoto scream. “Asirpa, you are joking, right?” He asked, going toward the door.
“No, make sure he gets dressed.” She said it from the common area. Sugimoto looked at Ogata, who just smiled at him.
“You heard her; help me get dressed, Sugimoto.” He said lying back down on the bed. Even with his eyes closed, he could see the other man fuming. If he could avoid this, at least he could have his fun in the meantime.
…………………………
“First stop is the aquarium,” Asirpa said, leading the group. She said she had the whole day planned. It was already late morning when they went out, but she said it was not an issue with the time. First the aquarium, then the zoo, then get a cake at a store and go back to Ogata’s apartment. Ogata had told her the first two activities could take a whole day, but she insisted they should go.
“It’s cold.” He complained hiding his chin in his scarf.
“It isn’t that cold.” Shiraishi said, bumping him with his shoulder. Ogata glared at him as Shiraishi raised his hands in surrender.
“Maybe if you went out more, you wouldn’t feel cold all the time.” Sugimoto said, glaring at him.
“It is cold outside; that is why I don’t go out unless I have to.” Ogata stated the obvious.
“You will never get used to the cold like that.”
“I don’t need to. I’m perfectly fine with how I live.” Sugimoto rolled his eyes but dropped it. A few minutes of silence passed while they walked with Ogata, wishing he was back home in his bed.
When they arrived at the aquarium, Asirpa ended up going with Sugimoto to ask for the tickets, trying to hurry him to get in. Quickly, she ran back to them, pointing at the aquarium. When Ogata didn’t move, she tried to push him in the direction of the door, but he didn’t budge a bit, looking around the area, pretending he wasn’t putting any strength into staying in place.
Sugimoto sighed, grabbed Ogata by the elbow, and moved towards the aquarium. Once inside, he let go of Ogata, following Asirpa in the direction she was going, with Shiraishi following soon after leaving Ogata for last. He stood there for a moment, considering turning around and going back home, but he was sure Asirpa would send Sugimoto to grab him, and he was too cold to have a fight in the streets.
Also, the building had a nicer temperature than outside.
Asirpa kept the lead, guiding them, pointing at different aquatic creatures, and giving information about them as if she were a tour guide. Shiraishi and Sugimoto listened with attention, and Ogata boredly looked around. It wasn’t a place he was much interested in visiting; he wasn't sure why Asirpa had chosen it.
It wasn’t until they reached the deep-sea section that something caught his attention; it wasn’t hard to recognize, even if he never saw one alive. An anglerfish was going around the tank, not caring about anything. He stood in front of the tank, staring at it.
Looking at it, he could feel the cold sensation spread through his body, one that he was too familiar with, and with it came some memories that he was just barely keeping at bay, ones he preferred not to dwell on, especially on this day.
"Hyaku, come, it is time for your special dinner.” He faintly heard a feminine voice, keeping his eyes open so the images didn’t follow.
This is why he preferred to sleep on this day.
It felt like he stood there for an eternity before a smaller hand grabbed at his arm. He forces himself to look down at Asirpa; she seems worried.
“Are you ok, Ogata?" She asked, gripping his hand. He looked away, taking a deep breath to ground himself. She didn’t say anything; she just stood by him, squishing his hand tightly.
Finally, he looked down at her again and nodded. She stared at him for a moment, making sure he wasn’t lying, before nodding herself and slowly letting go.
“Ok, let's go to the gift shop and then to the zoo.” She said smiling, trying to lighten the mood. Ogata just nodded again and followed her, ignoring all the other creatures in the tanks.
Once at the giftshop, Shiraishi, Asirpa, and Sugimoto started to look at the different objects on it. Ogata waited by the side, not interested in getting anything. He was once again considering the option of ditching the others and going back home when he noticed that in the corner close to him there was a hand-sized deep blue anglerfish plush.
Ogata blinked; he expected a plush of that fish to look anything but ugly, but the small plush actually looked ridiculous, almost cute. It didn’t look like something people would buy, even in an aquarium. He picked one up and turned it around; it fit comfortably in one hand, and the color wasn’t bad; it wasn’t the same as the real one, and that was fine. He could look at this one.
“Ogata, let's go to the zoo!” Asirpa called from the door, and Ogata looked down at the plush and put it back in its place. It seems like he lost his chance to run away.
He followed Asirpa and Sugimoto outside; he didn’t see Shiraishi, so he assumed he had either gone to the bathroom or a shark had managed to grab him on their way out. Asirpa and Sugimoto kept no mind and started walking, leaving the building. Ogata wasn’t going to be the one to point out that the other man was missing, so he just followed.
When they had been walking for a few minutes, he looked at his watch. It was a bit past midday, they had spent more time there than he had assumed.
“Here,” Shiraishi suddenly said from behind him. Ogata turned around, just as the older man with the anglerfish in his hand. “I saw you looking at it at the gift shop.” Ogata looked at the plush and then at Shiraishi and his dumb smile.
“There is a reason I didn’t pick it.” He said.
“Your mysterious guy image is saved,” Shiraishi said, laughing, grabbing Ogata’s hand. “If anyone asks you are holding it for Asirpa, it is fine.”
“Shiraishi…” He said at the limit of his patience, but the other man gave him no mind, made a thump, and moved ahead to catch up with Asirpa and Sugimoto. Ogata stared down at the anglerfish plush, considering throwing it to the ground before pocketing it, trying to ignore the warm feel that spread through his body.
………………
At the zoo, Asirpa once again ran to get the tickets, with Sugimoto following behind. This time, Shiraishi and Ogata waited by the door and went inside when the other two approached. Asirpa keeps her role as a guide, taking them to see different animals. This visit was in the open air, but Ogata didn’t feel the cold as much as before.
He paid half attention to what the Ainu girl was saying while looking at the different animals. He had to admit he had some interest in this place; he had never been to a zoo before, and seeing the different animals up close was interesting. Shiraishi and Sugimoto looked like they hadn't gone to one before, either for how they gawked at the animals.
Shiraishi tried to get too close to the monkeys and almost fell into their enclosure. Ogata was sure he would be fine either way; they would accept him as one of their own. Sugimoto paid strong attention to the bears, as if he were communicating with one. Ogata huffed at the ridiculous idea and followed Asirpa to their next destination.
He was about to check his watch again when he heard something to his right, and turning around, he saw an auburn lynx looking in his direction. Ogata stared back. He didn’t feel worried; after all, the creature was in their enclosure, but he still couldn’t keep his eyes away from them, and it seems the sentiment was mutual. The lynx keeps its eyes on him.
This wasn’t like in the aquarium; there was no sense of dread trying to overwhelm him, just some weird calmness. It freaked him out as well. This has never happened before; no, when he saw lynxes on TV or the internet, it was a new feeling, but at the same time it wasn’t. He wondered for a moment if the lynx felt the same.
Asirpa once again approached him but just stood by his side, looking at the lynx.
“Do you like it?” She asked.
"It is an animal that has caught my attention since I was a kid.” He admitted. It was really the only one he cared about besides regular cats.
“Do you want a photo with it?” She asked, grabbing her phone. Ogata stared at her, stunned. He should dismiss her and leave. He really should.
“Sure.” Asirpa smiled, getting up a seat that close to get a better height, and told him where to stand so she could take the best picture. She took a couple, and when she was happy, she gave a thumbs up.
“I’m sending you the photo.” She sent two; one was of him standing with his arms by his side and the lynx ‘by his side’ looking ahead; the second was of him drawing his hand through his hair and looking down while the lynx was cleaning its face with its pawn. He raised an eyebrow at it, looking at Asirpa, who just smiled before going with Sugimoto.
Ogata stares at the pictures once again. He considered deleting them, eventually deciding against it and saving the second one as a wallpaper while wondering why suddenly it wasn’t as cold anymore.
Asirpa once again took them to the gift shop, and once again, Asirpa and Shiraishi started looking around while he stared at a corner, waiting. The only difference was that Sugimoto was by his side, arms closed pointedly, not looking at him, so he decided to also ignore the other man, preferring to look around the store until the other two were tired of checking objects.
“So, you like lynxes?” Sugimoto finally asked, still not looking at him.
“No.” He said, smirking, and Sugimoto turned to growl at him.
“There is no dealing with you.” He said after taking a deep breath. “You seemed really interested in the one back there.” Ogata shrugged.
“It looked interesting.” That was all he said: “You seemed interested in the bears.
“They are creatures that have fascinated me since I was a kid, alongside wolves. Sadly, those weren't any at the zoo.” He looked disappointed.
“Not every animal can be in a zoo.” He said. Sugimoto nodded and kept quiet once again. Ogata mulled over his options before deciding to give the other man a hand—just this one. “I do like lynxes since I was a kid—one of those childhood phases that seems to have never left.”
“Those are always important.” Sugimoto said, looking at something.
“A kid's obsession for an animal?” Ogata asked. The other man had moved towards something Ogata couldn’t see.
“An interest that keeps our attention on something concrete.” He said coming back, and before Ogata could say anything more, something was presented in front of his face. He had to focus a little to see it. It was a keychain; it was in the form of a lynx, similar in coloring to the one he saw outside but more cartoony. “Here.”
“For me?” He couldn’t help but ask with a sardonic smile. Sugimoto's eyes hardened for a moment before forcing himself to relax.
“Yes.” He said, hand still up. “You know how it is on birthdays, right?”
“I heard.” He still didn’t pick up the keychain. “You don’t have to give anything.” For a moment, Ogata swears that Sugimoto's face melts with an emotion he can’t understand before going back to neutral.
“I know.” He shrugged, looking away. “But I still want to.” Ogata hummed and grabbed the keychain; it was big enough to have details but not too big that it would cause issues with the keys. “See you at the exit.” Sugimoto said leaving to join the other two. Ogata just stayed staring at the little lynx.
They stayed for a few more minutes before Asirpa declared it was time to get cake and go to Ogata’s house. By the time they were out, it was getting dark, there was some snow falling from the sky, and the temperature was starting to lower, but even then, Ogata couldn’t feel it; for him, it was pleasantly warm.
…………………………………
They got a cake from a bakery close to his apartment, and they forced him to choose one. When they arrived at his apartment, it was getting dark, and Ogata had resigned himself to the idea that the others were staying the night. After they had all taken out their shoes and hung their coats, Asirpa instructed him to sit at the low table while she put the cake on it, while Sugimoto looked for glasses and plates and Shiraishi for drinks.
After everything was set up, Sugimoto put a candle on the cake, and Shiraishi turned off the lights, staying in full darkness except for the flame of the birthday candle. He stared at it; he had almost forgotten the slight heat that emanated from it. It had been too long since he had been in front of one. Maybe too long.
He closed his eyes and blew out the candle.
“HAPPY BIRTHDAY”
Could be heard from the other three, followed by cheers and clapping.
He couldn’t help but smile at it.
They ate the cake and ordered something more substantial to eat, and they stayed chatting for hours, more than the others than Ogata, who just preferred to listen unless he was prompted into the conversation. Eventually, what one could call his guest was falling asleep, and Ogata was considering whether it was worth it to get up to reach his bed.
He checked his phone to see the time, but got distracted by the picture he had saved as his phone wallpaper. The lynx cleaning his face reminded Ogata of the one lynx he left in his coat pocket. Getting up to retrieve alongside the anglerfish plush. He stared at them for a moment; they were really just cheap souvenirs; the others had gone for him because they felt like it. He had no reason to keep them.
He smiled, putting both on one of his shelves before turning around and deciding getting to his bed was too far away. Lying down beside Sugimoto, who was propped against the couch occupied by Asirpa, Shiraishi was on his other side, taking as much floor space as he could. The day had been long, so it wasn’t hard for Ogata to fall asleep. This was more comfortable than he would ever admit.
He didn’t feel cold when he went to sleep for the first time in years, and a part of him was starting to want to keep it that way as long as he could.